The Birth of Eve
by sawyersmine
Summary: Sookie a young naive 27yo on the verge of womanhood is dating Bill and living in small town Bon Temps, when Eric, a mysterious visitor comes to stay with she and her Gran in their home. All Human, Love triangle, Sookie/Eric/Bill. ES pairing, M, Angst.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: **Oh boy, lol. So I was definately planning on taking a longer hiatus and catching up on some much needed fan fict reading, but what can I say, Im impatient, when your muse sings, you have to listen. Im actually working on two fictions simultaneously at the moment. I also am working on a sequel to 'The Witch's Curse', a vampire story called 'Written in Blood.' I may set that one aside while I do this one however since this story seems to be coming out faster. So Im doing two things I said Id never do, lol. One is writing two stories at the same time, cause I hate it when reading other stories and you find out that the author has been playing hookey writing for other fandoms or whatever, and they take forever to get an update out, and its very frustrating. I promise I will not do that here. My problem is having too much to get out, not the opposite. Atleast for the moment. The second thing I said Id never do was write in the first person. Okay yes I dont know why, it bothers me sometimes to read the first person. Even while reading the fabulous CH. So this is a writing excercise for me to get over that hurdle and try to improve my writing skills. So hope you all dont mind being my gunea pigs, lol.

This story actually was inspired by two things. The first part is the title, which comes from an awesome book I just read called 'The Birth of Venus,' by Sarah Dunant. I strongly encourage anyone who loves art and the Renaissance, and early Florence history to go out and pick this book up. It is a marvelous read. That said, I only borrowed words from the title and the general theme of that story which is about a young rebellious woman coming of age in Florence who has more to offer than what society, government, church, her family, and husband, had deemed acceptible for typical Florentine women of her Era but through it all, she learns many life lessons about womanhood, her family, her role in society, and above all-love. The second inspiration for this story is my other fiction 'Save A Horse Ride A Swede' which was a coming of age story about two high school friends Eric and Sookie growing up in rural, Wyoming. I wanted to find a way to continue that fiction, but since the cowboy thing is not my forte, I thought Id start over in a way and bring it back to Bon Temps.

So now that I've rambled on long enough and probably turned half of you away by building this up so much, Ill stop explaining. Just one more thing though. I have written about 5 chapters so far and hope to get them out every few days as I tweek, but they will be shorter chapters than my other fictions. I wanted to take a more disciplined approach to this one and try to get things ironed out more, since I tend to be all over the place in my other stories. Typical Gemini thing, lol. Anyhow, without further adieu, here is...

**The Birth of Eve**

_Chapter 1: Innocence Lost_

The night I first met Eric was also the night I lost my virginity. Don't worry, I'm not like that, I'm not some one-night stand kind of girl. You see I was 27, but not just 27, I was a 27-year-old virgin, a virtue most men and women my age would consider extinct in this day and age. It's not that I'm a prude or even shrewish, it just never happened for me. I never felt that spark with a man. After, what happened to me when I was a child, which Ill get to later in the story, I was just more cautious about the kind of men I wanted to hang out with or even date, which in most cases meant not many. Not that I got out much, I didn't. It was safe to say I lived a rather sheltered life. In fact Bill was the first serious boyfriend I ever had. By the time I got to my late 20's, I knew it was only a few years before I was pushing 30. I had read in several women's health magazines that a woman fertility rate dropped 25% after 30. Again, I didn't want to get pregnant, I wasn't even married. But, I felt I was far past my prime, plus Bills patience was wearing thin. I couldn't in all honesty blame him. He had stuck by me when I probably wasn't the easiest person to stick by, and was faithful, and an all around good guy. He had been loyal and the kind of boyfriend every girl dreams of having, sweet and gentlemanly, he brought me flowers before our dates and my Gran was moons about him. There was a point when you either piss or get off the pot and I felt like it was time.

Don't ask me why we hadn't done it until that night. If anyone was to blame it was me. I had waited so long the anxiety had spun into a fast moving tidal pool that was slowly pulling me down. I just wanted to get out. I wanted to get it over with already. I was sick of being trapped in this cycle. I wanted to live, and be free and not be stuck living my child hood life forever. I loved my Gran more than anything and nothing would keep me away from her, but living with her all these years had permanently cemented my role in this life. I wasn't going to be one of those girls who got to take off, go to college, live adventures, and have all those stories to tell when she got back, I wasn't going to be some successful lawyer or doctor, not that I wanted that. I was strong sensible, dependable, headstrong Sookie Stackhouse. I was happy for the most part in my little small town life.

None of that was going to change. I just felt like I was up against a wall and if I didn't do something I might suffocate. I thought maybe through sex, I could break the pattern and cross one thing off my list. I wanted to feel what it felt like to really live, to stop hiding in my good little innocent pure small town Christian girl shell and really do something important with my life. We had discussed on our last date that it would happen tonight. It didn't matter that I was drinking more than I usually would on one of the most important and life changing nights of my life. None of it mattered because this is what couples did. Couples who loved each other had sex and that's all there was to it.

We were sitting in Merlottes, I had just gotten done working a 9 hour shift and Bill had gone off to get us some chili cheese fries when my life really altered, whether I knew it in that moment or not.

Time stopped when this tall blonde mystery man now known to me as Eric first came into the bar. He had an air of danger in his eyes, but also mischief, and a deep penetrating gaze that told me he was an old soul. He was the total opposite of my lily-white southern gent of a boyfriend who had just left to get us some refreshments.

If you asked me today what song was playing on the jukebox I wouldn't be able to recall, or remember what I was wearing or the words Bill had spoken to me before he left to go get our food, it was all gone... The music paused, the conversation, time…20 pairs of eyes all following him as he made his way towards me.

I felt my heart begin to hammer in my chest although it was a puzzle as to why this was happening. I mean this man was a total stranger, mysterious and dark, clearly experienced and raw. I frowned thinking not only was I some freak 27 year old virgin when other girls my age had been sleeping around for 10 years already, but now I was a pervert too? I didn't even know him.

I tried to look away in modesty, but his deep blue eyes locked with mine pulling my gaze back to him. My chest began to heave, as he got closer. He was huge. I was sitting, so at the time I didn't know how tall he was, but he looked like a giant, and those hands. They were the size of bear claws.

He smiled and all I could do was stare at his mouth. Those perfect lips shaped just like rose petals, his tongue peeking out just a bit to moisten them. For a moment I flashed to those lips doing things I never in my wildest fantasies had thought of, and my face began to blush and my womanly parts grew warm.

But before I realized what I was doing Bill was back. He was carrying the chili fries and our drinks apparently not looking where he was going and had just crashed into tall dark and handsome.

Fries went flying everywhere and as the spell lifted I quickly slipped out of my seat to help pick up the mess. Eric had assessed the situation as Bill cursed and set the half emptied glasses down on the table clumsily making even more of a mess with the liquid. I was trying to pick up the fries one by one but tall dark and handsome had found a towel on the next table and got them all in one sweep.

I looked at him, at a loss for words. I felt so small, his shoulder blades mere inches away from mine as he crouched beside and watched me. We were so close now that I recognized the color of his eyes as matching perfectly with the shade of cornflower blue featured on my favorite dress. I wanted to get lost in those eyes and found myself thinking other less virtuous thoughts as my gaze dropped subconsciously, but before I could study his perfection any further he stood up. Offering me his hand I took it.

"I'm sorry." I said, unsure of what else to say, feeling my foot crawl slowly into my mouth in embarrassment. _God was I just looking at his crotch? In front of my boyfriend!_ I felt so ashamed, I wanted to crawl down into one of those cracks in the sidewalk and never come out. Bill was glaring daggers at him and honestly I couldn't say I blamed him. Now that we were standing face to face or face to chest in my case I could see he was wearing a dark gray tee and black leather jacket and I swallowed.

"Why are you sorry?" Bill asked me, looking over at tall dark and handsome he replied...

"You weren't the one who wasn't looking where he was going."

I looked back at Bill my skin flush because I could feel the tension rising just wishing to get out of here, get out of here cause I wanted to escape this humiliation, and finally Eric replied...

"No, he is right, I am terribly sorry for ruining your meal, it isn't every day we see something we like and cant help but stop to take a closer look, is it?"

He looked at me a hint of mischief in his gaze and my eyes widened, jaw dropped unable to believe he had just said that, and then to my dismay his gaze dropped down to my breasts and he licked his lips as each pebbled to his delight one by one. I quickly folded my arms in modesty taking a step back and looked over from Bill to Eric when Bill stepped in between us blocking me from Eric's view and he replied sharply...

"Apology accepted, you can LEAVE NOW!"

He just smiled as if Bill was nothing but a housefly and began to step away. Bill eased his stance and turned to me, but before I thought he was leaving for good, he picked up something on the floor and handed it to me. His fingers brushed mine and I felt electric sparks shoot through his skin into mine as I took what he had to offer. His smile entrancing me, I had yet to look down when he replied...

"It was a pleasure Sookie, I hope to see you again, perhaps on a night when you are free (he added coyly, casting a distasteful glance towards Bill.)"

And then he disappeared.

My face colored crimson and Bill asked me as I dared to look back at him...

"Who was that?"

I shook my head wondering that myself, not to mention how did he know me? Now Bill was going to think I had been talking to him prior and that's when I looked down at the scrap of fabric in my hand. It was my waitress uniform. He must have seen my nametag. Oh god, now he knew my name and where I worked. This was so not good.

"I don't know." I replied and Bill grabbed my coat and held it out for me replying sharply...

"Well he was looking at you like a piece of meat, if he comes near you again Sookie Ill slug him."

I looked back and searched for tall dark and handsome and caught him winking at me from the other side of the bar. Bill added in warning angrily seeing Eric's gesture as well...

"Guys like that are Trouble with a capital T."

I nodded in agreement thinking Bill was probably right and frankly, I was a little perturbed that Eric had been so high handed and so snaky, it was rude and just not the kind of behavior I wanted to ever become accustomed to. No my Gran had raised me better then that. Bill was my Southern Gentleman; I was better off with him.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked me and I looked back at him and nodded my head, shooting talk dark and handsome a warning glare before I took Bills arm and replied with certainty...

"Absolutely."

Bill smiled and we left the bar.

----------------

It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be. Given my previous sexual misconceptions, Bill tried to be gentle at first but then his passion overcame him. By that point I had grown tired from the alcohol, which seemed to help the pain along and we finished.

When it was over, I felt more relieved than anything, but also I was grateful to have Bill as my first. It could have been far worse. I had thought. It could have been with some womanizer like that man at the bar. But I didn't feel as different as I thought it would make me feel. I was still the same old Sookie Stackhouse, the one from the night before.

A week later Eric was barely a faded memory. Of course now that I had opened Pandora's box Bill wanted to do it all the time. I just thanked the good lord and my Gran for always being at home which allowed me a good excuse. Plus I had explained to Bill that I really did want to wait for marriage until we initiated the baby making sex, or at least my wedding night. I wanted to be a modern girl, but I wasn't a ho.

Bill had seemed put off at first but as always he finally accepted it. It was Friday and I had just gotten done mowing the lawn when my Gran came out with a pitcher of ice-cold sun tea and a tall glass.

"Sookie!" She offered me the glass with a smile and insisted…

"I can't believe you did that whole lawn without coming inside once to cool off, you are going to pass out from this heat!"

I walked over to her and took the glass thankful for the refreshment and I replied with a smile…

"I'm sure it takes far more than mowing the lawn to knock me out Gran, but thanks for the tea."

I took a sip, which turned into a gulp and in about 5 seconds flat I had emptied the glass.

Gran had the pitcher ready to refill my glass before I even asked and I replied with a smile…

"I guess I was more thirsty than I thought."

Gran nodded knowingly and she set down the pitcher on a small table looking out at the property as I finished off my second glass and wiped my brow my grandmother replied…

"I appreciate all the help you have been giving me over the years Sookie, I want you to know how thankful I am."

I smiled at her and nodded. It wasn't anything I ever thought twice about but Gran wasn't done apparently and she continued…

"I feel guilty because I never want you to feel obligated to stay with me or take care of me…"

"Gran!" I interrupted in objection because I never felt obligated, but she wasn't done and waved her hand signaling she had more to say, she looked me directly in the eye and remarked….

"You have turned into a beautiful young woman Sookie…You deserve to live your own life, see the world, life is too short to be stuck here wasting away in the heat looking after an old woman."

I creased my brows not quite sure what she was getting at, but she didn't let me finish my thoughts and she explained…

"I know you like Bill a lot, and I want you to know that you don't have to stay here with me, for heavens sake, before I met your grandfather I don't think I spent one night home…"

"What are you saying?" I asked her confused and she replied…

"I'm saying I want you to go out and have some fun, with that boyfriend of yours or your friends."

"But what about the house?" I asked her knowing surely she couldn't do everything at home herself. She was always a spry and independent woman but her age was wearing on her, and she shook her head and put her hand on my shoulder assuring me…

"Don't you worry about that, I decided that this place needed some sprucing up, so I rented out your brothers old bed room for 3 months in exchange for some good old fashioned elbow grease to fix this place up."

"You what??" I asked her surprised wondering when this stranger was coming into our lives not really liking the idea and she responded…

"Well lets face it, I'm not going to be around forever and this house is older than dirt, so I figured it needs some work before I give it to you."

I frowned not liking the tone in her voice nor her choice of subject. That was so not why I was hanging around and I shook my head resisting I replied turning to look at her…

"Well I don't want the house Gran, so save your money."

She smiled and shook her head and replied with that mischievous glint she sometimes got…

"Don't worry, I saved some for you and your brother too…maybe it could be just enough to get out of here and see the world."

She winked back at me but I just rolled my eyes and shook my head in refusal.

"I'm doing just fine on my own. And what about this person? You just decided to rent out a room in our house with some stranger? What if he's a serial killer or something? " I argued and Gran came over to me and put her hand on my shoulder assuring me....

"Don't you worry about it, his family and mine go way back and I'm just helping him out for a few months while he returns the favor."

I shook my head unable to believe this. I lived here too dammit! The fact that this was a man did not put my mind at ease. Not after what happened the last time a stranger came to stay with us.

"I'm proud of you dear. Now stop worrying about every little thing. I want to see you have some fun. You don't get many days off so I'm banning you from doing chores for the rest of the day.

Suffice to say her words did not comfort me.

"I still need to finish the laundry." I argued and she simply shook her head proclaiming.

"We'll talk about this later"

I knew enough to know when my Gran said we would talk later; it meant not to argue with her. There was no winning. So I turned on my heel and had pulled open the screen door when I heard a car crunch along the gravel driveway.

"He's here!" Gran looked over at me with an excited smile and I looked back at her in confusion and then went back out onto the porch to get a better view. 'He who?' I wondered propping my hands on the railing as my Gran went down the steps to meet the mystery man.

It wasn't every day I saw a red cherry colored Corvette, this one had all the bells and whistles too. Chrome hubcaps, convertible with the raised hatch back, and the sporty hood. I couldn't deny that the car was impressive, but I knew what they said about men who drove sports cars. They were trying to make up for the lack of something and I couldn't help but smirk because in most cases it was true. I worked at a bar, I certainly saw all walks of life and the ones with the big honking trucks and flashy cars were the ones who were the most desperate.

I was just thankful Bill had a modest old jeep. With my yellow gremlin the pair of us could go down in the old unwanted car hall of fame.

I heard the car door open and watched my Gran walk out to meet him. Unable to help from rolling my eyes I thought my Gran was too kind to people sometimes and then I turned my head to get a better look.

My jaw dropped and stomach fell when I took in all 6 feet 5 of the familiar man standing across from my Gran.

It was HIM.

xxx

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	2. Chapter 2

**AN: **Well since my readers and reviewers are so awesome! I decided to hurry up and edit this chapter early. Thanks so much for the encouraging and wonderful feedback and hope you like this one as well. Ill keep my AN short and sweet this time. Enjoy!

_**Chapter 2: Introductions**_

The next few moments were all a blur as Gran talked to him for a few minutes pointing out the property and then he looked at me. There was no mistaking him as the man from the bar last night. My breathing grew heavy as my Gran brought him up towards me and she spoke although I didn't hear half of what she said...

"Sookie dear come down and say hello to Mr. Northman."

I swallowed and left the safety of my porch. He smiled and watched me like a hawk as I walked towards him hesitantly. My Gran was standing there with a smile on her face and he put his hand out to take mine. There was a hint of recognition in his gaze but he didn't let on that he had met me before this and he replied in that deep melodic voice...

"It's a pleasure to meet you Sookie, please call me Eric."

His blue eyes twinkled and as I reluctantly put my hand in his I felt something stir deep inside me.

"Well Eric it is then." My Gran repeated with a charming smile much to my dismay. I could barely say I was speechless but my Gran wasn't going to have any bad manners and she asked me with a stern blue glance…

"Sookie, don't you have something you'd like to say?"

I looked back from her to him and attempted to swallow the huge frog, which had taken residence in my throat. He smiled down at me those crystal blue eyes glittering with bemusement and it tore at something inside me.

I glared back at him remembering his crass behavior from the other night and I looked at him with annoyance as if the only reason for my politeness was standing two feet away and I replied sharply….

"It's nice to meet you Eric."

I looked back at him and thought I saw a hint of a smile and that's when I lost it. I couldn't look at him anymore. He drove me crazy mad. If he thought I was going to wind up as another one of his conquests, he had another thing coming. I yanked my hand out of his palm and grabbed my gardening gloves off the bench and stormed off towards the tool shed. I had no idea how I was going to survive the next three months if I couldn't stand 3 minutes. Then to really get my blood boiling I heard her proclaim to Eric…

"She's just a little shy sometimes. Come on son, I'll give you the grand tour."

Yet I felt his gaze burn holes into my back. I quickly looked down at my feet feeling like the biggest idiot that ever lived and honestly what was Bill going to think of this?

And then of course to dig my grave even deeper, my Gran called over to me as I frantically tried to get all of the lawn gear together and make a run for it, as if the idea just popped into her head...

"Sookie, You should take Eric out tonight with you and Bill."

I closed my eyes shut tightly wishing this wasn't happening right now. It couldn't be happening right now. But she kept going despite my failure to reply.

"He's new in town and I'm sure he would appreciate it wouldn't you Eric?"

I dared to turn around and look at him. Eric had his head down but as he lifted it he looked back from her to me as if in thought and then he finally nodded his head in reply while locking gazes with me.

"Id like that very much, if Sookie doesn't mind?"

_Like hell I minded!_ I thought angrily but taking one look at my Gran I knew I was on thin ice already. I was an adult don't get my wrong, but my Gran had no tolerance for rudeness, and she instilled her belief in Jason and me that every man and woman deserved to be treated equally in the eyes of God and the law. In most cases I agreed with her, but this time I wished I didn't have to entertain such ridiculous notions. He was a stranger, not only a stranger but an ass hole and a womanizer. I hoped one of these days my Gran was going to be proven wrong.

"Well Sookie, what do you think? Can you show him where all you young kids hang out? Show him what you like to do for fun around here?"

I didn't dare look at Eric in that moment because I knew Id catch a smug smirk on that ridiculously handsome face of his. Even now in the light of day, dressed in just a casual tee and jeans, he looked like he walked right off the cover of GQ. Damn him! I just prayed Bill wouldn't kill him, because if he didn't I just might. Finally after a long sigh I worked up the bravery and strength to look him in the eye and reply pointedly…

"Sure. Bill will be here at 8."

Something in his gaze forced me to linger there for a few moments more until finally my Gran concluded happily…

"That's just wonderful, y'all are going to have so much fun tonight, I only wish I was young enough to enjoy it to."

I smiled because as mad as I was that Eric was here I couldn't fault my Gran, her heart was in the right place, and I reached over and put my hand on her shoulder in empathy and that's when Eric surprised me by asking her…

"So why don't you?"

My Gran laughed and she shook her head and admitted…

"No I think my fun card expired about 20 years ago, but thank you for the offer." She smiled at Eric and he asked her to be certain…

"Are you sure?"

I swear I had to do a double take. Wasn't he supposed to be concerned primarily with putting a wedge between Bill and me? Isn't that how these playboy types rolled? I wasn't at all prepared to hear him ask my Gran to join us. Unless it was some other weird angle he was playing.

"Yes, I'm sure, but I want you kids to go have a good time, my darling Sookie here works herself to the bone, I want her to have a lovely night off."

He looked at me and replied with a smile...

"Then a lovely night off she will have."

I felt my face flush but before I could think of anything to say my Gran was already leading him back to the house.

* * *

I was relieved my room was upstairs and he was downstairs. It felt weird already having someone here that wasn't family, but what else could I do? I just hoped Bill would get a grip sooner rather than later, because I certainly wasn't looking forward to playing referee tonight.

After he settled in, I saw Eric out working in the yard cutting back some of the overgrown hedges in the yard, his gray tee gradually getting wetter and wetter as the sun beat down on him forcing his body to naturally cool itself. I saw my Gran pay him the same respect she had me and offer him a glass of her sweet tea, and he drank it just as thirstily. Needless to say I had to get out and run some errands because the jackass in the back yard was doing nothing for my productivity. The afternoon rolled on and I was surprised when I got back at how much he had accomplished.

Bill was punctual as usual and I was a ball of worry by the time he arrived. My Gran got the door, and I descended the stairs in my white dress and red heels hoping to soften Bills reaction by kissing him first, putting on the sugar. We waited for about 5 minutes and I almost thought Eric might be a no show and then he surprised us both by wrapping his knuckles lightly against the screen door. Apparently he had gone out to take a stroll around the property. This time wearing the most beautiful brown leather bomber jacket I had ever seen paired with a white tee and indigo denims. I had to bite my lip from drooling.

And then Bill turned around and saw who I was looking at. It was like everything happened in slow motion after that. I could see him tense up as his hands balled into fists and then he looked back at me and growled…

"What is he doing here?"

I met Eric's gaze nervously as he met mine, remembering Bills earlier promise to slug Eric if he ever saw him again, and then my Gran spoke up and she asked Bill…

"You two know each other? Well isn't this a small world!" She replied cheerfully. She looked back at Eric and I watched Bill as he glared in contempt and Eric finally replied…

"It's a small town, I believe we met last weekend at a place called Merlottes, isn't that right Bill?"

Eric liked to live on the wild side it seemed, his glance clearly taunting Bill. I knew one thing, if looks could kill, Eric would be dead right now.

His gaze flashed with mine but he didn't miss a beat smiling politely for my grandmother giving no suggestion that anything should cause worry and in kind she smiled back, clearly swayed by Eric's charm to which I was greatly relieved. I didn't want her to know I had met Eric before today; in fact I wanted to forget the whole night and get on with my day.

"Come on!" I took Bill's hand and pulled him out into the cool Louisiana night along side Eric. I was in no mood for small talk or complaining or bullying, because for once my Gran was right, I needed a night off, and I declared…

"Eric is staying with us and we are going to show him a good time tonight."

I knew Bill had something to say, but I just shot him a warning glare because I wasn't about to find myself caught in the middle of his little pissing competition.

I walked out to the edge of the stairs both men staring at me as if I had horns growing out of my head and I asked them matter of factly…

"So are you both coming?"

* * *

To say being sandwiched between Eric and Bill in Bill's narrow tiny jeep felt strange would be an understatement. Bill tried once to put his arm around me but his hand collided against Eric's massive shoulders to which Eric responded coolly…

"Perhaps if you need more room your girlfriend could sit on my lap."

I glared over at Eric knowing he was baiting Bill and of course Bill took it hook line and sinker and replied sharply…

"No I assure you if we run out of room I'm sure my girlfriend would be more than happy to kick you out and you can take the full walking tour of our fair little town."

I closed my eyes and shook my head, turning on the radio so they both knew I wasn't going to jive with that kind of behavior and Bill settled for taking my hand in his. I knew he was acting possessive and part of me didn't blame him, but that didn't stop me from looking down at Eric's thigh pressed against mine. I swallowed thinking how powerful his legs must be, and he smelled amazing, like a mixture of sandalwood, citrus, and something else I couldn't quite put my finger on.

"Dammit I'm running low on gas. Must be from all the extra weight." Bill announced begrudgingly, already making it blatantly clear that Eric wasn't welcome and this night was going to be unpleasant. He turned to me and proclaimed purposely ignoring Eric…

"Ill have to pull over at the Texaco in town."

I nodded and a few minutes later we were parked outside the gas station. I didn't realize when Bill left to fill up his jeep that I would be trapped alone in the car with Eric. It suddenly got very hot the minute the door clicked shut on Bills side. I felt like I couldn't breathe and moved to slide out and join Bill for a minute when Eric replied gently.

"I don't bite Sookie."

My eyes fluttered in reaction to the way he said my name and I dared to look back at him and insisted…

"I didn't say you did."

Eric smiled to himself and he looked out the window as if already losing interest he replied nonchalantly…

"Suit yourself, if you want to leave, leave."

I studied him for a long moment trying to get a read on him because he wasn't like any other person I met before. And I finally asked him point blank…

"Why are you here?"

He turned back around to face me his crystal blue eyes doing strange and wondrous things to my insides and he finally replied…

"I'm here to tour the town and get to know my house mate better."

I rolled my eyes knowing full well most likely what his version of getting to know someone was and I replied under my breath…

"Yeah I bet."

I thought I saw him smirk but I wanted to get to the point and not dwell on why he wanted me to think he was here…

"I meant why are you really here? Why did you just decide to one day to leave wherever you came from and shack up with an old woman and her granddaughter in this Podunk town?"

He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment and for some reason I held my breath awaiting his reply, but he simply shook his head, looked down at his hands and he replied honestly…

"I needed some time away, to get a little perspective and take a break from things, this place sounded like a good escape."

"I don't understand why someone would just up and leave their life." I confessed point blank and he looked at me asking casually…

"What's to understand?"

"Haven't you ever just wanted to take some time for yourself, to go somewhere or do something different?"

He paused for a moment and looked out the window, at what I didn't know, but his silence made me uncomfortable and curious at the same time. I looked at him in question suddenly seeing a different side of Eric. There was pain and hurt behind his eyes and dare I say fear. In the short time I had known him, and I hadn't known him long but this was something deep, that he held close to his heart. I was dying to know what it was but he just shrugged his shoulders and I knew neither of us were prepared to go there yet. Besides even if we had, that was when Bill opened the door and slid back in pushing me back towards Eric.

It was a long night but not entirely as agonizing as I thought. With a few beers in him Bill had loosened up a little. He still felt the need to toss his 200 cents into competing with Eric every chance he got. I didn't care really until he decided to involve me in his little scheme. When losing the pool game to Eric for the 3rd time in a row Bill shoved me against the wall and kissed me hard, informing Eric that at least I was his. Normally I would have thought this could be quite the turn on, but even I could tell he was marking me, and I didn't like the speculation we were becoming. Finally after a few more drinks, Eric was the one who ended up driving both of us home. I was really turning into a lush, I thought. But at least it meant another night without having to deal with Bills raging sexual urges.

We helped Bill inside his house and walked him over to his couch. I didn't think I could make it up his stairs with him and Eric wasn't about to play Rhett to my drunken boyfriend so we left him there to sleep it off.

I stumbled a few times back out to the jeep, and Eric suggested I try to walk it off. At first I thought he was crazy, but my house was just a mile up the road and I realized Bill would be a lot less cranky if his jeep was in his own driveway when he woke so I finally agreed. There were two ways we could go back. The long way by the road, or a short cut through the cemetery.

By this time I was desperate for my warm soft and welcoming bed so I opted for the cemetery route even though it was pretty dark and some might say creepy. Although I had grown up here all my life so it wasn't creepy to me, in fact it made me feel like a kid again to sneak around this place at night.

I felt free and giddy when I recognized the familiar song of the frog, toad, and cricket choir. Smiling I started to run, daring Eric to catch me when I stumbled over an embedded stone, taking a rough tumble down into the dirt floor under me.

"Sookie are you alright?" Eric asked rushing up to me from behind. When I looked up at him I saw two of him and then started to laugh.

"You have a twin." I mused.

The next thing I knew I was being lifted up into his arms and those blue eyes were flashing with mine.

"I think you're drunk." He replied.

I smiled and buried my nose into his neck getting lost in his scent and replied coyly…

"Maybe just a little." I confessed and giggled against his hard chest. I studied his face as he walked, noting the serious and stern tick of his jaw and I asked him jokingly…

"Are you always this serious?"

He looked back at me as we passed by grave marker after grave marker and he answered truthfully…

"No, just the opposite in fact."

I smiled thinking that was true for me too, except the other way around, and I confessed…

"I never get drunk you know…In fact last week, the night I met you actually was my first time…it was my first time with a man too."

He stopped in his tracks and looked back at me pausing in confusion he finally asked me for clarification…

"You mean you were a virgin up until last week?"

Suddenly I felt very self-conscious, my face heating up with embarrassment feeling like that freakish little girl all over again because I knew I had said too much. Oh god why did I have to open my mouth.

And I looked down feeling very dizzy all of the sudden I asked him…

"Can you set me down now?"

But he was still looking at me in that ungodly way and I asked him again meeting his hard gaze…

"Eric, set me down!"

He finally did as I asked but as my feet hit the soft moss below my legs wobbled like weeping willow branches, and I stumbled back. Eric reached out to catch me but he lost his footing and although I was now being pulled back in the right direction neither of us could balance and I fell forward collapsing right on top of him, knocking him down as well.

My knees skid against the moss and I knew there would be dirt marks but at the time my dirty knees were the farthest things from my mind.

"Are you okay?" I asked him, feeling suddenly more sober as the fall shook me out of my haze.

"Yes." He replied in caution jerking back as I examined the scrape on his forehead.

"You might be bleeding." I replied in concern, unaware that my bosom was practically shoved in his face, but despite it finding myself quite comfortable in this position for a moment. It was nice to be lower to the ground, where the world wasn't spinning so fast.

"Ill be fine." He replied quickly, and I looked into his eyes to see if he meant it or was just hiding his pain, but I needed a better look, because the lighting out here totally sucked.

"Eric let me see, its too dark and you're not holding still." I ordered trying to adjust my position as I straddled, adjusted my position rocking over his lap, and he assured me quickly…

"Really, I'm fine, we should be getting back to the house…(And that's when I felt it, a pressure under my cotton panties pushing up hard against his tight denims. There was no mistaking his rising desire for me.

Now mind you I'm a lady and I had never even contemplated this predicament in my wildest fantasies, nor would I acted on it had I been sober. But there was something about him, something deep in those blue eyes that entranced me and took over my mind and body that kept me teetering on the fence between being righteous and a total deviant.

I felt over come with the need to grind over him, as my sex hungered for him and my lips thirsted.

"Sookie." He gasped as I leaned over him once more feeling things I had never felt before, pausing for just a moment too long, beyond what was accidental, but there was a yearning that had risen from deep inside. I couldn't help it; I bent down and pressed my lips against his. I felt a rush of blood flow through my body and shivered as I felt his manhood press into me harder.

I boldly dipped my tongue into his mouth and felt his tongue slide against mine. I never wanted anyone so badly, ready to pull my dress off over my head and rip his denims off so we could both be free from our confines. But then he put both of his large hands on my shoulders stopping and pushing me back and he proclaimed sternly…

"Sookie, I can't do this with you, not like this, not when you're drunk."

I stiffened. To say his words felt like a slap in the face was an understatement. Had I not been embarrassed before I don't know if it was possible to turn even redder but it was. Finding every ounce of strength I pushed myself off him and got up. I felt ashamed and traitorous for what just conspired between us. He must think I'm such a child, I realized. A child harlot, I concluded feeling the tears well in my eyes I stumbled a few steps, as my head began to spin and I thought about the terrible thing I had done, to myself and to Bill of all people.

He didn't deserve this, or me for my slutty behavior. I heard Eric call out my name behind me and then I made for a full on sprint towards the house. I had to get away from him, from this awful evening, from the shame, from all of it.

Only that was easier said than done.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: **Thanks again to all my wonderful reviewers and for reading. Still pushing ahead at full steam. Ive decided to just concentrate on this fiction before I tackle 'Written In Blood' so at least that means The Birth of Eve updates will be faster. ;) Thanks again and hope you enjoy this chapter. It's got some nice eye candy. ;)

_**Chapter 3-Nightmares and Dreamscapes**_

The long shower helped clear my head and I decided in the morning I would go to Eric and offer him an apology. I was drunk after all and I wasn't myself. I would beg him to keep this between us and then I would go make things right with Bill no matter what it took. If he wanted me to stay over night at his house, I would.

But all those thoughts disappeared when I closed my eyes and felt the hot angry pellets of water pounding against my back. I closed my eyes for just a minute and saw Eric standing there watching me. It was in my imagination of course, but that didn't stop my body from reacting to it.

I knew by that point I was going to have a very long night. I woke up to the sound of a dog barking outside. My body chilled and aching from what was probably the best sex dream of my life, followed by another dream portraying my wedding to Bill where I was put on trial during our vows, and humiliated in front of the entire town for what I had done. It was chilling to say the least. So relieved when I realized it was just a dream, it definitely brought things home knowing what I needed to do. Last night never happened and I had to patch things up with Bill of course. I got up to go look out my window. I saw my Gran pull away in her old pick up truck and wondered just where she was going.

About 15 minutes later after dressing and covering myself from head to toe, even in the July summer, I made my way downstairs. I was very careful to be especially quiet outside Eric's room, not even sure how I was going to face him today, or if I even wanted to.

Wasn't there a way I could avoid him for the next few months? Maybe we could work out shifts, I could take the day and he could take the night shift, and then we'd never have to see each other. I wondered.

I mulled over in my head what had transpired last night for the five thousandth time and realized I felt bad enough, it was a stupid slip up that would never have happened had I not been drunk and I deserved a free pass with my moral conscience for this one little mistake.

Reaching the kitchen I saw my Gran's note on the counter.

_"Sookie, I went to the grocery store to get milk and eggs, help yourself to grits and fruit. Be back soon.-Love, Gran"_

I sighed feeling bad that my Gran was going to the grocery store by herself. I usually helped with that, but she was trying to prove to me that she could manage this place by herself. It still made me feel uneasy though. I liked doing those things for her.

I went over to the stove and put on a pot of water for the grits, and then cut up some fruit from the fridge. I figured Eric was sleeping in so I made him a bowl too. I didn't want to be inhospitable after all. Plus I knew Gran would give me hell if she found out I didn't make him anything.

Since Eric wasn't up and it looked like it was going to be another sweltering Louisiana day, I thought I would take a stroll around the property. I rarely had time to myself these days and figured I could use it to clear my head and get some fresh air. I still had a small headache from last night so I hoped being outside would do me some good.

One step outside and I realized it was ridiculous to be wearing a sweater and my heavy fleece pajama pants so I went back up to my room and changed into a tank top and my daisy dukes. I figured by the time Eric was up my Gran would be back and have him fast at work, so I took the risk.

Rather than walking through the cemetery, and risking repeating memories of last night, to which it had taken me all morning to compartmentalize and store away by way of lock and key way way deep back in my head, I opted to take the eastern side which skirted around a small wooded grassy area and ended up by our lake. We even had a small rowboat, which I liked to take out on occasion. Not sure if that was something I wanted today, but I was hoping the scenery would offer me some inner peace at the very least.

So I put on my flip-flops and headed down towards the lake. I wondered to myself whether or not Bill was up by now. It wasn't even 8am yet, so I figured most likely not. I knew for a fact he was a late sleeper because he never called me until after noon to schedule dates.

I sighed still not quite sure what to do about everything. Maybe the answer was-nothing, I thought.

Finally I made it to the lake and kicked off my flip-flops so I could wade in the water. It felt cool on my feet, scratch that, it felt like heaven. I could tell we were going to have another blisteringly humid day, wondering if I could just skip work and hang out here all day, I began to lift up my tank top realizing a swim would be nice when I spotted a pair of denims off to the side.

I looked around wondering if anyone was here with me, or possibly down the shoreline a bit further, but I couldn't see anyone, and figured it must have just been some kids messing around last night when all of the sudden I heard a splash.

My head turned to the side and I stepped back startled. It was like a scene right out of a movie. The morning sun was glistening on the water, in dark silhouette like a phoenix rising from its watery grave, Mount Eric erupted from the calm water like Poseidon himself in all of his glory, wearing absolutely nothing but his birthday suit, completely and totally stark naked.

My mouth dropped open as the water poured down his body, following every contour and curve, the level of the water where he submerged just high enough to reach his mid thigh. And like a train wreck I couldn't help but stare even though I knew I was going to hell in a handbag after this.

His size was dare I say very impressive, but that sculpted ass...I nearly melted on the spot. I mean what could you really do in a situation like this but marvel right? Still to say he was a surprise, an overwhelming surprise, one I certainly wasn't prepared for at all would have been an understatement.

"Morning." He finally replied pulling me out of my stupor and I looked back at him mouth still agape at a loss for what to say.

And then he began to approach me and I backed up instinctively. Now that the sun was to the side of him I could see everything. He really did look like one of those famous paintings one would see in a museum, perhaps a DaVinci, or Michelangelo, or Botticelli.

I bit my lip suddenly apprehensive because he was coming dangerously closer to me with that lethal smirk plastered across his face and he added...

"You should come in, the water feels amazing."

"Um I don't think so." I replied still in shock, and quickly skirted back towards the sand to recover his pants.

"Here, put these on, I'm sorry to have disturbed you."

I answered flinging the jeans at his chest still unable to look at him in the eye and then I turned to leave.

"Wait, Sookie?"

Closing my eyes I didn't want to turn around afraid he would see how red I had become, plus I wanted to avoid him today, but that was clearly easier said than done, finally looking over at him in question knowing this was inevitable, I replied…

"What?"

He asked me stepping closer...

"How are you feeling?"

I knew he was testing the waters, but all I could think was how could I possibly have this conversation now, when he was standing right in front of me, all of his glory on display?

"Eric why don't you put your pants back on and then I can tell you how I'm feeling."

I suggested my eyes flicking down before I met his gaze. He simply smirked; clearly pushing my buttons in more ways than one, and finally obliged my request…

"I apologize, I didn't think anyone would be out here so early...I guess we both wanted to get away for a bit and found the same place." Eric offered.

I turned around to hide the heat rushing through me once again reminding me of those dreams, but worse yet, my dreams couldn't even compare to the real deal.

After a long moment with my hands on my hips in frustration I asked him cautiously...

"Are you decent?"

He laughed his twinkling stare blinding me as I dared to look at him and he replied...

"That depends on who's asking."

I closed my eyes in relief that he was now fully clothed, but that didn't help my vivid imagination as the drops of water clung to his perfectly sculpted chest in suspended beauty. I took a deep breath knowing if I wanted to do this, to confront him, I would have to center myself, and I got down to business, replying...

"Eric, I'm really sorry about last night, obviously I had too much to drink and...and.."

"Why should you be sorry?" He interrupted me and took a step closer forcing that frog back into my throat again I swallowed looking up into his penetrating stare, which demanded nothing less than my complete honesty, and I shook my head confused I replied...

"Because I acted inappropriately? I mean I have a boyfriend." I corrected myself and then I looked up and there was that smug smirk again, which was really starting to annoy me.

"You shouldn't be sorry for acting out what came naturally to you, I just didn't want to take advantage of you while you were drunk." He answered.

Okay that did it, if I wasn't pissed before I was pissed now. Of all the arrogant condescending egotistical things to say and I argued sharply my voice raising just a pitch...

"It didn't come naturally to me, it was the alcohol, and if you had taken advantage of me I would have kicked you to kingdom come."

"If that's what you want to believe." Eric replied smugly, his tee was buried in his pocket and he was using it to dab drops of water away from his chiseled jaw and that rock hard torso. _Oh Christ!_ I thought wondering which one of us would be welcomed into hell first.

"Its not what I believe, its the truth, you forget I work at a bar, where there are drunk people, I see them do all kinds of crazy stuff that they would never do while sober!"

Eric smiled tucking the tee back into his waist like a wipe rag and he replied surely...

"I like to call it liquid courage, see the alcohol just makes you do something you would never have had the courage to do, but you wanted to do it underneath it all."

"That is the biggest crock of bull puckey I've ever heard," I argued, and he leaned into me. All I could do was stare at him like a deer caught in the headlights and he whispered...

"Maybe I can prove it then?"

His hand came up to stroke my cheek. I felt the heat flush into my thighs once more and then my legs turned into melted butter and he smiled his eyes flashing down to my nipples which were now pushing blatantly through my tank to prove his point, and my face turned a deep shade of crimson red feeling all of the sudden like I was being cornered my lid almost ready to pop off.

"Go to hell!" I spat back, thinking him the biggest pig that ever lived once more and then stormed off back towards the house so mad I felt like I could spit.

Thankfully when I got back my Gran had returned and I helped her put away the groceries and then I went over to see Bill before work.

I was also thankful Bill didn't remember much of what happened the night before, but he did remember Eric kicking his ass at pool, which rekindled his intense dislike for him. Then Bill asked me again when he was going to leave. He even went so far as to suggest I stay with him while Eric was living at Gran's, but there was no way I would leave her all alone, with Eric's help or not.

* * *

By the time I got home from work I wanted to do nothing more than collapse on the couch. It was well after midnight so when I got home I certainly didn't expect Gran and Eric to be in the living room watching old Buffy reruns and laughing together.

_On what planet was I on again?_ I wondered looking at both of them strangely and my Gran noticed me come in and welcomed me with a beaming smile…

"Oh Sookie darling, how was work?"

I looked back from her to Eric again confused, because I never in a million years pictured my Gran watching Buffy reruns, with Eric of all people, and I replied hesitantly…

"It was fine, the usual crowd, Laffey got in a fight with one of the customers who had complained about his cooking again, but Sam threw him out and the rest of the night was fight free."

"Oh lord!" My grandmother exclaimed finishing off her glass of beer. I had to do a double take cause yes she was drinking beer! And she shook her head and replied in empathy…

"I don't know how that poor boy deals with those idiots day in and day out, Sam Merlotte must have the patience of a Saint."

I nodded my head and then the credits began to roll on the current episode they had been watching and my Gran announced…

"Well I'm going to get some shut eye! You two enjoy yourselves (she looked back at Eric and replied…) Thanks for the company Eric, I had a great time, and thanks for fixing up the siding too."

"It was my pleasure Mrs. Stackhouse." Eric replied and she waved her hand cutting him off she insisted,"Now you stop that, it's Adele, unless you want me to start callin you Mr. Northman again."

Eric smirked and I looked outside to see if there was a full moon tonight or something, but Eric simply replied…

"Good night Adele."

She smiled and replied…"Good boy."

And then she came over to me and she insisted…"I got some ice cream at the grocery store earlier today, help yourself in the freezer." She smiled and kissed me on my cheek and I replied with a smile in kind…

"Thanks Gran."

She smiled back at me and had just reached the stairs when she stopped again and turned around like she had just remembered something…

"Oh and Sookie dear, I'm going to head over to Maxine Thortenberry's Monday morning. We're going down with the church to help feed the Habitat for Humanity volunteers in Haiti, Ill be gone for two weeks."

"What?" I asked her caught off guard. This was the first I had heard about any trip to Haiti. And when did my Gran get her passport? This was so sudden! Not entirely sure if I liked this idea and she just simply waved me off and explained…

"Don't worry, Eric has a list of things to do to keep him busy and you know what your assignment is. (Her eyes twinkled as she glanced over at me, and she continued…) So have a nice night you two, don't let the bed bugs bite."

I smiled uncomfortably and then glanced at Eric. He had remained strangely quiet while my grandmother had been talking. All I could think was we would be stuck together in this house for two whole weeks after tomorrow night. _What could be worse?_

"Are you going to bed too?" Eric asked me after my Gran was gone, breaking the spinning thoughts in my head and I looked back at him in confusion.

"What?"

He stood up while awaiting my response and he explained…

"I just wanted to finish up this DVD, but if you are going to bed, Ill turn it off so the noise doesn't disturb you."

I looked back at him strangely, remembering the last time I saw him today he was naked and suggesting that I came onto him. It still pissed me off. Being reminded of his arrogance I turned on my heel and replied sharply…

"No I'm not going to bed, I'm going to get some ice cream."

I went into the kitchen to pull whatever ice cream my Gran had purchased out of the freezer, happy to see she had gotten my favorite, 'Strawberries and cream' when I heard a voice behind me…

"Rough day?"

I looked back at Eric and rolled my eyes not really in the mood to talk to him. I had enough bull shit for the day and replied honestly…

"Same crap different day."

He moved towards me and I stiffened on guard but reached past me to grab the chocolate sauce.

"Strawberry's my favorite." He smiled grabbing a bowl for himself as well.

I looked at him oddly not thinking of Strawberry and chocolate but it sounded good so I poured some on my dish as well.

And then Eric replied…

"You know I happen to have connections, you shouldn't have to feel stuck at that place, I'm sure you could get at least double what you're making now."

I glared back at him thinking he had some nerve to tell me what I should do for a living and replied sharply…

"It's not about the money for me…Sam is a great boss, its hard to find good people these days."

I looked back at Eric to see if he had gotten my message, and it appeared that he did because he didn't say anything else, drawing back into himself.

And then of course I felt guilty for lashing out. Desperately needing to break the tension we walked back into the living room. I made sure to take the couch opposite him and finally asked him as Buffy resumed…

"So where are you from anyway, I can tell you aren't from around here?"

I knew nothing of the world, but he definitely had a European accent, it wasn't really detectable unless he spoke out, thinking it was possibly Dutch or Danish, I had no idea.

"I was born in Sweden." He replied licking the chocolate off his spoon and I suddenly found myself fixated on his tongue.

"Oh really?" I replied pretending to be more interested in his words, and he nodded…

"Yes, I was sent over here to live with my aunt and uncle when I was 16."

I looked back at him thoughtfully and replied…

"That must have been hard to leave all your friends behind."

He looked at me and I swore I had just caught a glimpse of child Eric, innocent, naive, vulnerable, like his whole world had been crushed in one day and he found out that Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy were all made up, but he willed it away for my sake and Eric finally replied…

"In my life I have learned not to get too attached, it ends with more pain than good."

Making it clear that he was done on the subject Eric changed the subject quickly…

"I never knew they could get so much off that terrible movie, but this really is an entertaining show.

I realized he was trying to defer the topic not so subtly. But I couldn't blame him. I had lost my parents as well. In a car accident that took them both away from me on the same night. It wasn't something I liked to talk about, especially with strangers. After listening to Eric talk about attachments, it strangely made me want to know more though. I wondered what happened to him, or his parents, and I wanted to know what caused him so much pain that he couldn't bear to talk about it, realizing we both had something in common. We were both raised by outside family, and something emotional stirred inside me. Something deep down inside.

I sat back and put some ice cream on my spoon and replied gently…

"My parents died when I was 8, maybe that's why we can identify with Buffy, she grew up in a non traditional home too."

Offering him a small smile in peace, Eric smiled back at me sadly and we enjoyed the rest of the show.

Eric was right, strawberry and chocolate was a good combination and before long I was yawning and ready for bed.

I had expected for Eric to make some crack about last night or some backhanded comment about my behavior, but he didn't, which surprised me. I said goodnight and made my way up to my room and went to bed.

I wondered how it was possible to be so magnetized to someone after knowing them for only two days. I thought about how unfair it was to Bill, and vowed to myself that I would spend more time with him tomorrow.

Right after I indulged in my new favorite dream fantasy, a reenactment of that delicious midnight kiss, and more. After all my thoughts were my own. What other people didn't know couldn't hurt them right?

Of course I came to regret that decision and even feel guilt once morning came. My Gran woke me up before dawn even and informed me that she heard from one of the neighbors that Bill had been a victim in a drunk driving accident. My heart panicked as familiar fears rose to the surface again after all those years of my parents meeting their fatal end the same way. I refused breakfast and even a ride from my Gran jumping into my little yellow Gremlin and sped to the hospital.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN:** Okay I feel bad because this is sort of a filler chapter and a Bill heavy chapter, so if you read up quickly and promise to swear on your mothers eyes that you will continue to read, Ill put Chapter 5 up tomorrow. Lots more happens in Chapter 5. ;)

Hehe, blackmailing and kidding aside, thanks again to all my readers and for those who take the time to review, throws kisses out. Thank you. xoxo Feeding the writers is always a good thing. :D

Okay, here we go.

_**Chapter 4-Crossroads**_

Luckily Bill's injuries weren't that serious. They just asked him to stay over night for observation incase he had a severe concussion, but it turned out it was just a mild one. And thankfully he only escaped with a few minor scrapes and bruises. His jeep on the other hand didn't hold up so well. I was just so relieved he was okay, I offered to stay with him all day. I even called in to work to tell Sam I was taking the day off to tend to Bill.

My Gran came by that morning to check up on us, and right before Bill was about to be released later that afternoon, I saw Eric come in. My pulse quickened as he walked towards me, wondering what he came here for.

I instantly felt guilty again, thinking if I had been with Bill last night and not hanging out at home with Eric, fantasizing about him, and that kiss again, Bill might not be here.

"How is he?" Eric asked meeting me at the end of the corridor, and I nodded my head looking down at my hands awkwardly…

"He's fine, the doctor is filling out his discharge papers right now."

I quickly looked up at him not sure what reaction to prepare for because I didn't expect Eric to be here of all places. I looked around for his doctor or a nurse to latch onto because I felt like a bad girlfriend for leaving Bill so long.

"And how are you?" He finally replied not allowing me any time to dwell, his hard look forcing my gaze up into his deep blue eyes. He actually looked concerned to my surprise.

"I'm good." I breathed nodding my head, still needing to convince myself of that fact I explained to him…

"I took today off work and am going to stay with Bill while he recovers."

He creased his brows and looked down at the floor. I thought he might ridicule me, and trust me when I say I was in no mood for berating, but he only asked me…

"Is there anything I can do to help? Do you need me to pick up his car or bring some of your clothes over to his house?"

I looked up at him in my melancholy haze suddenly having the strangest feeling inside.

I imagined Eric and Bill had switched places and Eric had been in the car accident instead of Bill, and that thought took some of the edge off this stressful morning. I knew it wasn't because I wanted to see Eric hurt or more deserving of the pain. As much as I wanted to deny it, I realized I thought of it because I selfishly wished it was Eric I was taking care of.

I closed my eyes knowing I would surely go to hell for thinking such things. Especially after all Bill had gone through, I wanted to go home with Eric? I was Satan in a Sunday hat, pure evil, like the serpent in the garden of Eden. Shaking my head and looking down at my feet once more I whispered…

"No I'm fine."

I had to do this alone and without help. I had to make up for my sins.

Suddenly I felt Eric wrap his arms around my small frame and hold me to him, making me feel safe and secure in his embrace. I could feel his heart pounding against my cheek and I was thankful for him, even though I know we didn't always see eye to eye and I didn't deserve his compassion, I was thankful. I closed my eyes and just for a moment imagined everything was okay and I was where I was supposed to be. Just for a moment.

"Ahem?" I heard a voice from off to the side interrupting my bliss and I looked over and saw the nurse standing there with her clipboard.

"He is ready to go."

She looked back from me to Eric in question, my arms still clasped tightly around his body and I finally pulled back and nodded my head announcing…

"Thanks, Ill be there in just a moment."

"Do you want me to help you get him in the car?" Eric asked and I shook my head…

"No, Ill be fine, besides if he sees you it might upset him." I added truthfully.

Eric nodded his head in acceptance trying to lighten the mood he replied…

"True, but then he might injure himself again and you wouldn't have to stay with him in that dingy old house where he's probably got spiders and rats bigger than you are."

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Eric had brought a small smile to my face. It was true, Bills house could definitely use a woman's touch. I guessed it was older than this town, and he was too busy with me and his internet business to keep it up-to-date. I replied taking his hand for just a moment, not aware of the small gesture but it was strange how naturally it came and I remarked…

"Thanks for the offer, but Ill take my chances."

He smiled back warmly, squeezing my hand gently, he replied…

"Well if you need anything, you just have to ask, I could even bring a shovel for your protection."

He smirked and for some reason I felt something flutter in my stomach. His gaze lingered on mine for a moment and then finally he blinked and replied softly…

"I'm glad to hear he is doing better…Take care of yourself Sookie."

He smiled and then turned away, but before he did I called back to him…

"Eric?"

He turned around and looked at me those striking blue eyes holding me under his spell and I finally concluded…

"Thanks for coming."

"Any time." He replied with a smile, and a blink, and then he was off.

The rest of the afternoon I spent cooking and cleaning for Bill. The time we spent together wasn't what I would call quality, but he let me read to him and before he drifted off to sleep he told me that he loved me. I wish I could say his confession had me bouncing off the walls, but I felt more relieved that he was finally going to sleep. Still, I knew I loved him. We were just going through a rough patch right now. We'd work it out. Being the faithful girlfriend, or at least devoted girlfriend I was, I stayed the night. Luckily I had some spare clothes in my car. I always had spare clothes to change out of after my work shift, so since I didn't go into work, I reaped the benefits of thinking ahead.

In the morning, Bill was still groggy but he was able to get up and walk around. While I was making breakfast I even caught him playing pro golf on his Wii, so I knew he was on the mend.

It was Monday and I was sure I missed my Gran, already feeling slightly disappointed for not getting to say goodbye to her I told Bill I had to run home before work.

"I wish you would reconsider my offer to stay here with me." He replied as I finished putting away the dishes and I shook my head and answered…

"You know how I feel about that."

He sighed and nodded his head coming up behind me he nuzzled his lips into my neck and replied with a low growl intending foreplay…

"Yes, I do, but that won't stop me from trying."

He put his hand on my breast, alerting me to his speedy recovery. I knew it was only a matter of time. One thing led to another and before I knew it I was getting dressed again, this time pulling my tousled hair up into a tight pony tail.

He tried to convince me to stay longer but I knew what that would lead to, and I had to get ready for work soon.

It was different from the first time I have to confess, lets just say I was naïve to the desires of man, oral desires, and Bill reasoned that it wasn't really sex that way, just having fun, which he wanted both of us to have. I couldn't argue with him, he had a hell of a night and it was the least I could do as his girlfriend. In a way relieved that we didn't have to conduct in intercourse again because after all the emotional turmoil from last night I wasn't prepared to deal with the stress of it all. When he came I felt like it was a job well done and I made him lunch before I left.

I kissed him goodbye and before I left Bill proclaimed…

"Don't worry Sookie, I have a feeling after our date tonight you will be a very happy woman."

He smiled at me and I smiled sheepishly in return asking him what he had in mind for our date, but he wouldn't tell me any more. Just to be ready after work. I nodded my head and made my way home

I wished I could say spending time with Bill and having oral sex with him made me feel better or at least alleviated my conscience a little, but I felt even more twisted inside. I hoped wherever Eric was, I didn't run into him before my shift.

When I got home I hadn't found Eric but I did find Jason in his usual spot inside the kitchen raiding our fridge.

"What's wrong did the grocery store run out of food?" I asked catching him stuffing his face with leftover pecan pie. He just smirked, wiped his hand off on his jeans and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

"Nice to see you too sis."

I rolled my eyes, just wanting to go to my room, but I figured I needed to play nice and catch up with my brother. I hadn't seen him for a few days and finally he replied…

"So what's the story on Thor?"

I followed Jason's gaze out to the backyard where Eric had just come out of the tool shed carrying some 2 by 4's for siding. I swallowed feeling that pain and unsettling pit again and I shook my head as if there was nothing to tell and explained…

"He's just staying here for a few months to fix up the house, it was all Gran's idea."

"And where is he stayin?" Jason asked puffing his chest out as he looked out into the backyard. I couldn't help but role my eyes at his pathetic male macho territorial bull crap and I answered sharply, knowing this would really get under Jason's skin…

"In your room actually."

Jason scoffed, rolling his eyes he remarked glaring back at Eric after taking a swig of his beer…

"He better not be fuckin his girlfriend in there, that's all I gotta say."

I shook my head and eased his pathetically aching conscience explaining…

"I don't think he has a girlfriend."

Jason looked back at me and scoffed, then smirked replying smartly…

"You could have fooled me…I saw him kissin some hot blonde just as I was pullin up the driveway, and when I say hot, I mean smoking, man the legs on this girl, and the tits up to…"

"Jason!" I cut him off suddenly feeling sick to my stomach. I didn't want to hear any more. Eric had a girlfriend now? And a hot blonde too boot? No wonder he didn't want to talk about his history with me. He probably had a whole line up of women just waiting for him to chase after them, or maybe a bad break up and didn't want to revisit or burden me with an explanation.

"Well she was hot, man I need to ask him for some tips on how to catch tail as fine as that."

By that time I had tuned Jason out, I couldn't hear him any more, let alone my own thoughts which kind of all blended together into one big grumbled blurb.

I looked out the window and watched him cut away at the wood feeling a sense of great sadness and dread. I wondered about my life and where it was going. I felt like I was at a cross roads and if I didn't chose the right path, I would regret it for the rest of my life.

But right now, I didn't have a choice, I had to go to work. Unfortunately if I thought the day had started off bad, I underestimated the power of the fates. I knew Bill's promise would come back to haunt me and when I finished with my shift at Merlottes, I found out just what he meant when he said he was going to make me a very happy woman, and the irony did not escape me.

As promised, Bill took me on an amazing date. He pulled out all the stops, dinner at a French bistro, some dancing and a moonlit stroll afterwards around his property. When we got to the house, to his back porch, he got down on one knee and I knew what was coming.

"Sookie, you are the love of my life, I never thought Id find love again after I lost Sarah but you proved me wrong. My accident yesterday only cemented the fact that we are meant to be together, forever. I wanted to do this outside my house, my home, the most important thing to me because you are my home Sookie, and I want to share it with you."

My eyes started to well up and I felt tears creep out from under the surface. An overwhelming feeling of anxiety and dread washed over me as he continued.

Bill took my hand and he took a box out of his pocket, slid out the ring and slipped it on my finger.

"Sookie, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

The tears flowed more freely now and I lifted the ring up to look at it in the moonlight.

"Bill." I muttered wondering why he chose this moment and this day of all days to do this. Wasn't this every woman's dream? This was supposed to be my dream too. Bill was a good man and I knew he would be a wonderful husband and father. I looked out past his property searching for a sign, any sign. The moon was full and the night was warm and airy, but I felt like I was suffocating.

'What do you say Sookie?" He asked me in earnest his blue eyes shining as he looked up at me, but all I could do was cry and then I turned away from him and put my face in my hands.

He stood up and went over to me and asked…

"Sookie, what is it? That wasn't exactly the reaction I was hoping for."

I finally wiped away what tears I could and turned to him after taking a deep breath pleading with him…

"Bill I just need a little time, is that okay? Can you give me some time?"

I wanted so desperately to say yes, yes I wanted to marry him, but something was holding me back, fear, anxiety, that pit in my stomach…

"I don't understand." He turned around to face me and I looked up at him pleadingly…

"I thought this is what you wanted, this is what we wanted?"

I bit my lip and nodded my head looking down at the ring, I nodded again and finally replied with a gasp feeling at this very moment like the air was leaking out of me…

"It is what I want, I just need time, please Bill, if you love me will you please give me that?"

He looked at me for a moment and I thought I saw hate in his eyes, but as quick as it came, it went, and he finally looked down at his hands and replied quietly…

"All right Sookie."

I went up to him and hugged him, desperate to feel that connection, but I just felt more isolated and as I pulled away I nodded and kissed his cheek knowing he was still upset…

"Thank you…I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Why don't you take a few days to think it over." Bill replied in challenge.

I looked back at him thinking that was fair, but could I really figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life in a few days? The scary part in all of it was, I always thought I would know the moment I met him who I would end up marrying, but now I wasn't so sure.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: **Here you are lovlies, as promised. Hope you likey. Things are starting to heat up now. ;)

_**Chapter 5-Lost and Found**_

To say my life felt like it was being swept away in a hurricane at the moment wasn't much of an understatement. And I had lived through Katrina. I felt bad for comparing my sad little life to such an astronomical tragedy, but at the moment I didn't care. Nothing could have been worse right now. I was terrified and so desperate for some clarity. I had never missed my Gran more than I did now, wishing she was here to comfort and console me.

As I walked back to my house across the cemetery I thought about what a huge mistake I probably just made. About 5 or 6 times I stopped dead in my tracks and thought about going back, but then I felt the pits fall harder and heavier as I gazed upon Bills house. I just prayed he wouldn't hate me now. _Please don't hate me Bill_, I whispered under my breath.

He was the only stable thing I had besides Gran. Jason was off tom catting around the whole of Northern Louisiana, Eric had his girlfriend, or girlfriends plural, who did I have? What if I just threw my life away? What if I gave up the only person who would ever love me?

I couldn't breathe anymore, desperate for the shelter and safety of my home. I needed to feel normal for a little while.

Stepping into a darkened house, despite my bleak thoughts of despair, I was thankful when I realized everyone must be gone. At least someone up there was in my corner, I thought looking out the window at the black night sky.

I went into the kitchen, my hands shaking as I went to fill up the tea pot, knowing the anxiety was churning inside me nearing the surface with every step I made. I was just trying to find some normalcy in my day to day routine but every step I took to lighting the stove, getting out the mug and tea bags, setting the tea pot back on the burner after it was filled with water, every movement weighed heavier and heavier on me until finally I just caved falling prey to the overwhelming anxiety fear and sadness I had felt throughout the entire day.

The worst part being, I had never felt more alone in my life.I was going to die alone._ Alone, alone, alone...._The words echoed in my mind. And in that moment, I felt like there was no way in my entire pathetic small town life, I would ever be happy. I could no longer hold in my sobs, bending over the kitchen sink, my tears fell long and hard, my face red, and I crumbled down to the floor, my weeping face held in my hands as I let it all pour out.

I didn't even hear his voice when he spoke, it was apprehensive and soft, but when he put his hand on my shoulder I shook having been startled, I had no other choice but to look up at him with tear drenched eyes, feeling all the more miserable and lonely because he had found me this way.

"Sookie?"

Eric crouched down beside me and I quickly pulled myself up, not wanting him to see me like this. God to top it all off, the crowning moment of the evening was letting Eric watch my melt down. I searched the counter for the box of tissues my Gran kept close by for when she watched her afternoon soaps.

"Sookie what happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it." I replied shaking my head in denial and attempting to wipe the teary mess off my face.

"Sookie."

He put both of his large hands on my shoulders and I felt my legs shake and tremble under his touch, because I couldn't do this, I didn't want to do this, I wanted to feel numb.

"Just leave me alone." I insisted trying to look away, but it wasn't working because he had me boxed in.

"Sookie, please tell me." He continued trying to coax me out of my angst. I looked up at him slowly and he began to brush the damp blonde hairs away from my forehead offering a gesture of tenderness, to warm my resolution and ensure that there was no escaping him as my eyes were exposed to his gaze, and I creased my brows, shaking my head still unable to speak, he whispered my name again and I raised my hand to show him the ring.

Although I had no idea what his reaction might be to my circumstantial evidence, it was nowhere near what I would have predicted. If I wasn't mistaken I could have been looking in a mirror because I was sure his expression was as crushed and pained as mine was. And he finally asked me dragging his eyes up to meet mine…

"You're engaged to Bill?"

A fresh round of tears along with a choked sob came out when I realized it wasn't true. I wasn't engaged and I would never be engaged. I would probably die alone in this house, with the company of my cat. Finally I shook my head and looked down at the ring, sliding it off my finger I set it on the counter. Attempting to control my shaky voice I answered quietly just above a whisper…

"No…I couldn't do it, not tonight…I asked him for more time, but…but I'm sure he hates me now."

There was a long pause and then Eric spoke gently...

"He couldn't hate you, no one could hate you." Eric replied in earnest the expression on his face still one of pain.

I shook my head not able to believe it. I wasn't a good person, I had to kiss Eric that one time, and look where I was now. Eric had a girlfriend which made me a tramp, Bill most likely didn't want me, I was alone and would always be alone and worst of all, I deserved it.

"You listened to your instincts Sookie, don't you see?" He asked facing me. But I didn't want to talk about it anymore. I just wanted this day to end.

"Eric I don't care okay! I love him and tomorrow Ill go back and tell him I was wrong and pray he takes me back!"

"I don't buy it Sookie, You wouldn't be here crying your eyes out in a darkened kitchen if this is what you wanted. This is killing you inside, your relationship is killing you slowly, and you know it!"

"You don't even know me!" I argued.

"I may not have known you as long as you have known Bill, but I recognize misery when I see it and sweetheart you are miserable, like a bird trapped in a cage, and you want so desperately to get out!"

"Eric just stop it!

"You said you love him, but do you want to marry him???"

"Stop!"

"Do you want to get married Sookie?"

I glared at him but he wouldn't back down and he got in my face all 6 foot 5 of him cornering me against the kitchen sink.

"Eric!" I gasped not wanting him to do this but he stepped even closer, the tension between us seething...

"Do you?"

I frowned, knowing the truth even before he asked the question, looking down at my hands my eyes began to tear up because it made me feel like a terrible person to admit it and I finally confessed in a whisper....

"No."

His face fell in what looked like relief and then I felt the floor fall out from under my feet as he picked me up in his massive arms and his lips crashed against mine. It felt like a thunderstorm, a tsunami, a tornado, and tidal wave all rolled into one when he pulled me off the floor and into his embrace. At first it was confusion, but then as his body took hold of mine and my lips warmed to his I felt consumed by my desire and waves of passion tore through my body. I kissed him back with feverish necessity. Oh god, I needed him, I needed him inside me now. No longer recognizing myself or my actions, my tongue meshed with his and my hands clawed through his hair as he pressed me up against the cupboard and kissed me like Id never been kissed before.

My head bumped the wall and a pan fell down off its hook above the stove landing in a clamor and he had knocked over the tea bag box and my cup and spoon with his hand as he spun me around. I heard a crash behind us my mind tuning the sound out as the beating of my heart deafened my ears. We moved over to the peninsula counter for more space and possibly a little more flexibility as the stack of cooking books toppled on the floor one by one. I wrapped my legs around his waist and then the tea kettle started to whistle. But I didn't care, I didn't care about any of it. My body needed Eric. I wanted Eric. I craved Eric.

His hand came up to caress my aching breast and we were rapidly making our way to 2nd base my pelvis grinding over his ready to take this to 3rd, when I heard a voice over the whistling tea kettle call to me from out near the front entry…

"Sookie?"

"You home girl?"

It took a split second for me to react in my haze still wanting to taste those delicious lips again and then Eric looked up and I knew he heard it too. It could no longer be ignored.

"Sook?"

_Shit_.

I cursed to myself silently, risking a guilty glance at Eric because I was obviously overcome once more, not behaving as myself my was possessed and I wasn't sure how to react after what had just happened between us. I quickly hopped off the counter, reached over to turn off the stove to stop that darn whistling and that's when the light was flicked on exposing us in all of our 'caught red handed' glory.

"Tara!" I squeaked trying to act as pulled together as I could but there was no way in hell I was going to have a believable performance as I pulled my tousled hair back and brushed my fingers over my swollen lips in an attempt to hide further evidence of my earlier actions.

Then I noticed her surveying the damage. It honestly looked like a tornado had hit the kitchen and she asked me reluctantly…

"Y'all hire a demolition crew to redecorate or somethin?"

I laughed uncomfortably and looked at Eric, my body still alive and humming from his touch and I shook my head and quickly went to grab a broom trying to come up with an explanation, at a loss, fumbling nervously...

"We um...um..."

"We were cleaning up the mess from the falling pot, and apparently it took everything down with it like a damn domino effect." Eric explained bending over to give me a hand.

Tara looked back at us awkwardly, watching for a moment in silence, she nodded her head...

"Uh huh..." She replied. I could tell by her tone however that she clearly was still not buying it, but what could we do, what could I do?

I stood up feeling rude about my behavior in front of Tara. It was true, she was one of my closest friends and worked at Merlottes with me, but she was still a guest, and I asked her standing up, in an attempt to be polite and avoid more embarrassment...

"So what brings you here?"

Tara watched me for a moment with a brow still raised in suspicion and I instantly felt a wave of remorse wash over me for lying to her, and for what I had just done. I was certainly going to hell, that was a given.

"I wanted to drop off your uniform, you left it at work. I thought you might have gone to bed, but then I heard the whistling…" She explained handing me my work uniform, her glance appraising me with skepticism...

"Thank you."

I took it from her reluctantly and replied trying to smooth things over, ever so miserably...

"Yes I really aught to learn how to turn the lights on, I can be so clumsy sometimes" I replied digging my grave deeper. I looked back at Eric who was still cleaning up.

"Well I can see that you're busy, so Ill let my self out." Tara concluded.

She cast Eric a surveying glance and I realized I hadn't yet introduced them...

"I'm sorry, where are my manners, Tara this is Eric Northman, he's renting out Jason's room for a few months to help us around the house."

Tara looked at him in intrigue and then smirked at me and held out her hand to Eric, puffing up she replied formally...

"It's nice to meet you Eric...that your car outside?"

Eric raised on brow in such a fashion that made my legs wobble just a bit and then he took her hand and replied with a sincere smile...

"Yes, that's my baby-Little Red Riding Hood."

Tara giggled and she asked him kiddingly...

"You named your car?"

Her gaze dropped down the same way mine did when I first saw him. _What was it about Eric?_ I wondered. I wasn't the kind of girl to check out guys, but after seeing Tara do it I realized that's exactly what I had done. Great, that meant I was attracted to him. Obviously. Just what I needed to make things worse between me and Bill right?

But Eric simply smiled and nodded in reply...

"She's been with me for a long time, longer than any of the lovers I've had." His gaze caught mine for a moment, Tara still obviously enthralled in his story mused...

"So in other words, you prefer your car to a real date?"

Eric smirked again, god why did he have to keep doing that? I wondered finding my gaze fall to his strong jaw, then neck, and as I watched him moisten his lips I found myself fantasizing about those lips on mine once more, and my face grew heated.

"Well that depends entirely on my date."

He risked another glance at me, and I stood up straighter not wanting to be caught staring.

"But generally speaking, loyalty is very important and she's been very loyal."

Tara smirked, and she replied...

"Well loyal or not, a hot car like that cant be wasted parked up here hidin behind a bunch of damn dead white folks, you gotta take her out and I know just the poor unfortunate Podunker's to do that with."

"You do?" Eric replied with mock intrigue and Tara nodded with a knowing smile looking back at me who had found a new fascination with the tightness of Eric's old worn screen print tee.

"What do you say Sook?" Tara asked trying to encourage me to obviously let the hot guy take us out for a spin.

I looked back at Eric and he smiled warmly and I felt my heart melt a little. What was I upset about earlier? In that moment I couldn't remember, I wondered suddenly why life had to be so complicated, and for a brief moment wondered if I had possibly settled too early with Bill.

"Earth to Sookie? Come in Sookie?" Tara replied musingly waving her hand over my eyes.

I looked back at Tara realizing I had been in la la land, hearing her words in the back of my mind I finally nodded and replied…

"Yes, that sounds nice."

Tara flipped her eyes up and she remarked…

"Well I see you've already checked out for the night, so Ill leave you to it so you can get some rest….But you better call me later so we can dish girl."

Tara cast one more glance over at Eric and I knew she wanted to find out the scoop on him. God help me, when she looked at him and smiled flirtingly like she was I wanted to stand in front of him and proclaim…'He's mine bitch!' but I kept my thoughts to myself and smiled, replying…

"Yes, we will definitely have to do that, why don't you stop by tomorrow and we can catch up?"

Tara smiled and nodded in reply and then she looked back at Eric and added…

"Yeah, then maybe we can take that sorry excuse for a lawn ornament out for a real ride."

I smiled and went over to hug her in thanks for bringing my waitress uniform home for me, walking her to the door. And then I went back to the kitchen to help Eric finish cleaning up our mess.

I was still a little embarrassed but he had most of it picked up, and I went to grab one piece of ceramic mug that he had missed when he stood up the same time as me and handed me Bills ring.

"Ah thanks." I replied taking it from him hesitantly. This was so awkward.

It felt strange to have Eric hand me the ring, but I shook it off and turned to pour the hot water into an unbroken mug for tea.

After my long and very grueling and passionate yet confusing evening I just needed some space, what I had wanted all along despite my libido's earlier protest, and I asked him…

"Would you mind if I watch some television…Alone? Maybe catch up on what I missed the other night with Buffy?"

He looked at me for a moment and I knew he understood what I needed was time to get my head twisted on straight and he nodded in reply and before changing upstairs into pj's and then taking my cup of tea to the living room to watch my DVD set, I answered…

"Thank you." I replied with a smile, relieved he wasn't going to push me on this.

It was so cozy curled up on the recliner with my blanket and hot tea I didn't even know I had drifted off until I felt myself being lifted into the helm of two huge arms and pressed against Eric's massive chest. I barely had time to react, still groggy when I realized I was being carried up the stairs to my bedroom.

I opened my eyes to half slits and looked at his bare chest and then to his eyes in question…

"What time is it?" I asked groggily.

"It's just after 3am. The DVD was over and the TV was blaring, I wanted to make sure you were okay." He answered.

I smiled groggily and mused still half awake…

"How thoughtful, you're turning into a regular hero, you know?"

He smiled and replied gently as he got to my room and set me down in my bed…

"I don't know if Id go that far…"

He pulled the covers up over me and leaned in to kiss me goodnight on the forehead, it made me feel safe and secure and just as he rose and was about to turn to leave I replied taking his hand in mind…

"Wait, don't go yet."


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: **Okay Im a little nervous about this one. I took a day to work out the kinks and I dont know if Im still completely satisfied with the end, but I wanted to stop fiddling. I have to add a **cautionary note that this chapter contains some graphic content, both sexual and violent**. So if you are sensitive, especially to the violent content, please feel free to pm me if you have any questions or want me to give you a brief outline of the chapter. I just dont want to offend anyone. It was a hard chapter to write, especially the end, so I hope I dont disappoint. Next chapter is Eric's POV, so theres more to look forward to. Anyway, Ill stop rambling now and just let you read. It's all part of a story and its going somewhere, I promise. :)

_**Chapter 6-Torn**_

"You want me to stay with you?" He asked huskily and I nodded my head reaching for his hand and he took it to my relief.

He watched me for a moment and then slowly raised the covers and slid inside. My bed was only a full so there wasn't much room, but when he got comfortable he propped his elbow on the pillow and turned to me with a smirk on his face.

I had grown to look forward to seeing that smirk on a daily basis I realized in that moment as I looked at him and studied his face and confessed much to my dismay …

"I don't understand why I have such a strong attraction to you, I cant stop thinking about kissing your mouth right now, but I know I can't, it would be wrong."

He studied my face equally enthralled with me as I was with him and he brushed some hair away from my cheek asking me gently…

"Why cant you?"

I bit my lip and looked past him at the ring on my night stand, feeling guilty and unworthy again I admitted, the tiredness forcing my honestly forth…

"Because the first time I kissed you I was drunk, and the second time, I wasn't myself, but if I kiss you a third time, it would mean..."

My voice trailed off as I got lost in his eyes searching for an answer or solution to this little problem we had and Eric paused for a moment.

He creased his brow and I could tell he was thinking about my situation as well, but oddly he didn't seem to act as frustrated as I felt. I had no idea what we were doing or how Eric even saw me, maybe I was just a conquest to him, maybe it was casual, maybe he felt something for me, the bottom line was we both were cheating ourselves and our significant others, and if I kissed him it would definitely mean I had been unfaithful and unvirtuous, so I didn't expect him to suggest what he was about to suggest.

"What if I kissed you? Off the mouth…"

I looked back at him curiously for a moment, feeling tingles run up and down my body in nervous excitement and had to admit I was intrigued. It was a very tempting offer and as his strong warm body wrapped around me I felt more connected to him than anyone else ever in my life.

Guilt passed through my mind for a brief moment when I remembered Bill and I knew I had already dug my grave, my conscience telling me it was wrong and sinful. But then the little voice inside me, the one that represented the little devil on my shoulder was rooting for me to go for it. I almost didn't recognize my voice realizing which side had won the battle when I replied in a quiet whisper…

"Okay."

One side of his mouth curved up in delight and I suddenly wondered what I had gotten into, feeling like I was laying in bed with the Big Bad wolf and he leaned over and kissed my neck. His lips pressed to my warm skin while his calloused fingers brushed my arm and I felt tingles run up and down my body. This was exactly what I needed right now.

I felt his tongue brush against my flesh lightly before he moved to the next spot, which was my shoulder. My breasts perked up and I suddenly remembered I wasn't wearing a bra because I had changed into my pj's, which consisted of a blue tank and my standard pajama pants. But it was too late to back out now. This felt too damn good, I thought as my eyelids fluttered.

His hands brushed the sides of my awakened breasts teasingly and he lifted the hem of my shirt, and kissed my navel brushing his tongue lightly over and inside the indentation of my belly button. I felt my thighs clench in pleasure as I watched him. Then he moved down to the waist of my pants, pushing the blanket aside and folding down the waist slowly, I asked him nervously…

"What are you doing?"

I felt heat flow through my center and drench my panties as he looked up at me and whispered…

"I'm not kissing your mouth."

My head was spinning unsure of what to do, should I object? Even though my body was screaming Yes, yes, yes let him do it!

Bill would never approve of this, but who would think of Bill at a time like this? And Bill did say oral wasn't really sex, oh god, I was so going to hell, in fact I'm sure there was a brass plate with my name over some pile of hot coals down there.

"Stop thinking Sookie."

Eric advised me with that devilish smirk of his and I looked up at him, and realized he was right. I wanted to grow up and become a woman right? Even though this meant nothing emotionally, at least I could some day tell my children I was wild and spontaneous when I was young. I nervously closed my eyes tight, laid my head back on my pillow and spread my legs in reply.

I had never done this. Bill was a believer of oral sex as I had learned earlier, but he didn't believe it went both ways. He was an old fashioned man. But I figured, I really was done with thinking about Bill now, I was going to enjoy myself dammit and enjoy myself I did.

I expected him to kiss my lady parts first, but his mouth found a spot on the inside of my right thigh and he began to suck numbing my skin. His thumb brushed over my sensitive folds causing waves of pleasure to run through me.

When the cool air hit my moist sheath, I felt Eric's warm tongue part my folds and I jerked once, but then relaxed as he began to lick me slowly.

Oh God did it feel good, I thought as he brought his warm hands into the mix stroking my inner thighs with his thumbs, increasing my pleasure. I felt a churning deep inside, and my body shook again when he located an even more sensitive spot with his tongue.

I gasped as his mouth warmed me and then I felt his teeth brush over my center and I shuddered feeling the waves build.

The shocks crested as he hit the spot over and over again and I felt what could only be described as an orgasm as they electric currents split up into tiny sparks and flowed through my blood all the way up from my head to my toes.

"Oh Eric." I moaned wanting him to go faster harder, unable to even recognize time or the conscious world any longer as pleasure rained up and down my body. And then I felt a pressure build as his tongue lashed back deeper his lips claiming that tight sensitive spot and that's when the big explosion happened…

"Eric!"

I cried out as my whole body shook and jerked, but he was relentless holding me in his arms as I quivered under his mouth right there on my bed.

It was the single most devious yet deliciously decadent thing I had ever done in my life and in that moment I didn't regret a second of it as I floated back down to Earth my body feeling more alive now than it ever had.

-----------------

I must have dozed off shortly there after because I couldn't remember much after that, other than I pulled Eric up to sleep along side me craving his warmth and contact and he obliged me, for a little while anyway.

But when I woke up groggily after a nice dream where I had been making out with him, I realized he had gone. His side of the bed was cold to my disappointment and I was left again to wonder about what last night meant for our relationship. _Wait a minute, relationship?_ I had no idea where that thought came from. We didn't have a relationship. Screwing my head back on straight I steered myself back to the most important question, what did that mean for Bill and me?

I felt like no gravedigger in the world could find the right depth for the trench I was creating for myself this time. But strangely as hard as I tried to concentrate on my faults and flaws, I found myself not bothering to care. Whatever last night meant, whatever was going on, my body was still humming with electricity and I couldn't help but want to take advantage of one nice day. One day without worry. Today I was free to do what I wanted. Today I was going to spread my wings and fly.

So I showered, noting as I dressed the lovely heart shaped mark on my inner right thigh from Eric's capable mouth. I shivered again those familiar yearning pangs washing over me. He left me a hickey? I had to giggle to myself wishing there was an appropriate occasion for capturing this moment, but I settled for taking a peek at the hickey whenever I could.

Then I went downstairs deciding I was in the mood to cook us a massive breakfast. To my surprise, Jason also stopped by, well actually he crashed and raided the fridge eating about half the food I made but I couldn't stay mad at him. He mentioned something about the electricity being out in his house because they were doing some work down at the school. So naturally he had to squat in the next available well stocked as in food filled home.

We had gotten to talking when I noticed a groggy Eric coming in. He looked tired, like he had a long night, but apparently my body didn't care feeling butterflies in my stomach. My face lit up and I smiled at him as he moved around me to grab the coffee and I greeted him with a casual smirk, reminded once more of our evening…

"Morning." I replied looking at him through lowered lashes, testing the waters, I handed him a plate and he looked back at me, his eyes crinkled and melted my insides as he answered in a similar flirty fashion…

"Morning."

I smiled to myself daring to look at him sharing a moment, and then Jason had to pipe in and say…

"No one gonna say Mornin to me? (He looked directly at Eric and replied) I hope you enjoyed my bed last night Thor but if I don't have power tonight you might have to sleep on the couch or something."

I had to roll my eyes and I looked back at Jason and replied simply in defense of Eric…

"He will do no such thing, you haven't slept in that room since you were 18 and you're not going to start now. If you want to stay here, you're welcome, but you get the couch brother dear."

Jason sent me a glare and Eric smiled replying cheekily towards Jason's new nickname for him…

"Sorry, I can't argue with her or she would make me wear a Viking helmet all day, you can imagine how that would feel in the heat right?"

I giggled and Jason just looked at him strangely. I could tell the wheels were spinning and Jason was envisioning some sort of horned hat, much like I was, but in my vision Eric wasn't wearing much else. I instantly began to blush at the visual but I didn't say anything more on the subject.

We sat down and ate, and then Tara came over ensuring that Eric make good on his promise to take us all out for a spin we drove in his Corvette with the top down all the way to Monroe. It was the most fun Id had in a long time. Laughing with them as the wind blew through my hair.

We stopped at a crawfish shack for lunch and then grabbed some ice cream in town browsing through the little shops as we finished our cones. First it was antique and I tried on some old hats with Tara while Eric and Jason scouted out the post civil war weaponry.

After that we found ourselves in an adult video store and I blushed when Eric brought me a copy of Dallas eats out Debbie.

I had to give him points for his sense of humor, but at the same time, totally inappropriate. But when I saw Jason go for the anal beads, it was too much. I pulled them all out and concluded that we were done for the day.

Eric drove us back to my house and Tara and Jason were reluctant to leave so I made up a batch of cookies paired with my Grans lemonade and we started to play a game of Texas hold Em.

I wasn't familiar with this version of Poker before so Eric and Jason told me how to play. I was Eric's partner for a couple hands and then I finally got the hang of it and took a hand of my own.

Eric joked that I was a card shark in disguise because I had a knack for the game and I argued…

"I am not!" I swatted his arm and looked back at him coyly replying…

"It's just beginners luck and if you cant take the heat honey get out of the kitchen."

"Oh I can take the heat." Eric argued licking his lips suggestively, he replied ever so not subtly…

"And I feel right at home in the kitchen."

My face heated up when I remembered he was referring to an actual event and it was true, he did make himself right at home. I sent him an accusatory 'your so bad look' and then realized we were being watched as my glance flicked with Tara's bashfully. I knew I was going to get the 20 questions from her soon. Thankfully my brother was oblivious to it all as he asked us…

"Y'all done talkin so I can take your money?"

I rolled my eyes and then Jason slapped down our cards.

"Okay time to ante up."

I took a sip of my drink fully enjoying myself and teasing Eric with my mock disappointment for beating his well-bluffed hand, when I saw Bill standing there in my doorway watching me, and I suddenly jerked up in shock. I had no idea how long he'd been there, which is what made me nervous.

My heart stopped for just a moment, not expecting him to be here, and I nearly choked on my lemonade when I spoke his name…

"Bill? What are you doing here?"

I asked trying to suppress my coughing, surprised to see him, I stood up and walked over to him. He looked at Jason, Tara and Eric seated in the parlor, and his gaze narrowed when Eric looked back at him.

"I wanted to see if you would like to have dinner with me tonight, possibly we could talk somewhere private?"

I saw Bill glance sharply over at Eric again and I asked him confused my head already spinning and anxiety rising…

"I thought you wanted to wait a few days?"

Don't get me wrong, it was nice that Bill wanted to talk about it I had to respect that, but I just wasn't ready. I didn't think I was prepared to face him yet, feeling more puzzled than ever about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life, but he insisted his brows creased in earnestly with those puppy dog eyes…

"I really need to talk to you."

What other choice did I have, Bill was my boyfriend and he wanted to talk reason with me.

So I made my pardons to Eric, Tara, and Jason, and went back with Bill to his house. Like promised Bill had dinner all ready cooked and served. He had made a pot roast with roasted carrots, potatoes, onions and rosemary, served with a nice red wine. I'm sure its every girls dream to have her boyfriend make her dinner, and if I had more of an appetite I'm sure I would have enjoyed it, but my stomach was a bundle of nerves.

Since I wasn't able to drink up, I realized Bill had nearly finished off the whole bottle by himself. Finally after some pleasantries Bill asked me looking down at my hand…

"So you've chosen not to wear my ring?"

I followed his glance down to my exposed fingers pulling them back under the table and looked back at him guiltily…

"I didn't want to get it dirty."

I replied fibbing, not ready to address the topic just yet and he asked me point blank setting down his empty glass of wine and refilling it…

"Are you dating that handy man now?"

I saw a snarl on the tip of his lip and new I needed to tread carefully, but his voice was level and cool and I shook my head…

"No, you know he's just staying with us."

Bill snorted setting down his glass he looked at me with cool eyes and asked me…

"Do you really expect me to believe that Sookie, I wasn't born yesterday, and I see the way you look at him…I cant help but wonder if the reason I'm not getting laid is because you have taken to fucking someone else."

Now I was getting upset because yes, Eric and I had kissed, twice, well I tried to block out last night, but neither one of us had taken it any further, we were careful. Plus I wasn't used to being spoken to in such a disrespectful manner. To suggest that I had been fucking Eric insulted me and I shot back…

"I cant believe you think that of me Bill!"

And that's when he threw down his napkin in anger and shot out of his chair his strong body towering over me and replied…

"I wish I could believe you Sookie, but what else am I supposed to think? You won't even wear my ring in public?"

"What else are you supposed to think?"

I fired back standing up now too, and I glared at him and replied…

"How about a little trust and compassion? Isn't that what couples are supposed to do, trust each other?"

I started to panic, not liking this feeling I was having, it felt all too familiar, and I argued…

"How about giving me some time, like we AGREED?"

I countered defensively. He walked toward me and I looked into his eyes. There was anger and disgust there and it scared me. I swallowed rethinking my approach, maybe I needed to smooth things out and just take charge here and I finally replied…

"Bill I don't want to fight, please let's just go back to our nice meal and have some dessert."

Although, food was the last thing on my mind. He came closer and that's when I felt that consuming trepidation. I no longer wanted to be here, not when he was like this. And he proclaimed…

"It's too late for that, people are talking, a friend told me he saw you off gallivanting in Monroe today with him."

I looked down at my hands, unsure what to say. Upset that he had been spying on me! But, what does the guilty say when they are guilty? And finally I found the nerve to look up at him and he spat at me…

"You're silence tells me everything I need to know."

"Bill."

I argued but it was clear he had already formed an opinion.

"I cant believe you of all people would do this to me Sookie!"

I looked back at him strangely feeling lashed by his stinging words. And then I felt awful, wanting to make it up to him. I had been a bad girlfriend; no scratch that, a horrible one.

"I think its time we get ourselves back on track, unless you want to walk away and pretend like the last 6 months didn't exist?"

He challenged me, and I didn't know what to say or do. I felt so torn.

"No I don't want to pretend."

I concluded, needing to appease him. I looked back at him with remorse, feeling shamed for my actions. I didn't know if I was ready to break up, yes I loved him but then there was Eric, but what were we doing? I didn't know, I just didn't know. Was it worth sacrificing what Bill and I had? I was so confused and then he started to take his shirt off and I suddenly understood. He wanted to have sex.

It was time to stop being so selfish I thought. I had to do this, to make things right, I thought, taking a deep breath. But I could smell the alcohol on his breath and I backed up instinctively. Having second thoughts I suggested sweetly…

"Bill, why don't we do this tomorrow, you look tired."

He snorted and backed me into a corner demanding…

"No we're doing this now, unless you want to end this tonight? Are you going to throw away everything we had Sookie? 6 months of dinners, dancing, dates, and piss all over the only man who ever loved you? Could you live with yourself for turning your back me when I needed you the most?"

I had to admit his words hurt and struck the fear of God into me. I had been there for him after his wife died and about 3 months later we started dating. I knew it still hurt him to think of her, but I tried my best to help him forget whenever it came up. If he relapsed again it would be like all this time together was for nothing. My eyes teared remembering that I almost lost him yesterday and he was right, he was the only man who ever loved me, I thought sadly. Was I really going to throw all this away?

He grabbed my waist pulling me towards his bulging pelvis and smothered his stinging booze ridden mouth over mine. I wanted to feel something so desperately, but it just couldn't compare to what I felt last night. How could the fates be so cruel? I wondered. He continued to shove his tongue down my mouth, but as hard as I tried, I couldn't feel it, subconsciously putting my hand against his chest firmly, and then I pulled my mouth away from his, wishing we could just go back to a week ago, before any of this every happened.

"Maybe you've wanted it rough all along, maybe I was being too gentle before."

He growled. His hand wrapped securely around my waist pulling me too him while his other hand reached under my skirt and yanked at my panties.

"Bill…"

I didn't like his hands down there, it gave me Déjà vu.

"Shhh!!!! I know you don't want to break up with me, I know you want to be a good little girl and take care of your grandmother, and now that you've gotten your little handyman fantasy out of your system you can rest easy that all is forgiven, but I have needs too…"

He unzipped his pants and his fingers plunged into my womanhood invasively, pulling my back to his bulging member. I closed my eyes tightly and thought about all that I had done. My betrayal, I had to be strong and take one for the team no matter how badly I wanted to pull away.

He rubbed me hard, hard enough that I felt pain, pinching squeezing rubbing faster. Everything became blurry as I remembered the childhood events that changed me forever. The flashbacks coming quicker now as my head spun dizzily.

He shoved me down over the arm of his couch and pushed up my skirt and I shook as his gaze fell down my heart stopped when I realized what he had found. The hickey.

"So you have been fucking him, I should have figured you were lying about that virgin shit too. You're a whore just like your brother…"

Bill hissed angrily. I felt the tears sting my eyes and I protested, afraid of what he was going to do…

"Bill, please, I can explain…"

Oh God, how could it have gone any worse? I wondered panicking.

"There's only one way to make you mine, and make sure he never touches you again."

He hissed in my ear and I recoiled from his lashing words. Suddenly all of those repressed memories from my childhood came rushing to the surface and I froze in terror wondering when things had gone from bad to worse. But I knew it was too late for talking.

"Please"

I whimpered once more weakly, but knew it was too late as he exposed himself to me, fully aroused, unprotected, and ready to take what he deemed his. He shoved me back in an attempt to pin me down.

"**_No_**_!"_

Was the last thing I said before the panties that had been ripped off my legs fell to the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: **Okay as promised, this chapter is totally 100% from Eric's POV. I just wanted to thank all of you again for the wonderful reviews and constructive feedback I got from the last chapter. I know not everyone was thrilled with the sharp left turn the story took, but I thought Id put in a little note that not everything is what it seems here. I still have a few cards up my sleeves, and besides the theme of coming into oneself as a person the secondary theme is, dont judge a book by its cover. ;) Anyway, hope you like this one. As you will see, E is more than happy to give his 200 cents. ;) Thanks for reading and enjoy! :D

_**Chapter 7-The Viking**_

I never thought I would be contributing to this little story. Don't get me wrong, I've wanted to add my 2 cents for awhile now and explain a thing or two about what I'm doing here and how I came to stay with Sookie and her grandmother, but now is not the time, Ill get to it later.

The truth is, the fact that I'm here, in place of Sookie, actually scares me a little, which is a hard thing to do since the things I have seen in my life should factor much higher on the terror scale compared to this. But nevertheless, I was worried for her.

You see I was there the night Bill came to the door. Trust me when I say I was gripping onto my chair arms with all the power I possessed in an attempt to stay seated and bite my tongue. The fact is I didn't particularly like Bill Compton, shocker right? It's not what you think though, it wasn't because he came in and pissed all over the nice day we were having, or made her smile fade the minute she saw him, or took her away and forced me to spend the rest of the evening alone, but it just so happened that I loathed his very existence. Id seen his type before. He came off all virtuous and pure and then he turned around revealed that he really was in fact a Dickwad, while accepting none of the blame. It was only a matter of time before she would find out that Dr. Jekyll was really in fact Mr. Hyde, a wolf in sheep's clothing.

On one hand, I didn't want to see Sookie get hurt, but on the other, it wasn't my place to object. I wasn't her boyfriend; we had no official attachments other than a couple amazing nights. Although unbeknownst to me until the moment she left, I realized I had felt a yearning deep inside for more. But the fact was, I was the other man. I wasn't hers and she wasn't mine.

I had known her for less than a week now and she probably wouldn't have listened to me even if I did protest, in fact if I objected it would have most likely made things worse. I wondered if there was a reason she could stand up to me so easily and not Mr. Compton, but then I realized she had found some strange little bond with him. Maybe because he was the boy next door and Sookie seemed to have a kinship with the people from this town, whether she wanted to believe it or not, maybe it was because he behaved like a southern gentleman when it mattered. I scoffed because that idea was so ludicrous. But despite my opinion young women seemed to swoon over his type, although I would never understand it. Despite the fact that Sookie told me he had his own internet business, the rest of his house, clothing, car, personality reminded me of something more fitting to another era, perhaps the dark ages? I just hoped she would have the courage to tell Bill what she told me. That she wasn't ready to get married, and ever to him. The Deutschbag needed to be put in his place once in his life.

I would be willing to wager he always got his way, and was used to it. Hence his controlling and possessive nature when we went to Merlottes a few nights ago. Which is why he was here putting on the pressure, when Sookie clearly told him she needed more time.

I clenched my teeth and bit down a low growl as she put on a fake smile and told us all she was going to join him for dinner and tried to get my mind off her. I was Eric Northman after all, I kept assuring myself. I could have any woman any place at any time, and I had.

But aside from my arrogance and experience with the females, there was something about Sookie that truly fascinated me and fanned the flames in my undying infatuation towards her. She was special, and not just special like different or noteworthy, she was really something to be admired and valued. A true rare and precious gem, although she didn't know it, which was the extraordinary part.

She was genuine and had no idea how beautiful she really was. It took me by surprise when I discovered that this stunning woman sitting at the bar all dressed up was the same woman who got down on her hands and knees and plunged her nails into the earth to get rid of a few weeds, or mowed the lawn in blistering heat, which I had always assumed was a man's job, or wash the laundry or read a good book on her front porch after she had finished a hard days work. It baffled me that she was perfectly at home in a place like this, completely ignorant to her natural gifts as she proceeded on with a life that was filled with honor, pride, hard work, and virtue. She was exquisite and mind numbingly complicated all at the same time. And unfortunately for me, I couldn't get her out of my head.

I must confess it took everything in my power to leave her room that night, you know which night I'm talking about of course, the night she fell over the edge in my arms. How could I forget her sweet and savory taste. Even now I could still remember the flavor of her nectar against my tongue.

Needless to say, I desperately wanted to stay there with her and hoped even for just a sliver of a chance that she might wake up and change her mind and let us unite the way we both fantasized about doing that first day we met.

But I knew she needed time, she needed space. She was young, and fairly inexperienced, and not like any other girl I had ever dated before. I had never met another 27 old ex virgin as beautiful, smart, witty, and lovely as her, but I certainly didn't want to ruin my chances if I had any. Dare I say I was actually starting to develop feelings for her, which surprised me given everything that had happened prior to my arrival in Bon Temps. Prior to my arrival, meeting someone like Sookie was the last thing on my mind.

When I saw her that day, standing on her front porch her arms crossed just so, waiting outside my new digs, I knew then that this was bigger than just some conquest. At this venture in my life I needed all of the cosmic help I could get and I took this fascinating familiar white dove standing there as a sign that I was where I was meant to be, it didn't hurt that her short shorts and tank top hugged every contour of her perfectly curved form as one lone drop of sweat fell deliciously down her neck into her ample bosom.

It took me almost all night to erase her from my mind, well if you count not being able to think about something for 60 seconds maximum. I stayed up and did some reading, and then I went downstairs to watch TV. I had some more of the strawberry ice cream, but it only reminded me more of her. Goddamit, life was unfair sometimes, I thought. I looked outside and noticed the sky was getting lighter and finally decided to turn in for the night, but my dreams were far from peaceful.

Which is why it saddens me to write that Sookie didn't come back home from Bills that night.

I couldn't help but wonder and worry that she had gone back to him out of obligation but you couldn't tell a person, least of all Sookie Stackhouse who she could or couldn't love no matter how toxic that person was for her.

When I saw her that next morning, I knew something was wrong. I tried to approach her and ask what happened, but Sookie just shrugged me off and replied torpidly…

"Just leave me alone, I want to be alone."

Her behavior had me worried, because her expression was hard as stone when she went back into the house and shut herself away in her room.

I figured Id give her an hour or two to collect herself but then I would go to her and find out what really happened. I wasn't stupid, nor had I ever seen Sookie in such a disentangled state before and it was clear something had happened.

I grew angry thinking about that ass hole Bill, wondering if he did or said something offensive to Sookie, and thought perhaps I needed to pay him a visit one of these days and give the southern gent a lesson in manners.

Still there wasn't much I could do at the moment. I wasn't used to having my hands tied or feeling helpless, but that was my current predicament. It was frustrating, aggravating, and exasperating as hell. So I did the only thing I could think of doing, I went back outside and took my fury out on the pile of wood I had began to chop earlier. It was another sweltering day, so I took my shirt off and made the most of the pick axe and the rest of the pre-measured two by fours, now obliterated down to a pile of scrap.

I didn't even know I was done until I reached behind me to grab another piece of wood and there wasn't anything to grab. Sighing to myself, I knew I was putting off the inevitable. So what did he do this time? Dump her? Give her an ultimatum? Maybe they had another fight? But if she was there all night it couldn't have been that bad. Maybe she broke up with him? I thought hopefully, realizing quickly that I was chasing a pipe dream. She wasn't going to leave him, if she was, she would have told him so last night.

The sooner I faced the fact that we had is what I've had with every other woman I've dated in the last 2 years, a mutual attraction and nothing more, the better off we would be. No more buying time, I told myself, wondering if being stuck with my thoughts was worse than confronting her, I realized it was time to check on Sookie.

So I ventured back inside, wiped the sweat off my brow, put a new shirt on, and then went upstairs in search of her.

I wasn't prepared to find the door locked when I got there, I knocked once, but she didn't answer.

"Sookie?" I called, rapping once more, my frustration still apparent.

"Sookie are you okay, please open the door!" I asked.

And then I heard something that sounded like glass crashing and a muffled cry come from far away. Not sobbing but it sounded like she was in pain. And I called her name again this time more urgently, the concern coming up to the surface…

"SOOKIE?"

But I was met with silence.

I grew worried and dare I even say terrified with each long second that followed trying the door handle once more. It wasn't budging.

I half considered kicking in the door or possibly loosening the hinges but that would take too long, then I remembered I saw her window partially open from outside, and I knew how I would get in.

5 minutes later I had scaled the siding of the house and taken a perch on the roof covering the porch as I popped the screen off, pushed the window up and climbed inside.

Sookie was not in her room and I instantly became more alarmed. I feared for her, finally bursting through her bathroom door I found her lying there crumpled in a heap on the cold tile floor. My eyes traveled from the broken mirror down to her shaking body and over to the large shard of mirror now embedded in her heavily bleeding wrist. My eyes widened when I saw the blood dripping from her arm and pooling on a spot next to her on the floor.

"Sookie what have you done?" I gasped.

Panic flew through me when I saw her lying there blood everywhere. I flashed back to another time and place and froze for a moment in terror. I didn't know what to think, maybe she was dead now? My body in shock, and then all of the sudden she began to move and moan in pain. It was enough to snap me back into action and I rushed to her side.

I carefully dislodged the piece of glass, which caused the blood to gush out faster as the piece of broken mirror clamored to the floor after falling out of my shaky hands. There was just so much, it was so eerily familiar I couldn't take it, having to repress my tears and the urge to go numb. But I had to hold myself together, for her.

"Sookie?" I whispered pressing my lips to her temple scared she had lost too much, and then I heard a another soft sob as her face moved against my chest weakly, clearly not making any effort assist my attempts.

"You have to let me carry you."

I had to get her to the hospital. I couldn't lose her, not like I lost everyone else; I wouldn't allow myself to think such horrible things.

I quickly found a towel from the bathroom and tied it tightly around her wrist, and I assured her…

"Stay with me Min Ӓlska!"

Her eyelashes fluttered open and closed and I quickly unlocked her door rushing through it I carried her downstairs, grabbed my car keys and sped to the hospital.

I was getting familiar with the hospital since I had already been here once this week, hoping I wouldn't have to see the place much more after this I ran Sookie into the emergency room and told them what had happened.

A grueling few hours later, after I had wracked my brain over what could have happened to make her do that, to make her attempt to take her life, which stirred up an avalanche of pain, her doctor found me in the waiting room an emotional wreck. She was a petite 4 feet 11inches tall and I must have looked like a giant standing next to her, but I had never been more afraid when I looked into her eyes. She introduced herself as Dr. Ludwig and then pulled me aside and she asked me sternly…

"Are you her boyfriend?"

I felt my breath shudder feeling uncertainty over the nature of her question, I wondered worriedly if she had lost too much blood, did she need a donor? What would I tell her grandmother what would I do without her? But the doctor was waiting for my reply and I looked into her hard eyes and I shook my head. No I wasn't her boyfriend, but I wanted to be.

"Did you engage in sexual intercourse with Miss. Stackhouse last night?" She asked me coolly. I shook my head again, not quite sure what she was getting at, my head was swimming, and then it hit me. I looked back at her in question and her dark glare gave me all the response I needed as the hard pits rained down inside my stomach.

"No." I whispered not sure if my reply was an answer to her earlier question or disbelief because I had already imagined in my head what she was going to tell me and I looked back at her horrified.

She closed her eyes and handed me a card…

"It looks like there is no long term damage down there, just some bruising on the outside, it might hurt for her to sit or ride a bike for a couple days. She's a little drugged up right now but she will be able to go home once we get her signed out. She had about 15 stitches put in her wrist and I prescribed her some painkillers with an antibiotic, she should be able to go off them in a few days. But I want her to seriously consider calling Detective Bellefleur when she's had some sleep to report this incident."

I tried to bite back my anguish, disbelief, and the simmering rage I was feeling for Bill Compton and simply nodded my head. My poor darling Sookie. So that's what this was about? She had attempted to take her life after that monster attacked her? This whole time I had been thinking about my loss, my grief, but what about Sookie?

"Ill see her next week to follow up on this." She concluded sharply, still cautionary of me, but I didn't care. I was too shaken up over this news, unable to meet her stare, my mind began to retreat inside itself in shock and dismay.

"Yes, thank you doctor." I answered my eyes fixed on some inanimate object on the lobby floor.

The doctor nodded curtly and then she was off. A few minutes later a nurse came by with Sookie's paperwork and I filled it out as best I could and then I was allowed in to see her.

Dr. Ludwig was right. She was pretty drugged up and I found myself feeling relieved for that at the moment because I didn't trust my emotional or physical reaction once I spoke to Sookie and heard the truth from her mouth.

I however knew the moment I saw her that I would take care of her first and foremost, and deal with Bill 'The Bastard' Compton later. His karma card was up and he had some vengeance coming. Of that much I knew.

My primary concern was Sookie and once I got her home I took her up to her bedroom and she eagerly fell fast asleep.

There wasn't much I could do at that point but clean up the mess she made in her bathroom and wait. I must have checked on her like 20 times, and the last time I peeked into her rooms her eyes opened groggily and met mine.

I crept in trying not to disturb her, not quite sure why I was trying to be quiet and asked her softly feeling the need to do something for her, anything…

"Can I get you something, some water perhaps? Are you hungry? I could make you some food?"

Her lips curved ever so faintly, and she blinked slowly tiredly shaking her head.

"You are still tired? (I assumed) I will let you go back to sleep."

She blinked again and replied her voice just barely above a whisper…

"Stay"

I met her gaze in confusion, but she simply moved her bandaged wrist up past her sheets so her other hand could lift them up, welcoming me inside her bed, and I momentarily wondered if she was lucid, but she simply asked…

"Tell me a story."

What other choice did I have? I could dance around the elephant in the room as long as I wanted and feel awkward over what transpired today, what I knew about her and Bill whether she wanted me to or not, and keep my emotional distance, but the truth was I needed her just as much as she needed me. I wanted to make sure she was comfortable, that she was feeling well and taken care of, but if my company was all she requested, I certainly couldn't refuse her. After pausing for a moment to make sure it is what she really wanted, realizing she was waiting for me, I moved the chair aside and kicked off my shoes. Sliding in beside her this time she moved to sit up and I could see she was attempting to make room.

"A story about what?" I asked gently after we had settled back in, finding a position that felt surprisingly comfortable and easy as her fragile body carefully folded into mine.

"About your life."

She closed her eyes and leaned her head against my chest. I felt her small body sink into mine molding into me like a plaster cast and I was in heaven. Not quite sure how I could think pleasurable thoughts at a time like this, but somehow she stirred something inside me.

"You're trying to trick me into telling you why I'm here aren't you?" I mused gently calling her out on her strategy to turn the spotlight on me, yet I couldn't say I blamed her. She put her bandaged hand over my chest and smiled in confirmation. I knew it, I thought, remarking…

"That's a low blow, even for you." I concluded and her smile grew cleverly. But there was no way I could deny her a thing in her current state, so I took a deep breath and began…

"Well, I wasn't always as deviously handsome and charming as I am now." She smiled again, I could feel her warm breath press against my chest through my shirt and that was all the encouragement I needed.

"Like I said, I moved here from Sweden to live with my uncle, when my mother lost her battle with Cancer. Well my uncle is actually my godfather; he was my mother's advisor and Professor of Early European History while she was a student at Oxford. So he wasn't a relative by blood.

You see my grandparents had died before I was born and I had no idea what happened to my father, because I was a love child and he had long gone before he even knew my mother was pregnant, so she asked her mentor, Professor Fintan Brigant to be my legal guardian should anything ever happen to her."

Sookie put her hand on mine and I pressed my cheek against the top of her forehead, so she could turn into me and fit her head into the crook of my neck in my desire to be close to her. Then I continued.

"So I spent my remaining years of high school in Shreveport. You see Fintan moved back here to return to his family homestead once retiring from Oxford.

After graduating, I attended college at Tulane. It was just coming out of a final exam which concluded my Junior year when I learned from the police department in Shreveport, that my uncle Fintan had been found wandering aimlessly through downtown Shreveport in nothing but his underwear, it seemed he had gone quite mad in my wake, and he was later diagnosed with Dementia. I spent the summer home with him but he seemed to be getting worse, until finally he could no longer take care of himself without full time care. I didn't have the skills or time to watch him around the clock. I had to work to support myself, so we used the rest of his money and the money my mother left me, to pay for his long-term care.

I had yet to finish my last year, and didn't have the finance to afford tuition, so I joined the Reserves. It was there while I was on tour in Iraq that I met my good friend Godric. We were inseparable, and when we got back, it was like getting a second chance at life. Fintan had the care he needed, I went back to school, but ended up changing my major from history to business, much to my uncles disappointment, and getting my Masters. Godric had just opened this new bar in Shreveport that was hitting it big and once I graduated he asked me to join him as his business partner. Things were good."

I looked down at Sookie and she blinked up at me, still silent out of respect, I could tell she wanted to know more, although I really didn't want to explain the next part, nor did I want to upset her. I paused for a long moment trying to find my words; to articulate how one could describe what happened to him without getting graphic...

"Only, unfortunately for Godric, the war changed him, in ways its hard to understand for anyone who hasn't done a tour." I swallowed and closed my eyes, feeling sorrow, flashing back to that day; I finally spat it out...

"He suffered from post traumatic stress syndrome. I eventually took over the bar while he took off some time for himself. We still kept in touch and met at least once a week for dinner, but I could tell he was getting worse. I asked him if he was getting help and he said he had been going to see a social worker, but he wasn't much help. I suggested he try a psychiatrist friend of mine from college and he had agreed. Only Godric never made it to see her.

The night before that appointment, he took his life instead, which is how I came to be here."

I looked down again and saw one long tear fall down her face, not wanting to make her sad. There was more, but I didn't want to bring that up now, she had seen so much turmoil today, and I tried to make light of it, although never in my wildest dreams would I have done it on any other occasion...

"So now you see why I didn't want to start off with that story when you first asked me why I was here, because telling it in any way shape or form is a definite buzz kill."

She creased her brows and looked up at me.

"I'm so sorry Eric."

I shook my head not wanting to worry her self or weep for me and I replied quietly...

"Life comes and goes, but we just have to make the most of it while we are here. It's too precious to take for granted."

I looked down at her, realizing what happened tonight hit close to home for me, very close. I wanted to tell her in my own way that I didn't want her to hurt herself any more. Attempted suicide, however poetic and tragic cause far more pain after it happens than it ever could before.

Sookie met my gaze sadly, and looked down at her bandaged hand coming up to brush my face and she confessed, to which I believe was an attempt to alleviate my fears...

"It was an accident, I didn't try to hurt myself on purpose, I smashed my hand against the mirror, it stung for a second and then there was blood everywhere, and I didn't mean to scare you, but I was just so mad."

I took a deep breath, daring to address that elephant in the room, wondering if I could ask her this question without breaking something, my voice shaking a little, I finally remarked quietly…

"Did he hurt you?"

The look on her face told me everything I needed to know. My jaw clenched and eyes closed for a moment in sad lament as I imagined the horrific experience this poor sweet lovely woman endured. It made me physically ill, to think of it.

"I took care of it."

Is all she said, but the pain behind her eyes spoke volumes. I put my arm around her wanting to protect her and make her feel safe now and I felt her wrap her arms around me. I knew then that, whether or not Sookie thought she handled the situation, I was going to amend it, so she would never have to worry about him again, I thought angrily. But I didn't want to press her, and as I said, I had my own reservations on the subject. She had been through so much already. Afraid if she told me exactly what she meant by taking care of it, that the mental image I had running in my mind of she and Bill was confirmed true, I would jump out of bed, find a shot gun and blow a hole through his head. I had done it before in Iraq, I could do it again. I knew she needed professional help to get through this--Professional help mentally, and professional help physically to take out the trash.

The room felt heavy, she had the weight of the world on her shoulders, and I could feel it. Needing to change the subject, I swallowed and finally replied trying to lighten the somber mood…

"Ill just have to keep you tied to me then, it seems like whenever you venture away, you get into trouble, now why is that?"

She smiled at me, clearly relieved with my change of topic. I smiled and leaned in to kiss the side of her cheek just wanting her to concentrate on healing now and nothing else but she turned and my lips brushed her mouth gently, like a featherlike kiss. I felt something I had never felt before; I felt an emotional connection to her as well as a physical. It was a mixture of the passion, and yearning, but also something more, something indefinitely more meaningful. Don't get me wrong, the other kisses were great, but this one spoke to my heart.

I could see why Sookie didn't want to kiss me on the mouth a third time, because three times was definitely the charm. If I could have kissed her this way forever, I would have died a happy man. It was soft and tender at first, my mouth delicately dancing over hers, and she kissed me back with the same delicate nature. My whole body buzzed loving the feeling of her lips on mine. I closed my eyes and tasted her as if I was only just now discovering her mouth and her soft lips brushed against mine enveloping me in the sweetest kiss I had ever experienced. We took it slow, very slow as I carefully explored her taste inch by inch and I found myself pulling her body into mine.

_Oh god she felt good_, I thought feeling her weight press over me slowly sinking into my body. I felt guilty in that moment because she was starting to turn me on.

I dared to dip my tongue in-between her lips her tongue brushing against mine as I tasted her and dipped inside further. She tasted just as I remembered, just like heaven. I placed my hand against her temple for better access when I felt the condensation beading over her forehead.

Suddenly I pulled away puzzled as to why she was sweating, it wasn't that hot in here, in fact the window was open and I could feel a definite cool breeze. I put my hand across my forehead once more and pulled it back as if I had been stung.

"You're burning up."

She looked back at me lucidly, her tired eyes smiling and she replied…

"No I'm not, I'm freezing, come closer and warm me up."

She wrapped her hands around my sides but I could tell something was wrong. No nothing more could go wrong, I wouldn't let it.

She kissed me again, but I couldn't live with myself if something bad happened, and I pulled away proclaiming.

"Sookie I'm going to call your doctor."

She began to shiver, and I panicked slipping out of the bed I assured her…

"Ill be right back, I promise."

Her eyes were sad and disappointed but I could also tell that she was tired because she hadn't put up a fight. I felt even guiltier now for getting turned on, but I had no time for guilt.

"I promise." I assured her one more time, but I think it was more for me. Then I went downstairs found my cell phone and called the hospital.

Much to my disappointment, her doctor wasn't there, nor was any other doctor. Yes I know, what the fuck was wrong with these people? Small town or not, they had a hospital and there were no doctors on duty???

So I told the nurse what had happened. She remembered Sookie from earlier today and told me to take her temperature after I tore the house apart looking for a thermometer while she waited on my insistent request. Sookie was at 100 degrees and the nurse informed me that I needed to keep her warm if she was cold, supply plenty of fluids, apply a damp cloth to her forehead and massage her, in order to alleviate, relax, and break the fever.

I shouted at her and swore in Swedish when she gave me these preposterous instructions, proclaiming that I was bringing Sookie in this second, but the nurse informed me that bringing her in while she was having a fever wouldn't help Sookie in the slightest. So I neglected to thank her and hung up the phone angrily.

I dampened a cloth and found an extra blanket for her bringing it all back upstairs with a glass of water and Sookies prescription and I helped her take 2 more antibiotic pills. She was starting to doze off now, still shaking, I got back in bed with her and placed the wet warm cloth against her forehead, and began to lightly massage her shoulders from behind. She smiled in relief and she leaned back against me still trembling, but I could tell the remedies were helping because her body eventually stopped shivering. When she felt heavy in my arms, I adjusted myself so I was laying along side her holding her in my arms, and she asked me quietly before drifting off…

"Stay here forever?"

I lay there with her for a long while, so long I lost track of time contemplating those words and what they meant, whether or not she really meant them. I just watched her sleep, until; I realized that I desperately wanted to stay. I continued to watch her, noting the steady rise and fall of her chest and the slight gape in her mouth as she slept peacefully. I put my hand up to her forehead, found that the burning hot was gone to my great relief, and I whispered in her ear…

"As long as you wish."

I relaxed next to her on the bed, my arms secured firmly around her and I realized in that moment how much this place really felt like a home. It had been so long since I had a real one I had almost forgot what it felt like to fit in. I wanted to find a place to belong so badly, and most of all, I wanted to make sure Sookie was going to be okay.

Before closing my eyes, I thought again about calling the hospital, but I had the feeling I would be wasting my time. There was one person however; I did need to talk to. I wasn't going to screw this up again.

So I reached over to grab my phone on the nightstand and made the call.


	8. Chapter 8

**AN**: Ah Im falling behind, lol. I had been able to keep a few chapters ahead when I started, now I only have one, after this. There needs to be more time in the day. Anyway, I just thought Id put a little note that the updates may be a bit slower now, I need to catch up because I want to keep stuff straight in my head as far as timeline and maintain consistency in the emotional tone. Hehe. Anyway, thanks for your patience. Hope you like this chapter. We have a little cameo from one of my favorite characters. :D Enjoy! xoxo

**_Chapter 8-Mercury Rising_**

I could smell lilacs and fresh air and hear the song of the sparrows singing in the distance. Taking in a deep breath I roused to a tapping sound. I smiled because the last fragments of my memory recalled that spring meadow and I licked my lips. Yes the moss under me had been crushed and there was a soft babbling brook near bye to muffle our cries of pleasure. But where was that tapping coming from? I reached over to feel the spot of grass Eric had just occupied mere moments before realizing it had gone cold, now replaced by my bed and I wondered where he went. I realized my eyes were still closed and opened them.

I was blinded by the brightness at first, disoriented for a moment, I tried to get my bearings and then as my gaze came into focus I found another pair of intense blue eyes staring right back at me. Yes I was in the safety of my bedroom I realized, but that didn't explain why there was a strange woman I had never met sitting on the chair across from my bed her gaze fixed intently to mine. I jerked my head back, feeling cautious, on guard, and then she spoke…

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty, I was wondering if you would ever wake up!"

I met her gaze in confusion wondering who this woman was and I propped myself up on my elbows and realized where the tapping was coming from. She had a laptop in her lap and had just typed something quick before folding it up and setting the computer aside. I pushed myself up and asked her defensively, not liking that a strange woman was sitting in my own bedroom watching me sleep…

"Who are you?"

But she just smiled smugly and shook her head as if in belligerent disbelief…

"I see he didn't tell you I was coming, figures…"

Who didn't tell me? Eric? I wondered but she was already leaning in to fluff my pillow and she replied putting her hand out to greet me…

"I'm Pamela Ravenscroft, you can call me Pam for short, I'm a friend of Eric's."

I looked back at her still confused, but then as she stood and offered her hand to shake mine, I took in her entire form, tall, blonde, big boobs, amazing lips, intense eyes, long legs, drop dead gorgeous, I quickly realized why she was familiar to me. Jason!

_It was her, it was his girlfriend! _

I wondered why she was here and not Eric, feeling like pond scum at the moment, I reluctantly took her hand, because I had manners but every fiber of my being was yelling at me not to.

"You're his girlfriend right?" I asked hesitantly not sure if I wanted to hear her reply.

She raised a brow in intrigue and explained…

"Ex girlfriend actually."

Yeah right, just give them 24 hours, with a super model like her walking around there was no way he was ever coming back to me. Laying my head back down on the pillow as if in defeat, I creased my brows and she asked me…

"So he has told you about me?"

I looked back at her, feeling like I had just gotten smashed between a freight train and a concrete wall. I was in no mood to talk about their couple status or how Eric felt about her or she him, and I shook my head putting my bandaged hand over my forehead.

"No, my brother saw you here earlier."

Pam smiled smugly and she laughed lightly…

"Oh right, him."

My eyes darted to hers and there was a twinkle behind them, much like Eric's twinkle and I suddenly understood the attraction. And realized they were far from over. If he called his girlfriend here to look after me, they were most certainly not over.

Pam seemingly oblivious to my misery explained, glancing over at my wrist quickly and then back at me with dare I say a look of concern…

"Well Eric had to run and get some groceries and he went to the drug store to get a new prescription for you, he called the Doctor this morning and demanded that she give you a stronger antibiotic since you had a fever last night, which means your immune system was fighting off an infection."

I nodded my head wondering why she was telling me this, really wanting her to leave at the moment and I pulled up my sheets and swung my legs over my bed and proclaimed dizzily…

"That's nice, I think Ill take a bath now, so thanks for stopping by."

Trying to be polite in the way we southern girls had been trained but making the message clear that I didn't need to be babysat I motioned to move past her. Only she stood up with me and proclaimed with a smile standing between me and my bathroom…

"Oh good, I can help you, Eric gave me strict orders not to leave your side."

I sighed and rolled my eyes, finally the bitch coming out, I was so not happy with Eric right now, or his high handedness, and I asked her sharply…

"Did he? Well I can assure you I'm perfectly fine with taking care of myself, I'm not 5 so you can run along and go meet him or do whatever you were intending to do when you came!"

She smirked and replied smugly…

"I'm beginning to see what all the fuss was about, you are a little pistol aren't you?"

I looked back at her in challenge wondering if this woman was for real. What more did she want from me? I wondered if Pam got kicks from rubbing her relationship with Eric in other girls faces and then she replied to my shock and dismay…

"Actually, I thought while he was gone we could take some advantage of a little girl time, and talk about what happened to you."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was she kidding? But one look at her face and I could tell that she was quite serious. I couldn't believe Eric told her! Obviously last night meant nothing to him, what little I could remember of it. My jaw fell slack, and I grew angry, my blood suddenly boiling, I grabbed a pair of clean pants, a tank my bra and underwear and spat back before marching into my bathroom…

"Don't waste your time, I have no interest in discussing what happened to me with anyone right now, let alone a complete STRANGER!"

And then I promptly slammed the bathroom door behind me locking it.

I would never admit it, but I still did feel a little sore. Thankfully the pain killers took care of that problem once they kicked in. But I soon realized, eventually I had to come out. After spending 30 minutes in the bathtub allowing my skin to prune up nicely, there wasn't much else to do. Luckily the bandage on my wrist was water tight, although that may have been tested due to the long time I was in the water. When I got out I saw one loose end and grabbed some tape to patch it up. I got dressed and waited silently for a moment to determine whether or not the so called Ex was still out there. I digressed that she had gone, and took the risk of opening the bathroom door. To my immense relief there was no Pam to be found. But one look out my window and I saw the silver Ferrari and knew she had to still be here.

"Damn him!"

I spat thinking I was going to kill Eric for this. Okay yes I was partially to blame for this little problem because I was a participating member in his little midnight snack the other night, but HE DIDN'T HAVE TO TELL HER ABOUT MY LIFE. That was nobody's business but my own! I told him about my accident in confidence Goddamit!!!

It made my blood boil and the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to slug Eric. Like I had slugged Bill.

I sighed, took a deep breath and then ventured downstairs bravely.

Heidi Klum was seated in the kitchen, she had made herself at home with coffee and some toast and jam, and I sneered. Suddenly understanding what that jealousy thing was about that Bill went through when he found out I was with Eric. She should not be here. Not in my house, eating my food, acting like she owned the damn place!

"Good morning!" She replied with a chipper smile when she spotted me rounding the corner. But I was in no mood for politeness and I replied coolly…

"Morning." My southern accent strong and sharp. It was always enunciated when I was angry. I turned around to pour myself a cup hoping that the coffee might make her disappear and that's when I saw her get up and approach me from behind.

"You can GO now!" I finally spat back, turning to face her but to my embarrassment, instead of waiting behind me to refill her mug, she had gone to wash it out in the sink. But I still meant it, and my nostrils flared as I watched her as she placed her hand gently on the counter and turned to face me.

"Sookie, I think we got off on the wrong foot, I'm sorry to have startled you, I assure you I mean you no harm I'm only here as a favor to Eric, you see I'm a Psychiatrist."

Okay that did it! Eric was officially on my shit list. I told him about my wrist in confidence, Christ, what a boneheaded prick!

"I think you have worn out your welcome sweetie, so why don't you skedaddle, for real!" I glared at her and she creased her brow still not backing down she approached me cautiously, and dared to put a hand on my shoulder…

"Sookie, I know you and I don't know each other very well, and we only just met, but in situations like this, it's good to talk to someone."

I shook my head and spat back…

"I already told him it was an accident! But the ass hole obviously didn't choose to believe me! If you think I'm going to sit here like some guinea pig and tell you about my feelings or whatever, you are sorely mistaken!"

She closed her eyes and sighed, and then looked back at me with a deep sympathy, concluding with a voice of complete seriousness…

"You think rape is an accident?"

My eyes opened wider in outrage, when she flashed the 'Rape' word at me. And then it all suddenly made sense. That's what this was all about! He thought Bill raped me! I suddenly felt sick again, getting fed up with all the assumptions flying around and Pam pried gently…

"Sookie, tell me what you are thinking right now, what are you feeling?"

I paused for a moment in reflection and then finally I snapped, shrugging her hand off my arm as if I had been stung, I looked at her directly in the eye and replied confronting her once and for all…

"I think I'm going to get the hell out of here! Go ask your boyfriend how I'm feeling, he seems to know more about me than even I can recall!!!"

And with no hesitation, I set down my mug, grabbed my car keys which were lying on the table in the hallway and made a beeline for the front door. I flew out the screen door barely having a chance to slam it properly from behind and then I turned around nearly crashing into Bill as he was coming up the stairs.

"Sookie, he gasped!"

_Oh good lord, someone up there must really hate me!_ I thought, in no mood to deal with him right now, not what after happened last night. Stumbling a little in an attempt to find my balance and stand my ground I sized him up and down. I was happy to see he got as much out of the other night as I did. His eye now black and blue and his lip split, and his arm held in a tourniquet.

And then I saw the bouquet of roses in his other hand. Needless to say, it didn't take a rocket scientist to put two and two together.

He was here to apologize.

"Go home Bill! You said all you needed to say the other night!" He shook his head his eyes earnest and he looked haunted.

"Sookie please! You have to know, I went to the doctor to get my arm wrapped."

I rolled my eyes having no tolerance for his bull crap. But he continued despite my obvious disinterest…

"He found Exstasy in my blood stream Sookie, I never took that willingly, I swear to you on Sarah's life, someone must have slipped it into my drink at Merlottes before I went to pick you up! I want you to know I never NEVER would have hurt you and Its driving me insane to think I might have hurt you, all I can remember is kissing you and then I woke up to find myself in this miserable state with your ripped panties on my floor. (He looked back at me horrified) Please, I know it sounds ridiculous but you have to believe me, I cant bare to think of what I might have done!"

I looked down at the flowers in his hands and he plead with me…

"Sookie, I love you, I still want to marry you, but I understand, I understand if you never want to see me again, but I wanted you to know the truth…I'm a good man, I would never do that to you baby! Please…"

He begged again and for some reason I felt my heart warming to those puppy dog eyes, it all made sense now, I met his stare for a moment in pause wanting in that moment to desperately get past it, go back to normal, and open up my heart again, but my stubbornness wouldn't let me. And I declared…

"That's nice to know, thanks for stopping by Bill, but I think it would be best if you left."

My cold stare gave him all the answer he needed, and I swore I thought I saw a tear form at the edge of his eye.

I heard the door open from behind me and I winced in no mood to deal with the she-devil again.

"Sookie are you alright? Do you need me to shove my heel up this mans ass for you?" I heard Pam reply giving Bill an appraising look as she stepped out of the screen door in her pumps, tweed skirt, and pink satin blouse, looking quite dangerous, and she replied casting me a glance of approval paired with a smug grin…

"Nice work, by the way." Referring to Bill's sorry state at the moment.

I darted my head back and looked at her in my defenses instinctively rising, but she was clearly out here to support me. Although I didn't know her and she was Eric's ex, so by law I was ordered to hate her I couldn't help but appreciate the offer. But I could take care of Bill, and replied turning back around to face Bill…

"No Pam, I'm fine, I can handle this MYSELF!" I sent Bill a warning look, wanting him to take the hint that he was not welcome here. I could take care of myself. That much I was sure of after the other night.

Then to make matters worse, I saw the infamous Little Red Riding hood pull up in the driveway behind him, yet Bill hadn't noticed. He was to hell bent on begging, and he continued to plea, putting one foot on the step above him in an attempt to reach my level, but it was clear he wasn't going to get any farther…

"I know you need time now and Ill give you all the time you need, if it takes you 20 years, Ill wait, I cant bear to lose you Sookie, not like I lost Sarah, if you knew how tormented I am over this."

"You're tormented? I think I can show you tormented you pathetic excuse for a human being!" Pam growled. I flashed her a glare, having just enough of her input.

And then I saw Eric approach from behind the look on his face lethal.

"Hello Bill." His deep baritone voice echoed from behind, as if Zeus himself had spoken and Bill turned around to look at him. His back was turned to me so I could no longer see his eyes, but I think for a moment Bills hand actually began to shake, then he clenched his fist and challenged him…

"I'm trying to have a PRIVATE conversation here, would you and your friend here PLEASE LEAVE us alone for a minute?"

I actually thought I saw Eric smile. He nodded his head politely and replied…

"Of course, how rude of me."

I looked back at him baffled because he was acting strangely himself but he wouldn't look at me which made me even more upset and as Bill began to turn back around to face me, it took a split second for Eric to react, and then I shrieked as the unmistakable sound of fist smashing bone rung through our ears.

Bill along with his flowers flew through the air and landed on the dirt below the porch stairs. Blood was pouring out of his nose and Bill was shaking and he spat back angrily…

"You Ass Hole!" Bill growled holding his bloody nose, but Eric simply went over to Bill elbowed his jaw in causing blood to also ooze out of his mouth and then he pulled Bill up by his collar and threatened him menacingly…

"I hardly think you are in a position to judge who is an asshole and who isn't! Perhaps you need to come with me and I can show you a real lesson in manners. Hmmm?"

He sneered, and although I was sure Bill had a few years on Eric, I had never seen Eric look more lethal and it frightened me and then he concluded…

"Despite wherever your backyard happens to be, you wont touch her again!"

He elbowed Bill again, this time nearly knocking him out, blood spurting out, and I put my hand up to my mouth in horror.

"When I'm done with you, Rape may be a word you will never be able to utter again, let alone perform!"

There was that word again. That horrible ghastly word that lit me up like a firecracker, and finally I was done being silent. I felt a rage rise up inside me and take hold of the situation…

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" I barked, but Eric simply stood up straighter.

"What am I doing?" He asked me blatantly confused and that's when I lost it…

"YOU MAKE FALSE ACCUSATIONS AND THINK YOU CAN INVITE YOUR GIRLFRIEND HERE TO CLEAN UP YOUR MESS FOR YOU? YOU CANT EVEN DEAL WITH ME ON YOUR OWN? WELL I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU MISTER, IM NOT SOME 5-YEAR-OLD CHILD THAT NEEDS HER HAND HELD TO CROSS THE STREET, IM FULLY CAPABLE OF HANDLING MY OWN PROBLEMS WITHOUT YOUR HELP! I LIVED JUST FINE HERE FOR 27 YEARS WITHOUT YOU, I THINK I CAN HANDLE ANOTHER 27 YEARS YOU BIG BULLY!"

His gaze darted to Pam's in question but I wasn't finished, taking a step down the stairs, around Bills body I cut back noting he had set down a bag of groceries about 5 feet away, …

"GO CHOKE ON YOUR (I was at a loss for what to say and then finally blurted out) BAG…YOU HIGH HANDED POMPOUS BASTARD!"

I looked from Pam to Eric to Bill, all three of them silent after my display and I reveled in it. And then Eric dared to speak.

"Sookie, after what he did to you, you're just going to let him walk? You're not even going to report him?"

I glared at Eric daring him to challenge me and I replied…

"I said I took care of him and I did, the cops aren't going to help the situation, he said he was sorry and I believe him, and the rest is NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!" I growled and he just stared at me angrily with brows creased.

"Sookie he Raped you!"

And then something inside me took over and I had no more control over my actions wanting him to know I wanted to be taken seriously, I rushed back over to him my hand flying as I slapped him hard across the face, and I shouted…

"GET BENT!"

And just like that I stomped off, car keys in hand, thank God I had thought to grab them earlier, and I jumped in my car and sped away.

I was so mad at Eric I wanted to break something. Just cause my Gran was here didn't mean he could walk all over me. And the ridiculous assumptions he made about Bill pissed me off too. It wasn't rape, if he had bothered to even ask me he would know, I slugged Bill hard in the face and then used my body to twist out from under him and snap his arm. I couldn't believe it. With Pam here and his accusations, I couldn't help but think he thought I was some poor helpless suicidal rape victim! Nothing made my blood boil more to be thought of so despicably, and from Eric of all people. I couldn't shake my head enough to acknowledge how wrong he was. Bill may have been rough, but it surely wasn't rape.

My dizzy feeling came back and I had to pull over. Oh who the hell was I kidding?

At the time all I could think of was how screwed up I was. No man would ever touch me now. What a mess I had made of things. I half considered going back to Bill and asking him if he would be willing to work things out. At least I would be holding the cards. At least I could get some respect, which was more than I could say for Eric.

A car passed me on the road and it blurred by. I instantly sat up straighter wanting to snap out of my pity party. There was no use crying over spilled milk, I thought, trying to pull myself together. But as I got my vision back I realized the car was backing up, and then I noticed it was silver, recognizing it as the Ferrari that was sitting in my driveway earlier I sighed and quickly made sure my face looked okay in the mirror. Smudged and my eyes were puffy and nose red, but otherwise I looked okay.

Since it was already 80 degrees and it wasn't even 10am yet, I had my window down. She pulled her car up along side me and her electric window on the passenger side came down. I looked back at Pam with brows creased angrily, with no desire to talk to her or anyone right now, nothing had changed since I woke up, but she simply replied…

"Get In!"

"Excuse me?" I looked back at her outraged as if she was growing horns out of her head she reached over to her passenger door and opened it repeating herself sternly…

"Get In!!"

I had a feeling she wouldn't leave me alone if I refused, so I finally sighed, turned off my car and took her offer.

Normally I would have had second thoughts about leaving my car parked here, but I knew this road probably had about one or two cars on it a day, one being mine, so I felt confident it would most likely be okay.

"What do you want?" I barked stubbornly folding my arms once inside. And Pam finally replied…

"First I want to apologize."

I scoffed and replied…

"Oh that's rich, so did your boyfriend put you up to this?"

Pam was silent for a long time, which actually made me uncomfortable, but I figured it was one of her shrink tricks, and then she replied while keeping her eyes on the road…

"Sookie, there's something you need to know about Eric."

"Yes, he already told me about his friend, see the difference between the two of us is I told him what happened to my wrist in confidence, I told him that I took care of Bill too, I never mentioned the rape word, but he twisted my tale around and broadcast it like it was a segment on the evening news, where as I chose to keep his admission in confidence."

"Are you going to let me talk or are you going to argue every syllable that comes out of my mouth?" Pam asked with a hint of sarcasm.

I looked back at her keeping quiet for a moment, she took it as a sign that she had the floor and continued…

"First of all, he is NOT my boyfriend, we haven't been together for 2 years now, I attended Tulane at the same time as he did, and we had a common friend-Godric."

I tried not to show my emotion, although Eric's admission about his friend still shook me and made me feel sadness for his loss.

"Secondly, Eric really cares about you Sookie, in fact I've never seen him this worked up about a girl, even when we were going out it wasn't even close to what you have. He even wanted to go after you now but I told him you needed your space."

I looked at her wondering if she was just pulling my leg or telling the truth, but thankful that she told Eric to back off at least. And Pam continued…

"Thirdly, as I said I'm sorry for throwing myself and my job at you earlier…I can see now how I must have come off, and I didn't want you to feel cornered. You see I am pretty good at reading people, and I can tell your not a person who is eager to share her feelings or even address them, you take care of others before yourself, and I thought the only way I might even have a chance of helping you was by giving you a little push…You have what I like to call a vault persona…And are one of the most difficult types to crack."

I looked at her uncomfortable with the shrink talk, not sure of what to think any more because she was confusing me, and she replied…

"You should take that as a compliment Sookie."

I flinched not wanting to take anything from her, and she finally concluded…

"Finally, I'm not going to pull any of my shrink psycho babble bull shit on you. If and when you are ready, I want you to know I'm here for you. (She handed me her card) If and when that day comes, you don't feel comfortable talking to me, this is my associate, who is also a highly esteemed therapist and has been doing this much longer than I have, in fact he was my mentor."

I took the cards reluctantly and Pam added…

"I don't know what happened although I would love to hear what took place in your words, but the Doctors report says there is evidence of sexual assault, bruising. Whatever or whoever you think you are protecting Sookie, it's wrong, and no woman should have to take this lying down or deal with it alone. Eric cares about you, and I care about you. We both just want what is best for you, even if that means our silence."

I took what she said to heart and nodded my head. There was another long moment of silence and finally Pam concluded…

"Now that that's out of the way, how about we start over again and go shopping?"

Okay now I thought I had heard it all and I looked back at her strangely wondering again who this chick really was, or if she still had some trick up her sleeves but she was quite serious.

Finally after a few long moments of heavy thinking on my part wondering what the hell I was doing, I figured I could use some new sundresses, and reluctantly agreed…

"Okay, but I need to stop by work after noon."

"You aren't actually considering work today are you?" She asked me objecting already, but I shook my head. I had read the Doctors note; I was to take it easy for the next few days…

"No but I need to talk to my boss about the schedule."

"Good, then after you've told him your taking the rest of the week off, you are going to let me treat you to lunch."

I looked back at her in question, but she just cast me a stern glance. I had a feeling she was a lot like Gran. Once she had made up her mind there was no arguing with her. I finally sighed, and sat back trying to enjoy myself, as much as I could on a day like this.

Pam knew just the place to go to make me forget about everything. I not only got a new sun dress, but she was able to find these cute shoes to go with it, along with a pretty red dress, one for me and a black one for herself. I argued that I couldn't afford to pay the price, but Pam insisted she knew the manager. And it seemed like she did. Although part of me suspected that she just said that so she could pay.

I wasn't going to let it ruin my morning though and as promised she treated me to lunch at Merlottes. I sat down in a booth across from Pam after speaking with Sam about my schedule thinking I could go for one of Laffey's famous barbecue grilled chicken sandwiches, with bacon, cheese, tomato, lettuce, and a big huge pickle drowned under a puddle of his secret sauce, yes that was just the distraction I needed.

As promised Laffey's chicken barbecue was finger licking awesome, we split a half order of French fries and onion rings while Pam enjoyed her grilled catfish. And then we got to the girl talk part…

"So have you and Eric…you know?" She asked me cheekily and I nearly spit out my sweet tea.

"Excuse me?" I asked her mortified and Pam replied smartly…

"Oh come on, I see the way he looks at you, don't tell me you haven't rolled around in the hay yet?"

I paused for a moment thinking of that night but quickly shook my head in denial.

"No sorry to say we have not."

But Pam's smirk crept slowly across her face and she replied clearly not buying it…

"Right."

"No really, I think I want to try being single for awhile." I assured her and she arched a perfectly shaped brow in my direction.

I took another sip of my tea to get my mind off it and then Pam answered…

"Well I can tell you from experience, when it does happen you wont soon forget it."

That time it went down the wrong tube and I started to cough. I looked up all of the sudden noticing that people were staring at us. Yes Pam was a looker that was a given, but I felt they were gazing at me more than her. My boss Sam Merlotte kept glancing up from the bar to steel a peek every 10 seconds too, and then I saw Arlene whispering to Dawn 2 seconds later Dawn glanced back at me. It didn't really hit me until I saw Hoyt look back at me too. Hoyt the sweetest most polite boy anyone would ever meet was staring? Which meant only one thing when you lived in a small town.

They knew, they all knew.


	9. Chapter 9

**AN**: Woo, just under the deadline, hehe. I wanted to have this done before LOST, woot, Go Sawyer! Sorry, had to get that out of my system. ;) Okay, now back to the story. Hehe, Im kins of nervous about this chapter, but I usually go with my gut, and this chapter came from my gut. So I hope you like. Thanks again to everyone who takes the time to review and read this crazy little story. Id love to know what you think if you get the chance. Thanks again! xoxo **Runs away and hides!**

_**Chapter 9-When Life Gives you Lemons, Find Someone Who's Life Gave Them Tequila And Have A Party**_

As promised, I didn't start a shift till Saturday when I knew Sam could really use my help. I must admit though, I was hit with some pretty heavy cabin fever by the time that day rolled around. I can't tell you how much Eric had been driving me crazy. If I wasn't so mad at him I could have empathized with his pathetic attempts to console me, because it was blatantly obvious he had no idea what he was doing. One minute treating me with the kid gloves, then the next he was joking about the weather or asking me if he should call Pam, which only pissed me off more. To say it was awkward was putting it mildly.

Then Friday afternoon, I found myself trapped in the woodshed with him, after I had gone to put away my spade and garden gloves after weeding out the back garden. Eric was apparently digging through some of the tools when I ran into him.

I remember that day well because to both my relief and horror, Jason came by looking for me, disrupting our terrible discomfort. Apparently he had just heard about the entire debacle from one of his buddies, although who knows which version he had heard, because he seemed to think Eric was the one who attacked me and then he threatened to take Eric out, which was rather comical in its own right because Eric had a good 5 inches on my brother. But all I could think was, great now they thought I was living with a rapist too? Life couldn't get any better could it? As if things could be worse. Of course, Jason opened up a whole new can of worms, which motivated Eric to defend him self and fill Jason in on the whole sordid story.

I assure you, by that point I had had enough.

I wasn't going to take their bull shit anymore and stormed out of the shed. Let them have each other!

So that was Friday night. Saturday morning I avoided Eric like the plague and it had been that way ever since.

Shaking my head I wondered what was it about men? They were worse than women sometimes! I had never been this vocal about feelings in my life. What made either Eric or Bill think I was going to start now?

I didn't know what was worse; trying to put on a smile when I was well aware almost everyone knew what happened or the thought of going home to deal with Eric again. I knew I had to find a way to stop this, but frankly right now I just didn't give a crap. Whatever was bugging Eric and everyone else was their problem, not mine and I didn't think it was up to me to confront him either. I just wanted my life to go back to the way it was.

I grabbed my purse and took out my car keys walking into the parking lot; I was about 20 paces in when all the sudden out of nowhere someone darted out in front of me from behind one of the cars. I nearly had a heart attack, shrieking I raised my purse to slug my attacker, and then the recognition set in.

It was Bill, and he was wearing a hooded sweatshirt. He looked like a mugger, but his arm still pinned in that sling was a dead give away…

"Bill what are you doing here? You scared me half to death!" I exclaimed and he shook his head putting his hand out in a gesture to silence me and I replied sharply in no mood to play his games…

"If you don't tell me why you're here in 5 seconds, I'm going to yell for Sam."

"Sookie, please don't, I have to speak with you." He insisted urgently, and I replied…

"Well it looks like your tongue is working just fine, so speak!"

He put his hand on my shoulders and pulled me to the side of my car. I automatically stiffened and he let go instinctively.

He looked around as if he was being watched, and he confessed…

"Your handyman has threatened me."

I looked at him for a moment with brows creased wondering if he was still taking that Exstasy stuff, but he looked more sober than before.

"Eric?" I asked confused and Bill nodded his head and he explained…

"I have reason to believe he is involved in some kind of organized crime because he says he has connections, he threatened to break me by pulling me apart limb from limb."

I looked back at him strangely not sure if I could even buy that story. Yes Eric was army and he could be tough when he wanted to, but he wasn't capable of that kind of cruelty and I shook my head, not really wanting to get into it because it was most likely Eric trying to get a rise out of him and I assured him…

"Bill I'm sure he was just trying to scare you."

"Sookie will you listen to me!" He proclaimed putting his hands back on my shoulders a little more firmly this time and I shrugged him off abruptly feeling as if I had been stung.

"First of all don't touch me!" I ordered.

"Secondly, I am listening Bill, and I know you're a big boy, I think you can handle him yourself."

"Its not me I'm worried about." He hissed and met my gaze with turbulent eyes. I wondered again if he was drunk but he spoke before I had a chance to smell his breath…

"You need to stay with one of your friends, Tara, or your brother, Sookie I don't feel right about this guy, I've had a bad feeling ever since he came into town."

I sighed thinking even for Bill that was a weak attempt and he offered…

"Id insist you stay at my place if I knew you'd agree to come, but I know you wont."

"You're right." I agreed promptly, seeing where this was going before he even said it.

"Thanks for your concern Bill, but I'm sure I can handle myself." I assured him and began to unlock my car door. I was just about to turn away from him pulling open my door handle when he blurted out…

"I miss us." He confessed and I glanced back at his angst-ridden face feeling the emotions stir in me…

"I miss us so much Sookie…" His eyes plead with mine and I felt the sad and melancholy pull wash over me. I had yet to mourn our breakup. I knew it was coming; I just didn't have time to deal with more bull crap right now.

"No matter what happens, I meant what I said, Ill be here for you no matter what, when you need me, if your brother gets another DUI, or your grandmother takes a bad fall on the back steps…I will be there again."

I looked back at him knowing he meant it and nodded my head. I was grateful for his support when those things had happened, despite what had become of our relationship, it wasn't all bad.

"Good night Bill."

I finally proclaimed unlocking my door and getting inside. He gave me a sad look as I did him and then he backed away. Id be lying if I said watching him and knowing what had become of us, of him didn't hurt. Despite my last encounter and what he did to me, I still loved him. You couldn't erase love as easily as you could words.

But, his problems were now his own; I wasn't going to worry about anyone but myself any more.

* * *

The next morning, I was surprised to find a dozen roses waiting for me at my front door. The deliveryman had me sign for them and I brought them in the kitchen to read the card.

Taking the little paper out of the envelope, I read the note…

"_My Dearest Sookie, Red is for love, but these roses are yellow, for friendship. I want you to remember what I said last night. I'm here for you forever, if anything ever happens, I'm just a phone call away. Love always, Bill"_

I didn't know if it was right for me to accept the flowers under the circumstances, but I wasn't one to let such a beautiful thing to go to waste, so I got out a vase and put them in some water.

Of course the next day, he sent another dozen roses, this time they were white. He left a note explaining that white represented purity and how it meant so much to him that I chose him to be my first. Bill said he would cherish that memory every day along with all of our other memories, and he had intended to send me every color of the rainbow to make a new memory.

I wasn't talking to Eric, so I didn't feel I needed to offer him an explanation, and they were particularly beautiful. Pledging that this would be the last bunch I would accept. I threw the note away, not wanting anyone, namely Eric, to know these had come from Bill, but in a way the flowers had brightened my day, even though it came from a dark place, I couldn't explain it, but they helped me cope with what I had lost and what I had gone through in the last few days.

When the flowers opened, I felt like there was hope. Even after they were cut, the flowers still bloomed into beautiful roses. It reminded me of my situation and made me think that even when people were cut down, and they felt there was no point, there was hope. The roses proved that we could live on and still bloom, like other roses that hadn't yet been cut.

Fortunately I didn't have to worry about covering up his little gesture any more because he stopped sending them after that. I was partially relieved and partially curious as to why he stopped, but my new motto had been, I had my own life to worry about.

The rest of the week was a long and grueling one. I was learning how to develop a tough skin though. Eventually the rumors died down once my boss, my friends, co-workers, and the patrons of Merlottes found some new gossip to feed on. I could have kissed Lafayette when he started dating some famous Saints lineman.

Tara still wouldn't let it go though. She assured me she was on my side and if she saw Bill again shed kick his ass too. I didn't play into it because I thought she was making a mountain out of a molehill, everyone was, especially my pest of a roommate.

Who, I still wasn't ready to talk to. No matter how much Pam's words tried to guilt me into spilling. I had mastered the art of avoiding him, which was a hard feat considering we lived together. But I had invited Jason to stay for a couple days bribing him with free food and boosting his ego by telling him I wanted him around for my safety, and then the next night I stayed at Tara's. Not because Bill advised me to, but she offered me a night of chick flicks, pizza, ice cream and tequila, and there was no way I was saying no to that after the week I had.

I was actually more relieved than anything that I hadn't heard from Bill in quite a few days. Some friend, I thought in irony, wondering why I even cared. Then we had tall dark and bruiting moping around like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Well fuck him, fuck them all, I thought. The tequila went down nicely despite it all.

Then it was time to get my stitches out and I was as good as new. Which brings us to the Friday before my Gran's return.

I had begged Sam to close; I didn't want to go home. I didn't have anywhere to hide out tonight. But he assured me he had it covered. I'm sure he thought he was doing me a favor by excusing me from a night of drunken red necks and cat calls, but going back home at 9pm didn't exactly make things easier on me. Tara was still at work, Jason was out with his motley crew and Gran was still in Haiti. Man I was going to be happy to see her when she got home on Sunday, I thought.

I rounded the corner and pulled up my driveway and turned off the storm alert that had been blaring on my radio for the last 15 minutes. Yes I could see the thunder and lightning in the distance, it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that we might be getting a few T storms rolling through.

I sighed and got out of my car smelling the air and I knew it was close. It was that just before it rains clean smell. If I hadn't been so tormented I knew Id otherwise sleep great tonight. Maybe I could try, I thought. I quietly muffled my keys in my hand and tip toed up the stairs, hating to feel like I had to sneak into my own house. I knew I would be immensely relieved when Eric had gone. The tension between us was seething and I just needed a moment to breathe.

I didn't see Eric right away, only hoping he had decided to call it an early night and go to bed. Or maybe he was out with Pam or one of his friends, whom I had yet to meet. His car was here though so my thoughts were hopeful that he was still keeping his distance. I clicked the door open thinking even though I couldn't see him, that didn't mean he couldn't find me. I knew my room was my safe harbor and I planned to hole up inside for the evening, but I needed some refreshments first, something nice and strong, like lemons and tequila which I had recently found a new fondness for after sharing a few shots with Tara the other night. My nerves really did need cooling, so I tiptoed in not even bothering to flick on the light, and then I heard the cat meowing at the back door.

It was unlocked and the screen door was tapping open and shut against the door jam. I wondered who had been so irresponsible to leave this door like this, but I shrugged it off. If I yelled at Eric about it, Id just have to talk to him, which was something I didn't want to do.

I knew the storm was coming but it wasn't here yet. Suspecting the cat just wanted to get out one last run before it hit I entertained him. I went to let him out noting how picturesque it was out here despite the door. The calm before the storm. I thought, listening to the whistling winds as they blew through the trees. I saw the sky light up in the distance and stepped out a moment to watch the show.

That's when I stopped dead in my tracks realizing Eric was sitting there, his long legs hanging over the edge of the my Gran's old wicker chair, wearing just a white vee neck tee and jeans, he looked so stoic. Like he belonged in a painting with the storm in the background. It was as if he was telepathically conversing with it.

I swallowed feeling nervous all of the sudden, knowing the tempest was brewing outside, but it also felt like it was brewing between us. There was a loud clap of thunder and the cat meowed frightened and ran back into the house. He must have realized it was about to pour, I thought. But it was loud enough to announce my presence and then Eric looked straight at me. He sat up as the recognition set in and he looked like he was about to say something, both of us frozen in time, but I freaked out.

"Sorry." I mumbled and quickly darted back inside.

"Sookie!" I heard him speak from the porch but I didn't want to talk yet, I wasn't ready to confront him, too nervous, and too chicken shit, I rushed past the kitchen.

I heard him open up the door behind me and knew if I had gone to dig through my purse for my car keys I would lose my lead. I couldn't go up to my room or he would just wait outside the door, and he was relentless. I knew that much.

So I went out the front door, looking from left to right as a roll of thunder crackled in the distance, and the lightning lit up the western sky. Illuminating the area above the lake, I knew where I needed to go.

The air filled my lungs and I felt like a kid again taking it in stride.

"Sookie!" I heard him call again from the front porch, and that's when I booked it.

I tried to put as much distance between me and that house as quickly as I could, but out of the corner of my eye I could see Eric making large strides towards me about 100 yards back. I ran faster in an attempt to lose him.

"Sookie, It's going to rain!" He exclaimed but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of an answer, my feet moving faster, as I tore through the high grass on the western side of the property.

And then just as if the Gods ruled in his favor, I felt the pitter-patter of rain hit my face. It made me angry, because I wanted to have control of my own life. I had been fighting so hard lately and it seemed like no matter what I did, I was either punished or scrutinized, and I was sick of it. If I wanted to go down to the lake when it was raining, I was going to GODDAMN do it!

I slipped my flip flops off because running was easier without them my bare feet cool and cushioned by the long blades of grass making better ground as I neared the dock and, I knew exactly what I had to do to lose Eric.

"Sookie!" His voice was closer now, but it only motivated my adrenaline further and I jumped on the dock, and ran towards the rowboat!

"Sookie please, I need to talk to you!"

"I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!" I spat back over my shoulder trying to scare him away, my anger growing, stern with confidence because I was almost there, I was almost to the boat, I just had to untie the rope, now hearing Eric's heavy feet tap behind me I yanked on it hard and it was free, I only had to jump in holding onto the edge and that's when I felt Eric grab my arm.

"Get away from me!"

I shrieked, jerking away from his grip, which caused me to lose my footing, and then I felt my body tipping towards the water. Eric tried to pull me back, but my weight had already tipped the scales and we went toppling into the cold lake below.

The water filled my lungs and I fought to rise to the surface terrified that I couldn't breathe under this much water and then I felt his arms pull me up with him. I pushed him away and frantically reached for the end of the dock, needing something stable to hold onto, something that wasn't Eric, and that's when I felt my feet collide against the sand. The water had to only have been about 3 feet deep at this point and I rolled my eyes because my earlier panic of drowning had been all for nothing.

"Why do you always insist on doing everything the hard way?"

He asked me breathless and drenched from his botched rescue attempt no doubt, and I glared at him giving him a 'don't start with me' look.

"I was trying to get away." I confessed coughing again he patted my back as I moved further away from him pulling myself up to a full standing position.

"I can see that. You think I wouldn't have jumped in after your renegade row boat?"

I looked back at him oddly in question, he looked like he was trying to make another joke again, but I was in no mood and I shook my head and replied sarcastically…

"Well I guess at least that way I wouldn't be drenched."

Now it was Eric's turn to roll his eyes and he shook his head and began to turn back towards the shore…

"Yes, I realize now that it was a mistake, Ill see you when you're done festering like a petulant child."

Suddenly, I felt my nerves light up again, and I grew angry. I was supposed to be mad at him wasn't I? He practically just single handedly drowned me. Not to mention his treatment of me last week was totally arrogant and condescending.

"You're walking away from me? Is this a joke? After everything you did to me?"

He chuckled and looked back at me in challenge, his deep blue eyes tempestuous bordering on the verge of something more he remarked shaking his head in disbelief…

"You're one to talk Sookie Stackhouse!"

"What do you mean?" I dared to ask him and he shook his head, his eyes doing crazy things to my insides…

"First of all, you're mad at me for chasing after you after you take off in the middle of a thunderstorm to go row a boat, you do realize how crazy that sound's don't you? And you actually have the Cajones to sit here and criticize me for defending you to that Dickwad, when you've been accepting flowers from him!"

I narrowed my eyes furiously, he didn't even know me, he had no right to call me crazy, not liking the turn this conversation was taking. And, was he spying on me? Or digging through the trash now? He had some nerve.

"I don't know who…"

"Don't even try to tell me they aren't from him, C'mon Sookie, who else would be sending you flowers daily after you kicked him into the dog house? Your boss? Your brother?"

He remarked sharply and, that's when I went from angry to pissed. Deciding to get a few things off my chest as well as I followed him to the shallow end…

"Yes, Well when one has been reduced to a poor suicidal rape victim in the town gossip, its nice to know someone out there still loves me."

He chuckled again and shook his head…

"You call that love?"

"What would you call it?"

"How about a guilt trip?"

"He cares about me!"

"Oh yeah I can see how he cares!"

"Its better than being pushed into the arms of your ex girlfriend when the going got tough!"

"You're blaming me for that?" He asked clearly outraged and I shook my head…

"It's what you think isn't it? You didn't believe me, instead you went to your girlfriend and tried to get her to do all that therapist mumbo jumbo because you pitied me, right?"

He looked genuinely hurt by my words and, then he stepped up closer to me, so close now I actually felt small standing next to him and he replied…

"I don't pity you Sookie."

I took in a deep breath and dared to meet his dark glint.

"I only care for your well being, I only want what was best for you. If you would rather spend the rest of your days in denial that he ever…"

I interrupted him.

"Don't even say it, if you say that word Ill kick you in the balls so hard you wont be able to see straight, don't think I wont do it!" I threatened.

Eric paused for a long moment, the air heavy between us, until finally he admitted…

"Sookie, I'm sorry."

I looked at him stunned because I didn't think I would ever hear those words come from his mouth. But he wasn't done, so I closed my gaped mouth and listened…

"I was concerned for you and I thought that Pam could help, but I should have talked to you first."

I looked back at him, trying to push the emotional reminders from that day back down, but they were rising up to the surface despite my attempts…

I simply nodded and looked down at the black as ink water below my waist. I imagined it was an abyss, a black abyss that I would drown in if I wasn't careful.

I wanted to tell him that I was sorry too, that I understood his reaction even though he had been the salt to my wounds over the last week, I didn't blame him. I couldn't, as hard as I tried, but for some reason the words didn't come out.

There was another shot of thunder in the distance, followed by a clap of lightning and Eric replied sternly…

"We better get out of here."

He looked back at me and I looked at him and I suddenly became very aware of how his wet shirt clung to his rock hard chest, like liquid satin the water glistened, his hard nipples pushed through, and his hair was deliciously wet framing the sides of his strong face. His eyes lucid and lips lush as I felt that warmth in my cheeks and stirring in my loins return.

"Eric?" I asked him, suddenly forgetting what I wanted to say as I looked at him, into those dark azure piercing eyes.

What the hell was happening to me? I felt like everything I had been trying to repress for the last week, last 2 weeks, lust, passion, aggression, desire, was fighting me to get out.

But I was fighting it. I was a smart sensible and virtuous woman, despite my behavior up until this point. I couldn't think such things; it went against what I stood for. Against everything that had happened up until this point.

"You're ready to go right?" He asked me in question, the seriousness in his eyes making my insides melt.

I nodded in agreement, my chest heaving and heart hammering knowing we needed to get back to the warmth and shelter of the house.

He took my hand.

But I couldn't move.

I dropped his hand

And then…

He turned around to face me and I jumped into his arms. My lips attacked his, our mouths crashing together like the storm and we met in the place where waves hit land. The heat shot through me and I felt the desire the need, and the yearning take over ten fold as I wrapped my arms around him and his lips took mine.

There was no time for thinking. I had to prove to him and to myself that I was in control, I wanted to stay here with him, I was in charge of my own life, I wasn't some child, I did what I wanted, and I wanted this.

Like 2 forces of nature colliding, he shoved his tongue in my mouth and I started to tug at the hem of his shirt, pulling it up over the top of his head as he came back down and kissed me again.

We were both drenched but that didn't stop us. His hand moved to my breast and I quickly unzipped my soaked waitress uniform guiding his hand to the clasp in my bra. He set my breasts free and I felt a shudder pass through me as his hand found it's way to my sensitive peaks.

I unzipped his denims, the heavy fabric sticking to his skin and gasped when my hand found his hard desire waiting for me. I kissed him again as he lifted me in his arms. I felt a rush of blood rise to my head in dizzy delight as he carried me, happy to find the heat dampness my thighs had returned. There was a time I thought I might never feel that again after what I had done, punishment for my wicked sinful ways, and I kissed him harder shoving my tongue in his mouth in thanks and gratitude.

We were both half clothed as he carried me out of the water past the bank of sand up into the grass. At the moment I would have gone anywhere with him, but I wanted this to happen here. For some reason it felt more meaningful here, despite the rainstorm. I mean we were already soaked to the bone, couldn't get much wetter right?

"Make love to me?" I whispered placing my hands along his smooth chest, making it more a request than a question. His dark blue eyes flicked with mine in reservation and I nodded my head. I wanted this, I wanted him. I had to get back up on the horse again and Eric was the one who could give me that push.

I felt his hardness rise up and press against my panties, like it had the first night and I helped him shrugging out of the top of my waitress uniform, my breasts on full display now. And he replied gruffly…

"I don't have a condom."

I shook my head, wanting to get this formality out of the way, that was the last thing on my mind, I was wild and free like the wind, and this was no time for rational thought and I replied kissing his neck…

"It's okay, I'm on the pill."

I had just started birth control after Bill and I had discussed taking our relationship to the next level, so in my mind, that was enough.

His eyes turned lucid as he looked down kissing me once on the mouth as his calloused thumbs came up to caress my hard and sensitive nipples. My heart was hammering in my chest and he carefully lowered me down to the ground. Spreading his tee out behind me like a gentleman, I had to smile at his carefulness and then he laid me down over it. I felt his warm hands grab the waist of my crumpled uniform and slowly pull it down, along with my cotton panties. He came back up to look at me lying naked before him and I heard him take in a sharp breath. My whole body felt warm, alive and buzzing under his stare.

"Are you sure?"

He asked me in concern. Of course I wanted none of that, no worry about my well being or reference to anything prior to this night. I was fine and I was going to be even better once he stopped talking and put his dick inside me.

Instead of replying vocally I reached my hand down and pulled his throbbing manhood out of his pants, massaging it up and down and with one nod in assurance I spread my legs open.

My heart was racing again, suddenly nervous that he might not want me, if he thought I was damaged goods, or too forward, maybe no man would want me now that I was no longer a virgin. But much to my joy, he kicked his shoes off, followed by his drenched denims, and then he was back to hovering over me. His hand smoothed over my skin dancing around the shadows as if he was studying every crevice and curve to my delight followed by his gaze and then I felt his eyes drop to my sheath.

I looked down with him and could tell he was looking for bruising, but there was nothing left, that night was gone forever. I guided his face back up to look at me and assured him…

"I'm ready."

His face fell and he looked at me with a longing I had never seen before. My chest heaved in anticipation, feeling chills the kind that felt like tiny electric shocks running through my body as the static in the atmosphere danced around our bodies. It was the only thing separating the electric sexual tension between us just like the storm.

Then he smothered his lips down over mine and it happened.

I felt myself unravel the moment his sex touched mine. Unlike Bill he was slow and painstakingly careful as he lowered himself inside my wet sheath inch by inch, stretching and expanding my tight walls. I gasped when he found the point that no other man had reached and then my body began to shake as he hit some magic place that made me feel hot and cold at the same time, then he pulled back a little and hit the spot again. I barely had energy to respond my body uncontrolled by the pleasure that had taken over as he slid out and back in, out and in, back and forth, like a vacuum cleaner sucking out my insides and leaving nothing behind he had such a strong force, but it was ecstasy.

Finally when the blurry pleasure left my eyes and I could see straight, something rose up from inside me. Something beyond my control, the urge for power, dominance, self-expression and empowerment, like a force of nature resided in me. I began to thrust with him, pulling as he pushed pushing as he pulled, I felt him pause for a brief moment to make sure I was okay I assumed and then I turned the tables and flipped him over on his back. Don't ask me where I found the strength to flip a 225 lb man over but I did. I felt like a phoenix rising up from its ashes, and I kissed him once hotly on the mouth before I began to ride him.

It was like a rebirth, it felt so unbelievable. Eric's thrusts met mine as my hips rose and fell over him. I felt wild and free, the rain pelting down on our hot and burning bodies scalding us as the fire blazed between us. And then I felt something stir from deep inside, it was uncontrollable, like a tidal wave it was powerful and strong and unstoppable. Eric cried hoarsely as he sat up and clenched my ass in his large hands pulling me over him…

"Look at me!"

I opened my eyes and my pupils met his knowing I was on the brink of my release. And that's when I felt it. It wasn't just my ecstasy, I felt a stirring of something more, something indefinitely more as the dark stormy blue orbs of the night sky reflected from his gaze into mine. At that moment, I felt it change. Like something that had been dormant inside me, buried deep down inside, came up to the surface emerging gloriously to complete the metamorphosis of a girl transcending to womanhood.

I clung to him, my hands clenching his shoulders and felt another rupture, my seal now broken, like an explosion in my loins as I cried out in pleasure one final time. It was unbridled bliss in its purest form as my orgasm and bodily fluids released as they blended around him. And then I felt something warm shoot up inside me, causing my body to shiver with delightful numbness. I knew he had found his release at the same time I found mine; I looked into his eyes and never felt freer.

I never knew it could be like that, I never knew it could feel so, so, the only word that came to mind was mind-blowing. Of all times to think about it, I fell back on Pam's words, and I thought she was right.

I would never forget this. It was like an out of body out of mind experience. He was just what I needed to get my mind off everything else.

He kissed me again and my body lit up like the Vegas strip, electrified and humming, and totally charged. I felt like a new woman. I kissed him back enjoying the sparks that continued to shoot through me as he ran his hand down my back.

After a few moments once our post coital bodies had returned back to earth and we got our breaths back, Eric smiled and mused softly looking into my eyes...

"I think I can safely say, this has never happened before."

I couldn't help but smirk and looked back at him with smiling eyes, a newfound confidence and I asked him smiling…

"Don't tell me you were a virgin too?"

He laughed and then licked his lips and looked into my eyes and shook his head…

"No, but I can assure you, I don't think Ill ever forget this. I mean being jumped outside in the middle of a rainstorm by my…my…"

"My what?" I asked him, scared of what he might say. My heart still beating heavily in suspense but I also worried that he might view me differently than I viewed him.

He looked at me with that intense stare and I felt my insides simmer again.

"My room mate?" He asked testing the waters.

I smiled softly and felt a small wave of relief.

I know he was kidding around earlier, but Eric did have a point I thought. In truth I didn't know if Id even recognize myself in the mirror after this. This was something Id never have done even in my wildest fantasies. And I was still on top of him!

Yes, something was most definitely different with me. Part of it scared me and part of it excited me. The only problem is, I wasn't sure which part I was supposed to be listening to. Not to mention, what did this mean now? Eric and I had gone from friends, friends who occasionally made out to this? I no longer knew what we were. Roommates wasnt really a serious answer. Before this that little question would have driven me crazy, let alone the sexual experience we just shared. In truth, the intensity of it scared me a little bit. Did I just book my one-way ticket to Lucifer's town?

It seemed like everything that held meaning before, which I valued in my life, was somehow changing right before my eyes.


	10. Chapter 10

**AN**: Whew so those crazy kids got carried away with that storm huh? Hehe. Now for the aftermath. ;) Thanks so much to everyone for the awesome reviews and for reading and I hope you like this chapter as well. Enjoy! :)

_**Chapter 10-Touch and Go**_

We got back to the house, feeling a little strange both of us half naked in grass stained clothing, but Eric certainly wasn't shy, and he didn't give me much of an opportunity to second guess my actions, insisting I go up and start a shower while he turned on the heat. My stomach flipped and I felt butterflies, and I wondered what I was doing for a minute, but then Eric was back sending my nerve endings on fire again.

I had to admit, he certainly rocked the wet denims, dirt covered chest, no shirt look, and the way he was eyeing me in his tee, I would have to gather, he didn't mind that I was wearing his clothing either.

"I turned the heat on." He replied with that smug smile that I just wanted to wipe off his face, but I also wanted that smile to be replaced by his lips on mine.

"Good." I replied and reached in to turn on the shower…

"And I turned on the shower." I added countering him.

"Good."

He mimicked with a smile and I felt my heart pound faster as he leaned in and whispered in my ear…

"Because your covered head to toe in grass (he pulled a strand out of my hair and then he met my gaze adding,) and me."

I felt my skin turn into gooseflesh as my eyes flicked with his and he leaned back in, his breath coated my skin, and then he licked my neck. My knees nearly buckled there, if it hadn't been for his incredibly strong arms holding me up.

The steam started to fill the room and he leaned in and kissed the other side of my neck and confessed…

"I only wish I could leave my shirt on you."

"Why, to save time on your laundry?"

I asked him coyly turning around to face him and he smirked, glancing down at my chest. As if on command, they pebbled for him and he leaned in, one hand caressing the side of one breast replying with a smile as he licked his lips. And then he kissed each swell of flesh over the tee and added…

"Among other things."

_Gah._

Was the only comprehensible thought I could sort out of my mind as I looked into his smoldering blue eyes, and I secretly wondered what was happening to me? I felt like a young woman trapped in the body of an old woman, trapped in the body of a teenager. I was all over the place. I knew this wasn't like me at all. I thought out everything with painstaking precision, I planned, I was modest and reserved, and above all, a lady.

I wasn't the type of girl to cast it all aside, let alone even consider taking a shower with a man, naked, not to mention whatever else Eric had planned. But before my mental thoughts had any more time to question things and object his lips met mine and he pulled me up into his arms, pressing me back against the tile wall of my bathroom, he kissed me with a sense of urgency. In that moment I knew he needed me just as badly as I needed him.

He set me down and I tugged off my shirt as he shrugged off his pants and then like two magnets, I was in his arms again. He looked at me as if to ask permission to enter and I nodded, wanting to go into that shower more than anything, wanting to do the vertical mambo more than anything. It was a strange sensation to do what I wanted, enjoy myself, and be enjoyed.

Up until now I always thought there was a consequence to every action, whether it be good or bad. I still thought that, but wasn't so sure the reaction was so immediate. It would probably all come back to me in a couple of days, but for now, it was nice to be the one holding the cards for once, nice to have some fun, I thought, knowing I could get used to this kind of fun.

I realize up until this point I viewed sex as more of a chore, something I wanted to get done and over with, but that was before Eric. He was something else.

I was wanted and desired, I was large and in charge. I wasn't going to screw it up this time with emotions, I wanted to ride the high as long as it lasted. That funny feeling I got when he looked at me was all part of the excitement. If it was possible to be scared shitless and thrilled at the same time, I was.

Eric took his time in that shower, his mouth doing devious things to my body. I was feeling things I never felt before, pleasure I didn't think was humanly possible and I wanted to return that, exploring his chiseled chest with my mouth, as my hands dropped down to squeeze his perfect ass. He groaned and pulled me closer to him for a hot and scorching kiss.

In return I brought my hands down to his hardness and he brought out the liquid soap and then I finally understood what he meant by cleaning up the mess in here.

-------------------

The storm had gotten stronger and I could hear the pellets of water banging down on the roof. Thankful Eric had just replaced the couple of loose shingles earlier today I felt safe, and my wet body was now dry and warm, to my delight.

Don't get me wrong, the shower part wasn't bad, neither was much else. In fact my body was still unwinding from the things we did in that shower. We couldn't stay in there forever, besides the water was starting to get cold so I suggested we reconvene down in the kitchen. I was starving.

I went to my room to find some real clothes and Eric went down to his in just a towel. God, all I could think was if my Gran were here she'd have a heart attack after she found out what we had been doing under her roof, in that shower.

Once I had a few moments to myself, away from the sexual haze and the man who sent my pulse soaring, I was able to think rationally for a moment.

I felt like when I was with Eric, I was in a dream. A fabulous fantasy dream, but I knew once the clothes went back on, we had to face reality again. I was still Sookie Stackhouse, I still had my skeletons, I still had failed in my one attempt at a relationship with Bill, which disheartened me and made me want to disappear from the world. I still was a screwed up little girl inside.

There was that nagging thought that what if this was just some stupid infatuation that would go cold and cease to exist once morning came. What if I was just a conquest to him, what if I scared him away with all my freak of nature issues? He would eventually realize what I was like once he really got to know me. Once he found out what kind of person I was, and why I loathe that person.

But then there was that something else there too. That something different, and new, yet spellbinding to me. I couldn't shake that either. I sighed realizing I needed to stop thinking so much and just enjoy this. You only live once right? Like my Gran says.

_So why was I so scared?_

I noticed Eric had opted to keep his shirt off, and the waist of his boxer shorts was just low enough to emphasize that perfect ass. I bit my lip to take my attention off my new favorite anatomy specimen and turned to meet Eric's gaze in question.

Eric asked me what I was hungry for and I opened the fridge and looked inside.

He peered over my shoulder and I felt those tingles again from his closeness, but he simply smiled and started pulling stuff out.

"I know exactly what we can have." He replied with a smug smirk handing me two potatoes and I looked at him in question as he began to pile stuff on the side…

"Okay Swedish Chef, are you going to clue me in?" I asked him and he laughed…

"Yes, you can be my sous chef. Here, cut these up."

I raised my brows but he paid no attention already pulling out a cutting board for an onion and a half clove of garlic.

"So tonight, our menu will contain, Pytt I Panna, translated into English it means a little bit of everything in a pan. It's a left over dish."

I raised my brow in question and asked him…

"So is this something you make often?"

He looked at me and a sheepish smile crept over his face, he shook his head and replied…

"No if I was doing this right, Id get all the proper ingredients, lefsa, lingonberries…but we have to make due with what you have…"

I creased my brows in confusion and asked him…

"I thought you said it was a left over dish, why do you need to get more ingredients if you are making left over's?"

Eric laughed and he looked at me through the sides of his eyes and asked me…

"Have you always been this inquisitive?"

I glanced at him and replied strong with confidence…

"Yes, what's the matter, are you afraid your sous chef might try to out cook you if she knows too much?"

I saw one side of his mouth turn up in a smirk and Eric replied while chopping up his onion…

"I think you can already out cook me, but if its answers you want, its answers you'll get."

I smiled satisfied it felt like I had won this debate and I asked him taking him up on his offer for a little Q & A, because there were some things I was curious about…

"So do you miss it, do you miss Sweden?"

His smile straightened and suddenly I wondered if I had touched a nerve. We were doing good too. I hadn't even thought about any of that Bill business for quite some time and I was beginning to believe we might be able to co-exist in the same house for the next couple months, but now I worried that there may be things that were taboo for Eric as well…

"Sometimes I do." He replied truthfully, cubing some pieces of ham now, he was concentrating very hard on making his lines straight, and admitted…

"I used to make this with my mother, she'd always serve it with lefsa and lingonberry jam."

Suddenly I felt like crap. I acted like live wire when he went to my sensitive place and here I was doing the exact same thing in poking at him. It didn't seem fair.

He drizzled some oil in Gran's cast iron pan, let it heat up and then he tossed the onions and garlic in.

"It smells heavenly." I remarked truthfully, because it did. I looked back at him offering him a small smile and Eric replied…

"Yes, it's good, I don't make this as often as Id like, but I'm sure you will enjoy it."

I smiled and nodded my head…

"I'm starving after the night we had."

I cast him a coy smirk and he smiled again. Moving closer to him, I finished the last potato and he tossed it in the pan along with the ham.

"So what's it like, I've never even been out of Louisiana before." I admitted sure I must sound like some country bumpkin, but Eric simply replied with a smile…

"It's colder, much colder…"

I scrunched my nose, not sure I liked the sound of that.

"Oh don't worry, they are all crazy up there, we jump into frozen lakes in our underwear and roll around in the snow naked, but other than that it's not much different than here, family is important to us, as is education, the economy, healthcare, protecting those we love..."

I creased my brows, my gaze flicking with his for some reason I felt emotion stir inside me when he mentioned protecting those he loved because he had protected me, and I nodded, swallowing I felt the need to redirect the conversation to something a little easier to digest and I asked him kiddingly……

"So you are basically saying you Swedes live just like the polar bears?"

He smirked, and reached over somehow finding the ticklish spot under my arm to get back at me and I squeaked.

He snorted and laughed making fun of me he replied…

"I don't even want to know what that sound was."

I couldn't help but giggle as he turned towards me and assured me seriously…

"Maybe some day you will see snow, real snow, not this pathetic dusting of frost you get here, but real accumulation, and you'll realize that you flamingos got the short stick."

I laughed at his new nickname and replied with a shake of my head…

"No way, I love the sun, the sun loves me, and I hope we will be together forever."

He raised a brow and then Eric replied smartly…

"Yes, well I hope you two will be very happy, roasting together like dried up prunes…"

I smiled and added smartly…

"Thanks, I plan on it."

I winked at him and he proceeded to pull me back to him for what I only could assume was a smoldering kiss, I was lost in his eyes desperate and panting in need, he met my gaze lustfully, which did funny things to my insides, and then he looked at me and replied…

"Eggs."

Not that my mind had turned to goo or anything but, I hadn't the slightest idea what he was talking about…

"Huh?" I asked him, eyes still lucid and he smirked, asking me…

"I need two eggs, would you be a sweet little prune and go get them for me."

I rolled my eyes, now finally understanding what he was doing. He had some sort of spell over me where he could get whatever he wanted from me with one smoldering look, and he was certainly well aware of this little fact.

Sticking out my tongue at him, I left reluctantly and he turned around to stir the pan and add some dill from my grandmothers herb garden on the windowsill.

A few minutes later I was starting down at the oddest looking concoction of food, but it smelled like heaven. He looked at me with a smirk on his face and replied smartly…

"Dig in."

I looked down at the sunny side up egg over a pile of what we southerners called hash took a little piece from the side, lifted the fork into my mouth and felt my tongue water around it.

Oh my god! This was…This was…

"So what do you think?" He asked still watching me as I closed my eyes and imagined this is what heaven tasted like and I simply nodded my head shoveling another forkful in my mouth…

He smiled smugly and asked me jokingly as he swallowed his bite…

"So better than sex huh?"

My eyes opened wide and I coughed up what hadn't gone down my throat, because he was openly discussing what just happened between us like it was as casual conversation about the weather. I wasn't prepared. I looked at him with face red and took a swig of my lemonade. Finally composing myself I asked him, daring to take the bait…

"Do you think it's better than sex?"

His brows rose and he replied coyly…

"Nothing is better than sex, especially with you."

I cleared my throat, my stomach doing all kinds of crazy motions, wondering where all this was coming from. Did someone slip something into Eric's drink earlier too?

"Erm yeah." I replied at a loss for what to say, I bet he said that to all the girls. I took another big swig of my juice, and smiled politely, feeling nervous all of the sudden, like I was some gawky teenager out on my first date with the star quarterback. I was in so over my head it wasn't funny.

He raised his brows and looked back at me knowingly and I looked back at him, a hint of a smile on my face. There it was again, that strange feeling.

I felt anxious all of the sudden and he added...

"Well maybe we'll just have to try to out do ourselves to up the ante then, death by chocolate perhaps, there's a chocolate and wine festival in Monroe this weekend, or maybe the State Fair next week, I hear they are even frying up cherry pie slices this time, could be better than sex, who knows."

He winked at me and I smiled, but then my thoughts turned back to the gist of what he was saying, going out together in public? I suddenly felt very nervous, like we were walking on egg shells. I couldn't help but remember my Gran, she would be back tomorrow, I had to work tomorrow, which meant I had to deal with the same old crap different day, I'm not quite sure if I was ready for this yet, what would everyone think if I jumped from Bill to Eric in only a weeks time?

Not to mention, could I handle another week of whispers behind my back. He was an outsider, a newcomer, I had heard all kinds of rumors from Eric was in the witness protection program to he was some love child of Adele's. Of course I knew it was all bull puckey, but that didn't change how it was reflected off me. I had to work hard enough just to reach normal. If I was dating Eric, forget normal, forget any kind of social acceptance, plus I had no idea what we were doing.

I was almost positive that once his 3 months were up, Eric was gone, most likely gone forever, which made me realize we had to take this slow, very slow.

Finally, I replied cautiously…

"Listen, Eric, maybe before we go any further, we should set some general guidelines with each other."

"Guidelines?" He asked me curiously and I nodded my head in reply, explaining…

"Well in light of this town knowing every body's business and my Gran coming home on Sunday, I think it might be better if we keep this thing on the down low."

He set down his glass and looked at me intently. I felt strange talking about this with him, but well, I wasn't going to be walked on anymore, I had to take control for once, and I kept my eyes unwavering as I met his gaze…

"You are talking about keeping our sexual relationship private?" He asked me. I was relieved he had referred to it as a sexual relationship, I wasn't ready for a full fledged thing yet and I nodded my head encouragingly…

"I think that might be wise."

"So in your mind how would this work exactly?" His eyes dug into mine.

I wasn't sure I wanted to be put on the spot, but I had taken the reigns of my own free will, so I explained…

"Well I guess we'd have to figure it out but I think while we are in public, we behave as we always have and while we are in private, after we're sure it's just us, we can be ourselves."

I tried to sound bright, because I was enjoying myself with Eric and I didn't want to lose this, but in the same sense, I had to draw the line somewhere or I would end up right where I did with Bill, alone and unhappy. I couldn't let my heart get mixed up in this.

I couldn't read his expression, but as his glance locked with mine, the disappointment was quite clear and he replied flatly…

"So you want us to be fuck buddies?"

My smile straightened, hating the sound of it when he put it like that. I creased my brows and shook my head, and offered trying to sell this…

"No, I wouldn't call it that, Id say we were more like lovers, secret lovers."

His brow lowered again, and I felt the pits in my stomach clench. I was worried he might not want to do this and I didn't want to lose this, what we had because it was the first really good thing I had experienced in a long time, something I wanted to experience again, biting my lip I awaited his reply on baited breath.

"This would make you happy?" He asked me simply.

And I looked at him at a loss for words. After everything that happened, he was asking if this would make me happy? I didn't get it. But he was completely serious, and finally I nodded my head and replied…

"Yes it would."

Although for some reason at that moment I felt a pang of sadness run through me. I wasn't sure if it was because I missed Bill or I wanted something else. Either way that wasn't going to happen right now, the more realistic I was, the better off Id be.

I smiled took another bite and then noticed the clock above the kitchen sink read 2:30am.

"Oh crap!" I exclaimed and Eric looked back at me in concern…

"What?" He asked.

"It's 2:30, I have to work early tomorrow…"

He looked back behind him and sat up a little straighter as if in realization he remarked…

"I have to go visit my uncle tomorrow, he's got a Doctor appointment in the morning."

I bit my lip unsure of where that left us and I replied with a swallow…

"I guess we should go to sleep after this then."

He nodded his head and looked down at his hands, both of us clearly unsure, navigating our way through this together. I shoveled the rest of my dinner in my mouth, chugged down the rest of the lemonade and then tried to scoop up the dishes and bring them to the sink, noting he never finished the rest of his meal as he lifted his plate up and joined me.

"Here, let me help you." Eric insisted grabbing the pitcher of lemonade from my already over heaped arms…

"Thanks."

I replied with a smile and he answered smoothly…

"No problem."

I figured the dishes could wait till I got home tomorrow, or maybe if I had a little time before my shift. We worked together to clean up as much as we could, Eric scraping the left over's in the trash and then we found ourselves out in the hallway. I assumed Eric would go back to his room, and I would go up to my room. I looked at him and asked him needing to be sure…

"We're good right?"

He looked at me for a moment, and I wondered what was going through his mind, until he finally nodded and replied…

"Yeah, we're good."

I smiled and nodded, feeling relief in that moment.

"Okay, night then."

"Good night." He replied simply, his eyes never leaving mine.

I blinked not sure what to do, I had never been in this situation before. I felt like I was thinking too much but I couldn't help it, I was paranoid and god it felt so awkward. But as usual Eric bridged the gap effortlessly, bringing me back to the ground.

He leaned in and kissed me sweetly. I felt my stomach flip and I swooned in his arms as his tongue brushed mine once, twice, reigniting those earlier sparks, then he pulled away and looked back at me with a smile…

"Good night Sookie."

What could I say, the man knew how to say goodnight. He took a step towards his room, and I watched him leave with dreamy eyes, feeling a yearning and regret for what I didn't know.

He looked back at me one last time and that something inside me that snapped before came back again.

I caught his hand in mine and brought him with me back upstairs as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

* * *

I woke up in the morning to the sound of my alarm. I was groggy and tired, and I peeled one eye open to look at the ridiculously loud buzzing clock noting it was almost 9:30.

I shot up realizing I must have slept through the first 5 alarms, although I didn't know how that was humanly possible and then I saw the indent in the pillow next to mine and blushed. Oh right, that's how.

It's not what you think, I didn't conduct in any hanky panky after we went to bed, I just knew Id sleep a lot better if he was next to me. And I was right, I did.

I wasn't sure how we'd manage sleeping arrangements once Gran was back. I supposed we'd go back to the way things were before, but Id be lying if I said that thought disappointed me.

I had an hour left before I had to get ready for work so I figured, I could finish those dishes and enjoy a little breakfast. There wasn't much time for anything else.

So I went downstairs after brushing my teeth and hair and realized that son of a gun already did them. I flipped my eyes up and then I found a note on the counter, my heart nearly stopped when I saw what it was next to. A vase an old antique vase holding lilac's from the garden. Purple, fuchsia, pink and white. And it smelled euphoric. My heart started to beat faster as I smiled and opened up the envelope.

_"My dearest Lover, or should I say secret lover, I can't wait till I see you again tonight, perhaps you will agree to accompany me for a picnic dinner when you return home from work? Don't worry, I have just the spot, where no one can find us…_

_Oh, and this message will self destruct in 5 seconds. Don't burn your hands._

_xoxo-E"_

I couldn't help but giggle my smile quite apparent. So he wanted to take me on a picnic did he? That was so cute, I thought, the suspense of where he was taking me almost unbearable but I also knew he wouldn't disappoint.

I tucked the note away in my pocket smelled the sweet flowers and then fixed some breakfast.

------------------

Four hours later I had just given the check to the last of the lunch rush and Tara had served Andy Bellefleur a pitcher of beer when Arlene came bowling in announcing…

"I'm getting married, I'm getting married!"

"Jesus, again?" Tara muttered rolling her eyes she bit back sarcastically as Dawn and the other waitresses went to go examine the ring…

"I think the fact that this has got to be groom number 5 or is it 6 now? Escapes her." Tara replied. I chuckled, genuinely happy for Arlene, but I couldn't help but feel a pang of emotion wash over me when I remembered Bill had proposed to me just a couple weeks ago. It was probably the first and last time that would ever happen for me, I thought sadly.

"What's with the frown, you've been bouncin around like your fucking walkin on sunshine all afternoon, what's the matter Sook, you turning into a cynic like me?"

Tara asked me and I shook my head, and she asked me turning her attention to me as she gave me a once over…

"What happened to you anyway this mornin, you win the lottery?"

"Would I still be working today if I had?" I asked her smartly and then her gaze dropped to my neck…

"Fucking A, you got some didn't you?"

My eyes opened wide and my face colored a deep shade of crimson as I warned her…

"Language Tara."

She just waved my warning away and replied…

"No one gives a fuck if I cry out every name in the book, see watch this (she hollered over to Arlene and her group of waitress chippies) So was it his dick or his wallet that cinched it for ya this time Arlene? Nothin like a good ass…"

"Tara!" I squeaked stunned by her language, but she was right, they ignored her. Tara only got a strange warning look from Sam and I couldn't help but find it ironic.

"So sister, spill the beans, was it with that hot as hell handyman you got shackin up with ya?"

My face burned with heat and I quickly shook my head…

"No, he's staying in my brothers room Tara, please, that's sick!"

God I didn't need her starting in on me too. If she found out about Eric and me, Id never hear the end of it.

"No, that's hot!" She replied with a smug smile, her eyes zoning out. I could tell she was thinking of Eric in not so appropriate ways and I didn't like it. So I moved to go congratulate Arlene and that's when Tara replied…

"It better not be that Jackass Bill, cause if it is, I swear I'm gonna give both of you a good kick in the ass. Come to think of it I haven't seen that chicken shit anywhere around recently, maybe he took up with them crazy shriner folk or something, he always did strike me as one of those old farts."

I let out a giggle, but Tara had a point. Where had Bill gone? Come to think of it, I hadn't seen him recently either.

"I'm glad you dumped his ass, but if I were you Id tap that Viking stat, gotta make up for lost time!"

I rolled my eyes, and shook my head replying…

"Cant I just be happy by myself?"

"Sure, but there aint no need to be wasteful, I mean c'mon, he's like a fucking Adonis, that ass alone…"

My face turned red and I couldn't face her any more after that, turning to make my way towards Arlene.

"Fine don't tell your best friend how Sookie got her groove back, see if I care!" Tara hollered after me as my face fell white in shock.

Sam turned to look at me strangely, but that's when Arlene ran up to him, meaning us and announced…

"Since Billy Ray has gotta go out of town for the next month trappin snakes in the bayou, we want to have a party, tomorrow night."

Everyone cheered. Sam looked back at me and I knew he was dreading what came next…

"Oh Sam, pretty please, there isn't a game on or anything tomorrow, would you mind terribly if we had it here, it would mean so much to me and Billy, and the kids of course."

I had to conceal my eye roll, even for Arlene that was pretty pathetic, throwing her kids into her negotiation tactics, but I knew Sam was a sucker and an all around nice guy and he finally replied…

"Fine Arlene, Ill get the booze but you have to get the food."

"Oh THANK YOU SAM!" She exclaimed throwing her arms around him happily, she almost knocked him over. Luckily the bar stopped them and he nodded his head…

"Yeah, sure."

I smiled, and went to go clean off my tables and that's when I heard Sam call me from behind…

"Hey Sook, wait up a minute!"

I turned around to look at him in question and asked him with a polite smile…

"Yes, Sam, what is it, do you want me to work tomorrow?"

Sam smiled sheepishly and ran a hand through his scraggly hair. He looked back at me with a twinkle in his eye and I suddenly felt like this could be more than just work…

"Actually…(he hesitated for a moment as if pondering his question and then he continued…) Sook, I was wonderin if you'd be my date tomorrow night, Ill get Dawn and some of the other girls to keep an eye on things, but it might be fun to hang out, I've been so busy with work lately and you've been busy with...well (his voice trailed off and he looked at me earnestly...) We could have fun..."

I raised my brows in surprise and I saw Tara nodding profusely and mouthing the words…

'SAY YES' behind Sam's head. I opened my eyes wider in warning, but Sam was still awaiting my reply sincerely. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't tell him I was screwing Eric, we had agreed to keep it secret, this was supposed to be uncomplicated, but oh god, it was so turning into something very complicated, all I could see was Tara's bobbing head behind me and Sam's sweet puppy dog eyes, and then I saw some of the other girls looking over at us and smiling. I hadn't been smiled at for weeks. It was a strange feeling and I didn't quite feel like myself. I knew I was going to regret this, I knew it! I finally closed my eyes took a deep breath and answered…

"Alright Sam, Ill be your date."

_I was so going to hell for this! _


	11. Chapter 11

**AN**: Okay well this is an 'Intense' chapter, and Im not using that word lightly. So buckle your seat belts, emotional roller coaster ride is about to begin. ;) Thanks again to all my lovely peeps for reviewing, and reading. And I encourage those of you who haven't to go check out the Sookieverse teaser Monday thread. I was bad and didn't put a teaser this week since I was posting this today, but I try to. Its a nice way to get a nice little taste/teaser from your favorite fan fictions. :) Here is the linky...http://forum(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/topic/55534/19191439/1/

Kay shutting up now. Hope you enjoy this one! xoxo

**Chapter 11-Sweet Emotion**

Of course my number one concern was what would Eric think of this? And in the very next minute the phone rang, and guess who it was? Yep, that's right.

_Speak of the devil._

"Sook, Tall dark and hot is on the phone..." She turned to the receiver and added....

"Oh that reminds me, you better be comin to our party tomorrow night, all the beer you can drink, food, hot girls…like those of us who appreciate nice cars..."

I rolled my eyes, having enough of Tara's flirting and I yanked the phone out of her hands, casting her a glare. What the hell happened to her crush on my brother? I wondered but truthfully I had way bigger problems at the moment, like why did I always find myself sandwiched between two men.

"Eric?" I answered in question, and he replied clearly not phased by Tara's advances.

"Hi Sookie."

I smiled remembering that note from this morning, the promise that we would go out on a date tonight, just the two of us, and I instantly forgot about all of my other problems.

"Hi." I smiled again, but then I wondered why he was calling here, he never called here, oh god, something was wrong. That was the last thing I needed right now. I began to grow worried and I asked him...

"Is everything all right?"

"Yeah its fine, I just, this is embarrassing, but my car got a flat, and I don't have a spare, so I had to buy one of those quick tire things, and I have it at the repair shop now but they are closed until Monday."

"Where are you, do you want me to come pick you up?"

He sighed, I could tell this was hard for him and I assured him..."For goodness sake, Eric I don't mind, let me just ask my boss."

"No Sookie, its okay, I'm with my uncle now, but if you could swing over here after work, Id appreciate it."

"Of course." I replied.

He gave me the directions and then I hung up. I was excited to see him again, that was until I realized he said he was at his uncles house. I wasn't sure what to think, but I couldn't help but wonder, what if his uncle didn't like me? I wasn't exactly high-class Oxford material; I didn't even go to college.

"Everything okay?" Tara asked me. I looked over at her and nodded offering a small smile...

"Yes, he just got a flat."

"Ooh the pussymobile got a flat, poor baby, he need a ride?"

I looked at her and replied sharply...

"No, I have it covered."

I turned over to Sam and asked him if I could leave early.

"Of course, Ill see you tomorrow."

He winked at me and I told him feeling a wave of guilt for leading him on...

"Sam were just going as friends okay, Ill be your date, but I want that to be clear."

"Sure thing Sook." He replied with a smile and he went back to his office.

I found out when Bill and I had first started dating that Sam had a crush on me and I didn't want to go under false pretenses. Not like this wasn't making things 5 million times more complicated, but I didn't have time to think about it now. Rushing to my locker I grabbed my change of clothes, stripping out of my uniform because I was going to meet Eric and his uncle, I ran a brush through my hair and put on some lip gloss before going out to my car.

I took the directions Eric had given me. His uncle was staying at a nursing home in Shreveport. I had to pull over to read my scribble and then realized I missed the exit, so I backtracked. I had made good time but was a little later than I had intended when I got there. I felt anxious and nervous when I saw the sign, Shreveport Serenity Home.

I pulled over my little yellow Gremlin knowing Eric would just be tickled pink to ride back in this hunk of junk and got out.

I tucked my hair behind my ears and straightened out my tank and short whirly skirt, took a deep breath, and went inside.

The woman at the front desk was busy doing her nails when I got in and made me wait till she got off the phone, but when she finally did, she looked at me as if I was interrupting her break and asked…

"Can I help you?"

I didn't know what had become of customer service these days. I was only maybe 6 or 7 years give or take older than this girl, but there was something about the young ones not giving a crap about anyone but themselves. Maybe it was a generational thing. Or maybe I was just getting old. I cringed at the thought. And then looked back at her and replied…

"Yes, I'm here to see Fintan Brigant."

"And you are?" She asked me taking out the guest ledger…

"I'm, um er (who was I, I couldn't say I was Eric's girlfriend, cause I wasn't, and promptly blushed in embarrassment…) I'm a…a friend of the family, a friend of Eric's."

Her face relaxed a little and I thought I saw a hint of a smile when I mentioned Eric's name. I didn't like that smile.

"You can go down that hallway, and take a right, his room is on the left side."

I nodded my head noting she was giving me the once over, and it made me even more nervous.

I followed the direction she had pointed, noting there were two rights. I thought about going back to ask, but I didn't want to deal with her anymore, I just wanted to see Eric, so I went down to the end first, and then I saw his name, Brigant, Room 147 on the door.

I don't know why I felt like a bundle of nerves, but I did. Taking a deep breath I raised my hand to knock on the door.

A few moments later it opened from the other side and there stood Eric. For some reason I suddenly wanted to jump into his arms and kiss him up and down in greeting, but I refrained when I heard another voice behind him…

"Who's there?"

He smiled at me, somehow his eyes making me feel more comfortable, relaxing me, his gaze flicked with mine and he took my hand and led me in the room…

"Fintan, this is Sookie, she's a….a friend of mine, Adele's grand daughter."

The man turned to face me and I couldn't help but think he seemed familiar to me. Very familiar, yet I couldn't place it. Being the polite southern girl I was I put out my hand to greet him and replied with a smile…

"Pleasure to meet you Mr. I mean Dr. Brigant."

"Oh hog wash is formalities child, hog wash, just call me Fintan."

He smiled and took my hand warmly. I looked back at Eric, yet he hadn't said anything and I answered politely…

"All right, Fintan then."

"Fintan, Sookie is here to…"

"She's mine you know." He replied interrupting Eric with a smirk and I looked over at Fintan in question…

"I'm you're what?"

He just laughed with that twinkle in his eye and he smiled at me, and replied…

"Well my kin of course, we are related after all."

I looked at Eric awkwardly. Eric shook his head as if suggest I not delve further into it, I did remember him telling me Fintan had dementia, and possibly early stages of Alzheimer's so I figured he just had me mixed up with someone else…

"I think you have me confused with someone else Doctor, I mean, Fintan."

I smiled sympathetically because Fintan looked sad for a moment, but then he looked up at me and Eric continued…

"Sookie came to give me a ride home, can I get you anything before we go, more towels, more saltines?"

"He loves his saltines." Eric replied lowly to me with a smirk and I couldn't help but smile. Noting the loud way Eric was speaking earlier, I gathered that Fintan was losing his hearing as well as his mind. But it was sweet the way Eric was taking care of him. I could tell there was a bond there.

"No, but maybe Sookie can give me a kiss on the cheek before she goes, you are a chip off the old block indeed child, (he looked at Eric and added) I would wager she's also your girlfriend, or she wouldn't be here to give you a ride."

I looked back at Eric worriedly, firstly because god knows who he thought I was, and secondly and more importantly, his uncle was calling me Eric's girlfriend, what if it got out? What if he told my Gran? But Eric just shook his head and muttered…

"Forget it, he gets mixed up, and will probably forget this whole day ever happened 5 minutes after we leave."

Fintan winked at me and I couldn't help but smile. What a cute little old flirt.

"That's up to Sookie." Eric replied his eyes met mine and I smiled back at him. For some reason at ease by the fact that we didn't have to be so secretive here.

"Well how about we stay just for a few minutes? I want to hear all about your time at Oxford it sounds fascinating."

Fintan's eyes lit up brightly when I mentioned Oxford. I could tell that was a happy place for him and he replied…

"Well, I'm sure Eric has told you I teach history."

I smiled noting the tense but didn't say anything following Eric's lead I nodded and let him go on…

"Yes early European history right?"

"That's right!" He replied with a smile. "Clever girl." I smiled, and then Eric's phone rang.

I looked back at him as he took his phone out and looked at the caller id.

"Excuse me I have to take this, Ill be right back."

He smiled back at me and I turned to face Fintan as Eric went out into the hallway.

"So what is your favorite event?" I asked him and Fintan smiled and replied…

"Oh by far the Italian Renaissance and Roman Inquisition, my dear have you ever heard the story of Savonarola and his Bonfire of the Vanities? He was Pope Alexander IV who ruled Florence in the late 1400's. He vehemently preached against the moral corruption of much of the clergy at the time, and his main opponent was Rodrigo Borgia. Savanorola ordered the whole of Florence to dispose of all of their valueables and worldly posessions into this bonfire. He was an ugly ghastly little man, but he single handedly inspired a new way of thinking. You see my dear, sometimes we must undergo great tragedies and understand the darkness, in order to find the light."

He smiled and I could tell he was enjoying his lesson, as was I. It was clear even though his memory was going, his mind was still sharp, and I could see how Eric's mother must have loved him and looked up to him as her professor and mentor.

A minute later Fintan went over to find a book and handed it to me.

I looked down at the striking imagery on the cover and read the title…"Dante's Inferno"

He smiled and replied…

"This was Sofia's favorite book, Eric's mother (he explained) she even sent me a picture of her reading it to Eric see?"

He pulled out an old photo, black and white, it looked like it was taken from the early 80's, and there in the midst of the most beautiful garden I had ever seen sat a 7 or 8 year old Eric with his light shaggy blonde hair next to his mother in her pretty ruffled floral dress as she read from the book. He was so sweet, and those eyes, they were just as intense as they were now. And his mother was strikingly beautiful. She didn't have blonde hair like him, but chestnut brown and I could tell they shared that same smirk as she smiled while he touched the pages. It made my heart melt a little to see them so happy, mother and child. I dared to look back up at Eric who had just stepped back in, scared this memory might be a painful one for him, I quickly tucked the picture back away, but Eric seemed unscathed.

"It's yours dear, I have the entire book recited by memory, I think its time to give it to a pair of new eyes."

I looked back at Fintan unable to believe he would give me such a precious item. This looked really old, like really really old and I just couldn't take something like that from him, I barely knew him…

"I couldn't possibly accept this, its too valuable, but thank you." I handed him back the book but he refused it…

"Nonsense child, I'm an old man and I don't have time for such silly arguments (he turned his gaze to Eric and asked him…) So will your mother be joining us for dinner boy, I would so love to hear her recitation of the Divine Comedy (he turned back to me and remarked) She really is a smart girl, just like you."

I smiled wearily feeling sad that such a finite mind was plagued with such a crippling disease and I looked back at Eric hopefully, but Eric's voice was filled with melancholy as he was forced to explain…

"Fintan, she's dead, Sofia is dead."

He looked down at his hands sadly and nodded his head…

"Oh yes that's right, I keep forgetting."

Just then an aid knocked on the door and asked him…

"Mr. Brigant, are you ready for dinner?"

Fintan smiled faintly and replied…

"I suppose so."

My heart went out to him. To relive the deaths of those he loved every day had to be horrifying. I couldn't imagine it.

I took Eric's hand and he looked at me and I suggested….

"Eric, why don't we join him for dinner, I think he might appreciate the company." I hated to think that this was the only family Eric had left, having the sudden urge to let him cherish it.

I looked into his eyes, and immediately saw question there and then I remembered our earlier scheduled picnic date and I replied…

"How about we take a rain check on our picnic?" I offered him a smile and pouted my lips for good measure, wanting him to know I still very much wanted to go on that date, and I ran my hand along his back encouragingly…

He finally sighed and replied…

"All right, but you have to help me finish off the torte cake, that stuff doesn't last."

I smirked at his negotiation tactics, unable to help myself I leaned in and kissed the side of his cheek, and I replied in a whisper…

"I promise Ill make it up to you tonight."

He raised his brow and I felt my legs go wobbly. Luckily the aid already had Eric's uncle in his wheelchair and he pushed him down to the dining hall. I held Eric's hand behind them the whole way, enjoying our freedom for a little PDA, blissfully unaware at how happy I was in that moment.

* * *

By the time we got home it was already dark. I was right about Eric not enjoying his ride in the Gremlin; his legs were practically jammed against the dashboard. I would have felt bad for him if his hand hadn't kept wandering to my knee. Even in tight confined spaces he made the most of it, I realized with a smirk.

When I had pulled up in my driveway, he had me all hot and heavy panting for him. We barely made it out of the car before we attacked each other with our hungry mouths. I had missed him so much. I hadn't realized it until now. He pulled me up into his arms and I handed him my house keys as he ascended the stairs.

My hands were everywhere, fumbling with his belt, with his shirt. It was safe to say I was possessed with passion and energy and vitality. And his mouth was my fountain of life.

I heard the door unclick and he carried me in, my legs already straddling his waist, his tongue dove into my mouth and I gripped the back of his shirt.

He stumbled a bit, fumbling to find a light and then gave up after a few minutes, our lucid eyes adjusting to the dark as he carried me in the living room.

"Mmm Eric!" I gasped and kissed him passionately and I felt my seat touch the edge of the sofa. I wanted him bad.

My fingers curled through his hair as he pressed his hard bulge into my pelvis spreading my thighs out further. I was already wet, oh so wet with anticipation, and he pulled my tank up and out of my skirt. I wanted him to take off my bra, effortlessly, like he had done the night before, but instead his hand went south and I felt myself stiffen when I realized his fingers had dipped into my panties.

My heat coated his fingers but all I could think as he continued to kiss me was I couldn't breathe, I couldn't let him touch me like that, not there, not like they had touched me…

"Eric!" I mumbled under his mouth, his tongue licking mine, and then his fingers slid inside coating my wetness and, I shook my head trying to shove him away but his body was so huge…

"What is it?" He asked me his eyes lucid and he went back into kiss me. But I flashed back to that night, the night of my attack, and all those years ago, and then I lost it. He leaned in to kiss me again, his fingers twirling around in my sensitive spots and that's when I summoned all the strength I possessed to shove him off me, exclaiming breathlessly.

"Eric, I can't, stop!"

I stood up and pulled my skirt down and he looked back at me like I had lost my mind.

"Sookie, what's wrong?"

But I couldn't be here; I couldn't stand here and face him when I felt like this. I was humiliated and small and tiny and I didn't want anyone to see me let alone Eric right now making my way to the stairs, I proclaimed not able to face him…

"Nothing, I'm just going to bed early…"

"Sookie?"

But I couldn't look at him…

"Sookie did I hurt you, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to."

If I had tears to cry I would have, but instead my eyes stung shut and I shook my head, my chest heaving and voice frogging up…

"No, just, I need to be alone!"

I exclaimed rounding the corner at the top of the stairs I ran into my room and closed the door shut quickly behind, locking it tight. I sunk down on the other side and stared out the window numbly.

I felt like I was going mad. My body didn't know which way was up or down, and my mind didn't know which direction was left or right. I wanted to cry so badly but as hard as I tried, I couldn't muster any tears. The worst part in all of this was that the one person I wanted to be with right now I had pushed away. I put my head in my hands wondering, why it had to hurt so much? The moon was full and bright tonight and I wondered again if I was to be cursed to be single. The solitary moon that shined so bright up in the sky looked so lonely tonight. Barely even one star to keep it company. Yes that was me, destined to be alone forever.

I shook my head and looked out in spite. I hated this feeling, what I had become. Some broken ex virgin spinster. I should be locked up in an asylum.

I needed to get my mind off it all, off everything, just try to wipe the slate clean again so I went into my shower. I scrubbed hard in anger trying to cleanse my misery away, I thought somehow if I had enough soap and used the bristle brush I could get it out, but it only made me feel more empty.

So I turned off the water, put on my nightgown and fell into bed. I couldn't sleep and after awhile my eyes locked in to the patterns and shadows on my ceiling, as they blended together into darkness. All I could think of was him.

I closed my eyes trying to will it away, the pain, the hurt, my past, my feelings, but they wouldn't leave. My aching heart cried to me, and I tried so hard. I even took the book off my nightstand and started to read, but the words all blended together in more abstract shapes and patterns. I threw it against the wall angrily, unable to contain myself anymore. I was suffocating again. I knew there was only one thing that could help.

I got up, my dried hair wavy and wild and I went to my door unlocked it, tugged it open and flew down the stairs. It was dark; I had no sense of time or place, only purpose.

Like a moth to her flame I found myself standing in front of the door to his room. I knocked quietly and waited for an answer, but there was no reply. I opened the door slightly to see if he was inside. It was dark, but I could make out his large form and there wasn't any more hesitation. I…I didn't know why I needed him so much, but I did…

I moved inside closing the door behind me and pulled up my burning nightgown off over my head stepping over to his bed, I watched him for a moment as he turned around groggily to face me.

"Sookie?"

Eric muttered hazily, but I didn't answer. I only removed my panties, my body already 2 steps ahead of us, I stood there naked and then I slid my body next to him throwing my arms around his warm middle pressed my lips against his cheek and whispered…

"I'm sorry."

For some reason I needed him to know that the earlier incident wasn't about him and I leaned in to kiss his strong jaw.

"I'm so sorry Eric."

He looked at me and I saw the emotions pass over his eyes. At first confusion and then torment, till finally he gazed into me.

I kissed his lips and he kissed me back pulling me towards him. My body coursed with joy when I felt him responding to me with desire and asked him running my hand along the back of his neck.

"Can we start over?"

His eyes searched mine and I knew in that moment I didn't want to dominate him anymore, I wanted things to feel natural between us, I wanted us to be equals, my brows creased in plea.

But I wasn't prepared for him to put a stop to my advances as my lips nuzzled into his neck sprinkling kisses over his tanned skin he pulled back and nudged away.

"Why are you here Sookie?" He asked me gently. I could tell that he was confused and agitated because I had acted quite crazy before, I couldn't say I blamed him. I had only been thinking about myself this whole time, but what about him? He wasn't some punching bag. I gave him an honest answer and I confessed…

"I need you."

He closed his eyes and nodded, looking down for a moment and then he lifted his gaze to meet mine and he asked softly…

"You need another escape?"

I looked at him tormented, because I could see the light flicker in his eyes and it hurt me because I knew what he was thinking. He thought I was using him. Disappointed that he would think that's all I wanted, and I shook my head and met his gaze point blank…

"I need you..." I reaffirmed, putting my hand over his heart, and met his gaze sincerely, my heart yearning to connect with him. I knew the connection existed, I had felt it before, that pull and all consuming power over me. I longed for it again. And he confessed softly his voice filled with emotion...

"I'm afraid to touch you Sookie…I don't want to hurt you."

I couldn't pretend his words didn't sting. Because they did, badly.

In that moment I felt my eyes tear up, because I realized I had done this, I had caused him to be afraid to touch me based on my reaction to him. I knew he didn't mean to hurt me, I knew it was just some stupid knee jerk reaction. My fear creeping back in, those underlying fears that I might die alone, maybe he had grown tired of me and wanted a girl who wasn't as screwed up, but I tried to push those thoughts back down knowing I needed to be strong now. He deserved more. I had to be brave.

"Its okay, you can touch me anywhere you want, I want you to, and I trust you."

I looked into his eyes and bit my lip, teetering on the edge of a breakdown; if he refused me I don't know what I would do.

"Sookie." He shook his head, and I felt my heart stop. No if I wanted this, I had to get past my closet of skeletons. I had to try.

"No, I want this." I assured him in a whisper.

He paused for a moment watching me and then I took his hand and brought it down to my navel, proving to him and myself that I wouldn't freak out this time. I knew I was playing with fire, but I wanted to try this, try it without thinking about that time, I wanted a man to be able to touch me intimately and not feel dirty or have to think about those unspoken moments for the rest of my life, I wanted to find peace.

I put my hand over his and lay back closing my eyes and I guided him south, I felt his fingers brush my velvety coils and I tensed up instinctively but then I felt Eric's lips touch my neck, then jaw, then mouth. Oh yes, that's what I needed, what I craved and he lowered his hand further into my dampness, but his tongue was doing unyielding things to my mouth and my free arm wrapped around his back. As my other hand fell down to the side, the pleasure helping me forget about the pain. He was inside me, but his fingers were gentle as he applied just the right pressure to make me wet. He rubbed some along the base of my entrance and then he brought his fingers up to my lips and painted the remaining amount along my pink flesh as he buried his lips over mine.

I shuddered because it felt so amazing, I knew he could make it better, a little voice inside my head whispered encouragingly, and I pulled him down closer to me. Wanting to take this slow, to savor this, his touch, his feel, his taste, all of it, I wanted to be wrapped from head to toe in Eric and my tongue finally met his. I could taste myself on him. He kissed me lightly and then I kissed him back harder and he pushed his tongue into my mouth.

My eyes fluttered as his lips left mine and ventured down south. He trailed kisses along my neck and collarbone and I was reminded of that night, that night that started all this my body humming with warmth and cherishing his mouth as he nursed my body back to life.

I felt more explosions then, his intense stare was on mine watching me. I could see the glaze reflecting off his chin in the moon light, feeling fully ravished but wanting more, needing to feel him fill me up too, I opened myself to him, my eyes lucid, arms and legs hungry for his embrace.

He pushed himself up hovering over me and I gripped his neck with my hands, my body craving him and I felt the air coat my moist thighs as he raised himself up on his knees to kick off his boxer shorts.

My body coursed with excitement and adrenaline, waiting for him to make his move, I felt him put his fingers inside me once more, to make way for his hardness and then he slid inside, it was always slow, allowing me to experience every square inch of his manhood until he pushed back as far as he could go.

I never felt closer to another human being in my life, I thought, as his chest pressed up against mine and our velvety curls touched and brushed against one another.

I raised my legs and crossed them behind his perfect backside as he slowly moved in and out. I felt my body begin to hum with pleasure as he hit that magic spot again and again and again, taking me with him to far away places.

He brushed my hair away with his hand and I watched his eyes as he made love to me. It was entrancing and only heightened our physical experience as my pain faded into the background.

I clung to him feeling the pressure build inside, getting a strange sensation that I was holding in much more than just an orgasm, everything that had culminated up until this point, my damaged childhood, the loss of my parents, my grandfathers death, my brother leaving, all those years in silence, Bill, it had all melted into a ball inside me, and it was suffocating me.

His hips rose and fell over mine and as I tried to bite back my tears and hold the emotion in, fighting desperately to concentrate on the pleasure, like a burning ball of passion kicking around inside me uncontrollably, he took my body to new heights. I was naked and vulnerable, scared, yet happy all at the same time, until finally, the dam burst open and I felt him pour into me as my walls caved in around him.

His hips bucked into mine as I cried out, my limbs quivering around his, I took one final deep breath and then I couldn't hold it back anymore.

The sob came out sounded like another muffled cry partially to signal my final moments of release, partially from my emotional build up, and then the tears finally followed.

It was dark in the room, and Eric leaned in to kiss me, but by that time the tearstains had painted my cheeks and I was sure he could taste the salt.

He pulled back and looked into my eyes, his face changing from one of pleasure to one of concern, and he asked me in alarm, his voice gentle...

"Sookie, what is it?"

I had to take a few deep breaths, shaking my head because I didn't want him to think this was about him, no what we experienced was amazing, and I pulled him closer to me, so my body was buried safely under his.

"Just breathe…" He encouraged me and I nodded unable to exhale yet, trying to pull my emotions back in…

He kissed the side of my cheek tenderly, and then it avalanched.

I sobbed into his chest as he pulled me back with him, just needing to get it out, get everything that was toxic inside me out so I could be me again.

But he waited, patiently. As long as it took, he waited for my sobs to die down and my breathing to return to normal. I wondered again how he could be so patient with me, any other man would have been running for the hills by now, I was sure of it. I knew I owed him an explanation, no matter how hard it was for me to dig back up. After a few long moments of silence, I confessed quietly…

"It happened to me when I was a little girl."

He creased his brows in confusion, and the tale that had been buried deep in a box with a lock and key inside another chest, kept hidden carefully behind the veil I wore for 18 years. It gave me gooseflesh to think of it again, biting my lip, my eyes met his in plea, praying he would understand and not cast me aside like the freak I thought I was...

"I was 9 the first time it happened…"

I watched his eyes to register his reaction, but his face was unchanging, and I felt I could muster the courage to go on....

"It continued for about 6 months after that, he, my uncle, Bartlett, would come to visit once a month, (I flinched when I spoke his name because the very name invoked a fear deep inside of me, but I continued…) I dreaded it when he came, he always seemed to find me, I...(my voice became shaky, the emotion coming through once more as I tried to go on, feeling the pain and horror of that little girl all over again, but I had come this far, no point stopping now...) I tried to stay by my Gran's side, I tried to stay with Jason, but he had his friends (my tears now falling in a constant stream) And Gran had her obligations too, Bartlett offered to fix things around the home, but then he'd ask her to go to the store to pick up what he needed, I realize that now, he wanted to get her out of the house."

My eyes were stony as I recalled that horrible time from my life.

I was thankful that Eric pulled me to his chest. I didn't even realize it but I fell into his embrace naturally, my tear stained cheeks pressed against his chest, confessing the part that hurt the most...

"I've prayed for so long, just to be normal, I just wanted to be normal and not have this ugliness inside me, this ugly little secret that makes me feel dirty and sick and alien...I prayed somehow some day I could take it all back, just blink it away like it never happened."

"Sookie." He whispered against my ear, but the pain was just too intense, and I finally admitted, my voice laced with sadness and despair, my voice as quiet as a mouse...

"He broke me Eric, and I'm afraid Ill never be truly happy again."

I looked up into his eyes and saw pain there, the pain was so intense it bounced off me into him and I looked back at him in yearning as he asked gently bringing his palm to my cheek...

"How can you blame yourself for that? How can you think that when you were only 9 years old? You were just a little girl!"

I heard his voice cloud up as well as he pulled me back to his chest, his arms holding me tight, and I felt him kiss my temple. Clearing his throat, Eric concluded...

"You're not broken Sookie, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever met, inside and out."

I smiled weakly thinking Eric was being kind, but I knew he just wanted to make me feel better, but nothing could heal me, the damage was done, so I closed my eyes and placed my head back on his chest. I could hear his heart beating below my ear and it pained me to think I might never know true happiness.

"I'm sure you say that to all the girls…" I replied trying to push the subject aside with humor, I didn't want to talk about me anymore.

"I mean it." Eric declared caressing my cheek with his hand so I was forced to look at him.

"Eric…You don't have to…" I insisted blinking tiredly, my pained eyes meeting his afraid I might find pity or sympathy staring back at me but his gaze was steadfast and supportive.

"You have a lot here Sookie, despite what you may think, I see a lot of people who care about you, who love you, you're grandmother, your brother, your friends…

I looked at him wondering if he was going to include himself in that group, but I quickly lost my nerve and looked back down at the patch of sparse blonde hair on his chest…

"Yes, I know they care…" I whispered, he was right; they were here for me through it all, I did have a lot to be thankful for. There was a long pause and I felt his voice rumble below my ear before his words registered in my mind

"And, you have me now…"

"I do?" I looked up at him, wondering if he really meant it, and he nodded to my relief.

It was hard to believe my ears. I had gone so long on this road alone, 18 years. It was just, just overwhelming. Something powerful stirred something deep inside my core when I looked at him and I didn't know whether to embrace it or run and hide.

"You do." He replied with a soft smile that turned my insides to mush when my gaze flicked with his. It hadn't really occurred to me up until now, but I never really felt this way with Bill.

My mind wandered as I flipped through all that had conspired today, like the pages of that book Fintan gave me. The old man had let me into his heart so easily without even knowing who I was.

I looked up into Eric's gaze wondering if he had found his way into my heart as well.

It didn't take me long to come to a conclusion as he smiled at me and leaned in to kiss me tenderly on the mouth. The butterflies flew confirming it.

He had found his way, and just as easily.

I looked into Eric's eyes again with a cautious swallow, realizing I was falling for this man, this wasn't just some tryst, it was very real and very dangerous. I just prayed that I wouldn't fall flat on my face this time.


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: **Okay so first off, I have to print a huge retraction. I had edited the last chapter in the first day it was posted, but many of you probably read that Sookie called Fintan, Eric's grandfather when she met him. Im getting dyslexic in my old age, lol. So no, Fintan is not Eric's grandfather, he is no blood relation to Eric and Eric calls him his uncle as a nickname because Fintan was close to he and his mother growing up. But his mother was not romantically involved with Fintan, she only named him as Eric's godfather because as I said, they were tight. Anyway, hope that clears things up. Sorry about the mistake, its fixed now. Annnd now this chapter, hehe. **Ducks flying tomatoes and angry mobs with torches.** The chapter title speaks for itself. That said, I had fun writing it and I hope you have fun reading. Thanks always for the reviews and hope you enjoy! :)

**Chapter 12-One Step Forward, Two Steps Back**

In the morning I woke in Eric's arms. Yes, still stark naked, although strangely I didn't feel naked, I felt warm and wrapped in an Eric shaped blanket. My arms and legs still numb I didn't even try to move, knowing I would be rewarded with jolting shocks up and down my legs and arms if I did. I looked at him curiously in thought for a moment.

Id by lying if I said this isn't what I wanted, despite knowing this could be more than just a fling. It was like when I was with Eric, he centered me, which made it much harder to freak out, although there was still that little scared voice screaming inside me to watch it, I had just messed up royally with Bill, didn't care to make that mistake again.

I tried not to think about that complicated feeling stuff as I studied the strong cleft in his chin, or the little rift his lips formed as they opened ever so slightly allowing the air from his lungs in and out through even breathing. His nose was one of a kind too, it reminded me of one of those famous actors, and his eyes…

Even though they were closed they were still incredibly powerful. His thick ash brown lashes fanned out over his strong cheekbones and I suddenly felt the urge to kiss each lid, like one would do in prayer, but I retained my silence and just watched him.

I saw him twitch knowing he was stirring and I smiled in happy anticipation, and then his orbs opened displaying the richest sapphire blue I had ever seen.

"Morning." He replied groggily when his eyes met mine the side of his lip turned up and I replied biting my lip modestly…

"Morning."

His fingers caressed my back softly sending tingles down my spine and I asked him purring...

"Can we just stay here all day?"

The other side of his mouth turned up and he leaned in to kiss my neck...

"I don't have any other plans today...."

I smiled warmly thinking, neither did I, as far as I could recall, aside from my Gran coming home tonight, I had no other worries, my mind was mush as his lips worked a trail down my neck. His hands came around my sides to caress and hold my full breasts in his palms and I shuddered, feeling that familiar yearning pull in my chest.

I pulled his strong stubble covered jaw up to look at me with my small hands on either side of his face just as his mouth was about to devour me whole, I surprised him by kissing him back heatedly. Sending all those charged electrodes to my nerve endings, I ended up feeling those jolting shocks after all, but I didn't care, he made my body fly.

His tongue pushed into my mouth and our breathing entwined as did our arms and limbs and then we rolled around, until finally I felt his hardness press stiffly into my navel as his right thigh pinned down my left thigh. I was on my side looking at him with my lust filled eyes and he pulled my right leg up to ride high on his waist, his hand skirting over my ass cheek as I felt the wetness coat my thighs.

All I could think in that precise moment was--I could get used to waking up like this.

I looked down between us noting he had somehow managed to mangle us out of the bed sheets. His arousal was already nestled snugly between my thighs finding its counterpart like two magnets. I was already too far gone to think of anything else but my intense desire and I reached down to help guide him inside me.

I gasped when I felt that first contact, of his sex parting my folds and brushing abrasively against my clit.

This position was one I had never been in, but it offered me the advantage of seeing everything, I looked into Eric's entrancing eyes first, my heart beating rapidly as he continued the journey, pressing in further and deeper into my core.

Then, I dared to look down in-between us innocently at first, but as my gaze became fixated on his movements, I realized watching it happen was possibly the single most erotic moment of my life. It was mesmerizing, I couldn't look away, all I could think was, I was a woman, he was a man and we were conducting in a sacred yet beautiful act that had been practiced for centuries since the dawn of time, like Adam and Eve.

I felt my orgasm build almost instantly even with his slow steady pace and then I looked up again into his eyes, which only encouraged my cravings for him. He leaned in and kissed me, and I felt that whoosh again as my pleasure found the next cosmic level.

I wanted to push off him, push as he pulled, but he kept me pinned in his lucrative embrace as he continued at his painstakingly slow yet torturous and pleasuring pace.

My fingers wove through his long tendrils of blonde hair and I could do nothing but enjoy the feel of him moving inside me.

Then he attacked my breasts with his hungry mouth and I nearly lost it. I never knew one could experience so much pleasure in that area but with Eric, anything was possible. I threw my head back in maddening ecstasy as he sucked me raw and then finally he loosened his grip and turned over on his back to move deeper inside flipping me up on top of him. His movement rocked something deep inside me and I cried out in pleasure, feeling the first waves ripple through me. His mouth tugged at my nipple and I began to rock my hips over him, the pleasure now spread throughout my body.

I pushed up on my knees his hard aching member rocking my world, and I wanted to pull him up with me and ride the wave my movements quicker and harder over him, but he pulled me back down so our chests were pressed flat together, his large hands gripping my ass, as his lips locked with mine.

I moaned feeling the wetness leak out over him as his hips thrust up into me. My body was going crazy, I wanted release, knowing he was drawing it out, but I wasn't going to go down without a fight, needing to feel that release like oxygen, and began to clench him hard as he thrust in and out.

Eric gasped and I smiled kissing him.

I saw his gaze flick with mine his eyes speaking to me, although I couldn't yet understand what he wanted to say, but before I could even stop to think any more he flipped me over onto my back and pinned my wrists up above my head...

_Oh good God!_

I felt another spasm, not sure how much more my body could take before spontaneously combusting with pleasure, and then to my great relief he began to move faster, applying the pressure, it was building, my body was shaking, I could feel it coming fast and heavy now it was rushing towards my entrance like a volcano filled with molten hot lava.

Eric was a sex god, and I felt my body jerk awake in eternal bliss as we jumped off the cliff together. Then I screamed out his name....

"Eric!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I felt him spill into my walls filling me to the brim and I gasped, my chest heaving and heart beating rapidly as I looked into his deep blue gaze and wanted nothing more than to do that again, as soon as I could move that was. I smiled and pulled him down to me, smothering my mouth with his as our tongues meshed together and lips locked.

My body was still shaking from the biggest orgasm of my life. Unsure if I could speak yet I gasped for air and then we kissed again. I couldn't stop kissing him, nor he me…

"I…I…that…" I wasn't sure what I wanted to say, just that I wanted to say it, he pulled back and looked at me in question, when both of us were interrupted by a knocking at the door.

Eric looked up as did I, my body alarmed for a moment because I wondered if my Gran had come home early, but she wouldn't be knocking, she knew where we kept the spare. It stopped for a second to my relief and I replied breathlessly...

"Whoever it is, they will go away."

He smiled and went back to kissing me, to my delight, my body still lucid and weightless and then we heard it again and I looked up. I groaned having a feeling whoever it was certainly wouldn't go away despite my wishing them to do so. Closing my eyes I sighed to myself and replied sharply, my anger lacing through my voice...

"Ill go get rid of them."

Eric smirked devilishly and kissed me once more for good measure and then I pried myself up out of bed. My body was sticky and the room smelled like sex. I bent over to pick up my undies and nightgown off the floor and blushed when I looked back noting Eric was watching me, his body splayed out provocatively on the bed. Good lord it had to be a sin to be as beautiful as he was, I thought to myself offering him a playful smirk.

"You do realize it's almost noon don't you?" Eric couldn't help pointing out as he undressed me again with his eyes while I slipped on my underwear and tried to find the arms in my nightgown.

I looked over at the clock in panic thinking, oh crap, he was right. If I went to the door in my sleep clothes they would definitely know something was up.

"Do you have a tee I could borrow, and maybe some shorts?"

My eyes skirted around the room and noticed Eric trying to contain a chuckle...

"Hey, if you'd rather get the door, be my guest!" But then he stood up and began to approach me like a stalking tiger I thought maybe I better retract that statement or he might take me seriously.

"Yes, maybe if I get the door dressed as I am they will go away."

Not bloody likely, I thought. Taking one more sneaking glance at that Adonis like body, but the cheeky bastard caught me peeking. I looked at him and covered up my breasts in false modesty then muttered, a quick…

"Forget it."

Eric walked over to the old dresser, in the top drawer he had an old white under tee and a pair of plaid boxer shorts.

"Here, just try to avoid rainstorms and showers in that." He smirked and I rolled my eyes. I knew he was trying to be funny, but now was not the time.

"Thanks." I snatched them from his grip and tried to find the opening to the shirt while holding my nightgown to my chest.

Eric had slid on a pair of black shorts and he insisted taking the shirt from my hands before I could protest...

"Here, allow me."

"Eric!" But before I could protest he lifted it over my head open and I had no other choice but to drop the gown. My cheeks flushed and he replied cheekily...

"There's nothing here I haven't seen before sweetheart."

So much for modesty, I thought giving him another peek at my ample and newly aroused cleavage as he pulled the shirt over my head.

I looked back at him, knowing I could have easily been swept up in his world again and yanked on the boxers over my underwear tucking in the tee. Going sans bra would just have to do.

I looked back at him briefly as he smiled smugly and watched me leave while I hurried out to get the door. I saw my cardigan on the coat rack, knowing it was probably already in the 90's by now but I had to cover up the evidence of my earlier arousal and I opened the door. I looked out wondering if whoever had been there really did leave because I only saw my car but then I spotted a sliver of silver behind my yellow gremlin and my face fell in realization.

"You both definitely like to take your time don't you?"

I heard Pam speak to me from the side. She had taken a seat in the wicker chair on the front porch and had her legs crossed arms folded, smug smile plastered on her face.

I stepped out to address her and exclaimed...

"Pam, what are you doing here?"

She smirked and stood up and then glanced behind me, of course Eric was coming out with that cat that ate the canary look and she looked back from him to me adding coyly...

"I see I just got you both out of bed, I'm sorry how rude of me."

I looked back at Eric again noting his bed hair and realized I hadn't yet looked in a mirror this morning either. Oh god. I quickly tucked my hair behind my ears and met her gaze in question trying to avoid further embarrassment...

"Hi Pam."

She smiled coyly and nodded her head admitting...

"Well it's about time you two got your act together..."

"Pam we were..."

"Oh save it sweetie, next time don't take so long to get to the door and don't leave your windows open, other wayward wanderers might over hear when you're shouting names."

She winked at me and my face turned bright red. I had never been so humiliated in all my life. She heard us? I looked back at Eric mortified, angry because he didn't seem to be embarrassed in the slightest. That smirk painted across his face. Figures, he was a man. I bit my tongue in an effort to silence myself and Eric asked stretching his arm above me in a masculine yet possessive manner as he leaned against the door jam...

"So why are you here?"

Pam chuckled and she replied...

"Well judging from the warm reception I guess you two weren't done yet."

I wasn't going to sit here and listen to beratement from Super Model Barbie and the Viking version of Ken.

"Pam."

Eric warned her and I rolled my eyes because I knew full well he didn't care what she thought, he was just putting on a show for me, and I shook my head…

"Forget it."

I glared back at Pam, having mixed feelings because I appreciated our little shopping spree last week, and her generosity, it was a nice escape, but that didn't change the fact that she was still Eric's ex and a shrink, and cocky as hell. And I replied sharply…

"You know, most friends call ahead of time before showing up out of the blue…"

Her eyes lit up and she looked back at Eric brightly adding in jest with her brow raised in intrigue…

"Ooh, you're really pissed off."

Her smile brightened and I rolled my eyes. Thank god, I heard the phone ring from inside and I spat back not giving her a chance to reply…

"Will you excuse me."

I bumped into Eric's chest, his arm blocking my way, I glared back at him and then I pulled it down pushing my way back into the house. Thank god, a diversion, I thought, knowing whoever it was, I could kiss them. The cat was hungry and meowed at me, I shook my head assuring him that he would get his food soon, but just when I thought he was going left, he went right, which just happened to be in front of my step and I tripped.

Crap. It was already on the fourth ring and I knew if I missed the 5th ring, it would go to the answering machine.

I balanced myself gripping the kitchen counter and headed to the kitchen wall where the phone was located.

"Hello." I answered, and then I heard the answering machine click on followed by a beep signaling the call had gone to the machine.

"Hey Sook, it's me, Sam. Listen, I gotta run over to Pappy's Craw Shack before the party, if you don't mind Ill pick you up on my way back, probably be there sometime between 6 and 6:30. My batteries almost gone so I've got to charge this thing, and the delivery guy is here. Not there, over by the tables! Dammit Terry! (he cursed and concluded) Okay, I gotta go Sook, but Ill see you tonight, I'm looking forward to our date, take care!"

My face colored white, when I remembered that I had agreed let Sam take me as his date tonight. And of course, to make things worse, when I looked up, I saw Eric and Pam standing there watching me.

I felt the pits sink into my stomach, riddled with guilt as I saw his face fall in disappointment. Despite our little spat and what everyone thought I didn't think it was right for me to go with Sam after what Eric and I had shared last night.

"Eric listen I..."

He stiffened up and he replied…

"No I don't think I need to listen, I think I've heard just about enough."

Okay yes, he was definitely angry. I saw the sides of his nostrils flare out and I looked to Pam helplessly.

"Eric, he just asked me spur of the moment."

"When did he ask you?"

Eric growled, and I shook my head not wanting to answer, but he just maintained his angry glare refusing to back down he asked me again sharply…

"When?"

I swallowed and shook my head not wanting him to get the wrong idea….

"I told him I just wanted to go as friends, but he asked me yesterday at work."

Eric's eyes narrowed and he shook his head. To my dismay he actually smiled but I didn't think it was the good kind of smile he met Pam's gaze and replied…

"Unbelievable."

"Eric, we can all go together okay, I just don't want this to come between us." I tried to rationalize wanting to make things right, wanting to go back to the way things were 15 minutes ago.

And then he stepped up to me, his tall 6 foot 5 frame towering over me and he growled…

"I don't do 3rd wheel."

I met his gaze my heart aching and I shook my head. I didn't mean that…

"Eric, we are just going as friends…I want you to…"

But Eric was already turning to leave and he growled…

"I have work to do."

He looked back at Pam and replied…

"You better ask the lady of the house if you can stay here, not the handy man, who apparently rates lower than a just friends date."

"Eric!" I called after him frustrated, but he wasn't going to listen. I heard the door slam to his room, figuring he was going to change into work clothes and I gave Pam a helpless frown.

"Well done, it looks like you successfully found a way to crush both of his balls in your hand at the same time." Pam replied snarkily.

I put my hand on my forehead and leaned against the counter shaking my head in disbelief, wondering how things could have gone so wrong so quickly…

"I didn't mean to hurt him…I…I…"

"You we're afraid of getting too close? So quickly after your last relationship? You don't know anything about him? Why open your heart again to get it crushed a second time? Something along those lines?"

Pam asked filling in the words for me and I met her gaze feeling a sense of dread. She was right, I had been afraid, but I didn't want to admit she was right, nor did I want her to try any of that head shrinking mumbo jumbo.

Even though I knew I wouldn't have an appetite, I turned to make a pot of tea, hoping I could stomach some mild chamomile with honey changing the subject I asked her…

"What did he mean about you wanting to stay here?"

Pam sighed and leaned on against the counter, opposite and facing me and she replied…

"Well my condo had a fire, the idiot next door left town and also his coffee maker plugged in."

"Oh my lord, Pam! I'm so sorry." If I hadn't felt terrible before I felt terrible now and she shook her head not wanting my sympathy…

"It's okay, I didn't lose anything, just everything is covered with that god awful smoke, the insurance company wants to come out and look at it and it will take a few days to finish cleaning everything and appraise for permanent damage."

I met her gaze with creased brows, sick again. Was there nothing I couldn't piss all over? I wondered sadly.

"The fair is in town so all the hotels are booked in Shreveport, but I can look at the hotels in Monroe, its just twice the distance…"

"Say no more, of course you can stay here." I interrupted her and explained…

"We have an extra guest room upstairs, just let me wash the bedding for you and you can move in, I'm sure my Gran will be fine with it."

Pam smiled and to my surprise she walked around to my side of the counter offering a sympathetic smile, then she hugged me and admitted…

"Good, because I think you two will need all the help you can get. Ill go bring in my things." Pam announced cheerfully and went back outside to go grab her luggage.

I watched her go leerily, hearing the back door shut not long after. I looked out the kitchen window and saw Eric take off towards the shed. He was on his phone and I hoped whoever he was talking to could lift his spirits, but judging from the angry arm gestures, I gathered, no so much. I felt terrible, especially after last night and I said a silent prayer that he would forgive me and things would work out tonight. If there was a way to cancel this entire evening I would have, but I was pretty certain Sam would be unreachable until he picked me up tonight. Maybe by then Eric would come around, I thought hopefully.

* * *

Unfortunately Eric made himself virtually invisible for the rest of the afternoon. Just as I finished getting Pam settled in her room, I heard a car pull up in the driveway. I looked out the window and noted it was a taxi.

"Gran!"

I exclaimed knowing it was her. She was early and I threw down the rest of the clean linens I had just washed running down the stairs practically flying into her arms, luggage and all.

"Gran!" I exclaimed again throwing my arms around her so happy to see her. I wanted to cry and kiss and hug her all at the same time, so relieved she was here, I really missed her, I realized and she proclaimed…

"Heavens child, I've only been gone for 2 weeks, Id have thought it was more like 2 months with a reception like that."

I smiled and finally let her go replying with a smile…

"I just missed you."

"Aw, well I missed you too baby girl!" She threw her arms back around me and I felt warm and happy, like everything would be alright now with her here.

She looked around the house noting the airiness and she replied…

"And the house is still standing? I see I left it in good hands."

I smiled back at her and nodded assuring her…

"Of course, you know Id never let anything happen to this house."

She winked at me and smiled replying…

"I know you wouldn't darlin."

I smiled and walked with her into the kitchen, automatically getting her a glass of sweet tea she asked me…

"So, did Eric get a new Ferrari or did you decide to upgrade?"

I smiled and laughed, telling her about Pam and who Pam used to be. My Gran looked at me and she asked me…

"And you are okay with everything?"

I thought that was an odd question coming from my Gran, and honestly I probably shouldn't have been okay with Pam staying here, she was Eric's ex after all, not that my Gran would know anything about Eric and me, but I was really fine with it. Despite Pam's shrink talk, I thought it might be nice to have another girl close to my age around. If anything to help keep Eric in line, or myself, because I was having a hell of a time trying to work things out with him on our own.

"Yes, I am, I think you will really like her Gran." I smiled sweetly and brought in the rest of her luggage.

I made her tell me all about Haiti and then Pam came back downstairs after she had finished unpacking.

I smiled and introduced her to my Gran, as usual she was welcomed with open arms, but also given a short list on the rules of the house, and Pam agreed to abide by each and every one of them wholeheartedly.

"So where is my favorite handy man?" Gran asked and my face fell, when I realized she wanted to see Eric. She was going to know something was up with us with one look at him. I didn't want her to know or get involved especially when we were still trying to figure things out ourselves.

I looked out the window and saw him out back, shirtless of course working on some of the back hedges, and I swallowed.

"Ill go get him." I replied with a smile risking a short glance at Pam who was cool as a cucumber. She gave me a slight nod but nothing else and then my Gran replied…

"Yes, please do, that boy needs to get out of this heat before he collapses of dehydration."

I smiled and marched out the back door. Of course, I had a chance to change this morning, and had folded up his tee and shorts in my room, but hadn't had the opportunity to clean them, so I didn't give them back to Eric yet, hoping we could start over again and put all this behind us.

I finally found him up on top of a ladder…

"Hey."

He looked down from the lemon tree and glanced at me replying nonchalantly…

"Would you like me to shine your shoes? Or perhaps I can fetch you an umbrella to protect you from the sun? Oh wait that's right, you like to fry up like a prune, silly me."

"Eric stop." I objected knowing he would be a hard one to win over.

"Stop what?" He answered still cutting away. I could see the sweat roll down his back and I asked him…

"Will you please come down, I want to talk to you. Please." I asked him as polite as I could, although I have to admit this wasn't very easy for me.

Finally after what seemed like a decade he set down his hedge clippers and climbed down the ladder.

He stood in front of me with his hands on his hips looking equally frustrated and raised his brows in question as if a gesture for me to begin.

I realized we weren't going to get any further till I said some things and he grabbed the tee, doubling as a rag from the back of his pants and wiped his brow.

"Firstly, I just want to say again, I'm sorry."

He rolled his eyes but I continued anyway…

"And secondly, my Grandmother is home and she wants to see you."

He nodded his head and replied…

"Sure, gotta try to patch things up before Gran notices anything off right."

"No." I objected getting angry now, my frustration apparent, I looked into his intense stare and I replied earnestly, hoping for a little slack here…

"No, Eric, I…I just have so many emotions stirring around inside me I don't know which side is left or right anymore, you just have to give me some more time."

He was silent for a moment and then replied wiping his brow one more time and shoving his shirt back into his pants…

"Actually that I think I can do, you can take all the time you want."

My face lifted slightly feeling relieved that he would agree to work with me on this but then he concluded…

"Because, I'm stepping out of the running. I'm done now. Go have fun on your date with your Boss, hell go back to that Jackass that raped you, I don't give a shit."

"Eric!" I snapped unable to believe he just said that, but he shook his head. And he replied…

"I can only be your cabana boy for so long Sookie, I'm tired of playing these stupid childish games."

My heart sunk and I felt the pain resonate in my chest because I didn't see it this way at all, but it hurt me to think that he did, trying to reason with him one last time I plead…

"Eric? I didn't mean to…"

"What part of I'm done don't you understand?" He interrupted me icily.

I met his gaze in anguish unable to believe he could just walk away from what we had without so much as a flinch. I couldn't lie and say it didn't hurt, because it did, like a slap in the face, or a knife cutting into my back. In fact it hurt more than anything else, even the pain from my injury didn't hurt this bad.

I shook my head unable to believe it, as the tears pooled up in my eyes, but his eyes were stone cold and he just looked at me, heartlessly. I felt the tears fight to push through and I couldn't bear to let him see me cry so I turned on my heel and ran off.

Tears falling, I ran as far as my feet could carry me. He could find my Gran himself, the bastard!

xxx

**AN2**: BTW, Eric gets the next chapter, so before you start with the pitchforks and fire remember that. ;)


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: **Boo, no new Lost tonight, lol. But hopefully an E centric chapter makes up for the lack of Sawyer since they both kind of go hand in hand for me. ;) BTW did anyone see that awesome Eric/Pam mini episode? Soo funny. I can just hear Eric saying...."We're looking for something a little less....ridiculous." Haha, oh, I love him! Sorry, okay back on topic, well kind of. One more issue Id like to address. So, a few of you have asked about Bill in the reviews and I cant remember if I said he would be back soon or not. Soon now has been pushed back another 2-3 more chapters, lol. So if there are any Bill lovers (to those 5 of you, sorry just kidding ;)) anyhow, I was struggling on how to get from point a to point b and Im sure if you have read my other fictions you know Im a big plot heavy writer. Only in this story, I feel like the emotional side of things has a bigger role. So I had to take some time out to get alot of these feelings, and concentrate on just Eric and Sookie, in other words just a smal serving of angst before we bring Bill and the rest of the 3 tiered angst cake in. Its all part of the writing process and trust me I think its harder for me than you because I am a huge action buff, so this story is definately a challenge for me as a writer because it forces me to slow down and tackle the emotion stuff. So now after my incessant rambling, I hope you enjoy our beloved Eric's chapter. I promise not to let his voice go missing for so long next time. ;) Thanks always to everyone for reading and especially those of you who review, you are awesomeness. Hope you enjoy! :)

**Chapter 13-All Is Fair in Love and War**

You know that saying all is fair in love and war? What does it even mean exactly? That you deserve what you get? Perhaps that is true, but I contest on the grounds that in neither situation does the poor sucker go in willingly to battle and wakes up the next morning with a bullet hole between his eyes knowing that's what he signed up for. Is that his fault? Is it his fault when he falls for the girl next door because she is always around to drive him bat shit crazy with her madness? No, its not. In no way am I saying we are blameless, or that we should leave everything up to fate, fate is bullshit, or that I'm that poor sucker who fell for the girl next door, please, give me a little credit at least.

But what I am saying is that if they didn't ask for this, why should they be punished?

It should be obvious by now that I have a few things I need to get off my chest too. Not to mention this good day that started off perfectly was quickly falling apart faster than I could say adios.

And, if she thought I was going to run after her, she was sorely mistaken.

To say I was angry was an understatement. I couldn't believe after all we had shared that she would go out and pick the first random guy she could find to date. It made me feel cheap and used and like pond scum.

I wasn't accustomed to that. In fact I was usually the one who went through women like dirty laundry. Not to say I ever treated one date like pond scum, because I didn't. I showed them respect, but I didn't play these stupid games. I always made sure they were clear the relationship wasn't going any farther than casual sex. I was the one calling the shots. I would never have asked one of them to be my secret lover. That was just bullshit. Which is why it surprised me partly that I had let this situation get as far as it did.

Sookie was different, I knew that. If I wasn't so pissed I would have admitted that she claimed a part of me last night. Like her I knew what it was like to feel alone, desolate, broken, and cut down, that didn't make hearing what she went through any easier. I felt like I was reliving her experience with her. It struck a chord in me because I knew about the kind of pain she had experienced. She was so fragile yet so strong and I didn't want to be the one to give her more pain. As I held her in my arms, while her chest rose and fell, and fingers began to curl around mine. I couldn't help but think if she was as troubled as I was, how could I help her? How could I be there for her when I had just as much baggage? I asked myself if someone like me would be good for her, with my history, with everything that had happened, I couldn't help but wonder if she deserved more than that, more than me. And then I wondered even if she did deserve me, if I was good for her and she was good for me, could I handle it? These thoughts mulled through my mind in dreams and my subconscious until I was finally able to surrender to the dark peace.

Which is why it upset me greatly to find that after all my stewing and mulling, she was the one who was intending to screw me over, not the other way around. It made me angry to know I had allowed myself to go through as much torment as I had over the whole sordid affair when she saw me as just another bed buddy. Ironic? Yes I know.

Did I get emotionally invested with those other women? No, never because I was thinking with my head back then, not my heart. I could see now how royally I fucked up this time. Whenever emotions came into play, it ended badly, I should have learned that lesson by now.

As illustrated here. And if I were to be honest, I had to admit that there had been signs leading up to this, which one would have thought could ease my pain and grief, but it just made it worse...

I was willing to give her a little slack with the secret lovers thing. Obviously I wasn't a fan of that little proposition, but given everything she had gone through, I felt it was the least I could do.

But watching her date other men while she came back home and fucked me over like one of those meaningless flings, no, that was the deal breaker. I had no more slack to give and frankly questioned whether or not I could stay here for my last 2 ½ months.

It wasn't like I had much choice in the matter, as the Shreveport PD continued to remind me, which is maybe why I wanted to annihilate the world by the time Sookie came around looking for me this afternoon. That damn case would haunt me till the day I died, I was stupid and naïve to think I'd ever be free of those demons, and could see now that choosing to open Pandora's box with Sookie, was just another log to the fire.

What was I thinking having sex with her? With Adele's granddaughter of all people. I owed her for putting me up here and this is how I handled things?

I sneered angrily and shook my head unable to believe the miserable way this all fell down crumbling like Hiroshima.

Say what you want about war but at least its clean cut for the most part, love however is far more treacherous and painful if you ask me. And it is certainly NOT fair. I wasn't going to have any more of it, my bull shit tolerance reaching maximum capacity.

I decided to suck it up and play nice for Adele. If Sookie was there, Id ignore her as much as I could without it being blatantly obvious. She could keep her delusions, but I wanted nothing to do with her.

I threw on my shirt and wiped off my brow, going inside to see Adele.

"Eric!" Her face lit up when she saw me. It looked like she had been talking to Pam in the kitchen. I felt bad then for ditching Pam earlier, but I knew her well enough to know she could handle herself.

"Hello Adele, it's nice to see you back safely."

She pushed her chair out but I shook my head not wanting her to rise for me…

"No don't get up."

I went over to hug her but she stood up anyway and put her arms around me, and squeezed me tight…

"Oh, it's so good to see you!"

She pulled away and looked at me in question, and I hoped she didn't notice I was more tense than normal.

"So are you surviving, or has all this estrogen driven you crazy yet?"

I looked back at her in question, unsure of what Pam had told, her, hoping to god for once things just wouldn't hit the fan and Pam replied with a smug smirk.

"Oh I think an insane asylum would be peaceful compared to this place wouldn't it Sugar?" She chided me as well.

I smiled faintly despite not being in the best of moods, Adele had a way of cheering one up, she had a more optimistic outlook on things that I found rare in this day in age. And I knew Pam had no tolerance for moping either. Between the two of them, I knew Id never leave the room upset and I shook my head trying to sugar coat things…

"No, I'm keeping my head above water."

She smiled and I replied…

"I see you have met Pam, I hope you don't mind her staying?"

"Don't worry about it, we talked it out, Pam is welcome to stay here as long as she likes, Sookie made up the guest bedroom upstairs."

My gaze flickered when she mentioned Sookie's name the mere mention still bringing up a soreness inside of me. Pam looked at me for a moment and I could tell she could see something was off as hard as I tried to hide my torment but I didn't want to allude to it in front of Adele and I smiled replying…

"That's good."

She smiled and announced…

"Well don't just stand here, go grab something to drink, I'm hot just looking at you."

"Me too." Pam added coyly, twirling a piece of blonde hair around her finger she added mirthfully…

"You are going to need to stay hydrated to keep up with all the pretty girls at that party tonight, maybe one in particular."

She added suggestively with one brow raised and I shot her a warning glare all my nerve endings lighting up. I knew what Pam was doing; she was baiting me and trying to trap me in a corner…

"Oh my a party? How fun!" Adele marveled and she smiled back at me…

"I'm sure you kids will have a wonderful time, especially if there is a special someone to dance the night away with…"

Then she winked at me. I had to do my best not to grit my teeth as I flashed another glare at Pam and then Adele added…

"But I personally cant wait to curl up with a good book and fall asleep in my Queen sized bed, I had no idea how much I would miss my bed after that trip, so what is the occasion?" She asked brightly.

"I'm not sure, isn't someone getting engaged?"

Pam asked me, although I had no clue, her guess was as good as mine and frankly I didn't give a shit.

"Oh I bet its Arlene Fowler, that woman gets engaged more than most women change shoes, she's about due for a new beau too, her last guy turned out to be a serial killer, got carted off to prison last month, woman sure can pick em."

Pam laughed.

I smiled politely back at Adele, poured myself a glass of ice tea after taking a deep breath and pulling myself together, I wanted to nip this in the bud and announced before she could ensnare me further…

"Actually, I don't think I can make it. Don't you remember that we have dinner plans?" I asked Pam, my brow rose in warning and she smiled smugly replying…

"Well I thought we could ride over with Sookie and Sam, we can grab something to eat on the way."

_Over my fucking dead body_, I thought sending her a death glare this time, and I shook my head. I would rather experience water boarding or some other form of painful torture before being stuck in another car with Sookie and her date!

"Sam?' Adele asked surprised, she raised her brows in question but there was also a look of intrigue on her face and she asked me...

"She's not going with Bill?"

I turned around in order to hide the automatic sneer that appeared on my face at that mans mention. If I had known now what I knew then, I wouldn't have been as kind. Thinking it was safe to assume that fucker hurt Sookie too.

"You will have to ask Sookie about that." I finally replied downing my glass of tea and setting it in the sink, wondering when I could get back out to work. I craved the solitude.

"Well that's disappointing." Adele replied.

I turned back around and heard Pam mutter under her breath...

_'Not really.'_

"Either way however, a good party always puts things back the way they belong." Pam replied, meeting my death stare.

"Guess I'm just not really in the mood for a party." I replied answered, trying to change the subject and cover up my anger, but it was pointless.

"That's a shame, I'm sure Sookie will be disappointed you wont be there." Adele replied clearly clueless to my raging undercurrents and I looked back at Pam frustrated.

It wasn't my place to tell Adele, I knew that. I also knew how hard it was for Sookie to tell me what she had last night. Which is why this hurt so much. I wasn't about to divulge to bloody Mother Theresa, who had just gotten back to help in the Haiti relief effort that her grand daughter was most likely raped by that ass hole.

Pam pursed her lips, her long lashes flicked downwards and then she looked back up at me and replied to my great relief, finally taking pity on me…

"It's alright, I'm sure Sookie will have fun either way and Eric does owe me a dinner."

She smirked faintly and I silently was thankful until she added…

"Maybe we can swing by the party after, if Eric is in the mood of course."

My nostrils flared and all I could think of was how to pay her back for her wicked ways. Adele's face was bright and I wasn't about to let down this woman who seemingly wanted me to go out and dance the night away. Sometimes life wasn't all hearts and flowers, I thought cynically, although I couldn't resent her for her cheerful optimism. I didn't care to enlighten her that unlike her granddaughter, I had been around the block. I didn't need a night out to unwind. I needed a goddamn miracle.

"We'll see." I replied with a tight lip, informing Pam through my body language that the answer was clearly…

'_NO.'_

I hoped she would get that through her thick head one of these days. She knew I didn't like to be pushed. It was one of the reasons we never worked out.

But Pam simply smiled and took a sip from her own glass of tea knowingly.

* * *

A few hours later I was sitting with her in the only other place in town that was open on a Sunday night. The little French restaurant in town. I kept it to myself, but I had the sneaking suspicion that Pam was tricking me into dressing up so she could dump me off at that party afterwards. But I wasn't budging. Not for one second.

I sat across from her taking a sip from my wine and I replied…

"You don't know what you are getting yourself into."

She raised a brow, remaining quiet like she was trained to do, so I would tell her more in the uncomfortable silence, of course falling for her tactic hook, line, and sinker, I accused her…

"Don't even try that crap on me Pam, we've been through this before!"

She took a sip of her wine and met my gaze with a smirk and she replied truthfully…

"She sounds just like you, you know?"

I rolled my eyes, and for a moment felt satisfied that Sookie wouldn't put up with her head shrink crap either, although she needed it more than me and she asked me…

"So has she told you any more about that Deutschebag?"

My glance wavered, thinking back to last night and I shook my head.

"No, between getting my flat tire and spending all day yesterday with my Uncle, there wasn't much time for chit chat."

Pam laughed and she replied...

"Yes, in traditional Northman fashion, you keep your priorities in line by jumping right into the sack, I respect that about you."

I rolled my eyes, and then Pam stopped mid sip and she looked up at me in disbelief...

"Wait a minute! You brought Sookie to see your Uncle?"

Pam's eyes were wide and I looked back at her in annoyance not wanting to get into the whole Sookie thing right now, I hadn't been able to mask my emotions as well as I used to and I tried to get my control back by changing the subject…

"Why are you here Pam? You have friends in Shreveport, closer to work, with far more elaborate accommodations?"

I had to admit although we were the best of friends, very close, which made my other female companions often jealous even, it did strike me as odd that she was here. It would have been much more convenient for her, less time consuming, and easier had she just stayed with one of them. And Pam replied truthfully, reaching over the table and taking my hand in hers as her blue gaze met mine…

"Because, I want to see you happy Eric."

I knew she meant it, but she knew just as well as I that a happy ending was unthinkable after all that had happened to me. She was deluding herself.

"You have no idea what you're talking about…" I finally replied.

"I saw her face this morning, I saw your face, you were both dare I say blissfully happy until…"

"Until reality hit, and it always does."

Pam shook her head and she affirmed it…

"Looks like you two were doing a good job at make believe, sounded like it too."

She smirked. It drove me crazy and I felt like giving her a reality check of my own…

"Yes, pretending works just fine until I found out she had suddenly come to the conclusion that she was bored of me and opted to play the field instead."

Pam smirked and she replied…

"Does it hurt more that she didn't ask you or that she pulled a move out of your old dating hand book?"

I glared at her angrily and she took my other hand in hers and she assured me…

"Eric, I love you, I love you as much as it's possible to love someone without being in love with them, I would do anything for you, you know that."

I met her gaze knowing she was speaking the truth and she continued meeting my glance in earnest…

"But with all due respect, I think you are scared, just like she is. You don't want to get attached because you have lost everything that has ever meant something to you and you don't want to lose any more, and if you don't man up and actually face her, well then you are no better than Godric for chickening out on life."

My eyes flew to hers wondering if she was serious. The woman really knew how to hit me where it hurt most and Pam shook her head, her voice filled with a rare emotion that only a few select people were privy too experiencing…

"I'm not disrespecting him, you know how much I cared about him, you think I don't blame myself too? I know you were there but I was supposed to meet with him (her eyes were sad and earnest) I go through it in my mind over and over again, thinking had I met with him one day earlier, just one day, I could have prevented what could have happened to him, to you, to both of you."

I shook my head not wanting her to blame herself.

"You couldn't have done anything to stop him." I assured her with creased brows.

I had seen the same things Godric saw in the war, the mangled and bloody bodies littering the street like a discarded paper cups and used cigarettes. The disturbing images of our past often haunted me as well, but there was always that choice for me, I could have wound up like Godric too, but I chose to compartmentalize those memories, to bury them away deep in a box, hidden away in a back corner of my mind. He didn't have that choice.

When I thought about him and his loss, it hurt me inside and out, and I felt the pain radiate off me in waves as I relived that night.

After the waiter cleared away our plates, Pam looked at me for a moment and finally confessed…

"Maybe that's why I want to help you so badly, because I owe you, for all the shit you've had to endure since his death."

She bit her lip as if she was biting back tears but I knew Pam would never cry. She hadn't even cried at Godric's funeral. I assured her pulling myself together, because I couldn't let it get to me either. If it did I would fall apart and I don't think Id ever get that control back.

"You don't owe me anything Pam."

I looked back at her voicing my thoughts quietly…

"Maybe this is payback for all the bad things I did, the people I killed over there, all the women I hurt here…Maybe karma finally found me."

Maybe all really was fair in love and war, and in the end you got what you deserved.

She creased her brows and we just looked at each other for a moment in silence. The waiter came back and asked us if we wanted dessert. Thankfully Pam shook her head and refused. I assumed she had taken pity on me.

As agreed I paid the bill and then we were off. In the car ride I asked her about the bar. I had my general manager Chow running things, but it still made me nervous not to be able to do anything. And Pam assured me things were fine…

"Maybe you should bring Blondie by sometime, I bet she'd get a kick out of it."

I looked back at her and shook my head, thinking that was a terrible idea…

Pam returned my glance and she asked me…

"She doesn't know yet does she?"

"No and Id prefer to keep it that way." I answered sharply in warning.

I could tell Pam was biting her tongue; it was torturous for her not to say anything, given her current profession. Finally after a few moments of unbearable silence I replied with a sigh…

"Go ahead get it out, you know you want to."

She sighed turned the corner and replied…

"I'm not going to lecture you…" She paused for a moment and then I looked out the window and recognized the familiar parking lot.

"Pam!" I growled, but her lips simply curved up and she replied smartly as she pulled over into a parking space as my fingers clenched the dashboard my anger growing…

"One spin around the dance floor, one song, and then if you still want to leave, we are as good as gone."

I sighed angrily, a low growl coming out of my mouth and I looked at her with spite…

"So much for support." I gruffed.

She pouted her lips mockingly and looked back at me with a sparkle in her eye. Unbuckling her seat belt she turned off the ignition and opened up her side of the door.

I couldn't wait to get my car back tomorrow, I thought. Then I could get out of this town if even for a few joyous hours, and she replied patting my shoulder and leaning into me as we walked…

"I support you, this is me supporting you."

She smiled back at me and walked ahead. I rolled my eyes knowing you couldn't bull shit a bull shitter watching her strut ahead of me in her very low cut virtually backless designer purple dress with matching pumps and a fuchsia pink purse, I knew this is what she had planned all along. And knowing Pam she probably was going to try to score a date too to top off the night.

"Yeah, well when the shoe is on the other foot, Ill remember what support means to you." I called after her, and walked inside behind her begrudgingly.

No matter what Pam said, I wasn't going to have a good time. I was in no mood to deal with this, to deal with "Her", or her date, up to my eyeballs in angst I think I had reached my weekly quota about 2 weeks ago.

"Ill go get us some drinks." Pam replied with a smirk placing a peck on my cheek as she sashayed up to the bar and began to flirt with the bartender. I wasn't about to tell her I was pretty sure he was gay, just needing to be alone for a moment I walked out back to find a spot to collect my thoughts and get some more fresh air. I finally found a free table near the dance floor and sat down reluctantly.

I didn't see Sookie, not that I was looking, god why would I put myself through that? No, I didn't want to endure any more suffering tonight. Fuck it all; I thought grabbing a pretzel from the complimentary bowl in the center of the table and crunching down on it in frustration.

"Hey hey!" I heard a cheerful voice from behind recognizing Sookie's friend Tara and she sat down opposite me replying with a smirk…

"You made it!"

She eyed me up and down with approval and added…

"Looking hot too by the way."

I was in no mood to smile or joke around and replied nonchalantly…

"Yeah, thanks."

She smiled and crossed her legs towards me. I knew she was most likely here to hit on me, it didn't really matter to me, I was used to it, although part of me found it strangely comforting to see a familiar face nonetheless, someone close to "her", despite her forwardness.

Brushing her long black hair over her shoulders she looked back at me with a flirty smile and remarked…

"So, I heard about the Pussymo…(she caught herself and replied…) I mean your car, sorry about that."

"Not more sorry than I…" I replied staring blankly at the dance floor, bitterly thinking about the loss of my car again, the loss of my freedom, the loss of my balls, and my manhood, the list could really go on and on... I saw Tara look out at the dance floor, then back at me and she asked me point blank...

"So you and Sookie? Tell me the truth, is there something goin on between you two? Cause I cant help but wonder why she acts all epileptic whenever I ask about you, like you got some dark dirty past we all don't know about. You aint one of those pedophiles from Dateline or something are ya?"

Tara was joking of course, trying to lighten the mood, but she didn't know how close she had come to the truth, not the pedophile part, the other part. She certainly knew how to push my buttons, not to mention, the subject I was trying so hard to avoid was suddenly staring me straight in the face again, and it made me quite uncomfortable.

"No there's nothing going on between us." At this point just wanting to get rid of her I looked back at Tara with closure. I knew it was just some innocent flirting on her part, but truly, I was not in the mood right now. Just as I was about to suggest she go find Sookie's brother because one had to be an idiot not to see the sexual tension between the two, another voice from behind crudely broke my concentration…

"Well who's your little friend Tara?" Another woman approached, a sandy blonde followed by her red head friend.

She looked me up and down with an appreciative smile and replied…

"Or shall I say big friend."

Her flirty gaze flicked with mine but Tara answered in defense…

"Go back to Stackhouse Dawn! Maudette, can't you see this man needs some room to breathe without you two succubus's feedin off him?"

"Excuse me? I don't think you are in any position to claim him as yours Tara Thornton, I mean really, you think he'd actually be interested in someone like you?"

"Yeah, men like real women don't ya know!" The other one chided in.

"Yeah your right why would any man want me when he can get 2 for the price of one at the STD Value mart!"

I uncrossed my arms and moved to stand up, this conversation clearly more agitated by the whole situation in general, when a petite, cute little brunette joined the fray putting her hand on my thigh she leaned over giving me a nice flash of her cleavage in the process, and asked me sultrily while Tara tried to fend off the other 2 women…

"How about we let them fight over who gets to talk to you and you let me buy you a drink?"

She smiled and bit her lip, playing with her fruit spear, she pulled the skewer of cherries, pineapple and strawberries out of her drink, stood up straight in front of me and proceeded to lick it from base to tip very suggestively, taking a bite of the strawberry tip, she leaned back down and whispered provocatively…

"Then maybe we can go someplace quiet to talk."

She winked and then twirled her tongue around the other pieces of fruit. Okay I was a man, I couldn't deny her actions had no affect on me, mesmerized by her mouth for just a second but then Sookie's friend yanked me up and barked back at her.

"Am I gonna have to hose you off him, what part of he was talking to me, don't you understand Selah?"

Tara pulled me towards her and she asked me looking like a firecracker about to go off.

"So you wanna dance? Or you wanna let she skank over there continue to blow her fruit in your lap?"

My brow rose, not sure what to say to that. Tara certainly didn't have much of a language censor. But still, I had seen enough. As fun as this could have gone down, I had no desire to dance with any of these people or stay here. And finally I replied…

"I appreciate the offer, but I need to go, excuse me."

I turned around trying to find the quickest get away route, stepping away from the women and that's when I nearly crashed into Pam carrying our drinks.

"Going somewhere?" She asked me with one brow raised, clearly admiring the trail of female eyes following me out. She handed me a glass of vodka, two shots with ice and a twist of lime the way I liked it. And she added with a smirk, one more glance behind me…

"Or should I say running somewhere?"

I took the glass downed it in one swig set it down on the nearest flat surface and replied sharply, and to the point in no mood for our usual verbal sparring match…

"I'm going home Pam."

She took a thoughtful sip from her glass and nodded her head…

"All right, we can go home."

I nodded my head thinking it was about time she came to her senses, ready to lead the way when she stopped me…

"After one dance, you agreed, and you never go back on your word."

I turned to face her glaring and frustrated, but she simply set down her glass and held out her hand to me.

For the love of god! I just wanted to leave for Christ sakes. But Pam wasn't budging. She stood there with her brow raised in challenge until I finally caved. Rolling my eyes I took her palm begrudgingly.

It happened so fast, but through some slight of hand trick, Pam took my hand and put it in the place of another females. I looked at her in question, in no mood for her games, I wasn't in the mood for any cheap thrills tonight, no matter how hot this new girl was.

Then Pam stepped back, unveiling her surprise. She put her hand over mine and I stared back at this woman like a deer caught in the headlights.

_Sookie!_

Standing there in a teal blue mini dress, with a black ribbon satin belt and black heals, my body definitely noticed, the change of scenery, all the sudden on high alert, I could feel the nerve endings light up from my toes through the tips of my fingers like sparks, when the recognition set in.

As all of my feelings rose quickly to the surface, confusion, anger, lust, frustration, heart pounding like some stupid nervous teenager, I heard the familiar tune, Something to Talk About' carry through the warm Louisiana night in the background.

I knew then that I was going to kill Pam.

"Now do you think you two can behave out here or would you like me along to chaperone?" Pam asked us playfully.

All I could do was stare at "her", completely, totally, and utterly blindsided.


	14. Chapter 14

**AN**: Okay, well first of all, I apologize. I was channeling Sookie for this chapter, so if it comes out like her emotions are all over the place, yes thats what I intended, but sorry anyway, hehe. I sort of feel like this is a little bit of a filler chapter because not a whole lot happens, mostly talking, a little angsty, I would say mild angst, to some it might be higher. But its all good talking, getting the ball rolling and pieces set in place. The fun stuff happens in the next two chapters. ;) So atleast you know you have more to look forward to. Anyhow, Ill stop rambling, but thanks again to all of my readers and you wonderful reviewers who brighten my day, xoxox. Luv ya! Hope you likey!

**Chapter 14-Breathe Me**

I stood there unsure of what to say, I had thought of a 101 things I wanted to get off my chest before I saw him, as Pam attempted to pull me aside to talk to her, I knew in the back of my mind it was a trick, I knew she was bringing me to him, but in a way I wanted her to do just that. I hadn't gotten a chance to say much earlier, with him breaking up with me and all before I even had a chance to get a word in edge wise.

I wanted to give him a piece of my mind. I wanted to tell him how I thought he was a jackass to me earlier, how I saw him here with all those women hovering around him, touching him, and how he was no better than me, if not worse for acting so crudely, he was such a hypocrite, but I lost all my words when his eyes entranced me into his stare.

The god-awful song started to play, and people began to dance more spiritedly around us, but we were trapped in that little bubble. I wanted to slap him and kiss him at the same time, hating myself for imagining the latter in my mind a little too long. It was clear the friction and tension between us probably could have started to char the dance floor or something.

I didn't know what to do, noticing we were turning a few heads just standing here doing nothing; I put my hand on his shoulder, the one he wasn't still clutching tightly in his own palm. He looked down at my movement, and hesitantly, yet slowly raised his free hand and placed it on my side. I felt the tingles run down my spine and shivered from his touch as his fingers brushed the exposed skin of my back, holding my breath in anticipation. But neither of us moved our feet.

_They think we're lovers kept under covers  
I just ignore it, but they keep saying  
We laugh just a little too loud  
We stand just a little too close  
We stare just a little too long  
Maybe they're seeing, something we don't, Darlin'_

I looked down at our hands clasped together feeling a wave of emotion and yearning overpower me forgetting all about all that I had been angry about, wanting to suddenly start anew and I began slowly, unsure of what to say, a jumble of words spilling out of my mouth at once…

"Eric, I…I don't…Sam and I are just friends…"

_Shit!_ I shouldn't have said that, realizing somewhere in the battle to find my voice, I had somehow managed to stuff my foot in my mouth instead.

When I looked up into his eyes, I saw that flicker, he had been on the edge ever since this morning, and he was pulling away, emotionally and physically, dropping my hand and his to my dismay.

"No… Eric I didn't mean…" I protested trying to back track, needing to reason with him.

But he turned around and stormed off before I could get a word in edgewise. Then it all came back as to why I was mad at him in the first place. I couldn't believe I had actually felt sorry for him sitting at that table all alone by himself. He had some nerve being upset with me! It wasn't like I had a harem of women around me for the last 10 minutes, it wasn't like I was flirting back and making kissy face with my ex, I saw him the minute he came in, he was hard to miss! The bastard wouldn't even bestow me the courtesy of facing me when I was talking to him? Where the hell did he get off?

I wasn't going to take this lying down. I had spent all afternoon feeling hurt, brokenhearted and guilty, and then "he" actually had the nerve to show up here with Pam on his arm, dressed up, and surrounded by those cheap hussies, Tara excluded of course, but that didn't change things in the slightest.

Unfortunately he was fast and I didn't catch up to him till he got to the parking lot. My face flushed and red from the embarrassment of being left alone on the dance floor, red with anger, and white hot with rage, and finally I just lost it, as soon as he was finally within hearing range, as soon as we had some privacy, and I was good and worked up, like a bomb about to go off, I spat back.

"WHAT'S WRONG? ARE YOU AFRAID TO TALK TO SOMEONE YOU'VE SLEPT WITH MORE THAN ONCE? Afraid, Ill give you cooties too!" I spat back angrily, catching him before he could dive into the nearest car.

He turned around and glared at me. Stepping closer his eyes were lethal, but I wouldn't back down standing my ground, he hissed back sharply…

"I'm sorry for interrupting your Date!"

His voice emphasized the word 'date' and I rolled my eyes meeting his glare…

"Yeah well, I'm sorry to interrupt yours, although I'm not quite sure which one it was!"

He stood up straighter and replied…

"Yes, that must be so devastating for you, to see me with other women."

"Oh you are so mature!"

"Yeah, so was the secret lover thing!"

I was so pissed off in that moment, my blood boiling I raised my hand to slap him, when he caught my wrist mid air and he growled…

"Don't even try it."

I was so fed up with his attitude I shook my hand from his grasp and shoved him into the nearest vehicle. And I growled truthfully…

"I am so glad I found out what an asshole you really are before we went any further!"

He sneered and shook his head, clearly just as angry…

"Yes, good thing you found out what an Asshole I am! I mean Christ, I'm so pathetic I can't even get a date with the woman I'm sleeping with!"

I could see pain in his eyes as I watched him, and it reflected off into me, and I met his gaze with creased brows, clearly also hurting, I tried to explain calmly…

"I know you don't want to hear it, but Sam and I are just friends…"

He shook his head and I looked down at my hands…

"You really need to get a new line."

"I don't want to fight anymore."

His face fell as he looked back at me then down at my hands, taking them in his own he finally replied softly and to my relief…

"Neither do I."

I looked up at him hopefully. And then a voice interrupted us from behind.

"Oh good, my car is still standing!"

She folded her arms and we both stood up straighter to look at her.

"You both certainly know how to stir up the place, remind me to invite you to my next party it will save me money on the entertainment."

I rolled my eyes and Pam met my gaze shaking her head…

"Stop with the tude honey, you made all this trouble yourself, and you! (She looked back at Eric and she asked him..) What did you think after storming off back there that you could click your heals and fly yourself home? Stop running away like a little girl"

She scoffed, flipped her eyes up and mused…

"You both desperately need my help, that much is obvious."

I wasn't about to admit that she was right, not in the mood for one of her lectures but just when I thought she was about to turn into Dear Abby, she handed Eric her car keys and concluded…

"But since you both appear to be talking now, I suggest you do that, and lots of it, its my night off and I fully intend to enjoy this party, with your help or not."

Eric took the keys from her reluctantly and she leaned in and warned me quietly woman-to-woman…

"Tread carefully darling."

I looked back at her and she gave us both a curt nod and then was off.

Which of course left me back at square one with Eric. I wasn't sure where we were now, and I looked back at him in question, and finally he stepped over to where Pam's car was parked and asked me calmer now…

"Do you want a ride home?"

I met his gaze for a minute, and looked back towards the restaurant wondering if Sam would mind that I ditched him. But in truth he had been so busy helping the girls and directing the band, catering, etcetera, I didn't think he would even notice if I had left. It wasn't even a real date, it was more like two friends hanging out, no scratch that, it was like Sam picking me up for work, not that I minded helping out with the plates and silverware, but this was a far cry from the kind of date I fantasized about.

"Sure." I finally agreed nodding and, Eric stepped around to the passenger side door to open it for me.

"Thanks." I replied politely looking up into his deep blue eyes, trying not to react when the hairs on his arm brushed mine as I moved past him. I couldn't register what he was feeling or even thinking at the moment, but I felt apprehensive. With Bill I always knew what to expect, he gave me tell signs on whether or not he'd want to fool around or just talk, but with Eric, he was the master of the poker face, I had to work hard to register what he was thinking and feeling.

I pressed down my teal blue dress and slid inside. A few moments later, he took the seat opposite me. I hadn't even given a moment's pause to how we must have looked in front of everyone, but at the minute, I didn't care and Eric started Pam's car and then we left Merlottes. It was quiet and the fog was creeping out into the roads forcing Eric to put the headlights on high beam.

"Damn fog."

He cursed and I nodded my head in agreement replying…

"I know." It really was getting thick and I suggested…

"Maybe you should pull over."

He looked back at me, and I could feel the tension pouring off him.

"No, I can see just fine."

He answered and I took that as a sign that he still was angry with me.

I remained silent for a minute, the quiet deafening to me. I closed my eyes imagining that Eric had listened to me and…

_He pulled over on the side of the road putting the car in park. I looked back at him and he looked at me, like a predator, and then my lips were on his as his tongue meshed with mine. All of the emotions that had been pent up inside of me all day came pouring out. I put both my hands on the side of his face wanting to have him right here, all of him. My body remembered exactly what it felt like to be with him and I wanted to experience that again. Climbing over him and straddling his lap, I ground my hips over his desperately._

_I opened my mouth further and dove my hand down into his pants, matching the rhythm of my pelvis. He gasped as I began to pump him but then his hand grabbed my wrist and his deep blue eyes flicked with mine…_

"Sookie, I can't do this."

Huh? I tried to gain my composure and come back to reality as I looked back at, him, his words taking me out of my happy place, and as the realization finally hit me, my face fell into a frown.

Not only sexually frustrated but also dumped, twice?

I could feel the physical frustration already and I looked back at him angered, but underneath it all my brows creased in disappointment.

"Are you actually breaking up with me again?"

I shook my head and looked out my window. Truthfully if we weren't moving I would have pulled on the handle and jumped out into the white mist, just to escape this horrible cramping sensation I felt in my stomach as it flopped over in dread.

"I didn't say that, but we have to talk."

Oh boy, I didn't know whether to be comforted by the fact that he wouldn't admit to my accusation or the fact that he wanted to talk now. I did not like those 5 little words. I had never heard them before live, but Id seen enough movies and television shows to know it wasn't good. And with all the chaos in our lives lately, those 5 little words shook me.

He turned my hand over in his, and I replied quietly, immune to his charms, curious yet fearful at the same time, my body tense…

"Okay, so talk."

He took a deep breath and finally after a long moment he answered, his blue gaze locking with mine…

"I think…Tonight I had a wake up call. After everything that has happened, in the last few days, in the last couple weeks, maybe we need to take a step back, this, whatever this is, is moving too fast."

"What?" I asked him shocked he of all people would say such a thing, but he explained turning my limp hand over in his…

"Sookie, I care about you, I'm not doing this because I'm scared or because I don't like you and I'm looking for a way out, I'm doing this to give you some space, to figure things out."

I met his gaze confused my jaw falling slack, all I could hear was his words without the 'not' part…

"This still sounds like you are breaking up with me." I declared.

He sighed for a moment and he replied…

"It sounds to me like you want us to be together, like as a couple, in a relationship."

Okay, I couldn't pretend that didn't hurt. Like claws running across my back, slicing through my skin digging in sharply in excruciating pain. He so obviously didn't feel the same as me.

"What are you saying then?" I asked him dropping his hand and folding my arms, noting the claustrophobic feeling in here.

Unfortunately, he continued to my dismay…

"Well I'm just basing my interpretation on your request to keep our relationship secret."

And battleship sunk.

I glared out the window because he was maddening to talk to, he was driving me insane, and I wanted to get out of here like yesterday.

"Sookie, please look at me." He asked and I begrudgingly met his stare with anger and hurt filled eyes.

"Whatever we were, are (he corrected himself), I'm not even going to try to label it, but I think it would be wise to figure things out before we end up really hurting each other. Everything has been so crazy lately, especially for you, you just got out of a 6 month relationship, you just turned down an engagement, I understand now why you agreed to go out with your boss…You needed a time out, you know it, I know it, and I want to give that to you, for as long as you need it."

I closed my eyes still in shock silent for a moment and he leaned in to kiss my cheek tenderly whispering in my ear, he added…

"You need to find yourself Sookie."

The tears welled in the corner of my eyes and I felt like his lips had stung me. I didn't want to look at him, although somewhere deep down, I couldn't help but think maybe he had a point. We did kind of rush into things, like a ball of fire, we were bound to hurt something or each other if we weren't careful. But that didn't mean I had to like it, my stomach sinking with empty pits, when it finally registered what Eric was saying.

I was being rejected. Kindly, but rejection was still rejection.

"I'm still here for you Sookie, I'll always be here for you."

"I appreciate that." I replied numbly, although I felt like we were now just going through the motions. Did he really mean he would be here for me or did he just want to spare my feelings?

We had arrived at the house and I stared out the window at our front porch, noting the fog was now lifting unveiling the cold harsh reality of everything once more. The sooner I realized that I couldn't live in a bubble, the better off I would be.

"Sookie?" I could tell he knew something was off, based on my very pregnant pause but I just shook my head, not wanting to do this, he didn't need to persuade me, and the last thing I wanted to do was talk any more. All talking ever seemed to do was get me in more trouble.

"It's fine, I'm fine."

I couldn't breath any more needing to get out of the car; I took my seat belt off, shoved the door open and gulped in the cool air as I stepped outside shutting the door behind me.

I heard Eric rush out as well; slamming his door hurriedly and he had caught up to me in two seconds flat.

"Sookie wait."

I closed my eyes.

He put his large hands on my shoulders turning me to face him and he asked quietly…

"Listen, if you don't want to do this, we don't have to, I just can't go back to pretending, I can't…"

I looked up into his deep blue eyes thinking he was about to say something hurtful, like I cant be with you because I could never love someone like you, and I shook my head cutting him off before he could stab the knife further…

"No, I want to do this, you're right, we should take a step back..."

I replied as I heard my voice laced with fear betray me. Looking up into his eyes, I knew the only way he would believe me is if I looked at him, although it pained me to do so, hiding the sadness in my voice I replied.

"We can just be friends."

I even forced a small pathetic smile, thinking at least that was better than the alternative of getting dumped 3 times in a row.

He met my gaze a mixture of emotions traveling across his blue gaze as well until finally he pulled me into his embrace.

"You'll thank me later." He replied softly trying to reassure me but I didn't want to hear it. Feeling sad and depressed, I leaned into him, knowing I would miss this, not quite sure why it suddenly felt like I was losing a limb rather than a lover.

"Yeah." I agreed weekly no longer wanting to speak; I rested my head against his shoulder and closed my eyes willing this night away.

"You are going to be the death of me." Eric whispered, giving me another squeeze before we went inside.

I think I had gotten a little over 5 hours of sleep. All I could think about was my breakup with Bill, and how I felt in some way that had sabotaged my relationship with Eric, or whatever this was we were doing.

I kept going through every possible range of emotion when it came to thinking of him. From anger to rage, to yearning to sadness, I felt it all. The only way I could turn it off was by forcing myself up out of bed.

There was still a small part of me that wanted to run to Eric and let him kiss away my troubles while wrapped in his arms, but the other part of me wanted to sort through this. I felt like I owed it to myself.

I wanted to be the strong capable independent woman my Gran could be proud of.

So when I went downstairs to have breakfast, noting that Eric's seat at the breakfast table was not set, I didn't even ask where he was until my Gran brought him up. She was busy getting everything ready for the bake sale tomorrow rolling out cookie batter and measuring flower for her double layer chocolate cake when she mentioned that Pam had brought Eric over to pick up his car.

I thought momentarily about my visit to see Eric's uncle, and then our amazing night afterwards. My heart secretly ached, but I remembered again about my pact to myself, and to Eric last night. We had to get our crap together first. Even if it still left a bitter taste in my mouth.

I sat down with my bowl of cut up honeydew melon and strawberries eating a few pieces and then my Gran asked me the inevitable question…

"So what happened between you and Bill? I couldn't help but notice you went to the party with Sam last night and I haven't heard you mutter a single syllable about him since I've been back."

I swallowed my bite of melon although it was slow going down because I had suddenly lost my hunger. I didn't know what to say to my Gran, I never lied to her, and I didn't want to start now, but I didn't want to get into what happened with Bill right now, so I told her as much as I could…

"He proposed to me and I didn't accept, so we broke up."

Her face fell, and she set down her spatula walked over to me and wrapped her arms around me.

"Oh baby girl, I'm so sorry."

I couldn't help it, the emotion was spinning around me and I felt tears pierce the sides of my eyes once more, wondering why I had felt so emotional lately, and I admitted sadly, shaking my head….

"I didn't want to disappoint you, I'm so sorry Gran."

"Why on Earth would you think you could ever disappoint me? That isn't even physically possible!"

She hugged me again in assurance, and although she made me feel better, I couldn't help but wonder if maybe I should have accepted. At least then I would have had a normal life, well as normal as possible.

Gran put her hand on my shoulder and she sat down across from me, explaining…

"I want you to go out, get out of this house and see the world. I know I've said it before, but you have been so responsible your whole life, my lord, you were forced to grow up and be an adult when you were just a child! You deserve the break for once. Marriage is grown up business, to which I'm sure you will be very good at when your ready, but if that little voice inside your head told you no, when Bill asked, then I'm sure you were right."

I smiled faintly not sure whether or not to feel comforted by her words or troubled and she concluded…

"I'm glad you went out with Sam last night, he's a cutie pie, back in my day I would have gobbled him right up, but then again…So is Eric."

She winked at me and I was sure my face colored pink as my head began to spin wondering if she knew anything. I quickly took a sip of my juice and then she stood up and announced noting a blissful aroma coming out of the oven…

"Well I better get back to work if I ever want to get these done by tonight."

I nodded, not wanting her to bother her any longer, and I dove into my bowl. That was until I saw Eric's little red riding hood pull up in the driveway, his car parked next to mine. I swallowed apprehensively, nervous all of the sudden to face him in the light of day and I shot up out of my chair.

"What's the hurry? (My Gran was about to say more when she heard the car door close and looked out the window smiling, she announced...) Oh good Eric is back, I want him to try my new double fudge brownie recipe, you can try some too if you want, they will be done in just a minute."

"Ah no Gran, that's okay, I...I'm trying to watch my weight." I lied noting that Eric was starting to approach the front door. I didn't want to run into him, listening to my Grans lecturing as I tossed my dish in the sink and made a beeline for the stairs she called after me...

"Now that is just hogwash, you don't have a weight problem and you never did, and I have half a mind to add more butter and sugar to this recipe, and make you eat every last bite to prove it!"

But I was already gone. I didn't know why I was anxious about it, but I didn't want to see him right now. After yesterday, and our conversation, well I felt kind of like the one who got the short straw and I didn't quite know how to act like a gracious loser. I heard Eric come in and talk to my Gran, she was good at buttering him up, and then finally he left and I saw him head out back to do more work.

I took it as a sign that the coast was clear and decided there was one thing I could do to make things right again. It had been almost a week since I last lay out in the sun and my body craved the warmth. So I changed into my bikini, grabbed a glass of ice tea on my way out, found the recliner, adjusted it to an angle that caught as much sun as possible, slid on my glasses, and dove into the book Eric's uncle gave me, bathing happily in the blissful heat.

About 30 minutes later I sat up to take a sip of tea, setting my book down on the table, admittedly enjoying the pictures more than the words, I was just about to turn over on my chest and rest my brain when I heard a voice approach me from behind…

"Well, well, well, something tells me this little display isn't just about baking in the sun is it?"

I looked up and saw Pam standing there, sporting a pair of skinny jeans, the kind that only super models could truly pull off with a white short sleeved baby doll blouse and fitted red sweater vest, paired with black stiletto mary janes. She always had a way of making me feel inadequate, or in this case quite naked. I quickly straightened up my bikini top grabbed my towel to cover me, sat up and I explained curtly…

"Not that it's any of your business, but he was the one who broke things off, despite what you might think, not everything I do happens to be about Eric or anyone else. I enjoy a good sunbath every now and then."

Pam smirked and she took a seat in the old wooden throwback chair next to me, crossing her long legs she replied smartly…

"No, I didn't say everything was about him but it's interesting that you thought I assumed it was."

Pam winked at me and I rolled my eyes. I took a sip from my tea, a deep breath and I lay back down on the recliner asking her casually in a discreet effort to change the subject…

"So did you get his car back?"

Pam chuckled again and she replied…

"For someone who doesn't care much about Eric, you sure are making a case for yourself."

"For someone who got free room and board, you sure have a funny way of showing graciousness to your hostess." I countered and Pam smirked back at me. She uncrossed her legs, and switched directions replying…

"He cares for you Sookie, deeply. Taking a step back may have been Eric's idea but that doesn't mean it has to be a permanent step."

I turned to her not really liking the tune this conversation was taking, especially because it sounded like Eric had told Pam about our personal business, which angered me more, and I asked her sharply…

"Tell me Pam, does Eric have you to translate his feelings to all his women? Because frankly, it's really annoying."

Pam looked back at me thoughtfully for a moment, I could tell she was deciding on her words and she finally replied…

"I forget that I need to butt out sometimes, it's the head shrink in me, I'm pretty sure it's the reason Eric and I broke up, but despite what you might think of his nosy and pushy ex, I only poke fun because I know you two really like each other, and you shouldn't be off here pretending you don't give a crap and he shouldn't be off festering away in this blistering heat...Trust me, he's just as stubborn as you."

She gestured to the back part of the yard and I saw shirtless sweaty Eric pulling together a couple different shovels, some stakes and rope into a pile on the lawn.

He was definitely a sight for sore eyes, but I would never admit that to Pam of all people.

"We went out during college you know, I won't get into the gory details, but as you are well aware, he's something else in bed."

Shivers ran through my body as I recalled the last time we made love. Yes, he was exceptional in the sack, that was a given. Although every fiber of my being hated Pam for being able to compare that same experience with me, and bringing it up again, nevertheless, she continued…

"And that's pretty much all we did, like rabbits, that was the basis of our relationship."

I tried not to picture it, my hands clenching around the end of the recliner chair and I hoped she would be getting to her point soon, because I wasn't about to sit here and listen to her talk about her old sex life with Eric.

"Yes there were a few casual dates sprinkled in between, and we went out for a long time, in fact, one of the longest relationships I had, but I could never get inside his head. He held that part of himself back from me. I think ultimately, it was that maddening trait that drove us apart.

Ironically, after the break up, which was my most civil, agreeable, and easiest split ever, we became closer. He still hasn't opened up about everything, which drives me crazy sometimes, especially given my profession, but we respect each other more. I think we work out much better as friends than we ever did lovers."

I looked back at her incredulously thinking she certainly knew how to pack a punch. I mean was I supposed to know all of this? Did I even want to?

"Is there a reason you are telling me this?" I replied dryly trying to contain my shock. She looked back at me and paused for a moment, making me think I was the one out of line, when she finally replied sternly…

"Yes, there is. I'm telling you this because unlike me, he is more open with you."

I scrunched my nose and rolled my eyes not sure what her game was, but Pam continued…

"Despite what you may believe, it was almost a year before I got to meet Fintan."

She looked over at the book on the small table next to my chair and pulled out the picture I had been using as a bookmark studying it.

"He's shown me this before too." Pam remarked flashing me the picture of Eric and his mother, noting that Fintan was very proud of this picture and the people in it.

"If I didn't love him so much, and if I didn't like you so much, I might be jealous."

I creased my brows not really understanding what she was trying to say, and Pam concluded…

"He keeps his uncle very close to him, he is extremely protective of Fintan…."

I pushed my arm up, leaning on it as she slid the photo back in the marked page carefully.

"With all due respect Sookie, and speaking as a friend and nothing else...Sitting around and waiting for the world to come together and suddenly make sense is a fools dream. The real enlightenment is in living it. Life is short, don't wait too long to figure yourself out, you need to meet him half way too."

I looked back at her feeling strange for a moment.

"I have to get back to work."

And with that, she set the book back down on the table, stood up, and left. I sat up and looked out noting that Eric was further back in the yard, digging what I could only describe as a trench.

I did want to go to him, I didn't really realize it till now, but I missed him. I looked down at that old tattered black and white photo poking out of the book but I was scared to take it out and look at it, really look at it because I was afraid it would stir more emotion in me. But I didn't want more emotion; I didn't need any more emotion. Not when I was pressed flat up against a wall. I didn't know where Eric was mentally right now, I wasn't used to that. As I said, Bill was always easier to read. What if he hurt me? What if we tried again but it was so bad I never trusted a man again?

I didn't really want to think about it. Eric had said all he needed to say last night. I knew he was bored with me; he wanted to let me down easy, despite what Pam claimed. He hadn't said one word to me today, not that I gave him a chance, but actions spoke louder than words. As I looked up at him digging away, his actions told me everything I needed to know.

The sun had been hiding behind some clouds, ever since Pam left and I sighed still frustrated. I had today off and overcast just wouldn't do. The book although a lovely gesture was a little bit advanced for me right now, so I decided to go back inside. I had to admit, it was starting to drive me a little crazy now that my Gran had ordered me not to do anymore work. What else was there to do? I wanted to feel useful in some way, and I really needed to get my mind off things. Maybe pulling a few weeds would help, I thought hopefully. I brought my book and glass back inside, about to find a pair of shorts when. I heard Jason's voice in the other room.

"Yeah, so you know Eric's lady friend, you think she'd want to come too?"

"I don't know darling, maybe you should ask Eric, but I think she went to work."

It was then that I stopped in my tracks, because I figured whatever Jason was about to suggest if I stepped foot in that room, he'd want me to ask Eric and I wasn't ready for that yet. Things were too weird between us right now.

So I quickly tip toed back into the living room and waited for Jason to leave before I decided to grab the scoop from my Gran.

"Was that Jason I saw leaving?" I asked her trying to act breathless like I just missed him and she gave me a nod and smile.

"Yes, he's just asking Eric if he and Pam would like to join him to the Shreveport fair, He got 4 free tickets from work, but they are only good for today."

"Oh."

She waited till I met her gaze and she replied with a twinkle in her eye...

"Well he's inviting you too of course, honey."

I nodded and, my Gran continued...

"I think it would be fun for you, tomorrow Ill be at the bake sale in the morning, but I made sure to have them let me leave early so we can celebrate your birthday."

I looked back at her doubtfully not sure if I wanted to go out, part of me wondered if Eric was going, and I thought he most likely wasn't. Going out with me wasn't part of the 'giving me my space' arrangement. I wondered suddenly why it felt almost like I was being punished, and I replied truthfully...

"I don't know Gran you're so busy with the church, I just don't really feel like celebrating this year, Id be fine if we just stayed home." I explained.

She paused for a long minute and finally remarked...

"Honey, I know things have been hard for you, after Bill but if you think for one split second that I'm going to let you stay at home alone on your birthday, and we aren't going to celebrate it in style you can think again."

I pursed my lips frustrated, and she shook her head.

"There's nothing to debate, you should know better by now."

"I know, I'm sorry Gran." I replied, and she handed me a plate of still warm from the oven brownies. How could I resist? I thought taking one she asked me...

"Speaking of, I'm sorry to bring this up, but have you seen Bill lately? I guess some of the ladies from the bake sale have been trying to contact him, he was going to bring the cash box along, but no one can reach him."

I looked back at her strangely and shook my head. I hadn't seen Bill since that night he nearly scared me half to death in the parking lot at Merlottes, and honestly, I was partially relieved for that. I didn't know how to bridge the gap between what had happened to a resolution for both of us. So Bill made my job easier in a way.

"Don't worry about it honey, Ill just have Maxine bring hers." She winked at me, and I grabbed a glass of ice-cold milk to go along with my brownie. Sitting down at the table to enjoy it, I took one bite swallowing it and that's when Jason came back. I didn't know why I felt so nervous all of the sudden, but I was, my palms clammy and butterflies swimming.

"So what's the verdict?" Gran asked him.

I took another swallow of my milk to clear my throat and watched him on the edge of my seat.

"Well it don't look like she can make it, she's got meetins all afternoon."

I frowned thinking that was the end of it then. He wasn't coming. And then Jason concluded.

"But Eric's gonna go, said he's just gotta take a shower first."

Unbeknownst to me, all of the sudden my heart started to thump heavily and my lips curved upwards into a huge smile.


	15. Chapter 15

**AN: **So we finally get to the fair, yeye. I apologize this chapter is a little longer than the others, I had alot I wanted to get in so it streched out a little. I suspect 16 will be the same. Also, I have to vent, it looks like ffnet took away the chapter break feature, so I will have to go back at some point and edit this fiction and most of my others, because I know just as well as everyone else, how frustrating it is to read things all lumped together. Thats one of the reasons I chose to post my stories on ffnet in the first place. So boo ffnet for taking that away. :p Anyway, Im sorry you have to sort through that. It doesnt look like Im going to have much time other than for writing to go back and edit, so hopefully my apology will suffice for now. Know that I want to go back and clean things up, but youd rather get a new chapter than have me spend the next couple weeks editing right? ;) So yeah, anyway, I think this chapter speaks for itself. Poor Sook is still mixed up, but I think shes starting to see the light. Thanks always to everyone for reading and reviewing. Hope you like this one too! :)

**Chapter 15-Crystal Ball**

I was going to spend the afternoon running errands, it was rare to have two days off in a row, and if Gran had anything to say about it, I wasn't working on my birthday either. Part of me wanted to feel useful and almost resented this new mantra she had been promoting, but I didn't have time to give it a second thought before Tara arrived. She got the 4th ticket by default, not that I would ever tell her that Jason had tried to invite Pam first, but after 5 minutes with Tara, I rethought that decision.

I was up in my room brushing out my hair trying to decide on what barrette to wear when Tara barged in and plopped down on my bed.

"So how long have you and Tall, Blonde, and Handsome been goin at it?"

I looked back at her my face now a complimentary yet mortified shade of red, and I asked her...

"Excuse me?"

There was no way I was dignifying that question with an answer ignoring her and Tara smirked and stood up, so that I was forced to see her while I looked at my reflection in the mirror.

"Oh I think you heard me. And all this time I thought you were still mopin over Bill, hell I wondered if you even may have gone back to the fucker, but it looks like you found greener pastures."

I rolled my eyes turned to look at her and replied...

"Tara I have no idea what you are talking about, Eric and I are just friends."

Tara folded her arms and gave me a 'please don't insult my intelligence' glare.

"Yeah, friends who could start a small forest fire with just one look. It all makes sense now."

I finished pinning my barrette in, I stepped around her clearly needing to avoid this topic, I pretended I was busy straightening out my blue sun dress and slipped on my grey cardigan incase it got cold later. But she remained silent forcing me to turn and look at her in question and she continued to my dismay...

"That's why he was ignoring all those other women at the party, he barely even mumbled two words to me, and that knockout he came in with didn't even get a 2nd glance once you came strolling up to him."

She shook her head...

"And that whole walkin on sunshine routine the other day, that was him too!"

Tara chuckled and she looked back at me in amusement. I didn't like her all up in my private business. She was just like Pam, not wanting to admit any of that, because in truth, Eric was the one who dumped me right after the party. So maybe he had second thoughts about those other girls and just wanted to use my issues as his get out of jail free card.

"Tara, you are letting your imagination run wild, please, me and Eric? Where would you get such a silly idea?" I asked knowing even as the words had come out of my mouth that God himself was about to come in and strike me down for being such a terrible liar.

"Wake up and smell the bacon grease girl! He's into you, and you're into him. I can't believe I didn't see it before, no wonder you hesitated when I asked you if he was free."

Tara winked at me and I shook my head weakly, knowing I was fighting an uphill battle.

"But one thing, I don't get, why Sam? Did y'all have a fight or something and you wanted to make him jealous?"

"Tara please!" I insisted she stop.

She wouldn't leave me alone about Eric. But lucky for me, they were apparently ready downstairs. And Jason yelled impatiently up the stairs...

"Are y'all comin or not, cause I'm bettin we could both find a couple other willin skirts to accompany us if ya aint?"

Tara rolled her eyes and she hollered down the stairs...

"Don't be so sure about that Stackhouse, I think they all might miss you hidin back there in Eric's shadow!"

I couldn't help but giggle at Tara, thankful to her for at least calming my nerves a little because I was wound up pretty tightly otherwise, unsure of what to expect this afternoon. I put one more coating of pink candy lip gloss smoothed out my hair, slipped on my flats and then we were off.

The nervousness came back the minute I got down stairs and realized he wasn't there. Eric and Jason were already outside waiting when Tara and I arrived apparently. My Gran wanted to say goodbye and give us both some chocolate chip cookies for the road. I swear she was trying to turn me into a pumpkin but I could never refuse chocolate chip, even when my stomach was doing flip flops. The cookie took my mind off things for a moment, but the minute my gaze caught Eric's I felt that anxiety return. His eyes were a cool sky blue and he was wearing his favorite green tee with a pair of denims. Any other guy would have just looked average, but with Eric, he always looked amazing. Which didn't really help my nerves any. I felt like I was going on a blind date for some reason, not quite sure what to expect, but Eric broke the ice first.

"Hi." He replied with a soft smile directed at me, then as Tara came onto the scene he nodded to both of us.

"Hey." I answered back softly my insides doing crazy things at the moment, not sure what else to say, but at least things seemed amicable, it was better than fighting, so that was a good start. Eric had opened the back panel door of Jason's truck helping me inside like a gentleman, while I heard Tara remark from behind.

"Yeah, hi handsome, nice too see you again, glad to see you've made yourself at home here."

She replied smugly her glance cast towards me in gesture and my face turned red. Ready to swat her when she came back here and joined me, but I didn't want Eric to see my face, so I pretended to rummage through my purse. My arm still tingled from where he touched me and I crossed my legs and began to bounce my foot nervous again wondering how I was going to get through today, praying silently to not let things be awkward between us.

Maybe I could just hang out with Tara, after I strangled her that was, and Eric could bond with Jason. Over what, I had no idea, but I'm sure they could figure it out. He reached his hand out to help Tara inside too, but Tara insisted...

"Nah you two sit in back, Stackhouse here needs my expert navigational skills because he has issues when it comes to reading those road signs."

"Just cause I like to take my time going through a stoplight don't mean I got issues. And can you blame me? Jenny Lee Higgins was crossin the street in that tiny little halter top and short shorts." Jason argued, he smiled cockily back at Eric as if another man would understand and Tara muttered a ...

"Uh huh, yeah tell it to the judge."

Eric grabbed the roof and climbed inside. Sliding in next to me I held my breath noting the rear of the cabin seemed to be getting really hot all of the sudden.

Tara pushed back the seat upright and slid into the passenger side next to Jason. He smiled and started up the truck, his huge dual engine roaring into life.

"Now y'all buckle in tight cause this baby can really ride it hard, she takes after her daddy!" I knew Tara wouldn't be able to resist that one and true to form she replied...

"So in other words, your sayin you're in an incestuous relationship with this pick up truck, is that right?"

"What? No that's disgusting!" Jason replied in outraged.

Tara rolled her eyes in her rear view mirror but I barely heard them, wondering why I had started to suddenly feel so dizzy. Oh yeah, that's right, I had forgotten to breathe.

I opened up my window and took a few deep breaths, my skin hot and sticky, the air felt nice and cool against my cheek. And then my skin lit up like it was on fire.

"You know, you might be a lot cooler if you took that sweater off, it's 90 something degrees outside." Eric replied lowly leaning into me flashing that devilish smirk. Apparently, Eric wasn't affected in the slightest by our conversation yesterday. I had no idea if that was a good or bad sign, but was leaning towards the latter. I looked back at him, now knowing where the heat flash had come from and it wasn't going anywhere my eyes locking in on his mouth. I suddenly had a flashback of those lips on my body, doing deliciously wicked things to me and I quickly looked back out the window replying through a strained voice...

"Jason can you turn up the AC, all the way please? _I'm fine_" I replied under my breath sneaking a glance back at Eric through lowered lashes.

"Yeah, it just takes a good 10 minutes to kick in all the way." Jason replied.

I saw Eric flipping his cell phone out to text someone. Naturally curious I found my eyes wandering to the screen but I couldn't quite make out the words blocked by his big hands. _Yes, those hands…_ I felt the temperature go up another 10 degrees and I began to fan myself with my purse, knee bobbing now along with my foot.

He stopped texting and smirked back at me. I quickly averted my eyes not wanting to be caught spying, it was rude after all to text when you had company and I would remind him of that if he questioned me but he simply smiled and explained...

"Pam says hi, and she hopes we have a good time."

"Who's Pam?" Tara asked overhearing from the front. And Jason replied...

"Only the hottest supermodel since Claudia Schiffer."

"Oh that's the blonde right?" Tara asked and Jason nodded enthusiastically, followed by another eye roll from Tara.

"Dude, I don't know why you let that one get away!"

Jason looked back at Eric in his rear view mirror and Eric glanced back at me briefly before replying modestly...

"Things didn't work out."

Tara smirked and she told Jason...

"You actually think you'd stand a chance with her Stackhouse? Isn't she a psychologist or somethin?"

"Psychiatrist." Eric corrected her.

"Well head shrink or not, she's fucking hot." Jason replied.

Now granted, my brother could be quite thoughtful at times, but today he was giving us the actual illustration of the term bonehead, I was sure Tara was about to slug him, but I thought she could use some back up and I replied defensively...

"Some people want more than just a hot body Jason, beauty fades..."

Or at least I hoped that much was true.

"On some it does, others just stay timeless." Eric replied with a small smile cast in my direction. My face turned pink again.

"Just wait honey, someday you're gonna have a bony white wrinkled ass too." Tara added ruffling her hand through Jasons hair playfully.

Jason scrunched up his nose and turned on the radio. I took that as signal that the conversation was over. To which I was thankful for.

Of course that didn't stop my mind from wandering, I wondered what Eric might look like as an older man, stealing another quick glance I knew I didn't even have to wonder, he would be amazingly attractive well into his 90's, he was definitely timeless.

Tara changed the station to something a little less country and a little more peppy and she concluded...

"You white people have a knack for finding the most depressing music."

xxxxx

We got to the fair and Tara announced…

"Okay, first things first."

"Yeah, first we hit the fun house." Jason announced with a smirk and I looked back at him oddly wondering if he was making up for some lost childhood moment, because as far as I could remember, we never splurged for those kinds of unnecessary extremities.

"A fun house? You mean one of those light show, hall of mirror, hamster wheel looking contraptions? You'd actually pay to go in one of those?" Tara asked him, but Jason just simply grabbed her hand and jogged over to the ticket stand. Leaving Eric and I with no choice but to follow.

Once inside, it was clear to see what the theme was and all I could think was, Tara would have a field day with this one. Unicorns and fairies adorned the walls in neon colors lit up by the black lights overhead. Tara's tank top was glowing blue, but Jason was on some sort of mission. He pulled her along quickly making it hard for me to keep up in the dark. Meanwhile I felt Eric's heat behind me. It was stuffy and hot in here and I couldn't help but take off my cardigan and tie it around my waist, already feeling 100% better once it was gone. I could breathe again.

"Jason will you wait up!"

It was like a labyrinth and as I hurried to catch them I realized I had lost Eric. I turned around, trying to remember which way I had come, venturing forth, I realized I was in the hall of mirrors. Well at least I was going forward I thought. Although I wasn't really a fan of these confined spaces.

"Hey! Guy's wait up, I have no idea where I am." I spoke realizing the only person looking back at me was my reflection. I tried to turn a corner realizing it was just a mirror that looked like a corner, so I turned back around thinking maybe I could retrace my steps, although the panic was starting to set in now. Despite this just being some stupid kiddy game, I didn't like it.

They really needed a panic button or something when someone got stuck in one of these things, because that's how I felt, stuck.

I looked at my reflection in another mirror, suddenly feeling reminded of that day I stared at the reflection in my bathroom mirror and broke it. It wasn't because I was angry with Bill, it was because I was trapped, stuck in this box, which is exactly how I felt right now.

My breathing grew heavier as I felt like all the oxygen was being sucked out of the room, and then I saw another person and I tensed up. My eyes flashed up and when the recognition came, relief flew over me like nothing I had felt before.

"Eric oh thank god!"

I turned to face him thinking I would be standing opposite him a good few feet away, but I ended up slamming into his chest. My temperature went back up, but my head was too busy swimming to notice.

"Sookie?"

His concerned eyes glowed in the dim light and I felt my heart jump when I looked up at him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah…yeah I'm fine, I'm just not crazy about these things." I replied more composed trying to cover up my embarrassment from that minor little freak out I just had, but for some reason I couldn't let go of him. My heart hammered wildly in my chest.

He smoothed back my hair with his large hand smiling in comforting assurance and then he placed my hand in his and replied calmly…

"Come on, I know a short cut out of here."

That brought a smile to my face and I nodded accepting his invitation. As promised, Eric had somehow managed to find a back door. We didn't even have to go through the damn hamster wheel and as we found our way back to the front, Tara and Jason came out laughing, but stunned to see us out there waiting for them.

"Hey, how'd you beat us out?"

Jason asked and I felt embarrassed again not wanting to admit I was too chicken shit to get through the rest, but Tara saved me…

"Sorry sugar, looks like unicorns and fairies aint everyone's cup of tea."

"Hey!" Jason argued and Eric replied…

"It's true, I had to get out of there, those things terrify me."

Then I couldn't help but laugh, because I had to admit Eric was funny. Tara and Jason laughed too and we ventured over to the food.

"Deep fried cherry pie? So you weren't lying?" I remarked looking back at Eric with a smirk and he smiled and nodded…

"Nope, can't beat that heart attack on a stick, you want one?" He asked me already heading over to the stand. I shook my head and scrunched up my nose…

"No I think, Ill pass, that's too rich for my blood."

"That sounds good." Jason replied brightly and followed Eric in line.

"Mama's catfish, clam, and sausage jambalaya!" Tara proclaimed excitedly yanking me over to the sea food stand with her.

"Wow that looks amazing!" I remarked watching someone else walk away with a bowl and Tara asked me, out of the blue…

"So you think you're brother has a girlfriend right now?"

I met her gaze offering her a smirk and I answered smugly…

"Why sweetie, do you have someone you want to set him up with? I mean make him feel at home with?"

Hey this teasing thing could work both ways, I thought, and Tara rolled her eyes and explained defensively…

"No, I was just wondering, Dawn hadn't mentioned anything about him for awhile."

I nodded my head and thought Id take the high road, offering Tara a bone I finally replied…

"Well I don't know about anyone else, but I don't think he's been seeing Dawn for a couple months now, they had a big fight and she kicked him out."

Tara rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath…

"What a bitch."

I smiled to myself knowing Tara had a little crush on my brother, although she'd never admit it, and Jason was completely clueless.

I didn't want to meddle but found myself saying as we got up to the counter to order…

"You know Jason loves shrimp gumbo, it's his favorite in fact."

Tara's smile brightened. The server asked her what she wanted to order and she replied…

"Yeah, Ill take two jambalayas and one shrimp gumbo."

"No, make it 3 jambalayas." I replied handing Tara a $10, and I explained to her…

"Something for Eric too."

Now it was her turn to smile smugly and she replied as the short order cook got us our dishes of food…

"Nothing's going on my ass."

I rolled my eyes and turned from her just simply took the two bowls of jambalaya with a heaping serving of corn bread on top and carried it over to a table where we could all eat.

Jason and Eric sat down shortly after with two bottles of beer and their fried cherry pie they looked like two very happy men. Tara ran up to grab some drinks for us, and I told her to get me a strawberry lemonade, they were to die for.

Eric looked at the bowl of mixed rice, veggies, sausage, and seafood in front of him curiously and I explained…

"You should try it, its good, very southern. Jason, Tara got you the gumbo."

Jason's face cracked into a smile as Tara came back with our drinks she asked us…

"So what did I miss?"

Jason took a swig from his beer and wrapped one arm around Tara's shoulder in a full nelson gesture and he replied happily…

"You're fuckawesome Sugar!" And without much warning he planted a big kiss on Tara's cheek, she shrieked in surprise and I swear I actually saw her blush.

Tara blushing was an anomaly in itself and she coughed to cover up any odd noises of shock and dismay, needing to find her tomboy posterior she barked back…

"You think I can get a warning next time Stackhouse?"

I stole a glance back at Eric, who's eyes flashed with mine and I suddenly wondered what was going on in that head of his when he revealed two bags of tom thumb donuts he had been hiding on the bench.

"Don't think you're the only ones who can put out."

He replied smartly, noting the surprised look on our faces.

"Damn straight." Jason replied clearly having found a new best friend in Eric, and Tara knocked him back down to ground level…

"Yeah, I bet you didn't cough in a red cent though didja?"

"It's the thought that counts." Jason replied still trying to sound cool in front of Eric, but after a few moments of female death glares directed at him, he finally surrendered and replied…

"Ill win you one of those stuffed animal things later okay?"

Tara didn't even bother at that point.

I was about to reply when I felt something hard brush my leg. I looked down and saw Eric's thigh pressed against mine. It reminded me of the last time we…Only it was skin against skin that time. And then as if Eric could read my thoughts he replied…

"This is amazing!"

He clearly didn't notice his leg was pressed into me, even though I could feel tingling sensations through my outer and inner thigh, I looked back at him anxiously…

"Aint it though, nothing like a good bowl of jambalaya to make things right." Tara replied.

Jason had already inhaled his gumbo, working on his piece of cornbread now he took a huge swig of beer and nodded…

"Yeah, this stuff never get's old."

I took a bite of mine and felt the explosion of flavors in my mouth. Yes it truly was amazing, they were right. We got into a conversation about traditional Southern cuisine and how it was so much richer than other cultural dishes, well besides French food, although we had French influence so that probably explained why we liked our food so heavy. I didn't tell them about Eric cooking for me but we compared dishes and came to the consensus that yes, Southerners probably had a shorter life expectancy than the rest of the world in large part to our diets.

Speaking of rich food Eric offered me a bite of his pie after he finished the jambalaya.

"I don't know." I replied truthfully knowing Id probably gain 5 lbs after just one bite but Eric encouraged me…

"Hey, when is the next time you'll ever get to try deep fried cherry pie?"

"It's awesome." Jason encouraged me and I looked back at them feeling the pressure on, wondering if they had all talked to my Gran today and agreed to conspire against me. I finally took it from him and noted it looked just like one of those McDonalds things. I brought it up to my mouth feeling the warmth from the deep fryer and then I bit in.

_Oh my god._

It was like an orgasm wrapped up in a heart attack. My saliva swirled around the sweet yet mildly tart treat as I chewed and swallowed, noting the cherry filling was now oozing out I wiped my finger across the fritter and put it in my mouth.

"Not bad then?" Eric asked me with that smug smirk of his and I smiled and handed it back to him…

"Not bad." I confirmed and he took a bite to even it out. I was mesmerized by his mouth, the cherry filling oozing from his lips to the inside of the pie. It almost looked like blood and then he licked his lips clean and I suddenly wanted to attack him.

'_Wow.'_

"Okay y'all are making me hungry again." Tara replied.

"You want one?" Jason offered and Tara smirked and laughed…

"So now you're Mr. Charming?"

She shook her head and took one of the bags replying…

"Nah Ill just stick with good old Mr. Tom Thumb."

Jason helped himself to the other bag of donuts and teased Tara right back…

"Uh huh, I bet Tom's Thumb has been around the block."

Tara swatted his arm trying to act appalled and then I felt the warmth from Eric once more as he leaned in and pointed to his mouth…Did he want me to kiss him or something? I wondered, feeling nervous again. And then he replied….

"You've got some…Right there."

"What?"

I didn't know what he was referring to until he brought his hand up to my face, his forefinger bracing my chin gently as his thumb brushed away some excess cherry filling and then he licked his fingers.

_Oh just that? Of course, silly me_. Meanwhile, I think my bones had turned to spaghetti after watching him put his finger in his mouth.

I wondered how the fates could be so cruel to dangle someone like Eric right in front of my nose. It wasn't like he was interested in anything serious, it wasn't like I could expect more from him than something casual or that I shouldn't be surprised when the next supermodel strolled into town and swept him up away from me. Not to mention, it wasn't fun on my part to pretend like there was nothing going on between us, like this didn't mean anything to me. It felt like my mind and body were at war, like we had both mutually agreed to behave and remain friends, but I didn't really want that anymore, and I wasn't quite sure how I could pretend that I did. I realized then that, yes someone up there certainly hated me.

We decided to get up and walk off the 10 million calories we had just consumed and as promised Jason tried to win Tara a stuffed animal. Only the vendor was messing with him in a bad way. Tara gave the man a piece of her mind. It was entertaining watching them go back and forth, finally after about 10 minutes the vendor caved and gave Jason the big stuffed panther.

"Here." He replied with an awkward yet proud smile handing it to Tara and Tara took it from him reluctantly remarking quietly to me…

"No ones ever won anything for me before."

"Just say thank you." I advised her lowly and she nodded…

"Thank you Jason."

"Don't sweat it." He replied and scratched the back of his head, changing the subject he replied…

"So y'all want to hit some rides, the Tilt A' Whirl? Looks like it's got a short line."

I shook my head and quickly offered…

"No, Ill hold the panther, you guys go ahead."

I didn't want to admit it to them, although I was sure Jason knew, I didn't like amusement park rides. Anything that spun you around like the inside of a washing machine or tipped upside down on a track was unnatural.

"You sure Sook? Ill don't have to ride either…" Tara offered but I just shook my head.

"Eric?" Jason called back to his new BFF, but Eric shook his head too.

"Ill stay with Sookie."

Tara smiled at me and I shook my head, not wanting him to miss out because of me…

"No you can go, really, it's okay."

"It's fine, unless Tara and Jason want my lunch all over them that is, I need more time to digest." Eric smirked back at them and Tara shook her head…

"Have fun then, and don't get my panther dirty rollin around on the ground or anything." She winked back at me and I felt the color turn in my cheeks once more.

Daring to look at Eric after they had gone he simply smirked smugly and we walked along the board walk.

"Would you like me to win you something too?" He asked me and I scrunched up my nose…

"No, what does anyone ever do with these things anyway right? I was too old to be carrying around a stuffed animal anyway, and that's when I saw the photo booth."

"Come on." I took his hand and guided him over to it.

"What are you doing?"

"I've always wanted to get in one of these things." I replied with a smile. I fed in a few quarters and then pulled open the curtain. There was only one tiny little stool, of course I hadn't thought about the close proximity before I paid but I supposed that was the purpose of these things. The closer you were, the crazier the pictures. Great, let the torture commence and this time I couldn't get angry because I knew I started it.

So I let Eric take the stool since he was bigger, I set that massive panther on the floor and tried to crouch down but he pulled me onto his lap. I heard a beeper go off signaling that we only had a few seconds left before the flash. I felt Eric wrap his arm around my shoulder and I had no other choice but to put my arm around his neck, and we smiled for the camera. The first flash went off without a hitch. I was trying to think how to pose for the next one when I felt something wet touch my ear and realized Eric had stuck his tongue inside. I shrieked, realizing what he was doing, then the 2nd flash went off. I jumped on his lap, but his hands brought me back, only his fingers had found the ticklish spot under my arm and I collapsed into him my head supported against his neck, laughing as he attacked me with his hands, when another flash blinded our eyes.

We were both laughing now and I knew the photo session was most likely a bust trying to reach around to get him back, when he brushed his nose against my neck, and by extension, his lips.

I felt a shot of heat travel through my body and stop in between my thighs, my face falling and I looked back at him no longer finding it funny as the fourth flash signaled the end of our session. But neither of us got up to move.

I wondered again why it was we decided to take it slow, why I couldn't kiss him right now, because that's all I could think about doing. All those other feelings, the fear, the jealousy just melted away.

I leaned my head towards him, his hands had stopped and the air was heavy between us. I looked into his gaze for a moment weighed down suddenly by that yearning feeling, and that's when nature took over.

I moved my hand to the back of his neck, my fingers combing gently through his hair and leaned in. To hell with our deal, I didn't even remember what we had actually agreed upon at this point. My lips were mere centimeters from his, his breath hot against mine and my pulse quickened expectantly, begging to feel those lips again I closed my eyes and felt the sweet haze fall over me in paralyzed by his energy, when we heard someone rustling around outside the booth followed by a voice off in the distance…

"_Eve, Eve where are you?"_

We looked up and I closed my eyes, knowing reality was calling again. I was living in a dream world if I thought this was going somewhere.

"Guess someone else is waiting to use this." I replied quietly, slowly peeling myself away from Eric, but just as I sat up, a blonde girl of about age 9 or 10 peeked her head in, she was breathless from running…

"Well, hello." Eric replied with a smile trying to capture her attention with his charm. He most likely thought the girl had wandered away from her mother and was hiding in here like I did. She smiled back at him, but then her liquid blue eyes centered in on me and she handed me, a long rectangular piece of paper. It looked like an envelope at first.

I took it from her hesitantly and then unfolded the sheet of paper looked down at it realizing the photo's of Eric and me were inside.

"Oh thank you honey." I replied looking back at her.

She looked down at the panther at our feet and smirked back at us…

"You know that thing is going to take up a lot of room on your bed!"

I smiled and was about to tell her it wasn't mine and yes it would…

"But its not yours is it. (She closed her eyes for a minute touching the plush toy and concluded with a smirk…) Don't you just love babysitting?"

I looked back at her curiously, wondering how she knew that panther wasn't mine, lucky guess maybe?

_"Evelyn Marie St. Clair, get back here this instant, I won't keep Mrs. Belmont waiting!"_

"Is someone looking for you?" Eric asked her curiously his hand resting comfortably at my waist

She smiled nodded and replied quietly…

"She wants to fit me for one of those ugly dresses, you know the kind they make the girls have at finishing school, but I wont wear it, I'm supposed to go classes this summer, but I don't want to, she wants me to act like a little lady, but I'm not like those other girls and I never will be..."

I looked over at Eric this little girl pulling at my heart strings then I replied trying to take her feelings into consideration…

"Well maybe she just wants to make sure you are prepared when you turn into an adult, manners are very important you know."

She looked back at me awkwardly and then Eric continued…

"What if you negotiated with her, you go to finishing school and for every hour you spend there, you get to play or do whatever you want for the same amount of time."

She looked thoughtful for a minute as if she was considering it and I tried to encourage her…

"I think that sounds like a pretty good compromise." Wondering all of the sudden why this girl reminded me of me at her age.

Her face creased into a smile and she nodded her head, finding a new confidence she answered brightly…

"Yeah, I can compromise, I won't go to that stupid finishing school unless she lets me join the boys soccer team, the girls team sucks."

Eric chuckled and mumbled against my ear…

"_Sounds more like blackmail to me."_

I smiled, my lashes fluttering as his warm voice coated my skin and she looked back at us and nodded her head.

"Thanks, I wish my parents were like you."

_"Eve!!!"_

The voice outside sounded more distant but also more panicked and I advised her…

"You better go tell your mom you're okay, she's going to be worried about you."

But Eve simply smirked and leaned in to kiss Eric on the cheek and then me.

"Oh that old bat? She'll be fine, I'm sure she's more worried about causing a spectacle out there instead of finding her missing daughter. And congratulations by the way!"

"For wh…" But before I could get out the words she was off.

I looked back at Eric awkwardly and I remarked truthfully…

"Well that was odd."

He simply raised his brows and replied simply…

"Kids."

As if that was the only explanation we needed. I finally stood up, needing to stretch my legs, I grabbed the panther, and Eric took the pictures from me. As we left the photo booth he studied them, arching his brow in intrigue he remarked while we walked back towards the rides.

"I think I like this one best." He replied with a smirk pointing to the shot of me making a funny face as his large hands wrapped around me. I glanced over at it and shook my head thinking I looked ridiculous and answered…

"Yeah, you would like the one that shows the most cleavage."

He smirked and nodded his head. Of course neither of us dared to bring up the little kiss we almost just shared. What was the point? So, I changed the subject…

"So you think Tara and Jason are done on the Tilt A Whirl?"

I glanced back at Eric but he was looking off to the side and finally he replied…

"Yeah."

"Good, we can meet them."

Eric shook his head and he pointed over to a very long winding line, for the roller coaster and Tara and Jason were waiting at the rear.

I groaned knowing we'd be waiting here for hours with this damn panther, and Eric simply chuckled.

"Come on, I'm not that bad to be around am I?"

I looked back at him weakly and I shook my head.

"No, its not…"

"Oh my god, Eric Northman, is that you?" A woman's voice interrupted me from behind and we both turned around to face her.

She was young, attractive, with flaming red hair and dressed in Daisy Duke shorts and a plaid top tied at the waist with a white tank top underneath.

"Ginger." Eric replied with a smile and he leaned in to hug her.

"Everyone's asking about you? Wondering where you ran off to."

She looked back at me and Eric's eyes darted back from me to her nervously.

"I'm staying in Bon Temps now."

"This is Sookie, she's….she's a friend."

"Nice to meet you Sookie." She replied with crinkled eyes, putting her hand out to shake mine.

Well at least she was polite, I thought, shaking back reluctantly. But I couldn't say I liked her. If there ever was a time for feeling like the third wheel, now was the time while I wondered if she was another one of Eric's ex girlfriends.

"Yes nice to meet you too." I replied with fake sincerity. My Gran brought me up right after all.

Then she turned to Eric and proceeded to tell him about the bar. From the bits and pieces of their conversation, I figured Ginger must have worked for Eric at some point.

I started to turn away, thinking maybe I could find Jason and convince him to get out of line because this was uncomfortable enough, when Eric put his arm on my shoulder to stop me…

"Listen, I don't want to interrupt your…(she looked back at me as if fishing for a word finally deciding on…) evening, but, I just wanted to tell you how much everyone down there misses you, myself included…We're in your corner Eric."

She assured him. Eric's gaze flicked with mine for a minute and then he nodded his head and looked back at Ginger and replied…

"Thanks, I appreciate it."

She smiled faintly and finally concluded…

"Well I better get back, Bobby drives the car booth guy crazy. I just wanted to say hi."

I smiled politely and Eric replied…

"Take care Ginger."

"Yeah, I will, it was nice to see you, nice to meet you Sookie."

"Nice to meet you too." I replied my head still swimming. Finally Ginger left and Eric turned to me and I asked him curiously…

"Who was that?"

He turned to walk down the midway a few steps and then replied…

"She's just a friend, she works at the bar I own."

My eyes followed the trail Ginger made. Just a friend, like Pam is just a friend? I wondered silently, hoping she wasn't, but I was more curious about what Ginger meant when she said they were all behind him. Did she mean regarding Godric? However, before I could dedicate any more time to my thoughts Eric asked me…

"Do you want me to hold that?"

I looked down at the panther, forgetting I was even holding it.

"Sure I guess." I replied shrugging my shoulders.

"Good." He took the animal from me and then took my other hand in his free hand and replied…

"C'mon."

"Where are you going?" I asked him baffled. Tara and Jason were on the other side of the midway, but Eric kept walking and I could see where he was going before we even got there.

"Oh no. Eric, I'm not getting on that thing."

"It's not that bad, I promise. See, look how slow it's moving." He gestured to the top of the Ferris wheel but all I could think of was how high that was and how far it would be falling down.

I shook my head and Eric tried to coax me…

"I tell you what, if you get on it with me, we can do whatever you want after this…Remember what you told me about getting out of this town and trying new things? You don't want to live in the glass box forever do you?"

I creased my brows knowing what he meant by that. It was true, I had been a chicken today and it wasn't the first time. I looked up at it again and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm and center myself, I closed my eyes and finally replied."

"Okay."

Eric smiled and before I knew it, my feet were flying with him towards the huge ride.

I was so nervous once we got on the ride, but luckily there was enough room for all three of us. Eric, me, and the panther. I sat in the middle and Eric put his arm around me. Then it started to move and I gripped the metal bar for support.

"It's okay Sookie, nothing is going to happen, I promise."

Sadly, I felt no comfort from his words, more nervous now than ever, and he replied trying to help me out…

"Just close your eyes and think of your favorite place, a peaceful place."

I did as he suggested, but my eyes were shut tight and I couldn't quite channel the lake just now but I felt his arm move down to my waist and the warmth from his body flooded into mine.

"We're almost there, just past half way." He encouraged me and I dared to open my eyes. I saw the car below us shake and I panicked gripping the security bar with white knuckles.

"Oh god, we're going to fall!" I proclaimed in fear but Eric shook his head.

"No, we aren't." I could see the sun start to set over the tree tops and he told me…

"Just close your eyes and count to 10." I tried not to think how far up we were and I pressed my head against his chest thinking about his body wrapped around mine as we crunched on the pavement below and then Eric asked me out of the blue…

"Tell me what you want for your birthday."

"What?" I asked him confused and he repeated the question…

"You're birthday, tomorrow, Your Grandmother said we were going to the bowling alley to celebrate, she said it was tradition."

I looked back at him oddly, not even imagining that Eric would or should get me a gift and I replied shaking my head…

"You don't have to get me anything. Really, it's okay."

"Well I have to get you something, so unless you want me to hire a Mariachi band to sing you Happy Birthday, you might want to at least give me a hint."

I smirked, knowing he was kidding, well at least I hoped he was. I looked back at him thoughtfully, gripping him and the bar harder as we began to move, but also contemplating my Birthday wish and I blurted out…

"How about I cash in my rain check on that picnic date?"

Wondering if I just said that.

"A date huh?" He asked, his eyes bemused.

_Oh shit, I did_. I closed my eyes and quickly tried to back track.

"Well, I don't…I mean it's okay if you don't want to…"

I looked at him and then lowered my eyes unsure if that was appropriate or not, we did agree to take a break, and things were very unsettled between us, but to my dismay Eric finally replied with a smirk…

"I think that can be arranged."

I looked back at him in question, wondering if he was pulling my leg, but his blue eyes were warm and sincere and he made my heart swoon. I smiled in relief, a small thrill of excitement running through my veins, and then he asked me…

"We're still taking it slow right?"

Then I felt my stomach clench again as a ball of emotions churned up inside me. I knew I had to reign it back in before I made myself look like an even bigger idiot trying to think more with my rational mind. Yes slow was best, it was the smart way to do this, you couldn't have your cake and eat it too. I tried to convince myself and nodded hoping he couldn't read my thoughts because he was sure to think I was a lunatic. I took a deep breath and finally replied.

"Yeah, we can do that." I offered weakly, and then he smiled.

I smiled back at him faintly, for the first time today feeling like the clouds were starting to break, and then he pointed out past me. I followed his gaze, and was in awe by the beautiful sight before us. Downtown Shreveport was twinkling in the distance right in front of the most amazing sunset I had ever seen. The sky was full of reds and oranges and pinks, and you could see the first scattering of stars in the purple and blue hues beyond. It was so breath taking I didn't even realize we were at the top already.


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: **Yep, it's another long one, hopefully that doesn't turn anyone away. I think we can get back to the usual length in the next chapter. But there was alot I wanted to cram into this one. Hehe, so yeah it's pretty self explanatory. Those of you who are on an angst lite diet, will most likely enjoy this chapter and those of you angst addicts like me, dont worry, its coming. ;) So that's it I guess. Hope you enjoy it and thanks to everyone for the awesome reviews. You make my week! xoxo

**Chapter 16-Twenty Eight**

I woke up the next morning, my birthday morning to an empty house. I couldn't help but feel mildly disappointed. My Gran of course had left me a card on the table, and I knew she had gone to help with the Church bake sale, but I wondered where everyone else had gone, namely Eric, because his car was missing from the driveway.

It had been such a long time since I had had so much fun, even though to anyone else yesterday would have been an average day.

We got home last night and my Gran was watching Pam's Lost season 2 DVD's with her. They were wrapped up in it and I was pardon the term, so Lost, and I couldn't make sense of much, not to mention I was confused about what I was or should be feeling about this upcoming date with Eric. He didn't say much on the car ride home, and for some reason I felt like we were back where we started when we left the house. I had no idea what to think. Was he having second thoughts? I didn't want him to feel obligated to go on a date with me just because it was my Birthday. I wasn't that pathetic. So I was stuck on 'freaking out nervous' because I had no idea what this meant. With the mass confusion spinning around in my head making me dizzy, I decided to just go to bed and call it a night hoping things would make better sense after a full night sleep.

Unfortunately it didn't, nor was I expecting everyone to be gone when I found myself standing alone in the kitchen this morning either. Twenty Eight didn't feel much different than twenty seven, I realized thinking about how yesterday morning wasn't much better.

I opened up the note from my Gran and it read…

_"Happy Birthday My sweet Baby girl! I left an extra plate of pecan bars for you by the sink, help yourself, see you at noon, you know where, with your bowling shoes on!_

_P.S. Don't worry about bringing anything besides your beautiful self, we have it covered. –Love Gran"_

I wondered who she meant by "we" and then looked up and saw the plate of bars remembering what I had to eat yesterday, yeah that so wasn't going to happen right now. Maybe I could have some later today, after I had lost all my will power from festering in my own mania.

I turned around to search the fridge for my low calorie standby, grapefruit when I heard Jason's voice from behind.

"Hey Sook!"

"Hi Jason." I replied waving at him from behind. I heard him munching on something and I asked him while rummaging through the fridge …

"So did you get Tara home okay last night?" She was a little lopsided after a few spins on the rollercoaster I replied taking out the milk.

"Ah yeah, she got home just fine."

"That's great, I know she liked the panther you won for her."

"She did, she told you that?" He asked me as if he doubted it.

I made a silent pact to myself that I would never meddle in Jason's love life. With his history and mine combined, I figured it was best to operate by the golden rule, don't throw stones when you both live in glass houses, so I politely concluded…

"Yes, more or less."

I finally found the grapefruit, it was in the bottom drawer in the very back, I turned around to face a smirking Jason, only to find half the plate of pecan bars gone, and my face fell in disappointment.

"Geez Jason, sometimes I think you don't eat anything until you come over here."

Jason flipped his eyes up and he swiped one more bar before I pulled the plate away.

"And miss out on Gran's pecan bars?"

"You could go support the bake sale, you know for charity, at church!"

"No thanks, I aint that desperate."

I looked back at him trying to keep my cool, he hadn't even said anything about my birthday and was eating the plate of bars Gran had left me. So I took the advice I know Gran would have given me had she been here. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all. I went to find a knife for my grapefruit, placing it on the cutting board and as Jason went up to the fridge to grab a glass of milk for himself too he asked me…

"Speaking of church what ever happened to choir boy?"

I couldn't pretend to not know who he was referring to—Bill, who was a big supporter of our local church, member wise, volunteer wise, charity wise, and he also happened to be in the church choir. No wonder I skipped last Sunday, I thought.

I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth wondering if my brother possessed the tact of a tsetse fly really not wanting to get into this right now. Jason had a small picture about what went down before, and I had no idea why he was bringing this up now, chopping my grapefruit in half roughly, I replied sharply…

"I have no idea."

"Coward!" He answered gruffly and I looked back at him in question wondering if I heard him right…

"Excuse me?"

"The fucker is a coward, never came back to face the music."

I frowned, that ball of pain resonating in me as I recalled the whole sordid debacle and Jason concluded…

"I'm glad you aint with him any more, he was no good for you."

I wondered if he even knew what he was talking about, but I rarely saw my brother act protectively over me and I didn't really know what to say. It's nice to see you really care about me? I realized quickly that we desperately needed a subject change, trying to think of something else, all I could come up with was…

"So you and Dawn...I haven't seen you with her for a couple months..."

I know it was taboo, but Jason and I didn't talk about much, Dawn was the only thing I could think of on the fly.

"Yeah I think me and Dawn are done."

He swiped another bar, but I didn't say anything this time. I thought he deserved that one.

"I'm sorry Jason." I replied softly turning to face him, but he just replied…

"It's for the best, I'm pretty sure she was cheatin on me."

I frowned thinking if anyone was likely to Tom Cat around, it was Jason, but he shook his head and replied…

"Yeah, I know, I like to look, I won't deny that, but when I was with her, I didn't mess around, well there was that one time I made out with Jenny, but I was drunk and well…She was pickin fights with me towards the end, I think she was screwin around with some other guy."

"I'm sorry Sweetie."

I put my hand on his arm in empathy but couldn't help but wonder if it was a Stackhouse thing to never be truly happy with what we had, that's how things ended between me and Bill too, which made me feel guilty, because no matter how hard you tried to spin it, I was the one who cheated on him first. It made me wonder if someone like me really deserved a 2nd chance.

"Looks like my baby sister's growing up, broke up with her first boyfriend (he smirked and patted my shoulder as if he was proud) We both have ex's now! So, how are you holding up?"

He remarked and I looked at him, strangely, not really thinking about Bill as an ex. But I guess he was. It was almost surreal for me to be having this conversation with Jason. As I said, we weren't that big on talking before. There wasn't much of a choice other than to just go with it.

When I thought of Bill, it felt strange, this sensation, I could only say it felt like a pressure lifting inside me, followed by a melancholy haze. We hadn't exactly said it out loud, but in that moment, I knew it was true, we were finished.

"It's weird (I replied truthfully, explaining…) But also relieving, and scary in a way."

Jason smirked and he replied as someone who had ample experience…

"Yeah, it will get better, trust me."

And for some reason I hoped he was right.

"I'm glad you aren't with her anymore too, you deserve better." I concluded, thankful to have Jason's support.

Jason smiled, and added…

"So do you."

I looked back at him awkwardly, these moments between us were very rare and I wasn't sure how to react, but Jason surprised me by leaning in and hugging me and he finally concluded…

"Anyway, who cares about them, they can go both fuck themselves, or each other. I just hope you have a good Birthday Sook!"

I was so startled by Jason's words, I actually laughed.

xxxxxxxx

After laying out in the sun, I decided to go in and get dressed. I decided on my short shorts and short sleeved peasant top, I still held onto a shred of hope that someone would be home soon, but it had been dead quiet ever since Jason left. He had to run some errands, I suspected he realized he needed to get me a last minute birthday gift and probably another case of beer for his fridge, since Gran was out.

But it didn't make the loneliness go away. I had gone through an array of emotions by the time 11:45 rolled around. I wondered where Eric was, if I should call him, was Pam even coming? Did they forget? I knew my Gran wouldn't, nor would Jason, they were obligated by law and blood to be there, but it didn't sit right with me. Especially considering the rockiness of Eric's and my relationship. I wondered if this would be a Birthday for the books, maybe Id finally drink myself into that coma. I had been pretty modest up until then, even on my 21st birthday, I only had one glass of wine.

I sighed, told myself to just suck it up. Gran and Jason were what mattered to me, and I got into my car with a spare pair of socks to wear with my bowling shoes. I was going to have fun god dammit, whether Eric was there or not.

I arrived at the alley, and didn't see any of the usual cars in the parking lot, thinking just great. Now I get to sit here and wait for them, alone. How depressing!

I got out of my car and began to walk towards the door when I heard a familiar voice from behind…

"So where is lover boy?" I turned around to face my tormenter, it was Pam of course, rolling my eyes, frustrated because I had no idea where Eric was I replied sharply…

"You tell me."

Pam smirked her tall heels clicking along side me as I walked up to the door in flip flops and she replied…

"Ah, so he's in the doghouse then?"

"I don't know, I haven't seen him all morning."

Luckily Pam was wise enough to know when to back off and she just replied sincerely…

"I'm sure he'll be here soon."

I shook my head thinking back to all the reasons why we might not work out in my head, and this was one. Eric was terrible at communication, not to mention, I was slightly worried that something had happened, to either him or maybe his uncle, not that Id ever admit it.

"Don't worry darling! If there's anything Eric is good for, it's his word, plus he's got plenty of reasons to celebrate today." I looked back at Pam in question and she nodded in assurance refusing to elaborate any more she held the door open for me.

Pam apparently had ordered the party room, I saw her instructing some man on last minute details with the banner that read my name, while I was getting our shoes at the counter. My Gran knew I didn't like to make a big fuss and never reserved that room. So I tried my best to be polite and gracious when she gave me the grand tour.

Jason came in next, with Tara by his side. They had the food, Tara was holding 3 pizza boxes while Jason had the soda, cups, and plates. So that explained where he was.

After we got our shoes on and decided to warm up, my Gran arrived apologizing because she couldn't shake Maxine Fortenberry at the bake sale. I looked back behind her, but frowned realizing, he wasn't coming.

"I don't know why they insist on making these things look like clown shoes." Pam remarked and Jason smirked and moved over to sit by her…

"Here, do you want me to help you?"

He was clearly trying to flirt with her but Pam simply replied…

"No honey, I think I can tie my own shoe laces, but thanks anyway."

Tara rolled her eyes and as our lane was fired up, my Gran called over to me once we had gathered around our lane…

"Okay, Birthday girl, you get the first swing." She lifted a black 10lb ball and offered it to me with a big grin.

I smiled faintly and took the bowling ball from her. I knew she would help me get my mind off other things, although I couldn't help but admit, terrible things were going through my head at this moment. I pictured Eric lying somewhere in a ditch. I took one more look behind me towards the door and then figured, I had to just suck it up and shake my dark thoughts away, there was no use worrying when I didn't even know what I was worrying about.

I walked up to the bowling floor slowly and concentrated on my target. After a few deep breaths, I made my stance and took my aim.

I was a pretty decent bowler actually, not the best, but not the worst, and as I rolled the ball, I knocked down 7 pins.

They all cheered from behind, a little more loud than necessary, but thankfully we were the only people here at the moment and my Gran replied…

"Okay, one more turn, sink em Sugar plum!"

I couldn't help but smirk that time. My Gran's competitiveness was cute and hardly threatening, but she knew how to cheer me up. I gave it everything I got watching the ball roll down the lane and it hit one, unfortunately the other one was on the opposite end, but it was wobbling and I held my breath as we waited for the outcome. Finally it toppled down leaving one lone pin standing, and the crowd cheered wildly from behind.

"She set the bar high kids, now we have our work cut out for us."

I smiled and came back down into the seating area, watching Jason take the first swing in challenge, and just as I was about to sit down, I saw Eric come in with a big box in his hands. My body instantly reacted to him, pulling my eyes towards him as if we were two long lost magnets, and I found myself holding my breath unable to look away as he approached. He smiled at me softly and my stomach flipped and then other people noticed him, and he announced.

"Sorry, I'm late, they were short staffed at the bakery counter and were just finishing the cake up when I got there."

"No worries sugar, we're all just glad your here." My Gran smiled and gestured for him to come and join us.

I tried to hide the relief that had come over me, exhaling in necessity because he was the kind of person that made you forget to breathe, and those damn butterflies again, I met his blue gaze, which had some sort of pull on me. I saw Pam smile smugly over at me and I knew what she was thinking. Silly Sookie. The realization hit that there was in fact nothing wrong and I had been putting my mind through hell just because he was standing in line at the damn bakery. I swallowed, the anger now simmering and I turned away from him to take my seat stubbornly.

"Now it's a real party!" Tara replied cheerfully. I tried not to roll my eyes behind her back, and folded my arms while Eric set his box on the table behind and came down to join us.

"Hey, now that we have an even number of people, why don't we make teams?" Tara suggested to what I could only assume was a way to pair me and Eric up. I wasn't amused though. Pam looked back at me and Eric sat down on the other side of me causing my skin to spark like fireworks.

"Sorry, I'm late." He whispered and cast me a smile. I looked back at him and replied sharply, my anger level on boil now that he had made me worry so unnecessarily since he was seemingly perfectly fine, waiting in line at the bakery counter since 9am this morning!...

"Yeah, you already said that."

He gave me a funny look, and then Pam replied...

"Well Ill be the first to admit, I'm not very good at this, so whoever gets me, might want me to go last."

I nodded my head and replied…

"Yes, how about boys against girls, Gran you can be on Jason's team since he's virtually unbeatable. Ill play with Pam and Tara."

I tried not to look at Eric as Gran agreed to my terms…

"Yes that sounds like a great idea, Eric are you up for a little friendly competition?"

Through my peripheral vision I noticed his eyes never left me, save for one brief moment when he glanced back at my Gran and replied with a nod...

"Yeah, sure, I think we can take the girls to the cleaners."

He smirked and it only made me more frustrated. So when my turn came up again, I gave him hell. Pam wasn't kidding though, she sucked. But fortunately, my Gran's game wasn't what it used to be, so it was between Jason, Eric, Tara, and me to determine the outcome.

Tara and I were in the lead in the final set and Eric was the last swinger for the boys team. If he didn't get 10 pins, they would lose this round. I watched his tall body as he walked up to the bowling floor, grabbed his 15lb ball and executed it with such force I thought the bowling pins would be crushed into splinters before the ball got through them all. But lucky for him, he scored a perfect strike. Despite my anger, I couldn't help but admire his graceful and perfectly muscled form. My thoughts turned as the others conversed and I found myself imagining sinful things while trapped under him, my body reacting to those fantasies. But I was distracted by Gran and Jason's cheering, and when I looked up at the score board and realized we were tied.

I groaned.

My Gran took one look at me and she replied...

"Well we can do one more round or call it a draw." She raised her brows and looked back from me to Eric in question, since we were the teams strongest players and Eric replied with a nod to me...

"I'm good, I wouldn't mind if we tied and called it a draw."

I looked back into his gaze spellbound for a moment, but then he smiled at me again and I remembered I had to stay strong, I was still mad at him, the fighter in me came out and I concluded...

"One more round to break the tie."

My Gran smirked and she looked back at Eric replying...

"Looks like the Birthday girl calls the shots cowboy."

Eric nodded in acceptance his eyes filled with intrigue as he stepped aside off the bowling floor putting his arm out in graciousness and finally he replied...

"Ladies first then."

I looked back at Tara, but we both knew I was the stronger player and finally I stepped past him with head held high, grabbed my ball, and made the move. My game was on this afternoon, and as the sweat condensed on my forehead, I felt the ball leave my hands followed by the sharp crack of the ball hitting the floor. It was almost perfectly centered in the lane and as it rolled on, it smashed into the #1 pin, and the rest followed from behind. I jumped up in the air when I saw all 10 were down and cheered to myself. Tara and Pam hollering and wooting from behind. And then I stepped aside and gave Eric the same gesture he gave me, my hand pointing towards his bowling ball, I replied...

"The floor is all yours."

"Thank you." He smirked and, then I watched him with held breath.

I saw a slight twitch in his leg as he launched the ball, his first swing taking out 4. Then he prepared to swing again. My hand clasped the side of the chair watching it roll all the way down the alley to its final destination, and as it veered off to the side it took out 2 pins and then fell into the gutter.

"Aw, dammit!" Jason proclaimed frustrated and I looked back at Eric in question, wondering if he just did that on purpose. But before I could say anything Pam and Tara attacked me with hugs and cheers...

"Girls rule and boys drool!" Tara proclaimed with a smirk. Finally they let me go and he came up to me, his large body towering over me, he took my hand and kissed the top, replying...

"It was a pleasure to have been beaten by you."

What did he just say? I couldn't hear anything over the ringing in my ears and pounding in my chest. My eyes fixated over the spot on my hand that his lips and light stubble just brushed which had now caused a strange buzzing sensation.

Quickly I pulled my hand away not wanting the others to see. I wasn't some girl that could be won over by a hot guy and a few smooth moves after all.

I wasn't smiling still questioning what just happened, my defenses weakening, when my Gran put her hand on my shoulder and replied..

"Congratulations baby girl!" She hugged me.

"Thanks Gran."

"Yeah, great job!" Jason added coming up to hug me briefly. And then he announced...

"Okay, I don't know about y'all but I could use some cake!"

We had plowed through the pizza during the game.

Gran wanted me to open my presents first though and we took everything back to the party room. Pam had some kind of disco ball set up with the red and blue lights and then she picked a song on the juke box.

'Pretty Woman, by Roy Orbison.'

"You don't have to go to all this extra trouble." I explained to her as she was setting out the gifts, but she simply shook her head and replied...

"It's no trouble."

"Open mine first!" Jason proclaimed excitedly and pointed to his roughly wrapped gift on the floor. I bent over to lift and nearly choked when I realized how heavy it was. I asked him jokingly...

"What's in here? A lead weight?"

But he simply smiled and shook his head. I looked back at him hesitantly and then pulled the wrapping away from the box. I could see the contents revealed inside.

"A pink bowling ball?"

"Yeah, cause you're so good at it figured you'd want your own ball."

I looked up at him awkwardly, because it was obvious he was very proud of his gift and the apparent thoughtfulness of it, seeing the warning glance my Gran cast me and I quickly smiled set it aside and remarked with mock enthusiasm…

"Yes, it really is…so pink! Thank you Jason!"

I hugged him, figuring it was the thought that counts even though I was sure this baby would wind up collecting dust in my closet till next year. And then Pam brought me the next gift from her. I opened the card first. It was very sweet, and then I opened her gift. Lost, season one DVD set.

"I figured you could get caught up, then you can watch with us."

"Thanks Pam." I smiled reaching over to hug her before turning the small box over, and she noted…

"My favorite character is Sawyer, after season one, you'll know why. I don't think Eric has seen season one either have you honey?" She winked at me and then looked at Eric as he shook his head casting me an awkward glance as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. My face colored, but I barely had time to process any of it when Tara barged in with her gift.

"Here, now open mine." She insisted.

I tore at the dark colored paper and inside there were about 6 copies of various Romance novels.

"I figured now that its summer you can catch up on your reading, when you aint catching up on other things!" Tara smirked and I looked at her for a minute and then she glanced at Eric too, and then it clicked for me as to what she was implying and my face went from pink to red, not wanting to draw more attention to the purple elephant in the room. I wondered if Pam and Tara were tag teaming now, I wouldn't put it past them.

My voice frogged up and I cleared my throat and hugged her briefly, very briefly…

"Thank you Tara! That was very ThoughtFULL." Although the last syllables of that sentence were a little sharp in warning, Tara just smiled smugly and nodded her head.

"No problem sugar."

"Now it's my turn!" My Gran smiled and handed me a very large box. I was just relieved no one else seemed to catch on to Pam or Tara's implications.

Then I turned my attentions to the package she handed me. I wondered how she got this in, but then figured Jason must have dropped it off earlier with his. I looked back at her curiously and she just gestured for me to get opening.

"I'm not getting any younger."

I smirked, taking the card out, it was a very sentimental card, not really wanting to share it with everyone else, I mouthed a thank you to her and then, I got to tearing. I had no idea what it was once the paper was off because the box underneath was for an old space heater. And I was sure she wasn't getting me one of those for the summer, so I ripped off the tape and opened up the first flap. My eyes were mesmerized by the kaleidoscope of blues purples and greens, and I pulled the fabric out of the box and the contents inside were finally revealed.

"Oh my God! Gran!"

It was a quilt, the most beautiful quilt I had ever seen. She was somehow able to make each square appear like a portion of a flower, I imagined it to be a bouquet of violets and she smiled, but I couldn't take my eyes off it. It was so beautiful.

"Wow, Adele that is fabulous!" Tara marveled and Pam admired it too. I think I even heard Eric mumble something. I carefully folded it up over my chair and threw my arms around her wanting her to know how special that was to me. I knew how much work those things took, and I hadn't even known so she had to have done it on the sly.

"Thank you Gran, I love it!"

"I'm so glad." She mused and patted my hair softly. After a long moment my Gran finally let go and then she nodded gesturing to look behind me.

"I think you still have one more gift Baby girl!"

I looked over my shoulder and saw Eric standing there. I met his gaze curiously because I thought we had already talked about his gift, he was taking me out on our picnic date tonight, that was if he still wanted to. But he was clutching a small bag in his hands. I smiled faintly, the bitter feelings from before fading away causing my heart to flutter as he made his peace offering and I took it from him hesitantly.

"Go on, open it, so we can get to the cake." Jason replied from the back. I flipped my eyes trying to ignore him and then took out the card from inside. He had written my name on the front and I put my hand over it, flipping the envelope over, he hadn't sealed it and I lifted the flap from the pocket. It read…

"_I know you didn't want anything, but I thought since you don't have a real one you could use this. And if anything ever happens, anything at all, I've got my number on speed dial._

_I hope you have a very Happy Birthday Sookie! _

_p.s. Looking forward to part 2 later!_

_-E"_

I looked back at Eric strangely wondering what it was, some sort of phone perhaps. My stomach churned in anticipation, and then I opened the bag, pulling red tissue paper out and inside the box was the most beautiful red shiny iPhone.

Oh my!

"Wow, is that one of those iPod things?" Jason asked from the back and I looked up at Eric stunned. This was too much. I had no idea how much these things cost, but I knew they were expensive.

"Yeah, it's called an iPhone." Tara replied and she looked back from Eric to me smugly.

"The service is paid for as long as you choose to use it." He explained as if I needed an explanation and I just stared at him with my mouth slightly ajar.

"I think that's the most beautiful phone I've ever seen, I never knew phones could be pretty." My Gran mused.

Pam just sat there with her cat that ate the canary look, one brow raised as her eyes darted back from Eric to me.

It took a moment for me to register his words. _'If anything ever happens, anything at all, I'm on speed dial.'_

Did that mean he…

"Honey, I think that gift deserves a big hug." My Gran insisted.

What? I was still lost in my own thoughts as I looked at everyone watching me expectantly my gaze finally falling on Eric.

I looked back at Eric cautiously my head still spinning, but now the butterflies were doing somersaults in my stomach too.

"Damn, that is some phone, can I take a look when you're done?" Tara asked creeping in from behind me to gaze at the beautiful shiny red device. I looked back at Eric still in shock, and he met my gaze with a half smile.

"Sookie." I heard my Gran coax me from behind and finally I snapped out of it long enough to remember my manners. I stepped forward towards Eric. Thankfully he met me half way and I awkwardly put my arms around his middle. I felt his arms enclose around me and I realized it was the first time we had been close like this in public, in front of my family and friends. I felt him pull me towards his large frame then I relaxed finding that familiar comfort and security from his embrace.

"Thank you." I replied softly as my nose took in his scent. I couldn't help but notice my body reacting once more in torturous yearning.

"You're welcome." He answered holding for just a moment longer than necessary and then he let me go.

I didn't know how to respond. Aside from the ring Bill gave me, no other man had ever given me such an extravagant gift before. What did it mean? I kept asking myself, but the answers never came.

Instead we finished out the afternoon with birthday cake and dancing to 60's music on the juke box. I would have never admitted it, but the party room was a nice idea, and this birthday was definitely one I would remember, happy to say, in a good way.

We left and everyone went their separate ways. Gran had to go back to church to help out with the bake sale cash count, Pam had a date with someone in Shreveport. Tara had to work, and Jason, well he did whatever it was he did. So that just left me and Eric back alone at the house to dance around the heaping pile of awkwardness between us. I thanked him for my phone again and he showed me how to program it. I was amazed at everything one little phone could do.

It was rare that I had a full day off to just kick back and I convinced him to watch a couple episodes from the first Lost DVD with me. I needed time to digest this day, along with the food that we ate. We ended up watching through to the 5th episode. I actually liked Jack and Hurley best despite what Pam said about Sawyer. He was a little too salty for my tastes. But maybe he'd come around, he seemed to carry a big chip on his shoulder about something. Eric didn't really care about any of that, he just wanted to know why there were polar bears on an island in the South Pacific.

Finally when we could no longer feel our limbs after hanging out like couch potatoes for so long, Eric got up and announced.

"Okay, Ill get the food packed, and you do whatever it is you need to do."

I looked back at him in question and then I realized he meant the date, my pulse began to race…

"You mean, you want to do the picnic tonight?"

He replied…"Well you have to work most of next week don't you?"

I guess he had a point and I looked back at him nervously, the butterflies in my stomach returning. Yes that was happening a lot today. We seemed to have mastered the friends thing, but could we handle anything more without it backfiring? I wasn't very confident about that because I didn't trust myself around him.

"Okay, give me 30 minutes." I heard myself reply, knowing Id need more than that if I wanted to look really good, but I didn't want to seem high maintenance.

Eric just smirked and headed into the kitchen.

About 3 different outfits, 4 hairdo's and two pairs of shoes later, I had finally decided on an ensemble. I didn't want to be too dressy because there was a good chance we'd be sitting on the ground, but I wanted to look cute too, so I opted for my red and pink floral patterned sun dress with a jean jacket over it because it was dark now. And chose my only pair of red heels thinking they made my legs stretch for miles and I would need that extra height with Eric. I swept my hair up halfway and finished off with some rosy pink lip gloss.

When I rounded the corner my heart nearly stopped in my chest. He was standing there in a tight fitting red and navy plaid shirt that hugged his shoulders, slim torso and dark jeans which hung comfortably on his hips accentuating my favorite part of his anatomy. My sexual libido went into overdrive.

He turned around to face me as I descended the stairs and his face fell. I smiled softly and he breathed once I reached the bottom…

"You look amazing."

"So do you." I replied, wondering to myself how we were going to get through tonight. If something as simple as a wardrobe change could have me practically pouncing him.

He picked up a basket, which smelled amazing and asked me if I was ready. I nodded my head meeting his gaze in nervous excitement.

xxxxxxx

In his car he took his time driving and I began to subconsciously drum my fingers on the passenger door interior. Eric looked at me strangely and he asked me in what I could only guess was to get my attention off my anxiety...

"So, did you get everything you wanted for your birthday?"

I looked back at him in question, his deep blue eyes illuminated by the moonlight and I put my hand on my churning stomach, answering truthfully...

"I didn't really want anything, just having everyone together would have been enough."

Eric smirked and he replied...

"No that's the well rehearsed morally correct answer. You wanted something more, I could tell."

I looked back at him, in mock outrage because he was being incredibly presumptuous and I replied...

"You could tell? How could you tell? You weren't even there for the first part, nor did I even see you leave this morning."

He looked back at me, his voice pausing for a moment before he spoke, and finally he explained...

"I was in Shreveport with my uncle, and then I had to take care of some business. I tried to call, but you most likely were out pruning up in that sun because no one answered."

I wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of knowing he nailed me and I asked him instead….

"So how is Fintan?"

"He's good, he ask's about you now."

"Oh? (I paused for a moment, his silence killing me and finally I caved and asked…)And what did he say?"

Eric paused for a moment, his lip twitching and he replied...

"He wants to know when I'm going to pop the question to you."

I nearly choked out a gasp and looked back at Eric my cheeks blushing and Eric explained...

"Don't worry, I told him I better make sure I can get through one date first."

I laughed uncomfortably and then looked back at him my heart racing all over my chest as I bit my lip as I imagined Fintan saying that to Eric. His gaze grew serious for a moment and then he concluded...

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you where I was."

"It's okay." I replied not wanting to dwell on it, figuring that had to be part of his reason for the cell phone too. I smiled faintly to myself because in all honesty, it was sweet of him.

He drove on, I had no idea where we were going. I didn't recognize this area and we sat there in silence for a few moments and then finally I remarked, partially fishing, partially because I was a sadistic fool...

"You didn't have to do this you know, I mean I'm sure you're busy the rest of the week, you could still take tonight off if you needed to get more important things done."

I hesitated wondering if I just put my foot in my mouth again. We pulled into a long dirt road and Eric looked back at me for a moment with creased brows...

"Do what? Go on a date with you?"

There it was, yes I officially ruined our date before it even started, I thought. I wondered when I had turned into such an expert saboteur. Wanting to mentally kick myself I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes, wondering if there was any other way I could make this night worse. Maybe insult his mother or something else equally important to him?

"Sookie, I've wanted to do this since the first day we met, you are important to me."

I opened my eyes and looked at him in dismay, and he confessed in earnest, looking back from the road to me.

"Why would you think I wouldn't want to go on a date with you? I asked you first, we just got sidetracked before, and its not like that night ended that badly either."

Relief flew through my veins. I wondered at what point I had turned into such a moody neurotic koo koo head, because he was right, he did ask first, but so much had happened, my body and my mind had been so out of whack lately, I didn't know what was real or what was not. But apparently this was real which both scared and excited me at the same time. I didn't know what to do or how to react, but apparently we were here. I tried to keep my tempestuous emotions under control when he asked me if this is what I wanted.

"Are you having second thoughts?"

I shook my head, replying quietly, feeling slightly embarrassed now...

"No…no never."

He put his hand over mine and I felt that hurricane of emotions spin through me. There was something more going on here, I knew that now. I felt different, like when he touched my hand he wasn't just touching my skin, he was touching my center.

"Good, because it's just a picnic, I mean you have to eat right?"

But in truth I didn't even hear his words because my heart was so busy jack hammering nervously in my chest.

Finally we stopped and I looked out the window. I couldn't see much but through the brush, I thought I spotted a little lagoon veiled by willow trees and spanish moss covered oaks.

"We're here." He announced, and I looked out attempting to ignore the notably more rapid speed of my pulse rate and my bodies natural endorphins screaming out to me to stop spazzing out.

I tried desperately to get back into the mindset of friends for both our sakes, at least that was familiar to me and I would be less likely to shove my foot in my mouth again, Eric smiled and kissed my cheek.

"C'mon." He smiled trying to coax me out of my stupor.

The sparks lit my body up from the outside in and then he got out and came around to my side to open the door for me. My heart was thumping so fast in my chest I wondered if it might fly out and when his hand took mine, I felt the electric shock light up my body like a live wire.

My body was no longer under my control and as he helped me up, I paused for a moment, my hand placed on the door as I closed it behind me and then I looked up at him. I was right, the heels did kick me up a few inches, he was still very tall, his body towering over mine, but I could see more clearly into those deep blue eyes and he reeled me in. I smiled weakly wondering how I could get through this because I felt like a bomb was about to go off inside me. We both heard a bird cry in the night, Eric looked up into the dark night sky to track its flight over our heads, and that's when I felt the bomb go off. I put both my hands on either side of his face and pulled him back towards me crashing my lips against his in a mind blowing, explosive, pulse racing kind of kiss. The picnic basket falling to it's side at our feet as he brought his hands up to grip my shoulders...

I was so dizzy, so bewitched by him, I couldn't tell you what time of day it was let alone where we were in the world at that moment. But then I wondered if it was the wrong move. I didn't want to screw up again. And so I pulled back, breathless, lips swollen and looked back at him with creased brows...

"I'm sorry...I, hope that wasn't wrong…"

I met his gaze, his dark eyes lucid and devouring me within an inch of my life, and then to my surprise, he pulled me back to him and smashed his lips over mine hungrily devouring me whole. I felt the whoosh in my chest as he pulled me back into his arm and pushed me back against the car.

It was frantic and urgent, as if we both needed the other like oxygen.

"Too fast?" He asked, his lips flushed for a moment before they joined mine once more. He inhaled my mouth and I weaved my fingers through his hair, clenching his shirt from behind and then running my palm flat across his abs as I felt his hungry arousal press into my leg and I moaned...

"No, too slow."

Eric smiled and he picked me up in his arms setting me down on the hood of his corvette as his lips continued to attack me as mine were attacking his. I found my hand rising up to tug at the hem of his shirt, needing to feel flesh against flesh, I straddled his hips as he ground his hardness into my cotton panties and I began to unbutton his shirt. I wanted him now. There was no more time for talking, no more time for friendship, this was raw, and real, and the connection could no longer be denied.

His tongue dove into my mouth and I slid mine against his as he helped me shrug off my jacket and then his hand slid up my thigh. I was already so so wet, I wanted him to touch me everywhere.

I fumbled with the buttons on his shirt and he looked back at me in hesitation for a moment but, I was done thinking. This is what I wanted. My heart, my soul, my body, finally were all in agreement.

He was so beautiful, all I wanted to do was run my hands across his smooth abs, his hard pecs, the sweet soft trail of dark blonde hair that led down to the thick desire bulging through his pants.

He tugged my sundress off over my head tousling my hair and I felt the cool air followed by his warm hands arouse my nipples. I dove my hand into his pants and he pulled my pelvis closer to him and then I began to pump him up and down. He was as hard as granite. Eric's mouth was all over me, my lips, my jaw, my neck, as his hands held my naked throbbing breasts.

I fumbled with his fly, unbuttoning with one hand while my other hand continued to stroke him. He gasped and then plunged his hot tongue over my aching right peak.

I felt possessed, like we were wild and the only two people on earth at that moment, like Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. I tugged down his pants happy to see he had gone sans underwear. The wetness inside me began to flow freely lubricating my tight folds and then I felt his hands grab each side of my cotton panties and tear them down one leg at a time, unleashing the glaze from within.

I pulled his mouth up to kiss mine as he pushed me back pinning me against him and the hood of his car. I wrapped my legs around his naked ass, my heels rubbing against his flesh and I opened myself to him. We were definitely way past foreplay and skipping right to hot and heavy, but my mind didn't care, we needed each other too much.

"Kiss me." I whispered and he leaned forward. I could feel his hard arousal touch my hot sheath.

Eric did as I asked and in one fluid movement he was inside me. The aching pressure was almost too much to bear and I felt my muscles spasm around him, but then he pushed in further and I stilled myself for him.

"Sookie…" He whispered my name while he pumped into me. I brought my hands up to rest on his neck, my fingers now buried in his hair clenching him tightly.

"min älskade!" He mumbled into my neck when I turned my head and my lips caught his.

"Say it again?' I asked him, not even knowing what he was saying, but it was beautiful to me.

"Min älskade!"

My body began to shudder under his and I wrapped my legs and balmy thighs around his naked hips more securely as he rode me harder and faster. It felt so amazing I nearly lost consciousness, having to bite my lip from falling over the edge too soon.

"Eric!" I gasped wanting to give back to him just as good as I got, I squeezed tighter, both of us riding the tidal wave to the end of the world.

"Oh Jesus, mother, fuck!" He groaned, and his intense blue eyes locked in on mine. In that moment, I felt our souls unite as my eyes widened and the threshold finally gave way, his milky white fluid filling me up inside while the world outside fell into a blinding white light.

My heart was full, so full it hurt and I wanted to give him some of that fullness back.

"I…I…" It was on the tip of my tongue, but I could not yet muster the words, or form a coherent sentence for that matter. I felt his lips take mine as we slowly floated back down to earth together, my chest heaving against his and he looked back at me with a soft smirk.

We lay there for a long moment in silence our chests pressed tightly together, and then finally I felt him inhale and speak softly...

"So do you still want to try to get out of this date?" He asked and I couldn't help but smile.

It was cool, the full moon lit up the sky and the crickets and toads were singing their night song in celebration of our union.

"No (I answered still panting, my voice soft), but I don't know how little Miss Red Riding Hood is going to feel about this."

I answered with small smile in jest and Eric replied….

"How do you think she got her name?"

My jaw dropped, my head spinning once more, suddenly petrified wondering how many women Eric had Christened this very car with and I sat up straighter to look at him, but he just shook his head and smiled cheekily…

"Yeah, had you going there didn't I?"

"Now that was just evil!" I spat back, poked his chest, and he pulled me back to him for a tantalizing kiss to make up for it.

"I know, but you can take it out on me later."

I tossed my eyes up in the air and he handed me his plaid shirt. I wondered at first why he didn't just hand me my dress back, but then I realized, he wasn't done yet. Not that I was complaining, it was like a wall had been taken down between me and him and I could be myself again, not this awkward ex virgin roommate who couldn't sort out her feelings or her dates.

"Don't worry, I fully intend to, I'm an older woman now, older and wiser, you can't get away with the same stuff you used to." I replied with a smirk taking the shirt from him, I wrapped it around my shoulders, enjoying his scent enveloping me, while I got a lovely show as he found his pants and pulled them on.

"Yes, but where is the fun in that?" He turned back around clearly admiring my body. I felt a little self conscious, my face coloring pink again.

Eric offered me his hand and he asked me…

"C'mon, let's get some food, I don't bite..."

I laughed at the irony of his words. This coming from the Big Bad wolf himself. But I had to admit that I had been quite curious to what he packed for our picnic. It smelled heavenly as we were going out the door but I couldn't quite place it.

"Yes you do." I concluded knowingly, slipping off my heels handing them to Eric because frankly this wasn't the kind of terrain for heels.

"Well, I'll only bite when I'm starving." He answered assuring me with a cheeky smile and his signature brow raise which had my insides turning again, but I couldn't let him know that and tossed my eyes up in the air.

Eric grabbed the basket and carefully threw the rest of our clothing in the back of his car as he swiped 2 blankets. Yeah two, he was definitely prepared for this. I thought to myself smugly, and then we walked over to the willow tree. I was barefoot, but the grass was soft and lush and heavenly on my feet, so he spread out the first blanket and set down the picnic basket.

"After the Birthday girl of course."

I didn't know what time it was, but I was pretty sure it was late and I replied…

"I don't know how much of my Birthday is left."

"Then we better make the most of it." He replied with a smile. I never believed in that warm fuzzy feeling before, you know the one where you were supposed to feel completely safe and secure and loved. But I was pretty sure I had experienced something close just now.

I knelt down on the blanket and Eric came down beside me, and then he announced opening the basket.

"Now let's dig in!"

I laughed and then we both enjoyed a fantastic dinner of crab cakes, cole slaw, asparagus and fresh buttermilk biscuits.….

I was so impressed that Eric had attempted southern cuisine just for me, or most likely bought most of this and reheated. But it was still amazing and I kissed him lightly on the mouth and replied…

"That was delicious, thank you."

"Whatever the Birthday girl wants, the Birthday girl gets." He replied smugly popping another crab cake in his mouth and I replied grabbing the other blanket…

"Ooh careful sugar, I could really take advantage of you after a remark like that."

"I'm all yours." He winked at me. I waited for him to finish swallowing his crab cake and then I gave into my body's craving wanting to prove to him that I wasn't afraid to take what I wanted and pounced on him, pressing my lips to his I kissed him heatedly and he replied…

"Now that's more like it."

I rolled my eyes knowing he was definitely trying to egg me on, I could feel his desire pressing up against his jeans, which I thought was completely unfair because now I was the one going sans underwear. But there was something that had been tugging at me for awhile, unable to resist taking the opportunity while he was being so open, to ask…

"You purposely threw the game in bowling today didn't you?"

He smirked and shook his head denying it…

"Absolutely not, and I'm insulted you would even think such a thing." Eric raised his brow playfully, which I was quickly learning to be one of those tell signs that he was yanking my leg, and he pulled me back to him for a kiss.

His lips tugged at my soul and then that feeling came rushing back, the one that had been pulling at me before, that reached deep down into my core.

"So does this mean, no more dating other people?" He asked me.

"Does that work both ways?" I replied with a question and he acted like he was thinking really hard about the concept of monogamy, scratching his chin, I swatted his shoulder, and finally Eric smiled and he replied…

"And miss out on the Sookie Stackhouse saga? You drive a hard bargain darling, that fortunately for you, I can't refuse."

I smiled and then leaned in to kiss him, and Eric kissed me back once but then put his finger on my lip in pause and he asked me…

"What about the secret lovers thing?"

Yes, that was a tough one, I had to admit. Although it was obvious there could be only one real answer, I pursed my lips pretending that I was thinking very hard about it. He brought his hand along my side causing my body to tremble in desire, and teasingly arched his long fingers into the ticklish spot behind my elbow, I felt a quake and laughed as my body crumbled into his…

"I don't know, Ill have to think about that one." I challenged him.

"Is that so?" Eric asked bringing his other hand into the mix, this time gripping my naked behind, causing a jolt to run through me as he found another sensitive spot…

"So not Fair!" I shrieked , half laughing and he laughed with me, until the laughing faded and turned into something more.

"Nothing in life is ever fair." He mused and I lifted my head to look at him.

I met his gaze with longing in my eyes, wondering how it was possible for one man to have so much power over me. It was very scary in a way. This was nothing like my relationship with Bill. Nothing at all. With Bill it was all planned out and discussed, we even talked about at what point in our relationships it was love, 3 months of dating was average according to Bill, but with Eric, it was a rollercoaster ride, things moved much faster, and much slower if that made sense. I never felt this guttural pulling of my heart with Bill. It was frightening and invigorating all at the same time knowing we were just going on raw emotion alone. Whatever we were, and I wasn't going to analyze this now, it was deep. On one hand, I knew Eric had the power to crush me with one swing, but on the other, I also knew there was more behind this man, much much more, and as each wall caved in around us I found myself running towards him, wanting to be with him and no one else. Whatever this was, I couldn't stop it.

Finally I confessed after his lips found the crevice in my neck and began to suck a chosen spot which would eventually mark me.

"Yes, we can lose the secret, but you have to give me a little time to ease into things, can you do that for me?"

I asked him earnestly my stomach flipping over again when I thought of Eric and I becoming public. This meant I could tell people he was my boyfriend and he could tell them I was his girlfriend. I gulped nervously, and at the same time I was thinking, I might just give my poor Gran a heart attack with all the drama Id been bringing into her life lately. He paused for a moment and looked up into my eyes, and he promised with a look that tugged at my heart strings.

"Yes, I can do that."

I smiled softly as he brushed my hair away from my face and kissed me tenderly, the whole world transforming into soft orange and red hues as his lips touched mine sweetly.

It was a small price to pay for ecstasy, I thought.

He gently eased me onto my back on top of the soft blanket and concluded...

"Good, because I'm not done with you yet."

He smiled leaned into me and just as I thought his mouth was about to take mine, he moved his lips south.


	17. Chapter 17

**AN: **Im not going to say anything about this one, just let you read. I hope you enjoy the ride and thanks again to all for reading and those reviews! xoxo

**Chapter 17-My Baby's got A Secret**

We got home later that night, much later, and I held my breath anxiously, wondering if I could do this. Not because of Eric this time but because I was nervous about coming out of the closet so to speak.

Yes, I agreed that we wouldn't have to be secret lovers but that didn't mean I was going to sing from the rafters that I was dating Eric. I didn't want people to think I was jumping to the next available rebound I could find or that I didn't think this out. This entire process took time, I still had to accept that we were really dating.

I couldn't say how thankful I was when we got inside and discovered that both Pam and my Gran had already turned in for the night. I was so relieved, I gave Eric a quick peck on the cheek and told him I was turning in. I had to work in the morning after all.

"Stay with me tonight." He whispered catching my hand in his and I looked back at him in question. He explained…

"Only if you want, but I would like it if you did."

My heart nearly leapt out of my chest and into his when I saw his puppy dog eyes. I knew my Gran would not be happy to find me in Eric's bed tomorrow morning. But still, how could I say no to those eyes? Maybe if we were careful and I snuck back in my bed before she got up, would she really notice? She almost never came to check on me in my room.

No, it wasn't right.

"Eric, maybe we should take this slow." I tried to reason with him, but even in the darkness I could see his eyes fall in disappointment. And after a long pause he finally agreed.

"Okay."

I leaned in to kiss him, my lips catching his unsuspecting lips and he kissed me back. I didn't know what I was going to do about this man. It was bad enough we had conducted in a sexual relationship before we had even officially started dating.

"Goodnight." He whispered as my lips left his and I kissed him one more time for good measure.

"Goodnight."

I smiled to myself as he left thinking I had woken up this morning feeling so alone and desolate, and now I was going to sleep dreaming of my new boyfriend. And it was Eric of all people.

I rounded the corner and went into my bedroom. I snuck in quietly trying not to wake anyone and I washed up and changed into my pajamas.

I spotted a pile of my clean clothes on the chair and all of the sudden began to have second thoughts.

It was still my birthday right? I looked at the clock. For 5 more minutes anyway. I heard that little voice whisper in my ear…

'_What are you waiting for?'_

And I thought it must be the devil, but for some reason I couldn't help but listen to it. Grabbing a pair of clean shorts, a clean tee, panties and a bra, I stacked the clothing up in my arms and made a bee line for the door.

I was just about to round the corner to the stairs when I heard someone clear their throat and I stopped dead in my tracks…

"Ahem, going somewhere?"

My face drained white and I turned ever so hesitantly to face a looming and seemingly very smug Pam.

"Pam!" I croaked and I tried to explain, while at the same time, keep my voice down…

"I was just putting these clothes back in the hamper, they need to be cleaned."

I quickly shoved them into the hamper inside the hall closet. She raised a brow and answered…

"Hmmm, and do you always fold your dirty clothes?"

_I was so busted._

"Pam." I begged her for some mercy here and she asked me…

"So did you have fun tonight?" I couldn't tell if she was genuinely curious or teasing and I replied politely…

"Yes, Eric and I had a great picnic, he made crab cakes."

I looked to the side and hoped we weren't being too loud for my Gran out here and I announced lowering my voice….

"But it's late, Ill tell you the rest tomorrow, okay? Goodnight Pam!" I nodded a goodbye offering her a faint smile and then began to head back to my room.

"Where are you going?" She asked me quietly and I noticed she was also trying to keep her voice down. I looked back at her confused thinking the cat was out of the bag now, so wasn't it obvious where I was going?

"To bed." I replied and then she put her hand on my shoulder forcing me to stop and look at her again. I returned her gaze in question and she replied with one brow raised paired with a smirk…

"Yeah, but you are going the wrong way."

I creased my brows and then she lowered her head to meet my gaze and she whispered lowly…

"If you think for one second I'm going to let you go back to your own bed after its taken me nearly 2 weeks to get you two together, you have another thing coming, so run along darling."

I hesitated for a moment and Pam concluded…

"I'll cover for you."

I met her blue gaze in disbelief…

"Well are you going to sit out here and think about what you want to do all night or are you going to do it?" She asked me and she gestured for me to get moving so I had no other choice but to go. I kept my footing light on the stairs careful to avoid creaking, because when it happened it sounded like canon fire.

I scurried the rest of the way butterflies now attacking me, and I quickly slipped into Eric's room. I could hear the shower running and realized this could make for a very awkward situation. I wasn't about to initiate sex in my Gran's house while my Gran was sleeping under her own roof, talk about harlot. I half considered backing out, it's not like we hadn't had plenty of that earlier anyway, and took one step back towards his door when I heard the shower turn off. I didn't know what to do, not wanting to look like an idiot, I grabbed one of the book's on his dresser, crashed down in one of Jason's old leather recliners crossed my legs and tried to look innocent enough diving my head inside.

Of course completely unbeknownst to me, I had swiped what looked like Eric's journal. There were sketches on one side of the page, drawings of a dark room, a hand with two missing fingers, and as I flipped on, a man lying on the floor over a pool of blood. I creased my brows wondering what this was exactly. Was he drawing these images from memory? Could they be from the war perhaps? I couldn't even begin to fathom what that must have been like to go through.

I heard Eric brushing his teeth and knew I had to put this back, it wasn't my right to look at his private things, but when my eyes scanned the words...

_"There is a killer in him…"_

I frowned reading on...

_"There is a killer in me."_

I was more confused now than ever, quickly putting the book back where I got it, just in time to face a smirking Eric.

"Hi." I croaked and his brows rose in question. I thought I had been caught red handed, feeling terrible all of the sudden when he asked me, apparently unaware of my snooping...

"What are you doing here?"

Eric walked over to me in his boxer shorts, and I met his entrancing gaze. The one where I forget about everything and everyone else around us, as my heart started to hammer deafening my ear drums.

"Sookie?" He asked again and I finally snapped out of it, trying to focus.

"I um...I changed my mind." I replied softly and Eric's smile crept in slowly.

"You changed your mind huh?"

I nodded, and then my rational thoughts came back and I argued...

"But no hanky panky, just sleep okay?"

He looked back at me an eyebrow raised in question as he moved over to his side of the bed and replied...

"Sure."

I saw his smug smile as he turned to lift the covers but didn't say anything. It felt strange but right, like this is where I belonged. He got in and then I slid in next to him fluffing my pillow as he padded his and then turned to face me as I lay my head back and confessed…

"I can't believe how quickly these last few days flew by, I feel so irresponsible." I mused.

Eric looked back at me curiously and he asked…

"Why do you feel irresponsible?"

I met his gaze not quite sure how to respond to that, not sure if I knew the actual answer, but I pieced the thoughts from my head out loud and I answered…

"I just, I didn't get anything done over the break, not laundry or the dishes or gardening, I feel so guilty."

Eric traced his finger over the light blonde hairs on my arm and I felt little tiny shocks as he drew his line on me. I met his gaze with longing and he replied…

"It's your birthday Sookie."

"It was my birthday." I corrected him and concluded…"Now I'm just another day older."

He smiled gently grabbing his pillow he brought his head to the edge and met my gaze tiredly…

"See that's where you're wrong, you got a lot done. I seem to recall dragging you on the Ferris Wheel with me, we took photo's together, we tried deep fried cherry pie, went bowling, had cake, went on a picnic…"

I turned to face him, my body leaning into him closer, so close I could see his eyelashes and I answered truthfully…

"But that wasn't productive."

"And using your few days off to do chores and work like a dog would be?"

I creased my brow's not really saying that although when Eric put it that way, I guess I was.

"You take care of everyone but yourself don't you?" He asked. I didn't answer and turned on my back in reflection, but Eric continued nevertheless…

"Sookie, I'm not saying don't work hard, I know you take pride in working so hard and that is something I...(I looked back at him in question wondering the reason for his pause and he continued)...something I admire in you. What I'm saying is you need to remember yourself in all of that too, take some time to smell the roses, breaking out of that glass box remember?"

I thought Eric was starting to sound more and more like my Gran every day. What the hell was wrong with a little good hard work? Is what I wanted to know. My Gran grew up during the depression, she of all people should know how important that is.

"Well I just wasn't brought up to be lazy."

"I know you weren't, and you are not lazy. And I'm not saying you should be lazy either. I'm not saying you should do what you don't want to do, in fact quite the opposite. Do everything you've ever wanted."

I met his gaze in confusion and I asked him...

"So, tell me, have you done everything you've ever wanted to do?"

Eric smirked, and he confessed...

"No, but I try every day not to go to bed with any regrets."

My face relaxed having the feeling he would say something like that. He was so confident and sure of himself. It was very attractive, not to mention his body wasn't half bad either, and I found myself mesmerized by his earnest eyes and then I asked him curiously in challenge...

"Okay Mr. Perfect, name something you've wanted to do, but haven't yet."

He smirked again and leaned in closer, brushing his fingers across my cheek causing flutters to fly through my body, and then he confessed...

"This."

I felt my heart pump blood into my body as his lips met mine, sweetly at first our lips danced and then he used his tongue to trace my mouth in the most delicious tantalizing way. I wanted more as he reeled me in again, my body enveloping into his. I breathed out through my nose for one small hit of air before our tongues met and we kissed some more re-igniting the fire that had been burning inside us earlier.

I felt a pang in my heart, so connected to this man right now I wanted to cry in frustration because I felt like something was holding me back still, and as if Eric could hear my thoughts he pulled back, revealing a pair of swollen and deep pink lips, that mirrored mine...

"What about you? What's something you want to do, but haven't?"

I swallowed and looked back at him in agony while battling with my own angst, but he just glanced back at me calmly as if he was giving me permission to let go. I didn't answer him, I simply showed him, by nudging him onto his back.

I began to place soft kisses along his jaw and neck and then my lips found the hollow in his throat as my hands ran flatly along his smooth yet hard chiseled chest. I followed the light spray of blonde hair in between his breastbone, lingering for a moment, my tongue licking his nipple just once and then I continued on my journey south. But I wasn't even thinking like myself anymore, his body had me spellbound.

Eric gasped and looked down at me, and I felt a rush ofdéjà vuwashover me.

"Sookie?" He whispered as my lips neared his navel and I traced my tongue around the small hole of his belly button...

I found the waist of his boxer shorts brushing the covers aside, he gasped again...

"What are you..." But I simply silenced him with a

"Shhhh..."

I kissed his navel one more time for good measure and then I pulled my nightgown off over my head revealing my naked breasts to him, I assured him in a whisper throwing back a line he once gave me as I went back down noting the huge rising tent in his shorts...

"I'm not kissing you on the mouth."

He gasped again as the cool air brushed his skin after I slid his shorts down, revealing his very large manhood. I swallowed, almost overwhelmed, but I was a woman possessed. This wasn't like with Bill, it wasn't a chore or even for him, I was doing this because I wanted to experience this with Eric, because it felt new and invigorating, and reviving, like I felt on the first night we made love. I looked back at him, his dark gaze flicking with mine and then I leaned down. My aroused breast brushed his hardness and I felt myself grow wet. I leaned down to kiss the spot right before his course hair began to grow.

My nipples were so hard, they almost hurt as they scraped against his skin, I wanted to feel him inside me but I also wanted to taste his flesh, knowing there was only one way of making that happen, I leaned in and kissed the tip of his hard head.

I looked back at Eric and then slowly began to lick him. He was so big, so hard, I had to put my hand at his base to steady him, and then I plunged my mouth over his cock and began to suck on him, like a Popsicle.

Eric groaned and he hissed my name….

"Ssssookie, oh god!"

Hearing him gave me such pleasure, I felt my own desire grow, and it gave me a sense of empowerment. I wanted to give him the same gift he gave me and lowered my lips to his thigh as my hand pumped him up and down.

I bit down on his tender flesh and he cried out. I didn't even think about the possible noise we were making at that moment, but Eric must have because instead of groaning like he had been, his chest puffed up and down in quick short sharp breaths.

When I was satisfied with my work, my lips took his hardness in once more, like the neck of a glass bottle and I began to suck him hard and moan lightly over him, partially due to my own pleasure, partially to pleasure him, not sure how I was doing but before I could think about that, he began to thrust into my mouth lightly.

I gasped feeling my own orgasm build and I brought my hand down to my own wetness and began to rub myself. I had never done that in front of a man before and the pressure began to climax inside me.

I sucked harder one hand on him the other on me, and then I tasted something milky glide along my tongue.

"Sookie." He groaned again and I knew the moment was almost upon us. I wanted to come with him and pressed down on my sensitive clit, gasping as Eric muttered a string of what I could only assume was cursing in Swedish, and then his body jerked and I tasted his savory nectar as it flowed freely inside my mouth, my own orgasm trailing behind like a white cloud of haze.

I continued to lick him until I came down off that cloud and then I stopped and looked into his eyes, both of our chests heaving, eyes lucid, shocked and amazed by what had just conspired. I was at a loss for words, but before I could even think of what to say he pulled me up into his arms and kissed the hell out of me.

My body was literally putty in his hands and finally when our bodies would no longer let us breathe I collapsed against his strong frame. After a few moments of silence, I asked hoping it was as good for him as it was for me…

"Was that…okay?"

He still hadn't gotten his breathing back to normal, his chest expanding and collapsing and he turned to look at me and he replied with a spark in his eyes…

"Okay? Where have you been hiding all my life?"

I raised my brows in intrigue and Eric shook his head and he assured me…

"It's true."

He smiled and leaned in to kiss me again. And then he pulled back for a moment in pause and asked me…

"But I thought you said no hanky panky?"

I smirked and rolled my eyes and then replied…

"Well, that doesn't really count."

He chuckled and I could feel his chest rumble against mine. It was a delightful feeling, that brought the tingles back into my toes and then he answered…

"I beg to differ…"

"Go ahead, beg all you want." I challenged him quietly the spark bright between us and he simply smirked and pulled me back to lay with him, planting another kiss on my mouth before he yanked the covers back up. My ear pressed against his heart he replied absently…

"We happen to be moving at warp speed Darling…You're not going to come down with a case of amnesia tomorrow and forget this all happened are you?"

I smirked remembering the last time we had a sexual awakening and yes it wasn't pretty, I regretted taking that date with Sam, but that wasn't all my fault. I seem to recall a certain blonde ex girlfriend wake up call among other things that contributed to the chaos too, I looked back at him for a moment and replied...

"I won't if you won't." I pressed my ear back to his chest and relaxed for a few moments enjoying the lazy post coital bliss of just being here relaxed and in Eric's arms. And finally that little voice inside me decided to pipe in and I confessed…

"Promise you won't hurt me like he did."

I felt Eric's stomach muscles clench under my hand. I looked up at him with a vulnerability I didn't know I still had and he put his hand up to my cheek and his face fell to mine…

"That will never happen." He concluded and my chest filled with relief and I placed a kiss over his heart in gratitude.

"Sookie."

I met his gaze, his face had suddenly fallen serious and I met his gaze concerned...

"Yes?"

"There's something I need to tell you tomorrow, okay?"

I looked back at him and swallowed understanding that he wanted to tell me something important, not sure I needed to know, but apparently Eric thought I did, digging lightly...

"Why tomorrow? Why not now?"

He took a deep breath and then exhaled, clearly trying to hold back his emotion, Eric finally replied...

"Id rather tell you after I know for sure tomorrow, but it has to do with the reason I'm here."

I creased my brows. I couldn't pretend his words didn't have me on edge about what this news could be, especially because I thought he had already told me everything about why he was here. He needed to get away after the tragedy of Godric's death.

"Alright (I replied leerily) But I have to be honest, you are making me really nervous right now, you aren't going to tell me you have a wife and kids somewhere or something are you?" I asked him worriedly.

Then Eric's face fell into a soft smile, I felt relief flow through my veins because with just one smile he had told me all I needed to know and he brought his hand up to brush away the hair on the side of my face he explained gently...

"No, I don't have a wife and kids shacked up somewhere. Maybe a few mistresses on the side with a small army of fatherless children trailing behind, but I'm not married or anything."

I glanced at him for a moment and he looked at me seriously, but I knew he was kidding, my face finally falling into a smirk, and I shook my head in disbelief.

"That's not funny."

"I know it's not." He replied, the seriousness returning. And then Eric explained.

"Just trust me okay?" He asked and I shook my head in agreement, looking back at him, I answered softly…

"Okay, I trust you."

He smiled and kissed me one last time before we both drifted off to sleep, completely wrapped up in each other.

Sometime between 4am and dawn, I woke up again, after having a dream that Eric had disappeared. I turned to him thankful that it was just a stupid dream but he woke up and we started kissing, and one thing led to another. Before I knew it my panties were off and I was on top of him as we made slow quiet love in those early hours before dawn. It felt amazing, and I knew I could have easily continued and fallen back asleep next to him. But as the post coital haze lifted, I realized that if I wanted to avoid the cross examination and Q&A session with my Gran in the morning, I better go back up to my bedroom. Whether Pam was going to cover me or not, I didn't want to risk it, I didn't want my Gran to find out about us that way, I just had to figure out how to tell her in person.

So, I gave Eric one last kiss and told him that I couldn't wait till I saw him again in the morning.

When I got up to my bedroom, my bed felt so cold and big, even though I just had a full mattress. But I tried to make the best of the rest of the night. Luckily no more nightmares, but the sleep wasn't that good either.

I was happy when 8am rolled around and I could smell my Gran's cooking downstairs.

I got some clean clothes, to wear before I had to change into my work uniform, took a shower because I reeked of sex, checked my messages on the new phone, surprised to have one waiting for me, and then I went downstairs following the heavenly aroma of coffee and bacon wafting through the air.

"Hi Darling!" My Gran's face brightened and she smiled at me as I turned the corner to find Eric, Pam, and Jason, already seated at the table ready for breakfast.

"Sit down sugar, I've got waffles, bacon, and fruit." My mouth began to water at the sight of all that food on the counter.

"Wow." I replied with a smirk wondering what was going on. My gaze flicked with Eric's and he smiled faintly, causing a momentary wave of nostalgia to pass. Ignoring it, I asked them all…

"So is it the end of the world? Because I can't remember the last time we all had breakfast together."

"Tara aint here though." Jason replied stabbing a piece of melon with his fork and I smirked and informed him…

"Well if you stick around, she will be, she's picking me up for work, I got my first voice mail today from her.'

"Nah, I gotta go to work, but maybe Ill catch her later." Jason replied.

I couldn't hide my smirk as I thought back again to the gift Eric gave me and our amazing night. I was sure my face started to blush, so I quickly sat down at the table, taking the open seat next to him.

"Yes, it's nice to have everyone together isn't it?" My Gran smiled and set down a plate of fresh waffles and then she took the last remaining seat. I didn't know why, but for some reason, I couldn't stop smiling. It was so nice to have everyone together like this, like we were all one big happy family again.

It felt really good.

We finished up breakfast. I helped my Gran clean up the dishes, along with Pam. She announced that she had to go to the greenhouse down the road to pick up some new hostas for the back yard. I wanted to tell my Gran about Eric, but wanted to wait till I could get her alone, figuring maybe I could tell her after work.

Eric had already started on his outdoor chores, but I wanted to see him before I left. So I went back upstairs and changed into my waitress uniform.

I nearly bumped into my Gran when I got to the back door carrying a plate of cookies and a glass of sweet tea.

"Oh sorry, Gran."

She laughed and joked…

"No it's okay, Id ask where you were headed, but it looks like you were in a hurry."

I felt my cheeks grow heated, but thankfully my Gran just concluded…

"Anyway, I was just bringing this out to Eric."

"Oh I can do it." I offered possibly a little more quickly than I should have. Thankfully she didn't pick up on it and asked me…

"Are you sure?" I nodded, and then my Gran leaned in and kissed my cheek, and replied…

"Thank you sugar, I'm going to head out to do my errands then."

"Okay." I smiled and took the plate and glass from her with a smile.

"I'm glad you had a good Birthday yesterday."

"Thanks Gran, me too."

She blinked, and I swore I saw a twinkle in her eyes before she turned around to leave.

I swallowed, waited a quick beat and then darted back outside to find Eric.

I finally found him out by the front porch, with a sander in hand and his shirt already off. I couldn't help but bite my lip and feel a swell of lust wash through me at the beautiful picture he made.

He saw me approach and set down his power tools with a mischievous smirk and I replied as his eyes drifted over to the glass of ice tea and plate of cookies in my hand…

"Gran made this for you, she thought you might need some refreshments…"

"Then she knew what she was doing when she chose her messenger." He answered wiping his brow with a smile that made my knees buckle.

I didn't know what I was doing, only that my feet were moving forward towards him without my conscious thought. I set down the plate of cookies and glass on the porch and threw my arms around him, pulling his neck down to meet my lips in a sizzling kiss. I felt him wrap his arms around me and return my kiss, and it was just like last night all over again.

"What was that for?" Eric asked me after we both took a moment to breathe, and I replied coyly…

"That was a thank you for last night."

He smiled and answered…

"Well in that case, we better go on dates more often."

"Yes, we better." I countered and he leaned down to kiss me again, assuring me with those amazingly intense blue eyes…

"We will, tonight. In fact…I think we have cause for celebration…"

I smiled excitedly, wishing I had a remote that fast forwarded time because I would have done it in a split second and then he kissed me again. My nipples hardened and I was about to get swept away when I remembered that I had to get going…

"I have to go to work."

"Alright." He replied, his forehead still pressed against mine, neither of us made a move to part. And he offered…

"How about, I pick you up tonight? Then we can get started on that date earlier."

My lips turned up, and I felt those butterflies again, looking into his eyes, I replied…

"Yes, Id like that."

He kissed me, and I kissed him back passionately, this time trying to make it count because my body certainly didn't want me to leave, in fact I highly suspected my body was in cahoots with Eric's petitioning for me to stay.

I gasped the heat already coursing through my thighs and I knew if I didn't put a stop to this now, I would have been tempted to call in sick, but duty called. Sam was likely to have hired a new waitress by now, one who actually showed up.

"I have to go." I smiled, he took my hand and nodded, replying with that smirk that made my knees weaken once more…

"Until we meet again then."

I blushed smiling coyly I finally left him, my body sore and aching because my body was protesting against me on all levels. I heard Eric turn the sander back on, smiling to myself and that's when I noticed we were being watched, my smile fading.

It was Tara.

"Don't even try to tell me you two aint bunny hopping into the next century."

I flipped my eyes up and, thought about what I was going to say.

"With kissing like that, how did you even get out of bed? I think I need to take a cold shower before my shift."

I shook my head, thinking she was something else. I walked into the house because I needed to grab a change of clothes if Eric was picking me up and she challenged me…

"All right Stackhouse, spill the beans, how long have you and Tall, Dark, and Handsome been dancing the horizontal cha cha?"

My face colored a nice crimson shade as I pulled out the nearest dress I could find. I finally turned to her and confessed, knowing she wouldn't leave me alone if I didn't and I had to start some time…

"Yes, we are a couple, but we didn't officially decide that until yesterday."

Tara smiled at me smugly and she raised her brow…

"So that whole deal with Sam, was it just a ploy to distract us or to make him jealous?"

I rolled my eyes and answered…

"That was a misunderstanding."

I could tell Tara's mind was running a mile a minute and she confessed as if she just had a lightning bolt moment….

"Oh my god, that's why you and Bill broke up wasn't it? You had a thing for Eric and the dickhead couldn't take the heat so he came after you!"

"Okay Tara, that's enough." I concluded grabbing my clothes. I didn't really want to talk about Bill today. Talk about a buzz kill. But Tara just smiled smugly and followed me out, finally concluding…

"Well I think you made the right choice…Bill was a dickhead…Eric is a GQ cover boy and he's into you, hands down, no competition."

"Thank you Tara, I can rest easy now that I know we have the Tara stamp of approval!" I added sarcastically and she chuckled…

"You said we! That's so sickeningly sweet."

I knew this was the reason I put off telling her about it in the first place. I would be an endless source of amusement for her all afternoon long and I was right.

When 6 pm rolled around I was wound up tighter than a pocket watch. I didn't know why, but I was nervous again, nervous that maybe that last night was a once in a blue moon kind of thing. It felt almost too good to be true.

But when he walked through those doors, all doubt left my mind, and my body. He had my stomach going again. My body had been humming all day, but now it was like all the back up generators were turned on and I was lit up.

He was dressed casually in jeans and a black vee neck tee and waltzed over. About 20 pairs of eyes followed him across the room to me. He leaned in to kiss my cheek, and I felt like shouting to all those other women…

'He's mine.'

And he whispered in my ear…

"I missed you.' Which in turn caused my heart to flutter.

"I missed you too." I confessed with a blushing smile ready to fly to Mars with him if he asked me to, but then I looked down and realized I was still dressed in my waitress uniform and I replied…

"Let me just go change and we can go, all right."

About 10 minutes later we got to Eric's car I just couldn't contain myself. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him fully on the mouth. I know I had only seen him just a few hours ago, but this urge to connect with him was coursing through my blood.

"So where are we going on our date?" I asked him breathlessly and he asked me with lucid eyes…

"How about home?"

I rose my brow in curiosity and he smiled and replied…

"I got take out Chinese when I drove back from Shreveport and your Grandmother will be at her history club until later this evening."

I smiled to myself, grabbed his hand just happy to be off work and with Eric…

"Well what are we waiting for? I'm starving."

And I really was.

I hadn't had Chinese food that often, in fact I think I can count on one hand the number of times I've had it. You just don't see that kind of food down in the South, but Shreveport was a bigger city, with more diversity. I knew Eric had good taste and trusted his food choices.

When we got to the house, I was tickled pink when I realized Pam was also gone. That meant we had the house completely to ourselves and I wasn't going to waste a single minute.

Eric heated up the food while I set the table. I found two fortune cookies and divided them up.

Eric set down a tapered candle in between us and I felt those warm fuzzy feelings coming back. He really was good at this, I thought.

"Chop sticks?" He offered me from behind, but I shook my head knowing I was in a hurry to get to dessert, for more reasons than one.

"I'm good."

He smiled and then set down a beautiful array of colorful food. Kung Pao shrimp, Moo Goo Gai Pan with chicken, rice, and spring rolls.

Every piece of food brought a new sensation to my mouth. When we were finally finished, I almost felt like I couldn't fit any more food into my stomach but I somehow found room for the fortune cookie.

He smirked and cracked his open as I opened mine.

"What does yours say?" Eric asked me with that brow raised again….

"You first." I teased. He flipped his eyes up and then read it aloud…

"Your girlfriend is a maniacal vixen and she might be a bit of hell cat in the sack, but she's worth all the trouble, so don't let her get away."

I laughed feeling my face pinking knowing he was kidding and asked him…

"Yeah sure, now what does it really say?"

He smirked and finally looked down at the paper and replied smugly…

"Your everlasting patience will be rewarded."

I flipped my eyes up and he countered…

"Your turn."

I looked down at my small piece of paper and read aloud…

"A pleasant surprise is in store for you."

Eric smiled and he answered…

"Yes, I think that one is very true."

It wasn't bad, Id take that one although I half wondered if we got our two fortunes mixed up.

"So speaking of pleasant surprises, I have been meaning to talk to you about something…" Eric began.

But at that moment I looked at the clock, noting how time had kind of gotten away from us while we enjoyed our dinner, and I wanted to take advantage of the privacy before everyone got home.

"Would you mind if we talked about that after?" I asked Eric sweetly "We only have about an hour and a half before my Gran gets home and we can talk while she's here but it's not so easy to…" I explained waggling my brows suggestively hoping he would get the message without me having to say it.

Eric smirked smugly at me and he replied…

"Well, when you put it that way, how can I refuse?"

I just shook my head and stood up asking me to help clear off the table and put the food away quickly. For some reason I felt like we had to do this now, we had to hurry because we might not get to do anything later.

We found ourselves back in the living room. I didn't want to do it in such a public place but Eric argued this way we could keep an eye on the driveway and not be caught red handed. That was if we weren't in the throws of passion, I thought absently.

Eric lit a couple of candles around us in the living room and then my body lit up like a firecracker about to go off when I saw him yank off his shirt. He grabbed the blanket and nudged me onto the couch with him. I'm sure we looked a little desperate but that was the last thing on my mind when Eric leaned down to kiss me while yanking off my panties and pulling up my skirt with that devilish smirk of his. I was already so wet when his hand found my aching sheath I shuddered.

I unzipped his pants helping to guide them down over his hips and butt with my hands and thighs combined and then he found his position lowering his hardness down into me slowly creating an energy between us that could only be described as ecstasy.

I moaned at first contact trembling again and looked into his eyes as he began to thrust slowly. Only the pleasure was so intense I had to close my eyes for a moment and that's when I felt Eric slide the straps of my dress exposing me and then he bit down on my hard yet very aroused peak. I moaned in pleasure and wrapped my legs around his thighs more securely while he did the same thing to the other one. And then he rode his way to our combined climax as I tossed my head back and he thrust in again and again and again while my cries mixed with his heavy breathing grew louder in pleasure with every throttle.

I felt my inner most walls expand and contract with him until finally we both surrendered to the abysmal haze of our orgasms as we flooded each other inside and out. I opened my eyes, the candlelight on the table behind me flickering and then it blew out, as did the other, darkening the room completely. A sudden chill brought me out of my haze to look at Eric as he hovered above me and that's when I saw a shadowy figure standing behind him. My eyes opened wide and my body froze in fear.

The person cleared their throat from behind. Eric jumped off me at attention pulling his pants back up, after tossing the blanket to me. I sat up quickly scrambling to find the straps to my dress and that's when Eric flicked the light on.

Pits sank in my stomach because standing right there in my foyer watching me yank my dress back up was Bill.

"Compton, what the hell are you doing here?" Eric growled stepping closer, his full 6 foot 5 frame towering over him. But Bill just glared at him and he replied, his face falling once more when he looked at me…

"I apologize for the intrusion, I thought I heard crying. (He glanced back at me painfully and Bill continued…) I came to talk to you, but since Sookie is here, I might as well tell you both."

"Tell us what?" Eric hissed. "You've got some nerve showing up here after what you put her through!"

"What I put her through?" He scoffed and shook his head glaring back at Eric once more.

This was not good, I didn't know why, but all I could feel at the moment was dread and despair. Standing up after covertly pulling on my clothes under the blanket wanting to get this over with quickly, I asked Bill point blank in my frustration…

"Bill why are you here?"

Bill looked back from Eric to me once more, the hurt apparent on his face when his eyes flicked with mine, but I wouldn't succumb to the pressure to feel guilty just yet. Finally he explained…

"I came here to tell you're new boyfriend that he has till tomorrow to leave town."

"What?" I asked him confused and Bill explained…

"Judging by your confusion, I see that he hasn't told you why he was here."

I looked back at Eric and Eric replied…

"I was about to tell her."

Bill scoffed and he shook his head in angry disbelief. I could tell he was struggling to maintain his gentlemanly composure and finally he replied despite my spinning head…

"Well it seems Mr. Northman is under house arrest, while they investigate the murder of his associate, friend, and business partner, Sargeant Godric Godfrey."

I looked back at Eric in question thinking there had to be some mistake, but his eyes were unwavering locked on Bill.

"Is this true Eric?" I asked him, my voice suddenly shaky and Eric shook his head darting his gaze towards mine…

"Sookie, you have to let me explain, they cleared the charges today, I am a free man."

Bill snorted and he replied…

"I don't think so. In addition to your fingerprints on the murder weapon, there is also a neighbor who witnessed you arriving at his house 25 minutes before the murder took place. I took the liberty of dropping my leads off at the Shreveport Police department this afternoon. You see once I got back from my three day trek in the wilderness, after being tied to a tree naked and left for dead, once I escaped the bonds and had soaked the bug bites that caked my body from head to toe, and was discharged from a hospital after 2 days of dehydration treatment, I vowed to find some dirt on you. And boy did I hit the mother load. After that, it was only a matter of time."

Eric looked back at Bill horrified, and I just stood there stunned, unable to believe any of this could be true. This wasn't the Eric I knew, this wasn't the Eric I…

I felt my eyes tear up a ball of emotions churning inside me and Bill concluded…

"After what you did to me, it was the least I could do."

Eric glared at him, and he asked him point blank, his jaw tense and eyes sharp….

"So why didn't you just bring the police with you now? Why wait?"

I gulped inwardly because it sounded an awful lot like Eric was admitting all of this was true.

Bill smirked, sneaking a glance over at me and then he replied…

"Because I care about the Stackhouse's, I didn't want them to have to deal with you and the police, I didn't want to be the villain, you see Mr. Northman, I didn't do any of this, you did it all by yourself."

Bill looked proud of himself and he finally concluded…

"I'm pressing charges tomorrow morning whether you like it or not, but the choice is up to you whether or not you want to go willingly to turn yourself in or you need them to come and collect you."

I looked at Eric begging him to please tell me this wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening, my stomach sinking in sickness with every passing moment of silence between us. I thought back to his journal and those horrible pictures and I wondered what if Bill was right?

"Is it true?" My small fearful voice asked him unable to meet his gaze, but before he could reply, Bill concluded…

"Leave Bon Temps Northman, you are no longer welcome here!"

"That's what those drawings in your journal portrayed wasn't it?" I looked back at Eric and asked him sharply not trusting my own voice.

"You killed him? You killed your best friend?"

Eric's alarmed glare darted back to mine and I could only assume he knew he had been caught. The jig was up, the secret was out.

"Sookie…DON'T DO THIS, don't listen to him, he has NO IDEA what happened…I DIDN'T KILL HIM, I SWEAR!" Eric exclaimed his cracking voice now filled with pain, but I didn't know what to think, if there was a witness and those drawings, and his prints were on the gun? How could I believe he was innocent?

So I did the only thing I could do, tried to find my headspace as I sorted through all of this and there was only one way to do that.

"Eric I want you out of this house right now!"

There was a moment of silence and then Bill growled at Eric…

"You heard her."

"You too Bill, go now!" I demanded. Eric met my gaze and he pulled at my heartstrings looking so lost, but I knew just like Bill he had the power to break my heart, if he hadn't already. I had tears rolling down my face when Eric tried to plea with me again…

"Sookie, PLEASE."

"GET OUT!" I answered sharply, still unable to look at him. I just couldn't believe it, still in shock.

Bill cast Eric a smug smile as he left. Eric glared at him and then caught my gaze looking at me like I just ripped his heart out. But the irony was, I was the one with my heart ripped out and he was holding it still beating in his hand.

I shook my head not wanting to hear anymore tonight. I couldn't handle it. I could barely handle him here with me now. Eric grabbed his car keys, his leather jacket, and then left the house with one last painful glance back at me.

I couldn't hold it in anymore, I shut the door quickly behind him, locked it, and then the tears flowed freely from my aching eyes.

_What just happened?_

I wondered collapsing down on the bottom stair with a sinking heart.


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: **Okay well this chapter is an emotional chapter. Judging from some reader reactions to the last one Im going to put up a high angst warning on this chapter, in fact that warning is going to stay up for the next few chapters. So if you dont dig the angst, I would recommend waiting a few to check back in, I promise I wont mind. Everyone has their angst tolerance levels. It's not all bad, there is some really good stuff too, so dont let my warning scare you away, atleast I hope you will think its good, but I just wanted to give you the precaution.

Also, Im going away on vacation for a week starting Friday, so chances are I wont have the new chapter up by then. Unfortunately Im not going to be bringing my laptop along :( so this story will have to go on vacation with me. Anyway, there is going to probably be a bit of a gap between this chapter and the next. I will try my best to get it up as soon as I get back. I promise I wont leave it hanging where it is, lol. Or I may really have to go into hiding. ;)

Kay, well without further adieu, I hope you enjoy. Thanks always for reading and reviewing. xo

**Chapter 18-Cadence**

_EPOV_

"Eric?"

I wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone right now, let alone Pam of all people, just wanting to get my shit together I nodded at Pam in acknowledgement as I descended the porch stairs hoping she could take the hint, but then she asked me the inevitable...

"Was that Sookie's ex I just saw leaving?"

"Yes." I took out my phone hoping I had enough of a battery left to make a call.

"Do you care to enlighten me as to what he was doing here?"

I looked at her, and then back at my phone, amazed that I was surprisingly feeling very calm right now, although I was sure it would soon hit me…

"He's pressing charges."

"The rapist is pressing charges? Oh do tell, this should be rich." Pam replied smugly.

My gaze met hers and I concluded with a hard face, feeling those familiar pangs of anger returning…

"Apparently he managed to find a witness who said they saw me enter Godric's house 25 minutes before he was murdered."

"Well clearly Bill doesn't have the full story, that won't even hold up in court, but what is this business about pressing charges? Eric? (She looked at me worriedly and Pam asked me in question) Why would he press charges?"

I looked back at her my anger festering and then I glanced back at the house, knowing Sookie most likely thought I did it and that was that. It was bound to happen eventually. Things were looking too good anyway.

"Eric?" She asked me again, I sighed, bringing my arm down in frustration I finally replied angrily...

"I kind of had Longshadow take him out to the swamp and leave him there, tied to a tree in his underwear, he ended up being stuck out there for 3 days."

I could tell Pam was trying hard not to crack a smile. I saw the side of her lip curve up, but then she stopped and asked me...

"So you were never intending to let the man go?"

"I don't know, I didn't really think that part out, at the time I didn't care if he was devoured by crocodiles and never heard from again!"

I was tired of being grilled, tired of talking about that asshole and my hatred for him, just wanting to get the fuck out of here like yesterday.

I threw my hands up in exasperation and stepped away from her onto the path. This all felt so surreal, and I just wanted to forget it all. But I knew I couldn't. Godric was dead, I could kiss the bar away, Sookie hated me, and I was most likely going to prison for a very long time.

She sighed in frustration and cursed my name...

"Eric."

I looked back at her just waiting for her to run the usual rundown by me, it was going to be alright, we would get help, yada yada, but instead, she replied...

"You brought this on yourself you know."

Okay, now I was starting to get angry, and I snapped back.

"I brought this on myself? How?"

"You were too afraid to tell her, too afraid she couldn't handle it and now her bastard ex is waiting to bite you like a snake in the grass."

"I didn't want her to have to deal with my shit too, she had enough on her plate."

"As opposed to now?"

"She could have had more faith in me, she believed him over me for Christ sakes!"

"Of course she did."

I was starting to get very aggravated, thinking Pam was siding with her because of that women stick together bull shit, and replied…

"Pam I…I can't think about this now, I have to call my lawyer and figure out what my next move is." I replied trying to brush her off, going back to my phone.

"Fine, but don't go anywhere, I want to talk to you after I talk to her."

My head was spinning. I could barely think straight. Feeling a mixture of betrayal, hurt, and anger, I made the call to my lawyer, Mr. Cataliades to inform him of my recent predicament.

I wished I had let Longshadow do what he really wanted and hand Bill off to his Native American friends. But I couldn't think about that now. I had to concentrate how I was going to get myself out of this without facing parole in 60-80 years.

About 15 minutes later after a very heated discussion via the phone, Mr. Cataliades and I worked out a plan. I was going to go to the police so they could question me in good faith and tell them again what happened. Cataliades would meet me there tomorrow morning at 9am.

I sunk down on the bench swing on the front porch when it was all over, wishing for just a moment I would have shot that fucker instead. I put my hands over my face, my head swimming wondering if this was it, when I heard the porch door creek open behind me.

I glanced up and saw Sookie standing there watching me. She looked like she had been crying. I couldn't believe how much could change in such a short time. Thirty minutes ago we were making love on the couch in her living room, but now...Now all I felt was dread and despair. I was fully expecting her to tell me right then and there that we were done.

Pam came out behind her and I didn't know what was worse. Having my girlfriend break up with me or letting my ex watch it. I looked down at my hands clasped around my phone and then back up at Sookie in question.

"Go ahead, take a seat." Pam encouraged her. She looked back at Pam and then me apprehensively, and took a careful seat next to me on the bench.

Pam sat in the wicker chair facing us, crossing her legs, I knew what was about to happen before she even started. The only thing missing was the therapist couch. I glared at her and she simply folded her hands and announced...

"Since you two can't seem to work things out on your own, I'm going to help you communicate."

"You must be joking?" I asked her sharply letting her know I wasn't in the mood to be toyed with right now sitting up in my seat in agitation. But Pam cut me off...

"Eric. (She sent me a she meant business glare and then concluded…) You need all the help you can get right now, you can't afford to burn any bridges, so sit back and listen."

Pam concluded sharply.

I felt like a delinquent child glaring at his mother in challenge, but I simply folded my arms and shot her my annoyed glance instead. _For real? She was actually doing this? Someone please kill me now_, I chanted silently to myself.

Pam took it upon herself to play referee, so what else could I do but go along with it. For a split second I actually thought maybe Godric was on to something, ending it all. He took the smart way out. _Lucky bastard._

Emotions were boiling inside me and I felt like punching something, but instead I clenched my hands and sat back reluctantly. Partially because I was a glutton for punishment, partially because as Pam pointed out, I was rapidly running out of options.

"Eric, I want you to go first, I want you to tell Sookie what happened that night, in your words." She addressed me and I looked up at her in question, but she was quite serious, her expression unwavering.

I glanced back at Sookie, and she replied softly looking at me through lowered lashes...

"I'm listening."

"This is stupid." I remarked under my breath, but Pam simply folded her hands and cast me a warning glare. I wanted to tell her to go fuck herself and then go find a magic rocket ship to blow off in, but I didn't want to add more fuel to her fire.

I sighed, not knowing what to think, wondering what Pam even said to Sookie to get her to come out here. It had to be good. I had to give the woman credit, she could charm a fish out of the water and into the frying pan. I'm sure she used those same skills on Sookie.

"Go ahead Eric, you have the floor." Pam encouraged me. I looked back from Pam to Sookie hesitantly and then down at my hands, figuring I might as well get some practice in because I was going to have to tell this story over and over again, just like before.

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, rubbed my temple feeling a pounding headache coming on. How appropriate, I thought. But I knew they were waiting, and I didn't really care any more what anyone thought.

I glanced up at Sookie, her eyes were unwavering and then I looked out at the old Oak tree in the front yard. I could see the cemetery in the background and finally I came back to them, looking down at my feet because I was in this alone, as much as I wanted to believe I had support, this was my problem. I began in an attempt to cleanse myself from all outside influences and emotion, so I could keep my head above water...

"That night was a night like any other, I was working at the bar...Godric was supposed to come in but he said he wasn't feeling well. I knew he was struggling with his depression so I let it slide thinking he just needed a little time to himself. When I left work that night I decided to drive by his house to make sure things were okay.

I knew something was wrong the instant I stepped foot inside that house. Music was playing loudly, heavy metal. My gut told me something was wrong and I needed to find Godric. Once I scanned the first floor realizing he wasn't there, I took the stairs. The moment I rounded the corner I smelled the unmistakable odor of gun powder and my adrenaline began to pump."

I put my hands over my face once more, to support my throbbing head as I relived that horrible night, continuing...

"I passed the bathroom, no Godric, the office, no Godric, then I saw the closed door at the end of the dark hall, and dared to open it. The first thing I saw was his M-9 Beretta pistol on the floor blocking the door. I picked it up and was able to shove the door open, and that's when I saw all the blood."

I tried to keep my eyes from tearing up, dropping my hands in frustration, I had replayed the scene so many times in my mind I was sure it was seared into my brain, every detail, every smell, the sound of my feet creaking on the wood floor, the silence of Godric's corpse after death, it was all there. He haunted my thoughts and my dreams. Trying to keep my emotions in check, I continued hearing the croak of my voice...

"Godric was lying in it, the blood pouring out of his head into a red pool on the floor. There was blood, so much blood, it was everywhere."

I felt the heat burn my eyes as I took a deep breath and attempted to go on, feeling those oppressively sharp raw heaving pains in my chest as the horrific memories all came flooding back as if the raw pain was yesterday.

"He, was...he was dead...I tried to check his pulse, I had to move him, I couldn't look at him like that lying on the floor in his own blood, I would have tried to save him, he was my best friend, we had seen so much together, experienced so much, I didn't want to let him go...He… I called 911 when I couldn't find a pulse. I remember the metallic smell, I had smelled it a hundred times before in the war, but this time it made me sick"

Before I could continue Sookie moved over and wrapped her arms around me. Trapped in that moment my mind froze on Godric's dead face, once so full of life now pale and vacant. When his brown soul less eyes looked into mine as I set him down back against the wall, I felt a kind of haunted pain I had never experienced before and never wanted to again.

"It's okay, I'm here." She whispered.

I didn't know if it was her pity or her support, but I closed my eyes and held her tighter.

Pam moved from her chair across from us to the chair next to me and placed her hand on my arm. I felt like I was standing outside myself watching it all from afar.

"Eric, I know it's hard, but you have to go on…We are here for you." Pam assured me gently.

I opened my eyes and looked back at her, closing my eyes again, trying to shut out the pain for a moment, but I knew I had to explain, nodding my head, as Sookie pulled back and took my hand in hers…

"The gun…The gun, I hadn't realized was half cocked to fire and when I collapsed down to my knees next to his body the gun went off again, this time puncturing his chest.

My eyes teared, and I pledged…

"It was an accident…But they had my prints…They had the strange angle of the second bullet hole wound, they had motive-if Godric were to die I would inherit his share of the bar as well as his life insurance policy, they had me leaning over him crying when the police arrived."

"I may as well be guilty, all the evidence points to it."

I concluded throwing my hands down and shrugging off Pam and Sookie. I didn't want their comfort or pity right now, I didn't need it. Placing my hand on the back of my neck, I concluded sharply…

"So, that's it…Fucked over backwards, forwards, sideways, in reverse, every day of the year, and twice on Sunday."

Pam folded her hands nodding her head she looked down for a moment. I didn't know what she was thinking or about to say, maybe 'Told you so.'

But then she looked up and turned to Sookie.

"Sookie, I want you to tell Eric what you told me."

Sookie looked back at me hesitantly, and I had no idea what she was about to say, bracing myself for the worst I sat back pulling myself together because I didn't want to appear week and folded my arms expectantly. Here it comes, I thought. Let the torture commence.

Sookie looked at me for a long moment, and my eyes dared to flash with hers for a second having no idea what was about to come out of her mouth. I had felt so close to her before, so close I almost told her something important, something I could never take back, but that was all flushed down the toilet now, along with my life. I didn't have anything else to say to her in my defense, if she wanted to picture me as a killer, so be it, it was true anyway.

"Go ahead Sookie." Pam replied, encouraging her.

She looked at Pam again, but Pam just nodded her head in encouragement. Sookie swallowed and then looked at me, took a deep breath and then began...

"I...I don't know where to begin..."

"Just tell him what you said inside." Pam replied taking the chair across from me once more. I shook my head thinking that woman was hopeless. I looked back at Sookie expectantly waiting for the words to come, like...'We need to talk,' or, 'it's over', or, 'I don't think we should see each other anymore'...maybe even, 'it's not you it's me,' but she didn't say that. Instead she sighed, looked at me square in the eyes and replied...

"You scare me sometimes Eric."

I creased my brows, knowing this wasn't going to end well. Sitting up straighter so that I could make a bee line out of here when it was over, she went on...

"I don't recognize myself when I'm with you, it's like I'm someone else."

I shook my head thinking, yep here it comes...

"I don't like what you did to Bill...I said I handled it and I did, and you didn't listen to me, you just dealt with him yourself...I feel like I know you so well sometimes and other times I don't know you at all, because the Eric I know never would have done that."

I wasn't about to argue with her. I wasn't sorry for what happened to Bill, the fucker had it coming.

She took a deep breath, and I knew the words were on the tip of her tongue. Just say we're through so I can get on with this night from hell, I thought.

"I cant believe you kept the fact that you were under house arrest a secret from me all that time, after all we'd been through together, I thought you said we could trust each other, I know you wanted to tell me earlier tonight, but why didn't you tell me sooner? Why didn't you trust ME Eric?"

Her eyes plead with mine and I felt a stirring in my chest, as if her pain was bleeding into mine. Suddenly feeling worse off than I already was if that was possible. I wanted to throw my arms around her and tell her I was sorry, so sorry, but I couldn't. Clenching the side of the bench, I looked down at my feet and back at her as she continued...

"You mean so much to me, I think that's why this hurts so much to learn all of this, and from Bill of all people. We were having a nice night, I was looking forward to spending time with you all day at work and then I find out you've been lying this whole time."

I was about to argue with her and tell her I wasn't lying, I simply didn't divulge a certain part of information, and for good reason. Look how well this was turning out already, but she didn't give me the chance.

"Just when I think I've found something special, meaningful, I realize it could all be taken away from me, from us in a blink of an eye, and that scares me more than anything."

I looked back at her in question. Did she just say 'us'? I wondered, trying to figure out what she was trying to get out and she creased her brows and looked back at me and answered my thoughts out loud...

"I don't know what to do, I'm just as lost as you...but I...I..."

Just as she was about to say something more another pair of headlights pulled up into the driveway. I recognized the vehicle instantly as Adele's pick up truck, knowing this was going to get really uncomfortable soon. The woman knew she was hosting me while under house arrest, the station even checked in with her from time to time, but it was clear Sookie had no clue of that. I felt I had worn out my welcome, and needed to tell Adele I was leaving.

The engine cut off as well as the headlights and I heard the door open and close shut. Then Adele came around the side and replied…

"Well if someone would have told me we were having a party, I would have stopped off at the liquor store to buy some more beer, what's the occasion?"

Adele asked cheerfully, but one look at me and her smile faded and she asked us...

"Oh dear, something's wrong, what is it?"

Sookie and Pam looked back at me to answer. I wasn't one to cower away in some corner and cry boo, I was going to take my punishment like a man, and Sookie's grandmother could take the first shot, since she deserved it for her kind hospitality.

I took one deep breath, stood up and replied...

"I have to go to the Shreveport police station. They found more evidence in Godric's investigation, which puts me back on the suspect list..."

"What evidence?" I saw Adele glance at Sookie momentarily and then she looked back at me.

"A witness, says they saw me enter his house before the shots went off."

Which was true I supposed, not that anyone would believe me if I said I accidentally shot Godric.

Her face creased in a frown, and she shook her head...

"That's bull puckey, who is this witness? You shouldn't have to go to the police if they don't have any solid proof. I thought you were cleared of your charges today?"

Sookie's head whipped back to me and I knew then I had really dug myself a trench. She wasn't going to be happy that I had talked to her grandmother about my situation and not her. That hole in the back yard wasn't nearly deep enough. But why stop now?

"That's not all of it." I replied distastefully.

Adele took one step up and she placed her hand on the railing and remarked...

"Why do I have a feeling things get worse?"

I told Adele what I could about Bill, choosing my words carefully because I knew Sookie certainly wouldn't like me talking about what happened to her, nor would she ever forgive me if I did, basically concluding that Bill didn't like me hanging around Sookie. I didn't tell her anything more because I wanted to keep Sookie out of this, looking at Sookie momentarily, her confused, hurt, and emotional eyes met mine for a brief second and then we looked back at Adele and I informed her that we basically got in a fight, Bill threatened me, so I left him stranded and now he is also pressing charges.

When it was all said and done she shook her head in what I could only assume was disappointment and she replied...

"Boy, you certainly have gotten yourself into a pickle...That wasn't smart goin after Bill Compton, he comes from money..."

Her gaze met mine and I nodded understanding the predicament I was in to the fullest capacity. Then Adele looked back to Sookie and she asked us point blank...

"So you two are an item now?"

Adele glanced at me, then Sookie looked at me, I glanced at Sookie and then Adele looked at her, unwilling to say anything more to incriminate myself, then Sookie replied to my disbelief...

"Yes Gran."

Adele didn't say anything, but I thought I saw her lip twitch. I looked back at Sookie leerily, unsure of where we really were now. Obviously the terms of our relationship were contingent on whether Sookie would ever talk to me again after this, but I didn't want to get into that now.

Thankfully Adele seemed to empathize with my current predicament and she suggested...

"Well it looks like we got our work cut out for us then, Eric you call your lawyer and Ill talk to Sheriff Dearborn, see if there's not anything we can do."

"I already talked to my lawyer, I'm meeting him tomorrow at 9am in Shreveport." I looked over to Pam and added...

"But I need to go over some things with Pam."

I glanced back at Sookie for a moment trying to register her level of anger with me on a scale of 1 to 10, getting nothing, and then Adele nodded in agreement and she replied...

"Yes (She looked over to Sookie and nodded to her) Sookie honey, why don't you come inside with me, Ill make us some tea (She looked back at me and Pam announcing) And then I think we should all get some shut eye, tomorrow is going to be a big day."

I didn't know how much sleep I would get tonight, but I humored Adele, knowing she meant well, and nodded my head in agreement

They disappeared into the house and then I turned to Pam and we went over my affairs. I had to be prepared incase I wasn't coming back after I turned myself in tomorrow. Pam was the only one who had access to all my paperwork, and when this happened the first time, I had my Lawyer, Mr. Cataliades, draw up power of attorney papers for her, so she could make executive decisions.

We went over the bar, we had agreed that if I was incarcerated the deed would be split evenly between she and Chow. Pam argued that I was getting ahead of myself, that I was jinxing myself before we even began the fight, but I needed to make sure I was ready for anything.

The condo was taken care of, I had the rental company managing that, and Fintan's house was under their care as well. No one was occupying it at this time. So the only other item was my baby. I looked over at the red car, illuminated by the moonlight. I remembered the other night and how amazing it felt to ride along the moonlit Louisiana roads with Sookie, a sharp pang ringing through my heart in yearning, wishing that had been my true reality, wishing I could go back to that night and not this one, I told Pam…

"Sookie get's the Corvette."

Pam raised her brows, paused for a moment, and she asked me matter of factly…

"You love her don't you?"

I looked back at Pam in awkward hesitation, not about to give her an answer, pretending to misunderstand I answered…

"Of course, I don't know what I would do if she came home with any new scratches in her, and with your reckless driving record, I have to put Red's best interest at heart."

Pam smirked and she replied with snark…

"She was just about as forthcoming with me about her feelings for you as you are for her."

I creased my brows suddenly curious and I asked Pam…

"What exactly did you say to her? She threw me out just 15 minutes before and then she was back out spouting that stuff about being lost and confused?"

Pam raised her brows and she replied sitting down next to me on the front step…

"I found her crying her eyes out in the downstairs bathroom…I think she was more shaken up over the whole thing than anything. I told her she was silly to think you would actually murder your best friend. I told her that you and Godric were like brothers, you co-owned a bar, you had seen each other through the best of times and the worst of times, and I told her to look inside herself for the truth, I asked her if she could really see you as a murderer?"

I looked back at her, that melancholy haze creeping back in as I thought back to Godric and Pam continued…

"Then she told me that she didn't know what to believe, in her heart she knew you couldn't do that, even though she wasn't happy about what you did to Bill."

"I won't apologize for that." I replied stubbornly, and Pam looked back at me and nodded her head…

"I don't blame you."

We saw the lights go off in the kitchen and we realized it was getting late, so Pam pulled me inside with her…

"And here I was going to move back into my place tomorrow, I guess I have to put that off now." She mused and I looked back at her and flipped my eyes in annoyance over the whole goddamn thing. I wondered to myself if I would ever be free of this curse. How could I even mourn the man if I wasn't allowed to accept that his death was a suicide. When I saw it with my own two eyes but was still considered a suspect. I suddenly felt incredibly guilty for celebrating with Sookie today. Like I was mocking Godric's memory.

"I appreciate you staying." I finally replied once we got inside. Pam leaned in to hug me and she assured me…

"It's going to work out sweetie, they don't put innocent people in jail."

I knew they did but I didn't say anything, hugging her back, I nodded a thank you and wished Pam goodnight.

I paced my room all night. I thought about what my life had been like up until now, what I regretted, who would take care of Fintan, what I still wanted to do if I was truly cleared. Then I found my mind wandering back to Sookie. I wondered if she was mad at me because I hadn't seen or spoken to her since we were all out on the porch. I looked over my journal about 500 times wondering what Sookie saw. Keeping a journal was a suggestion given to me by Pam. When Godric first died, since I didn't want to seek professional help, Pam suggested that I get my thoughts and feelings out some other way. It took me a long time to actually write anything down, but when I finally forced my pencil to touch the paper, drawings came out, flashes, images I had seen in my dreams, in my subconscious. Which I think helped because gradually my nightmares had started to fade. I had never intended for anyone to read them, but apparently she had.

Strangely as much as I thought it would piss me off, it didn't bother me that Sookie read it. It bothered me more that we were in this predicament in the first place. I went over that night in my mind again and again, replaying it, trying to think about what I could have done differently, checked the gun, called 911 when I first smelled the gun powder, don't move the body, but in retrospect I knew I wasn't in the right frame of mind.

I think at about 4am I finally fell into a dreamless unsatisfying sleep that left me tossing and turning all night. It was the longest night of my life.

7am rolled around and I realized I had to get up and get ready to go. I packed all my things so that it would be easy for Adele to get rid of if I wasn't coming back, took a shower, got dressed and then I finally went out in search of my housemates, especially one Sookie Stackhouse. I found Pam and Adele in the kitchen talking over coffee, they offered me some but I wasn't very hungry. In fact I was sure if I swallowed anything right now it would just come back up. I looked around wondering where Sookie had gone and Adele explained that she had to run an errand, but was sure to be back before I left.

I gave Adele Mr. Cataliades contact information and explained what we had agreed upon for our legal course of action. I was surprised at how supportive she was. Pam was going to drive me to the station. Ironically though, the only thing weighing on my mind was Sookie, and I couldn't help it but wonder if she had decided to miss my departure on purpose. Maybe she didn't want to deal with me, maybe she changed her mind…

It was about 10 after 8 and I knew all the agonizing in the world wasn't going to help me. The fact of the matter was, I had to get going. Bill had most likely already filed his complaint by now, and I knew my window of time was fading by the second. With or without, saying goodbye to Sookie.

I wished she was here, I couldn't pretend I didn't. I felt like my last ray of hope had been snuffed out when I realized she wasn't coming. My heart sunk as I walked to Pam's car took one more look at the house feeling the emptiness that plagued me inside take over my body.

She wasn't coming. Our relationship was over, I thought swallowing, feeling the pits sink in my stomach all of the sudden. I didn't expect it to hurt as much as it did, the slow burning pain clamping down on my aching chest. But I tried to hold it in. I had to be strong. Pam was already seated inside the car, so I got in with a heavy heart.

Pam started up the car and backed out of the driveway, I took one last look in sadness, watching my life slip away from me as the house began to fade into the background and that's when Pam asked me if I heard that noise.

She turned down her radio, and then I thought I heard it too.

"_stop!" _The voice was muffled. I looked in the rear view mirror, angling it to the other side, the cemetery side, and then I saw Sookie running after the car.

My hope returned and I put my hand on Pam's arm and asked her…

"Pam stop!"

She put the breaks on and within a split second I had my seat belt off and the door open. My heart was pounding as my feet hit the gravel driveway and I ran towards her.

"Eric!" She cried again, this time I could hear the emotion in her voice. Finally we reached each other half way between the lawn and the cemetery and Sookie flew into my arms.

It was like a culmination of everything fighting to come out when she looked up at me with her sad and melancholy eyes. I was overcome by the urge to smash my lips down upon her, and so I did. The heat followed coursing from my body into hers. I didn't want to stop kissing her, needing her more now than I had ever needed another human being, my hand held her face and we locked lips for what felt like a lifetime. I wanted to stay in this moment forever. Everything was just….I don't have words to describe it, only it was like everything clicked together.

My thumbs brushed over her cheek and I felt tears running down her face. When I realized she was crying I pulled back and looked at her in question, my anxiety creeping back.

"I didn't want to miss you." She exclaimed breathlessly tears still flowing, and I tried to wipe them away and shake my head because I didn't want her to cry. And she began to explain.

"I went to talk to Bill this morning (I tensed up immediately at the mention of Bill, allowing Sookie to continue, my gaze met hers…) but he wouldn't change his mind, I tried to stay and convince him, but he wouldn't budge…And I was worried I might be too late…" She choked out a sob.

I could tell she was starting to lose it and I brought her back into my arms and held her just needing to be close to her, to soak up every last moment of precious time we still had together.

"It's okay, it will be okay." I don't know why I said it, I didn't believe it, but I wanted to make her feel better. Clenching her shirt in my hands and she nodded, replying…

"I know."

I pulled her in for another heart wrenching kiss that caused the liquid energy from my body to flow into hers. I didn't know how it was possible to go from a complete black abyss of despair to cloud nine, but it was possible with Sookie. She stopped kissing me and pressed her forehead to my cheek, clenching my shirt now as well and then she whispered…

"**I love you**."

There was a humming all over my body, as the words echoed in my head, you see I had waited so long for her to hear her say those words. I had been afraid before to tell her how I felt before because I didn't want to scare her off, but now, now that she had finally said them and I realized I wasn't dreaming, my god, I wasn't dreaming, I felt my pulse start to race and I gasped in happy relief…

"I love you too."

She smiled, and then I smiled and we kissed again. I loved her, I loved her. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but I knew I didn't have much time. So I inhaled her like my last breath of air needing to capture this moment in my mind and remember it forever, to get me through this battle.

I finally replied while we took a moment to catch our breaths …

"We really have a knack for bad timing don't we?"

She smiled faintly, both of us knew the seriousness of the situation, but I could tell she was relieved for my attempt to lighten things up, and she nodded her head and agreed….

"Yes, we do."

She hugged me again and I knew she didn't want to let go just like me. I assured her…

"Ill call you when I know more."

She looked back at me and nodded, meeting my gaze worriedly, Sookie replied…

"I wish I could go with you."

"I wish you could too, but you have to work." I answered trying to think practically, never daring to admit that I needed her like a child needs his favorite blanket to fall asleep, burying my nose in her hair, pulling her warm body back to mine. I couldn't believe this was happening now, part of me dreading what was to come and the other part screaming for joy that she loved me.

"Eric honey, I'm sorry but we have to get going." Pam replied gently approaching us from behind.

"You'll be home in no time, I just know it." Sookie whispered trying to stay positive as she looked up at me with those endearing eyes which caused me to melt right there on the spot. Bending down to kiss her one last time, making this one count, I felt the blood rush to my head, and my tongue swirled around hers, both of us gasping in agony when I had to pull away and I concluded in a whisper…

"I won't say goodbye."

Offering Sookie a small smile, because with her here, I felt hope again and she replied with that same half smile…

"Neither will I."

My hand left hers, forced to turn around and walk back to the car. I could already feel the burning friction as I pulled away from her, my body screaming in pain, but I knew that my courage and faith had been restored.

xxxx

The drive to Shreveport was mostly a quiet one. Pam who was usually Chatty Cathy didn't have much to say but a few words of encouragement. I could tell she was scared too, although shed never admit it.

I knew I would be awhile, I saw Mr. Cataliades pull up around the same time and I gave Pam a quick hug and a brief…

"Wish me luck."

Before I got out and walked in with my lawyer.

It was a very long morning and an even longer afternoon. When I was finally done with questioning, I learned that it wasn't the last witness that screwed me over, but what I did to Bill. They kept asking me for a motive, all I could tell them was roughly the same thing I told Adele, we got in a fight over a girl, and I didn't trust his behavior around the girl so I took action. Mr. Cataliades told me I had to give them more, but I couldn't in good conscience say that Bill raped Sookie because to be honest, I didn't know what happened exactly. I knew the moment I started lying it would come back to fuck me in the ass, so I told them all I could.

Since Bill pressed charges, that meant I was spending the night in jail. I figured as much. Fortunately since they had done so much prep work for this case, and had all but closed it yesterday, they were able to get a hold of a judge, and I was going to have my hearing on Monday. Unfortunately, that meant I had to spend the entire weekend in jail. They didn't want to waste any more taxpayer time and money on this and seemed set on closing this case whether they believed my innocence or not.

Mr. Cataliades called Pam and she said she would be there for the hearing and she would see if Sookie would like to come with as well.

I just wanted to hear her voice. I had one phone call before they made me hit the cages, so I called Sookie's new phone thinking hopefully she would be done with work by now. I let it ring wondering if she didn't have it turned on, and then to my relief she picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's me." I replied awkwardly not really wanting to make this call from the county jail, but I really didn't have a choice and she replied…

"Oh Eric, thank god, I didn't recognize the number"

"Yeah sorry about that…" I replied feeling even guiltier now. It had taken me some time to come to terms with what happened myself, but I didn't even think about how this affected Sookie.

"I've been thinking about you all day…" She confessed with concern.

I nodded wishing I could say the same…

"How did it go?" She asked me with a hopeful desperation, but I couldn't find the strength to tell her, not wanting to crush her right away, I thought we could just talk for awhile, but unfortunately Sookie was smart enough to figure out for herself…

"Why aren't you calling me from your phone?"

"Sookie." I replied softly, wishing more than anything I could be there with her now instead of having to make this torturous phone call.

"Oh god, Eric? Are you in jail?"

I swallowed not wanting to disappoint her, but I had to tell her the truth…

"Are you sitting down?"

"Tell me what happened, all of it!" She exclaimed her voice more tense now. I could feel the tension rolling off her over the airwaves, desperately wishing I could go to her and take it all away….

"It's true, I have to spend the weekend here…"

I could hear Sookie letting in a sharp intake of breath on the other end, trying to backtrack to make her feel better, I explained…

"I will find out Monday, my hearing with the judge is at 1pm…I spoke with my lawyer, he thinks I have a good chance of getting off, I just have to sit tight here and try to weather the storm while it passes…"

"Eric?"

She whimpered, and I clenched the end of my receiver, desperately wishing I could go to her right now…

"I'm sorry Sookie, I never meant to put you through this, you or your Grandmother…"

"I just need some time, okay? Maybe I can come and see you tomorrow." She replied wearily.

I knew it wasn't much, but it made me feel loads better, because honestly, it might be the last time I got to see her and talk to her before I was carted of to some prison, and I answered honestly…

"Id like that."

"You can have visitors can't you?"

"I…I think so."

Talking to Sookie was hard for me, possibly even harder than turning myself into the police.

"I could kill Bill." She replied sharply and I nodded my head and replied…

"I know, but don't, we can't both be stuck behind bars." I added trying to lighten the somber mood, but I knew it was hopeless.

"This is my fault, if I hadn't gone sneaking around on Bill, maybe none of this would have ever happened," Sookie confessed.

"I don't regret a minute of it." I replied sternly and she sighed into her phone pausing for a moment and then confessed quietly…

"Neither do I."

"I love you." I concluded, knowing there wasn't much more to be said.

"I know."

We said our goodbyes, and then the guard led me over to my cell where I had no other choice but to sit here and await my fate.

I couldn't help but think if Love was all I had to give her, that wouldn't amount to much. Not that Id ever want her to go back to that ass hole Bill Compton, but maybe she would be better off with a good honest man, someone who didn't have a knack for trouble everywhere he turned. Maybe Sookie was right when she accepted that date with her boss. After all, what more could I offer her if I didn't even have my freedom?

xxxxx

_SPOV_

I clicked off my phone shrugging off my sweater as I made my way back into the house. I felt queasy again, like I did last night, figuring I had to be coming down with something. Which was truly the cherry on my Sunday. First Eric, now this.

I saw Pam's car pull into the driveway, and swallowed knowing I had to brace myself to talk to her about Eric. I knew he was just sugar coating things over the phone. I feared what would happen next. Turning to go fill up the kettle to make some tea, I set the pot down on the stove and lit the burner. The numbers on the burner dial turned blurry and I heard Pam come in.

"Hello." She announced, and I replied...

"In here."

But when I saw Pam, it was like she was walking in slow motion towards me. I couldn't hear the words coming out of her mouth and I suddenly felt very dizzy and tired. I think she said my name, and I stepped out towards her thinking I needed to find the closest bathroom, because this had to be a sign that I surely was going to hurl…

"I need to..."

I mumbled, and then I felt my knees buckle, collapsing down on the kitchen floor below me. The last thing I saw was Pam's gray suede pumps approaching me as my cheek pressed against the cool tile and then the world went dark.


	19. Chapter 19

**AN**: So I'm sorry, this chapter is short and sweet and a little late. I couldn't get around that. But I will make it up to you in the next chapter. I hope you enjoy it nevertheless, oh and please dont be too hard on our girl Sook. She is going through alot at the moment, so she deserves some slack. ;) Thanks again to all who have read and reviewed. I tried to reply to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, but if I missed you, Im sorry, and thanks for the review. Hope you enjoy!

**Chapter 19-When Doves Cry**

I couldn't remember much about last night, only when I woke up, I was laying in my bed feeling groggy as hell. My Gran was sitting there with a pile of knitting yarn in her lap and then she noticed my eyes were open.

She set down her knitting needles and came over to sit next to me, brushing her fingers through my hair gently. I looked back at her as she spoke…

"How do you feel darling?"

Not quite sure what the answer to that question should be. I looked out the window to get my bearings back, finding it was day, my eyes glanced at my alarm clock and I noted it was 11am. A lot of time had passed since yesterday evening.

I met my Gran's gaze once more and I nodded, remembering now…

"One minute, I wasn't feeling well, and the next, I was heading for the bathroom. I just felt so dizzy."

"You fainted. Came too about 20 minutes later mumbling something about little red riding hood and then you were out again."

I creased my brows in disbelief unable to remember any of that, feeling embarrassed…

"Sorry about all the trouble I caused." I replied and she shook her head…

"You did no such thing."

My Gran got up and took a thermometer out of the bathroom and proceeded to place it in my mouth. For some reason I felt like I was 5 again and she asked me as I clamped down on the thermometer…

"Id be willing to wager you didn't eat at all yesterday did you?" I thought back trying to remember, and realized it was true, shaking my head and she asked again…

"Probably didn't drink much either?"

I shook my head again, knowing that was irresponsible of me but I wasn't in the mood to eat, for obvious reasons.

She sighed and replied…

"You aren't going to do any good if you don't take care of yourself." My Gran assured me and I nodded knowing she was right, even though I didn't want to admit it.

She took the thermometer out of my mouth and read it with her glasses on.

"As I suspected…98 degrees."

"That's good right?" I asked her hopeful and she nodded her head.

I smiled and then my Gran replied…

"Yes, that's perfectly normal, but I want you to go see your doctor just incase, when was the last time you had a check up?"

I shook my head unsure, and then I remembered I was in the hospital briefly while my Gran was in Haiti, but that wasn't really by my choice, and there was no way in hell I was telling her about that. I did go a few months back for birth control before Bill and I had decided to engage in intercourse, but I didn't see my regular doctor. I was too embarrassed.

"I haven't seen Dr. Larrabee in awhile." I answered bending the truth a little. I met her gaze trying not to look guilty, but what could I say, my Gran was almost always right as much as I hated to admit it.

"We have a history of diabetes in our family you know and dizziness due to low blood sugar is one of the signs."

I creased my brows not liking the sound of that and she assured me…

"Don't worry baby girl, its just a suggestion, I'm sure it's nothing, but you do need to eat something."

I scrunched up my nose at the thought of any kind of food and she replied…

"I know, I had Pam make you some oatmeal, that should be easy on your stomach, but before any of that I want you to drink some water."

Her mention of Pam reminded me of seeing her yesterday, and by extension, Eric. An avalanche of emotion stirring inside me as the events from yesterday unfolded in my mind.

I nodded; sighing inwardly I looked down at my hands trying not to get wrapped up in my worried thoughts any more. My Gran was right, they wouldn't do me any good. But nevertheless she took note of my concern.

"I thought I said no worryin? (She challenged me calling me out on my look of anguish and my Gran continued…) You just need to focus on you now and getting better."

She handed me the glass of water and I took a small sip as my Gran continued to chatter away…

"And I have good news. (She smiled brightly and I really hoped it was good news and not just my Gran trying to cheer me up with silly sediments.) I spoke to Sheriff Dearborn and he said he was going to put in a good word for Eric at his hearing."

I nodded offering her a small smile, thinking at least that was something, but it still gave me a sick feeling deep down. I couldn't deny that my stomach was still tied in knots over it all. And then she caught me off guard and asked me point blank…

"So you and Eric are dating now?"

Dating wasn't really what I would call it, I thought.

I bit my lip feeling awkward, not really having spoke much to my Gran before about my relationships, but I didn't want to lie to her and nodded…

"Yeah, sort of." My lips curved slightly, and my Gran nodded, she paused for a moment. I could tell she was trying to find her words and then finally she put her hand on my arm gently, and replied…

"What does sort of dating mean? You have to forgive me, I'm not up on today's hip modern lingo."

I flipped my eyes up, sure my face had turned bright pink because it was burning up and I shook my head and sat up suddenly feeling awkward because this wasn't a subject I felt that confident in. I mean did I have feelings for Eric? Yes, of course. My skin flushed again and I covered my red face partially when I remembered I told him I loved him yesterday. Oh God. But where was this going? He might be looking at a lifetime behind bars and where did that leave us?

"I don't know, we have been on a few official dates I guess, some not so official..."

She raised a brow and looked back at me, I quickly took another sip of water hoping this subject would pass because I wasn't comfortable talking about it. I mean my boyfriend was currently in jail right now. I felt like I belonged on one of those Lifetime movies of the week.

"I'm glad you found someone after Bill." My Gran proclaimed. Her lips curved up slightly and she put her hand on my shoulder.

I nodded, and then she continued…

"And I think Eric is wonderful, maybe a little rough around the edges, but he really is a good kid, despite his very bad luck."

I found myself smiling faintly, realizing my Gran knew him much better than I thought she did. Although if Eric were here right now Id slug him for telling her about his house arrest situation and not me. That really did piss me off. Fortunately for him he was conveniently under a lot of outside pressure so I decided to cut him some slack, but if he ever did that again Id kick him in the nuts.

"If I ever had any regrets, I wish I could have taken things slower during my courting years, it goes by so fast, before you know it you are saddled down with a husband and kids, not that I ever regret having any, or being married, but there were many times I lay awake at night wondering, what if?"

I nodded understanding what she was getting at, and she did have a point…

She smiled and patted my arm and shook her head replying…

"I don't ever want to meddle in your love life, lord knows my mother meddled enough in mine, but if I could go back in time and tell anything to the younger version of myself, it would be to stop and smell the roses for a bit, enjoy everything life has to offer, it all passes by in a blink of an eye."

I smiled and nodded appreciating her advice. She always did have a deep understanding for life and making the most of it. She was a lot like Eric, I noted. Growing up my Gran had an uncanny way of staying calm in chaotic moments and waving all our troubles away. I wish I could stay as level headed as she had been, but I was terribly thankful I had her in moments like this. I had a feeling I was going to need her a lot through this whole thing.

"It's good advice." I finally replied agreeing with her. She handed me a multivitamin tablet on my bed stand and I took a sip followed by the tablet, and then my Gran asked me

"You're on the pill right?"

I nearly choked on the tablet, and she quickly patted my back…

"Oh dear, I'm sorry darling, I shouldn't have asked you that just as you were taking a drink."

My face colored bright red, and I instantly thought of the night before last. Oh god, what if my Gran heard us? I would be mortified if she had. I coughed a couple times and then drank another swig of water to finish.

And I finally nodded my head…

"Um, yes."

My Gran smiled. I wasn't used to talking to her about boys, let alone sex, and birth control, so this came as surprise that she seemed to be so at ease with the topic. She smiled and got up announcing…

"That's great. Ill have Pam bring you up your oatmeal in a little bit then."

I nodded and smiled faintly, still not quite sure what I should be feeling right now, embarrassment, worry, mortification, relief?

"It's okay Gran, Ill get up, I feel fine now." I answered thinking a shower would help me feel better, then hopefully my body would follow. I went over to my dresser to prove to her that I was perfectly fine. My Gran smiled and concluded…

"If I were 40 years younger I might even try to wrestle him away from you myself." She winked at me and I couldn't help but smile, at the thought of my Gran gaming for Eric like one of those girls down at Merlottes, already feeling better because strangely, she helped to take my mind off the black abyss of worry that plagued my mind as of late.

xxxxx

Thirty minutes later things weren't much better. My Gran was out watering her garden when I had the pleasure of a confrontation from Pam. One would have thought she would have eased up on me a bit after what happened last night, but apparently she was too anxious to give a girl a day off.

"Sookie I need to talk to you about Eric."

Pam began as I sat down with my bowl of oatmeal. Pam had cut up some peaches and sprinkled cinnamon on top and I crinkled my nose unsure if that would improve the taste or lessen, thankfully it wasn't that bad.

I looked back at her and replied with a hint of sarcasm my defenses rising because I didn't want to get another lecture on practicing safe sex...

"You're starting early today."

But she didn't take the hint and sat down with her cup of coffee in hand. I thought it odd that she just held it as if she was clenching the cup rather than drinking from it. She paused for a moment waiting till she had my eye contact and then she replied...

"I think he's going to need your help."

"Well I already told him Id see him today so why doesn't he just ask me himself?" I wondered out loud taking another spoonful of oatmeal. But Pam wasn't smiling, smirking, or even blinking. It actually kind of creeped me out, and then she finally replied...

"Because Eric is too proud to ask you himself."

I creased my brows sure I wasn't going to like this and I met her gaze in question.

"Honey, I spoke with his lawyer yesterday, Mr. Cataliades. He thinks the judge is going to ask Eric why he attacked Bill. Eric wont tell them anything other than Bill was jealous of you two, but if they think he just lashes out like this to random people, well it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to think he could attack Godric."

I took a deep breath having a feeling where this was going shaking my head in denial I replied…

"That's stretching things a bit don't you think?"

I replied as the heavy lead weighted emotions stirred around in my chest like tumbleweed and Pam continued...

"Sookie, if they don't know the real reason why Eric attacked Bill, he could go away for a very long time. He needs permission from you to tell them, or better yet, he needs you to tell them what happened. Sookie this could be his only chance."

Pam's eyes were pleading and if I didn't know her as well as I did I wouldn't think her capable of possessing the fear she held behind her eyes. But it was there.

"Pam, I don't know how many times we have to go over this, but nothing happened."

I replied calmly holding my ground.

She looked at me for a minute and then she slapped her hand down on the table, which startled me and then she replied...

"That's bullshit Sookie! You know it, I know it, and the whole town knows it!"

I was able to hold back a flinch as she stared me down, and then her pager went off and Pam cursed to herself pulling the pager out and looking at it...

"Fuck."

She sighed and exclaimed...

"This is the clinic, I have to take this."

Pam used her cell to call in and I watched her carefully as she paced back and forth, her heels clicking on the kitchen floor tile. Though secretly I wanted to get out of this house like a tiger trapped in a tiny cage.

Thankfully Pam must have realized her defeat when she hung up sighed and exclaimed...

"I have to go in and meet with a patient, but can we pick up where we left off when I get back? We really need to establish some sort of game plan before Monday."

I met her gaze leerily not quite sure how this was going to go over with Eric. With everything looming between us we were back to this thing again?

But she wouldn't leave without confirmation from me and I finally nodded my head.

"Good. Don't go anywhere." She concluded and then clicked her heels off.

I knew I had a few hours to kill before Pam returned. My Gran wasn't going to let me near anything inside or outside that could qualify as productive activity, not after last night. And as I paced the house all I could think of was my growing worry for Eric. At first I didn't know if what Pam said was true. Maybe she was just being dramatic, but then I feared that maybe Pam was right. Would they really lock Eric up for good? I began to loose faith in the American justice system with that notion.

I thought about going to talk to Bill again, maybe if I could persuade him to drop the charges everything would clear itself up. I really didn't want to go back to that night, but maybe I could get him to change his mind, he owed me for not taking him down into the gutter with me when it happened, he owed me that much. I had erased that night from my mind forever and I certainly wasn't planning on going back. It was time to make a clean break.

I had just dialed his number when I felt the nausea pass over me. Trying to take a deep breath, I waited for Bill to pick up, tapping my foot on the porch, and that's when I felt the pressure in my stomach rise up to the surface.

I heard Bills voice answer on the other end as I dropped the phone, my body was no longer under my control and I leaned against the railing as the storm within me fought to come out. I looked down and found my entire breakfast covering my Gran's beautiful rhododendrons planted in the ground below. Cringing at the sick bitter taste in my mouth, I looked down grossed out once more by the hideous mess I made. Hearing Bills worried voice on the other end of the receiver…

"_Sookie? Sookie are you okay?"_

I picked it up, told him I had to go, and then quickly grabbed the hose to clean off the flowers.

I realized shortly after that maybe I should go in to see my doctor. If it was a bug maybe she could prescribe me something. I so did not need this extra problem right now, so I was going to take all the help I could get. I could deal with Bill after.

It was Saturday, but lucky for me the clinic just started staying open on Saturdays till 1pm, due to the suffering economy and all those working single mothers, according to the local paper, Saturday was one of the busiest days at Bon Temps Family Medical.

I got in to see Dr. Larrabee almost right away, which was shocking. I didn't really want to be spending my Saturday sitting in the doctors office but at least this helped take my mind of other much more consequential things.

I had given my blood and my doctor came back in with a smile on her face. Dr. Larrabee was always a little too cheerful for her own good, and I sat there nervously awaiting the verdict. She sat down next to me, crossed her legs, looked over her charts and she replied musingly...

"Well you definitely don't have the flu or food poisoning, and your blood sugar levels are just fine so its not diabetes..."

I looked back at her in confusion, thinking if it wasn't those things, then what was it. I started to freak out and I asked her in a panic...

"It's not cancer is it?"

She smiled and shook her head. I suddenly wished I could wipe that cheerful smile off her face and force her to spit it out. She must have read my thoughts because I don't think I would forget the next three words for as long as I lived...

"Sookie, you're pregnant!"

I think in that moment I heard the sound of a million crystal vases shattering in unison.

"What?" I croaked thinking surely she had to be kidding. I suddenly felt like I was drowning and she continued in what I could only assume was an attempt to snap me out of it...

"You are going to have a baby honey..."

Her smile was bright, but all I could feel was shock, the world was silent, there was a sudden ringing in my ears, my mouth agape frozen in the exact spot it was 5 seconds ago and it wasn't going anywhere, I was stunned, like one of those electrocuted deer's or something, finally trying to wrap my mind around this preposterous concept I argued...

"No I'm not, I cant be...(I continued to shake my head, trying to keep my breathing level and I assured her...) I'm on the pill, I have been taking the pill religiously for the last 2 months, this isn't possible, you have to check again! Please!"

My eyes begged with her and her smile finally faded as she registered the complete panic I was feeling at the moment.

She put her hand on my arm and she assured me...

"Sookie, obviously this was unplanned, but accidents happen, nothing is fool proof when it comes to birth control, the only sure way of not getting pregnant is abstinence."

Sure now she tells me. I thought bitterly, my head still spinning. I looked at her feeling more lost than I had in my entire life unable to even grasp what this meant. What was I going to do? How was I going to support this child on a bar maids salary? How was I going to get more time off to even take care of it? How was I going to tell my Gran? I knew she would be so disappointed. And the cherry on that sundae-Who the fuck was my baby's father?

I was sure if it was possible my body would have spontaneously combusted from the atomic cloud of worry surrounding and choking the life out of me at the moment, but somehow my flesh remained in tact.

I looked at Dr. Larrabee again in horror thinking, I was being punished. For my unfaithfulness to Bill, I was being punished! For all the terrible things I had done, I was being punished. I knew it would catch up with me. First Eric, now this! I didn't think I could take much more putting my hand up to my face in dizziness and Dr. Larrabee stood up suddenly and announced...

"I'm going to get you some of my free pre natal vitamin samples, Sookie I know it seems scary now. I have two little rug rats and I was terrified when I found out I was first pregnant, but I promise you it gets better, you just cant let the anxiety rule your life. You are thinking for two now, so remember everything you do or feel, the baby feels too."

I looked up at her feeling a wave of anger all of the sudden and I stood up with her, shaking my head I answered no longer caring about politeness, I was too fucking freaked out...

"I really don't give a shit, I'm getting a second opinion, this just cant be possible."

I huffed and grabbed my purse shoving past her into the hallway.

"Sookie, wait, we need to schedule an appointment with an OBGYN, there are some important things you need to know!" She called after me but I wasn't hearing any of it. My mind had gone deaf from all the spinning.

I didn't know what to do, what to think where to go, whom to talk to. So I went to the drug store to buy a pregnancy test. I was determined to prove Dr. Larrabee wrong. Even though in the back of my mind I had a fear that she was right, I had to see it for myself.

On the way there my cell rang. It was Bill again, I didn't want to talk to him, and so I ignored his call and turned my phone off. Once inside the store, I made a beeline for the pregnancy tests. There were far too many to choose from and I was still in shock so I just grabbed 3 different kinds.

I was almost to the end of the aisle making my way towards the cash register when I bumped into someone. To my horror it was someone I really wasn't ready to face right now.

"Sookie?"

"Bill, what are you doing here?"

I croaked, trying to shove the pregnancy tests behind my back, but to my horror the one that must have got away slipping through my fingers down to the floor was now grasped tightly in Bills hand as he looked back at me in a questioning manner.

"What is this for?"

I was sure if I had a mirror at the moment my face would have drained white, meeting his gaze I shook my head not wanting him to get the wrong idea and I replied...

"It's nothing, it's for a friend."

"Tara?" He asked and I nodded feeling slightly guilty, I looked down at the others in my hand and then back at Bill in an attempt to hold my ground, but he simply asked me...

"Then why don't I believe you?"

I swallowed suddenly feeling the nausea again and I shook my head, needing to get rid of him and rid of him fast I blurted out...

"You can believe whatever you want Bill, but the fact of the matter is that as usual you have no damn clue what you are talking about!"

"Sookie!" But I didn't want to deal with Bill right now and I turned my back on him

"Sookie, don't do this alone!"

I heard him call after me as I shoved past him and out the door.

I was able to hold it in until I got in my car and started to drive away.

About a mile out of downtown Bon Temps, I finally had to pull over to purge myself of all the sickness stored inside me. There was no more denying it now. I didn't need those pregnancy tests to say it. I knew there was a little life growing inside me. A life I wasn't ready for.

I wondered how the fates could be so cruel.

I had waited 27 years to give away my virginity. I had played my life by the book, planned out everything meticulously even up to the night I would lose my virginity with constant debate and discussion. I had always prided myself on being a good Southern Christian. I was a good girl, not promiscuous by any means (before Eric at least.) This wasn't happening, it couldn't be. What was I going to do? I had never felt so alone in my life. The panic inside me was screaming to escape as my eyes blurred and my car began to swerve.

I broke down right there afterwards on the side of the road crouching beside my car gazing at the mess my life had become. I didn't know what to do. I wasn't married, I had a piss poor job, and my Gran wasn't going to be able to help with a baby. Not to mention, if it was Bill's, which it most likely was, Eric surely wouldn't want anything to do with it. With everything going on in his life at the moment even I knew that would be the straw that broke the camels back, nor would he want anything to do with me after he found out.

All those feelings I had for him, yesterday, it all seemed like such a distant memory today. Because after all, what do the damned really say to the damned? 

_What was I going to do?_

A car passed by on the side of the road and I figured I better get back inside before I make more of a spectacle. But I couldn't find the energy or the will power to move my hands or my feet once I was back in the drivers seat. I didn't know what to do. Frozen in shock. I was pregnant. I was pregnant with Bills baby. My life as I knew it was over. The only thing I could do, was to…

Close my eyes and pray for a miracle.


	20. Chapter 20

**AN**: Okay so first off, to those of you who watch True Blood, was Eric not just fuckawesome last night? Sighs, he is just so yummy and I totally would never leave that poor man standing on my porch as long as Sookie did, lol. Crazy girl. So anyway, he was definately part of the inspiration for this chapter. :D And, I got this chapter up a day early, so hope you dont mind. Thanks again to all the wonderful people who keep my creative juices flowing by continuing to read and review this story. I promised some of you no more curve balls. So for the time being (translation, next 2 chapters), Sook and E just get to deal with the hand they have been dealt, which should be more than enough angst for both of them to wade through for awhile. This chapter might come with a warning, you possibly may not want to read it at work or in a place where there are alot of people around. ;) That's all Im saying. So I hope you enjoy and thanks again for your continued support. I love you guys! xoxo

**Chapter 20-Butterflies and Hurricanes**

_EPOV_

"Northman, you got a visitor!"

I heard the guard announce from the other room, standing up I looked on questioning who it was, in the back of my mind wondering if it was Sookie. It had been a long night; a very tireless night because I had a dream that something had happened to her, something terrible and I couldn't get to her because I was stuck here in this cage. I had never felt so trapped in my life. I hoped it was her so she could ease my tired conscience.

I heard heels click down the cell block, recognizing the familiar gait instantly realizing who it was before I saw her, I walked up to the bars and wrapped my hands around them…

"Hi Sugar."

Pam greeted me with a sweet smile. It seemed forced however and I suddenly had a feeling something was wrong. She had mentioned yesterday that she would be coming by today with Sookie, who obviously wasn't here right now.

"Hi Pam." I replied trying not to jump to conclusions, as she leaned up to the bars to kiss my cheeks.

When she stopped for a moment to look at me I asked her...

"To what do I owe this special visit?"

But Pam simply waved her hand to the guard, signaling him to come over. I looked over at him in question wondering what he had to do with this.

"I'm getting you out darling, I just posted bail."

My head snapped back to her in surprise because I knew exactly how much the bail was, it was too much for Pam, and I shook my head and refused stepping back...

"No Pam, you cant, it's not that bad, I can wait it out for 2 more days."

She scoffed at me as the guard took out his keys and unlocked the bars and Pam replied sternly...

"You aren't going to get anything accomplished sitting in jail and right now, you need to focus."

"I can't accept…" I replied still refusing to step out, but Pam reached in yanked on my arm proving her superhuman strength and pulled me out replying...

"Yes you can, and you will."

I creased my brows, but she clearly wasn't taking 'no' for an answer, so I had no other choice but to follow her out and collect my things insisting...

"I'm paying you back for this."

"Yes, I know, I'm looking forward to it immensely." She smiled at me smugly and I rolled my eyes.

Pam could have saved her money, I wasn't opposed to sitting in jail for another night, hell I served in the armed forces, the Shreveport county jail was like staying at the Wyndham compared to the Gulf, but I suspected she had an ulterior motive for arranging my temporary freedom and once we got into her car, I realized I was right.

Pam had pulled onto the highway, by now the air conditioning was running so she rolled up her windows, switched off her CD player, and turned to look at me.

"We need to talk." She announced.

I smirked at her thinking that was an ironic statement coming from her and I replied antagonistically...

"I thought that was what we were doing?"

"Eric, I'm being serious." She looked back on the road for a moment and I replied in challenge…

"So talk then."

She pursed her lips and looked out the window for a moment and then back at me, finally replying after a moment of silence...

"I think you need to talk to Sookie about her alleged rape."

I looked away instantly thinking about how I didn't want to talk about this right now, and she remarked...

"We both know you need her statement to win this."

I knew she was going to play with the hard balls first, I don't know how, but I just did. Gritting my teeth I thought about how, I didn't want to put Sookie in this position, she had been through a lot lately, and then Pam put her hand over mine and she explained...

"I attempted to talk to Sookie this morning but I'm not getting through to her, I even tried to phone her a few times this afternoon, left her a message telling her I was going to see you, but I'm pretty sure she is screening her calls right now in a last ditch effort to avoid me like the plague."

My pulse rate picked up anxiously at mention of Pam confronting Sookie earlier this morning, for some reason bemused before the reality of Sookie's actions had really sunk in and I replied with a small smirk.

"That didn't go well for you, I take it?" I asked. She tossed her eyes up and shook her head.

"The only person who is going to get through to her right now darling, is you."

I knew she was right, even though I didn't want to admit it. Sookie was stubborn, just like I was, which made us a lethal combination. But in truth, confronting her about Bills rape it was the last thing in the world I'd ever want to do right now. I half considered asking Pam if she wouldn't mind taking me back to jail. I was hopeful she could still get a refund and I could keep my sanity, but I knew this was a done deal, and I didn't have much of a choice in the matter by this point.

I toyed with the idea in my head and then figured I could take advantage of the borrowed time to research my other options as well, and finally I replied...

"I will take your advice under consideration."

Pam pursed her lips again and shook her head concluding...

"Good, cause Eric..."

She wanted me to look at her and my blue eyes met hers in question and then Pam answered...

"This is the rest of your life we are talking about, don't fuck around because you were too chicken shit to ask for help."

I glared back at her because Pam definitely knew how to push my buttons and looked out at the road in anxiousness as we drove on.

xxxxx

We returned to Bon Temps shortly there after noting how different it felt now to be here.

I was no longer the handy man who was renting a room from an old woman and her grand daughter. I was either about to become a condemned criminal or granted my freedom, which would allow me to go back to my life in Shreveport.

Either way the cookie crumbled, there was no going back to the way things were now. That little notion actually made me quite sad. I didn't know what to think about what this meant, but before I could say anything, Adele discovered we were back. I said hello to Adele and she greeted me happily with a kiss and a hug welcoming me home. I only hoped Sookie would feel the same because we had a lot to discuss. I couldn't help but think her unwillingness to talk to Pam this morning didn't bode well for my chances at persuading her to help me.

Adele said Sookie had gone out to run some errands, but I couldn't help but wonder if she was trying to avoid me just because she didn't want to talk about Bill? If that was the case we definitely had a problem. I didn't like that unsettling feeling stirring through me.

I was typically a confident man, but when it came to Sookie, I just didn't know what to expect. Yesterday she told me she loved me but maybe she realized it was a mistake today.

Pam announced that she had a report to type up and would be spending the afternoon in the kitchen on her laptop. I took that as code for Pam would act, as a guard dog to make sure Sookie couldn't get away should she come back.

I honestly needed to clear my head just a little and not jump right into things. So Adele of course insisted I stay with them, but I had to deal with things at home. I thought it might be the last time I had the chance to drop by, and although I stopped my mail and my paper, I had this picture of a mountain of letters and newspapers piled up on my doorstep. So I respectfully declined her offer. Once tonight's housing arrangements were determined, I told them I was going to take a shower, change, and pack before I dealt with finding Sookie.

About 90 minutes later I had just finished folding the last of my clothing, now dressed in a clean pair of jeans and my favorite gray tee when I saw Sookie make her way up the driveway. I felt the butterflies swarm around like an army of locusts in my chest and walked out and into the foyer leading to the front door holding my breath in anticipation as the car crunched along the loose gravel. For some reason unbeknownst to me, my palms instantly started to sweat and I heard her turn off her ignition and close the car door.

However, she didn't go up the stairs towards the porch like I had expected her to, instead she veered to the right. I followed her with my eyes as she made her way around the house and out of my line of sight, questioning where she was going. I heard Pam step out and she asked me if that was Sookie. I replied under my breath…

"Yeah I think so."

And then I went out in search of her. I could feel Pam's eyes burning into my back as I exited the front door. I could see Sookie's blonde pony tail as she made her way off towards the cemetery and I frowned in question, not quite sure what she was doing, but one thing I did note was she certainly wasn't getting ready to pay me a visit or come into the house to find Pam.

She had taken the pathway that winded through the cemetery. I curved around several large oak trees. So I had no other choice but to follow, suddenly feeling like Alice chasing after her white rabbit, I had no idea where I was going, but I knew I had to follow her.

I lost her for a moment, glancing out among all the aged tombstones; the wind began to blow gently from the east side causing the Spanish moss to dance. I turned around to face the gentle breeze, and that's when I saw her sitting near a large willow tree next to several gravestones.

I swallowed, quieting my steps for some reason I didn't want to intrude. I hadn't noticed before but she must have been carrying some flowers in her hand because they were lying next to her on the soft grass next to the tombstone.

I stood there for a moment just watching her curiously. She was talking softly and I couldn't hear her, not sure I wanted to interrupt. But when there was a silent pause, I finally worked up the nerve to approach her…

"Hey." I replied in greeting, obviously catching her by surprise, she practically fell back when she turned to look at me…

She slowly and cautiously stood up to face me, I thought I saw her swallow and clench her hands, as if she was nervous.

"Hi." She finally replied softly. She looked to me and then back at the house and remarked…

"You're back."

I wasn't sure if it was a question or a statement but I simply nodded my head. I couldn't deny that I was hoping for a warmer reception from her than I had been given. Especially when I took a step towards her and she shuffled her feet back nervously.

"So…that's good news right?" She asked looking down at the bouquet of flowers as if she was debating on picking them up. Perhaps to toss at me, I didn't know.

"It depends on who is asking."

She glanced back at me a mixture of pain and fear behind her red eyes and I knew something was up. And she replied in almost a whisper I could barely hear...

"I'm asking."

She lifted her gaze to meet mine and I noticed how much older she suddenly looked. Like she had lived through a lifetime in the last day. I felt guilty because I didn't want to put her through this, but at the same time, I wanted to shake her and ask her why she was acting so distant right now, why she didn't bother to pick up her phone and talk to Pam.

"Yes, Pam put up some money for my bail but I have to go back Monday for the trial." I explained.

I studied her face for a moment to see if she would be relieved or disappointed by this news, but she just nodded her head and looked down at her feet giving me nothing.

"Is everything okay?"

I waited for her to look at me, but she just stood there with hands clenched.

"Sookie, what's going on? First you try to avoid Pam and now you can barely even look at me, I need to talk to you…it's important."

"Eric, don't do this."

"Don't do what? I didn't want to be the one to ask you Sookie, I was hoping you would want to come forward with the truth yourself, to help me."

I felt emotion stir in me, like she was clenching my heart in a vice and she wouldn't let go of it.

"Eric." She replied weakly and shook her head and concluded quietly…

"I can't do this now, please."

Her eyes were tormented and I felt the pits sink in my stomach and I asked her on the verge of losing my rational voice…

"So you don't want to do this anymore?"

"No, I didn't say that."

"What are you saying then? I'm not a mind reader Sookie! Christ, I have no idea what is going through that head of yours." I was on the verge of losing it. Counting to 10 I paused for a moment with no reply. She simply looked back at the house as if she was waiting for someone to come out here and rescue her from me, and then finally I concluded before I lost my cool…

"Come on." I took her hand and she asked me after she realized I had tugged her along with me a few paces.

"Where are we going?"

"We are going for a drive then we are going someplace we can talk, alone."

xxxxx

About 35 minutes later we were standing inside my modest yet stylish 3-bedroom condo in Shreveport. Sookie hadn't said much on the drive over, although that didn't really surprise me. I didn't know what pissed me off more, her nonchalant attitude about my life and our future or her distance. I soon realized it was the distance that bugged me most. It was like the Sookie from yesterday, the Sookie who told me she loved me was gone.

"This is where I live." I explained, although most of the emotion had left my voice. I was waiting for her to say something like, 'I'm sorry!' Or 'What did you want to talk to me about?' Or even 'Id like to see your house,' but it never came.

I knew something was most definitely wrong by this point wondering if I should be contacting my lawyer right now instead of trying to figure out what was going on with my crazy girlfriend, but she worried me.

She looked around for a minute and I waited for her to say something, maybe voice what was on her mind, give her time to take in her surroundings, but she simply asked me…

"Where is your room?"

I met her gaze in confusion, but her eyes were crystal clear with a meaning. She looked at me as if she was reaching out in desperation. I could feel pain rolling off her in waves and torment and need. It was impossible not to cave when she was looking at me like that. I tried to get my head back on straight and fight it replying softly…

"Sookie, I think we need to…"

Now I was the one at a loss for words as her gaze entranced me once again causing me to feel things only she could make me feel, emotions that tugged at my heart, and she took my hand in hers and she whispered…

"Please Eric."

My body was so mixed up by this time I wouldn't have been able to tell you which hand was my right or which was my left. This woman had me so confused. I couldn't deny that I hadn't gone there in my mind-That I hadn't fantasized about seeing her again on the ride home from Shreveport, or that I hadn't fantasized about her last night. But more pressing concerns had pushed through to the forefront of my tormented mind demanding to be heard. Only now I couldn't find those concerns, or my voice to object her subtle suggestion, questioning whether or not this was the right move under the current circumstances…

She stood up on her tiptoes wrapping her arms around me pressing her warm body into mine, which caused an electric pulse to flow through my veins and then her lips brushed mine lightly and she whispered against my mouth…

"Just for tonight."

I inhaled her scent, suddenly spellbound by her warmth, craving her taste she opened her lips a little further and kissed me tenderly, her tongue brushing mine erotically.

I grew hard instantly

When I realized she wasn't going to explain I pointed to the stairs, my mind already mush knowing what was going to happen before it happened and replied…

"It's the first door on the right."

Sookie nodded and turned to face the stairs, looming around the base. I wasn't sure if she was waiting for me or just thinking about whatever had been plaguing her mind.

Whatever it was, the moment I approached her she took a step up and I felt a sudden wave of desperation wash over me. I couldn't quite put my finger on the mixture of lust, anger, and frustration I was feeling, but one minute I was following her to the stairs and the next, I had spun her around, and my lips were crashing against hers in hungry desire.

I pulled her up into my arms shoving my tongue deep into her mouth as she wriggled her body over mine encouraging my longing arousal causing a pleasured groan to escape my lips. We lingered there for a long moment the only noise around us was the chirping crickets outside, I hadn't even turned on all the lights yet, and then I carried her up the stairs with me.

When I set her down, I thought momentarily about our conversation or lack there of, even though Sookie was doing a very good job of making me forget about it all. There was an emotional connection between us now, our relationship had evolved in leaps and bounds since that first night I saw her at Merlottes. I needed and craved that deeper bond we shared wanting her to prove to me that she was still in there, and I asked her looking back at her…

"Sookie?"

Her hands came up to my chest and her lips brushed the hollow of my neck causing my eyes to flutter and groin to inflame with desire forgetting my words, I gasped…

"Will you test…"

But her lips caught mine in that moment her tongue brushing mine once more in sweet sensation, I dipped my head to taste her more intensely, needing her like a drug she kissed me back and then she whispered…

"Lets talk about this tomorrow, I just want you tonight."

She began to trace the waistband of my jeans with her playful hands, moving them up under my tee to caress and stroke my chest, kissing over the fabric and then to my delight, she licked my neck, and kissed her marked spot, concluding…

"Nothing else can come between us now."

As my chin dropped, her lips found mine once more and her hand moved down to the hard bulge in my pants. I felt a surge of pleasure as she massaged me.

It was clear by that point that our conversation was over. Sookie's small hands frantically pulled at my shirt and the waistband of my jeans. She made me even harder as her fingers dipped down and brushed against the naked skin of my thick sex. There was so much pent up emotion, so much desire, heartache, and pain just looming at the surface fighting to come out, and when we reached my bed, it did.

I yanked her top up over her head and then I concentrated on freeing her from the confines of her underwear. Yanking her bra down, and then I kicked off what was left of my denims. I pulled her panties down hurriedly not sparing any time for tenderness or gentility, just wanting to put out this burning fire that was raging inside my dick. Like I said, there was still a part of me that was frustrated that she had just duped me for one of the oldest tricks in the book. And I was going to take the control back right now, whether Sookie wanted me to or not.

I pulled her back to me and kissed her hard on the mouth. My hands instantly finding and groping her perfect breasts. She moaned in pleasure and then placed her hands over mine, which only encouraged my hard on more. They were exquisite, beautiful, large, full and bouncy, nipples already hardened and her small naval was fleshy and round like Venus De Milo, she was breathtaking. Her chest heaved against my arms as I pinned her in-between me and the footboard of my bed.

I didn't want to think about anything that was going on right now, I didn't want it to be tender and sweet, I didn't want to be thankful we had this time together, I didn't want it to be affectionate or remember any of it, like her, I just needed a good fuck that could make both of us forget about the outside world. My raging hard on was already acting before she could even adjust to my size, throbbing, angry, I shoved her heaving chest onto the bed, spread out her damp thighs, and thrust my hard dick into her warm slick drenched sheath from behind.

I heard her cry out my name in pleasure and then I let myself go. It felt so fucking good. I was so hard and throbbing, I felt our skin slap as I pounded into her again and again.

She was on the brink of her orgasm, I could tell, but I remained steadfast like a man on a mission, I had to keep going, as I watched it all from outside myself, allowing the pleasure to rain down on us like the Tempest of the century.

I felt her body spasm below me, the first time, the second, and finally on the third I flipped her over. She looked back at me for a moment as if she was mystified, in her balmy haze she had never looked sexier, she beckoned for me to come to her, to kiss her, to connect with her, but I didn't care. I was in the zone. This felt too good, being in control, taking what was mine and making her respond to me in a method beyond her control.

I was hard as granite and thrust away like my life depended on it. I felt another shudder below me but remained steadfast in my quest to conquer this beast living inside of me. And then I realized I was getting just as good as I was giving. Sookie was trying to get me to respond to her. She matched my rhythm, her tight womb clenching around my raging hunger trying to keep up with me and I felt my body begin to quake with hers joined now as one, moving together like a well oiled machine.

Her thighs were riding low over my hips, legs crossed behind heels bobbing against my ass so her back lay flat along my dark brown duvet, her skin a stark light contrast to the darkness as I watched her long blonde halo of hair above her head climb higher and higher towards the heavens.

She looked at me the dark fire in her eyes, which matched mine, and I pulled her up vertically to me so we could fuck harder. I could no longer resist the temptation to kiss her and pulled her to me, her mouth crashing against mine in starving thirst.

Her body spasmed again, then shuddered, followed by an ecstatic moan that echoed through the room, which only chanted me on.

She clung to me, her eyes lucid, body limber, and I felt the blood course through my veins as if her essence of life had revived me.

She opened her legs pulling me down with her onto the bed. I used my thighs to guide her back and I went in for another kiss before I started to thrust again.

I could feel that slow pleasurable burn flush over me creating a heat between us, this time slowing my pace, drawing it out, milking every erotic second for all it was worth.

There was a burning inside me and as I bit down on her ripe supple breast, I felt warmth from inside her travel down my hard cock from her core to my base.

I gasped knowing I couldn't hold out much longer, forging my way as far as I could go, I pressed on, suckling her, fondling her, spreading her legs further as I pressed all the way back into her core, she cried out one last time, this time it was loud enough to rattle my bones and that's when the pressure gave way like a bomb going off at the fucking Hoover Dam.

"FUUUUUCKKCK!"

I groaned as the sweat beaded along my forehead, and my body jerked, then spasmed experiencing the longest ejaculation of my life. I felt her hips lock me in between her and I looked into her deep gaze one more electrifying jolt running through my veins which paved the way for the blinding purple violet blue light as I filled her up in abundance with my white hot love.

Then the world disappeared from around us and it was just she and I.

After a few minutes, we came back down to earth. The first thing I noticed was her chest heaving against mine. Sookie looked like she was ready to pass out but when her eyes locked with mine and she realized she was still conscious she confessed with a lucid smile softly, tossing her head back against the sheets...

"Holy crap."

I smiled still breathless and I nodded finally in agreement.

"Yeah, holy crap is right."

She smiled back and then her eyes closed tiredly and I crawled over to join her on the bed shifting as we got more comfortable in our chosen positions then she folded into me and confessed softly...

"Can we just stay like this forever?" Sookie close her eyes and nuzzled her nose into my neck to my delight.

"Well maybe, after I've made sure I can still move." I replied with light musing. Her lips curve against my skin and she muttered in jest...

"You're so funny."

"I try."

Her fingers clenched tightly around my shoulders, and I looked down into her blonde mane of hair. I could feel her body tense slightly and I knew she was thinking about something serious. Remembering our agreement to not talk about anything till tomorrow I glanced down at her in question. She looked up at me with blotchy eyes and she asked me in a voice just above a whisper...

"Promise me nothing will split us up? That we can make it through the long haul together?"

I met her gaze in confusion, not understanding quite where this was coming from. Perhaps she was afraid I might lose the trial. Did this mean she wasn't going to say anything about Bill? But before I could finish that thought she concluded...

"I couldn't bear it if I...if I lost you."

It broke my heart to see her so fragile, so torn up, so scared; for me, for us? I didn't want to make a promise I couldn't keep. I didn't know what would happen on Monday. If I was charged with Godric's murder, I could very well lose Sookie forever, which in turn scared me as well. I looked back at her trying to hide my fear with a soft smile, smoothing my fingers through her long wavy blonde hair and then I confessed the words that had been hanging on my lips since the moment I first saw her this afternoon…

"My heart will never stop beating for you."

It must have appeased her worry for the moment because the crease between her eyes disappeared and I felt her chest swell with emotion against mine. She pulled me down for a hot kiss and I held her in my arms. Her heart beat rapidly against my chest in reply. Then her hands ran down along my sides and I pulled back to look at her.

"We just need to stay strong, for each other."

I assured her, part of me asking for her help and commitment, and the other part telling her I would be there for her too. She nodded her head in agreement, although I could still see the wheels turning behind her tormented eyes, and she whispered…

"Yes."

Coming back to me, her gaze locked with mine for a moment before she shifted again, this time using my chest as her pillow. Her grip was firm, body pressed tightly against mine, barely an inch of space spared between our balmy bodies as if she was trying to absorb the energy from my body into her own.

Slowly however, she began to relax again, the slow gentle rhythm of our combined breathing coaxing her to sleep and I watched her chest rise and fall as she drifted off next to me.

I pulled the blanket up over us feeling somewhat tired myself, but I wasn't quite sure if I could stop my mind from thinking about the trial. My thoughts turned from one to the next as if a tango passing one worry off and taking a new, again and again over and over. My body however, was too tired to keep up, and eventually I lost the battle drifting off into my own slumber right beside her.

xxxxx

_SPOV_

When dawn came, the bright light forced my eyes open in tired slits; I looked around noting my new surroundings. In the day his room looked different. The walls were a dark chocolate brown with a glossy striped pattern, complimented by the stark white crown molding against the ceiling. Hanging from the ceiling to the side of the bed were half orbs of light reflecting amber and gold colors through the glass. It was very modern looking, very sleek. I noted the bronze color adorning Eric's drapes and realized he had very good taste. There was a huge black tiki book shelf that took up almost an entire wall, and it was filled from corner to corner with books, CD's an MP3 player. His laptop was sitting on a white table off to the side connected to a sleek printer/copier/scanner and I wondered who this man was. He never complained once about sleeping in Jason's old lumpy tiny bed, nor did he complain about his modest accommodations, or old fashioned, out dated decor. Compared to this place, well there was a BIG difference.

I felt his breath on my neck bringing me back to the big comfortable king size bed. I could smell Eric's musky scent right away and felt him move behind me. His arm wrapped securely around my waist.

I looked down under the sheets realizing I was still naked. We both were, and I blushed.

Last night felt like a dream, a wonderfully delicious dream that I never wanted to end. And maybe it didn't have to, I thought. Wondering if we could stretch out paradise for another day. I would have given anything to pretend yesterday morning didn't happen. The dread falling over me again as I recalled Dr. Larrabee and that god-awful smile. I was carrying Bill's baby and was in love with another man.

For a split second I wondered if Eric would ever even have to know. I didn't want to bring him more pain; he had been through so much, we both had. We both just needed a break. Last night he put my heart at ease when he said he was with me. For the first time in a long time I felt courage and hope. Hope that I might actually be able to do this with his help. And I knew I could only do this if Eric was by my side. If he found out it was Bill's I could kiss our happy little bubble goodbye.

I knew my conscience wouldn't let me keep a secret like that from him though. I owed him more than that. But that didn't mean I had to ruin this right away. I could tell him I was pregnant after the trial. He had enough on his mind anyway right now.

Speaking of which, the signs were becoming abundantly clear now, even in one days time I noticed by bodies changes, senses more acute, a tenderness I couldn't feel before, especially around my breasts, they were throbbing and sensitive as hell. My body already felt different. Not to mention I had to use the little ladies room really badly at the moment.

I carefully pried myself away from Eric but he pulled me back to him, which almost caused me to wet the bed. I kissed him softly on his mouth about to tell him, I had to use the bathroom when he loosened his grip, his fingers causing tingles to race through my arm hairs.

I smiled thinking he looked so sweet right now. I wanted to get everything out of today that I could. I knew I had to work at noon, but that didn't mean we couldn't have a little more fun first. What harm was there in entertaining the last wishes of a woman on death row?

I swiped an askew sheet wrapping it around myself and went off in search of his bathroom. I found the adjoining room to the left. I flicked on the switch and instantly felt like I had been whisked away to some exotic location like India or Asia. His walls painted blood red, stark white tile and an Asian inspired engraved wicker linen chest stood in the corner along with an elephant statue and the biggest plush towels I had ever seen. It looked like a spa with his mosaic tiled mirror and all the designer soaps and bath salts.

I guess it was true, you could tell a lot about a person from their house. Eric was neat, clean, orderly, a designers dream come true, and a total classic.

I realized then I had been rude not to tell him what a beautiful home he had yesterday, not that we had gotten a chance to see much of it.

After I washed up, I looked at myself in his mirror, noting again how fine it looked, and I wondered if I could envision myself here as a permanent fixture as well. I smiled imagining him_…coming out of the steaming glass shower stall and wrapping his large arms around me. He smiled at me in the mirror his blue eyes twinkling, and then he leaned in to kiss my cheek and whisper in my ear…_

"_How can you think Id ever want to help you raise Bill's baby?"_

My face fell when I remembered again what I had done, and how even if I could imagine myself here, I didn't really deserve it. Not after what I was about to put Eric through.

I suddenly felt the urge to purge again, even though I hadn't eaten much yesterday. Realizing this must be morning sickness, and it really wasn't fun. Just another glorious side effect to the amazing wonders of pro creation, I thought bitterly.

Afterwards, I felt much better, but quickly grabbed one of Eric's spare toothbrushes and found his toothpaste. I vowed to buy him a new one, washed up using his shower a second time and then snuck back out hoping to crawl back into the warm bed undetected.

I was two steps away from the bed when I heard his silky voice from behind…

"Good morning my lover…"

I turned around to smile at him, feeling tingles run up and down my spine because he just had that effect on me and replied with a flirty smirk of my own…

"Morning."

"I hope you weren't thinking of getting up yet."

I smiled happy we were on the same page and purposely let my sheet slide down, exposing my full body to him bravely…

"Why would you think that?"

I asked him with a brow raised in jest, already feeling my body react to him, and he smiled smugly, pulling me down with him back onto the bed.

I laughed as his lips met mine and he ran his hand through my damp hair, kissing me in greeting he finally replied…

"Next time wait for me though, us Swedes only truly enjoy communal showering."

He looked back at me as if he was dead serious but I knew he was kidding, and I smiles, then kissed him again, my body molding to his and he concluded.

"I do like the minty fresh though, nice touch."

I smiled; he pulled me down for a kiss this time and then we got lost in each other. My current predicament quickly became a faded memory as he wrapped me in his arms and our navels touched heatedly. I could feel his arousal rise up between my thighs, which in turn reminded me of last night, in a very stimulating way. I was still sore, but that was all forgotten when I felt him brush up along side my entrance, causing a thrill to stir within me. I looked in his eyes and he looked in mine, placing one final sweet kiss on his lips, I then took him inside me and we did that thing we do so well.

xxxxx

A few hours later, we were sitting in Eric's car outside Merlottes. It seemed like we could never catch a break and I wanted to cherish all the time I could spend with him. I had 15 minutes till I had to be at work and I had a spare Merlottes tee waiting for me inside. Luckily, I had to order another one last week when I spilled ketchup all over my old one, so I had a spare waiting and we didn't have to take a detour to my place for another uniform.

Our tongues meshed and I breathed him in as he wrapped his large hands around me, causing tingles to run up and down my spine. I didn't want to leave him and I asked with blushing lips…

"Let's go back to your place tonight, so it's just the two of us again…Ill tell my Gran we're working on your legal issues."

He looked back at me in question, and I realized that I had brought up his trial and we were supposed to talk about that today, but we hadn't yet got a chance to. Partially because of me, partially because neither of us wanted to get out of bed this morning.

"Sookie…" He whispered my name over his lips and his earnest eyes met mine and I knew exactly what he intended to ask me and I nodded my head…

"I'll tell them whatever you want me to say."

He creased his brows and ran his fingers through my hair and he replied gently, his blue eyes locked with mine seriously…

"Sookie, if you do anything, I want you to tell the truth okay?"

I frowned feeling nervous all of the sudden, wishing we could just go back to making out, but I couldn't deny those intense blue puppy dog eyes looking at me as if his life depended on it, and in a way it probably did. I felt a pit form in my stomach. I wanted to help him so badly, I just didn't know if what I said could help. But I loved him. God I loved him. Wishing more than ever right now that he was this baby's father my mind began to turn back to my personal dilemma in worry.

But I realized he was waiting for me to respond, pushing back my melancholy thoughts; I looked back at him and nodded my head answering him quietly…

"Okay."

Eric smiled softly and he pulled me towards him to plant one final longing kiss on my mouth. I felt a stirring in my loins knowing Id have to take another trip to the ladies room before I started work, and I kissed him back desperately.

Finally after what seemed like only a few seconds he pulled back pressing his forehead to mine and he replied…

"I better let you get to work."

I leaned in and our lips locked again, wondering if I could get by with calling in sick today, but I knew Sam had seen us when Eric pulled in.

"I can't wait till tonight when I get you all to myself."

I replied happily. He kissed me softly once, his tongue swiping the side of my mouth sweetly, obvious now that neither one of us wanted to leave the car and his lips peeled from mine delightfully, like tape.

"Neither can I."

He confessed and our lips met.

"I love you."

I replied and he smirked, kissing me, and he answered…

"Ditto." I smiled and locked lips, one last time, knowing I had to get going. My 15 minutes had now been cut in less than half.

Pulling away reluctantly I finally grabbed my purse, opened the car door and slid out, casting him a flirty smile full of promise before I went inside.

Not quite sure why it was, that I always felt better after I was with Eric.

xxxxx

I got inside, noting the bar was pretty quiet. I guessed business really wouldn't pick up till the game began. So I went back to Sam's office where we stored our things and ran into Tara who was just touching up her lip-gloss. I had to smile because even though she pretended not to give a crap about her looks, it was obvious she really did.

"Don't tell me you are doing the morning after walk into work? I swear, it's like I don't even recognize you anymore Stackhouse."

I met her gaze in confusion asking her for clarification…

"Excuse me?"

"Girl, I just ran into your ex down at the Seven Eleven."

"You what?"

"He told me you're pregnant. Please tell me I am trippin!"

I felt the pits in my stomach drop knowing the cat was now out of the bag. I sighed realizing this wasn't good, not if Bill was already spreading the word and looked back at her in desperation wishing I could tell her that she was absolutely 100% misinformed, but unfortunately it broke my heart to tell her I couldn't and finally I replied sadly….

"No Tara, sorry to say, you're not trippin."

"What the fuck Sookie?"

Her eyes widened and she demanded….

"You're sayin that Numb Nuts was telling the truth?"

I put my hand over my forehead feeling a sharp pain in my head from the sudden tension this subject gave me. And then Tara handed me a bag of what looked like baby books, a couple of soft blankets, a rattle, and a card, and she replied…

"He wanted me to give this to you. I was about to tell him to go stick it where the sun don't shine, but I figured I could save you the trouble of havin to deal with him later yourself if I just took it."

"Thanks Tara." I replied accepting the gift reluctantly.

"At least tell me that ass hole Bill aint the father?"

I paused for a long moment, taking a deep sigh, it hurt so much to think it, and finally looking down at the bag in my hands, I sighed out of frustration and answered…

"I don't know."

I looked up at Tara wishing she might be able to offer me some of her wisdom, I really needed her help right now, advice, anything really, and the support of a friend, and part of me was somewhat relieved that I was able to talk to someone about this touchy subject. But before I could speak another word my face fell when I spotted a familiar pair of blue eyes glaring down at me in shock.

Behind Tara, stood Eric frozen there in the doorway holding my red phone in his hands, the phone I must have forgotten in his car earlier, his smile fading right before my eyes.

Then my heart stopped as everything I knew in this world to be important, meaningful, and hopeful spun before my eyes like one big hurricane.


	21. Chapter 21

**AN: **Okay this one was a hard one to write. I was literally editing up until 5 minutes ago, lol. So hopefully I didn't overwork this chapter. It's got alot of stuff in it, heavy emotional stuff. I hope I dont offend anyone, but the things these characters are going through are very real and true to life, so just keep that in mind. Also I apologize, I wanted to get to the paternity issue in this chapter, but it just didn't have room. Im going to aim for the next chapter, which is going to be very challenging since I have to orchestrate a criminal trial, lol. Anyhow, I hope you still like it and stay tuned. Thanks to everyone for the awesome reviews, you guys keep me going, I wouldnt be doing this without your support, so I want you to know I appreciate it. Also, I made a banner for this story. You can get the official link on my profile page if this link doesnt come through. Part of it was taken from a wonderful ES manip I found on google images, but I dont know who the artist is, so if this belongs to you, credit goes to the artist for the wonderful Sookie/Eric embrace. ;) Thanks again and hope you enjoy the story. Oh and heres the link to the banner...

http:/i18(dot)photobucket(dot)com/albums/b135/barn0164/true%20blood/thebirthofeve(dot)jpg

**Chapter 21-Somewhere Over the Rainbow**

_SPOV_

I knew there was no way Eric could not have heard that, not when I had just witnessed the color drain from his face from forehead to chin.

_Fuck._

"I think I'm going to leave you two kids alone, Ill cover for you out on the floor." Tara replied to me, backing away cautiously as if she was trying to get out of a room holding a ticking time bomb, mouthing an 'I'm sorry' to me before she snuck out past Eric.

I met his gaze sadly and he just stared at me for what seemed like forever in disbelief. I didn't dare move feeling all my hairs stand on end, along with pits sinking in my stomach making me feel nausea once again. But I had to face this, I had to face the truth, as much as I wanted to run and hide right now, I knew I needed to deal with this.

_Say something_. I begged him silently with my eyes and finally he spoke calmly…

"You're pregnant?"

I swallowed as if I were downing a vial of poison, his lethal words processing through my mind and I nodded my head, hoping that his lack of anger was a good sign I whispered hoping he wouldn't freak out about this like I had…

"Yes."

But unfortunately, I had presumed too soon. He approached me, his tall body looming over mine in challenge, his eyes intense and dark…

"When were you going to tell me this? How long have you known?"

"Eric, I…"

"And it's Compton's?"

He wasn't giving me a chance to reply the questions firing on, I shook my head and replied truthfully, fearfully…

"I don't know, I just found out yesterday, but it could be."

He met my gaze with pain filled eyes and I confessed…

"Eric, it was an accident, I never meant, I mean, I don't, I…"

I didn't know what I wanted to say, maybe that I was just as surprised as he was, but it was coming out wrong.

Eric looked back at me annoyed as if I was just some stupid pesky fly swarming around his head and he cut me off sharply…

"I think under the circumstances you should just go home tonight, Ill call Pam and ask her to pick you up after your shift."

Now I was starting to get angry, first off, I didn't need to be treated like a child, I could find my own ride home, and secondly, what happened to last night? It's not like I planned this and I cut him off as he began to head back towards the door…

"You promised me nothing would come between us!" I proclaimed feeling hurt by his words, growing frustrated and he bit back…

"That was before you neglected to tell me you were knocked up!"

"Knocked up? Knocked up? It takes two to make a baby you know?"

He snorted and remarked sarcastically…

"Yeah, trust me I know, the question is do you?"

He made my blood boil and skin blister in anger.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? You make it sound like having a girlfriend who's knocked up would put a kink in your agenda!"

He glared back at me and he asked me sharply…

"What agenda?"

"The one where you try to butter me up so Ill testify for you at your trial."

I knew it was wrong before the words came out of my mouth, but I couldn't hold them back. I saw the sharp sting as it registered across Eric's face and he growled…

"You are unbelievable!"

His words sliced me. I flinched refusing to back down, I knew I had dug my trench but I'd only look worse if I retreated now, holding my ground I held my head up high and then he concluded sharply…

"Is it really that hard to admit the truth Sookie? If I meant something to you, you wouldn't care about protecting HIM so much. This is so hard for you to do isn't it? To reach out to me when you're all out of options? You were just using me because you needed someone to help you pick up the pieces weren't you? You'd be fine letting me rot in prison if you didn't need a father for that baby, one who wasn't a rapist!"

Now I was the one with my head spinning. I couldn't believe he was saying this, after all we had been through together. After he knew how long it had taken me to get to a point where I was willing to speak up for him. How could he think me even capable of using him like that? How could he hurt me like this? I felt the tears well in my eyes and I shouted at him…

"GET OUT!"

I didn't want to see him anymore, it was too painful.

He looked like he was about to say something, but I wasn't about to take any more of his hurtful words and I shouted…

"GET THE FUCK OUT!"

To my embarrassment, Sam came in moments later with Tara behind him, her arms folded and Eric turned around to look at them.

"Is everything alright?" Sam asked, standing up straighter protectively when he saw Eric looming there.

He seemed too steamed to say anything else, casting me a simmering glance, the hurt apparent behind his eyes, but I was sure my pain was far worse. I waited for him to say something.

"Yes, I was just leaving, Ill see myself out."

Eric replied sending me another one of those torturous glares before turning on his heel and storming out.

Sam was about to come to me, but I felt like a grenade about to go off at the moment, not wanting to deal with any questions from him. Luckily Tara noticed this and she ordered him…

"Sam, give us a minute will ya?"

Tara sent him a warning glare. Sam looked back at me one more time for confirmation and I replied, not trusting my own voice…

"It's okay, I'm fine Sam."

I knew I was far from fine, but this wasn't his problem, it was mine and I just wanted to get rid of every reminder of that problem so I could find some goddamn peace for once!

Sam nodded and then he closed the door behind him.

xxxxx

_EPOV_

I was in no mood for talking. I knew if I went to see Pam, she'd find some way to drag it out of me. I couldn't believe Sookie. I had no idea she was capable of manipulation on that kind of scale. I guess I underestimated her. I kept going over last night in my mind over and over again, thinking back to if I remembered her even giving a moments pause to tell me that she was pregnant. But I couldn't think of anything. As I retraced my memory back to this morning, I remember hearing the shower run once, and then again shortly after, and her breath tasted like mint.

I wondered if she had tried to cover up her morning sickness or something. It made me angry and gave me heartache at the same time. I didn't know what Id do if that baby really did turn out to be mine. Or worse yet, that bastard Bill's.

Talk about being fucked. What was I supposed to do now? I was about to get carted off to prison, my entire life was crumbling to shit faster than I could find the Lysol to cover up the stink, I just couldn't deal with this too, everything was getting so out of control…

I saw a pair of metal litter bins off to the side and I smashed my leg through them knocking each cylinder over, as the contents spilled out of the side. I thought while looking down at all the garbage before me that this is what had become of my life and then I heard someone yell from behind me…

"Hey!"

I looked back and saw Sookie's boss standing there with his arms crossed, looking angry. Just add him to the list of people who wanted to see me taken out back and shot and quartered, I thought bitterly.

"I'll pay for the damage."

I replied dryly taking my wallet out and handing him two $50's, knowing where this was headed. He'd now ask me to go on my way and never come back. I looked back at him waiting for it, but instead he refused the cash and replied looking out at the disaster I made…

"I don't think there's any monetary damage, but you could clean up the mess you just made."

I looked back at him in question. Sam took a seated position on the curb as a gesture that he wanted to talk to me, not understanding why he didn't just take the money and let me leave, I had no other choice but to go out and pick up what I could from the spilled bags of trash, while he sat and waited. I looked back at him resentfully because I was in no mood for chit chat right now, wanting to know what this was really about.

Maybe he got off on humiliating people and I asked him in challenge…

"Don't you have a business to run?"

Sam simply sighed and gestured to the empty space next to him…

"Have a seat."

I scoffed in disbelief, asking him…

"You're not actually serious?"

Wondering if he was kidding because it seriously looked like he wanted to give me the big brother talk and I was miles away from caring about that at the moment, I had far worse things to think about, like how I was going to spend my last day of freedom because it was very likely that tomorrow I was going to be locked away for a very long time. But his gaze was unwavering and finally, I surrendered to the pressure tossing away the last scrap of garbage hesitantly, I took the spot next to him on the concrete slab and looked back at him again in question.

Sam took a breath of fresh air, looking out at his parking lot and then he replied…

"I know what it's like to feel like an outsider…I just moved here myself about a year ago, before that I was in Amarillo, before that in Macon. Never really found a place to fit in, till I moved here and realized what I sacrificed back in Amarillo."

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked him, thinking of all the things I could be doing right now, closing up my condo, talking to the bank…

"Because I can see this train wreck coming for miles."

I snorted again wondering if he was for real. This guy had never even actually spoken with me until now. The only contact I really remember having with him was when I was glaring daggers at him while he took Sookie away on that date. Thinking about that night only made me angrier and Sam replied…

"I realize we barely know each other, I don't know why I'm telling you, I could watch you go away and fuck this up and probably fuck up everything else too and I wouldn't think twice about watching you drive away like a bat out of hell and never looking back, but we have one thing in common."

I glanced back at him wondering if he was going to tell me we were both blonde because this was getting 'that' ridiculous and finally Sam concluded…

"I care about her too…And for some crazy reason she seems to be happier since you got here."

I realized he was talking about Sookie and my face fell in grief. Doubtfully, I replied…

"I think I can honestly say, if she's happy, than I am the poster boy for abstinence."

Sam smirked and shook his head, and he replied with mirth in his eyes…

"Yeah, you got yourself into quite the situation dincha?"

I looked back at him wondering how much he had heard and Sam gestured back towards the restaurant with his head…

"Place is solid as a brick house, but my office wall is as thin as paper…Congratulations by the way."

I looked back at him in discomfort not feeling really at this point as if Congratulations were in order, and then Sam replied folding his hands…

"Sookie's a good girl Eric."

"I really don't think that…" I was about to tell him to butt out when he somehow read my mind and stood, concluding sharply…

"She's not the kind of girl to take for granted."

He sent me a glare and then turned around and walked back into his restaurant.

I was just as miffed by the start of this conversation as I was by the end.

xxxxx

_SPOV_

"So now I suppose everyone knows." I replied collapsing down on Sam's couch and burying my face in my hands, wishing I could just fade away into air. I think I was all out of tears by this point. I was done crying for that asshole. He had hurt me for the last time, I thought angrily.

"Nah, don't think anyone else knows, Bill asked me if I was expecting when I ran into him. I told him first off, it wasn't his fuckin business, and secondly, unless I had somehow immaculately conceived, he must be smoking something."

She moved towards Sam's desk and continued…

"After I blew him off, I turned back to my shopping. A little later when I was out in the parking lot with my bags, he chased after me and handed me this (she gestured to the bag next to her on Sam's desk, sitting right next to my red phone, my eyes locked in on a large fingerprint mark on the surface that must have been Eric's and the pain churned inside causing my nostrils to flare still angry…) He nearly escaped a black eye, charging after me like that but I figure must have put two and two together. I told him he was crazy to think you were pregnant, but then he told me what happened when he ran into you the other day."

I shook my head, taking a deep breath knowing it was only a matter of time before my whole world shattered and Sookie Stackhouse would not only be known as the town freak, but the town freak who had been attacked, refused a marriage proposal by the only man who ever truly loved her, and rejected by the man she loved.

I stood up and began to pace the floor, in an attempt to blink it all away, even though I knew that was hopeless. Tara must have noticed my distraught and she assured me…

"Despite the fact that I think he's a Motherfuckingdickhead, he did seem genuinely concerned about you, I don't think he's going to sing it from the rooftops. But then again, I've been crossed by men before, who knows what they are capable of."

I looked up at her with blotchy eyes and I shook my head again and I wiped the tear stains off my cheeks replying resentfully…

"Just when you think you have one figured out the turn around and dump you on the nearest curb."

Tara went over to Sam's mini fridge. She pulled out a can of beer and replied still holding it in her hand…

"Id offer you one of these but I don't think that would be good for the baby."

She some how found a can of Minute Maid orange juice and brought it over to me along with her beer.

I looked back at her through tear stained eyes and I shook my head remarking bitterly half serious, needing to address one of the many absurd and dark thoughts that had been plaguing my mind as of late, just needing to get something out...

"I don't know, maybe..."

My voice trailed off as I thought about the painful subject of ending this pregnancy and Tara asked me for clarification...

"Maybe what?"

I looked up at her and added trying to get the frog out of my throat, trying to be brave...

"Maybe, it wouldn't be such a bad idea..."

"Are you talkin about what I think you're talkin about?"

I met her gaze with dread and she shook her head and replied...

"I never thought Id become one of those girls, but..."

"Before you say what I think you're going to say, take a seat!"

Tara looked back at me sternly pointing me towards the couch curtly and I wondered suddenly why this was bugging her so much, it was my baby, my problem. She shoved the can of orange juice in my hand and sat down next to me.

Tara didn't seem to care as she took a long hard swig from her beer bottle, then set it down, sighed and met my gaze head on as if in challenge. She had me baffled and I had no other choice but to wait, when Tara finally began...

"You know that guy I was dating about a year and a half ago? Eggs?"

"Yeah, that musician, I remember him, what ever happened to him? You two seemed so happy."

Tara proceeded to glare at me and I was about to put a stop to this right now because she wasn't the one with her head on the chopping block right now, and that's when she proceeded to shove her shoe in my mouth and stun me...

"Happiness is easy to pretend."

She sent me another glare and concluded bluntly...

"He got me pregnant Sookie."

I gasped in shock shaking my head because this was the first I had heard about this. Tara looked down at her hands sadly and explained...

"I thought we would be one big happy family after that, but when I told him he took off with his band and I never heard from him again."

My heart went out to Tara and I put my hand on hers, but her face remained hard and she concluded...

"I had an abortion about 2 months after I realized he wasn't comin back..."

My hand flew up to my mouth in dismay. I had no idea.

"But, I think they did some damage down there and now I'm pretty sure I can't have kids...Not like I ever deserved any."

She looked back at me her nostrils flaring slightly and I could tell she was angry, but Tara just shook her head and added...

"So you see I'm one of 'those girls."

I felt a tight pressure in my chest and moved over to put my arms around Tara.

"I'm so sorry." I replied as the gloom washed over me feeling sadness for my friend, what she went through, sadness for that baby that missed out on a beautiful life with a beautiful person, sad for this baby growing inside of me because I didn't want to admit that I was lost to someone so completely and totally dependant on me.

Finally, Tara broke down. I felt a pang of distress tear inside of me and I held her tighter. For the moment we were just two lost souls who had managed to find ourselves on our wayward journeys through life. The irony, as scary as it all was, as horrible as it was, I strangely felt comfort in this, knowing even if we were two very screwed up people, we weren't alone. So I held her as she cried in my arms.

After what seemed like eternity we finally loosened our grips and I whispered...

"You would have been an awesome mother."

Tara looked back at me, it felt like in these last few moments she had aged 10 years and she shook her head and replied, with a small smile...

"No I wouldn't, but I appreciate the vote of confidence."

She moved over to take another swig of her beer, wiping away her tears and pulling herself together she added...

"But Id hate to lose my chance at becoming an Antie." Tara replied looking at me sideways.

I confessed truthfully...

"I don't know what I'm going to do. I honestly don't know...I've never felt this scared before..."

Tara took a deep breath, and then her gaze met mine and she answered earnestly…

"Think about all your options, even the ugly ones, but remember, some choices we make can't be undone…"

I looked back at her sadly and nodded my head, confessing…

"I just don't know if I can do this alone."

"Well you could start by figuring out who this kids daddy is, then at least you'll know who to kick in the nuts." Tara suggested.

I smiled softly thankful for her humor because it took some of the edge off and I explained…

"I just don't think I could go back to Bill if it were his…It's just…"

"No one's askin you to. Id personally slap you if you even considered it. (She looked back at me curtly.) Hell look at how many kids Arlene's got? Look how many baby daddies? She could probably set a world record, yet one redneck seems to love them just as much as the next. Why should you sacrifice your happiness just because of DNA?"

"And Eric…"

My voice trailed off as I thought heart achingly about him, my chest still throbbing in pain. Wondering if he had just left me, the same way Eggs had walked out on Tara, that knife in my heart digging deeper

"Yeah, he's got legal troubles, that much I put together." Tara proclaimed.

"He's been charged with murder, tomorrow is his trial."

Tara whistled lowly and then she remarked with empathy…

"Yeah Sugar, you take the cake for the worst shit storm." She took another swig of her beer and looked back at me through the sides of her eyes replying…

"And you sure he's got no interest in this kid?"

I shook my head and closed my eyes, feeling the pain travel from within up into my stinging eyes….

"I don't know, he's got a lot on his mind right now, but I think it's safe to say I'm not his first priority."

"Well none of that matters anyway, what matters right now is you, just concentrate on getting your own shit together, and if they can't man up and support you, then at least you found out now versus 5 or 10 years from now…You got lots of support here from everyone, and I'll be first in line to help with the little caca machine when you need a break and feel like pulling all your hair out or blowing something up."

I forced a smile for Tara just so she knew I appreciated her support. One thing I always liked about Tara is she gave it to me straight, none of that sugar coating crap, but I couldn't hide the pang of disappointment the thought of doing this without Eric gave me.

I wouldn't cry, Tara had seen enough of my tears today and I had to get it together. I didn't want her to think she had failed me. So I turned away from her, took a deep breath in attempt to pull myself together and announced with a small encouraging smile that we both needed to get back to work.

Tara looked back at me reluctantly, but I assured her I was fine. Sam ran into us in the hallway and told me I could go home if I wanted, but in truth, I needed a distraction right now. I had a lot to think about.

But if I was hoping for a break from all the chaos or even a moments peace while at work, I was sorely mistaken.

I had just come from delivering a pitcher of beer to Detective Bellefleur questioning whether he should actually be drinking that much on his own when Lafayette asked me if I could deliver Arlene's order while she was gabbing away on the phone. I rolled my eyes hoping Arlene would make it snappy because I had my own tables to get to as well, and we were busy.

I grabbed the ketchup and mustard setting it on my tray along with the plate of burgers and fries and then brought it to her customers when I noticed someone else was now seated in her section.

I questioned whether or not I should yank Arlene away from her phone call, but I could see the customers tapping foot under the table and figured I could take her drink order and then bitch Arlene out. I walked over and spoke to her…

"Hi welcome to Merlottes, my name is Sookie, can I start you off with…"

But my voice dropped off when the customer set down the large menu and I recognized her instantly.

"Hello darling." She smiled smugly.

It was Pam. My face fell, and she quickly replied…

"Yes about my order, I was wondering if we could have a little chat before you took it?"

"Pam, I'm busy now, I really don't have time for this, you can call me tonight."

I answered looking back to make sure no one was flagging me down and she grabbed my wrist and yanked me down to sit next to her.

"Take a seat, your feet must be sore by now, I insist." Pam replied with a smooth cool smile, but her voice was sharp. I landed with a hmpff, and glared back at her in challenge and then Pam replied…

"Don't worry, Eric told me to back off and leave you alone if I ever want him to speak to me again"

"So what are you doing right now?" I challenged her knowing full well what she was trying to do, and Pam replied looking back to study her menu…

"I'm having dinner of course, a girl has to eat."

I rolled my eyes recognizing a bullshit artist when I saw one, and began to slide away from her knowing this wouldn't get me anywhere and I replied…

"And I'm going to go back to waiting my tables so you can do that. Ill tell Arlene to check back with you in a few minutes."

I had almost made it out when I heard her voice drop to a serious tone causing me to cease my quick escape…

"Sookie, wait!"

I met her gaze in question, but I could see something more behind her blue eyes, not only worry, but a desperation. I stood up wanting to have the upper hand should I need to make a bee line for the back and I asked her from the edge of the table…

"What is it?"

Pam sighed frustratedly, looked down at her menu miserably and she replied…

"When this is all over, I'm officially retiring from meddling in your affairs."

"I think that's a good idea." I replied with a curt smile, but it was clear she wasn't done…

"But…"

"But?" I asked looking at her curiously, and Pam explained…

"Eric wont tell me what happened. In fact I only spoke to him for 5 minutes via the phone. He told me you both need your space right now, but if this is just some stupid lovers quarrel, then I can help, I know you both are too stubborn to ask for it, which makes my blood boil, but I cant just sit here and do nothing and watch him march away to his imprisonment tomorrow when I think I could possibly do something about it."

I looked back at her feeling my heart sink again. Sighing because this was a painful subject for me too I explained calmly…

"It's not some stupid lovers quarrel Pam, it's bigger."

She returned my gaze earnestly and Pam replied…

"Is it something I can talk to him about, just say the word and Ill do whatever you want."

I sighed again, this time due to frustration, but also it was hard to watch Pam try to help when I knew she couldn't do anything, because I felt the same earlier, and I replied…

"No Pam, I'm sorry, there's nothing you can do, but I appreciate the offer."

I tried to sound grateful because in a way I was, I knew Pam wanted to help, but I meant what I said. She looked down at her hands as if she was searching for her next words and I assured her…

"Don't worry, Ill be there tomorrow."

Pam looked up at me hopefully and I explained not wanting her to get the wrong idea because I was sure Eric was already moving on. The idea that I could be pregnant with Bills baby was too much for him and I couldn't say I blamed him. Although I was disappointed. I thought we were more than this, but like Tara said, it's better to find out now. I was going to need to make a list of the people I could count on, especially over the next year. I couldn't deny however, that it did make me distressed to know Eric was not on that list.

"As a friend, I owe him that much."

She creased her brows in disappointment and I explained putting my hand on her shoulder…

"We don't always get to have our cake and eat it too, but we can make the best out of what we do still have and celebrate the good things, like freedom…I'm sure he's going to get off, they don't put innocent people in jail."

I assured her trying desperately to see the silver lining in all of this, because that was a very hard thing to do for me at the moment.

She looked back at me sadly and for some reason I felt the urge to run away. It caused too much pain to be in this small space with Pam right now, she reminded me too much of him. I felt like I would break down if I stayed so I nodded my head and replied with a simple smile…

"Ill send Arlene over in a minute to take your order."

When I came back out from the restroom, Pam was gone. I sighed again and wondered if I had made the right move. It's not like I had much choice in the matter. If Eric was going to walk out on me before he even knew if he was partially responsible for creating this little being, how was he going to handle taking care of it.

I wondered if this afternoon was the last time Id really get to talk to him. There was the trial of course, but I imagined he would be too busy dealing with his lawyer and everything else.

I just wished it would stop aching so much. I felt this emptiness that just wouldn't go away, especially after Pam had come and gone. But I had no choice, I needed the money, I needed the job, so I shook it off as best I could and kept my head held high. I kept thinking about what this baby would look like, and tried to concentrate on the good things as the time passed. One good thing is kids loved unconditionally, so my baby could never break my heart. And even if we weren't a traditional family, he or she would still have love around them. I would never settle for any less.

Those thoughts got me through the rest of the day and before I knew it, my shift was over. Sam was short a bartender and asked Tara if she could stay so she could get some overtime. Luckily, Jason happened to swing by Merlottes for a burger with Hoyt and I asked him if he could give me a ride home.

I told Tara she was off the hook and she reminded me to go see a doctor as soon as I could, she assured me it would make me feel better knowing what I was up against. I gave her a hug thanking her and assuring her I would be okay and then left with Jason.

On the ride home Jason told me about this great bar called "Freyja" in Shreveport he went to last night, insisting that I had to go out there sometime soon, because it was the coolest bar he'd ever seen. I didn't bother to tell him, I wouldn't be drinking for awhile, for at least 9 months.

His mention of Shreveport took me back to thinking about Eric. I had spent all afternoon and evening trying to put him in the back of my mind but with one word it all came flooding back. I wondered if this would ever stop hurting. But before I could think any more that nausea came swimming back up to the surface and I had to ask Jason to pull over.

"We're almost home."

He argued, and literally we had just turned into the long winding driveway, but I couldn't hold it and I begged him…

"Pull over, now!"

"Okay, okay!"

Jason did as I asked and within seconds I had pulled off my seatbelt, opened the car door, and ran into the woodlands as the contents of my stomach hurled out in front of me I crouched over in exhaustion and pain. Somehow I knew my body had been holding this in, ever since work, but I could no longer contain it. I realized that morning sickness wasn't necessarily always in the morning. Something I had to ask the doctor about because I wasn't sure if this was normal.

"Geez, Sook are you okay?" Jason slammed his door shut and ran over to help me up.

I spit the last of the bitterness out of my mouth and then stood up and looked at him for a moment and then Jason replied patting my back…

"You musta got the flu or somethin, I'm sure Gran will know what to do." He offered to take my hand.

Before I gave it to him, I needed to know positioning my words carefully as if to not give anything away…

"Jason?" I turned to face him.

"Yeah Sook?"

"If you, if you had a girlfriend who you got pregnant by accident, but it scared you and you weren't sure if you had enough money to support her and a baby and you weren't ready to commit to her, would you leave her alone?"

Jason's face colored white and he asked me stiffening up…

"Why are you askin me this, did someone tell you I knocked them up? Was it Dawn? Cause this is the first I heard any of that I swear!"

I could see Jason was freaking out and I assured him taking his hand and trying to calm him down…

"No sweetie, this is hypothetically…"

"Hypo what?"

"You know, it's pretend. But would you leave her?"

Jason shook his head and he looked at me straight in the eye his face hard and full of pride and he answered…

"No, Id do right by her, Id ask her to move in with me and then we'd go from there."

I smiled faintly. In that moment I felt a sudden wave of emotion wash over me knowing Jason was one of the good guys helped me immensely. Throughout the course of the day I was starting to wonder if there were any good men left. I was happy to have my big brother here with me to support and protect me I leaned in and gave him a hug.

After a moment of silence, Jason proclaimed…

"Sook, this is nice and all, but maybe you aughtta get to bed or somethin if you're not feeling well."

I smiled adoring his gullible nature in this moment, I leaned over to kiss his cheek and then agreed.

"Okay."

He insisted I get back in the truck and he drive me the rest of the way even if it was just a couple hundred feet.

I made a mental note to bury that mess in the morning, and then did my best to assure my Gran that everything was alright after Jason worriedly brought me inside.

I told her I had a headache, which I did, and just wanted to go to bed early. I had experienced enough stress for today, having to relive it all right now was not something I wanted. Gran kissed me on the forehead said she would bring me up some chicken soup and then they pretty much left me alone. I pretended to be asleep when my Gran came up later to check on me with the soup, but ravished it hungrily after she left. I knew I had to face her too, tell both she and Jason what was happening, but I wanted to at least see the doctor first so they wouldn't think me some common street whore who didn't know who the father of her child was, even if I already knew it was practically true.

xxxxx

In the morning I got up early. Not early enough to avoid my Gran who I spotted from my bedroom window already out in the yard working on her garden.

I didn't know how I was going to talk to her and reasoned that I would try my best to make a quick beeline past her and to my car. I had some errands to run before I drove to Shreveport.

I took a shower, feeling a little better, but the having to pee thing was starting to bug me. I must have gotten up at least 3 times during the night, and I hadn't remembered drinking that much. I kept a mental notepad of all the things I needed to ask the doctor. I just didn't know if I could handle anything else going wrong. I was doing everything I could just to hold it together right now.

I slipped on my best baby blue dress, and opted for flats to wear with it. I needed to look nice and presentable. I wasn't quite sure what the lawyers would ask me, but I hoped they would just keep the subject to Eric's whereabouts and his motive during those first few days he had lived here.

I put on a white dressy knit cardigan over my dress and added a string of pearls for good luck. They had been a high school graduation gift from my Gran and meant a lot to me.

I pinned my hair up in a twist and then I called the clinic. They said the OBGYN did not have an opening till 11:30. Which left me with some extra time, possibly too much extra time, which meant I had to get out of here unless I wanted to face the firing squad.

So I grabbed my purse, took a slice of toast to go, along with a small swig of coffee and then I was out the door. I waved goodbye to my Gran successfully dodging her, and told her from across the yard that I would see her this afternoon. She told me to give Eric a hug for her and I said I would, although I wasn't so sure how Eric would receive a hug from me at this point.

Nevertheless, I had some time to kill, and a very nervous churning stomach so I got in my car and started to drive.

I was surprised when 15 minutes later I was sitting in the parking lot of Bon Temps one and only church.

I knew I needed all the spiritual guidance I could get right now and although it was a Monday and Id probably get reprimanded for missing the last months of Sunday services should anyone catch me here, I found a desire to go inside and just sit in one of the pews for a few minutes.

My emotional wounds from yesterday weren't throbbing but they were still numb. I looked up at the altar and the large cross standing there reminding us all what this was for. I thought about Bill and Eric, and what happened between us. I went over in my mind how it was possible that Bill was ready to jump into this feet first with me while Eric turned away from me. Yes it was complicated, but did that really matter in the grand scheme of things?

I needed a sign because I was lost and needed to find my way home. I got down on my knees and prayed for the first time in a really long time. I asked God for guidance, I prayed that I could make it through this, that the life inside me could make it through this. I prayed for Eric and his freedom. I prayed for Bill and hoped he could find the redemption he so desperately sought. I prayed and asked that some day I could be happy again, that this child would make me happy, and most importantly, I prayed that I could give this baby a better future than I ever dreamed of.

I prayed for it all. When I was done and I rose to leave turning around I saw the blinding white lights of the day waiting for me behind the massive arch doors.

I felt a wave of pressure lift from me as I went from the inside of the church to the outside and knew the rest of this was up to me now, no more waiting around for things to happen. So when I got to the parking lot, I was finally ready to face this pregnancy. I had gone through so much in my young life, I knew I could do this too. I could do it because I was strong and capable and was never going to be a victim again.

I took a deep breath when I finally got to the clinic. Gearing myself up and start this long road that was now set out ahead of me.

I closed my eyes, took one more deep breath for good measure putting on a brave face and then walked towards the door.

I had only taken 10 steps when I heard my phone ring inside my purse. I moved my purse to my other arm as I dug around for the phone with my right and then felt the small red object heat up in my palm. I pulled it out and looked down at the screen. My pulse began to race nervously when I saw the name that popped up on my caller id.

_It was Eric._

My rings were almost up, I only had it set to 5, so I didn't have much time for shock once the 4th ring came around, I quickly turned it on and croaked out a…

"Hello?"

"Sookie?"

His honey coated voice caused my body to light up like a switchboard and I answered not trusting my emotions, yet still surprised…

"Hey."

I heard a short breath on the other end, my mind spinning as I attempted to conjure up a reason for his call, and he confessed after a few moments pause…

"I wanted to hear your voice…"

"You did?" I asked him still confused but I couldn't deny the quickening speed of my now rapidly beating heart. I felt like I was looking at myself from above and he replied with a swallow…

"Yeah….um how are you feeling?"

"You mean aside from being bloated, sore, and having to pee every 10 minutes?" I answered truthfully, wondering where my etiquette sensor had gone, although despite my poor manners it broke the ice a little. I thought I heard him smile from the other end and he replied…

"I could have helped you with some of that if you hadn't tossed me out."

My jaw dropped in shock that he was blaming me for yesterday and I shot back, knowing he was trying to get a rise out of me but falling for it nevertheless…

"I tossed you out? I seem to recall you telling me you were going to have Pam take me home or did I hallucinate that?"

I heard him sigh and he answered earnestly…

"I'm sorry Sookie, I was in shock, it came as a surprise."

"Well imagine how I took it." I retorted.

There was another moment of silence and I found myself yearning for him to speak again.

"She didn't bother you did she? Pam?"

He asked.

"No…I spoke to her briefly but she kept it pretty clean."

I confessed sugar coating things for Pam's sake because I didn't want Eric to be mad at her. I wondered if he was just trying to protect himself by threatening Pam to stay away, although at the time, I found the gesture relieving.

"Yeah, Pam making anything brief is pretty much a myth." Eric mused lightly and I found myself smiling faintly, yet still left yearning for more from him as the torrent of emotions swirled inside me. I wanted him to tell me more about why he made this call, why he missed my voice, why we were doing this now? Was this just a game to him? I toyed with the edge of the phone holding my breath in suspense and Eric finally got to the point and explained…

"I know, I know this wasn't your fault, I wish you would have told me earlier, but I know you are just as freaked out as me."

I felt the pits in my abdomen dissolve into stomach clenching hope and I listened on silently…

"I don't care Sookie, I don't care who the father is, I just want us to work. I want to know you want the same thing."

I felt my eyes tear up in that moment. My knees weakened and I collapsed down on a bench outside the clinic. I needed a moment to pull myself together and this bundle of nerves I had turned into and finally I asked him in almost a whisper…

"You don't care? Not even if it's Bill's?"

There was a slight pause but then I heard him reply quietly…

"Things are complicated right now, but the one thing I do know is that. I didn't sleep all night because I was worried I wouldn't be able to tell you…I…I don't know what's going to happen and under the circumstances, Ill understand if you're not ready, but I just wanted you to know that I still love you."

I felt a churning in my chest as the nervous tension turned into joy. Was he saying he was okay with this? That he would accept this baby and me? Had those words Id been yearning to hear for so long finally come out?

One tear filled eye finally gave way, spilling salt water out to one cheek. I gulped, wondering if this was a dream and I confessed with a shake of my head…

"I want what you want."

I wondered how the fates could be so cruel to twist my heart up the way it was at this moment.

Up until now I hadn't fully realized how much I missed him. This rollercoaster ride we were on was a challenge but I could have kicked myself for not stopping him from leaving yesterday. The tears ran down my cheeks because it finally hit me that I could lose him.

But what if this baby was Bills? Maybe Eric could live with it, but could I? What if this baby was Eric's but he was sent away to prison for the next 50 years?

"Sookie, I'm sorry Mr. Cataliades is calling me, I have to go." Eric replied interrupting my thoughts.

"Okay." I answered with a small exhale in an attempt to reign in my emotion and he answered gently…

"Goodbye Sookie, I'll see you later."

I breathed wanting to say so much but I didn't have time, my mind and body a tumbling ball of feelings and I finally replied…

"Bye Eric."

I paused for a moment and then there was silence and I was afraid he had already left and I called him with urgency….

"Eric?"

There was a beat of silence and I began to fear I had lost the signal when he replied…

"Yeah?"

Another tear ran down my cheek and I confessed with heart wrenching relief hoping against hope that I hadn't lost him yet, it wasn't too late for us, that I would have good news to give him when I left this clinic today because I wanted it to be his …

"I love you too."


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: **Im so sorry this chapter was late in coming. It was a very busy weekend with the holiday and I got roped into dogsitting, and well two dogs are not the same as one, lol. But it was fun. The squirt went home tonight and my kid misses her playmate already, lol. Anyhow, thats the reason for my delay. I made this chapter extra long to make it up to you. ;) Hopefully I didn't screw up the legal stuff too much. I totally winged it. This one is another emotionally intense one and alot comes out, I mean a lot. I almost felt like I was giving too much away, but there is still some story to tell, so dont get too comfortable that all is resolved. ;) Anyhow, hope you keep reading and thanks always for the reviews. Enjoy!

**Chapter 22-Q & A**

_EPOV_

She was in my blood. I could still feel her warm breath on my skin as if we had been together only a few moments ago. Her voice flowed through my veins and her soft body caressed my hot skin. That girl could cure world hunger if she wanted to. I couldn't help but wonder what Mr. Cataliades would think if I told him I was more eager to see my girlfriend than to win this trial? Not that I was about to enlighten him, although he was most likely ready to throw the book at me the way I made him sweat it out.

You see I wasn't entirely sure after yesterday if Sookie would be here, and I couldn't really divulge any information about her beyond what pertained to the trial, even after being pressed. I told him he'd just have to come up with a plan B. We all could brain storm together. He called me one of his most difficult clients and he threatened to charge me double for the extra stress I was causing him.

I told him I wasn't an idiot and we had agreed upon a set amount per every hour he spent on this case and signed a contract, and I wasn't about to let him go back on any of that, not unless he wanted to spend more time in court.

But he was a good lawyer, best lawyer in Northern Louisiana in my opinion. So I had hoped my money was well spent. If I got out of this with the skin on my back I was going to have a huge massive party at the bar in celebration and in memory of Godric. I'd even invite Cataliades, if he hadn't suffered from a nervous breakdown first.

I did not really have occasion for celebration since Godric left us. But I knew he would be greatly missed. After talking to Sookie, I dared to hope that kind of future, the one filled with celebrations, and happiness, and love was possible for me.

We were sitting in the courtroom going over the final details of the trial. It was agreed upon by both of us after much debate that no matter what, I was to plead innocent, and we were going to make the DA think she was running circles around us, like the tortoise and the hare. And then when she was good and tired we'd blow her out of the water.

Pam came in through the doors, found us right away, and hugged me. I was relieved to see her and only hoped Sookie would soon follow, glancing back at the clock it was 10 minutes till 1pm.

"Looking sharp darling, we even match."

She mused noting the navy suit I was wearing. I had decided to pair it with a cornflower blue and gold striped tie.

"Only you would notice." I replied smartly.

She was wearing a Dior double-breasted navy dress suit jacket with ruffled trim. The flared skirt had a navy and white large hounds tooth pattern. She carried her large Chanel purse, while clicking away in her muted gold Mary Jane pumps. She was dressed to kill and I could tell she was just itching to get this party started.

Pam set her purse down on the bench behind me and then remarked with game face on…

"So are you ready to kick some legal butt?"

The District Attorney came in at that very moment as if she had just heard Pam. Her assistant was trailing behind carrying all the paper work.

According to my lawyer, her name was Sophie Anne Leclerc. I didn't know her personally, but she had a reputation for being a real bitch. I took a swig of water apprehensively. Sophie looked over at me with a smirk and I shot her a sharp glance letting her know that she was in for a fight. Cataliades glared at her and I turned to Pam wanting to fill her in on the scoop…

"I talked to Sookie, we're…"

But before I could continue we all heard the large door open and close from the head of the courtroom and the bailiff announced…

"Please rise for the honorable Judge Magistrate."

We all stood to face him and Pam quickly found her seat behind me in the aisle behind.

The Judge cast his eyes down upon us and he replied…

"Let's get started shall we?"

I looked back at Cataliades urgently knowing Sookie still wasn't here and then I remarked trying to maintain a tone of esteem…

"Your Honor, with respect, one of my witnesses is not here yet, could we delay until she arrives?"

The judge glared at me and I could tell we were already getting off to a rocky start, when Sophie piped in with…

"Don't worry Northman, we won't be needing her testimony, this case is pretty open and closed."

She winked at me and I glared back at her realizing now that her reputation definitely did not precede her.

"Mr. Northman, my time is very valuable, we need to get started regardless if all of your witnesses are here or not."

The judge explained, and I had no other choice to zip it. It wasn't even 1 yet, but that didn't matter. I sat down begrudgingly and Pam leaned in and whispered in my ear…

"_She'll be here."_

I appreciated her efforts to assure me but at the moment, I was feeling very nervous thinking this couldn't be a good sign.

The judge began with his moderation of the proceedings. He explained why there wouldn't be a jury at this time unless the results of the trial were inconclusive and then this could be stretched out much longer. I was already well informed by my lawyer of the procedure and we both knew if this dragged out my chances of having no prison sentence would decrease rapidly.

We all heard the doors open and close from the rear of the courtroom and my pulse began to speed up instantly knowing whom it was before I turned around because she always seemed to have this effect on me. I could hear my heartbeat echo through my ears. My gaze flicked with Sookie's for a moment and then the Judge replied with a hint of sarcasm…

"So happy you decided to join us."

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

I entered the courtroom, my nerves on fire as all eyes fell on me. You know that feeling when you get to your class late after a hellish and dramatic day, one of those days when you just want to slink back and find some place to hide and be alone and then they all look at you? This was that exact feeling. I tried to find Eric and Pam amongst all those pairs of eyes but the judge was clearly waiting for my reply and I answered with a swallow as I approached the front…

"I'm so sorry sir, I couldn't find the…"

"I don't want excuses, just sit down and keep quiet." He barked back at me.

I glanced at him embarrassed, because this certainly wasn't how I had envisioned things starting off. I know I was running late, but by my watch I still had a few minutes before 1pm. I saw Pam gesture for me to come sit by her thankful to see a familiar face and then my gaze locked with Eric's for a moment and I felt my heart clench in worry. He smiled faintly and I smiled back apologetically, knowing both of us really didn't have a reason to smile at the moment, but I wanted him to know I was here for him.

I slid in next to Pam and she wrapped her arm around me whispering…

"Don't worry about his highness over there, he's just upset this trial is delaying his golf game."

I smiled faintly, relieved she had found some humor in this and I just hoped that my tardiness wouldn't upset the judge further.

And then I sat back and watched.

I'd never been to one of these before. I had the entire drive out here to gear up for this, among the 500 other things weighing on my mind, including the outcome of my child's paternity which lord knows had been the source of many sleepless nights, but it didn't seem long enough. I wondered honestly how much turmoil a person could take in one day. I wasn't sure if I was prepared for this, but the day of reckoning was here whether I was ready or not. I took a deep breath, trying to keep it together for just a few hours longer and channeled the strength that resided from deep down inside my core.

"Now that we're all here, District Attorney, would you please make your opening statement?"

I saw a woman with flaming red hair stand up and pace the floor. She cast me a glare that caused a shiver down my spine and then she replied smugly…

"Of course Your Honor."

She immediately started off with an accusing tone. She said she intended to prove beyond reasonable doubt that Eric was in fact responsible for the murder of Godric Godfrey in the 1st degree, and attempted murder of William Compton. My eyes flared, unprepared to hear that second charge. I clenched the edge of the bench tensely as she carried on with her false accusations, my heart hammering loudly in my chest with every new word. Even I could tell that most of what she was saying was a fabrication. But she had a way with words and spun her web of lies so convincingly; I worried that the judge might actually believe her.

I watched Eric and he appeared as cool as a clam. I wanted to know how he did that. How could he remain so calm? A bead of sweat ran down the back of his lawyers neck as she continued on her rampage, and I knew we were going to most likely need a miracle here.

I saw Eric tense up once when she brought up her theory that he was a sociopath and I realized then that this woman was truly out for blood. My breathing became shallow, nerves fried from this morning as Pam whispered…

"Do not fret darling, He has a plan."

I prayed she was right, because these accusations were blasphemous.

"The prosecution rests I assume." The judge proclaimed.

The witch nodded her head and then darted her eyes back towards Eric casting me a small smug smile as she shuffled her paperwork.

"You're up Counselor." The judge replied to Eric's lawyer, Mr. Cataliades. I had never met the man personally, but Eric had spoken of him to me once or twice. I hoped he was as good as Eric made him out to be because if he wasn't, we were in a lot of trouble here.

He stood up. I took a deep breath and listened growing tenser by the second as he went over the big picture, how the witness had seen Eric before the accidental gunshot went off. How Eric called the authorities right away, explaining that a guilty man would have fled the scene. He explained how the police investigation had nearly closed the case and labeled it a suicide and finally the judge asked him what he wanted to proclaim and he informed him that we would plead innocent.

I took another deep breath as they went over the case piece by piece. Gruesome photographs had been taken. Bullet holes, Godric's dead and pale glossy face looking vacantly into the lens. There were other pictures of him from the side with a sheet covering his bottom half. I could see the pool of blood Eric had described beside the hole in his head and it gave me chills. Finally there was a photo of the wound in his chest. They were so horrific, I could barely imagine what it had looked like in real time, and then I realized that Eric must have had to live with these very real memories every day.

I wanted to go to him and put my arms around him and kiss his temple and protect him from this nightmare of a trial, from that witch of a prosecutor, from all of these demons that chased him, but my hands were tied. His fate was in the laws hands now. I remembered my trip to the church this morning and said another silent prayer asking God to please show Eric mercy. I needed him to come out of this and meet me on the other side. I just couldn't do this without him.

The policeman who had arrived on the scene first was questioned. Then they brought in Godric's neighbor, the one who had seen Eric entering the house. As each witness took his or her turn, I felt more and more disparaged because the false picture that witch painted was so real, I could almost believe it myself.

Mr. Cataliades asked if Pam could take the stand in order to testify on behalf her psychological expertise regarding Godric's mental condition, but the judge ruled against the request proclaiming that if he was not a client of hers it was not factual information of relevance. I had never seen Pam more pissed, threatening to go out and slice the old geezers tires if Eric didn't get off today. If I wasn't so worried, I would have found it funny.

By that point I was nervous like a herd of wild horses before a thunderstorm, this wasn't looking good. Not good at all.

Finally it was Eric's turn to take the stand. The witch was first up and looking quite vengeful in her fancy ensemble. I hated this feeling of dread in my gut. I knew he was trying to be strong, but she was tearing him up inside little by little. I couldn't imagine having to deal with this like Eric had.

"So I guess it's safe to say you've had an eventful few months, haven't you Mr. Northman?"

Eric looked at her nonchalantly. I could tell he was attempting to assert his control over the situation and not give into her accusations just yet…

"You could say that." He replied. She paced the floor, back and forth twice, and then replied while facing the judge…

"Did Godric award you co-ownership of his bar immediately following your employment or after?"

"It was after." He replied.

"So you had to earn Godric's trust before he would award you half of his bar?"

"No." He glared at her…"He was in a financial bind at the time and needed the money so I remained manager until he could get back on his feet again."

"What kind of financial bind?" She asked raising a brow…

"Godric was married, but when his wife filed for divorce, she bled him dry."

The witch smiled and she replied…

"Well now that makes a lot of sense based on the financial statistics of the bar, you two weren't doing so well after you became partner were you, so is that when you decided you wanted to cut him loose and take the money for yourself?"

My nostrils flared as Mr. Cataliades shouted from behind…

"Objection your honor, she's leading him!"

The judge looked back from Eric to the witch as if he was bored and he replied dryly…

"Objection granted. Ms. Leclerc, please retract your statement and find a new line of questioning."

Sophie nodded and looked back at Eric with a fire in her eyes and she announced…

"Question retracted."

"You and Godric had served on a tour of duty in Iraq, is that correct?"

"Yes."

"So why should I believe that you aren't capable of murder when you both were trained assassins, when you violently attacked another man 2 months later while still on parole? The murder weapon in fact was one of your Magnum 9 millimeters was it not?"

"Objection your honor!" Cataliades argued from the side but the judge ruled holding his hand in the air...

"Objection denied Counselor."

Eric glared at her and replied sharply…

"First off, if you are going to insult all the men and women in uniform Ms. Leclerc, make sure you include His Honor who I believe was in the US Armed services back in the Vietnam war was it not?"

Eric looked to the judge who seemed impressed and nodded his head…

"Yes, that's correct. Counselor if you don't stop badgering him, I'm going to have to hold you in contempt of court."

"I'm so sorry sir, Your Honor, I didn't mean…"

"I don't care what you meant, just keep a lid on the trash talk!"

"Yes, Your Honor."

I smiled proudly, happy to see Eric win the upper hand for the moment. And then Eric announced…

"Id like to answer her other question if I can?"

"Go ahead Mr. Northman."

"First Id like to point out that the gun which you refer to was not a murder weapon, it was used in suicide by Godric, and it accidentally went off when I picked it up after the fact. We have been over this 100 times and my answer is not going to change."

He looked back at her sharply; still managing to keep his cool even when he knew the she wolf was out for blood. Then she continued with her questioning…

"With all due respect to your military background, why shouldn't we believe you're some kind of sociopath in sheep's clothing Mr. Northman? Other men and women who have served don't possess the kind of rap sheet you do. After all, this other man could have died out there in the swamps as well. Were you hoping the alligators would take care of your little problem rather than dealing with the press of a shooting this time?"

Pam shook her head and muttered under her breath…

"_She's pitiful."_

Eric's nostrils flared and I swallowed my heart going out to him in this moment. I wanted to jump out of the pew and pull all her hair out. I could see the pain inflicted in his eyes, which reflected back into me as he growled back with a tense jaw tossing her words back at her...

"With all due respect, I don't go around psychoanalyzing people when I don't have any expertise or degree in the proper fields Counselor, and for the 500th time, we both know neither situation involved murder!"

"Well since you offered, why don't you elaborate on your second victim?"

"Objection Your honor!" Mr. Cataliades interrupted.

"Objection denied, I want to see where she is going with this, but keep your self in line District Attorney!"

She looked at him and nodded. I didn't know how it was possible to hate someone so fiercely without even knowing them, but this woman I hated.

"Of course Your Honor." She looked back at Eric like a hungry hyena and she replied sweetly...

"Can you tell us what your motive was for attacking Mr. Compton?"

"He was an asshole."

Eric replied plainly and the judge slammed his gabble down and replied...

"I will have none of that cussing in my court Mr. Northman!"

Eric closed his eyes and the she witch clarified...

"You told the police he was jealous of your relationship with your girlfriend."

"That's true."

"That's funny because according to Mr. Compton's statement, he seems to claim she was his girlfriend, and you stole her away from him."

Eric glared at her and added with sarcasm, clearly playing the witch's game against her by this point…

"Toe-may-toe, toe-ma-toe."

She drummed her long nails on the witness stand and she asked him with one long clawed hand on her hip.

"So, did this man make any threats to you? Did he blackmail you?"

"Blackmail?"

"Well someone must assume if you are willing to steal another mans girlfriend, kidnap him, and leave him for dead, you could commit a much greater act of hostility, such as murder."

"I didn't fucking kill him." Eric spat back glaring at her angrily.

"One more outburst like that Mr. Northman and I'm holding you in contempt of court." The judge declared and Eric glared at him. I clenched Pam's hand because by this point I was afraid. Very afraid. This trial was so volatile, I had no idea where it was going and that scared the crap out of me.

"I believe the evidence speaks against you Mr. Northman. I think you did kill Godric Godfrey and you would have killed William Compton as well had he been tied up by your own hands."

If looks could kill, the DA would be dead by now.

"Your Honor!" Mr. Cataliades chimed, in but it was too late, the damage was done.

"Yes, You have made your point Counselor, (he looked back at the DA and declared) you will refrain from this line of questioning Ms. Leclerc, we all know where you stand."

"This girlfriend of yours, is she here today with us?" The judge turned to Eric and his eyes locked with mine. I felt the pits sink in my stomach, no longer sure I was ready to go up there and face that horrible woman, but on the other hand it would give me the chance to rip her a new one and finally Eric replied with a nod...

"Yes."

"Fine then, I will allow the defense to question you and then we can move onto her."

I felt my stomach churn turbulently and clenched Pam's hand even harder, praying I could keep it together for this.

"Don't let the bad hair and press-on dragon claws fool you darling, she's got nothing, why do you think she's fighting so hard?"

I wished I could believe Pam, but the judge was the one I was concerned about. He seemed to be letting the District Attorney do whatever she wanted. And wasn't allowing Eric's lawyer any chance to argue or object. What if he agreed with her accusations as well?

When she was done with Eric, Mr. Cataliades got up there. I could tell Eric was doing his best to remain strong and not fall under the pressure, but the cracks were starting to show as Cataliades brought in several other pictures of Godric's corpse. These were shots from his autopsy. I almost couldn't look at them, covering my eyes for a moment as I felt a wave of nausea come and go, but then curiosity won out.

It was true, Eric's gunshot did puncture Godric's chest, but had Godric not just shot himself in the head and had gotten to the hospital in time, he would have been saved. It was not a fatal wound. The hole in the head was clearly Godric's cause of death. And after extensive analysis, the investigation did conclude that the head wound was a suicide. There was no way, Eric being as tall as he was, would have been able to make that shot.

I felt a little better, my stomach not as tense, until I realized they were done with Eric.

The judge looked at his notes and he replied…

"Miss Stackhouse, please come forward."

Pam gave my hand a little squeeze and she assured me…

"You'll do fine."

I looked back at her nervously and then I stood up, my palms now sweating. I saw Eric stand, his concerned blue eyes never leaving mine and I felt the pull in my heart strings, now finally understanding what the term "sweating bullets" meant. I prayed that I could get through this. I so desperately wanted Eric to meet me on the other side.

xxxxx

_EPOV_

I had to confess as enraged as I knew I was right now, there was no comparing it to the gut wrenching worry I felt for Sookie when the judge called her name. I saw her stand up slowly. I had survived the questioning, and I had faith in her that she was strong enough, but I still didn't trust the DA. I knew judging from the questions she fired at me that she wouldn't resist 'going there' with Sookie.

When she reached me, I tried to offer her a small smile, my hand brushed her arm, but she was stiff as wood. I could feel the tension rolling off her in waves and I suddenly felt unsettled, questioning my decision to allow her to take the stand. Would Sophie tear her apart like she had me? Could Sookie handle it?

The bailiff brought the bible to her and he made her take the oath.

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you God?"

"I do." Sookie agreed lifting her hand from the bible and taking her seat on the witness stand.

Then all I could do was wait and watch and not think that my whole life was most likely in her hands at this moment.

The red dragon clicked her darted heals across the courtroom floor as if she were ready to puncture Sookie with them after charring her with her fire laced breath and I clenched my fists nervously.

"So, we finally get to meet the mystery woman of this wicked little ménage trois."

Sophie noted with a brow raised in intrigue, Sookie glared at her and, then Sophie began warming her up…

"Miss Stackhouse, how long have you known the defendant? Mr. Northman?"

"Just over a month." She replied sharply in warning, but Sophie was like a snake slithering around her…

"That's a pretty short time, considering the defendant beat up your boyfriend just a few weeks ago.

"So is what Mr. Northman claimed true? Were you also dating him while you were still dating Mr. Compton when this assault took place?"

Sookie's breath shook just slightly and finally she explained…"I had just broken up with Bill."

"Were you and Mr. Northman in a sexual relationship at that time?"

"Objection your honor, this line of questioning has no relevance." Mr. Cataliades interrupted.

"That's none of your business!" Sookie spat back.

But the Judge interrupted her and he replied…

"I'm sorry, Miss Stackhouse, but under the circumstances it would be helpful to know the level of your relationship with Mr. Northman, and I hope I don't need to remind you that you are under oath."

I sneered as Sophie smiled smugly.

Then Sookie looked back at me and swallowed…

"Not entirely."

Sophie chuckled and she replied…

"Would you care to elaborate? I find it hard to believe that all of this would have transpired without a little action, or were you doing them both at the same time?"

Sookie's face tensed up and I muttered to my lawyer…

"_You must get her to stop."_

Cataliades looked at me and he replied…

"_I'm sorry Eric, but this is out of my hands, she's just going to have to sweat it out."_

"_I officially hate you."_

"_If this gets you off, then you might just change your mind." _He answered.

That was doubtful, I thought and then I looked back at Sookie's petrified face. She glanced back at the judge for a moment, but it was clear who Judges pet was and he listened waiting…

"We weren't officially sexually active, but we had gotten to second base and even third, maybe a little more."

"Ah so the plot thickens." Sophie chuckled and she asked…

"Second base and even third huh? Did he catch you?"

"No not really?"

Sophie smiled wickedly enjoying this far more than she should and she replied…

"Miss Stackhouse, we really have to work on your answers, they are very vague, what does not really mean?"

The look on Sookie's face was one of total mortification. She appeared cornered like a frightened animal. Finally after a few long moments pause she replied shakily, her face a fresh shade of crimson…

"He saw marks on my thigh, a hickey."

I looked back at Sookie, trying to piece all of this together, my mind turning things over, the guilt washing over me as I recalled that night realizing the pain it caused her, but she wouldn't look back at me and Sophie smiled smugly and continued to click her heels along the court room floor. She folded her fingers together as she moved on with the bloody massacre.

"So it's safe to say, you were sexually active with Mr. Compton before and after you had engaged in sexual relations with Mr. Northman."

She swallowed and replied nervously…"Yes."

I began to grow restless because I could see what the bitch was doing before she even got to her point. She was trying to get Sookie worked up and frazzled so she could plant words in her mouth. And of course she wanted to prove me reckless and hostile. If I didn't have a motive, why not just get one custom made? I glared back at her as she continued on…

"Do you believe that Bill deserved to be dragged out to that swamp and left for 3 days Miss Stackhouse?"

She looked back at Sophie, brows creased hesitantly and then she replied…

"I never advocate violence, but I can understand why he did it."

"Oh really?"

"And why was that?"

Sookie looked petrified and Sophie declared…

"Because…he hurt me."

Sophie instantly backed off her line of questioning as if she could sense where things were going and she questioned…

"Do you think Mr. Northman would have finished the job had he realized Bill Compton was still alive?"

"No."

_You can bet your fucking life on it…_ I thought angrily.

Her gaze found mine for a split second and Sophie declared…

"So what you are saying really is because your old boyfriend got jealous of your crush on Mr. Northman, you think Mr. Northman was in his right mind to kidnap your old boyfriend, tie him up, and leave his fate to the alligators for three days."

"I..."

"No further questions your honor."

Sophie declared smugly and then she took the seat behind the prosecution bench.

"Counselor, you may cross examine your witness." The judge declared to Mr. Cataliades. Before he left the bench I hissed…

"_Be gentle with her."_

He just smiled faintly and patted his briefcase…

"Thank you for agreeing to be here Miss Stackhouse."

"You're welcome." Sookie replied. She seemed relieved that Sophie had backed down. I couldn't dare warn her that the worst was yet to come. I glanced back at Pam as we watched tensely.

"You told the District Attorney that you had dated Mr. Compton, prior to your relationship with my client is that correct?"

"Yes sir."

"You also mentioned that Mr. Compton hurt you."

"Yes."

"Was it emotional or physical pain?"

She swallowed and then replied quietly…

"Both.'

Sookie looked back at the courtroom doors, she scratched her nose and then her gaze fell to her lap. I could tell she was retreating back inside herself and I closed my eyes hoping she could find the strength to do this.

"Miss Stackhouse, with respect, as painful as this is, could you please describe for us how Mr. Compton physically hurt you?"

"What?" She croaked and then glanced back at me as if I had sold her down the river. My heart sank. No she was indeed not prepared for this. I had never felt more remorse than I had right now and Mr. Cataliades went on as my nails dug sharply into my palm.

"Did he hit you?"

She shook her head, and looked at me as if she wanted my help. I wanted to get up and tell them all to back the fuck off her, but I knew I couldn't. I hated this, this helpless feeling. Pam reached over and put her hand on my shoulder, but I was sure it felt like granite, I was so tense and then Mr. Cataliades went in for the kill…

"Miss Stackhouse? We need to have the big picture here, anything you can offer will help us determine the outcome of this case….Did Mr. Compton abuse you?"

"Objection Your Honor, I don't see how her little squabble with an ex who just got his girlfriend stolen out from under his nose is relevant to this line of questioning."

"Objection overruled counselor." The Judge declared.

Sookie looked back from the judge to Sophie and then finally Mr. Cataliades. Her eyes plead with him to back off, but he wasn't about to let go now.

Her breathing became shallow and I saw her eyes begin to tear up. My heart went out to her. I hated myself for making her do this, this way, in front of everyone like this. I knew she could have told me if she had more time.

"Sookie, this is important…" Mr. Cataliades coaxed her on gently. "How did he abuse you?"

She closed her eyes and then she nodded her head and muttered quietly…

"Yes."

"How?"

"He…he…"

Her voice shook and I could see her search inside herself for the answer. I desperately wanted to go to her and take her in my arms, clenching the table as I held my breath in heart aching suspense as she closed her eyes and finally proclaimed in a little quiet voice…

"He raped me."

"I'm sorry I couldn't hear you." The judge declared.

_Get your hearing aid checked dickhead!_

"Can you please say that again Miss Stackhouse?" Mr. Cataliades asked. I seriously wanted to slug him, because I was sure they all heard it right the first time, my blood now boiling…

"He RAPED me!"

She concluded with another crack in her voice as the tears now fell down her face. She looked at me like I had betrayed her and I felt as if my insides had been dumped in a grinder sick. Now I knew, we all knew. She cast her glance back towards Cataliades angrily…

"I'm terribly sorry to hear that Miss Stackhouse…is that when Mr. Northman challenged him?"

She glared at him, wiping her tears from her face because there was no room for emotion here. I know I should have been relieved to hear her confession because of my trial, but it only drove my hatred for Compton even further, it made me angry that she had been holding this inside herself for so long. It hurt that she felt she couldn't talk to me or any one about it and that she had decided to take the burden all on herself.

"Yes, after he took me to the hospital and Bill came by the next day to apologize, Eric dealt with him."

"Do you believe that is why he lashed back at Mr. Compton the way he had?"

Her emotional eyes met mine and I wish I could have known what she was thinking in that moment, her face was so tempestuous, but under the circumstances, I wasn't sure if she would ever talk to me again and finally she nodded…

"Yes."

"Your Honor, I have no further questions." Sookie looked exhausted but mildly relieved to be done with it.

The judge nodded his head and he replied…

"Well then, if there are no other witnesses, I will…"

"Wait your honor!" Sophie Interrupted him and my eyes shot over to her like a hawk watches his prey.

"I'm not done yet, may I cross examine the witness in light of this new information?"

My stomach sank in dread. No, no, no…she could not. Sookie gave them everything she could. The judge looked over at Sookie and he nodded his head and the pits sank. I had never seen her look more alarmed.

"You may Counselor, but make it fast, I'm not getting any younger, and I believe I have all the information I need to make a decision."

I felt like jumping up out of my seat and strangling her, I jerked my chair in protest causing the Judge to cast me a glace but my lawyer held me back and he shook his head and he muttered.

"_Let her sink the final nail into her own coffin."_

My nostrils flared as I looked over at a smug Sophie. I could tell Sookie was very tense and if rattled any more it was clear she could shatter like crushed glass. But the only thing I could do was watch on in fear. I made a promise to Sookie and myself right then and there, if I got off, I was going to spend the rest of my life making this up to her.

"Thank you Your Honor."

She walked over to Sookie and replied with one brow raised…

"Well you certainly continue to amaze and stun us, and you certainly get around don't you, but how are we supposed to believe your word over Mr. Compton's, he is after all the injured party here who went to the police. Who is to say you both didn't just have a fight and now you want to appease your new boyfriend. You didn't even press charges."

I saw Sookie swallow, her eyes flinched as if she was fighting with all her might to sustain this torture and Sophie concluded…

"I think the court deserves to hear the truth. What constitutes rape to you?"

"_Jesus Fucking Christ!"_

I muttered in outrage. But Cataliades remained silent. I felt like slugging him right now.

Sookie looked back at the judge for help, but he gave her none.

"When one party does not consent to sexual relations."

"Did Mr. Compton force himself upon you?"

Her face was hard as stone, and I had the feeling she would not give Sophie the satisfaction of more tears, replying with clenched jaw, in fact she looked quite angry…

_That's it lover, use your anger to pulverize her._

"Yes, he did."

"But he was your boyfriend at the time was he not? Why wouldn't you accept sexual advances from your own boyfriend."

"This is insane!" I exclaimed this time loud enough for everyone to hear and the judge glared at me, and then he informed Mr. Cataliades…

"Keep your client in line Counselor or his next outburst may be his last."

"The Prosecution may continue." He granted Sophie permission to continue with the questioning. And she concluded…

"What changed? Why did you no longer feel a sexual attraction to your old boyfriend Miss Stackhouse?"

"I changed."

She replied sharply and Sophie concluded…

"I'm afraid that answer like most of your others is too vague Miss Stackhouse. Do you think you brought this on yourself? Why else would Mr. Compton allegedly rape you?"

I closed my eyes feeling her pain lashing out and whipping me with it. The pressure was heavy in the room, like mercury rising on a thermometer, the tension so thick it could be cut with a knife. I looked back at Sookie hoping I could somehow transfer what strength I had left to her. Her eyes flickered with mine for a moment then she looked at Sophie…

"Why didn't you report him, why did you say nothing to the police? What viable motive would he have to attack you, when he clearly makes clear in his statement that he loved you?"

That's when Sookie finally snapped.

"HE WAS JEALOUS OF ERIC, HE WAS JEALOUS OF MY ATTRACTION TO HIM AND MY REFUSAL TO HIS MARRIAGE PROPOSAL, HE WANTED TO PUNISH ME, HE DIDN'T WANT ME TO EVER FORGET IT, AS HARD AS I FOUGHT BACK, HE JUST PUSHED HARDER. HE TORE MY CLOTHES OFF AND BRUISED MY BODY, HE HURT ME IN A WAY THAT GOES FAR BEYOND PHYSICAL PAIN, AS HARD AS I KICKED AND SCREAMED AND PRAYED THAT GOD WOULD SAVE ME, HE WOULDN'T STOP, HE WOULDN'T STOP RAPING ME, UNTIL EXHAUSTION FINALLY OVERCAME HIM AND I WAS ABLE TO GET AWAY! IS THAT EXPLICIT ENOUGH FOR YOU?"

She was met with absolute silence. It was so quiet, one could hear a pin drop. The heaviness in my chest was fighting to burst open while all the pain rage and anger rose to the surface. Tears welled in my eyes as I imagined her being thrown around like a tiny rag doll in that mans arms and I wished again that I had finished the job.

Sophie paused as Sookie stared at her heatedly in challenge, her chest still heaving from her outburst, some of the bite from Sophie's voice gone and she asked more calmly now…

"So why didn't you press charges afterwards?"

Sookie creased her brows clearly at the end of her rope and exhausted and she finally replied…

"Because, I trusted him, I loved him even, at the end of the day he was still my first love, and in a way I felt I deserved it."

My nostrils flared in anger and the blood boiled through my veins as if lit up by a gas burner. I closed my eyes in agony for her, shaking my head in disagreement while she continued…

"If anyone was to blame for what happened to Bill, it should be me, Eric was only acting out on my behalf, he was doing what I couldn't do, he was protecting me."

By that time she had rendered Sophie speechless and the judge asked her, clearly a bit frazzled himself…

"Are you finished Counselor?"

Sophie nodded and replied, looking remorseful…

"Yes Your Honor."

I put my head in my hands not even sure if I could look at the damage done.

I heard the Judge flip through his paperwork and he asked the two lawyers whether or not they had any more information to add to a closing statement. Neither offered any new information.

"Then by the city of Shreveport, 5th district of the State of Louisiana, I declare Eric Northman, Innocent of attempted Murder of William Compton and Innocent of Murder in the first degree, second degree and third of Lieutenant Godric Godfrey!"

I looked up for a moment, wondering if I heard him right, when Pam jumped up out of her seat and she exclaimed…

"Thank you Mary Magdalene!"

The judge looked at her as if she was some crazy person and then she came around from behind and threw her arms around me.

The judge banged his gabble to close the case and then he replied to me…

"Just stay out of trouble, I don't want to see you in my courtroom again, is that clear?"

"I don't think that will be a problem sir!" I answered feeling about 5 tons of pressure lift from my shoulders; still unsure this was really happening.

The judge got up and the Bailiff announced…

"All rise"

We all stood, and then I saw Sookie up there still standing in the witness stand.

xxxxx

_SPOV_

It was if it all was a dream. I still wasn't sure I could believe my ears. I felt such a mixture of emotions pulling me in two different directions. Part of me still reeling from my confession wanting to punch something and the other part of me unable to process what this meant for us now. My head was about to explode as I was left there alone to sort it all out.

I barely noticed as the judge walked out my mind still caught in a haze and that's when I found Eric standing there looking at me. He was free now? He wasn't going to prison? I didn't know what to say. He seemed apprehensive to approach and for a moment I wondered if he was scared to now, after my little outburst I couldn't blame him, but when my gaze locked with his, his long legs closed the gap and his arms reached out to take me.

I literally collapsed as the relief released the pressure stored up inside me. I wanted to cry, I wanted to bawl, but I held myself back because I knew if I did it now Id never stop. So I buried my face in his neck and wrapped my arms around him too.

I couldn't believe this was happening. Everything had been so terrible lately; I just wanted to cherish this moment of peace for as long as we could, before the next piano fell from the sky.

I felt his lips brush my temple. I knew I should feel ashamed for what happened, for what I confessed, for going through all that up there and making a scene, but I didn't care any more.

_Please just hold me like this forever._

I wished silently closing my eyes in order to cap off the new brimming round of tears. His arms felt amazing and strong. It scared me how badly I needed this, but I felt like if he were to leave me now, I could no longer breathe.

Finally after what seemed like no time at all, he pressed his lips to my other cheek and pulled back to look at me. His gaze was turbulent, much like mine, but filled with relief. He leaned back in and then proclaimed…

"You are my Angel…thank you." Eric whispered into my hair and placed his lips softly against my temple.

I flinched not expecting his gratitude so quickly. But dared to look up into his deep blue eyes and see the truth for myself. He didn't find me shameful? He didn't pity me?

To prove it, he took me in his arms again and this time I could hear his rapidly beating heart drumming against my ears.

No other noise had ever sounded so sweet as I closed my eyes again and drowned myself in it.

Finally, I whispered…

"Can we go home?"

He lifted his head up slowly and met my gaze in question, asking reluctantly.

"To Bon Temps?"

Eric looked worried for a moment, but then I explained…

"No…your home."

He smiled; looking somewhat relieved and then leaned in for what I thought would be a kiss, until we were both interrupted by his lawyer Mr. Cataliades…

I looked up at him wondering what he wanted.

"Eric, I cant lie and say Ill probably wont drink myself into an alcohol induced coma tonight because it's the only way Ill ever get a good night sleep with my fried nerves, but if I do make it to tomorrow and don't decide too sue you for the stress you've caused me, Id like to go over some last minute paperwork sometime tomorrow."

Pam came over after Eric's lawyer dragged him away from me and kissed both my cheeks. I wasn't quite prepared so she caught me somewhat off guard and then she replied quietly…

"You did good out there kiddo, color me impressed."

I didn't know what to say, I wasn't trying to impress anyone, in fact I felt quite self-conscious at the moment for airing all of my dirty laundry out for everyone to hear, I was still trying to absorb everything that had happened.

"I'm so proud of you."

Pam added with a smile and then pulled back and put her arm around me. I looked back at her with creased brows, still unsure of what to say, but then Pam said it for me and she remarked her eyes dead serious…

"But if I see Billdo lurking around you ever again, I think I may be the next person going to trial, I never showed you what I can do with a Swiss army knife, it's quite impressive."

She raised her brows in jest.

I smiled faintly, appreciating Pam's ability to make light of the situation, even though I knew there was nothing light about it and I assured her…

"Don't worry, I can take care of myself."

Eric came back to us after finishing up with his lawyer and we all walked out of the court room together, both of us on either side of Pam as she pulled us along, her arms draped over our shoulders and declared…

"I think under the circumstances you two probably want some alone time am I right?"

She looked from me to Eric, and Eric replied bluntly to my embarrassment…

"I'm sorry, but do I know you? Is this true, has the meddler retired?"

Pam rolled her eyes and shook her head…

"I don't know about that, it depends entirely on you two."

She looked back at me and then offered…

"Since you are blowing me off for nookie however, you both better be bright eyed and bushy tailed to meet me for brunch tomorrow."

She glanced back at Eric as if he was supposed to know where this was and he nodded affirming it.

"Cause if you are even 1 minute late, I'm going to drive to your house, use my spare key, interrupt whatever may be going on, and drag both of your bare asses with me to celebrate, am I clear?"

"Yes Pam." Eric replied smugly, and then she looked at me in question and I answered…

"Oh yes, crystal clear."

Pam smiled as if she was satisfied with my answer. We were outside now and I had to find my car, I didn't want to leave it here.

"Ill follow you." I told Eric and he nodded. He looked eager to have me alone. I couldn't say I didn't feel the same.

"Goodnight you two, don't let the bed bugs bite." Pam chimed in teasingly. She felt like an older sister and I almost had the urge to stick my tongue out but I knew I had to act like an adult now. Especially now that we had a very serious discussion ahead of us. I swallowed nervously.

"Goodnight Pam." I replied. Eric blew her a kiss and she smirked back at him. His gaze caught mine before he got into his car across the parking lot and he smiled.

I felt my skin warm and I found myself longing to fall into his arms again. I waved and then got into my own little beat up gremlin to follow him home.

On the car ride I thought about a lot of things, but there was one thing that kept floating back up to the surface. How was I going to tell him? I was nervous as hell.

About 10 minutes later I pulled up to his condo. Eric had already gotten out of his car and was standing in his front doorway waiting for me looking very enticing while he watched my every move. He already had me thinking about other more gutter mind like things and I tried to keep my wits about me, but that was very hard, when a hot Viking god wearing a navy Armani suit was standing there licking his lips casting his girlfriend a come hither look. It had been far too long since we had been together too. And hello, I was pregnant and prone to feeling very horny lately.

I got out, game face on and smiled back at him hoping we would get through this conversation without splitting us up again. I remembered what Eric said this morning, he didn't care. But that was before I knew. Would he still be true to his word once he knew the truth? Things always looked different from farther away, but now that it was reality, would he feel the same? I tried not to work myself up over it as his eyes beckoned me.

Oh god, he looked even hotter close up, and he smelled amazing. I hadn't noticed the cologne in the courtroom, but out here when the midsummer night air blew just right, I felt myself falling prey to him.

I took the stairs up and found myself standing opposite him on the porch. He smiled again, and I smiled, hoping I could get 2 out of 3 of my wishes granted. I wasn't greedy, just 2 out of 3. Keep your game face on Stackhouse, stay on track!

"Come here."

Eric replied simply with a devilish glint in his gaze. I smirked already knowing I was a goner, took one step closer and then he pulled me to him. His lips crashed over mine to my bodies delight turning my mind to mush. The butterflies were back and swarming like a tsunami inside me. I moved my hands to his neck and then I felt the whoosh that went from my lips down to my thighs. My mind was a haze of bliss when he kissed me like that. I wasn't sure if Id ever get the chance to kiss him again so I gave back just as good as I got.

He shot sparks into me, his tongue dancing with mine. His hands desperate to hold me as he lifted my seat up in his arms. This is what I missed; this is what I had been craving all along. My body alive and awake now as if we were two live wires and when we came together, it was electric. I felt my panties dampen already forgetting what it was I wanted to talk to him about as his hands made their way under my skirt. My fingers weaved through his hair and we kissed hungrily.

I knew what was going to happen before it even did. He kicked his door shut and we somehow stumbled back to the stairs. Our mouths never broke contact as we landed with a thump on the 3rd to bottom step. I could feel Eric's hardness grind into my panties. My hands traveled down to the waist of his pants, tugging at the hem of his shirt but before I even got one end out he had my cardigan off. My hair was already tousled and I gazed back at him lucidly.

Oh hell, what was one last Hurrah? We could deal with the grownup stuff after, I thought.

He looked into my eyes as well, those deep soulful blue eyes and I felt like we were seeing each other for the first time.

My breathing grew deeper as his massive hands smoothed out over my shoulders causing a scattering of goose bumps in his wake. He found my zipper in the back and as his eyes flicked sparks with mine he pulled it down. I leaned in to kiss him once more and he unfastened my bra. My body was alive and alert and humming for him.

I yanked his tie loose

There was something about this house that turned us both into two love-crazed teenagers, but I couldn't get enough either.

Within minutes we had undone everything that needed to be undone and then we found that in the right position, making love on the stairs could be quite pleasurable if done properly.

Afterwards we somehow found our way to his bedroom. It seemed smaller than what I remembered, but also cozier. His long fingers drifted over my pearl necklace and Eric mused…

"I think you should wear this and only this from now on."

I looked down at my necklace, my skin flushing as his fingers brushed over my sensitive peaks. Yes I'm sure he'd love that, but unlike him, I wasn't Swedish, and I was going to be a mother now.

As the thought turned over in my mind Eric brought his arms back around me, his fingers continued to stroke me lovingly and he proclaimed…

"I'm so happy right now, you make me so happy Sookie."

I smiled and looked back at him wondering if he'd still feel that way once he knew the truth. My face straightened and I realized I had to tell him. I had to be serious now and face up to it, no more putting this off.

"What is it?" Eric asked me noting the change in my face. I leaned my back against his hard chest as he leaned up on his elbows and watched me in concern…

"Eric, there's something I need to tell you."

His fingers stilled across my arm and he asked me growing tenser by the second…

"What is it?"

I played with the fabric of his sheet, pulling it up to cover me part way because I wanted to at least look somewhat presentable when I told him.

I had to take a moment to pull myself together, to suck it up. This was only the rest of my life we were talking about here. I didn't want to end up like Tara and Eggs; I didn't want to wind up like Arlene and her little army of misfits. Not that her children weren't cute as buttons, but I needed him. I needed him as my rock.

Finally after taking a deep breath, I looked back at Eric and confessed…

"Eric."

His eyes searched mine as if in alarm. Oh God I wasn't sure if I could do this. Yes I could, yes you can. I chanted. Finally I just bit the bullet and blurted out…

"You're going to be a father!"


	23. Chapter 23

**AN**: Alrighty rubs hands together. I stayed home and went into radio silent to finish this chapter by tonight, so hopefully it came out okay. Most of it is from EPOV. We will get more SPOV next chapter. :D It's been a hectic week, so I will do my best to get the next chapter out in a timely manner, but if not you know why, lol.

Oh and I just have to give a little shout out to my recent nightly obsession. If you haven't read Stieg Larssons Millenium trilogy, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Girl who played with Fire, and Girl who kicked the Hornets nest, get thee to the bookstore. OMG they are awesome. I think all female heroines could learn a thing or two from Lisbeth Salander. ;) Anyhow, back to the story. I hope you like it and thanks again to all of you wonderfully inspiring people for leaving reviews. I appreciate it more than you know. Thank you. xo

**Chapter 23 – Learning to Fly**

_SPOV_

"Wwwhat?" Eric gasped

I realized then and there that I should have prepared Eric a bit more because the minute he pushed himself up to look at me clearly from the shock of my revelation, he ended up losing his balance, and fell off the bed landing with a loud thump down to the floor.

I leaned over to glance at him and found him lying there stark naked and flat on his back staring at me stupefied.

"Eric, are you okay?" I asked concerned.

I raised my brows and looked back at him, not quite sure what to think about his response to my news as he looked up at me and he shook his head in confusion...

"I don't understand how do you know? When did you find out? How?"

"Eric, breathe."

I tried to calm him and then he sat up and looked at me in question ordering me with those intense eyes...

"Explain."

I glanced back at him wondering why he seemed so tense; did this really come as that much of a shock? But I brushed it off and held the sheet up over my chest and reasoned...

"Well I was at the OBGYN this morning."

"You were where?" He asked with his voice raised slightly.

I thought he was over reacting just a tad, so I warned him to tone it down.

"Are you going to let me explain or not?"

I was met with silence. I took a deep breath and began to retell the tale from this morning...

"After I spoke to you on the phone, I went to see the doctor and he took an ultrasound to find out how far along I was...He estimated 2 to 2 1/2 weeks. I was still uncertain about the paternity at that point and explained to him I was on birth control. He gave me the standard lecture about how birth control doesn't always work, and then he flipped through my file and asked me if I had been on antibiotics lately. I told him I had, and then he explained that some antibiotics render birth control ineffective, and the particular antibiotic I was on was one of them. The first time we...we made love (I dared to look at him and met his blue steely gaze) I was on my last day of antibiotics."

Eric's brows were creased and I looked back at him curiously, wondering what was going through his mind. I couldn't help but wonder if he was having second thoughts. A sharp pang struck a chord inside me and I began to worry that maybe this news was too much for him. Maybe he really didn't think he could handle all of the responsibility that came along with raising a child. I needed to know what his new role in my life would be, because I just didn't have time to deal with his insecurities too and I met his gaze in earnest. Finally after what seemed like eternity Eric pulled on a pair of boxers, stood up to confront me and he demanded...

"Why didn't you tell me this morning that you were going to the doctor? Why didn't you ask me to come with?"

"Ah I think you were a little busy." I replied sharply upset that he was pushing this back on me, and he shot back with...

"Yes, and you knew that I would be busy, did you purposely chose this morning because you didn't want me to come?"

My heart sunk and my hard gaze flashed with his for a split second in outrage. I quickly slid my legs over the other side of the bed and tucked the sheet I was wearing around my body, fully prepared to make my escape, and I added hastily, clearly upset over this disappointing turn of events...

"I can't believe you are accusing me of this after what I did for you today, that wasn't easy for me you know!"

I was already making my way to the bathroom to find my clothes when I felt his large hand on my shoulder and he spun me around to face him. I felt my breath still in my chest, and I feared I might break out in sobs at any moment.

"Jesus Sookie, I do know, Christ, I know, (His turbulent eyes met mine and I tried to keep my wits about me and not get emotional.) I just wish you would have told me what you were doing is all!"

I looked at him a moment of sharp silence passed between us and finally I proclaimed in defense, getting my bearings back...

"I did tell you, I would have told you earlier had you not seduced me before I even stepped foot in your home!"

He closed his eyes for a moment as if in regret perhaps, and then he looked back at me pleadingly...

"Sookie, I am grateful, I am so grateful for what you did for me today, I still cant believe it, I don't know if I would have been able to do that up there...This just comes as a shock to me…you said you thought it was Bills?"

I looked back at him with creased brows his earlier words still resonating with a sting inside my mind when I straightened myself up, looked him in the eye and replied...

"I did...You and me, well we hadn't been together long, and I always thought it took longer to know, but in this case, it was early, you can ask my doctor if you don't trust me."

His face fell and he looked crushed. I couldn't help but still wonder whether or not he was ready for this. Maybe my expectations were too high; maybe I had put all my eggs in one basket involving him in this too? He placed both his large hands on my shoulders squaring my body to his and he looked at me dead serious, answering...

"It hurts me that you think I don't trust you."

I cocked my head in question because his earlier words proved the contrary, and Eric continued...

"Sookie, Id trust you with my life...I did today and I will do so until the day I die. I...I just had no idea, on the day my life was saved, Id also find out I was going to be a father...You're just going to have to give me a few minutes to let it sink in..."

I met his gaze with uncertainty, because I was sure we had been through this already, and then he let go of my shoulders and sat back down on the corner of the bed placing his head in his palm. I was almost at wits end. We had gone over this already, he told me he was with me on this. If he was going to back out now, I would slug him.

But one look at his dazed expression and I couldn't help but feel for him. I realized the trial had taken up most of Eric's time because he did look pretty drained and tired. I knew he hadn't had much time left dedicated to worrying about this little creature growing inside me. But what did that mean for us? If he didn't have time then to think about this, would he ever? Knots of worry began to form in my abdomen.

I sat down beside him hesitantly unsure if he wanted me to sit next to him and we waited a few long moments. Finally after what seemed like an eternity, he dropped his hand and looked back at me. I dared to glance at him ready for it to come when I noticed a change wash over his face.

I thought I saw his eyes water up, but he was too proud a man to cry in front of me and then he proclaimed...

"We're going to have a baby? We really are?"

I nodded my head.

Eric shook his head as if in disbelief. He stood up and began to walk towards the bathroom but then he turned back towards me. I could tell he was thinking about things because he was pacing. Finally after I felt like I was ready to burst from the suspense of his reaction.

He gasped, smiled kneeled in front of me and threw his arms around me.

It took a few seconds for me to realize what was happening, he was accepting this? Did we just agree to be parents?

I felt the tears well in my eyes as I gasped in relief and hugged him back.

"Does this mean you are with me on this?" I whispered finally after we had embraced for a few long moments.

He met my gaze with creased brows and he asked...

"Was there ever any doubt?"

I laughed because of the irony in all of this thinking about the emotional roller coaster he just put me through and I met his gaze with earnest eyes. His warm soft lips pressed against mine as if to seal his promise and I accepted, hoping that this was the end of our chaotic journey.

The kiss grew deeper and slowly little by little he drew me back into his world. I felt his tongue part my lips and my own tongue brushed his tip. His taste was sensual, his touch erotic, and before I knew it, he had me down on my back. I felt the warmth flood through my thighs as his body pressed into mine, and he whispered against my skin...

"I'm not like them Sookie, I promise you will never have reason to doubt me, I would never try to hurt you."

I held him closer, my fingers clenching his massive shoulders and I prayed and hoped he was right; I didn't want to deal with any more heartbreak. I know Eric didn't want to either.

I pulled him back down to kiss me and replied softly in between kisses...

"I know."

It was if Eric could sense my earlier hesitation and he brought his hand down to rest upon my navel. His touch caused my lashes to flutter in pleasure and then he smiled at me, which made me smile back.

I don't know how he did it, but with one look, he could make me instantly feel better.

"I think it's time I show you how thankful for you I really am." Eric replied his lips caressing my neck. I was already putty in his hands and moved to kiss him in return but instead he began to travel south.

Since I was still covered with a sheet, he moved down to kiss the tops of my feet and then he replied...

"Time to start over."

He began to peel away the layers, like carefully stripping a butterfly away from her cocoon next revealing my knees and he kissed each one causing my body to shudder...

"With a clean slate."

His blue eyes locked with mine and I finally let go of the bunching of fabric at my breasts, the sheets falling into a pool around my body as he moved up to kiss my lower thighs. My body shook slightly as I felt his tender touch, which caused my skin to tingle in delight.

He took his time, much like before, much like the first time we did this, kissing his way up to my aching womanhood. Only this time, he used his fingers as well as his mouth.

As he crept closer to paradise I felt myself grow wet. He teased me with his tongue at first and I pried my thighs open further for him, and then he went in for the kill.

I felt pleasure instantly as his tongue parted me. I didn't want to think about where he must have learned how to do this so well, only that I appreciated it. I felt another shudder pass through my body as my legs dropped, and then all was forgotten.

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

I wasn't going to lie and say yesterday Sookie practically gave me a coronary. I wasn't prepared to win my freedom and find out I was the father of her baby on the same day. Just when I had finally absorbed the idea that I was a free man, Sookie decided to sling another bombshell at me.

You see up until now I had put it in my mind that that asshole Bill Compton was the father. Did I hate his guts? Fuck yes. Did I hate the idea of Sookie having his baby most likely from the worst night of her life, when her complete and total innocence was taken and raped? It killed me a little inside. But then I thought, it's not the child, the child was half her. I mean Saddam Hussein even had children and most of them turned out okay. So I prepared myself for it, I knew I loved Sookie, so I could love her baby. Her baby.

It was comforting in a way to have that distance. As much as I loved her, it was all very overwhelming, the pressure. In the last few months I certainly hadn't felt like a role model. Being labeled a murderer kind of pounded the message into ones head that they just weren't parent material. The kid didn't have to call me dad; he could have called me anything. Maybe 'hey you.' I would have been fine with it.

I'm trying to be delicate here; I am not saying I didn't want to have a kid with her. I'm saying that I didn't know if I was ready. You can bet your two front teeth I won't be confessing any of this to Sookie or she'd go mental on me. Not that I think she's mental. See, this is exactly why I'm not mentioning anything on the subject other than to say I just want to explain. You'll see, you will understand, just read on.

You see I grew up without a father. I never missed mine. In fact most days, I didn't even think about him. On days like Fathers Day, I thought of Fintan.

The man who donated his sperm to my mother, the one who treated her like a one nightstand, and didn't care enough to ever check in on her again could go fuck himself. I had little respect for fathers and hadn't seen much in the form of fatherly love during my adolescent years.

It was easy to accept Sookie's dilemma when I remembered my own child hood. I mean despite having a few minor issues, I think I turned out pretty normal.

But when she told me I was the biological father, it changed everything. I couldn't help but freak out. This meant I was responsible for this little life too. I had never had a father, I didn't know what to do, I had no role models or idols to learn from. For the first time I felt just as blind as Sookie was going into all of this and it made me uneasy. I wasn't used to feeling this unprepared, especially with something so important like raising a child. Not to mention, I questioned whether or not I actually deserved to have one of my own.

There is nothing more unsettling when you think you have everything figured out, you are knocked back on your ass and have to start over again at square one. Points to self, this is me.

I was the kind of man who was ready for anything and everything. I challenged the world, I challenged life to bring me all she had to give and I could conquer it. But this, a baby? I wasn't so sure. This time, this time I was scared shitless.

So here we were, stuck with this dilemma. The dilemma being what now? Of course, I want to stay with Sookie and support her and help her raise our baby, don't even think for a second that I had doubts about that. It's just, I see Sookie like a wild horse. You don't want to approach her too quickly, you don't want to jump on her, or it's going to backfire. So I was stuck with the question. Should we go at this full throttle, do the moving in thing, the relationship thing, the marriage thing and make this official, or should we let it evolve organically.

I can tell you right now, I had no intention of asking her to marry me before I found out about any of this. I didn't even see myself as the marrying type. No offense to Sookie who I love more than life, but we hadn't even been able to make it 48 hours through without some fight. How would we handle something like marriage? Christ, how were we going to handle a kid?

I began to feel that creeping sensation of worry again.

Knowing this however, didn't change the fact that I was not willing to give up without a fight. We had worked damn hard to get here and I wasn't about to set us back. Sookie just helped me win my freedom. We were going to have a baby. I was getting a new life. I wasn't going to fuck this up.

I finished the coffee and set down two croissants on a plate with some butter and cinnamon.

Sookie had settled in the living room so I decided to bring the little snack to her. Luckily she had some clothes in her car, so she didn't have to do the morning after walk of shame. Although, I wouldn't have minded seeing her in that blue dress again. It had to be one of my favorites.

Under the circumstances however, she looked cute as a button. She had my coffee table book about Viking artifacts open on her lap and I looked over her shoulder happy she had taken an interest, ready to explain the significance of some of the pieces, but she had only opened it to the title page and had been staring at it for the last few seconds mindlessly.

I frowned and then she looked up, noting I was standing there.

"I brought something to tide us over, until we meet Pam." I explained in an attempt to avoid suspicion that I had been standing there staring at her all this time.

She smiled and I set down the coffee cups and plate of croissants on the table. As I slid in next to her she replied…

"It looks wonderful…but the doctor said I shouldn't drink coffee…I guess there's a whole list of foods and drinks I can't have."

I frowned and then I asked…

"Can you have tea?"

"I think so, I just have to go light on the caffeine for the first and second trimester."

She set the book down on the coffee table. I wasn't sure if she was entirely comfortable here, I knew it was a change for her, but maybe she really wanted to be with her Grandmother instead. Just when I thought we could be gearing up for another talk she leaned in and kissed my neck.

My eyelids fluttered as the electricity from her soft touch lit me up.

"Don't trouble yourself, I'm fine, I'm exactly where I want to be."

I set down my coffee and smiled, alleviated by her soothing words, wondering if she really meant them. I took her hand in mine and then her soft lips brushed against mine and I kissed her back. Her hand resting on my abdomen was doing crazy things to my insides. She especially encouraged some of my more pressing reactions down south also, as our tongues meshed, and then I drew back and confessed with a smirk…

"You taste like mint."

"You taste like coffee." She countered with a similar smirk, and then I realized since she tasted like mint and had most likely just brushed her teeth that perhaps she wasn't feeling well, that lovely morning sickness again and I asked…

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah why?"

She looked up at me with her large doe eyes and I fell into them.

"You were in the bathroom for awhile after I left."

"I'm fine, I feel much better now that it's out."

I couldn't help but feel bad for her. I hated being sick, like with a passion and Sookie wasn't even complaining.

"How about a nice cup of decaffeinated tea, maybe that would help."

I suggested sitting up wanting to make her feel at home.

Sookie laughed and replied…

"You sound just like my Gran."

I narrowed my eyes and pursed my lips unsure how to take that and she replied…

"I think it's sweet."

She kissed the side of my mouth tenderly and nuzzled her nose into my neck to my delight reeling me back in. I put my arm around her shoulders, realizing she most likely just wanted to spend some time relaxing before we went out and faced the world. I couldn't blame her and leaned my head against hers, enjoying the quiet for a moment.

We settled in and then Sookie confessed her hand rested on my abdomen…

"I'm not quite sure what to tell her about us actually…I mean she knows we are together…I'm pretty sure she knows we are having sex, she asked me if I was using birth control, although fat lot of good that did me."

I looked back at her as she pursed her lips and looked back at me in question and then Sookie asked…

"So how do I tell her I'm pregnant?"

"I guess you just tell her and hope she'll understand."

"But that's just it, usually Gran is pretty liberal when it comes to this relationship stuff, she's always telling me to let go and have some fun, but…I'm afraid maybe I might disappoint her this time…I mean as far as she knows we've only been dating in public for a week and God, I must look like such a tramp."

She covered her hand over her face and I shook my head. Lifting her chin I forced her to look back at me and I replied…

"If you say that about the woman I love again, I'm going to have to tape your mouth shut young lady."

I got a smirk out of her, but it quickly faded as she went back to her troubled mind.

"I just don't see how she will take this well."

"Would it help if I talked to her first, you know warmed her up a bit?"

She looked back at me her deep eyes searching mine and she shook her head finally…

"No I think it would be best if I just told her, like you said…"

"There is one thing we do need to talk to her about."

I offered and Sookie looked back at me curiously. I decided now was as good a time as any to bring up the subject, trying to ease her into it. I attempted to phrase my thoughts into a question, hoping we could agree…

"Where do you want to stay? I know your Gran's house is much closer to work, but it would be nice if I could share you."

Her eyes crinkled into a smile before her mouth did and Sookie nodded. She looked down for a minute as if deep in thought and I wondered what was going through her head. Like I said, I didn't want to push this too hard, so I could only hope she would still want to meet me on the other side.

"Maybe I could stay here on the nights I have off and with my Gran on the days I have to work?"

Yeah, that wasn't exactly the response I was hoping for, but I guessed I walked right into that one. I tried to hide my disappointment; looking back at her she put her hand over mine and assured me…

"Just for a little while, of course pending whether or not she will kick me out of the house after she finds out you knocked me up." She looked at me through the sides of her eyes accusingly, but she couldn't hide her smirk.

I leaned in pretending to bite her neck in punishment and Sookie laughed as I placed a wet kiss on her skin instead playfully…

"Well maybe if we got her to kick you out, you would be forced to squat here, and then I could surely make you suffer."

Sookie laughed and tried to be serious for a moment...

"I know, but she really does need a little help, as much as she denies it…Just for awhile…and I have a feeling if I stayed here full time you might paralyze me..."

She looked back at me with those eyes that made me melt and I replied smartly...

"Lover if you have anyone to blame, its yourself, in fact I seem to recall you jumping me that day by the lake, we didn't even get out of the water when you began your assault if I remember correctly.."

I smirked smugly and she dropped her jaw in outrage.

"I didn't jump you, if I did, you'd know for sure."

"Oh yeah?" I challenged her with a wicked glint in my gaze and she nodded taking the bait, I felt her slip her hands around my neck and straddle my lap...

"Yeah." She concluded with a spark in her eyes. Our noses were mere millimeters away. My hands skirted around her ass, squeezing her cheeks, giving her just enough encouragement and then she was mine for the taking.

Her lips brushed mine teasingly and I was about to lean in for more when she backed away with a wicked smirk of her own, grabbed the hem of my blue vee neck tee and tore it up and off over my head.

I put my hands around her waist, about to pull out her tee as well when she placed her hands over mine and she shook her head. There was that dark spark in her eyes and she replied with tongue and cheek…

"I don't think you understand the rules of being jumped by someone, I have all the control sugar."

I raised my brows and then she proceeded to pull at the hem of her own tank. It must have had a built in bra inside because when it came off she was completely topless. Her nipples were hard, her breasts full. I could have sworn they were bigger and that's when I felt the stiffness in my pants go completely rigid.

"You like?" Sookie asked softly, sensually and I wondered who this confident and tantalizing young woman was.

Pregnancy certainly suited her.

I nodded, trying to avoid drooling and I answered meeting her gaze…

"Not like, love."

Her eyes flickered for a moment; I could tell she was teetering on the edge of something.

And then just like that night, she pounced.

Her lips pressed hotly against mine as I fell back onto the sofa. Sookie fumbled with my zipper and I helped her as I shimmied out of my pants.

She was frantic, I couldn't help but touch her breasts as she came back up to me, her lips smothering mine once more and then I could no longer resist. I helped her be rid of the last 2 items. Her short shorts and panties dropped quickly and then we were both goners. My cock was no longer yielding and I almost lost it right there. She was such a turn on, she had no idea.

Then we both groaned as she finally sunk me into her pushing down.

_Oh God!_

It was amazing, like snow falling on Christmas morning, but even better. I sat up to pull her closer to me, my tongue diving into her mouth as she ran her hands along my back. She continued to ride me, slow and steady, raising her hips and thrusting forward, she made me see stars. It was unbridled and raw and real, we were real. I couldn't help but smile at that moment realizing then that I could be just fine with this arrangement if every night was like this. Her gaze met mine with a spark, and then we lit the fire.

Sookie tossed her head back in ecstasy as I felt my own climax build from within. I pushed her down, a man now possessed as she took me under her spell and then we continued on our quest to make more hot passionate smoldering intensely erotic mind blowing love.

xxxxx

About an hour later, Sookie and I finally peeled ourselves off from the couch. Once I had my pants back on I dared to take a look at the clock noting the time.

"Shit!"

"What?" Sookie asked me concerned while buttoning her frayed denim shorts.

I looked back at her and replied…

"We have to meet Pam in 10 minutes and we will never get there in time."

Sookie looked at me hesitant for a moment and now it was my turn to ask her…

"What?"

She tossed me my shirt in an effort to help speed things up, which I appreciated and then she confessed…

"I don't know if I'm ready for the whole world to know yet, I mean…I already have to gear up to tell my Gran today."

She looked at me with those large doe eyes pleadingly and asked…

"Do you think we could put off telling Pam and everyone else for a few days, maybe wait till next week? Just so we have time to adjust to our new arrangement before everyone jumps in with all the questions."

I looked back at her, thinking she did have a point. It would be nice to have as much peace as we could get while we could get it. But I knew Pam; she wouldn't take my lack of forthcoming well. Plus she was pretty intuitive. Odds are she may have even already spoken to Sookie's friend Tara or her boss.

I pulled my shirt over my head and finally replied…

"We don't have to tell her, but that's not a guarantee that she won't find out."

Sookie bit her lip and nodded her head replying…

"Well I can only hope that she doesn't, but I would appreciate it nonetheless."

I nodded in agreement. It was clear she had me wrapped around her little finger.

I leaned in to kiss her forehead and her lips caught mine. Her hand reached up to caress the side of my face and she had me spellbound all over again.

"Thank you."

I nodded about to go in for another kiss when I saw the clock move forward another 2 minutes. I knew Pam would make good on her word. If we weren't there she'd send out a damn search party and be all up in our business giving the FBI a run for their money. I wasn't about to let Pam get her upper hand back and pulled Sookie along with me.

"C'mon, let's go."

Xxxxx

Fifteen minutes later we were standing outside the hang out, which also happened to be the bar I owned.

"You own this bar?" Sookie asked me astonished.

"Yeah." I replied and she looked up at the grand entrance curiously, which was partially made up from the bow of a replica Viking ship.

"Jason told me about this place." She remarked. I looked back at her in question, wondering what her brother was doing here, but she didn't say anything more on the subject so I left it at that.

I took a deep breath unsure I was ready to face everyone just yet, but there was no time like the present, and I wanted Sookie to meet the crew, so I took her hand and led her inside.

"Eric?" Sookie turned to me and explained…

"I'm sorry, but I have to use the little girls room, Ill be right back."

I nodded pointed to the restrooms and went off in search of Pam and that's when I ran into the first familiar face.

"Oh my God! As I live and breathe, Eric!"

Ginger came around the hostess counter to hug me, which turned into more of a tackle and we started talking.

After a few minutes I saw Pam in the background tapping her foot by the bar, with hands on her hips. I knew that look. We had kept her waiting and now there would be hell to pay.

"Hi Sookie, nice to see you again." Ginger replied with a bright smile on her face over my shoulders. I looked behind me and Sookie took my hand. I couldn't help but smile, despite knowing we were just about to go into the lion pit with Pam.

"Hi, Ginger right? Nice to see you too." Sookie answered politely. I took Sookie's hand and nodded over to Pam in gesture explaining to Ginger…

"Sorry, have to jet, you know who is getting impatient."

"I heard about the trial, there was a blurb about it in the paper this morning, so happy to have you back again Boss."

"It's good to be back." I replied with a smile over my shoulder as we made our way over to the bar where Pam was standing.

"Hi Pam." Sookie greeted her cordially, but I could tell Pam was in no mood for politeness at the moment.

_Here it comes._

"I was about to have them send out an Amber alert, but I didn't want to waste the taxpayers money when they should really spend it on installing a fire hydrant outside your condo, you know so I can come over and hose you both off when the occasion calls for it. You both are screaming post coital sex hair flunkies right now!"

Sookie's face turned crimson and I replied with sarcasm…

"Good to see you too Pam."

"Hmmf." She snubbed me for a moment turning her nose up in the air, but I wouldn't back down and continued to stare at her. Finally after a few long moments, Pam finally gave up.

"Oh come here you idiot, both of you!"

Pam replied surrendering her anger she hugged me first, planting a kiss on my cheek. And then she hugged Sookie, kissing both her cheeks.

"So you both survived the night, that's good. Maybe we can make it to 48 hours this time?" She mused turning to the bartender.

"Boss, you're back?"

I turned my attentions to the counter and noted Chow standing there.

"Yes, apparently so." I answered with a smile.

The large man with tattoos up and down his arms came out from behind the bar to give me a huge bear hug.

I was a little taken back because Chow wasn't really the hugging type, but I patted his back, and replied…

"Thanks for not letting the place burn down." Chow laughed and patted my shoulder as he took a step back…

"Well it's the least I could do." He winked back at Pam and smiled, and then all eyes seemed to fall on Sookie. She had been looking at the décor which I'm sure caught her eye, it would catch anyone's eye and then she noticed they were all staring at her and she quickly closed her gaping mouth.

"Sookie, this is Chow, he is the bartender here at Freyja's, the Manager, and a good friend of mine."

Sookie looked hesitant at first to take Chow's tattooed hand but I nodded encouragingly and she graciously accepted…

"It's nice to meet you Chow."

"So this is the new blood huh? Not bad Northman, a little skinny, but I can see what's been keeping you away for the last month."

Sookie's face colored again and I put my hand on her back. I was sure this was all a bit overwhelming for her. I told Chow, I'd catch up with him later. Tomorrow I had to come in and cook the books, and then I explained to Sookie who was still mesmerized by the very original dance floor that portrayed the constellations in silver.

"This place is a bar and grill by day, we are known for the best brunches in Northern Louisiana, and then after 10pm, it turns into a night club. I pointed to the silver statue at the head of the dance floor that portrayed a woman in a winged helmet riding a horse, with one sword raised high in the air ready to strike. "That's Freyja. You will have to come here at night to experience all this place has to offer." I winked.

I pointed to the framed Viking armor that decorated the halls, and explained…" See Freyja is a Nordic Goddess. She represents beauty and love and destiny, but also war. Those frescos back there portray old Scandinavian folklore." Against the backdrop, rock formations, trees, plants, and animals look out from behind the foliage. The mountains and the lightning represent Thor, and over here, the pine trees and those wolves represent Odin, God of the hunt."

I looked back at Sookie who looked overwhelmed and I concluded...

"I can show you the rest later, although I promise, it looks like a completely different place at night."

"I believe you." She replied breathlessly.

She put her hand in mine and I remarked...

"Let's go get something to eat, you must be starving."

Sookie smiled as we walked back to the bar, and Pam met us with 3 bloody Marys on a tray.

"I thought we could start with these, after yesterday, I'm sure we could all use it." Pam smirked. She set the tray down on the bar and took off a glass handing one to me and then one to Sookie, and then I remembered that Sookie probably shouldn't drink that and I reached out to block her...

"No, she ca..."

"I'm okay." Sookie replied at the same time I put my hand over the glass. Pam looked at me oddly obviously baffled by my reaction and I replied...

"She doesn't like those." I offered, taking a swig from the glass quickly hoping Pam would just drop it and I announced in an attempt to change the subject...

"Why don't we order?"

We found a booth. The tables had coasters in the shape of all the Nordic deities, and I handed Sookie one of the silver metal bound menus.

We cracked them open and I watched Sookie study it all. Pam waited unable to withhold her commentary from the peanut gallery she replied...

"There's something different...I can't quite put my finger on it, but it's different."

I saw Sookie take a nervous sip from her glass of water.

"Well of course there is, this is the first time Sookie has been here." I replied trying to get Pam off the scent. Sookie smiled hesitantly back at me and she replied...

"Yes, it is and I have to say, it's beautiful, Eric I understand now why you are so proud of this place, my brother was right."

I smiled and put my arm around her knowing what I wanted to order without even having to look.

"So what else did your brother say?"

Pam raised her brows and she replied…

"Somehow I can't quite picture your brother in a place like this, he'd have to get past Longshadow first before we let him in."

Sookie smirked and she shook her head and answered defending Jason…

"I know he comes off like some redneck hick, but sometimes even Jason can surprise you."

"Now that I'd love to see." Pam mused and she looked back from me to Sookie.

A waitress came by to take our orders. She was new and fumbled a bit with the specials, but did an overall fine job.

"Ill have Thor's Hammer Brunch, the egg white farmers omelet with cheese, sausage links, and whole wheat toast." I replied. She smiled sweetly and took down my order.

"Oh yes, I think Ill try that too, but can I switch my toast to biscuits with gravy, oh and can I upgrade the waffles to the chicken fried waffles, and also can I get a huge glass of grapefruit juice?"

"You got it honey." The waitress replied.

Pam raised her brows in amazement and I looked back at Sookie equally baffled but she just handed the waitress her menu. She took Pam's order, pancakes with fruit and bacon and then she was off.

"You must have been up all night with an appetite like that." Pam mused and looked back at me coyly.

"I'm just hungry, I didn't get to eat much yesterday." Sookie confessed, her cheeks flushed and I nodded my head in agreement.

"Yes, that's right, we were in court for most of the day."

Pam nodded her head, one brow still raised and I began to grow weary of her suspicion. She looked all of the sudden like the cat that ate the canary.

Sookie finished her water, set it down and then she looked back at me apologetically and replied…

"I'm sorry, I need to use the restroom again…that water just went right through me."

I glanced back at Sookie knowing this was not a good time for her to abandon me. She was about to leave me cornered here with Pam, but she looked like she genuinely had to go so I slid out.

"That sounds like a good idea, my drink is empty, Sookie, since I'm going to the bar is there anything I can get you, maybe a gin and tonic?"

Pam called after her but Sookie just shook her head and smiled politely…

"No, I'm fine, thank you though."

I almost felt like putting my head in my hands, because I could see the realization cross Pam's face before it even happened. And poor Sookie was clueless.

"I knew it!"

Pam sat down opposite me and she smirked smugly…

"She's pregnant isn't she?"

I looked up at her remembering my promise to Sookie, and I replied trying to cover my own back as I looked out towards the bar…

"I'm not really at liberty to say…"

Pam laughed and she replied clearly in her element loving the kaleidoscope of discomfort painted across my face…

"At least tell me it's yours and not Billdo's."

I scratched my nose in gesture that she was correct and she smiled broadly…

"As I live and breathe, you are going to have a baby?" Pam exclaimed happily putting her hands over mine. Of course other patrons heard and I hissed…

"Pam keep it down, Sookie doesn't want it to get out yet."

Pam laughed and she replied…

"Sookie is going to have to learn sooner or later that she cant control everything, and she's going to have to pick her battles, because this is just too good to sit on."

"Her Grandmother doesn't even know yet so Id appreciate some tact."

"Of course, no one in Bon Temps has to know." Pam smirked and I glared at her.

She shook her head still in disbelief and asked me…

"So have you talked about long term stuff yet?"

"Sort of." I replied.

"What does sort of mean? I swear you two are exactly the same, vague, reclusive, internalizing, you are either going to live happily ever after or drive each other insane right to the nut house…"

I sighed knowing this was coming and answered…

"She's going to stay with me part time, until we get things figured out."

Pam's brow furrowed and she looked back at me with a frown.

"She's going to stay with you part time? Does that go the same for the kid, are you going to file for joint custody too?"

I sighed knowing Pam was unhappy with this arrangement and I explained…

"She doesn't want to leave her Grandmother alone."

Pam rolled her eyes and she replied…

"That's just an excuse…Adele can practically do cartwheels around other Grandmothers her age, I actually saw her riding one of those john deer tractors the other day at the Sheriffs house when I was heading back to work."

I creased my brow and I asked her…

"So what do you think I should do?"

Pam sighed and cursed herself. She looked at me and replied…

"I thought you wanted me to chuck the shrink stuff."

"I meant what do you think I should do as my friend?"

"Well we both know you can't touch that girl with a 10 foot pole of psychological analysis without her going bonkers. Although I still need to talk to her about that rape. It's not healthy for her to keep all that bottled inside. And it would do you good to talk about things too, but I know…(she put her hand up to stop my objection) I know how you both feel.

Pam focused her attentions back on the question at hand and replied…

"I guess…(she paused for a moment in thought and then she replied…) If it were me, Id give her a week, 2 weeks max to get her shit together, and then I'd pounce and tell her she has to grow the fuck up and try to make things work with her baby daddy."

I looked at Pam with brows raised let out a sharp exhale and replied with sarcasm…

"Yeah, I'm sure that approach would go over real well, got any other bright ideas?"

Pam smirked and she replied…

"Well you could always tell her the truth about Fintan and Adele, that might shake things up when she finds out what a rocking swinger her grandmother was. It would probably have Miss Perfect running back into your arms faster than you can say gotcha!"

I looked back at Pam sternly not thinking that was funny at all. She took the swig of the 3rd Bloody Mary sitting on the table and then she replied shrugging her shoulders…

"It's just an idea."

I stewed over things for a moment and then the waitress brought out our orders.

A minute later Sookie came back with a cheerful expression and she remarked…

"Okay, those are the coolest bathrooms I've ever seen, the water from the sink actually runs into a rock slab that flows into a fountain."

I forced a smile as Pam sat there cool as a clam, one brow raised, just eating this all up like popcorn, and Sookie slid back in next to me taking a sip from her Grapefruit juice…

"So what did I miss?" She finally asked brightly.

I looked back at Pam, and Pam glanced back towards me leaving me with absolutely no idea how to answer that question.


	24. Chapter 24

**AN: **For those of you who were thinking we were going to get an easy transition period for these two, hehe...If you know me at all you will know by now that Id never let you get away with something that easy. Dont hate me. I am a fan of the cliffy's. ;) Anyhow now that I have hopefully wet your appetite, I hope you enjoy it. Eric and Sookie are so much fun to watch and read, and the messes they make together are equally as entertaning, lol. Thanks again to all my fabulous readers. And thank you for reviewing. I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. xo

**Chapter 24 – Don't Panic**

_SPOV_

I glanced back at Pam noting the way she was looking at Eric and me. Then I knew I must have just walked in on something. Something they were so obviously trying to keep hidden from me and I replied taking a stiff seat next to Eric…

"Okay, out with it you two, I wasn't born yesterday, what's going on?"

Eric looked back at me his eyes frozen and then I began to grow worried. What now? I thought trying not to panic because bad things seemed to happen when he looked at me like that and then finally Pam offered…

"Eric was just telling me y'all were moving in together, part time that is." She smiled at me smugly. I looked back at both of them still confused, trying to absorb it all and then I made the assumption that Eric had been talking to Pam about our personal business. I began to grow worried that Eric had told her about the thing I made him promise not to.

"Oh did he?" I replied, meeting his gaze with clenched jaw, trying to contain my simmering anger, taking his hand in mine in order to prevent my hand from slipping and dumping the contents of his drink in his lap by mistake and I asked her tensely…

"And did he tell you anything else?"

I squeezed his hand tensely, letting Eric know that my earlier gesture was anything but tender and he shouldn't get too comfortable just yet.

Pam laughed and she shook her head. She took another sip of her Bloody Mary and replied…

"You mean like why you've refused your favorite drink on the day after the most stressful of your life? Or why you have to pee every 10 minutes, or why you have decided to order the entire menu just because you're hungry?"

My jaw dropped, and Pam replied with that all knowing smug smile…

"Cat's out of the bag Darling wake up and smell the stretch marks!"

I felt a rage boil inside me, shoving Eric who was sitting next to me I replied in outrage…

"I can't believe you told her!"

"I didn't!"

Eric argued.

I tried to slide out of the booth because frankly I was pissed right now. I specifically asked him to keep quiet about this and who was the first person he decided to blab the news to? That's right, his ex!

But as I tried to make my escape I yanked on my arm which by extension became Eric's very strong arm and I realized he wasn't letting my hand go, which meant I couldn't make my escape and he spoke my name…

"Sookie…"

"Relax Blondie, the signs are everywhere, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to guess that you are knocked up. And actually it explains a lot. But I have to say the mood swings are quite unbecoming. You are so quick to judge him, don't you think Eric deserves a little credit, always jumping to assumptions that he is out to do you harm?"

"Pam that's enough!"

Eric hissed. I looked back at Eric in confusion and Pam replied putting her hands in the air…

"It's none of my business, and I am sincerely happy for you, but you have to both get your heads out of your asses before this baby comes or the poor kid will wind up inheriting all your baggage, you don't want that do you?"

I looked back at her feeling guilty all of the sudden. I looked down at my plate relaxing my grip in remorse. I didn't really think I was being unreasonable expecting Eric to keep quiet, hence my anger wasn't unjustified, but maybe she was right, maybe I did tend to shoot first and ask questions later with Eric.

I let go of Eric's hand and finally I looked back at him and replied…

"Eric, I'm sorry, I was upset, I didn't mean to jump to conclusions."

His face fell and he replied wrapping his arm around me…

"Sookie, it's fine, you don't need to apologize."

He looked behind him, most likely to make sure none of his staff was around. It had to be embarrassing to air your dirty laundry out like this at work. I knew all about that. And put my head in my palm in frustration.

It was just…Just…I couldn't put my finger on it, but something was bugging me and unfortunately Eric had born the brunt of that anger. I wasn't angry with him, I knew that now. And yet here he was telling me sorry wasn't necessary.

"Yes, I do, and you have to stop being so sweet…"

I decided right then and there to make things right bringing my hand around the back of his neck, my lips brushed his softly at first catching him off guard and then I felt him relax and kiss me back. His lips sent warmth through me and I brought my fingers through his hair to kiss him with more passion.

"Are we going to have to get you two a room?" Pam asked clearly uncomfortable from the PDA, still seated at her spot on the booth across from us and I smiled smugly knowing the kiss did exactly what I hoped it would with the added bonus of making Pam just as uncomfortable as she made us at times.

"Maybe, we'll have to see." I answered.

Eric raised his brows, and then I looked down at the tantalizing food sitting in front of me suddenly starving and I replied knowing at least my spirits had been lifted…

"Let's eat shall we?"

Eric smiled at me in amazement, and he took a forkful of his omelet brought it up to his mouth and concluded…

"Bon appetit!"

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

Our brunch was as pleasant as could be once we broke the ice a bit. I knew it was only a matter of time before Pam found out anyway, so at least that alleviated further stress on my side of things by not keeping it from her.

I had to admit it was nice to hear Pam and Sookie talking about every day stuff. Once Pam offered Sookie Obstetrician suggestions in the area, Sookie was enthralled. The way Pam made it sound, it felt like were buying a car rather than trying to find a doctor, but I realized it was important. The baby's health was extremely important. Although I confess it was so blatantly obvious that neither Sookie nor I knew anything about any of this stuff, but I was relieved to have a friend like Pam, who I knew would be there for both of us, and the baby, whenever we needed.

Granted, I wasn't sure how she would handle diapers and all the day-to-day things, in fact I knew she'd tell me to take a hike if I asked her to babysit, but maybe she wouldn't mind assisting with the big picture stuff

After brunch, I showed Sookie the kitchen. She compared it to Merlottes, but said 'It was the Cadillac of bar and grills' which I assumed was a compliment, even though I thought those cars were dreadfully ugly, and then I gave her a private tour of my office.

If Pam hadn't been standing right outside with the rest of the waiting crew, I would have given her the full body tour but I figured there was time for that.

We didn't get out of there until 3:30pm. It was clear there was a lot of work to do and I assured the staff that I would be in tomorrow to go over everything. Chow had done a decent job in my wake, but there were things even he could not do, things that needed my approval, my signatures, and my attention.

On the way back to Bon Temps, the drive was quiet. Sookie had drawn back into herself and was looking out the window with a glossy expression on her face. I knew she was nervous about telling her grandmother. I figured she might even be having second thoughts, and I tried to assure her…

"You know she loves you no matter what right? Even if she doesn't take it well immediately, she will come around…"

Sookie looked back at me forcing a half smile and she nodded faintly, still looking as if she was miles away from here…

"Yeah, I know." She replied softly.

I got off the highway and turned onto the Service road that led to Sookie's place and I assured her while watching the road.

"If things go bad, you always have my place, and Ill be there…to support you in whatever you decide to do."

I dared to sneak a look spotting one lone tear roll down her cheek and that's when I decided to pull over.

Sookie obviously didn't notice we had stopped because my voice and my touch startled her.

"Hey…"

I put my hand on her cheek, smudging her tear mark and I asked her…

"Sookie look at me please."

She did as I asked and then I noticed how tormented her face looked. My eyes melted with hers and I replied…

"We are in this together okay, I'm not going to let you do this alone."

I pulled her into my arms and she nodded…

"I…I just don't want to let her down…" She whispered against my neck and I replied…

"That would be impossible."

"This is all happening so fast and none of it was planned."

"Most things in life aren't." I answered and she shook her head and buried her face in my neck…

"I'm sorry, I know I'm being silly." Sookie concluded and I shook my head…

"Yes, you are. Ridiculously so."

She pulled back and looked at me with a lopsided smile replying in warning...

"Watch it now."

I smirked back at her and I answered…

"Not a chance, when I get a smile like that."

She laughed lightly and I shook my head and declared seriously…

"Come here."

Sookie's smile faded as she met my deep lingering gaze leaning in towards me as I leaned into her. Then I brushed some of her long blonde hair away from her shoulders and assured her…

"You'll do fine, if you can stick it to Sophie Anne Leclerc, you can certainly handle your own Grandmother."

She smiled and then I leaned in to kiss her, but before my lips pressed to hers, Sookie remarked in pause…

"How did I wind up with someone as wonderful as you?" She asked meeting my gaze dismay and I replied with a smirk…

"I don't know, I ask myself the same question every day."

Sookie laughed and she replied putting her palm to my face…

"You are so full of shit."

I couldn't argue, maybe I wasn't exactly telling the whole truth, but I wasn't lying either and I answered…

"Perhaps everyone is to a degree, but right now I don't care, right now I just want you to shut up and kiss me."

She raised one brow and then finally succumbed to the pressure, her lips touched mine softly at first, I felt the warmth flood my skin and then I went in for the kill and we kissed as long as we could before we had to come up for air.

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

We got to my Grans house just a little before 4:30. The little detour Eric and I had taken, helped my nerves, but I still had that pit stuck there in my stomach. Unfortunately, nothing Eric could say or do could make it go away.

My Gran was someone whose opinion I held in high esteem. Possibly, her opinion was the most important to me because she was in essence my sole guardian; she had raised me since I was a little girl. She had seen everything my brother Jason and I had gone through and had done her best to make our childhoods as normal and as loving as possible.

We had our problems, but I always knew my Gran was there to give me sound advice whenever the occasion called for it.

So when we pulled up outside and I saw Jason's truck parked outside, I had to take a moment to gather my wits. With Jason being here, that meant he was going to be privy to the news as well. What the hell, Pam already knew, why not everyone else, I thought in bitterness, which made me feel even more on edge.

Eric took my hand on the walk up to the front porch but I waved him off because I felt like I needed the space to breathe and replied…

"I'm okay, I can do this, it's just like ripping off a band aid."

Eric chuckled and went ahead to open the door for me.

"After you lover." He replied with a charming smile, and in that moment I pictured his perfectly handsome face belonging to the devil. The one who romanced me and charmed me into this mess in the first place. And now he was going to change everything, whether I was ready or not.

I took a deep breath as if I was about to submerge under water and then I entered the house. Right away I smelt pot roast cooking in the oven, and then as we closed the door behind us, I heard voices coming from the kitchen. It was Jason and my Gran.

I set down my purse, glanced back at Eric once nervously and then walked over to the kitchen.

"Aren't ya makin some of that pecan pie for dessert too?"

"I just made pecan pie last week Darlin. We can't have it every week. If you don't like my sweet potato pie, then don't eat it…"

I took one step in the doorway and my Gran's face lifted to meet mine. Our eyes flashed for a split second and then a smile fell across her face along with a twinkle in her eye as she spotted Eric behind me…

"Well as I live and breathe! It sure took you two long enough, but I'm old and I don't have time for small talk so come in here and give me a hug!"

I smiled faintly and then swallowed my rising nerves.

"Hey guys." Jason replied casually and I smiled at him.

"Hey Jase." I went to hug my Gran and then she hugged Eric and remarked…

"See, I knew you'd get off, I just knew it, I was prayin for you."

Eric smiled and replied…

"Yes, I can still scarcely believe it, but I appreciate your good thoughts."

She smiled and hugged him again and kissed his cheek…

"Oh honey, we've missed you around here! So can you fill us in on any of the details? I saw in the paper it was a closed trial, but someone must have given them an interview."

Eric nodded and replied…

"Yeah, that would be Pam."

"Wait a minute, what trial?" Jason asked shoving a buttermilk biscuit in his mouth. I looked at him strangely and my Gran replied…

"Boy, where have you been for the last 2 weeks? Livin under a rock?"

Jason glanced back at us confused and we explained to him what had happened to Eric. When we were done, Jason finally replied…

"Oh yeah, that makes sense then, that's why Eric left all the sudden…I was wonderin."

He winked back at Eric and I just had to shake my head because even when Jason was lying he looked stupid.

I sighed and my Gran took out a pitcher of iced tea and she replied…

"Well now that Eric is free, I think we all have a little celebrating to do, Eric, what would you like for dessert? I have pot roast in the oven cooking for dinner, and biscuits and collared greens.

Eric shook his head not wanting her to trouble herself and replied…

"Whatever is easiest for you…(But then he looked over at Jason, and added…) But I am very fond of your pecan pie."

Adele smiled and replied…

"Consider it done. Now sit down you two and take a load off!"

We sat down at the table and out of the corner of my eye I saw Jason roll his eyes. I felt mildly bad for him, but not enough to really care. I still felt the pressure in my chest and knew I needed to get this out before it ate me alive so finally I replied anxiously…

"Gran, there's something else I/we need to tell you."

My Gran looked me straight in the eye, handed me a glass of tea and she asked raising her brows…

"Oh? And what is that sweetheart? Did you two decide to move in together?"

I glanced at Eric and Jason replied taking a sip of his tea…

"Why would they want to move in together?"

I looked back at Jason getting more nervous by the second. Eric put his hand on my leg, wishing somehow that he could help, but he couldn't and I finally replied…

"Because, I'm pregnant, and no we aren't moving in together, not yet anyway."

At that moment we heard all the crickets chirping outside because it was so quiet in the room it gave me chills. I figured I was on a roll, so why stop now? Closing my eyes once as I attempted to escape the tension with my mind, biting the bullet I continued…

"I just found out two days ago, when I went to the doctor to have a check up. (I dared to look at my Gran because she was the one who told me to see a doctor in the first place and then I concluded…) I'm about two and a half weeks along, its still really early so there could be complications, but they say I should be able to carry it to full term if nothing goes wrong. Eric is the father and he fully supports this, we haven't quite figured out living arrangements, but I still want to stay here for the time being…"

"Wait a minute, am I getting this RIGHT?" Jason all of the sudden stiffened, his chest puffing out, I had never seen him so angry and he glared back at Eric.

"YOU KNOCKED MY SISTER UP AND NOW YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE COMMON DECENCY TO TAKE HER IN?"

"Jason, that's not…" I tried to argue, but he cut me off…

"NO, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT, NEXT YOU'LL BE TELLIN ME YOU DECIDED TO DATE OTHER PEOPLE TOO!"

He got up out of his chair making a loud noise and headed for the back door.

"Jason Thomas Stackhouse, you get back here this instant!"

My Gran exclaimed from the kitchen counter, but Jason was too steamed to listen. This was bad, this was real bad. Especially when Jason was walking out on dinner. He never did that. I worried if Jason felt this way about things, how would my Gran feel?

I met her gaze fearfully wanting to smooth this out and I offered…

"I'll go talk to him."

"No." Eric objected standing and he replied…

"I'll talk to him."

His blue gaze locked with mine and I knew he wanted me to have this time alone with my Grandmother to explain, although I still wasn't sure I was ready and swallowed nervously. He nodded towards my Gran and replied…

"Don't go anywhere, Ill be back."

My Gran gave him one stiff nod and then she looked to me as the back screen door slammed behind us for the second time.

My heart was pounding so fast as she came over to take a seat next to me at the table and she asked me to confirm…

"So you are pregnant? You know this for sure?"

I nodded, and then immediately felt the water works come as I plead with her hoping she wouldn't be too mad at me…

"I'm so sorry Gran, it was an accident, neither of us had planned for this, I know how disappointed you must be right now, but please know, I plan to take full responsibility for my actions."

"Oh Sookie."

Her turbulent gaze met mine and I knew it was coming. This was what would hurt the most, and finally she proclaimed…

"First of all, you don't have to apologize to me for any thing. Do you think life ever turns out the way we planned? If it did, you and your brother wouldn't be here right now."

I looked back at her in question and she sighed and replied…

"The lord works in mysterious ways, sometimes accidents have ways of turning out to be blessings in disguise."

I nodded, appreciating her attempt to console me, even though I knew I had dug my own grave and finally she concluded lifting my chin up to look at her…

"Sookie, you are 28 years old, this is hardly a teen pregnancy, don't worry, you have family and friends who will support you here, but what worries me is that you are trying to take this all on your self. Does Eric want no part in the child's upbringing? Why don't you want to move in with him?"

I met her gaze in question wondering why she was asking me this, I thought it was obvious, but I wasn't about to point out that I was staying because she needed me and finally I assured her…

"Of course Eric wants to help, he wants to be a part of the upbringing."

"So you don't want to be with him, is that right?" She asked me. I creased my brows wondering where she was getting this from and I shook my head…

"No, of course I do…it would just be more convenient for me to live closer to work, for now…" I added trying to sugar coat things. But her gaze was still stern and she asked me putting her hand over mine…

"Sookie? Do you love him?"

"Yes, why are you asking me this?"

I asked feeling defensive all of the sudden. I wondered if she didn't trust my judgment, which I could understand in a way after the predicament I had gotten myself into, but I had hoped she didn't think me the type to just sleep around with any random guy and then she nodded her head as if accepting me and she replied…

"That's good. I just don't want you to do anything you don't want to do…I know all about trying to make everyone else happy, but the thing is, you make yourself very unhappy, living for other people."

I wasn't quite sure what she was getting at and I replied…

"No, I'm happy, I guess for the most part, I'm also terrified, but things have gone much better than I had expected them to."

She nodded and looked back at me with her soulful eyes and she asked me thoughtfully…

"So you want this baby, and you want to raise it with Eric?"

I nodded my head and then she asked me…

"This is your home Sookie, I don't ever want you to feel that you aren't welcome here, but I'm not sure I fully understand why you don't want to live with Eric?"

I looked back at her still uncertain why she was asking me this. My Gran as far as I knew wasn't a traditionalist, but maybe she really did believe that no matter what the father and mother must be together. This baby was created out of wedlock. Maybe she saw me as living in sin if I had already gotten knocked up and wasn't married. I closed my eyes afraid of where to even begin when we heard Jason's truck fire up outside. His tires screeched along the gravel and then he roared out. I knew this couldn't be good. I looked back at my Gran worriedly and then sure enough, a few moments later Eric came back in looking defeated…

"Well that didn't exactly go like I hoped it would." Eric remarked, taking a seat next to me and Gran replied…

"He just needs time, I don't think he even knew you two were dating."

I frowned part of me feeling bad because I hadn't really prepared Jason for any of this, but in the same sense, I was angry that he was turning his back on me.

I sighed, Eric put his arm around me and then we both looked at my Gran.

"I apologize for the suddenness of this news, obviously we didn't have much time to prepare for it either."

Adele nodded and put her hand on Eric's…

"Like I told my granddaughter, there's no need to apologize to me…"

"I know you wanted me to take things slow Gran, I…" But she held her hand up to stop me and she shook her head…

"I won't pretend to say this news hasn't come as a surprise. I knew you two were close. I wasn't sure you were in it for the long haul though…(She paused for a moment and looked back from Eric to me and then concluded…) apparently sometimes the universe has a way of course correcting however, and I'm happy for you both. You have my full support in whatever you decide to do. I'm sure your brother will come around too once he realizes that the world doesn't revolve around him."

I smiled feeling relief as the tears swelled in my eyes. I stood up and hugged her…

"Thank you Gran, you have no idea what that means to me, to us, to both of us…"

She leaned in and kissed my cheek and reached over to wrap her other arm around Eric…

"I just can't believe I'm going to be a Great Grandmother, suddenly I feel so old."

"Well at least you don't look it." Eric replied.

I smiled and glanced back at Eric whose eyes were filled with mirth. For the first time it really clicked for me that we were going to be a family. Eric was my family now. My smile softened as I watched him interact with her and then I asked my Gran...

"So what can we do to help out with dinner?"

xxxxx

Eric convinced me to go back to his place with him. It was our last night together for a while. Sam had me scheduled every day until Sunday afternoon and Eric had a lot of work to catch up on. I knew this wasn't exactly the ideal solution, I wanted to see him more and I knew he wanted to see me. But for now, this is what worked best.

Since we were trading off our nights, I had brought an extra toothbrush and some toiletries to his place, along with a few extra changes of clothing. I figured it would save me time later on, and I could just go to the store to buy more of what I needed at home.

Eric had been a total sweetheart. He even cleared out half of his dresser and made room in his closet for anything I might want to hang up. His thoughtfulness earned him a few extra hours of love making when we were together. I had to admit, my libido was through the roof lately, so I didn't exactly mind the extra attention.

Wednesday after I was finally able to peel myself out of Eric's arms, grab breakfast and hit the road, I stopped back home and changed into a clean uniform

And now that I was back in Bon Temps, my body certainly noticed his absence, especially that first night away from him. My breasts actually ached and I woke up in the middle of the night reaching for him after a bad dream.

But things eventually got a little easier. Work kept me busy at night and by day I helped out my Gran. Thursday, Tara and I had a girl's night, which was fun. I really needed that time to get away from things and the intensity that my life had become lately.

She told me Jason had swung by her place on Tuesday night on a tear about me and Eric and I apologized for that. I hoped Jason would come around but so far he hadn't. I ran into Bill on Friday at Merlottes, but thankfully I was too busy to talk to him. By Saturday I was so ready for Sunday. It was my last full day at work and then I had Monday and Tuesday off which was great because Eric's bar, Freyja was closed on Mondays. Once my shift ended Sunday, I planned on heading straight to Shreveport, spending the remainder of the weekend and start of the new work week holed up at Eric's place.

It was true what they said, absence did make the heart grow fonder. I was really starting to miss him.

Eric had been calling me each night after work. I found myself looking forward to those calls. I had been working so hard; they helped get me through my days.

Which is why Saturday night after work, I made sure to have my cell phone turned on. It rang just as I was getting my keys out of my purse. He was a little earlier than normal, but I was excited, I wanted to tell him about the appointment I made with one of Pam's OBGYN friends for next week, hoping he could come with. I answered it without even looking at the caller id.

"You couldn't wait to pick up where we left off yesterday could you Cowboy?"

"Sookie?"

My face fell when I realized the voice on the other end wasn't Eric's. But I did recognize it, my cheeks coloring a complimentary shade of pink.

"Bill is that you? How did you get this number?"

I didn't remember giving it out to him, but he simply replied...

"I know Sookie, I'm sorry, I know you want to keep your distance, but I have to talk to you, it's really important."

"I don't think that's a good idea." I replied feeling a little uneasy but Bill plead with me...

"Please Sookie, I promise, I just have something I want to give you...I never got a chance to give you your things back, and well, I was hoping we could start over, as friends, or at the very least neighbors...I hate thinking I cant even wave if I see you walking through the cemetery or that we cant shake hands at church...I know I screwed up, this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but I'm hoping you can meet me half way here...I just want to say I'm sorry once and for all and start over with a clean slate."

I sighed not really wanting to go over to see him, but I certainly didn't want him over at my house either and Bill begged one more time...

"Please."

I gritted my teeth looking at the clock on my phone hoping I could make this quick. I didn't want to miss Eric's call. I only had 16 hours left and then I was his fully and completely his. Thinking of him helped me get through the unpleasant thoughts of seeing Bill again.

"Fine, meet me at the Texaco in 20 minutes."

I clicked off my phone not giving him a chance to respond and then I folded my cell back into my shorts pocket. I didn't want to be alone with Bill, but felt that the only way to get him off my back was to entertain his ridiculous notion.

About 15 minutes later I was outside the Texaco, I had gone in to grab a slurpee, because I was dying of thirst and hot as hell and then went back out to finish filling up my gas tank.

Bill pulled up in his new jeep a minute later and stepped out with a polite smile on his face.

"Hi Sookie."

His gaze met mine and I glanced back at him, taking a deep breath because I just wanted to go home and curl up with a good book.

"Hello Bill." I answered reluctantly. There was a moment of silence as he stuffed one hand in his pocket and he asked me cautiously…

"So…how are you? How are things going?"

I could tell he was uncomfortable, so was I, Christ you think they made the business of breaking up easy for a reason?

"I'm fine, never better...(uncomfortable pause…) Um, wasn't there some stuff you wanted to give me?" I answered wanting to get things moving here. I wasn't in the mood for chitchat or stretching out the awkwardness.

His gaze lingered on mine, his voice uneasy as he looked down at his shoes and he added…

"Right…Of course…"

He reached into his jeep and pulled out a small box. It didn't contain much, just a tee shirt, an old toothbrush, a couple CD's and a pair of sunglasses.

"The house has felt really empty since you left." Bill remarked gazing at the box of artifacts longingly.

He raised his eyes to meet mine with yearning and I almost felt sad for him, but for some reason I couldn't. I took it from him and mumbled a…

"Thank you for getting these back to me."

He met my gaze earnestly and exclaimed…

"I meant what I said on the phone Sookie, I would love for us to be friends again…I know I hurt you, and I know I don't deserve to even be talking to you, but especially now with what is going on in your life, you are going to need all the help you can get. I want you to know I'm here for you no matter what, come hell or high water..."

I knew what Bill meant and finally I just let it spill out, tired of the tip toeing…

"The baby isn't yours Bill, it's Eric's."

The moment I looked up I saw the crushed darkness fill his eyes and he looked down at his feet again, sinking into the concrete partition in defeat. I felt bad for lashing out and finally replied…

"Bill I'm sorry things didn't work out for us…I really wanted it to, but there was something missing…"

He pinched his nose and looked back at me with watery eyes. I didn't realize at the time that his fingers were holding back his tears. He blinked hard, and I didn't know what to say. I reached out to touch his shoulder wanting him to know I hadn't intended to hurt him, I never wanted that…

"Bill…I.." Began but he shook his head and looked back at me through blotchy eyes, his voice filled with emotion…

"I don't care Sookie, I love you…You were the first one to make me feel alive again…I…cant just forget that…I think about that night every day of my life, that night I hurt you…Do you know how horrible it is to not remember something so treacherous?"

His eyes met mine and now I could see that he was in fact crying. I knew this was hard for him, but I also knew he had to get it out and I sat down on the concrete partition next to him with my hand on his arm in empathy.

"I cant trust myself, I…I don't deserve your love after what I put you through…I want you to know that day will haunt me for the rest of my life…I don't know why you didn't press charges with the police, but I assure you if it is any comfort to you that the hell I'm living, the nightmares I relive every single night, the flashes, my fragmented memories, living with the knowledge of what I did to you, the woman I love…is far worse than any jail cell."

He put his head in his hands and shook for a moment and then concluded…

"Somehow I hoped even after all of that, by some miracle Id get a second chance and we could start again…And…when…when I found out you were pregnant I thought that was my chance…Only I knew it was too soon for us to try to repair the damage done, and now (his voice shook he looked out at the road and he continued…) Now our ship has sailed and I've lost you forever…"

My shoulders sunk and I felt bad for him. I didn't know how it was possible, especially in light of what happened between us but just now I had seen a glimmer of the Bill I used to know. Somehow those old feelings came rushing back and I remembered how I felt when I was with him. Cherished, loved, the center of his universe.

But I wasn't that girl anymore, I was different now. In fact I'm not quite sure I ever was that girl. He just wanted me to be someone I wasn't.

There was a long moment of silence that passed between us as I leaned into him and put my arm around his back, my eyes scouring the dark ink waters of a pothole for answers, but nothing ever came and finally I replied…

"I'm not comforted by your misery Bill…I want to see you happy too…"

I wasn't sure I was getting through to him because there was another long pause and finally Bill took a white envelope out of his jacket and he handed it to me, pulling himself together he replied after a sniffle…

"Here…I want you to have this."

"What is it?" I asked taking the envelope from him hesitantly and then examining it. It felt like a letter but I wasn't sure and he just shook his head and replied…

"Just do me a favor and wait till you are home to open it…It's everything I wanted to say to you but never got the chance."

I creased my brows reluctant to take it, but I guessed this all came with the business of breaking up. I hadn't done this before and I owed us that much. Despite what happened between us, Bill was my first love and I couldn't change that.

I worried about his state of mind, he seemed pretty down and out but it really was no longer my place to say anything, so in closing, I reached over hugged him and whispered…

"Take care of yourself Bill…Everyone deserves a second chance at happiness, even you."

"Sookie!"

He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly, burying his face in my neck he replied in desperation…

"I am going to miss you so much, what will I do without you?"

I bit my lip feeling sadness for him and looked back at him and I answered with earnest eyes…

"You will start over again, you'll do things that make you happy, like volunteering and singing in the church choir, you'll keep yourself busy with chores and work, until finally one day you decide you are ready to step out again and find someone else to be happy with…"

He looked at me for a long time and finally nodded his head in acceptance proclaiming…

"Yes, that's what Ill do."

Bill offered me a weak smile, we both stood up and I smiled back thinking of Eric as 'my someone else' and I felt my own yearning pang for him. I looked down at my phone thinking I would call him when this was all over since he hadn't yet called me.

"You really love him don't you?" Bill asked noting the way I was looking down at my phone. I saw pain in his eyes but I didn't want to lie and I replied gently with a blink…

"Yes."

Bill nodded, looked down at his feet, turned three quarters moving away from me as if he was leaving, and then he stopped in his tracks and added glancing back at me…

"As long as he makes you happy Ill keep my distance, but if I find out that he hurt you, I'll close that gap in a heart beat."

I looked back at him knowing he meant well, but that remark was pretty ironic coming from him actually. Nevertheless, I was sure I could take care of myself, and Eric would never hurt me like Bill had. So I just let it go, turned from him and headed back to my car muttering a…

"Good night Bill."

Before I got in and drove away.

xxxxxx

EPOV

Of all the nights for a wolf chase they had to pick this one. I thought with annoyance as I navigated my way through downtown Bon Temps, which was made up literally of one block of stores, a police department/fire department, a funeral home, and one lone gas station at the end.

I figured Sookie would be done with work by now. I wanted to surprise her and show up on her doorstep waiting. But the damn animal hunt got me sidetracked. I took a bite of my apple and turned into Main Street.

I followed the detour when I spotted Sookie's yellow Gremlin parked at the gas station, my pulse rate picked up. I hadn't expected her to be here, but I thought this would be better. I could still surprise her, if I could resist passing her by that was. I smiled like a fool and half debated on just shocking her here but thought my original plan was better.

I saw her come out of the gas station and my heart rate quickened. That Sam Merlotte certainly knew what he was doing when he chose those skimpy little waitress uniforms because seeing her in just her tight white tee and those short shorts had me practically drooling for her. It had been far too long since we were properly acquainted. Whether her Grandmother was home or not, I knew of several reclusive locations where we could reunite in sacred primal ways.

I was just about to pass her trying to act coy, which was hard to do in a 2009 Red Corvette, and that's when I saw Bill Fucking Compton get out of his own vehicle and approach her out of my rear view mirror.

I hit the breaks almost instantly and turned back around swinging carefully into a parking spot along the street. At first I couldn't see them, because his jeep was blocking my view but then he sat down on the concrete partition and she soon followed.

My skin began to grow heated as I watched it all unfold. What the fuck was he doing with her? What the fuck was she doing talking to him? Why was she talking to her fucking rapist? I wanted to kill him.

When she put her hand on his back, my blood began to simmer with jealousy. I debated going out there to put a stop to whatever bullshit this was. He was most likely making another ploy for her. I mean what kind of a man cried like that? It was pathetic. But I didn't want Sookie to think I was stalking her, she was sensitive enough as it was.

I growled under my breath and almost lost it, when he handed her a white envelope and then she went to hug him. My anger now boiling, I thought about getting a gun from Sookie's place and finishing the job I started. I couldn't even fathom what was in that envelope or why she was even entertaining taking it from him let alone hugging him.

He seemed to have forgotten my earlier warning about what I was going to do to him if I ever saw him touch her again.

My nostrils flared and my pulse began to race with adrenaline, still unable to believe what I was seeing with my own two eyes. I watched them part ways, Sookie getting into her car and Bill Fucking Compton shutting his own door. It was reminiscent of a dream, or maybe more like a nightmare, but I couldn't stop looking. It was like watching a train wreck.

I got out of my car, my eyes burning into his jeep as he drove away. The apple in my hand now turned to mush as my fingers loosened their grip and it dropped onto the ground. I felt a rage, I hadn't felt since the day after Sookie was attacked and I wanted nothing more than to feed that rage, coddle it, and engulf it, like flames devoured a burning house, my anger was blistering.

I looked down from the remains of the smashed red apple to red of his taillights, which blurred my vision and then I saw blood.

I was going to kill Bill Fucking Compton.

The only question on my mind was where to start first.


	25. Chapter 25

**AN: **Sorry for the delay kittens. Summer is crazy busy, and I wanted to take some time to get back to these two characters because I was starting to veer off course. So hope you dont mind the time out. Things are back on track now for the most part. You can be the judge. And dont worry E wouldnt kill anyone unless he had a really really good reason too. :D So keep that in the back of your mind. ) Anyhow, hope you enjoy this one. The title is inspired by my new favorite Brandon Flowers song. I encourage you to check it out! Thanks again to all the reviews and feedback and sticking with me. I really appreciate it. You guys rock. xo

**Chapter 25-Crossfire**

_SPOV_

I didn't know why but when I left that gas station, I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my chest. I had faced Bill again, and stood my ground. I didn't turn into some bumbling raving mad fool like I thought I would. I didn't lash out either. I had maintained a level head. I felt like I could do anything if I put my mind to it.

I pulled up in my driveway and my phone fell out of my pocket as I unbuckled my seat belt. I lifted the red phone in my hand and my thoughts turned to Eric and how he must be still slaving away at work. I only wished I was in Shreveport right now because I suddenly had the urge to see him, if only to ride out this feeling of accomplishment with him I smiled to myself and opened the door.

I got out of my car and noticed all the lights were off except for the porch light. I knew my Gran had to be asleep but she always left the porch light on for me when I got home late.

I took a deep breath and walked toward the front door inhaling the sweet balmy Louisiana night air and then sat down on the porch steps. It was so nice outside I leaned back against the wooden railing and took a deep breath, savoring my earlier moment. I shut my eyes for a few minutes enjoying the peace and then decided it was time to call Eric because he hadn't yet called me.

I looked down at my phone and dialed Eric's number. I didn't care if he was still at work or swamped under a pile of paperwork, if I could just hear his voice I knew Id rest better.

I put the phone up to my ear and let it ring, every chime building up my anticipation…until finally on the last ring I heard something clicking followed by his voice…

_Clip…clip…_"Soo…kie? …_clip_"

His voice sounded far away and I could barely hear him through the rustling and blasting music in the background and I spoke up a little louder to let him know we had a bad connection…

"Yes, Eric it's me, I can barely hear you, are you in the bar?"

"No, I'm not at the bar."

Suddenly I heard the music stop and I wondered what was going on, Eric sounded funny and I asked him concerned because he wasn't at work…

"Is everything okay?"

"No." He answered flatly and I began to grow worried…

"Eric what's wrong? Where are you?"

I could hear my heart beat echo through my ears with each deafening moment of silence and finally he replied with a sigh…

"I was in an accident."

"Oh my God, Eric! Where are you?"

I got up taking my keys back out in order to unlock my car door, so I could meet him, my heart now racing anxious to see him.

"Old Parish Road." He finally replied and I stopped my brows creased in confusion.

"You're in Bon Temps?" I asked him in question wondering why he was on the road leading to Bills house and then I heard a long pause…

"Eric?" I asked again wanting him to answer me and finally he did reluctantly…

"Yes, I'm just south of the lake."

I thought about asking him what the hell he was doing here in Bon Temps without even contacting me, or why he was on the road to Bills house instead of mine, but I didn't want to think about that now, I just wanted to make sure he was all right and I proclaimed.

"I'm on my way."

I clicked off my phone and rushed to my car. I wanted to get to the bottom of this, but I couldn't concentrate if I was worrying myself to death so I stuck my key in the ignition, revved up my old Gremlin and headed back out into the night once more.

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

I collapsed against a tree in exhaustion when Sookie hung up on her end. I was fine for the most part, just a few scratches, my knee gashed, but I would survive.

I looked back at my car stuck in the ditch below and I felt defeated. I crouched to my knees, now tired and very sore, and held my head in my hands.

It was still all a blur, I was so angry I could barely see straight, my foot pressed the gas all the way to the floor, I saw his blazing red tail lights like the burning embers of hell and the next thing I remember, I was flying through the air my car attempting some Dukes of Hazzard like stunt.

I was chasing after Bill, I remember that now. As I thought of him my blood started to heat once more and then fucking Cujo came jumping out at me.

I saw headlights in the distance knowing it was Sookie before I even spotted her car and I pried myself up.

She slowed down and pulled over to the side of the road. I felt reluctant to look at her, sneaking a peek at her feet as she got out of her car and shut the door behind her but then I couldn't look any more, and that's when I heard her pace quicken under the gravel and then I dared to meet her gaze. The intensity in her eyes stunned me and as she threw her arms around me in gratitude I gasped in surprise and relief as my heart melted right there on the spot, all my anger fading away when I had her in my arms and I held onto her more securely…

"You scared me to death." She confessed.

"Are you okay?"

She pulled back and looked from me to the car back to me with concern and I just stared into her eyes. She looked like an angel, her blonde crown illuminated by the headlights behind her, I could barely even remember why I was standing here with scratches all over my body let alone my name, and she asked me again…

"Eric? Are you okay? You're not hurt are you?"

I blinked her voice bringing me back to reality and I shook my head…

"No…I think Ill have to get a tow truck to pull the Vette out of the ditch though."

She looked back at the car and then her eyes flicked with mine and she brought her hand up to the side of my face, soothing away all my tension she asked me softly…

"What happened?"

I stared at her hard knowing I couldn't lie to her and I explained…

"A fucking wolf jumped over my car and I swerved and before I knew it, I was tipped over in a ditch."

"Oh sweet Jesus." She exclaimed...

"You could have been killed." She shook her head and then glanced towards the woods behind me, tensing up she asked…

"Do you think it's still out here?"

I shook my head and replied tiredly…

"No, the damn thing practically flew over my roof, when I got out of the car I saw it standing there watching me and then it took off like a bat out of hell…It knows they are looking for him."

"They?"

I blinked rubbed my eyes turned back to face the empty road and explained…

"The State Patrol…They had part of the highway closed in order to conduct the wolf hunt."

She met my gaze earnestly, pausing for a moment and then she turned to face me, took my hand and then she asked me the inevitable…

"But why are you on the road to Bill Compton's house?"

My heart started to pound in my head and my palms started to sweat. I didn't want to lie to her, I couldn't lie to her, so I began with an exhale…

"I was on my way to see you when…"

But before I could continue a wolf howled off in the distance.

Sookie grabbed my hand frightened and she proclaimed…

"Let's get out of here, you can tell me when we get back to the house."

I looked behind me for the lone wolf, but couldn't see anything. I didn't feel we were in any danger, but Sookie tugged on my arm pulling me back to her car…

"C'mon."

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

The lights were still out except for the porch light and I didn't want to wake or worry Gran so I put my finger up to my mouth before I carefully opened the porch door cautioning Eric in an attempt to avoid making any noise.

Eric followed my lead and we made it inside. I set down my keys on the small table against the wall and then I took Eric's hand.

The truth was, I didn't really care why he was out on Old Parish Road tonight, he was safe, he was here, I had a long night we could talk in the morning. Right now I was just relieved he was okay.

We ascended the stairs quietly in the dark and I breathed a sigh of relief when we got to the top. Eric made a creak on the wood behind me and I cringed stopping for a moment frozen in silence to watch the bottom of my Gran's door for light, but it never came.

I tugged Eric quickly to my bedroom and closed the door behind us, breathing a sigh of relief when I realized we had made it undetected. Sneaking around like two teenagers wasn't really what I had in mind for the night but I knew I just wanted to find a safe place to stay, and it was pretty obvious by now that we wouldn't be able to keep our hands off each other for much longer. This night had just been too crazy.

I turned to face him and before I could utter another word he put his hands on either side of my face pulling me to him for a passionate kiss.

I felt my knees wobble, pulling back before I lost my balance I looked at him in the darkness, the moonlight illuminating his perfect blue eyes and I could see that his desire matched mine.

"I missed you so much."

I confessed in a whisper. He smiled as if he was relieved and then he kissed me again.

The next time we came up for air, I pulled my shirt up over my head as he pulled his shirt off. My pulse was racing with anticipation as he quickly unzipped my shorts and then I reached over to unbutton his denims.

His skin was burning and I just wanted to touch him and run my hands along his entire body.

He was already hard, and when he shoved his pants down my eyes widened in awe. I couldn't help but stare and note that yes he was extraordinarily hard indeed.

He helped me slip out of my bra my full aching breasts already pebbling in anticipation of his touch and then my lips found his once more in desperation.

I felt him lift my ass up into his arms but our lips never lost contact and he placed me on the bed. I had been in such a hurry to touch him, my body now humming for his energy I didn't have the chance to remove my shorts or panties.

I wrapped my hips around him instinctively as we kissed. His fingers caressing my neck lightly, and then he lowered his hands, touching, fondling, and kissing my perky breasts.

I felt a warmth flood my thighs and I pulled his head up to meet mine deepening our kiss. My tongue slid over his, one hand on his neck the other caressing his perfect ass and then his hand dipped down into my panties.

I shuddered when I felt his fingers enter me.

All thoughts of the past and those bad feelings of other men touching me disappeared when I realized the only thing I was thinking about was the pleasure Eric was giving me at the moment, not anything else, and it was amazing.

"You're so wet." He spoke with hot breath against my flesh and I moaned, signaling the first wave of pleasure. He did something I had never felt before twisting his fingers around inside me causing more pleasure, more friction, more desire…

"Mmmmffff." I groaned again this time a little louder. _Oh god he felt so good._

Eric smothered his lips over my mouth and I realized he had taken into account something I hadn't.

My Gran was just down the hall, I remembered in my foggy haze.

_Who knew sex could feel like this! _I thought, clamping down on his tongue in order to muffle my additional moans of pleasure.

He quickened his pace undoing me layer by layer, I just couldn't hold back any more my muscles clenching and relaxing as he carried my body away with him into orgasmic bliss. Until finally I gasped in his mouth and my final moment came.

We lay there for a minute his hand still resting in my now drenched panties, a few moments of silence passed between us and then Eric replied…

"I missed you too." He confessed with a glint in his eyes and then he kissed me again.

I reached between us and tugged my panties down in an attempt to remove the last layer between us. He helped me pull them off and moments later, I remembered what heaven really felt like.

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

I woke up to the sound of an engine firing up outside. Sookie's window had been left open and I recognized the motor that belonged to her Grandmothers pick up truck. I knew then that we were alone and we had only a few precious hours before we both had to be at work. I exhaled.

Being with Sookie was like being addicted to something incredibly potent, she was like no drug known to man. I was so hopelessly hooked on her. Her smell, her touch, her feel, her perfect body…She didn't know how beautiful she was. All I wanted to do every time I looked at her was ravish her. I would do anything for her.

I loved her so much.

I began to trail kisses along the back of her neck softly and she moaned moving her body in order to press directly against mine and I felt as if this was exactly where I was supposed to be right now. I could certainly get used to mornings like these, and spooning, I thought happily inhaling her sweet scent.

She tugged on my arm, pulling it up to her head so she could use it as a pillow and I trailed more kisses along her shoulder blade. I moved my hand down to rest in between her thighs playfully stroking her silky skin.

"Are you awake?" I asked her gently waiting for a murmured reply.

She didn't say a thing but I saw her lips twitch into a smile and then her foot slid along my leg and her ass rubbed over my naked cock. She totally knew what she was doing. I smirked to myself, looking down at her, I noted her eyes were still shut tight. I ran my free hand over her hardened nipples and whispered into her neck, licking her artery and then speaking…

"I'm so glad you are asleep right now lover, I cant wait to have my nasty way with you…Just stay put and Ill be back with the handcuffs and strap on."

She dropped her jaw and turned her face to look at me in disbelief, and I couldn't help but laugh…

"So you were awake?"

She pushed my chest lightly as if in outrage and finally she proclaimed…

"Unfortunately yes, and by the way you sure know how to wake a girl up."

I smirked devilishly and replied grinding my hardness against her backside…

"I don't like to brag, but yes, I have mastered the art, you would be surprised at how many ways there really are."

She flipped around her arms and legs flinging around me like a damn spider monkey in greeting and she confessed meeting my gaze…

"You are so bad."

I kissed her, our lips dancing and I answered after a few tender lip locks…

"I know, but that's why you love me…"

She smiled as I went for her neck, her chest heaving and eyelashes fluttered as I planted a love bite on my favorite spot…

"Maybe."

She answered smugly and I stopped suddenly, looking at her a moment of doubt passing through my mind and I asked…

"Just maybe?

"You get in plenty of trouble, but that's not why I love you…"

I raised my brows because now she had gotten my attention…

"Oh really, and why is that?"

And she remarked with a smirk…

"Oh no, I'm not falling for that, if you want me to answer that question, you go first…"

I laughed and replied…

"So you want to play that game do you?" I asked and she nodded her head and smiled smugly giving me no other option but to play along, and pretended to think for a moment…

"Hmmm? Well you are determined, ruthless, will stop at nothing to help the ones you love, you are brave, and sweet and kind, and an excellent lover."

I wiggled my brows and she laughed tossing her hand against my chest playfully she rolled me over on my back and asked me as her long golden tresses draped over my chest enticingly…

"And what else?"

I raised my brows in intrigue…This was clearly turning her on, as it was me and she rubbed over my pelvis playfully…

"You value tradition and family…"

She smirked and began to trail her long hair over my chest. _Oh god she felt good._

"You are like my own private spider monkey, my own private very limber little spider monkey."

Then she swatted the side of my ass.

I answered with a kiss in an attempt to end the foreplay as she braced herself against my chest…

She smiled, and I looked into her eyes deeply as if I was looking into her soul, I replied…

"You're not like any other girl I've met before, you're different…"

The expression on her face wavered and I assured her…

"Different in a good way…I wanted you the very first moment I laid eyes on you in that bar…"

She smirked and she shook her head in denial…

"You're such a liar."

I chuckled and shook my head…

"It's true."

Sookie looked at me for a minute as if she was studying my virtue and finally she confessed…

"I think I wanted you too."

My smile broadened and I shook my head in disbelief…

"I knew it."

She put her hand on my chest and threatened me…

"Don't get cocky Eric."

I laughed and replied with a smirk, looking down at my burning hard on as if to prove my point…

"That's kind of hard to do when you have been so encouraging Darling."

Sookie followed my gaze south, swallowing for a moment, and then she pulled herself together smiled and I flipped her over on her back getting her to finally surrender to me, and she admitted breathlessly…

"Yes sometimes it is very hard"

"Yes it is." I agreed with one brow raised.

Before I crashed my lips over hers and sunk said hard burning desire deep inside her.

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

Eric was an amazing lover. When we made love it was like everything else faded into the background and it was just us, the only two people in the universe.

I watched the intensity in his eyes as he took his sweet time taking me to my climax.

I wrapped my legs around him climbing that peak along with him and then he pinned my legs down which allowed him to slide into me further.

I gasped and moaned in ecstatic torture as he moved deeper and deeper, which in turn caused me to see stars as he continued his pillage into my core.

I didn't care if my Gran was right outside, I didn't care that I had to work today, I didn't care what anyone thought of us, right now it was just us and I was smitten with him.

In the back of my mind I heard birds chirping outside, Eric's heavy breathing laced with mine before he leaned in and smothered his mouth over mine once more.

I found it hard to think or to imagine my life could ever be perfect, but this felt pretty darn close to perfection.

He hit that spot deep down inside me that caused my whole body to shake and I knew we were close.

"Eric!" I moaned his name helpless to stop what was about to happen, placing my hand on his face as I felt the walls expand and contract and then he looked at me his eyes burning into my soul and I opened to him completely, blinded by the white light I felt my body stiffen.

"Sookie!" His voice echoed in the back of my brain as my eyes rolled back and then my body fell off that cliff into a pile of mush below his.

He soon followed, his lips falling against mine and we kissed with an intense desperation I didn't know still existed, but it did.

I heard a car door slam outside which snapped me out of my post coital haze and I looked back at Eric in alarm.

As if he knew what I was thinking he propped up on his long muscular arm. I attempted to sit up but only got a mouthful of Eric's nipple which caused another wave of heat to pass over me.

Eric smirked back at me and he replied…

"You know you are allowed to stay in bed, you are a grown woman after all."

I bit my lip knowing he was trying to per sway me to stay in bed, but I couldn't do this with my Gran right downstairs.

Eric leaned over me as far as he could go and he replied…

"Looks like it's your brother."

"Jason?"

"Yes, unless you have another brother." I flipped my eyes up not in the mood for his sarcasm and replied while trying to push off his 225 lb body…

"I have to deal with him sooner or later, my Gran can only hold him off for so long."

"Your Grandmother left about an hour ago." Eric replied.

"You mean she left? You knew she left and you didn't tell me?"

"Yep." He smiled smugly and I swatted his arm. He finally moved to let me pass and asked guilting me out of going anywhere…

"You haven't spoken to your brother since…."

He looked at me in question and I shook my head, feeling bad about that.

I yanked what was left of my sheet over me replying…

"Ill wash up and see what he wants."

Eric looked at me for a moment in tense pause and I assured him…

"Ill be fine."

"That's good, but I'm going down after you for back up."

I smiled and kissed him one last time quickly on the lips for good measure and I replied…

"At least tonight we won't have to worry about any distractions."

I for one couldn't wait and I was looking forward to alleviating some of the tension, which I knew we would both most likely require again tonight. Tonight couldn't come fast enough in my opinion. I quickly skirted about trying to find something suitable to confront my brother in and then went into the bathroom to wash my face.

I had brushed my teeth along side Eric. He said he was going to take a shower so I left him to that doing my best not to peek because I knew he'd just try to suck me back into his vortex with him, which wouldn't be very productive for either of us. I changed into my uniform because what was the point of changing again if I was going to work in a little under two hours, swept my hair back, and then I went down stairs to deal with Jason.

He was sitting at the kitchen table flipping through the comic section of the Sunday newspaper, and I realized I had missed yet another Sunday service. That had to be where my Grandmother went, I thought. Part of me was relieved because I knew it had been just Eric and I in the house up until Jason came and who knew what kinds of noises we made. That would have been so embarrassing if we were caught. But the other part of me felt guilty. I only hoped the good lord would forgive me for ditching church yet again. One thing was for sure: I had a lot of making up to do when I finally did get my life back on track.

"Good morning." I replied when Jason looked up and he answered reluctantly…

"Mornin."

I didn't want to jump at him the moment he saw me so I made myself busy with making coffee for Eric, and finding some food in the fridge.

After pulling out some eggs, chives, and some left over buttermilk biscuits and honey I thought I should make an attempt to break the ice and I asked Jason…

"Can I make you some breakfast?"

Jason looked at the cookie he was holding in his hand as if pondering whether a cookie was good breakfast and he finally answered…

"Sure, if you got enough for two."

He looked at what I had pulled out and I decided now was as good a time as any to bring up the fact that Eric was here and I replied…

"Actually it will be three. Eric will be joining us shortly."

I wasn't about to tell Jason Eric was naked in my bathroom right now washing off after a late morning of love making. No, that probably wouldn't have gone over well. A shiver ran through me and I tried again to not think of Eric naked in my shower right now.

Jason looked back at me his brow creased and he replied under his breath…

"So he finally decided to show up huh, must be nice for you but I've seen his type before, the love them and leave them type…I wouldn't get too comfortable."

I sighed and set down the coffee cup on the counter and looked back at Jason with a hard stare enlightening him in defense of Eric…

"Eric didn't chose to leave me Jason, I want to stay here with Gran part time…She's getting older now, she needs my help around the house, even if she wont admit it."

Jason met my gaze in question, stubbornly refusing to believe my explanation he replied…

"I wouldn't be so sure of that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I saw the way he was around that other girl, the blonde, they seem pretty close, she didn't even blink when I tried to ask her out."

I rolled my eyes and enlightened him…

"Pam is his ex, they have a long complicated history, but they are over."

_And she can see right through your Bullshit act,_ I thought.

"Well it's just odd is all I'm sayin." Jason concluded stubbornly and I just shook my head.

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

I had finished up in the shower and had just dried off when I looked around Sookie's room and realized I should probably bring a few of my personal items over here too. She had done as much at my house.

I took a moment to linger, looking at her photos and various mementos. There was an old one of Sookie, her brother Jason, both standing by a black horse, while a woman with blonde hair sat on top of the magnificent creature. Sookie had her tongue in between her two front teeth smiling for the camera and I couldn't help but smirk. She still had that same attitude today. Headstrong and fearless while standing next to that huge beautiful yet dangerous creature. I sighed knowing that headstrong attitude could get her in trouble, but I would be lying if I said that was not one of the reasons I loved her.

I set down the picture frame, about to go downstairs and rescue my lover from her pain, despite her insistence to handle the matter herself, when I saw a familiar white envelope poking out of her purse. I felt a strange uneasiness when I spotted it, but nevertheless...

I walked over to her desk and picked up the envelope. Sookie's name was written on it in neat handwriting, letters all capital and I turned the piece of paper over in my hand, debating on whether or not I really wanted to read Bills letter. I felt a momentary return of jealousy wash over me, but as I turned the letter over in my hand I realized she hadn't even opened it yet, and the jealousy passed. It's not like Bill fucking Compton ever had a chance of winning her back.

I laid down on her now made bed in disbelief that I was behaving like some pubescent little girl. And rationed that what she didn't know wouldn't hurt her. No way was I going to tell her about my almost felony last night. What surprised me is that I was angry enough to break his neck in two with my bare hands. I didn't know where that rage came from, but the scary part was, I wasn't sure if I still would have necessarily regretted killing him. Although at this point, I didn't think my life was worth the price of his. I had far too much to live for, unlike before.

"Sookie Stackhouse you will be the death of me." I muttered closing my eyes for a moment as I inhaled her scent once more, which had lingered in the bed and in the air around me.

_So what were we going to do about her brother? _I wondered to myself, my thoughts now turning to her family and trying to make things right. In all honesty I didn't really care what the junior redneck thought of us, but Sookie did, so that made him matter to me.

Then an idea popped into my head and I smiled wickedly thinking this could get me two birds with one stone.

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

"Well you don't look any different…Ain't ya supposed to get fat right away, ya know, like have swollen feet and bigger boobs and stuff?"

I rolled my eyes because Jason had the manners of a horse fly and I replied trying to keep a lid on it…

"That comes later, and all women are different."

"So you gonna name him after anyone, maybe someone in the family?"

I couldn't help but smirk at Jason's ever so less than coy attempt to get this baby named after him and I played around kidding and replied…

"You mean like Gramps?"

His smile turned straight and I actually though I had witnessed a frown when Eric came strolling in, all 6 feet 5 of him, and looking fabulously delicious in his clothes from yesterday.

"I don't even know the sex yet anyway." I replied meeting Eric's startling blue gaze, which in turn made me experience a heat flash.

Jason nodded and then he noticed my pause and looked behind him.

"Oh it's you, decided to make yourself at home did ya?"

"Jason!" I exclaimed in defense of Eric thinking he was acting extra rude, but Eric simply replied taking a biscuit…

"Yes, home is where the heart is after all." He looked at me and I felt those butterflies stir.

Jason simply rolled his eyes and he sat up straighter as if he had just lost his appetite.

"Yeah, apparently. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free right?"

"Jason Thomas Stackhouse, you say you're sorry right now!" I ordered him, swiping away his plate, but Eric simply shook his head and he sat down calmly at the table propping his feet up on a chair.

"It's fine Sookie, he is just being protective of you…I get that, I respect that."

Jason nodded his head as if Eric was the only person who understood him and I just stared on in disbelief.

"I know you come around as often as you can to check up on your sister and your grandmother and I think that is very admirable. I mean let's face it, in this day and age, how many brothers really go the extra mile like that. It's an old fashioned touch that is really commendable."

"Thanks." Jason replied nodding his head in agreement. I had to wonder if Eric had just smoked something upstairs because he was talking crazy. Jason came around once or twice a week if best and 9.9 times out of 10 it was to get free food and beer.

"Your Grandmother is really lucky to have a grandson who is as willing to help her out with things around the house, just like her grand daughter, I mean things like putting on a fresh coat of paint in the foyer or even cleaning out the gutters is a huge help to her."

"Well I haven't exactly…" But Eric continued cutting him off…

"And groceries or pitching in to mow the lawn every so often…I'm sure she appreciates that too…"

"Yeah, I haven't had time to help out with those things, but I guess I could come around once or twice a week to help out."

Eric cast me a smug smile and in that moment I knew exactly what he was doing. Eric nodded his head and he patted Jason on the arm…

"I look up to you Jason, I only hope some day I can be a real man and learn a thing or two from you."

Jason smiled in a goofy way and I suddenly realized how gullible my brother really was. And then to seal the deal Eric proclaimed…

"And of course, you're going to be family now, I mean you're going to be an uncle, you have to let me dedicate a party in honor of my new family at my bar…Freyja"

Jason looked back at him sheepishly but when Eric mentioned the name of his bar Jason's face fell in shock…

"That place down in Shreveport? The one with all the dancing girls and crazy light show?"

I shot Eric a look in question. He didn't mention anything about dancing girls.

Eric nodded looking strangely smug and proud of himself. All I could do was roll my eyes and think…

'_Men!'_

Then Eric replied modestly…

"Yeah, that's the place."

"Well count me in, when is this thing?" Jason asked trying to control his excitement, the light now visible in his eyes but he was failing miserably.

I could see that I had underestimated Eric and his powers of persuasion. He had Jason right back to wrapped around his little finger which was a hard thing to do.

"Well if you give me a little time I can put in a good word for you with some of the dancers."

Eric winked at him and I muttered under my breath…

"_Oh for the love of God."_

Eric flashed me a cunning smirk and then he went in for the kill…

"How about 3 weeks from today, then we can announce it officially that Sookie is pregnant too. It can be a private party, we will have a 5 star 7 course meal first prepared by my top chef to which Sookie's Grandmother and any other friends you would like to invite can attend, and then we can get to that other part."

This time Jason winked at Eric and I could only shake my head. He was unbelievable. _Thanks for checking with me_, I thought flashing Eric a glare from across the room. Not to mention I wasn't sure I was ready for the whole world to know yet. I was still getting used to hearing the news myself. Nevertheless, it appeared his plan had worked because Jason was eating it up like candy.

I didn't want to admit that on top of my frustration with Eric's highhandedness, I was kind of nervous. If Jason made good on his word and came around more to help out, did that mean I no longer had an excuse to stay here?

I loved Eric, I enjoyed living with him, but it was all uncharted territory with him. I was a fish out of water. I was afraid if I let go of this place, I would let go of the last memory I had and possibly lose what I remembered about my old self forever. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing, but I liked things the way they were now. I liked looking forward to seeing Eric at the end of the weekend, and he looked forward to seeing me.

_What were we going to do if we were together every day?_ I was worried we might kill each other.

"What do you think Sookie?" Eric finally asked me and I wanted to tell him…

_Oh you mean you actually care what I think?_ I thought angrily.

He had done such a good job schmoozing my brother I had to wonder if he really did care. And finally I replied truthfully trying not to let my emotions get the best of me…

"I guess that's fine. Ill have to make sure I can get that night off work, maybe I can invite Sam and some of the other people from Merlottes too."

Eric nodded and he replied with a smile…

"Yes."

I sighed knowing my life would never be normal but I could at least try for normal and finally I set down Eric's plate in front of him, along with Jason's old plate I had confiscated and replied…

"Well you better eat up before your breakfast gets cold."

"Breakfast and my own private spider monkey? You certainly know how to win a mans heart Darling."

I shot Eric a glare as my face went totally red from embarrassment, knowing what he was referring to, I did not think it was appropriate breakfast conversation, especially with my brother sitting right here, but its not like he gave a damn or was even capable of feeling embarrassment and then Jason asked him confused...

"Spider monkey?'

I rolled my eyes and told Jason...

"Just ignore him, he's only talking about himself."

Jason looked back from me to Eric most likely thinking we both were crazy and I didn't blame him, and then he returned to shoveling eggs into his mouth.

After a late breakfast, Jason left promising he would be back later this afternoon to get started on sanding the foyer walls. Eric was right, it did need a new coat of paint, it was chipping and there were a few cracks in the foundation that needed patching as well. I supposed if Jason didn't do it, I could.

Eric called one of his friends from Shreveport and asked him if he could help him get his car out later today. I felt bad for Eric knowing that car was his baby. We had never really gotten around to discussing what happened last night, but Eric had mentioned he had to take a detour, so I put two and two together and figured the detour ran along the road that went by Bills house.

I had bigger things to worry about now anyway, no thanks to my baby daddies big mouth, like gearing up to tell the whole town I was knocked up and unwed. I knew that would go over real well with the more old fashioned ones. As if they didn't think I was an outcast before, Id really be one now.

But strangely despite our differences of opinion, I felt like things were emotionally right between Eric and me. I didn't want to push this thing too fast. My Gran had told me once to take things slow and enjoy the ride, and that's exactly what I wanted to do. Why try to fix what wasn't broken? Maybe just maybe those other old coots could just go stick something in their ears if they had a problem with my choices.

When Eric came back from making his call, I told him he could use my car to get around for the day. I saw a slight flicker in his eyes, but he made no side bar remarks about the pathetic piece of junk it was, for which I was thankful. If he had I would have kicked him. You don't turn down a helping hand when it's offered, that just isn't polite.

We spent the remainder of the late morning relaxing in the cool living room. Eric had asked about an old photograph of me with a horse. I figured he had seen the picture I had of my mother upstairs when we were out at my cousins ranch in Wyoming. I knew we had more pictures from that weekend, so I decided to get the album out. I couldn't pretend that it still didn't hurt to see the pictures of my parents tending to Jason and me, but Eric seemed to enjoy looking through them.

I settled in next to Eric on the couch and for the second time that morning, noted how natural this felt, like we just fit.

He smirked and asked me playfully as he flipped another page...

"I love the yellow bikini...you look very fetching."

"Pervert."

I replied half kidding, thinking what kind of a guy admired bathing suits modeled on little girls and Eric replied tugging at my ponytail...

"Yes I was just one of those boys who happened to believe girls did not possess, what is the term? Cooties."

I smirked, thinking that sounded just like Eric, I could picture the playground scene now, he was the one looking up the skirts while the teachers weren't watching and I replied...

"I'll bet you were."

I leaned back against his strong shoulder and closed my eyes, so not wanting to go to work right now. I half contemplated calling in sick, but I knew Sam needed my help over the lunch hour. There was a game on today, sighing I reluctantly peeled myself away from him and groaned...

"I have to go to work."

"You don't sound too thrilled about that." Eric replied as he folded up the album and set it down on the coffee table and I sighed explaining tiredly...

"It's just been a long week, we were short staffed and I pulled a double shift the other night."

"You know, you would not have this problem if you came to work for me." Eric replied with a halfhearted smile and I looked back at him stunned questioning why he was bringing this up.

"You mean like waitress for Freyja?"

Eric smirked and he replied...

"Well there's waitressing or there are other jobs, I've been searching for a PR firm to handle some of our upcoming events but it might be more convenient to have my own PR person in house. And you could get any day off you wanted."

He winked.

I suddenly felt uncomfortable, not liking what he was getting at. Was he ashamed of me for being a waitress? I certainly didn't want any hand-outs, and I answered simply trying to be polite...

"Eric I appreciate the offer, but I'm happy at Merlottes, Sam treats me well..."

My words trailed off and I looked back at him in question again wondering where this was coming from. And then Eric's face relaxed and he answered taking my hand...

"You know me, Ill try anything to get you closer to me."

I bit my lip and looked at him for a moment hesitant wondering if he was really dropping this. But as my gaze met his and he smiled back at me genuinely, I realized he was. I couldn't help but smile briefly at him, thankful for the out. He was ever the charmer that Eric, although it was a relief to know he was not plotting against me and trying to conform me, because that was the last thing I needed right now and I replied batting my lashes and putting on a sexy smirk...

"You'll get me tonight cowboy, don't be greedy now."

Eric smirked back at me and he leaned in and pressed his soft lips to mine, igniting a flame between us that burned all my worries away.

xxxxxx

_**EPOV**_

I dropped Sookie off at work around noon and then spoke to my friend Bobby about getting my baby out of that ditch. Luckily this time Bobby was around, unlike the last time, when I was stranded on the highway with a flat. That was an adventure and a half.

I was nervous to see the damage in the daylight frankly and when he said he'd meet me I rushed over in that hunk of metal Sookie called a car to survey for myself. I thought I might need a moment to take it all in if things were worse than I had suspected.

I got there about 15 minutes before Bobby and saw that I had only lost one tail light from what I could see on the exposed sides and there was a long scratch mark on the hood.

_Fucking wolves_!

I thought angrily wondering what the hell they were doing out here. I never remembered hearing about or seeing any before in this part of Louisiana.

Must be from all that urban sprawl, I thought bitterly looking at my poor baby. Either that or it escaped from the zoo. I read somewhere those things can cover a hundred miles in only a few days.

When Bobby got there we hooked up my car to his tow truck. Unfortunately once the car was lifted, I realized the side panel was all dented, and I knew this was going to cost me.

My knees jammed against the dashboard in Sookie's little Gremlin crunching me within. Her seat felt like a wooden board but it got me where I needed to go, and I figured when the time came for us to discuss getting a new mode of transportation for the baby the choice would be easy as to who's vehicle goes.

Thankfully Bobby told me they could have my 'Red' ready by Monday afternoon if he could get the side panel replacement from the dealership.

After dealing with my car, I stopped home first to change and then onto Freyja. Sundays were always busier around brunch and dinner, but people didn't stay too late, so I didn't feel that bad about leaving early. I had gotten a lot of work done this week. Always amazed at what could be accomplished when I concentrated at my task at hand, I thought.

Chow gave me shit about driving in that yellow piece of scrap metal and I told him to "Fuck off" before I left. He just smiled and waved goodbye.

By the time the evening rolled around I was so ready to grab Sookie, lock her up in my house and have my way with her. I even got to Merlottes a few minutes early. She spotted me when I came in. She was holding a few menus in her hands and explained with her sweet smile…

"I'll be ready to go in a few minutes, I'm just waiting for Dawn to get here, she's always 5 minutes late."

She kissed the spot below the corner of my mouth and I smiled sheepishly as she ran off to seat the customers. Fine I supposed I could wait a few more minutes for my little slice of heaven I thought.

I looked around and saw a newspaper rack in the doorway. I grabbed a copy of the latest _Onion_ and leaned against the wood wall divider and crossed my legs as I scanned the paper for horoscopes. _The Onion_ did always have funny ones, I thought.

I was midway through scanning for Sookie's horoscope after having read mine when a familiar dark flash cloaked by a deep musty scent, repulsive to my nose came gliding through the door. My muscles stiffened instantly as I looked on shooting daggers into the back of his head.

_Bill Fucking Compton._

He waltzed up to the hostess stand and that red head came over to greet him…

"You're here again today? We can't seem to keep you away from this place can we? But I won't complain because its definitely good for business and my tips."

She winked at him and Bill replied…

"Actually, thank you Arlene, but I was wondering if I could be seated in Sookie's section?"

"Well honey, you can but she's about to get off in about 5 minutes, soon as Dawn get's here. I can seat you in mine and tell her you're here, how does that sound?"

Arlene offered brightly, and my blood suddenly began to boil. _What the hell was he doing here? And twice in one day?_ I was feeling that urge to crush something again. Something head shaped perhaps? My nostrils flared as Bill replied…

"That would be delightful, thank you Arlene, and don't worry, I always tip my waitresses a little extra."

He winked at her and she smiled brilliantly.

I don't know why, but at that moment, I knew something had to be done about him. I didn't regret not finding him last night, but I wasn't relieved either. I had been foolish to go after Bill. I could admit that to myself now. If I really wanted to kill him, it wouldn't have been in some pathetic act of uncontrolled rage. No, it had to be calculating, concise, and above all, in no way whatsoever, traceable back to me. I shook my head knowing how sloppy I almost was, pledging to not let that happen again. My angel saved me, but how could I return the favor and save her from this creep?

I had enough of this guy trying to weasel his way back into Sookie's world. The fucker had wreaked havoc all over my life and practically got me sent away to prison for 30+ years, not to mention he hurt Sookie worse than even my most horrific nightmares could have dreamed up. There was no way in fucking hell he was getting his way right now. Controlled anger or not, he had to be dealt with.

I set down the paper strode up to Bill from behind, clamped my hand down on his shoulder in threat, and spoke…

"Bill Compton what a surprise to see you here!"

I replied with acidic kindness, and he turned around to gaze back at me with a glare...

"Well well well, if it isn't Eric Northman, the man who stole my fiancée out from right under my nose, left me for dead, and then proceeded to get himself locked in jail for murder...You must be proud?"

I rolled my eyes even hating the sound of his voice and corrected him sharply...

"She was never your fiancée..."

"She was my girlfriend, but apparently you just happen to be one of those bastards who don't value commitment and old fashioned true love. I was her first you know, not like you'd give a damn about that either. You just want to pillage whatever female is willing to spread her legs, and in turn end up pissing all over any chance of a decent and steady life she might have. Why are you here anyway, you decide you wanted one more good fuck before you leave her barefoot and knocked up?"

"You've got 3 seconds to get out of here Compton before I made your face look like road kill."

Bill turned around sharply his eyes narrowed and then he shook his head…

"What's wrong Northman, are you afraid she might slip away from you if she talks to me? Are that pathetically insecure?"

He snorted and looked at me in disgust and then turned around and muttered..."Fucking prick!"

Arlene was back now with a weary smile on her face and Bill concluded wiping the anger off his face…

"I apologize for the interruption Arlene, please show me to my seat."

"Arlene, don't show him any where." I interrupted coolly staring Bill down and he glared at me.

Arlene stood there unsure of what to do and then Bill came closer to me, standing in my face in challenge, he replied with a hiss…

"I can't believe they let you out of your cage, but I assure you if you try anything Ill have the police here so fast you won't see the handcuffs coming. Maybe they'd be interested to hear about your little rendezvous last night on Old Parish Road, not really sorry to see the penis mobile go though. Bet she's really disappointed about that car, maybe things are finally starting to look up for us guys who don't need the extra props to get women"

My eyes tore into his. So he had seen me? I knew I had gotten too close, it didn't help that I had to leave my car for the night either.

"Oh please do call them, I have a thing or two to tell them myself…" I spat back wishing against god and all the religions that Sookie would report this son of a bitch to the authorities. Bill leaned in again, his voice like poison to my veins as I was forced to suffer through more of his shit filled words and he hissed…

"You are good, Ill give you that, even fooled an entire court, but we both know the truth that you killed your army buddy and you would have killed me too if you had the chance. She should have left your ass back to rot in that jail cell where you belong."

He sneered and that's when I knew I couldn't contain the rage any more. My fists balled up into knuckle shaped steel and I hit him square in the jaw.

Arlene screamed….

"Ohmigod Sam! Sam get out here!"

Bill shot a punch back at me hitting my nose and I felt the blood drip out.

"Please don't hurt me I just got my nails done!" Arlene shrieked backing away from us.

I got an elbow into his other jaw as we turned over a near by table and that's when I heard Sookie screaming from behind…

"Stop it! Stop!"

I looked back at Sookie and Bill sucker punched me in the gut. There was no way I was going to let him get away with getting his last slimy shot in. I balled up my fists once more, hearing Sookies frantic voice behind me yell…

"ERIC!"

But she couldn't stop me. I had too much hate for this man. I wanted to see him suffer the way he made Sookie suffer and, I used my head to crash my skull against his causing him to see stars as he fell back on his ass.

"Eric!" She proclaimed angrily glaring at me and then her boss in apology, Sam came running up.

"If you two don't get your asses the fuck out of here right now I'm calling the cops, and don't think I wont do it!"

I had called Bills bluff earlier, but there was no doubt in my mind that Sam was dead serious. More dealings with the cops wasn't exactly what I needed right now, in fact it was the last thing. I met Sam's gaze apologetically and then I simply nodded my head wiped my bloody nose, looked back at Sookie and replied…

"Ill be outside."

"Sam I'm sorry!" I heard Sookie speak behind me, but I thought it would be better if I just left and waited for her outside.

I took my familiar perch on the curb and heard footsteps approach. I knew who it was before even turning around.

But she kept walking past me and then announced sharply over her shoulder…

"Give me the keys.'

I rolled my eyes knowing she was pissed, but so was I. Hoping I would at least get the chance to explain myself, not that my actions needed an explanation. Bill was an asshole plain and clear and I wasn't going to apologize for that.

"You really have no idea what you've done in there have you? I saw you throw the first punch Eric!"

Sookie proclaimed and I replied…

"If you knew what he said you would have been rooting me on."

"You're not even sorry are you?" She spat back and I shook my head replying as I got to the passenger side.

"Nope."

She shook her head and muttered under her breath…

"Unbelievable."

I didn't say anything, electing to choose my words carefully, I decided to let her cool off a bit. I knew I could use a cold ice bath right about now, as could my body.

I sighed, slid in to the passenger seat but my knees jammed up against the glove compartment. I winced because this time The dash crashed against my skinned knee. I was having a hell of a couple days. Funny how trouble only seemed to happen for me when I was around Sookie, I thought absently. Deciding to keep my thoughts to myself,

I found the seat bar and slid it back. The glove compartment popped open once my legs slid back with the chair causing the contents to fall out.

A long rectangular piece of paper floated to the ground along with a flash light, tire gage, and insurance card. As Sookie slid in I picked it up the paper and flipped it over. I was about to shove it back into the glove compartment when I recognized the familiar handwriting on the signature line then my face fell…

_What the fuck?_

Sookie was so angry she had slammed her door and started the car, before she realized what I was looking at and then all the blood drained from her face as her gaze dropped to my hands.

I had apparently discovered a check from Bill Compton, made out to Sookie Stackhouse for $20,000 dated last week.

"I don't think unbelievable would do this justice."

I finally replied flatly. Apparently my actions hadn't been so out of line after all, questioning now which one of us wanted to go first


	26. Chapter 26

**AN: **Yeye, I made my deadline. Was hoping to have this done by tonight. I hope its okay. I dont usually do a chapter that is almost pure dialogue so I hope I dont bore you or drag things too far. But as you can see, these two have ALOT to talk about, lol. So hopefully this helps to resolve some things. My only wish is that it leaves you satisfied by the end.

BTW, I couldnt resist making a comment about the fuckery that is Bill and Sookie on True Blood, LOL. WTF was that? Who saw that last scene coming? Is it wrong that seeing Eric with Talbot, makes me want E even more now? Maybe Sookie will have to move over soon, cause she is beating a dead horse with her masochist bf, lol. Anyhow cant wait for next week. I think good things are still in store for ES. ;)

Sorry, dont mean to offend any fans of BS, but Im assuming since you are reading this story that you prefer ES. They are the best of course! :D So now I promise Ill stop rambling. I hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks again to each and every one of you for reading and the reviews! xoxo

**Chapter 26- Before Sunrise**

_SPOV_

"Don't look at me like that, if you think for one second this takes the blame off you for what you did in there, think again!"

Eric actually smiled, which threw me off guard and then he flicked the check back at me and got out of the car cursing to himself in Swedish.

"You can't pin this on me Eric!" I proclaimed getting out of the car and chasing after him on the dirt gravel road outside Merlottes and he just glared at me and kept walking, which only made me angrier and then I exclaimed in an attempt to stop him…

"ERIC NORTHMAN look at me when I'm talking to you!"

He spat back angrily…

"So now you're taking money from him too?"

Well it was progress, at least he wasn't still giving me the silent treatment, but that accusatory tone had to go.

"I'm not taking money from him!" I argued.

"Oh yes, that's exactly why a CHECK from him dropped out of your GLOVE COMPARTMENT!"

"Eric don't be so dense!"

"I should have killed that fucker when I had the chance maybe then Id actually have some fucking peace around here!"

"You make your own trouble Eric! You charged Bill down in the bar, in front of everyone, you pulverized him. I saw you, and you started it. You are so lucky Sam didn't call the police just now!"

I think I actually heard him growl. He clenched his fists, looked back at me with a glare and he stepped over to me his huge body hovering over me, face in mine, and he spat back angrily…

"What wont you do for this man? You are so obviously hell bent on giving him every possible consolation after the fucker RAPED YOU! You won't even press charges, he almost sent me to prison for life, your accepting money from him, and you even console him and take a fucking apology letter from him after the fact. Get a fucking clue Sookie!"

Ooh if looks could kill…he made my blood boil. He had some nerve telling me how to act around Bill when he was the one who was stirring up trouble. My fists clenched and then it clicked for me. _Wait a minute? How did he know about that apology letter?_

My eyes widened in realization and I growled back, "You were spying on me?"

I looked back at him in outrage. Trying to rapidly piece together the puzzle in my head because I couldn't believe he had stooped to that level of distrust in me.

"I wasn't spying, I have better things to do with my time!"

I gasped and felt a heat burn below the surface of my face, and not a good, attracted heat, a who the fuck do you think you are heat, that burned inside me like a churning inferno and I suddenly wondered how was he any better than Bill for what he did?

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO NEEDS TO GET A FUCKING CLUE ERIC!"

I shot him a dark glare and then I spun on my heel and turned back towards the parking lot.

"WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING?" He called after me angrily.

"HOME!" I spat back knowing if I stopped now I would be tempted to slug him and I didn't want to stoop to his level.

"You are just going to leave things like this? So unresolved?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes and was in my car in a matter of seconds, I started it up as he approached, and rolled down the window, finally replying…

"Figure the end out for your self, you seem to be good at jumping to conclusions!"

And with that, I hit my gas, kicked up some dirt and sped off leaving him to eat my dust.

_Serves him right_, I thought trying to keep a lid on the burning anger raging inside me while I was on the road. At the moment I didn't really care if one of those damn wolves actually did attack him.

This was exactly why I didn't think we were ready to move in together. If he wouldn't hear me out or trust me, then how could we survive as a couple?

_EPOV_

I coughed and waved away the dust cloud that Sookie left in her wake and I cursed again in Swedish. I half wondered if it wouldn't serve me better to get this problem with Bill settled now. Don't get your panties in a bunch, I wasn't going to kill him, as appetizing as that fantasy was at the moment, but we had a problem, and you can bet your eye teeth that I wasn't about to let things just go without some understanding.

I realized however, that I needed to deal with Sookie first. So I rubbed the dirt from my face and followed the road to Sookie's house.

By the time I got there the lights were out. It was my fault for the delay; I had taken a wrong turn somewhere and wound up on the other side of the lake. I half contemplated swimming, but wasn't sure if Sookie would see me and I didn't want to walk around with wet clothes if I was going to be stranded here. I was pretty sure Bon Temps did not have a taxi service. I would be lucky if I could get a room at the local motel at this hour on a Sunday night.

I sighed frustrated and looked up at Sookie's window. Nothing like putting all my eggs in one basket, I thought. Sometimes she really acted like a 12 year old. Seriously? Stranding me in the Merlottes parking lot after I found a check from Bill to her? Yeah she wasn't as innocent as she looked. In fact most hypocrites would laugh at the hilarious example she made of both of us. But I had to put all my anger behind me. We needed to sit down and have a serious talk, and I wasn't going to stop until she listened, which meant I definitely had my work cut out for me.

I stood on the ground for a moment looking at the steep climb remembering the last time I did this when Sookie hurt herself. A dark wave passed over me as I remembered that night and the fear I had felt when I thought I could lose Sookie. I was running on adrenaline then, this time I hoped luck would help me out and my weight wouldn't cause the frail wood siding to shatter and cause me greater injury. But at this point, I didn't have much to lose.

I got on the porch, pulled myself up to the railing, climbed on the bottom part of the roof covering the porch, and then I jumped to the trellis.

I cursed to myself when I felt the wooden structure wobble and knew I had to reach Sookie's window before it fell to the ground. I put my foot on the side of the house to brace myself just incase it fell apart from under me and then, I made the jump to Sookie's window.

Of course knowing my luck, the trellis snapped in two after I took the leap and it fell down to the foliage below me, which left me propped against the house with no foothold. I was wedged in a corner and holding onto Sookie's window ledge with most of my weight.

I tried to pull myself up to get a look inside, and that's when her light turned on. I was sure she must have heard the noise I had just made. I closed my eyes hoping that I hadn't woken up her Grandmother as well, and then as if on cue the windows opened above me.

"Sookie?"

I looked up hoping it was her, and it was, her face a mixed contortion of confusion, sleepiness, anger, and fear.

"Eric! What are you doing?" She gasped and I risked inching my hand up inside the window…

"Can you give me a hand?"

I asked, feeling the heaviness of my weight sink down into my shoes like lead. My grip was slipping.

"Oh for crying out loud." She exclaimed, and shook her head in disbelief.

"I'm not kidding, I wish I was." I replied with clenched jaw as my foot skidded down another inch.

"Okay, give me your hand, but try to be quiet, I don't want to wake my Gran."

I nodded, and gave her my hand. I didn't think someone as small as Sookie could lift me, so I tried to position my body in a manner that would take the most weight off her.

"I can't believe you would climb up to my window, you know normal people just call on the phone or ring the doorbell." She hissed, my forearm in her grip and I replied…

"Would you have answered?"

She snorted lightly and glared at me, shaking her head…

"No you stupid stubborn ass hole."

"Well then that's why." I replied and she just glared at me while pulling hard. I could tell she was putting all her might into it. I was a few inches from being able to hold onto the inside of the window where I could pull myself in, but Sookie was now grabbing my waist. I was about to assure her that I was far enough in now to push on my own when she gave me one last hard tug succeeding in getting me where I needed to be only, I missed my chance to grab hold of the frame and then gravity took over.

Sookie shrieked as she fell back, it all happened so fast, I couldn't stop it and before I knew it, I had landed with a thump on top of her. We both groaned automatically looked at the door to make sure we hadn't woken her grandmother and then as I got my bearings back, I glanced at her to measure the gage of her anger, and realized our noses were just mere centimeters apart. My gaze met hers for a moment as she looked back at me obviously stunned into silence, and I felt that familiar stirring in my loins. We were so close I could feel her warm breath on my skin. I wanted to kiss her so badly at the moment, but I knew we had to talk first.

Yet somehow I couldn't pry myself away as her chest heaved against mine, and the room suddenly felt very hot. I knew then I was in serious trouble.

"_Sookie is everything okay?"_

We both heard Adele ask from the other side of Sookie's door, like a bucket of cold ice water dumped over our heads. I winced and pushed myself off her as she frantically pulled herself together, sitting up she replied breathless…

"Yes Gran, I'm fine! Thanks for checking!"

Moments later we both heard the footsteps move away.

I knew the spell had been broken when Sookie glared at me, pushed me away and she hissed…

"What do you want Eric?"

"I need to talk to you."

She huffed and shook her head and she replied trying to keep her voice down…

"I think we've talked enough haven't we? I mean what more can say before we start kicking and punching?"

"Sookie, I really need to talk to you." I met her gaze earnestly, resting my elbow on her bed and Sookie shook her head and stood up…

"No…I'm done talking for tonight, if you want to talk we can do it in the morning, but right now I just want to go to bed and be done with this ridiculous day! I can't handle any more disappointment right now!"

I couldn't pretend her words didn't sting, and possibly in a way I had deserved them because I hadn't exactly acted rationally tonight either, but I needed the chance to explain. I wanted to get everything out on the table, no more games.

"Sookie, I came here to talk to you about something important, and I need you to hear me out, and if you are willing, I would like to take you back to my house tonight."

She scoffed and shook her head. I knew this wasn't good and then she walked over to me as I stood up to face her, her watery eyes burning holes into my irises, and she replied sadly…

"I waited all day for tonight, I had been looking forward to spending time with you all week, and then you had to go piss all over it and ruin it. I'm sorry if you can't see it that way, but I do and I'm tired. You can use my car, Ill get you the keys, I'm exhausted and I don't want to fight any more."

"Sookie..." I protested, but before I could say anything she took my hand and pulled me out of her room.

"Just go home Eric!" She hissed.

I shook my head in protest, but she had made up her mind.

Unfortunately I didn't have much of a choice at the moment, I didn't want to make a scene and risk bringing Adele out again. I was contemplating once Sookie handed me her car keys, just heaving her body over my shoulders and making a run for it, whether she continued to protest or not. But I knew her; she couldn't be forced into anything.

I curse myself again; yes I was doing a lot of cursing tonight, because she could be so fucking frustrating sometimes. As we reached the base of the stairs and she dug around in her purse for her car keys and I met her gaze...

"Whether you want to hear me out or not, we have to talk Sookie, Pam's right about..."

But before I could continue my plea, another voice spoke out from the dark.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you two. Eric I didn't hear you come in, would you both care for some tea?"

Adele offered brightly. I noticed Sookie's body had stiffened as we both realized we weren't alone. I certainly wasn't prepared for that wondering how much her grandmother had just heard.

I looked back at Sookie who was shooting daggers at me, but realized I had just been given a window of opportunity here, figuring it was one way to avoid being thrown out. I thanked Adele silently for the invitation, playing along for my own bemusement, and I nodded in acceptance and replied with a polite smile...

"Yes Adele, that would be lovely, thank you."

I dared to sneak a glance back at Sookie to once again gage her anger level, and realized that... Yes, she still definitely wanted to kill me.

Adele smiled sweetly and then took my arm. Sookie had no other choice to follow us.

"So what brings you here at this hour?" Adele asked me handing me a plate of freshly made blueberry scones. They looked like little bites of heaven. I watched Sookie who was biting her lip and I knew I had to tread carefully, for my own personal safety and I replied honestly...

"I was just passing through, I thought I would ask Sookie if she wanted to have a late dinner with me."

"At this hour? You must have been working late!" Adele remarked. I didn't say anything other than…

"I was delayed."

"Yes, and it's such a shame that I already ate." Sookie replied, with mock empathy and she took a bite of one of the scones to ruffle my feathers.

"Well looks like you're still hungry there Sugar plum." Adele countered.

Sookie stopped mid chew and set down the scone and then swallowed what was left trying to get rid of her evidence. I tried to contain my smirk as Sookie explained...

"I can never refuse one of your scones Gran, you know that."

Adele smiled and she replied...

"That's true, but I don't remember seeing you eat anything before you headed upstairs to your room, you know when you've got a bun in the oven you're eating for two."

Sookie looked conflicted and torn. She met my glance for a moment as if she had forgotten the little fact that she was pregnant and then she finally lowered her guard and nodded her head…

"Yes, I suppose you're right."

I wanted to comfort her because I knew how her mind worked, at this very moment her right brain was arguing with her left brain about what her next move should be. I wasn't sure my support would be welcomed right now however, so I changed the subject and asked Adele while she poured the tea…

"So did Jason happen to stop by this afternoon?"

She paused for a moment as if in thought putting her finger on the kettle and then she looked at me and she remarked as if in amazement…

"As a matter of fact he did, and he went straight to work sanding the foyer walls, said he would be back tomorrow to paint."

My lips twitched in satisfaction. She looked back at me in question and I nodded my head proclaiming…

"He had mentioned that he might be dropping by earlier today…If he doesn't get to painting, I would be happy to help."

Adele smirked back at me, and for a moment I wondered if she had suspected anything, but she kept her poker face on and nodded her head…

"You are a sweet boy, I'm sure if your mother was still alive she would be very proud."

My smile faltered because one look at Sookie and I wasn't so sure about that. I wasn't so sure about a lot of things lately, which is why I wanted to talk to her. I took a sip of my tea and glanced back at Sookie once more. She appeared as if she was deep in thought.

"Well after you finish your tea, you best get going, I heard there is going to be a dense fog alert tonight, unless of course you want to stay here?"

Adele asked me brightly.

I forced a smile back at her having a feeling I wouldn't be as welcome as she thought. I was about to give up and replied, with one final glance back at Sookie…

"I appreciate the invitation, but I should get back home."

Adele's smile shrunk just a little but then she nodded her head in acceptance. Just when I thought I would have to surrender my quest for the night and try again later, Sookie finally spoke…

"I think Ill go with him."

Both Adele and I looked at Sookie in question, no scratch that, my reaction was more like shock, and Sookie explained…

"Just to make sure he doesn't get stuck in that fog with my car…if that's okay with you?" She turned to her grandmother and asked to my dismay.

"Of course child, you know I'm just right as rain here, I don't need a babysitter as old as I am. Besides y'all haven't seen each other all week I'm sure you have catchin up to do."

Sookie's cool gaze flashed with mine for a moment before she looked back to her grandmother. For a brief moment, I wondered if Sookie did just want to protect her car, maybe she wanted to appease me like she appeased Bill? It was hard to say.

"Ill go pack some of my things." Sookie finally replied and Adele smiled and nodded as she left…

"Go on then, Ill have some scones for you two to go."

I smiled politely at Adele and then I told her about the party I was planning on throwing at my bar. That seemed to make her very happy. As we heard Sookie at the top of the stairs, awaiting her, Adele leaned into me and replied…

"Just give it a little time, everything will fall into place soon."

I met Adele's gaze in question unsure if she was talking about Sookie or my life or maybe both, but either way, I hoped she was right and I thanked her.

Then as if on cue Sookie came down the stairs clunking a huge suitcase on the wood as she tried to carry it down.

"Ill help you." I replied rushing to assist her. Surprised she had decided to pack such a large suitcase this time and not just an over night bag.

I wondered if just maybe the tide was finally turning.

xxxxxx

_SPOV_

I wasn't sure how much I should bring to Eric's place, but having him tell my Gran he would still be willing to help with housework, and hearing the defeat in his voice when he announced he would leave for the night made me want to reach out to him and stop him.

I knew we had a lot of work cut out for us, but I had to at least try. I still couldn't pretend that his earlier remarks didn't hurt. Maybe I had been too lenient with Bill, but he didn't even let me explain. It made me furious. He was acting just like Bill. Controlling, aggressive, it scared me because I really wanted this to work for us.

My Gran was right, the fog was starting to come in about the time we left. I told Eric to keep his brights off so the light wouldn't reflect back into his eyes and he navigated the side roads carefully. Despite our lovers quarrel, I did feel safe with him, glad he was driving right now instead of me.

"Do you want to listen to the radio?" Eric asked me calmly, but truthfully I didn't really care and replied…

"It doesn't matter"

I looked out the window and there was a moment of silence as I thought about leaving my Grandmothers house, and how I would cope if I were to leave it for good. The thought made me sad. Eric flipped the radio on and after a moment of silence he spoke again…

"Would you like to grab a bite somewhere or just get take out?" He asked.

"Whatever you want." I answered looking out the window again, feeling as if I were miles away from here.

"Sookie?" Eric replied and I knew he was going to ask me what was wrong, but luckily my phone rang saving me from his interrogation.

I wasn't ready to talk to him yet. I wished so badly that I could have a drink right now, but I knew that was out of the question. I saw on the caller ID that it was Pam. Normally I would avoid her calls like the plague but for once I thought she actually might be able to help buy me some time.

"Sorry." I explained looking down at my caller ID, and then I answered my cell tiredly…

"Hey Pam."

"_Try to control your excitement darling, did I catch you at work?"_ Pam asked. I looked over at my boyfriend beside me, and I could tell that he was curious but also was attempting to give me my space by pretending to concentrate on the road and I replied casually…

"No I'm with Eric."

"_You certainly don't sound like you are with Eric, what's going on with you two? Are you still giving him crap about not moving in, because honey it's only going to get harder for you once that bump gets bigger."_

"I don't really want to talk about it right now Pam, is there something I can help you with?" I asked hoping to change the subject. It was awkward enough with Eric sitting right here but Pam was too keen, and she replied sharply…

"_Well I'm afraid you don't have much choice Darling unless you want me to third wheel you two, tie you up together, and spout out psychobabble shrink bullshit all night long. And don't think I won't do it."_

"Pam, its fine, things are great between us, I even packed my suitcase, you don't need to tie up anyone."

Eric couldn't help but look back at me with one brow rose in question obviously wondering what on earth we were talking about and I smirked at him knowing if anyone else understood Pam's abrasiveness it was Eric.

Pam laughed and she replied…_"Either you think they took the word naïve out of the dictionary or you think I was born yesterday."_

"No that's not true." I answered.

"_Out with it, put me on speaker phone, I want to talk to your boyfriend too."_

I sighed and looked back at Eric who muttered in concern…

"What does she want?"

Apparently my phone had excellent reception and Pam heard Eric replying…

"_I want to know what's wrong._ (I clicked the speakerphone because I knew arguing was useless and Pam continued her rant) _I can feel the tension between you two all the way from my house, so what gives? Did your brother banish you because he just found out that being preggers means you are no longer a virgin?"_

I rolled my eyes and spat back…"No."

"_Eric, talk to me, why does she sound so gloomy?"_

Eric sighed. He took one look at me, shaking his head I knew he didn't want to do this, reluctant to speak he finally confessed…

"Because I got in a fight with her ex tonight, in front of the whole town, while she was still at work."

I thought I heard Pam smile on the other end as she replied smugly…

"_My my, you have been busy haven't you?"_

I rolled my eyes and Eric replied…

"I can't stand him, every time I look at that asshole I see the devil."

I looked back at Eric strangely wondering where this sudden hate for Bill came from. I mean I knew he always disliked him but I thought Eric had put everything that had happened behind him, like I was trying to do. It disheartened me to think that it would always be like this for us, that Eric couldn't drop a grudge. What kind of an example would his attitude set for our baby? I didn't want to dismiss Eric's behavior and pretend like it was okay to act this way, because it wasn't.

There was a moment of silence and finally I replied thinking, hoping maybe Pam could help because I didn't want to see Eric like this any more than he did…

"Eric followed me after work last night…"

"I didn't follow you."

"Well, you saw me with Bill and I can only gather from your earlier statement that you wouldn't mind seeing him dead, and that scares me."

Eric looked back at me hard and he shook his head…

"I'm not that stupid."

"Oh really, what were you doing out on Old Parish Road last night then? It wasn't a detour was it?"

Eric glared back at me like I had just sold his hide to the lowest bidder.

"I don't have to tell you what I was doing, in fact it's not really any of your business." He snapped.

Okay now that did it, he was starting to piss me off again, and I decided to let him have it, clenching my fists in my lap I spat back...

"Um yeah, I think it is my goddamn business, if you are off on some revenge kick and you get arrested again. What will I do then? I'm not about to give up my savings to bail you out, not with a baby on the way, not with OUR BABY ON THE WAY! Everything you do is my business now BUSTER!"

"BUSTER? You're calling me BUSTER NOW?"

"_Guys, reel it in." Pam advised from the speaker._

"She had a check from him in her glove compartment, it was for $20,000. What am I supposed to say to that?"

I looked back at Eric with disappointment, but the glint in his eyes mirrored mine and I could see that same distress reflecting back at me.

"How am I supposed to react when the man I love doesn't trust me? He was spying on Bill and me for Pete's sake! What do we have if we don't have trust?"

I creased my brows feeling sad and depressed all of the sudden. There was a moment of silence and then Pam finally replied…

"_Eric are you driving?"_

"Yes."

"_Pull over."_

"What?"

_"Pull over you idiot!"_

Eric did as Pam asked begrudgingly, pulling the car over to the side of the highway; luckily no one was behind us.

"_You both have gotten yourself into quite the pickle."_ Pam replied. I sighed thinking we were hopeless. And then she asked me…

"_Sookie, can you tell Eric how what he did makes you feel?"_

I paused for a moment looked back at Eric thinking this felt weird but again, we needed help, so desperately, thinking Pam could be our last resort I nodded…

"I feel like he doesn't trust me, I know he's said he does before, but what am I supposed to think when he's sneaking around behind my back, beating people up, and jumping down my throat about a stupid check?"

"I do trust you, I just don't understand how…"

"_Eric, this is not your turn to respond. Tell Sookie how finding that check makes you feel, tell her why you reacted the way you did..."_

Eric swallowed, closed his eyes for a moment and then looked back at me, shaking his head, there was another long pause and Pam encouraged him…

"_Eric, I'm trying to help. You need to think about that baby now, not just your stubborn wounded pride."_

He looked tortured and for a moment I felt bad for him. He glanced down at his hands in his lap and then he finally replied as if in surrender…

"It hurt me…it hurt me that she can so easily forgive him, after what he put us through, what he put her through, what he put me through, I almost lost my life, I spent too damn long defending myself, by the end I almost believed I was guilty because of him, and I don't want any part of his redemption, I don't care how sorry he is."

There was another pause and I looked at Eric, for a moment thinking as wise and more experienced as he was, he was still like a lost little boy inside. He tugged at my heartstrings and I reached over to take his hand, as he looked at me in question…

"_Right now I want you to forget about Bill, both of you. He has nothing to do with how you both feel about each other does he?"_

There was another long pause and then Pam proclaimed…

"_He better not or Ill go bust his knee caps for you."_

"No he doesn't." I replied looking back at Eric, Pam asked him…

"_Eric?"_

Eric looked at me begrudgingly and finally answered to my relief.

"No."

"_Eric, I want you to pick up the phone and take it off speaker for a second."_

I glanced back at Eric in question and he met my gaze hesitantly…

"_Go ahead, it won't bite. I do but I'm not there so you are in the clear."_

Eric rolled his eyes and then he took the phone.

I couldn't help but wonder what they were talking about as Eric nodded his head and answered sadly in one words increments like "yes" "I know" "fine". He looked out the window and put his hand on his forehead and I knew whatever she was telling him he was struggling with.

It both scared and worried me because Eric was a man who was always in control. But lately he hadn't quite been himself and I couldn't help but wonder if that was because of this baby news. I didn't want him to stay with me if he was having second thoughts. I felt a stab of pain in my chest as my heart raked over with worry. It, it was just so hard. Finally he set the phone back down his shoulders sunken in and pressed the speaker key again. Eric looked back at me, took a deep breath attempting to pull himself together from whatever Pam had told him and he explained…

"Sookie, I want you to stay with me, but only if you are willing and in your own time."

I looked back at Eric in question more confused now than ever because I wondered if Pam had force-fed him these words or did he really mean them? I hated feeling like this, and I creased my brows in confusion and I nodded my head finally accepting his words, although I wasn't quite sure what to do with them.

"_Go ahead Sookie, tell Eric what you want from him too."_ Pam's voice echoed through the speaker and I looked back at him and replied with a swallow…

"You once told me that I needed to stop jumping to conclusions about Eric…Well I want him to stop jumping to conclusions with me, I need him to respect my boundaries, give me my space, I know he wants to try to do what is best."

"_Speak to him Sookie, Look at him..."_ Pam encouraged.

I creased my brows and met his blue gaze with bravery…

"I have told you time and time again that I can take care of myself, and I'm not going anywhere, I love you. But you can't control me and I don't want you to."

And, I didn't want him to stay with me if he didn't want to, but I couldn't get the words out, and then Pam spoke.

_"Eric I think she has a point."_

"I thought you weren't supposed to take sides?" Eric replied stiffening up again.

_"I'm not, but she's committed herself to you, now you need to let go of that anger and give yourself to her. It can only work if you both do it together."_

_"I know you wont do it here in front of me, but sometime very soon I think you should tell Sookie how you really feel, deep down inside, she loves you. Right Sookie?"_

"Yes." I looked back at Eric still wondering what he really thought about all of this because he was a master at the poker face and finally he nodded his head...

"Fine, are you finished?"

Eric was looking at the phone waiting for Pam to speak and she confessed...

_"You know, you two could put your therapist in therapy."_

"You're not our therapist Pam." Eric replied plainly looking back at me once more.

_"See what I mean?"_ Pam retorted.

She paused for a moment and she explained...

_"I was bluffing earlier when I said I could be your third wheel, I actually have company tonight and he is making me dessert. I just wanted to call Sookie to check on the plans for the party. I would be willing to cut my date short for you two lunatics. But if you think you can handle each other without blood shed or fleeing the country, Ill let you off the hook."_

"Oh how magnanimous of you!" Eric retorted with sarcasm and added…

"I'm sure your colleagues would be thrilled to know you call your clients lunatics."

_"I only call it like I see it, you'll thank me some day sweetie."_

"Thank you Pam." I finally replied and Eric looked at me, and Pam replied...

_"You're welcome Darling, but before I go I want both of you to promise me that you will talk before you react when it comes to anything that may affect the other, you are acting for 3 now, not just one."_

I looked back at Eric studying his reaction carefully. His gaze flashed with mine and then he finally nodded...

"Yeah don't worry." Eric said.

"We'll work on it Pam." I replied after him, hoping he really meant it, and Pam answered after a gasp...

_"I'm not quite sure what to say, I think I could cry."_

"Don't ruin your makeup Pam, I'll call you tomorrow." Eric answered.

_"Yes, I have to look hot for my date after all."_

"Who's the lucky guy?" Eric asked.

But Pam only chuckled and then concluded…

_"Goodnight you two, don't let the bed bugs bite, I'll see you tomorrow Eric."_

"Yeah." Eric answered casually.

"Goodnight Pam." I replied, and then she hung up on her end and looked back at Eric and I asked him curiously wondering what Pam meant…

"What's tomorrow?"

He looked at me through the sides of his eyes and then back down at his lap as if he was trying to hide something from me. I began to grow worried, until Eric replied…

"Godric is going to be buried tomorrow morning, the police department finally released his body from the morgue."

Well that explained part of why Eric had behaved the way he had, I thought. He was still grieving for his best friend. It both saddened and frustrated me. He met my gaze with a small flinch and I could see the pain in his eyes for a brief moment which of course made my heard melt. He looked out at the road ahead and then he asked me as he started up the car…

"Would you go with me?"

I felt his pain roll off him in waves. I knew he was trying to be strong so I wasn't about to cave here. I wish he had told me about this sooner. We definitely had to work on this communication thing I thought, instead of jumping down my throat about the check, but then I figured we didn't have much time earlier, and I realized Pam made a good point, it was time to let things go and I replied…

"Of course I will."

He nodded his head in acceptance. Since we were on the subject of tomorrow, I explained...

"I…I have my first appointment with Pam's OBGYN friend tomorrow afternoon…Do you have time to go with me?"

I asked him testing the waters as my eyes rose to meet his, still wondering if he was genuinely into all this baby stuff.

"I want to be at every appointment with you."

I smiled at him faintly, feeling relief by his words. Okay so maybe he wasn't having second thoughts.

"Good." I replied softly and he offered me a small smile.

I took one look at Eric who glanced back at me and he then turned back onto the highway. He was very good at keeping his feelings at bay but I knew he had to be hurting over this whole Godric thing and then he suggested.

"How about we eat in?"

I had to admit, after getting that out, it felt weird. I wasn't really prepared to tell Eric all that I had. I mean we had talked before but not really like that. I hoped he didn't take what I said offensively, but at the same time, maybe it was good that I did tell him. Strangely, it didn't go as badly as I thought it would. Despite my boyfriend's clear melancholy over his best friend, which was understandable, we didn't rip each other to shreds. Maybe it was because Pam was there. I had to think about that the next time we pissed each other off, which would probably be in 5 minutes.

Nevertheless, it was nice to hear what Eric was feeling for once. It would be nicer if he would share those thoughts with me more often but I supposed with Eric, it was just best to appreciate what he did say, he generally had our best interest at heart and I knew it was late, not to mention, I wasn't really in the mood to go out anymore, and I was sure Eric wasn't either so I nodded my head and answered…

"Yeah, sure."

xxxxx

_**EPOV**_

About 20 minutes later we had pulled up outside my town home. I had to admit the conversation with Pam and Sookie in the car just now had been draining on me. I wasn't used to talking about my feelings. For the most part, I didn't really think I had many, but apparently I did.

When Pam asked to speak to me privately I was dreading her words, ready to tell her to back the fuck off and mind her own business, she had no right meddling in ours, but what she said, broke me down…

_"Let go of him Eric, you can't blame Bill, you can't blame anyone else, he is gone now, and he wants you to find your peace."_

My knuckles gripped the steering wheel as Pam's words echoed through my head. I was torn between holding in the pain and allowing the tears to take over, which I didn't really want to do while driving, or in front of Sookie. I was relieved when she turned the on the radio and some loud obnoxious song helped me to put my thoughts on the shelf for the moment.

When we got inside, I set down Sookie's suitcase and she asked me what she could do to help with dinner.

I was thankful that she was such a thoughtful, kind, compassionate, and practical person.

So many of the other girls I had been with, pretty much all nameless at this point, only cared about themselves. Maybe that's why I was with them, because I didn't want the commitment. But Sookie was special. She had this energy and this light that projected out from within. I knew with her, I would be hopelessly drawn in, like a moth to a flame. I had so much I wanted to tell her, but wasn't sure how to begin and I feared if I started I might not be able to stop.

So instead, I nodded my head and went to the fridge.

xxxxx

"My brother seems to think you and Pam have unfinished business romantically."

Sookie replied with a smirk while chopping the mangoes and cabbage.

I looked over at her with intrigue and asked her…

"And why would he think something like that?"

My brow was raised as I looked back at her and she smiled and replied…

"Well he can't quite understand why Pam isn't interested in him."

I chuckled, knowing exactly why Pam wasn't interested in him, but I decided to keep my thoughts to myself because they would serve no purpose here.

"I'm sure it's only because she prefers tall handsome blondes from Sweden." I joked and Sookie bumped into me with her hip in jest.

"Do you agree with him?" I finally asked curiously and she looked at me thoughtfully as I flipped over the fish.

"Well, you are very close to her."

She remarked in thought biting her lip, and I wondered if it was possible she could still be jealous. I hoped she wasn't, she had no reason and then finally she shook her head and concluded…

"No, I know you two have been through a lot together, I actually think its sweet that you have been able to maintain a friendship and that you can support each other the way you do."

I glanced back at her as she tucked a loose strand of blonde hair behind her ear. She seemed to be toying with something, I felt a "but" coming and I helped her along…

"But?"

She bit her lip and looked back at me and she replied…

"Well that's the hard part for me, I guess, I can't understand why you have this healthy friendship with Pam, but you won't let me make peace with Bill."

My brows furrowed and I looked down at the fish instantly feeling the urge to stab it. Feeling that it was no coincidence that she used almost the same words Pam had and I muttered…

"That's different."

"How is it different…I just want to move on."

"He hurt you." I felt my hands begin to shake and I wanted so desperately to let go like Pam had suggested but it was virtually impossible to forget my hate for him. I didn't know how Sookie did it.

"He did hurt me, but when I talked to him the other day, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Forgiving him gave me peace."

I looked back at her struggling to see things from her point of view. I could only hear Sookie's screams, I could only see his spineless face as he came the next day to ask for her forgiveness, I could only see Godric lying there in a pool of his own blood on the floor.

"Eric, that check you found. Bill gave it to me via Tara the day he discovered by mistake that I was pregnant. You see I was in the drug store shopping for a pregnancy test when I bumped into Bill. I told him they were for Tara, but he didn't believe me. I guess Tara ran into him shortly after at the grocery store and when he confronted her, she had no idea what he was talking about, which confirmed his suspicions. He caught her when she was leaving and gave her a bag filled with gifts, and apparently a $20,000 check to me."

There were tears in her eyes and she took a deep breath as if she was struggling to go on…

"You had been released on bail, but I didn't know, I didn't know if I would be forced to raise this baby alone, I didn't know how I could survive financially, I didn't know if you would be locked up for good or not, so when I saw the check…I…I put it aside, just incase."

She blinked and one tear came rolling down her cheek.

I looked down at my hands holding the knife, knowing I still hated the fucker, but I couldn't bear to see Sookie in pain.

I set down the knife carefully and reached over to pull her to me.

She wrapped her arms around my body and it felt so amazingly good. Sookie had no idea what she did to me. It was as if one small embrace could bring me home.

"It's okay."

I finally replied after a few moments pause, not sure I could believe the words that had just come out of my mouth, but I knew I meant them.

She looked up at me with those doe eyes and I knew I could never hurt her the way he did.

"I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions about that check."

She nodded her head and replied…

"I'm sorry for not explaining the Bill thing to you."

I looked down at the food below us, and after a moment of holding her, I took her hand and replied…

"Come on, I have something I want to show you, the food will keep."

She glanced down at our colorful dinner not yet assembled and nodded in agreement.

I took her hand and led her back upstairs. I could tell Sookie was anxious and a little nervous, as was I.

I realized stopping outside my old office for the first time that we hadn't really discussed any of this, I just did it because I wanted to surprise her. I didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, but I hoped it was good. But more than that, I hoped what I was about to show Sookie wouldn't make her freak out.

"In here."

I replied stepping ahead of her, opening the office door and flicking on the switch revealing an empty room, with the exception of a dark brown sleigh shaped crib with a plush pillow topped mattress and white fluffy bedding standing in the corner.

Sookie let out a breath I didn't know she was holding. I studied her reaction to this and I explained…

"I thought the baby could have a place to stay as well, when you're here. (I added to be safe) We could even decorate the room together."

She was silent, too silent and I began to grow worried offering…

"If you don't like it, I can take it back."

And then the tears returned, and she actually sniffled and looked back at me. Here it comes, I thought. She would accuse me of pushing too hard and trying to control her life. I tensed up prepared for the verbal blow, when she shook her head and exclaimed…

"I love it. (She walked over to the crib and ran her hand along the dark wood frame and she remarked with admiration…) It's beautiful."

I smiled in relief approaching the crib cautiously just incase she had second thoughts and then she hugged me tight, washing all the tension away. It felt so right, having her here in my arms. I wanted to tell her she had nothing to fear, that I was in this for the long haul, and that I would take care of her and our baby. I inhaled her sweet intoxicating scent and pulled her closer to me.

"I…I wasn't sure you wanted this…I know you wanted me, but the whole baby part…" Her voice trailed off and she shook her head…

"You thought I didn't want the baby?" I creased my brows and looked into her eyes in question.

"I didn't mean it like that, I just knew it came as a shock to you too, and I don't, just forget I said anything…"

But I couldn't forget, her words only made me want to convince her more.

"Sookie, I want you, I want this baby, I'm sorry if I ever gave you any doubt…"

"You didn't…"

I put my hand on her cheek wanting to proclaim the truth but I could tell she wasn't done, so I waited patiently for her, my eyes never leaving her angelic face and finally she looked at me and explained…

"It was me. (She paused for a moment, let out a little sigh and then met my gaze with pain filled eyes.) Incase you couldn't tell, Bill did a number on me…After him I wasn't sure I could ever love anyone again, let alone trust them…And then you came along and you felt too good to be true, but you weren't and I was afraid I could lose you…I think I was worried if I thought we could be happy together and if I just kept my distance I could spare myself more pain."

I met her gaze with questioning blue eyes and she concluded…

"You make me look outside myself and sometimes that's not so easy to do…(she stared down at the floor and muttered…) Anyway… I'm happy I was wrong."

Her bravery is what I found most attractive about her, I realized in that moment. She blinked and looked up at me offering me a small smile and I assured her…

"I don't want you to ever doubt me again…We're family now, you are my family, the only family I have so you can rest assured I will not fuck it up...(I rethought that last line knowing I was destined to fuck it up at some point and I added with a smirk…) At least not too badly."

Sookie smiled back and before I knew it our lips had joined and I was breathing her in as if my life depended on it. I clenched the back of her tank top and she ran her hands through my hair, igniting that everlasting flame that burned between us.

This felt so good, it felt so right. I couldn't believe I had been so angry before, not when I had this waiting for me at home.

I dragged her tongue out with mine and our mouths danced like long time lovers reunited. I couldn't let go of her, my hands dropping down to her ass, and she kissed me back deeper.

Her hand was on my neck and somehow her fingers had found my artery stroking the sensitive spot, making me even hotter for her, I thought momentarily about how long it would take us to get to the bedroom, and then Sookie's stomach made this massive growl.

We stopped kissing and I looked back at her in disbelief. She smiled up at me sheepishly and I asked her kidding…

"Was that Bigfoot?"

She swatted the side of my arm and shook her head replying…

"No Sweetheart, that was your child, and I think it's hungry."

I smirked and raised a brow asking her…

"Well child or not, it certainly didn't inherit that voice from me."

"I beg to differ."

I shook my head and looked her up and down as if she were an anomaly to me, which in a way she was and I knew then I was going to have fun trying out this new body of hers too. My eyes connected with her's wickedly and she shook her head refusing to back down.

"Oh beg all you want lover, but that doesn't mean I will back down."

Somehow, she saw right through me and as I grabbed her hand, she bumped her hip into me on purpose and teased as we left the room…

"You big stubborn Viking."

I smirked and surprised Sookie by picking her up in my arms and squeezing her ass. She squealed to my delight, and I had to do all I could from not ravishing her here right on the spot.

But Sookie's bladder saved us from any more sexual exploration to my dismay.

Sookie went to use my bathroom, and I went back down to finish our fish tacos with mango salsa and cabbage slaw salad. When Sookie got back I set down a heaping plate in front of her with a side of her grandmother's famous blueberry scones, and we dug in. I was right, they still tasted fresh. In fact the salsa had even more flavor after it had been allowed to ferment for a bit. Sookie had about 3 helpings, so by the time we were both done, we could no longer move.

As I was doing the dishes I realized Sookie was tired after she narrowly missed falling into her bowl of ice cream by mere inches. It was at that point; I knew we were most likely ready to turn in for the night. I dumped her half eaten bowl out and then swept her up in my arms and carried her back upstairs.

Despite our earlier attempts at foreplay, my body was ready to collapse after I had gotten Sookie settled and in bed. I pulled my shirt off, the last wavering thoughts of having sex falling by the wayside with the rest of my exhausted body. I know, if it hadn't been dead tired, it wasn't 3am and we hadn't spent the last 3 hours talking about feelings and shit, and not to forget the fight, my little hitch hike adventure, scaffolding walls, sneaking into girls bedrooms, getting caught by their grandmothers, and being ambushed by my shrink ex girlfriend, I may have found the energy to make a case for persuading the sleeping Sookie, but by the time I hit the sheets, I was out like a light. I didn't even get all my clothes off, I was dead to the world.

Just before dawn, I groggily found myself face to face with Sookie. She nuzzled her forehead into my neck and her warm breath coated my skin. I felt my insides churn in blissful delight pulling her closer to me as I pressed my cheek into her temple. I closed my eyes and inhaled her sweet scent, allowing the warm enchanting thoughts to carry me back off to dreamland when I was interrupted by her voice...

"Eric?"

I looked down at her tiredly and her dark eyes met mine, but she was clear and alert, and I wasn't expecting that.

"Yeah?"

I asked curiously wondering if something was wrong and I turned my body so I could get a better look at her.

She simply blinked and nodded her head as if she was answering something I had just asked, but I didn't recall asking her anything and finally she concluded...

"I'm ready to move in with you."

I raised my brows in disbelief. I couldn't believe my ears, wondering if I was still dreaming.

"Are you sure?" I heard myself ask her waiting on baited breath for her response and she nodded her head to my relief...

"Yes."

She bit her lip, and put her hand on my cheek and declared with a certainty that shook me to my very core…

"I don't want to spend another night away from you."

My pulse began to pump more blood into my rapidly beating heart and I paused for a moment and finally answered assuring her with a very happy grin.

"Then you won't."

And she smiled right back at me.


	27. Chapter 27

**AN: **Okay so first off I apologize for the delay of this update. Along with trying to cram in as much as I can with the end of the summer, the fuckery that is TB and messing up my ES chi, life and my job has been crazy busy lately. So the next chapter might chug along a little too. This chapter as you can tell is quite long. I didnt want to meddle with it any more, my brain is kind of fried with the emotional stuff, so I hope it makes sense. If it doesnt you know why. Mostly I just hope you understand the underlying message and most importantly, you likey, lol. Thanks again to all who read and review. I know some haven't enjoyed the journey as much because Eric and Sookie are often at odds, but I think they have finally reached a new level of understanding. So those of you who dont like the fighting, too bad, haha. No Im just kidding, but seriously, hopefully you can see the growth of these two at this point. The angst warning is still up, Im not a fluffy writer, but they are definately in different places than they were on day 1. Anyhow, going to stop rambling. Please read and review, and enjoy! Thanks again! xoxo

**Chapter 27-World on Fire**

_SPOV_

I woke up drenched in sunlight feeling alive and rejuvenated as if I had just been given some miracle potion to make everything look, feel, taste, and smell better. It was like the whole world was covered in a golden hue as the morning light weaved its way into his room behind the lavish drapes and lush bedroom fabrics.

I spotted my boyfriend still out cold next to me and I couldn't help but smile. I knew he was the reason I felt this way.

I was pretty sure I had passed out on him last night. A few bathroom trips during the night reminded me again why I was so tired. I had this nagging little feeling sluggishness would not improve any time soon. Nevertheless, I felt bad for cutting the night short.

I practiced one of my favorite pastimes watching him next to as his soft breath exhaled in and out, and then a wicked idea came to mind.

I arched my brow mimicking his signature move and slowly sat up next to him careful not to wake him. I peeled the sheets away from him delicately, feeling as if I was unwrapping a present and frowned when I realized he was still wearing his jeans. We really hadn't gotten a chance to do anything last night had we? I thought disappointed, noting we needed to render that little problem.

So, I carefully went to work on unbuttoning his fly and zipper, but as the zipper came down his eyelids fluttered awake and he muttered a groggy…

"What are you doing?"

I quickly attacked him with my lips sufficiently shutting him up, enjoying to be the one in control just as much as he did and after he was adequately suffocated no longer able to talk, I dove my hand down into his pants and I answered wickedly...

"I'm getting payback for yesterday."

He just smirked at me, but I kept massaging him making sure he was good and awake before I began my attack.

His eyes lit up in surprise, but then he relaxed allowing me free reign over his body as he closed his eyes and proclaimed.

"By any means, get all the payback you want." Eric replied with a lucid smirk after getting his breath back and I simply nodded my head.

His eyes met mine igniting that fire and I leaned in and pressed my lips to his navel knowing at that moment, I didn't have to worry about any intrusions. It felt surreal.

It hadn't really sunk in that I wasn't going back there. I almost couldn't believe that I agreed to move in with Eric myself, but when I gazed at him I knew there was no place I would rather be right now.

"Just wait cowboy, you haven't even begun to see what I can do to you!" I replied lowly and Eric raised his brow.

"You have me trembling in my pants lover, better get rid of them." He answered with a smile.

I smirked and went back to his waistline. Kissing along his fly gently, I finally grabbed both sides of his waist and tugged down.

_Hello Mr. Northman!_

I thought feasting my eyes upon the great spectacle before me. I met Eric's gaze with a hungry glint, licked my lips and then I put my mouth where my money was.

I thought I heard him gasp as I moved my tongue over his length as if I were licking a giant Popsicle, taunting him I saw his legs spread before me and I smiled, nestling my body in-between them.

He tasted amazing, and I felt my lady parts tingle when we made contact. I wanted to begin the torture before I lost myself in him, taking advantage of the control. Slowly, I pulled my nightgown over my head, allowing him to gaze upon my full aching breasts. I met his stare again and slid my panties moving to one side to toss them off the bed.

And then I went back down from the side, eyeing my unfinished feast hungrily. Instead of putting my lips on his hard length, I wanted to tease him, and kissed a trail up and down his thighs while my fingers and teeth moved lightly over his inner thighs.

I felt his fingers weave through my hair and my center grew wet when I spotted the small spot of white nectar on his tip. I was mere millimeters away from giving into temptation and tasting him when I felt Eric's large hands wrap around my waist and pull my body up to him.

I shrieked seeing a blur of colors flash by me. After the world finally stopped spinning I came to realize that I was now straddling Eric. But I wasn't straddling him in a traditional way; I was now looking down at his feet.

"Eric? What are you?" But as I centered my head I found his very aroused manhood staring me in the face, I felt his tongue dip inside me.

"Just relax." He replied as his stubble brushed over my sensitive folds, and I felt his tongue move deeper, rubbing abrasively along my clit.

I gasped, and swallowed as I felt my womanhood clench around his tongue.

My body stiffened and his large hands moved over my hips. He kissed me once and then repeated softly, his voice breathing hot air against my moist center...

"Relax..."

_Oh god, there was no way I could relax when he was doing that to me._ I didn't even know how we ended up this way, but we somehow had.

My vision blurred as I felt my muscles loosen under his skillful mouth and my legs parted. I gasped again, the pleasure now blindingly apparent. My knees slipped lowering my pelvis even closer to his face and he brought his hands to my thighs. I looked back for a moment and realized he was feasting on me like one would devour a sticky sweet tropical fruit.

I gasped again and as my spine arched in ecstasy, and then his thick arousal smacked me in the cheek. I tasted his fluids on the corner of my mouth and my hunger grew.

Staring him down as if I were gazing upon the Washington monument, I held him gently from the base and began to kiss then lick him.

His tongue moved faster as my mouth clamped down and within minutes he had brought me to my orgasm.

My legs shook, and I felt disoriented not knowing what should happen next, pretty sure Eric had not yet found his release. I leaned in, wanting to share this experience with him, but per usual, Eric had other intentions in mind.

He sat up behind me and I felt a dizzy sensation as blurs and whirls of colors flashed across my eyes once more and I somehow wound up slammed on my back with Eric's smug smile staring down at me.

"My turn." He replied with a devilish smirk.

I looked back at him still mystified, able to pull a few vague syllables together to form a coherent phrase.

"What…my turn?"

"Who said your turn was over?" He added with that wicked glint and then sunk his hard desire into my tender and aching sheath. My eyes rolled back in my head as my body swallowed his full size. The last thing I remember before going to that other world we often visited together was Eric smothering his burning mouth over mine.

xxxxx

I lay there in his arms and we kissed for what felt like hours. My body was numb, yet so blessedly alive as his hands skirted every square inch of my skin while we lay molded together like two clay pots.

Yes we definitely both got our turns, and a few times over, I thought with a lucid smile painted across my face.

I wasn't used to indulging myself like this, indulging in Eric and sex, having no one around to hold us accountable for our actions. I knew moments like these between us would be rare especially with everything going on around us, but I didn't care at the moment. I was going to take every perk I could get.

I stroked the soft patch of blonde hair below his belly button and looked back at him with swollen lips and aching body and he smiled gently. I returned his smile and layback down pressing my balmy cheek against his chest, enjoying the momentary bliss.

"What are you thinking about?" Eric finally asked after a few moments pause while his fingers twirled through my hair. I felt his heart rumble below my head and I confessed looking out the window feeling sulky because I knew this would soon be over…

"I'm thinking, I don't want to go anywhere today."

I pulled myself up to gaze at him, creasing my brows putting on the pout face and I asked him, trying to persuade him with my puppy dog eyes…

"Would it be so bad if we just camped out in bed all day?"

I looked up at him and he smiled faintly but then it straightened and his eyes darkened in sadness, and then I suddenly remembered what we had to do today and I felt terrible. In an attempt to yank my foot out of my mouth I added pulling myself off him…

"That was if we didn't have…"

"It's okay." He answered cutting me off. I closed my eyes in regret and whispered…

"I'm sorry I didn't mean…"

I was searching for my words when Eric sat up and then I knew I had really done it. How could I have been so insensitive? I wondered angry with my self.

He leaned his head against the headboard and replied with a sigh…

"I didn't think this day would ever get here."

He took a deep breath and continued…

"I thought this is what I wanted, I can't count how many times I had wished it would finally be over, that there could be peace…But, now that it's here…I don't really want to leave this bed either."

He looked at me and then down at his hands, his voice filled with emotion and I thought he was going to say something more but he couldn't and I leaned back into him and pressed my lips over his heart whispering…

"Saying goodbye is never easy nor fun."

My eyes flashed with his, knowing both of us had been forced to deal with losing loved ones. It was something that brought us closer, but it was still terribly painful to go through.

"No it's not." He agreed softly and ran his hand through my hair soothingly once more. I closed my eyes enjoying his touch, but I couldn't help but get a sense of isolation from him. I didn't want him to feel like he had to go through this alone but before I could say anything he sat up.

"Ill make us some breakfast before we have to leave." Eric announced rising from the bed, totally at ease in the buff. Not that he had anything to hide. He was perfect.

Me on the other hand, had many more flaws. I took the sheet and nodded as he found a clean pair of slacks from his closet and slid them on.

I found myself mesmerized by the curvature in his backside as he pulled them up to rest comfortably over his hips. Yes he was a spectacle Id give him that, I thought feeling my cheeks warm.

But I knew playtime was over for the day. Now we had to deal with the grown up stuff. I couldn't help but worry again that Eric had something more he wasn't telling me, something more about Godric perhaps? I knew he had to deal with his grief in his own way but sometimes it was scary not knowing what was going on behind those blue eyes.

Ultimately, I just hoped I could get the carefree, happy, confident, and strong Eric back when we returned home tonight.

He cast me a lopsided smile as he threw on his dress shirt leaving it unbuttoned and went into the bathroom to brush his teeth.

I frowned because my eye candy was gone, and also because I realized I had to get up and stop being so lazy. I dropped the covers and made a beeline for my suitcase. Since I knew we were going to the cemetery first I opted for my black dress with red floral accents. I was thankful it didn't wrinkle in the case. I slipped into a clean pair of panties and matching bra, and realized I should move my new clothes into the dresser space Eric made for me.

I couldn't very well call this home if I was still living out of my suitcase right? I couldn't say it felt like home quite yet though, it felt more like a vacation. Maybe once I could bring some of my own stuff over it would feel more familiar. But as I took a look around the room, I noted Eric's lavish elegantly decorated room with fine silks and linens, and I wondered what I could actually put in here that didn't look like it belonged in a barn. Could I fit into Eric's world as easily as he had fit into mine?

I took a deep breath catching myself in the middle of my cynicism and I put a stop. I didn't want to be like that anymore. I didn't want to only see the bad things in people; I wanted to see the good too.

This was a new life for me. Albeit a very scary new life, but I was going to have a baby with the man I loved and now we were moving in together. What was so bad about that?

I glanced down at my stomach for the first time feeling like things might finally be looking up for us and took another deep breath then swept my mess of blonde hair up into a clip.

Yes, I wasn't the same Sookie Stackhouse I had known a month ago. I felt older now, I thought as I gazed at my reflection in the mirror. I didn't notice any lines or gray hair or anything, but there was something in my eyes that made me feel like I had lived through many lifetimes.

Eric was done in the bathroom his white starched shirt now buttoned to my disappointment and then he came over to me to nuzzle his lips in my neck. My skin tingled from his touch and amazing scent. I smiled and he asked me huskily…

"Are you hungry?"

_Why was it whenever Eric said something my mind traveled into the gutter? _I looked back at him and nodded my head with a smile. Actually I was starving. We had gotten quite the work out this morning and I replied…

"Famished."

Eric smirked and answered…

"Good, then you will get a feast and a taste of my special home made hot chocolate."

That sounded divine, I thought, smiling back at him I confessed…

"I can't wait."

He leaned in to kiss me sweetly and my mouth lingered over his for a moment before he finally pulled away and left the room.

He certainly knew how to make an entrance and exit I thought, longing for him before he even made it down the stairs.

I could tell he was trying to keep it together, and hoped things could stay the way they were between us.

I imagined Eric slaving away in the kitchen, cooking for me and covered in chocolate and it brought a smile to my face.

But after I pulled open one of the dresser drawers to put away my undies and I spotted Eric's journal resting on top of it my smile dissolved.

It gave me a strange uneasy feeling when I saw the journal again, because it made me think of all the pain and hardships that Eric had gone through and possibly the long road we still had ahead. I knew Eric still had demons he was battling with, things that maybe I had no right to know, but where did that leave him? I heard stories from my Grandfather about the war.

He told me some men were never the same again once they came back. I knew Eric was close to Godric, they were like brothers, but now that he was gone, now that Eric was left alone once again by someone he cared for deeply, what if it was too much for him to handle? What if this burial was the straw that broke the camels back?

I hoped I was being unreasonable, getting myself worked up for nothing. But after I had cleaned myself off, changed, and gotten ready, I still didn't feel any better.

When I returned downstairs to find Eric the scene I walked in on actually made things worse.

Pam was there dressed to the nines in her Charcoal gray Chanel skirt suit and black Jimmy Choo pumps with her arms wrapped around Eric tightly, her head pressed to his neck tenderly and hands spread firmly along his back.

Her eyes were shut tight and when he leaned in to kiss her cheek she shut them even tighter. I felt like I was walking in on a private moment between the two of them, one that I shouldn't have witnessed. It made me feel sad, like an outsider. As the moments turned to seconds and then even longer seconds I began to worry that this could possibly be something more going on between them. I suddenly felt ill.

I looked down and began to dig through my purse because well frankly there wasn't much else I could do at the moment and finally they parted.

"Sookie!" Eric noticed me standing there first, casting me a painful smile and he explained…

"Pam is going to drive over to the cemetery with us and then she can drop us off at my friends car shop after to pick up the Vette."

"I see that." I replied casting Pam a disdained glance trying to hide the sharpness in my voice, but it was there nevertheless.

I felt so stupid needing to get out of here, I announced…

"I'm ready whenever you are, in fact I can start up the car, Ill get the keys."

I announced and went into the other room wondering if this was supposed to be my new home, how come I felt like I should be miles away from here right now? I shuddered when my mind couldn't help but turn again to the thought that what if Jason really was right?

What if Eric wasn't over Pam? I mean lets face it, how many people stayed as close as Eric did to his ex? It wasn't normal, or healthy. I knew they had gone through a lot together, but I wasn't an idiot either and I didn't want to look like one.

"Sookie?"

Eric came after me and I turned to face him, Pam trailing behind and I felt my blood suddenly boil with jealousy at the sight of her concerned face.

"Sookie is something wrong?" Eric asked, but one look at Pam and I knew she'd deny any of it. God I hated thinking this way, I trusted Eric, but what if he didn't realize he still had these feelings for Pam? What if he had been trying to deny himself and do the right thing by me? Things between us were too good to be true lately. I didn't want to be the fool they both most likely thought I was and I shook my head and replied pulling myself together…

"No everything is fine, I just don't want us to be late." I concluded. Secretly wondering if Pam's car was big enough for all three of us.

Eric glanced at me puzzled for a moment and he insisted…

"Well we still should have enough time to fit in breakfast…I thought you were hungry?"

_No don't do that, don't push back_, I thought to myself my nostrils flaring. I glared at him and shook my head insisting…

"No."

Eric's pride was wounded, I knew that much. I wanted to reach out to him but I was too afraid, too conflicted. It wasn't fair. So I stood my ground stubbornly refusing to budge.

"Eric maybe you can make that breakfast to go." Pam suggested calmly and added…

"Id like to talk to Sookie."

I glared flames at Pam feeling like a caged lion and I answered sharply….

"I don't think that's necessary."

But Pam gave no reaction shook her head and insisted…

"No honey, it is, let's go outside."

I honestly wanted to rip Pam a new one by the time we had gotten out to Eric's front porch and I shook my head defiantly, already prepared to tune her out. I was sick of her meddling.

"I'm not going to lecture you." Pam declared right off the bat.

Okay that did it. I was done with this whole lab rat routine.

"Excuse me? Seriously, I should alert the press? Hell must be freezing over because the day you decide to shut up, it must mean the apocalypse is coming!"

"Why don't we take a short walk?" She suggested ignoring my obvious hostility and sarcasm.

Pam raised her brows expectantly and I took a seat stubbornly on the bench crossing my legs refusing to budge.

"Okay, well I have to say I'm confused."

I just rolled my eyes, trying to channel a nice vacant beach somewhere, somewhere I could find my peace, and Pam continued much to my dislike…

"Eric told me you said you were planning on moving in with him…I think that's wonderful. Congratulations!"

"Yeah, hearing that from you makes my life complete now!"

Pam folded her arms and she addressed me directly glaring down at me…

"So you can imagine my surprise when I was greeted in the fashion I was this morning, seriously Sookie, what gives?"

"Why don't you tell me? You're so good at head shrinking us!"

I glared at her and replied begrudgingly…

"Tell me Pam, what is going on in my poor misguided little small town head?"

"Small town?"

"Don't even pretend that you don't know what I'm talking about."

She pursed her lips and shifted over to her other foot and she nodded her head, taking the seat beside me.

I slid over as far as I could go away from her toxicity and she continued…

"You're right, I'm sorry."

I raised my brows because I thought I just heard Pam admit I was right and she continued…

"I know I overstep my bounds with you two sometimes…But last night you both were on a one way trip to catastrophe."

I looked back at her and I replied…

"Why don't you let Eric and I be the judge of that."

Pam nodded her head and admitted…

"Okay."

I looked at her again confused and she insisted…

"You are mature adults, I don't see why I can't let you both call the shots, so unless you ask me directly, I wont say a thing."

_Excuse me?_ I looked at her as if she were growing a set of horns and asked…

"Is this some sort of shrink trick? Because I assure you, it won't be pretty for you if it is."

Pam shook her head and answered softly…

"No…no tricks. My only concern right now is having us all get along today. Clearly you and Eric were doing just fine before I came by this morning."

She paused for a moment after my long silence and then Pam asked the inevitable…

"Sookie, you seem really angry now and I'm afraid I've caused it. Would you like me to leave?"

My head snapped back towards her confused again and I shook my head answering quickly in surprise…

"No."

She and Eric had gone through a lot together, I knew that. I didn't like it, but I knew it. I figured she had just as much right to be at Godric's burial as Eric did. And then I was reminded again why today was important to Eric. I suddenly felt childish flinching my brow in guilt and I shook my head not wanting her to think I was this high-strung jealous bitch…

"I'm sorry, I think this day has just gotten the best of me." I confessed lowering my guard, not really wanting to fight right now.

Pam nodded and she answered…

"It's gotten the best of all of us, I think."

She put her hand on her face, and for the first time I noticed how tired and stressed out Pam had become and she explained…

"I knew this day would come, but I wasn't so sure we would all be here to see Godric buried…This last year has been hell, first with Godric's divorce and then his spiraling depression. Eric had to keep everything together during all of it, and I felt helpless because neither would turn to me, and then when Godric finally ended it all and Eric was arrested, it was horrible."

I glanced back at Pam seeing a grief stricken woman sitting next to me and I realized this experience must be just as painful to her as it was to Eric, if not more so because she couldn't help. I knew how that felt. Especially with Eric. It was hard to get inside his head. Although she drove me crazy sometimes, it made sense now as to why Pam had meddled so much in Eric's and my affairs. She felt guilty for Godric. For the first time the patient finally got to see her shrink for what she was—a human being.

Strangely this role reversal comforted me in a way I never thought possible. She and Eric needed each other just as I needed Eric and he needed me. And maybe, just maybe we needed her too.

I glanced back at her and she looked at me and I wrapped my arms around her and confessed softly….

"I want you here Pam."

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

I had no idea what was going on with either Sookie or Pam but when I looked out the window and saw them hugging, I nearly fell backwards.

Sookie had definitely been acting differently since I had left her alone in the bedroom and I couldn't even begin to guess what had upset her so much. I wondered if it was some hormone thing, if it was then I definitely had my work cut out for me over the next 9 months.

But now they were hugging and smiling and Pam was even laughing, so I hoped whatever it was had passed.

I dared to pour the hot chocolate in a ceramic pitcher and pile up the rest of the pastries along with some fresh fruit on a large plate.

"Is it safe?" I asked displaying my tray as a peace offering and I explained as they both glanced up at me…

"This stuff wouldn't really package well, so if you want any, now is the time."

I set the tray down on the coffee table and Sookie took my hand.

"Per usual, you outdid yourself darling!" Pam replied with an endearing smirk as she surveyed the food in front of her.

"But we can't very well have hot chocolate without cups can we?"

I noticed I had forgotten the cups and I let go of Sookie's hand, but Pam stood and she announced…

"No, Ill get them. You both relax."

I met Pam's gaze reluctantly but before I could protest she was already gone and Sookie was tugging me down to sit besides her.

I glanced at Sookie and she returned my gaze offering a small smile and then she leaned her head into my shoulder. Yes things had definitely improved and I was very thankful for whatever Pam had said. I brought my arm up to rest across her back.

We both watched the road in front of my house and Sookie confessed with a sigh….

"I'm sorry for being so crazy."

"You?"

I turned my head towards her in curiosity wondering what really did transpire between the two women and I decided to provoke her a little to dig a little deeper.

"I'm afraid that's impossible," I remarked with a smirk meeting her gaze with a flickering glint and she flipped her eyes at me, and concluded...

"Don't be a smart ass Buster."

"Buster? Again?" I raised my brows and she smiled sweetly leaning on my arm and then she confessed...

"Just wait, you thought you wanted to live with me 24/7 but you may rethink that in 9 months."

"So are you saying in 9 months you will turn into a fire breathing dragon?" I asked jokingly and she shook her head trying not to laugh.

"You are such an ass."

"Yes I am, so why don't you just shut up and kiss me." I answered wanting to just get to the point. I could tell how she was really feeling if she was kissing me.

She rolled her eyes and shook her head off to the side but I pulled her chin back to my mouth and our lips melted together with a tender passion. She brought her hand up to my face gently and tilted her head up to meet mine.

I was comforted by the fact that we were on the same page once more. I really needed that today. I couldn't help but feel better already knowing Sookie was here with me for this. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to my best friend and I was worried earlier about her change in mood, but I knew like most things, it just had to run its course.

I was enjoying the lip lock a little too much when I heard a rumble below us and realized the noise was coming from Sookie. I pulled back to look at her and her cheeks grew red. I smirked recognizing the sound before she even spoke and I replied unable to resist a little poking...

"So you weren't hungry after all hmm?"

She simply stuck her tongue out and grabbed one of the pastries and then replied in between chomps...

"Be careful or Ill scorch you with my fire breath."

I took one of the pasties and bit into it suggestively adding...

"If you wake me up again like you did this morning, you can do whatever you want with your fire breath."

She blushed again as she swallowed and then Pam came back out with the ceramic cups and she announced...

"I talked to Spencer, they will meet us at the cemetery in 30 minutes."

I looked back at her and nodded, the reality flooding back in like a bucket of cold water. I suddenly felt my appetite leave me as I realized the moment was almost here and I forced myself to swallow the rest of my bite. Trying to keep it together for me and everyone else I replied in a serious tone...

"Good, we can go once we are done here."

Pam nodded her head as if she understood and then we finished our breakfast in virtual silence.

xxxxxxx

When we arrived, I felt this sudden urge to get back in Pam's car and have her turn us around, but I knew I had to be here right now. It was time to let go.

Sookie took my hand for which I was grateful and I squeezed it tightly as we walked the stone pathway over to the gravesite. It felt as if we were walking the plank to the underworld. I spotted Mike Spencer from the mortuary and he raised his hand waving to us. And then I saw Godric's casket and my feet froze.

There was an American flag covering it and two representatives from the core to present me with it. The other man held a trumpet.

I had been to a number of these after I was deployed. Back then Godric and I were young and invincible. The soldiers, who fell, died for a good cause but we chose to celebrate life. We could do any thing; the world was ours for the taking. I never envisioned a day like this for each of us. I never once saw the end of that tunnel, as I did standing here now facing this black day. I felt a lump form in my throat knowing what was coming as Sookie coaxed me gently...

"Eric?"

I glanced back at her not wanting to do this. That could just as easily have been me. Why couldn't it have been me? I thought guiltily remembering all Godric had done for me. He was a war hero. He saved my life and this was how I repaid him?

"It's okay." Sookie whispered before Pam turned around noting my delay.

I looked into Pam's eyes and she nodded, and I knew I had to do this.

My reluctant feet finally followed with Sookie by my side, I took a deep breath inhaling and exhaling the air as if each breath was my last until we finally reached the casket.

"Good morning." Mike Spencer replied nodding to us and Sookie and Pam answered back...

"Morning."

He searched the landscape behind us and he asked with a brow raised in question...

"Is it just you three?"

Both Pam and Sookie glanced back at me and I nodded in reply. I could have invited the bar staff, and a couple of Godric's casual friends, but I felt a private ceremony was more fitting. I thought Godric would have wanted it that way.

"Yes." I finally answered and he replied...

"Well then I guess we can begin."

He looked to the two men and then started reading aloud from his book.

"We gather here today to remember our dearly departed friend, Sergeant Godric Godfrey. He will be remembered for his years of service, tour of duty in Iraq and for the loved ones he left behind. But most of all, he will be missed and loved by those standing here who were closest to him. God's purpose for mankind is that we honor, serve, and fellowship with Him. "

_He stopped and looked back at us and asked..._

_"Is there any thing you would like to add?"_

_He met_ Pam's gaze, but I could tell she was also trying to keep it together and she stepped up to Godric's coffin, placed one yellow rose on the head and answered quietly...

"Be at peace now my dear friend."

I saw Sookie begin to tear up, and she followed Pam with a second rose from the bouquet Pam had purchased to mark his grave.

She simply touched his casket and she replied softly...

"I wish I could have met you Godric, but I know you will be missed."

Then they turned to me and Spencer replied gently...

"Mr. Northman?"

I glanced back at him and at the other men in uniform and creased my brows and nodded my head replying...

"I have something I would like to read."

He nodded his head and I took out the small piece of paper from my suit jacket pocket and unfolded it slowly. It felt surreal to be standing here, in front of his grave, where the dirt was black 6 feet below us, looking down at Godric's eternal tomb. I knew shortly his body would be lowered into the cradle of life to become nothingness just like how he began.

My eyes glazed over and then I explained as if I had stepped outside myself to watch...

"It's a poem...by Walt Whitman."

I finally looked down at the sheet of paper and began slowly with dry mouth...

"O Captain my Captain!"

I swallowed trying to find the courage to go on and keep my voice from cracking.

_"Our fearful trip is done. The ship has weathered every rack; the prize we sought is won. The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting, while follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring; But O heart! heart! heart! O the bleeding drops of red."_

I could see his blood on my hands and dripping on the floor as if I was back in that room and I felt the heaviness press against my chest. Taking a deep breath I tried to brush it away and continued.

_"Where on the deck my Captain lays, Fallen cold and dead. O Captain! My Captain! Rise up and hear the bells; Rise up-for you the flag is flung for you the bugle trills, for you bouquets and ribboned wreaths. For you the shores a-crowding, for you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning; here Captain! This arm beneath your head! It is some dream that on the deck, you've fallen cold and dead."_

The pressure became too strong and I struggled to breath a gasp coming out instead and then the tears came. I felt a hand take mine as the words became a blurry mess but I had to go on, like he had gone on for me.

_"My Captain does not answer."_

I flinched as my voice shook remembering him as I had found him and I struggled to gain control once more digging down deep for the strength I held her hand tighter.

_"His lips are pale and still; My brother does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will; The ship is anchored safe and sound, its voyage closed and done; From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won; Exult O shores, and ring O bells! But I, with mournful tread, walk the deck my Captain lies, fallen cold and dead."_

I blinked tears from my eyes folding the piece of paper back up shoving it into my pocket and pulled out his dog tags from my neck. I looked down at them and read his name one last time before I walked over to the head of the coffin and laid it over the roses.

Whispering...

"I hope you find your peace my brother. Godspeed."

I wiped the salty tears from my cheek and turned back around and saw Sookie's stained face staring back at me, and then I noticed Pam had slid on a pair of large sunglasses. At that moment it hit me that he was really gone.

Sookie stepped forward to take my hand as I turned around to face the coffin once more. And then Spencer turned to the two uniformed men who stepped on either side of the coffin and lifted the flag. They turned it around and corner by corner folded it in to form the shape of a triangle.

The younger one presented the flag to me...

"Sergeant Eric Northman, we present this flag to you in memory of our fallen brother Sergeant Godric Godfrey on behalf of the United States of America. In God We Trust."

I took the flag from him and he nodded and marched back to the side.

"We will now lower the coffin." Spencer replied getting assistance from the soldier who had presented me with the flag they turned a crank and Godric slowly began to lower into the ground. In the background the other veteran played TAPS on his trumpet.

Sookie squeezed my hand and leaned her head into my chest. I curled my fingers around her hand and reached over to put my other arm around Pam's shoulder as we watched him sink into his tomb. We drew our strength from each other and looked on cementing this scene into our minds forever. I felt like he had taken a piece of me with him. I would never forget him. Godric. My friend, my fellow soldier, my brother.

"_Goodbye Godric_," I muttered for all of us as the last chord echoed through our ears. The wind whistled around us and I questioned whether or not there really was a place we went after we died, and whether or not Godric was there now. I hoped he had finally found his peace.

It had been a long and draining morning, but once we were finally able to put Godric to rest, Pam dropped Sookie and me off at Bobby's Repair shop where I retrieved my Corvette. From there we had a little time to kill before the appointment, neither of us really in the mood for anything overly upbeat, I stopped at a little deli and we bought some sandwiches. We ate them down by the river both of us enjoying the quiet August afternoon and then it was time.

Sookie seemed anxious. To me this felt like going into an alien world. When we stepped into the clinic there were books and stuffed toys and a little table with some sort of wire sliding block contraption. The nurse checked Sookie in and told her the doctor would be with us.

"So you have done this before?" I asked her with a exhaled breath a few long moments after we had taken our seats and Sookie nodded her head and looked out at the toys by the table, then she confessed...

"Yes, I went to a place in Bon Temps, but it wasn't as nice as this clinic."

"Hopefully the doctor knows what she is doing." I replied and Sookie corrected me...

"It's a he and apparently comes highly recommended by Pam."

"Well that doesn't mean much. Granted, it does take a lot to win her approval that much is true, but if he was a flirt, knew all his nurses names, birth dates and zodiac signs, and was able to recite the new men's line at Versace she would be putty in his hands."

Sookie looked at me and she smirked. I glanced at her curiously wondering what was so funny and asked her...

"What?"

She chuckled to herself and she replied...

"It sounded like you were describing yourself just now."

I met her gaze in question and she explained...

"Don't look surprised, I happened to notice a few Versace suits hanging in your closet, and your waitresses love you, you big flirt...I wouldn't be surprised if you knew their zodiac signs too."

I rolled my eyes and I met her gaze with a flicker proving her right by confessing...

"Only a Gemini know-it-all would ever make a presumption like that."

She raised her brow and then she replied...

"You better believe it, don't underestimate me sweetheart."

"I never have and never will." I confessed with a smug smirk realizing we might be here awhile I took a magazine. It was an old _National Geographic_ and began flipping through the pages as Sookie asked me...

"Speaking of Birthdays, I don't believe you ever told me yours."

I sighed already bored with the subject of my birthday and I replied...

"It doesn't really matter does it? I never really celebrate anyway, not unless Pam drags me out with her to get smashed."

I met her gaze and she frowned slightly and then she replied still persistent...

"I'm having your baby for Pete's sake Eric, I think I've earned the right to know."

I glanced at her and then looked back down at my magazine having the funny feeling that this would be her new guilt trip phrase from this day forward…_I'm having your baby, I gave birth to your children, I raised them and this is the gratitude I get?_ Yes I could hear it all now. This could go on forever. Fortunately for Sookie it worked and I finally answered reluctantly...

"August 25th."

Sookie's smile broadened smugly apparently impressed by her newly learned persuasion tactics. Then she stared at me as if I was missing something and I couldn't help but look back at her wondering again what was so funny.

"That's only a couple weeks away." Sookie declared with a cat that ate the canary like grin.

"Yeah so?"

"That's the same weekend of your party isn't it?"

_Oh Shit._ Why could this conversation not have happened 3 weeks from now? I would have even settled for two weeks and one day, I thought now finding yet another reason to be agitated today. I looked directly back at Sookie wanting her to know that I didn't want anyone to make a big deal about this, let alone her, but just as I was about to object the nurse came out and called Sookie's name...

"Sookie Stackhouse? The doctor will see you now."

"That's us." Sookie declared nervously as she stood up and pulled her purse over her shoulders. I got up after her knowing now that it was pointless to argue with Sookie about something so frugal, especially when I could tell she was practically shaking like a leaf. I rolled my eyes hating the fates sometimes and then I followed them into the examination room.

They took Sookie's weight, temperature and blood pressure first and then the nurse left Sookie with one of those hospital gowns to change in.

I offered to stand outside since I knew she was already feeling stressed but she shook her head. One by one her shoes came off followed by her dress. I watched in awe at the new swell of her hips and breasts filled up her bra and underwear to the brim.

"This clinical sterile thing kind of takes all the fun out of it doesn't it?" Sookie replied with a reluctant smile as she unhooked her bra exposing naked back and I could see we were definitely not on the same page. Clinical and sterile tables plus bad lighting didn't really make much difference to me.

She turned around, slipped off her panties and leaned over to put her clothes away under the chair and just as I arched my neck hoping to catch a glimpse of those elysian fields of hers there was a knock at the door and Sookie straightened back up rigidly.

A man poked his head in; a much younger man than I had anticipated and he smiled and replied...

"Is it safe to come in?"

Not really, I thought as Sookie rushed to the seat next to me.

"Yes Doctor, I'm ready." Sookie smiled politely and crossed her legs.

"Good." He replied with a smile and stepped inside the door. He put his hand out and replied...

"I'm Dr. Alcide Herveaux, it's nice to finally meet you both!"

I sized him up and realized this guy must have spent a lot of time in the gym. I would never forgive Pam if she recommended some meathead doctor to us.

Sookie took his hand and answered politely with a small blush...

"Yes, its great to finally put a face to the name. Pam has told me a lot about you."

The Doctor smiled modestly and he remarked...

"I hope it wasn't all bad." He smirked at Sookie and I suddenly felt like the third wheel in the room. Was this jerk actually flirting with my girlfriend?" I wondered my blood starting to heat up with every passing second, making a mental list of all of the strikes he was adding up this afternoon.

"No of course not, you came highly recommended." Sookie smiled, now clearly more at ease.

"That has yet to be determined." I answered firmly and Sookie glanced at me the smile leaving her face for a moment before she went on...

"I was wondering if you happened to know when we can find out the sex of the baby Dr. Herveaux?"

"Well..." He looked as if he was pondering the question. I didn't think it was that difficult a question and was about to say something when he asked Sookie...

"Sookie why don't you get up on the table, I can explain as we go along."

"You look very young to be an OBGYN Herveaux, are you sure there isn't an older Doctor who might be more qualified to check her out...Sookie's health is very important to me as is our babies."

"Eric!" Sookie exclaimed in shock, but Herveaux simply smiled and replied...

"Sookie's health and her babies is our first priority, Mr. Stackhouse, and I assure you I am more than qualified. I have delivered over 100 babies at Shreveport Medical alone, that was after I transferred here from Mississippi"

"It's Northman." I corrected him and he looked back from me to Sookie and he replied caught off guard...

"Oh I apologize, I thought you were married."

Sookie glared back at me and I looked at her and then shook my head.

The Doctor proceeded to put his hand on Sookie's abdomen and he replied...

"Can you breathe in and out for me?"

"Yes, that's it."

My eyes burned holes into his hand that was venturing lower and lower with every passing millisecond and he explained despite my outrage...

"In answer to your question, You can find out the babies gender as early as 16 weeks...You are just at 7 weeks now so when I do the ultrasound you most likely wont see much. But we do this early just to make sure everything looks normal, and there are no strange discolorations or growths anywhere. Basically the first exam is to go over what to expect in your pregnancy and to make sure you have a healthy body to go through it in."

Sookie nodded and he asked her to lie flat on her back and put her feet in the stirrups. I felt every muscle in my body tense when he put on his surgical gloves and got out the lubricant.

"This is just going to feel a little cold, I'm going to give you a quick cervical exam and then we can get to the good part."

I rolled my eyes wondering if he really got off on this sort of thing. Asshole probably did, I thought casting him a dark glare.

Sookie nodded and then her eyes fell on me. She looked scared. I hated this jerk, but I knew I needed to be here for Sookie now like she had been there for me this morning and I stood up to stand next to her and take her hand in mine.

I knew I had to take her mind off this, I knew I had to take my mind off this before I slugged this guy and got myself thrown out of the clinic and I finally asked him...

"Where in Mississippi are you from?"

He had a penlight on and was clearly looking at Sookies very private parts. I clenched my free hand as the moments of silence passed us by and then he finally replied looking up at me...

"Jackson, it's where I did my residency too."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah."

He took out one tool and replaced it with another flipping the switch on a machine next to him and he replied...

"Sometimes I miss it there, I miss my family, but Shreveport has more resources, more opportunities."

"You ever hear of a place called Josephines?" I asked him and his eyes met mine with a flicker of recognition.

"Yeah...You'd have to live under a rock to not brush by that place."

"Lot's of bikers in there, so do you run with that crowd?"

"Eric, I'm sure he doesn't want to talk about his personal life. You don't have to answer that Dr. Herveaux." Sookie replied intercepting.

"No its okay." Alcide smiled at her flashing his pearly whites. He cast me a momentary glare of disapproval under his gaze and he replied...

"I used to, but I lost some very dear people to me, my family and haven't been back since."

He took out what looked like a battery charger, handed Sookie a blanket to cover her lower body and he asked her getting back to business…

"Can I have you roll up your gown Sookie? This will be a little cold, but I promise it's worth it."

I wasn't about to admit that I felt guilty for my early badgering know that we knew he had experienced loss, just like I had, just like Sookie. The wounds were still too new, having just re-opened them today, I knew how difficult it was to say goodbye to a loved one. We both did.

"Of course, and I'm so sorry about your family." Sookie replied but the doctor just shook his head and he replied...

"It was a long time ago...Now I just concentrate on bringing new lives into the world and introducing them to their happy new families, it's much more rewarding work and it keeps me sane."

He smiled again and Sookie smiled back. She wrapped her fingers around my hand and I decided just to let it drop. We were here to see our baby anyway; I didn't really care who the messenger was.

He turned on a screen and explained...

"Well first off, you are perfectly healthy, and your cervix is well shaped for child birthing. I don't think you will have much trouble at all delivering naturally should you choose to do that.

I looked back at him mystified and then he concluded...

"Secondly, this tool is used for the ultrasound. The sonogram image allows us to see inside of your uterus.

He angled the monitor towards us and I saw what appeared like white clouds with a tiny black circle in the center.

"This is your uterus. As you go through your pregnancy this black circle will grow larger and you will be able to see more definition inside it."

I narrowed my gaze and tried to search for something to make out, anything, but it looked like a cloudy blob. Then he adjusted the screen and all of the sudden I could see it.

"In reality your baby is probably no larger than the size of a peanut right now, but through technology we can look at your uterus through a magnifying glass."

He pointed to the screen to the top of what looked like the shape of a bean and he explained...

"This is your babies head."

He pointed to the curvy line that wrapped around the blob and extended down and he replied...

"And this is the spine...You cant quite make out the legs or arms yet, but don't worry, they are there."

I was utterly speechless and Sookie brought her fingers to the glass pointing to a spot obviously just as mesmerized as me...

"What's this? It looks like a little flashing light."

The doctor smiled, he looked back at us both and he replied...

"That is your babies heartbeat."

I gasped in amazement thinking it was so tiny, probably in reality no bigger than a kernel of popcorn if even that.

Sookie smiled and glanced at me, both of us caught up in the moment, bonded through this experience. That was our baby on that screen, the life we had created together. It was amazing to watch it as if it were here with us right now; this new little being that was about to come into our lives. I thought momentarily of my own father and how he had missed out on all of this and vowed that I never would miss a thing in this child's life. It was riveting, electrifying, it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

xxxxxxx

After leaving the clinic it was like a light had been turned on. It made everything seem so much clearer and vibrant; it made me realize what really mattered. We had the rest of the afternoon to ourselves. Sookie was excited and she wanted to show her grandmother the sonogram pictures so we drove back to Bon Temps and had dinner with Adele, Jason, and Tara.

I didn't expect to be spending the rest of my day off with Sookie's family. Not that I didn't want to see them, but strangely it felt right, it felt comforting, it felt like home. It was surreal to be talking about this little life we hadn't even met yet, but in a strange way it was exciting too, not knowing what lay ahead, but knowing it was big, and it would change our lives forever. It already had.

Dr. Herveaux had left us with a list of do's and don'ts as well as a book list and a calendar to mark off appointments as well as chart where we were in the pregnancy. Yes I said 'we'. For the first time I really sincerely felt like this baby was really mine, well, ours. I felt like I could truly face him or her now. Despite all of my mistakes, despite my lack of father figure, I felt like I could do this. We could do this. Things were finally starting to fit.

Adele was ecstatic to see the pictures and learn that Sookie was moving in with me. Jason seemed happy about that too, although he was too proud to admit it, and Tara begged Sookie not to disappear from Bon Temps forever and Sookie agreed. But Adele washed all that worry away by making us all promise to be present and accounted for at least one Sunday dinner a week.

Sookie insisted that she was still going to work as long as she could so she would continue to make the drive to Bon Temps until she could no longer move. I didn't know how I felt about that, but I knew it was pointless to argue.

We played a game of Monopoly after dinner, one of my favorite games, but Sookie cleaned the floor with all of us. I had to admit I was strangely impressed, albeit jealous for her lucky winning streak. I made her promise a rematch for next week and Sookie agreed to it with a smug grin, milking her conquest for all it was worth, I some how wound up doing dish detail and sweeping off the front porch, while dessert was prepared.

After Adele had stuffed us to the gills with good southern home cooking, we finally dragged ourselves home.

It was pitch dark by the time I rolled up into my driveway in Shreveport. Sookie was tired, but not too tired to pick up where we left off this morning. Neither was I, but there was something I wanted to do first. Something I needed to do.

We got inside the house and Sookie began to kiss me, and I knew where this was going. Before I lost all control I told her to wait in the living room for me. I started up my gas fireplace leaving her with one last kiss as a promise of things to come.

"I'll be right back."

I promised with a small smile and she nodded.

A few minutes later I returned. Sookie smiled at me and she asked…

"Is everything okay?"

I nodded and took out my black journal from behind my back and showed it to her.

Her gaze met mine worriedly when she saw the book and I explained…

"If you want to look through it, you can. But I intend to end this tonight."

Sookie looked confused and I sat down next to her on the couch took her hand in mine and explained…

"You see a very wise woman I know told me once that she was happier when she put her past behind her."

Sookie smiled faintly, and she put her hand over the leather bound cover looking at me in question, and I encouraged her…

"You can open it if you want, I have nothing to hide from you."

She creased her brows, and I knew she was remembering the funeral today and what she had learned earlier about Godric and this journal and she finally replied softly…

"I don't need to see it, if there is anything you want to tell me, I would rather hear and see it from you."

I met her gaze mystified for a moment by her words, confused a little too and I replied trying to think of something anything I could offer her that she didn't already know or that I didn't want to leave behind and then I remembered something.

"There is one thing I could show you."

Her eyes were unwavering and calm and I felt like I could truly tell her anything right now.

I gently lifted the book back and I flipped through the worn pages all the way to the last one, and then I handed the book back to her.

There were only a few words but I felt above all this is what mattered most to me and I explained as we both looked down at the words…

"This was my last journal entry."

She put her hand on the page opposite the letter and scooted closer to me for a better view. And then we began to read the words written there.

Dear Godric: I wish you were here right now so I could tell you what a fuck up you were. You really disappointed me by taking the coward's way out. After all we went through back in the gulf, after being friends for so long, after serving together, you decide to crap out on me like this. And now my life is so fucked up you wouldn't even believe it.

_Your sorry ass suicide got me in trouble with the law, and now I'm stuck in this little hole in the wall town and I cant touch the bar until the charges are cleared. You are a fucking son of a bitch Godric Godfrey. Sergeant and war hero my ass! You were a coward, a fuck up, and a failure in life._

_That said, regrettably as angry as I am with you, I can't write this letter without thanking you either. Yeah, I was wondering myself what I had to thank you for, but one look outside and I have my answer._

_You see, if you hadn't been such a coward I would have never met this girl. I know I know, there have been plenty of those before, but this one is special…in fact I think I'm falling in love with her and it's real. Yeah she's got this ex boyfriend who is a mother fucking deutschebag, I just had an encounter with him today, but I think she's really worth the trouble._

_As hard as it is to forgive you, I just can't stay mad at you. Because even though I miss you like crazy fucker, I have her now. Or at least I hope to have her._

_I hate you for making me see the silver lining in all of this; you even found a way to win the upper hand from the other side. I hope you rot in hell and all, but I also hope you're happy wherever you are. Asshole!_

When Sookie looked up at me after reading this, I wasn't sure what to expect. I realized the language was pretty below par even for the people she was used to being around at that bar of hers. I didn't want to disappoint her, but it was how I felt at the time and if there was anything I wanted her to see from that book, it was that letter.

But she was being quiet, too quiet and then I began to grow worried. Watching her reaction anxiously, she finally turned to me, wrapped her arm around mine and she concluded…

"I'm glad he brought you to me too."

I smiled in relief; feeling as if the final weight had been taken from my shoulders and I stood up, opened the glass door to the fireplace and tossed the book inside.

"Eric? Are you sure?" Sookie stood up next to me watching the corners of the book begin to turn black and I nodded my head…

"Yes, I'm putting this behind me now…it's time to start a new chapter."

I looked back at her nodding my head to her in gesture and concluded…

"With you, with our baby, our family."

I thought I saw a tear form in the corner of her eyes as she smiled and then she walked away from me to my surprise. I was about to ask her where she was going when she explained…

"Ill be right back."

Moments later Sookie returned with a piece of paper in her hand. When she got closer I recognized the check instantly as the one Bill had written for her and I asked her realizing what she was about to do, still in disbelief…

"Are you sure you really want to do that? You still could get something good out of him, maybe a nice new car or better yet, donate to a charity for battered women."

I suggested, thinking about the karma of seeing Bill Fucking Compton out $20,000 for something as ironic as that, but Sookie simply shook her head and she replied…

"No, I want to be rid of this for good. Like you said, it's time to start a new chapter."

She looked back at me and before I could protest, she flicked the small piece of paper into the fire along with my notebook.

"To new beginnings!"

Sookie declared as I watched her. I knew she needed to burn that check just as badly as I needed to bury Godric. So we could get closure. It was as simple as that. We owed our child that much. The light from the fire reflected off her eyes and I stared down at the flames and I knew then that Godric was behind me now too.

"To new beginnings!"

I concluded and then watched the remains of our pasts get swallowed up in a blaze of glory.


	28. Chapter 28

**AN: **So I apologize for the delay in my chapters lately. On top of my precious laptop getting a virus, life has been hectic. Im hoping after this weekend, it simmers down a little. I wanted to let you know that, Im plowing through full force ahead though, I even have some of the next chapter written already, so dont despair. It's coming, you just have to be patient. I know, excuses excuses, lol. So I wont give any more. I just want to say, I hope you like this chapter. And as always thanks to each and every one of you for reading, and for the reviews. They keep me going. Enjoy! xo

**Chapter 28- Blood Line**

_SPOV_

The next couple weeks went by much faster than I had expected. Eric helped me get most of my stuff packed up in Bon Temps and we borrowed Gran's truck for a day to move it all over to Shreveport. Most of the furniture I brought along was for the baby's room, with the exception of my dressing table and wardrobe. My Gran said we could have any of the spare couches and chairs if we wanted as well, but Eric's place was pretty much already fully furnished. So I opted to just bring along an old rocking chair that my Gran told me was used to help Jason and I get to sleep when we were babies.

It felt strange to dust off all this old stuff, stuff I hadn't seen in years and make it new again. I couldn't explain it, but I felt like both Eric and I were going through some kind of metamorphosis. I wasn't sure what awaited us on the other side. But neither of us did. Strangely it put my mind at ease knowing Eric was just as lost as me, because it meant we were both in this together.

Living for the first time on my own away from the family I knew and loved for 28 years made me feel like a real grown up. I couldn't lie and say it was easy though. I missed them too. It was different now. My worries just didn't revolve around me or my Gran, but around my future too, and around my baby, and Eric. It was weird looking at the big picture and not so much of the little day to day stuff. It was strange planning ahead for some little creature I couldn't yet even see.

But despite all that, I really didn't feel I had earned the full badge to adulthood because it was hard sometimes. It's not that I didn't love Eric, but I felt like I was letting everything else go, making so many changes at once, and it was all falling behind me so quickly. I wanted to cherish every moment and wished I had done more when I was still living in Bon Temps. My Gran was getting older now, I knew what came next…She probably didn't have many good years left either. It made a difference when you came from a family as small as mine. Everything was changing whether I was ready for it or not.

We had Gran over for dinner the night I moved as thanks to her for allowing me to use her truck. We rented movies another night and invited Jason and Tara over and gave them the grand tour. I just didn't want to lose them. Letting go was a scary thing.

I found myself actually enjoying the drive to work each week, and popping in to say hi to Gran before I headed in to Merlottes. It was nice to see everyone again, yes even Arlene and her redneck fiancée. As many times as Arlene and I had been at odds, she had given me several tips for what to do after the baby was born. I guess she had experience with Coby and Lisa. It didn't make me feel any more prepared for what came, but it was good to know what to expect.

Aside from my attempt to not fret over the small stuff, like worrying who was going to cut my Gran's lawn and run out to get her groceries when her arthritis was acting up, things between Eric and me had only gotten better. He had been wonderful in curing my homesickness, and making me feel like I belonged with him. That this home was now our home. Eric even told me one night he would do anything I wanted. He even offered to move back to Bon Temps if I missed it enough. But I knew I had to suck it up and try to make this work for both of us.

It really meant a lot to me that he was trying to make this work too. He even gave me an Ikea catalogue to select anything that I wanted for the house and I thought it was cute that he was even willing to let me play with his precious bedroom if I wanted.

Aside from work and the time we spent with friends and family, our time together alone was just as meaningful if not more. Some nights we had stayed up for hours just talking, and others we fell asleep on the couch watching old movies. There wasn't anything bad about it; in fact if anything was wrong, I was a little worried things were going too good. I had nothing to complain about. We had gotten into a routine, if he got off early he would drop me off and pick me up from work, if I had to only work a half day and he got off early, Id meet him. In fact, earlier in the week he asked me to wait for him in his office while he handled a dispute with a couple of his waitresses. While doing so, I noticed he had framed a picture of him and me at that fair a few weeks back and it was hanging on his wall. When I spotted the copy of my sonogram framed and sitting on his desk, it melted my heart. It gave me this warm happy feeling when he did things like that. And of course the sex was incredible.

He was the man who put the stars in my night sky, I thought with a hazy smile.

I wondered if he would be wearing that black tank top again today when he got home from work. It had quickly become my new favorite accessory of his. When he slipped off his leather jacket revealing those strong arms, rock solid abs, and hard nipples it did things to me. Just thinking about that sliver of blonde soft hair that peeked out from below the black fabric revealing his lower naval that led to the golden treasure below left me hot and quaking. I bit my lip; my cheeks flush as I remembered what he did with it after the jacket had been removed. Then a familiar voice shook me out of my thoughts.

"Jesus Christ girl, if I catch you day dreamin one more time with those goddamn stars in your eyes I might just be forced to whoop your ass, seriously, it's sickening!"

Like a bucket of cold water I glanced to my right and found Tara standing there. I frowned and replied pursing my lips, unhappy that she interrupted me just before I had gotten to the good part. _Another side effect to being pregnant _I guess_._ The daydreams were getting more vivid lately and they had obvious side effects, especially when they involved Eric.

"You prefer me unhappy and miserable?" I asked her in question.

"No, but it might be nice to let your feet touch the ground every now and then, I know you're in that honeymoon phase and all but the rest of us have to work and live in the real world."

"I live in the real world." I declared defensively.

"Listen, I'm happy for you and Price Charming, don't get me wrong, but maybe you could just try to tone it down a little, when you're at work and shit, the rest of us might not have it as good."

It upset me that Tara felt this way and I shot her a glare...

"Incase you forgot, I've had my share of hardships too!"

"Spare me the water works Darlin!" She shot a resentful look in my direction and I watched her wondering where this was going. Did she want to pick a fight with me because she was sure acting like she had a bone to pick...

"Things not going very well for you in the romance department?" I asked her sardonically figuring there had to be a reason for the attitude. Don't get me wrong, Tara wrote the book on giving attitude, but she had been a bit more touchy than normal lately.

She glared at me and growled...

"Don't patronize me Stackhouse."

I took a deep breath realizing when Tara got like this it was usually because of a boy and I had a pretty good idea who that boy was. Surrendering I replied.

"I'm not trying to patronize you, I'm asking as your friend."

Tara sighed, rolled her eyes, and finally confessed glaring at me...

"I cant even get a date for this party of yours on Sunday, even Hoyt Fortenberry has a fucking date, I guess I've finally reached rock bottom."

"I take it?" I met her gaze and she shook her head replying bitterly...

"No, he's taking Dawn-That slut." She hissed.

I knew it hurt Tara to see Jason with other women, but I didn't know what to tell her. My brother was a jerk to women most of the time. Maybe the sooner Tara realized that the sooner she would get over her little crush, I thought hopefully. Trying to change the subject I asked...

"What about Sam?"

Tara rolled her eyes again and then she shook her head refusing my suggestion...

"I'm desperate, but not that desperate, I don't need to be Sam's pity date, besides we all know who he's still hung up on."

She looked me up and down and my face colored and then to prove her point further I saw Bill walk in and sit down at the bar, stealing an ever so not coy glance in my direction as Sam took his drink order.

Tara just shook her head and glared at them...

"All of them are fucking pussies, wantin what they can't have, maybe I should think about playin for the other team, things would be a hell of a lot easier."

I cast Tara an empathetic smile and put my hand on her arm but she shrugged it off and walked back towards Sam's office muttering...

"Fuck them all!"

I followed her because I knew letting things fester inside Tara never turned out well. I thought about asking Sam for her myself, but I knew that would get all kinds of awkward considering what happened the last time the word's date and Sam came together, then another thought came to me and I glanced back at Tara and proclaimed...

"Why don't I be your date?"

Tara glared at me as if I were a few bricks short.

The more I thought about it the more it didn't sound so bad and I explained...

"In fact we can make all the men green with envy when we're done, maybe I can even get Pam in on it." I replied with a smirk, admiring the idea more and more as I thought about it.

"Listen, I know I said I was thinking of playin for the other team, but I didn't mean literally, and you can bet your sweet white ass I didn't mean you."

"What's wrong with me?" I asked her defensively, but realized I was getting off the subject.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Well whatever Prince Charming is into, you can count me out."

Okay now she was pushing my buttons.

"Tara, this isn't about what Eric wants, I'm asking if you want to go to the party with me stag."

Tara met my gaze in disbelief for a moment and then she asked me after a long pause...

"You're serious?"

"Yes, I am, but I have to make an appearance as Eric's other half too, it is a party celebrating our baby together after all."

"Haven't we already done this before? Ya know when you went with Sam to make him jealous, I seem to recall that not workin out very well for you."

Lord she could be so frustrating sometimes, I thought gritting my teeth noting Tara's need to slip in any painful reminder she could wrangle into the conversation and I explained…

"I'm not trying to make Eric jealous!"

_Well maybe just a little when he sees what I'm wearing_, I thought smugly, continuing…

"Like I said, I'm with him at the party, but we could arrive with out dates…that doesn't mean we can't leave with them."

I met her gaze imagining the look on Eric's face when he saw what I was planning on wearing to this little get together because I had bought the dress two weeks ago and I couldn't help but smirk at the thought.

Tara appeared as if she was thinking it over and then she met my gaze and concluded...

"Fine. I'm in as long as I can bring my cousin."

I smirked back at her and Tara explained...

"Lafayette would kill me if he was left out of the green envy parade."

She smiled and I grinned and nodded...

"Of course he can come. In fact if he's up for it, we can make his house pre-game headquarters, I have something I want to surprise Eric with and I may need some help getting it on."

Tara raised her brow and then she replied waving her hand in the air as if to wash me away...

"All I can say is I better get some after this shindig or I'm takin it out on you Elvira!"

She smiled smugly as if to say that was a promise and I raised my brows.

Tara took out her phone and in 5 seconds flat she had reached her cousin. At least she wasn't scowling any more so I took that to mean things were better.

I grabbed my purse ready to go out to my car when I nearly ran into Bill barreling out of the Men's room.

"Uh Hi." He replied with a surprised smile and I nodded at him replying flatly…

"Hi Bill."

In truth I just wanted to get home, it had been a long day and I had hoped to collapse, preferably in Eric's arms.

"You look good." He replied politely, his eyes moving slowly over me. I wasn't quite sure if he was just being nice or he was flirting so I hesitantly answered…

"Thanks."

"How are you doing?" He asked scratching his nose awkwardly and I nodded…

"I'm doing okay…Good." I answered.

"I heard that you finally moved out of your Grandmothers place." He added and I nodded again, not sure how to reply.

I didn't think I could say…_Yeah its nice living with Eric, now I can fuck his brains out every night over and over again and no one can hear me scream._' No, that probably wouldn't have gone over well.

"I want to do what's best for my baby." I reasoned going with the latter thought.

I met Bills gaze, suddenly realizing that I just made it sound like I was moving in with Eric because he had knocked me up. Could this get any weirder? I wondered.

"And I love him." I added in attempt to protect myself from Bills advances, but as a result digging my trenches deeper. I didn't normally flaunt that kind of information, and didn't want to rub Eric and me in Bills face, but under the circumstances I thought it best that Bill didn't get the wrong idea. Eric and I had agreed to start fresh; I wasn't going back there. I was putting the past behind me, we both were.

Bill looked disheartened and nodded his head sadly and then replied softly…

"Well I hope you're happy."

He didn't give me a chance to respond before he turned and headed back towards the bar. I watched him down the two shots of whiskey that were waiting for him and he quickly waved Sam over for another.

I hated to think I had driven him to drinking but I had to look out for myself too.

Tara came back out just as I had grabbed my car keys her smile beaming and she replied…

"Cousin Lala is in…this is going to be a night we won't soon forget!"

She winked back at me and I wondered what I had just gotten myself into. But Tara was back behind the bar before I said anything, her scowl returning when she saw Bill. I cast him one last hesitant look before heading back to Shreveport.

I questioned whether or not I should say something to him, I didn't really know what we were, friends maybe? But then I wasn't sure if it was my place to judge him, Bill wasn't really the type to listen to what I had to say anyway.

By the time I got home, Bill was already a distant memory. Swollen feet from working all night, my caving bladder, and cravings of French fries and ice cream made me forget pretty much everything else. Eric called me and said he had to work late. I couldn't help but hide my disappointment, because as I was dipping a crinkle cut fry into a glass of melted strawberry ice cream, I realized I wasn't really pining for crinkle fries, or strawberry milkshakes, or even a few minutes off my feet, I was longing for the only thing that really gave me relief. I craved Eric.

I thought about waiting up for him, but by the time 1am rolled around I was out like a light. Barefoot and belly up, a parody of myself, only I didn't even have the belly yet, I knew I would soon.

I barely felt Eric's quick lips brush across my cheek as he settled into bed along side me when he finally got home. One eye open I saw the alarm clock blurrily and I was sure it read 2 something but it was a comfort to have him near me, allowing me the blessing of a peaceful nights sleep, I decided not to press it. I was too tired.

xxxxxx

_EPOV_

In the morning I woke up to traces of her, but alas the bed was now cold and empty. I had been so out of it with the last minute party plans that I just blacked out. I wanted to make this special for Sookie, it was important to me to let her know that she would be taken care of. Perhaps it was that check from Bill that really drove the message home for me. But I wanted her to know she could count on me and I would never leave her wanting. Even if the bar went under, I had other endeavors I could tap into.

Despite the pressure to get this night right, I also had Pam to deal with. If I thought I was a hard ass, she was 100 times worse. I regretted giving her any liberties with this because I should have known better with Pam—You give her an inch, she takes a mile. But I figured it would help her get her mind off Godric, Pam needed something to keep her busy since Sookie and I had gotten most of our shit together and she had nothing to fix at the moment, or so I hoped.

My hand fell on the empty spot next to me and my body yearned to touch hers. I never thought it possible to be completely co-dependant on another human being, but with Sookie, she was my crack. I regretted having to work late last night but I hoped the payoff was worth it.

I got up and noticed that she had picked up my clothes off the floor from last night most likely to do a load of laundry. It was so blissfully domestic the thought of her carrying around that old wicker basket filled with my dirty underwear brought a smile to my face and I decided right then and there that I was going to track her down and show her how much I missed her last night.

After I threw on a pair of jeans, I found my MIA girlfriend curled up on the big leather chair downstairs with a book in her hand. I crept closer and discovered it was the copy of _Dante's Inferno_, Fintan had given her. Her brows were creased intensely and she looked as if she were trying to pull apart the words with her mind. I couldn't resist leaning in and asking coyly…

"Have you made it to the circle of lust yet?"

She crinkled her brows and met my gaze with a twinkle in her eyes replying with a playful eye toss...

"Not yet."

"Well we will have to do something about that wont we?" I asked approaching her coyly about to smother her lips with my mouth when she backed away teasingly…

"Maybe…"

I readjusted to face her and I asked her in an attempt to lure her back in asking suggestively…

"Just maybe?"

She smiled and then she answered with one brow arched in question…

"Maybe first you can tell me what you were doing with this?" She slid out a brochure obscured by her hip for the Lexus GX460 SUV model and I suddenly knew where this was headed. Not to mention she must have gone through my pockets to find that.

"Were you thinking of getting another car, because these are expensive and I doubt I could even afford the insurance on something like that."

I met her gaze choosing my words carefully…

"Yes I was thinking of getting another car and I can afford it. We are going to need something practical for the child."

She sighed and shook her head sitting up straighter and then she replied sternly…

"We could get something used from Sam's little brother, he works at a used car shop, besides, my Gremlin is running just fine, and so is your Corvette."

"Your Gremlin doesn't even have air bags and my Corvette couldn't fit in a baby seat if we slid it in sideways."

"Well I'll just drive carefully then."

"I want to do this Sookie, it will be my gift to you, to the baby."

"Eric." She looked back at me, clearly conflicted about something she pulled me down to sit next to her on the chair arm and Sookie shook her head confessing softly…

"I haven't even made it past my first trimester yet…I don't know how smart it is to make these big huge investments when we don't even know what will happen… We are already having the party tomorrow, which is really early, most people don't even announce till the second or even third…I just don't want to jinx it."

Then I finally understood what was bothering her. I closed my eyes understanding her fears because they were my own. I put my arm around her shoulder and she wrapped her arms around me.

I assured her with certainty…

"Worry is like a rocking chair-it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere."

She looked back at me miffed for a moment and then her lips creased into a smile and she actually started to laugh.

"Okay now you are scaring me, not only have you begun to scope out practical family vehicles on the basis of room for car seats and air bag locations, but you are starting to sound just like Gran too, who are you and what did you do with Eric?"

I smirked back at her and shook my head in disbelief myself at the transformation, finally concluding…

"I like having a plan…I like knowing you are safe, that our baby is safe…It doesn't get more complicated then that."

Her face relaxed into a smile as her palm came up to caress my jaw. Her touch shooting an electric charge through me that reminded me of my earlier yearning and she concluded with smugness…

"You are one of a kind."

"It takes one to know one." I concluded shifting our positions so I was seated on the chair and she was straddling my lap. Enough foreplay, I thought as my fingers clenched her long blonde hair and she met my gaze with deep-hearted yearning. We hadn't touched each other since yesterday morning and I think I needed her just as badly as she needed me.

There was a long pause as we waited for the tension to break and when it finally did, I went in for the kill and kissed her heatedly with a fire that burned inside.

We started to get into it and when we finally needed to come up for air, I smoothed my hand across her neck declaring with absolute certainty...

"Yes and that is why I love you."

She smiled and nodded her head confessing before she pressed her lips to mine...

"I love you too."

I smirked feeling my heart pound rapidly against my rib cage and then she began to hurriedly pull at my pants our bodies ahead of our heads both knowing where this was going before she even finished unzipping me.

"So much for my morning coffee." I replied teasing her with a smirk and she replied after kissing my jaw...

"It's not my fault you decided to work till 2am."

I met her sparkling gaze and knew that had been the reason she was down here this morning and not in bed waiting for me and I replied smugly...

"Well I guess Ill just have to make it up to you then."

"I guess you will." She replied with a devilish smirk as she ground her hips over my aching hardness.

I yanked her top off over her head. Her hair cascaded back down around her shoulders in perfect golden ringlets and she met my gaze with a blushing desire.

My lips pressed to hers our hunger reawakened and I helped her remove her panties. My hands were everywhere, her hands were everywhere. We couldn't get enough, but I was aching. My burning desire raging as I kicked off my jeans while Sookie frantically worked on her own clothing. I reached around her back to help her with the removal of her bra when her lips crashed into mine and I felt her tight womanhood slide over my aching hunger. Shit she was so wet.

We both groaned on impact and I looked into her eyes lucidly as she slid all the way down. _Fuck she felt good_, I thought as the pink haze flushed through our bodies. I reached around to grab her ass as she used her knees to lift herself and caress my sex with her tight sheath.

She gasped and I brought one hand up to cup her jaw as she rose and fell over me and pulled her mouth to mine. When I was inside her it was as if the whole world melted away and my heart expanded in size. I breathed her in as her hands came up to cup my face. I used one hand to pull her ass up guiding her closer to me, while the other hand worked on unclasping her bra. The leather squeaked and mingled with our panting breaths as she continued to ride me and I fumbled with her bra, finally succeeding at my quest, the fabric fell unveiling two very full and aroused rose-colored peaks.

My desire increased in size as my hands came up to cup her breasts one by one. My lips trailed along her neck as she arched her back in pleasure and then I clamped down on her right peak, followed by the left. My tongue flicked the hard ridge of her sensitive nipple and then I devoured her flesh whole.

Sookie moaned quickening her pace. She cried out as I thrust into her pushing myself deeper and deeper. My body felt alive and on fire when we came together like this.

Her fingers clenched my shoulders and I knew her moment was near. I wanted to drag it out and savor it so I pulled her back down for a scorching kiss and guided her body closer to mine so our hearts met. I looked into her gaze and saw the eyes of our child. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. In that moment I and I felt total utter peace and happiness. It was deep, like this moment had been written in stone since the beginning of time

I reached down to press my palm against her navel and she gasped and then brought her hand up to my cheek. Her legs were trembling; her body balmy and I knew she was waiting for me. I kissed her once and then smoothed my hands over her silky skin, down along her smooth sides, past the swell of her breasts along her waist, to her hips and thrust up into her, lifting her body up with mine.

She cried out in pleasure again and I groaned feeling my Nirvana approach.

_SPOV_

"Sookie!" He groaned my name and I felt the insides of my body vibrate from the top of my head to the tips of my toes.

"Eric...Eric oh Eric..." I moaned as I felt another release course through my blood. But Eric was relentless. He knew exactly what I needed, what I craved. We fit perfectly like two pieces as a puzzle and I had no other option but to cling to him as he took me higher and higher on his climb towards complete orgasmic bliss.

I took his mouth to mine wanting to be connected to every part of him when it happened. My body now sweaty against his, we made friction against the cool leather chair. Finally his grip loosened on my hips, his eyes opened wide, and he looked back into my eyes with his very soul as our bodies broke through the final threshold together.

When the floodgates opened, it was quick and he let out a sharp hiss and I pulled back to watch him utterly entranced by his stare. Mere moments later I found my own body fall over that cliff with him sharing in Eric's ecstasy. I stumbled out of the realm of consciousness for just a moment as my eyes rolled back, feeling everything at once, the air, his skin, the heat, the pleasure, the aching release as our bodies drifted away on a floating cloud of bliss.

When I finally came to after the white haze left my eyes and I could see once more, Eric was staring back at me as if in amazement.

We were drenched bound together by our love, but it was deeper than that. I thought about crazy things like growing old with him. He smiled at me and I couldn't help but smile back. It was contagious. His lips connected with mine and I wrapped my arms around him once more.

He opened his mouth to speak but I cut him off by announcing...

"Okay, you aren't allowed to put on any pants today."

His smile broadened and he roared with laughter, and then I couldn't help but giggle at the ridiculousness of my words, but there was a hint of truth there. He lifted one brow and replied smugly...

"So are you saying you like having sex with me lover?"

My cheeks flushed embarrassed now and I lowered my lashes with mock anger in an attempt to get back my upper hand I admitted...

"I'm pregnant honey that just means I'm horney."

I tugged my fingers through his hair with soft aggression and showed him my teeth ordering him...

"That means you have to do whatever I tell you."

He rose his brow and smirked back at me and then nodded his head still smug which was turning me on even more, one of the drawbacks of being pregnant apparently...

"Well...I think that can be arranged, as long as you do the same."

He winked at me and I couldn't help but flip my eyes at his playfulness. I was about to counter his compromise when he smashed his lips against mine reminding me of my raging libido and I finally muttered against his mouth in surrender...

"Agreed."

There was a glimmer in his gaze and then as if a switch had been flicked on he lifted me up in his arms and we fell back on the couch. I squeezed his firm ass in my hands as his hardness parted my folds once more and we connected on a gasp.

This man was going to turn me into a bumbling pile of goo if I wasn't careful, I thought feeling the familiar waves of pleasure course through my skin once more.

"I love you." I confessed, my eyes hazy pupils dilated and he smiled and replied…

"You already said that."

_Did I?_ I couldn't recall but before I could register another thought he coiled his body around mine, whispering into my ear as his soft lips brushed my neck…

"I love you more."

His hand took mine, his palm resting over my breast and my eyelids fluttered as he cast his spell over me and then it was as if a little ringer had gone off inside my head.

I was confused, but too far gone to figure out where it was coming from and it sounded again…

"Your phone is ringing." Eric muttered against my skin and then the noise suddenly made sense, but there was no way I was getting up off this couch unless the house was burning down and I replied hazily as his lips went to work on my neck and collar bone…

"Whoever it is, Ill call them back."

He smiled smugly bringing his lips up to join mine and I kissed him with a fervency I did not know I possessed.

I opened my thighs further to caress his strong hips and he thrust inside me.

Oh Lord. I felt like passing out the pleasure was too intense and then I heard that sound again, but it was closer this time.

I moaned wanting to ignore it but to my dismay Eric stopped what he was doing and looked up.

"That's my phone."

I didn't care what it was; I just wanted him to keep going.

"Ignore it." I plead with him meeting his dark blue entrancing gaze.

I rubbed my wet thighs against his hips reminding him of what we should be concentrating on as my hand moved along the back of his neck. He hesitated for a moment, his eyes tormented, but then he finally came down to kiss me heatedly, our lips searing on contact and my body cheered in delight.

I squeezed him hard encouraging him to go on, the phone finally at rest he was back with me to my joy, sliding in slowly and that's when both phones started going off at the same time. I groaned in frustration.

Eric pulled back gasping and he met my gaze worriedly and he replied….

"What if it's your Grandmother?"

It was as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over our heads when Eric mentioned my Gran and then I began to worry as well. He got up handed me the blanket and then went to grab his phone, in the buff.

Under different circumstances I might have enjoyed the show, but now he had me concerned as well. I took the blanket and got up in search of my phone.

When I finally reached it, it was on the last ring.

"Hello?' I replied breathlessly.

"Oh Sookie, thank God I caught you, I've been trying to get a hold of you and Eric all morning. I can't find your brother anywhere, I think he went camping with Hoyt and Terry last night."

Relief flooded my veins, hearing my Gran's voice on the other end lifted the pits from my stomach, but then they were replaced by pits of guilt for not picking up the phone right away.

"I'm sorry Gran."

I didn't want to tell her what Eric and I had really been doing, but I never lied to her and I explained…

"I didn't hear my phone right away."

Trying to cut to the chase, I asked her…

"Is everything okay? Do you need me to drop by the house?"

"Oh Sookie." She sounded emotional and then I began to grow worried again.

"Gran, what's wrong?" I asked. Finally after what sounded like a muffled sob she replied…

"It's Fintan…He's in Intensive Care right now…I…we…need you two to come down to Shreveport Medical right away…I can explain when you get here."

"Gran? What happened to him?" I asked growing worried now, hating that I would have to break this news to Eric. I knew how close he was to Fintan, even if they weren't blood related.

I finally sighed giving up the attempt to persuade my Gran to tell me what was going on over the phone and concluded…

"Okay, we'll be there as soon as we can."

"Thank you Darlin, I promise to make this up to you. Gotta go Sugarplum, the nurse is looking for me. See you soon."

And just like that she was gone.

I took one look at Eric and realized he knew as well. His face looked crushed when he explained…

"That was the hospital."

"Eric, I'm so sorry." I answered in empathy wanting to be there for him as I wrapped my arms around his jean-clad waist.

I felt his arms brush my sides and finally rise to hold my arms, as he looked back at me, tormented and raw…

"It's his kidneys."

He finally confessed trying to hide the worry from his eyes and I put my hand on his cheek wanting him to look at me and assured him…

"He's in good hands…if anyone can help him the hospital will, and we will be with him soon too."

He looked down at me with those troubled eyes, and my heart reached out to him.

About 20 minutes later we were rushing into Shreveport Medical in search of Fintan. A woman at the front desk pointed us to the elevators and told us he was on the 5th floor.

I took Eric's hand as we made our way up to see him. I could tell Eric was still worried, as was I. I wasn't even sure what the kidneys did exactly, but I knew they were important, and it was bad when they shut down. I didn't want Eric to have to say goodbye to anyone else he cared about.

The elevator doors opened to the 5th floor and I cast Eric a supportive glance before we ventured down the hall in search of Fintan's room.

It wasn't hard to find because I could see my Gran standing outside his door. She had a tissue in her hand and she looked like she had been crying.

I glanced back at Eric worriedly and then I went up to her and took her hand…

"Gran?"

"How is he?' Eric asked anxiously, and my Gran nodded her head…

"They have him stabilized right now, but it doesn't look good."

Her eyes were all blotchy and she wiped away another stray tear.

I didn't see my Gran cry often. In fact I only remember two occasions when she allowed me to see her tears. When she found out my parents had died, and at my Grandfathers funeral.

"Why didn't they call me?" Eric replied in anger as he looked inside the room. The Doctor and nurse were in there with Fintan at the moment, and she shook her head and replied…

"They tried, but his home still had you listed at my house, they must have forgotten to change it. When I got the call, I tried you once, but then I got hung up in the ER trying to answer questions for him before I could give them your home number. I didn't know much about his medical history and then they were flying at him with all these tests, and we didn't know what was wrong, and I felt so helpless."

She kept shaking her head as if she doubted herself and then Eric put his hand on her shoulder and he assured her…

"It's okay, you did everything you could, he is lucky to have you here with him."

I nodded hesitantly in agreement with Eric unsure of what was going on here. I had never seen my Gran so worked up like this and it startled me. She was always the levelheaded one.

"I'm not so sure about that." She replied, her eyes flicking towards me and then the Doctor came out of the room.

"How is he doing doctor?" My Gran asked him anxiously and the Doctor stopped and paused….

"We are going to keep him here for the next few days in the Intensive Care unit he needs to be watched closely."

"They told me on the phone that his kidneys had failed? How did this happen?" Eric asked and the Doctor straightened up and explained…

"Fintan has Kidney disease. He has actually progressed to stage 5."

"Stage 5?" Eric asked in outrage.

"I just took him in for an appointment a couple weeks ago and they mentioned nothing about this, don't you think they should have detected something back then?" Eric asked clearly upset now. I took his hand once more and awaited the Doctors reply with Eric.

"The symptoms are minor at first, shortness of breath, fatigue, loss of appetite, fluid retention, the need to urinate frequently…"

Eric met his gaze angrily and he spat back…

"Sounds like we might just have a lawsuit on our hands, if the goddamn clinic can't even diagnose him correctly…they said he had high blood pressure."

"I'm sorry, I don't know what to say, but we doctors take an oath to help and heal in whatever way we can, we can not however, help those who can't help themselves. Perhaps Fintan did not mention his symptoms to his Physician."

Eric growled lowly under his breath and I could tell he was pissed. I rubbed his back with my hand, and in an attempt to get us back on track I asked him with concern…

"So what does this mean for Fintan?"

The Doctor looked at me and then to my Gran and Eric and he explained…

"The main function of the kidneys is to remove waste products and excess water from the blood. You see we need our kidneys to purify toxic substances that we ingest, they allow consumption of a variety of foods, drugs, vitamins and supplements, additives, and excess fluids without worry that toxic by-products will build up to harmful levels. When we reach stage 5 there is total or near-total loss of kidney function. There is dangerous accumulation of water, waste, and toxic substances, and most individuals in this stage of kidney disease need dialysis or transplantation to stay alive."

My Gran put her hand up to her mouth as if in pain and Eric growled…

"So when do we get him on dialysis?"

He looked down at his clipboard, hesitating for a moment but then he concluded…

"We need to get him hooked up to a dialysis machine."

"I gather from Mrs. Stackhouse that she has been with him here for the last 3 hours. If you knew what needed to be done then, why the hell didn't you do it?" Eric argued.

"We are still waiting for his insurance coverage to get back to us."

Eric growled under his breath…

"Unfuckingbeleivable. Yeah help and heal in whatever way you can, Riiiight!"

The Doctor tried to keep his cool, but I could see his annoyance with Eric and I replied before things got ugly…

"Perhaps we can get the number to his insurance company and talk to them ourselves."

"Ill pay for it out of my goddamn pocket if I have to, but I want him hooked up to one of those machines in the next hour or I promise you, Fintan Brigant will be one patient you won't soon forget." Eric demanded.

The Doctor closed up his clipboard, straightened up, met Eric's gaze sternly and he finally replied…

"Ill see what I can do."

"You do that!" Eric called after him agitated as he made his way to the nurse's station.

Fintan's nurse finally came out of his room and then she replied…

"He can see you now, but just go in one at a time, he needs to rest."

I looked back at my Gran who was still very upset and then to Eric. I figured I could console my Gran, while Eric saw his uncle and I replied softly…

"You go."

His face softened for just a moment and he leaned down to press his lips against my forehead. I closed my eyes in an attempt to absorb his pain.

When I opened them, he had gone and my Gran was standing there looking at me with intensity. I was worried she was beyond my reach but just as I was about to speak, she replied softly…

"It's nice to see you two together, you make such a beautiful couple. I'm really happy for you honey."

I smiled softly, my cheeks flush and I replied hesitantly, not expecting her to say that…

"Thanks."

I turned to her to ask her if she was okay, my mouth partially opened, but she cut me off…

"Sookie sweetheart, there's something I have to tell you…something you need to know."

I met her gaze with concern, and was about to ask what it was when they paged code blue over the PA system and several nurses hurried past us. One bumped my Gran and she spilled her coffee proclaiming…

"Oh dear."

"Here, Ill get something to wipe that up, just stay there."

She was at a loss for words, but before she could utter another syllable I took off in search of a restroom. I found the nurses station first and asked them for a paper towel. They did one better however and called the custodian up to wipe down the floor and mop it. I supposed being in a hospital; they had to keep things sterile.

When I finally returned to my Gran she was pacing. And then Eric came back out of the room, and he announced…

"He's resting now."

"How was he?" I asked anxiously taking his hand once more and he assured me…

"He was a little out of it, but he still remembered me."

I recalled that Fintan had Alzheimer's as well, so that was good that he still had his mind with him. I felt so terrible for Eric right now, so helpless.

I looked back at Gran who seemed to be even more troubled than before if that was possible and I decided I finally needed to get to the bottom of this and asked her plainly…

"Gran what is it? What did you want to tell me?"

She glanced back from me to Eric reluctantly, still hesitant to speak and then she finally came out with it…

"I don't know if Eric has told you anything about Fintan and I…but there's something you need to know."

I looked back from Eric even more confused now and I shook my head, creasing my brows I asked her…

"What?"

She put her hand over her mouth and took a seat on the chair in the hallway. With one deep breath she began…

"Your Grandfather and I were high school Sweethearts…We got married two days before he had to be shipped off. I met Fintan after your Grandfather went to war…It had been two years since Id seen him and it wasn't looking good. Our boys were being brought home left and right in caskets, and I gave up hope that Id ever see him again."

I met her gaze still puzzled as to what this had to do with Eric or me. So she used to date Fintan before my Grandfather got back. I'm sure there were worse things. But my Gran looked down at her hands and continued…

"So we started going out, Fintan and I…It started out as a harmless date, then a little peck on the cheek, and then a kiss on the lips, and before I knew it, we had started something."

I looked back at Eric wondering why he never told me this, not that it really mattered now. So she still had a crush on Fintan after all these years?

"I found out the day your Grandfather came home from the war that I was pregnant with your father."

My face fell and pits dropped in my stomach as I began to realize what she was saying.

"I was married to your Grandfather, I was legally married to him…I couldn't tell him I had fallen in love with another man, I vowed to love, honor, and cherish him until death parted us, and after his sacrifice for me, for our country…I finally decided to break things off with Fintan and tell your Grandfather the child was his."

"What?"

I asked stiffly. The voice that came out of my mouth was not my own.

"Sookie, it could happen to anyone." Eric replied trying to coax me out of my shock, but when I looked back at him all I saw was his betrayal. I yanked my hand away from his as if he had burned me and I hissed…

"You knew about this? You knew and you didn't tell me?"

"Sookie honey, it's not his fault, I'm sorry, I don't want to take this away from any memories you had of your Grandfather."

"My Grandfather? You mean the man you cheated on? How can I even call him my Grandfather any more?"

I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Eric put his hand on my shoulder trying to calm me down since I was now making a scene but I didn't want any part of it. I yanked myself away from him, lashing back with…

"Get your hands off me!"

"Sookie, stop this!" My grandmother plead but I wanted to do nothing but scream. I glared back at her and hissed lowly…

"I can't believe you would do that to him, to our family?"

The tears stung my eyes as I looked back at them both, feeling the betrayal seething painfully over me in white hot fire. The ones I thought most near and dear to me, had turned out to stab me in the back. My heart physically hurt, as if in one swoop it had been torn from my chest and I shook my head and glared at my grandmother…

"I once looked up to you and had even hoped to be like you some day, but now all I can see is a woman who betrayed her husband, her family, and her country for some stupid affair. I hope you're happy with what you have done. You made your bed, now you get to lie in it—Alone!"

And with that I took off down the hall ran into the elevator and jammed my finger on the close button before anyone could stop me.

xxxxx

**AN2**: Hehe, dont worry Sookies not going to get very far. Ducks flying arrows. ;)


	29. Chapter 29

**AN**: Yeye a new chapter. I'm sorry again for the delay. Work is so kicking my ass right now. I used to have time on my lunch hour to write this story, but for the last few weeks, I have been skipping lunch and staying late just to catch up on work, so no rest for the wicked, lol. Anyhow, I hope you like this one. It's kind of a heartstring puller, atleast IMO. Also, alot of people asked last time about clarification with the relationship between Eric and Fintan, and I have written a little snippet in the story to explain, but just to clarify, Eric and Fintan have no blood relation whatsoever. Fintan is merely a good friend of Eric's mother and a mentor to them both. Anyhow hope you enjoy. I know Sookie can be frustrating at times, but she's coming around. Growing up doesnt happen overnight though, which is what the story is about. I had originally intended for this story to be 30 chapters long, lol, but obviously we arent ready for the conclusion just yet ;), so hope you stay tuned. Thanks again to all of you who read and review. It means a lot to me. xoxo

**Chapter 29-Erase and Rewind**

_EPOV_

To say that I was upset by Sookie's little disappearing stunt was more of an understatement. I realize the news came as a shock to her, hell it was a shock to me, but as far as I was concerned, this could be the last time we ever saw Fintan.

"Ill go after her." Adele offered, but I simply shook my head knowing the woman was just as distraught as the rest of us.

"No, Ill talk to her, you stay here." I assured her putting my hand on her arm, wanting to make sure at least one person stayed here with Fintan, and then I took off down the hall, hoping to cut Sookie off before she could leave the hospital.

I took the stairs and realized I was in luck when I saw her blonde ponytail whip out the door. Gritting my teeth I knew her stubbornness was no stranger to me, but that didn't make it any less frustrating. I quickened my pace and caught up to her on the sidewalk.

"Sookie!"

I put my hand on her shoulder from behind in an attempt to stop her, hoping to talk some sense into her, and she spun around on her heels, peering at me through stormy eyes.

"If you came down here to say you're sorry, don't bother!"

I glared back at her, realizing any notion of talking sense into this crazy pregnant woman was senseless and I met her dark stare my frustration clearly visible now, answering….

"I didn't come down here to apologize."

She huffed and took a step back in amazement as if I just told her I Santa Claus was dead and she replied with that stubborn crease in her brows…

"Figures you would side with her." My gaze flashed with hers, the blood in my veins simmering and I replied lowly…

"I'm not siding with anyone."

She rolled her eyes, and she proclaimed clearly still agitated…

"You try getting the rug pulled out from under your feet and see how it feels. Everything I knew to be, everything I thought I was, turns out it was a lie. My Gran cheated on my Grandfather, I can only hope to God he never knew or she would have broken his heart, just like she broke mine."

"I'm sorry it took you by such a surprise." I admitted calmly hoping to encourage some sense in her.

She exhaled in frustration and replied with an angry glare…

"You could have prepared me."

"I didn't know Fintan was your Grandfather."

"Well you knew something." She countered.

I grabbed her wrist needing her to listen to me and not act like a fucking 12 year old.

"Sookie, FINTAN COULD DIE!" I lashed at her and her eyes flinched, but I didn't care, I needed this to sink in for her, once and for all.

"I realize Adele gave you some startling news, but I'm looking at the big picture here. If this is his last day on Earth, I'm certainly not going to spend it fighting here with you."

I saw tears in her eyes and my face fell, not intending to make her cry, but I had to stay focused now. After I lost Godric, I just didn't want to waste another minute. I took the car keys out of my pocket and handed them to her.

"Drive around for a bit, or go home, do whatever you want, but I'm going back up there."

She met my gaze with pain filled eyes. A part of me felt remorse for my harsh treatment, but the other part knew I had to look at the greater good. Sookie's wounds would heal; Fintan's however may never.

I gave her one last glance, reluctant at first, I turned her hand around in mine as my fingers curved around her palm then I let go and turned on my heel to head back inside. I only hoped Sookie would eventually see the big picture as well.

xxxxx

_SPOV_

Eric both surprised and confused me. As I turned the keys around in my palm, I looked down at them and then back at his blonde head as his 6 foot 5 frame returned inside the hospital. I knew Eric was upset over Fintan, I understood that. _But did he have to be so rigid?_ I shook my head feeling like I was being suffocated between a rock and hard place. Part of me wanted to go after Eric, but I just didn't know if I was ready to face Fintan yet. It was all so sudden. I felt so disparaged. I wanted to hit something and scream and run and tackle him all at the same time. I grew angry with my Grandmother once more wondering why she had to spring this on me now. It's not like she didn't have 28 years to tell me!

I didn't know her anymore, I thought, with nostrils flaring still angry, noting that I needed to find an outlet for this anger. I figured, maybe Eric was right, maybe I should drive around for a bit, to get some clarity and cool off.

She just pissed me off. Trying to give me advice, pretending she was all virtuous and everything, and then I find out she is this big hypocrite.

I got in Eric's car realizing agitatedly that I was going in circles, I knew I needed to get out, finally giving one last glance at the hospital, I backed the red Corvette out of it's spot and headed towards the main road.

Strangely, 30 minutes later I found myself standing at ground zero in my Gran's house. I didn't know why I had come here of all places, but that's where my feet guided me. It felt so different now, and so small now that I no longer lived here. I rounded the corner to the living room and gazed at the old pictures on the mantle. It made me sad to see my Grandfather, so happy, so carefree, and so blissfully ignorant.

My feet took me towards the bookshelf where the old photo albums were stored. The top ones had been dusted off because Eric and I were looking at them recently, but the ones below were older. From back before Jason and I were even born, when my parents were children.

I pulled one out and sat down on the couch to look at it. I flipped through the pages one by one seeing the joy in my Grandfathers eyes as he tossed a football to my father and posed with their matching daily catch at the lake. Then there was one with him wrapping his arm around my Aunt Linda at her high school graduation. How could he not have known? I wondered, wiping a tear from my eyes.

I turned the page to a picture with my Granddad, my Gran, my dad and my aunt. They looked like one big happy family. They couldn't have known, I thought. How could they be that happy if they knew it was all a lie? No that burden was left for me to bear now. I almost envied them for not knowing. They could still keep the illusion alive, but for me, the truth burned it all to the ground.

I heard the porch door open and felt a breeze of fresh air blow softly through the house, but I couldn't see whom it was. I wondered if my Gran had come home for something. I stiffened up; apprehensive to see her just yet, but then I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Jason standing there.

"Hey Sook" Jason replied casually once he spotted me and I nodded to him in greeting…

"Hi Jason."

He looked at me oddly and he asked me as he headed into the kitchen making a beeline for the food…

"Hey, you know what this Gran thing is all about, I got a call from her, but couldn't make any sense of it."

Jason asked from the other room. I was reluctant to tell him anything, but I figured her deserved to hear the truth too. So I set down the photo album followed him into the kitchen and offered…

"Jason, I think you better sit down."

"What? Why? She aint hurt is she?"

I sighed and shook my head and sat down at the table, wondering how I was going to tell him this…

"Jason, just sit." I patted the chair next to me and he sat down watching me with puzzled expression.

I inhaled some air apprehensive on how to begin, when I finally decided I just had to spit it out and I replied quickly…

"Jason, Granddaddy wasn't our real Grandfather, Gran had an affair with another man and he got her pregnant."

I exhaled the small remainder of air I was holding and I looked back at him quizzically, hoping I could be there for Jason. But I certainly wasn't expecting the reaction he gave me…

"Yeah...I know."

_Wait a minute, what? Rewind, back up. _I thought in disbelief glaring at him with creased brows…

"How do you know?"

"Dad told me."

Okay things just kept getting weirder and weirder. I suddenly felt like I was living in the twilight zone.

"He told you, when?"

"One day when he took me fishin, I asked him why Granddaddy had brown eyes and none of us did and he explained to me that it was genetics. I looked out the window floored by this revelation and wondered why no one ever bothered to tell me any of this.

"You knew this and you didn't tell me?" I asked visibly upset now as my skin heated once more and Jason threw his hands out in surrender…

"I thought you knew."

I snorted. Seemed that nothing was like it appeared even when it came to my own flesh and blood

"Sook, it don't matter any way cause Granddaddy was sterile…Dad told me I was lucky I didn't get his genes passed on to me or I would be the last of our family line."

He looked at me and then as if his memory chimed in he replied gesturing to my naval…

"Well except you of course, if you get married you probably won't keep our last name, well maybe you will..."

He stammered, clearly making me uncomfortable now and tried to yank that foot from his mouth by concluding…

"It don't matter anyway now cause you have a kid of your own and you're happy."

I wondered what Jason was smoking and I asked him…

"How can you be so nonchalant about this? Gran cheated on Granddaddy, she ripped our family apart."

He met my gaze in confusion and then finally replied after some thought…

"Maybe it was because it came from Daddy, but I never saw it that way…I always thought that other guy just gave Gran what Granddaddy couldn't…Didn't matter where it came from as long as they were happy."

I frowned still questioning how my brother could be so calm about this, but I guess he had a point. He knew all along, so did our Daddy apparently, so did our Grandfather if he knew he was sterile its obvious he couldn't have gotten my Grandmother pregnant. It took a lot for me to wrap my brain around how he could have been okay with knowing about my Gran and some nameless other man. Maybe they had more time to absorb the news, but it still hurt that no one bothered to tell me. I guess if Jason could forgive maybe I could try it to? Although I wasn't so sure about that last part.

"He's at the hospital in Shreveport...Our biological Grandfather, and Gran is with him." I finally concluded studying Jason for a moment.

He glanced at me strangely with furrowed brows and he asked in dismay...

"You mean the guy's been here all along? He's still alive?"

I nodded my head explaining...

"He is Eric's uncle."

Jason squinched up his face and he replied in disgust...

"Ew you mean you're related to Eric? Sook that's gross!"

I knew what he was thinking and I quickly put my hand out to stop him...

"Ew, no not that kind of Uncle, Eric calls him that as a nickname. Fintan, that's his name was a good friend of Eric's mother, he was her professor and mentor at Oxford and he knew Eric through her and had been a part of Eric's upbringing because they were friends. I think he moved back here to Louisiana some time before Eric's mother died, and then Eric followed to take care of him when Fintan's health began to fade."

Jason gazed back at me perplexed and I nodded...

"I know, sounds like something right out of a soap opera doesn't it?"

Jason nodded his head.

I had a thought, apprehensive about it at first I studied Jason for a moment and then I asked him still hesitant...

"Do you want to go with me to meet him?"

Jason furrowed his brow and as he bit into a piece of cornbread, he looked at me and asked...

"I don't know, wouldn't that be kinda awkward?"

I couldn't help but crack a small smile. Leave it to Jason to put it there, and I replied in an attempt to rein my self back in.

"That would be putting it mildly."

I sighed and explained the rawness returning when I remembered why Fintan was really in the hospital...

"He could be dying...His kidneys are failing and he needs to have a blood transfusion...if his body rejects the blood or anything else happens, this could be your last chance."

Jason appeared as if he was contemplating my suggestion and then he replied...

"Yeah...yeah I guess I could see him, lemme just get my stuff."

I glanced back at Jason and nodded in confirmation of his reply suddenly feeling terrible for my reaction to this news at the hospital and how I spoke to Eric, and my Gran. _Oh God. I was horrible to them! _I knew Eric would forgive me, Lord knows what I put him through since I found out, and then some but I wasn't sure if I could ever face my Gran again. I mean yes she was unfaithful to my Grandfather, but it wasn't really that different from what happened to Bill and me. Only instead of doing the selfless thing, like she had, I chose Eric.

I was selfish because I chose my heart.

My eyes began to tear up when everything hit me at once. Jason returned with his keys...

"Okay, got everything, I was thinkin since I got all this paint, I could put up a fresh coat over at..."

But before it all came out from under the surface I dove into the bathroom.

xxxxx

Forty minutes later we were standing in Shreveport Medical. I felt this looming anxiety wash over me as Jason and I made our way off the elevators. Jason unknowingly kept my mind occupied in the car while telling me about his escapades with Dawn and how he found out she had been two timing him, but once the ignition turned off and we got out of the car those pits came back. I took a deep breath and we turned the corner towards the main desk of the ICU.

I still wasn't feeling any better about this since we had gotten out of the car and questioned if I would need to find another bathroom before we went to see Fintan. I wondered if they had any toothpaste down in the gift shop because I was feeling that nausea again like before, but I was pretty sure it had to do with my nerves this time, not my morning sickness.

We passed the Nurses stand and stopped for 2 technicians who were rolling out an empty gurney, well I nearly got run over by them but Jason put his arm out to my surprise in my defense. They were halfway down the hall by the time I got my bearings back. When I finally did, I saw Eric standing there, like some rare beautiful creature out after dusk, looking at me with a baffled expression on his face, while holding a cup of coffee in his huge hand. My heart flip-flopped and I felt relief after seeing him knowing I needed to summon up the courage to apologize. I put my hand on Jason's arm and I explained...

"Give me a minute Jason."

Jason saw Eric as well and waved to Eric. Eric finally broke his stance nodded his head in gesture of greeting to Jason and I hoped this was a good sign. If I couldn't get Eric to forgive me this was all a wash.

"Hi." I replied softly approaching him wanting to smother him with kisses and wrap my arms around him, even though I knew he had to still be furious with me.

"Hey." He answered, and I asked in concern for Eric and Fintan...

"How is he?"

Eric looked tired and I could tell the afternoon had been long and taxing on him. I felt bad again for abandoning him like I had, because I remember the first week Eric was with us after Bill had been in that accident he went to the hospital for me.

"His blood pressure has been stabilized. The next 24 hours are critical, but if he makes it out, he could be moved off this floor."

His voice was filled with melancholy and it actually physically hurt me not to be able to touch him. If it wasn't for that damn coffee cup in his hand I could so I took the cup from him carefully. Eric stared at me in confusion but I simply set the cup down on a table to the side. I looked up into that intense blue stare and with one shaky breath before I lost it; I threw my arms around him and buried my face into his chest...

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry Eric...I didn't mean to treat you badly before or leave you here to deal with this all by yourself...I don't know what's wrong with me sometimes...I'm such a terrible girlfriend...I don't deserve you..."

My tears bled through his shirt because I felt ashamed of myself and I closed my eyes tight hoping he could find the mercy within.

To my relief I felt his arms clench around my shaking body and he pressed his cheek to the top of my head enveloping my body in his safe nook that fit me perfectly. Finally after a long moment he replied...

"It's okay...I'm glad you're here now...I want you here."

I clenched him tighter never wanting to let go and his palm found its way to my cheek prying my face away from his chest so I could look at him with my blotchy eyes and Eric nodded his head...

"And you are right...You being my girlfriend is terrible for me."

I pursed my lips bitterly because I knew he was speaking the truth and I nodded in reluctant agreement knowing I needed to face up to the fact, but he pulled me back to look at him...

"It's terrible because you are something infinitely more to me than just my girlfriend."

I smiled in relief and my heart fluttered all over again. For a moment I saw something flicker behind Eric's eyes. Something more, something that made my pulse rate pick up and ears pound.

"You are so smooth aren't you?" I added with a shaky voice.

"Don't worry, I only use that line on girls I've knocked up." He added with a smirk in an attempt to lighten the mood.

I smiled apprehensively still able to see past his humor behind his gaze to that deep soulful place only I could see. I felt that something greater was building between us something I wasn't quite sure I was ready for yet. I blinked and then he blinked and smiled. Okay, yes I was seriously crushing on Eric right now. Before I could figure out what that something else was, my hormones took over and I caved, giving my body what I really wanted, I pushed on the soles of my feet going on my tip toes so my lips could reach his, locking our warm embrace with a passionate kiss. He caught my bottom lip with his and I moved my hands up into his hair while his hands came down to caress my back. The only thing on my mind was how much I loved him as our kiss deepened starved from an entire morning and afternoon without contact. _Eric you've turned my world up side down_, I thought feeling my knees weaken leaning more heavily into his strong embrace.

"Ah guys, hey I hate to interrupt your little reunion and all, but one, that's my sister you're feelin up in the middle of a damn hospital and two, I gotta get home soon to start paintin before I lose the daylight."

I turned around and looked back at Jason with swollen and puffy lips my face a clear shade of crimson now I glanced towards Eric and I explained reluctantly...

"I told Jason about Fintan...Well he kind of already knew...I guess I was the last to know...but...anyway...we were wondering if we could see him...Do you think they would allow us to do that?"

Eric looked back from me to Jason as if he were trying to piece together the last few hours and then he finally nodded his head and he replied...

"Yeah...I think so."

I smiled faintly; still nervous as hell about seeing Gran and Fintan, but knowing Eric could forgive me gave me hope. Jason and I looked at each other for once both of us on the same page, anxious and nervous about this, but I knew I had to make peace with it.

"We can see if he is awake." Eric proclaimed picking his coffee back up with one hand and taking my hand in the other. Jason followed us and he confessed...

"I don't even know where to start...I mean I never heard of him or anything but what if he's famous or somethin?"

"Don't worry, he's not famous unless you're from Oxford, and he is a little out of it right now, so I wouldn't tax yourself with any great rehearsed speeches or anything."

Jason nodded seemingly relieved by that and as we reached Fintans door he shoved his hands in his pockets. I wished I had pockets in the moment, but luckily Eric was still holding my one hand. I placed the other on my abdomen, which I had been known to do recently when I was thinking hard about things and then Eric went in first.

I couldn't see Fintan yet because there was a curtain around his bed but Eric replied gently poking his head inside...

"I found a couple strays in the hall, they asked if they could see you?"

"Well heavens boy, let them in, I never turn away a stray let alone two...let them in...let them in..."

Eric smirked and glanced at me holding back the curtain. I passed through it and was nearly shaken by the sight of the man lying in front of me. He was tied up to tubes and wires and his skin was so pale. My Gran was sitting next to him with her hand over his yet there was a surprised smile on her face.

"My dearest Sookie...now this is definitely a bright spot to my day." Fintan replied with a broad grin, the color coming back into his cheeks.

"Hello Fintan." I replied politely with a smile stepping aside to let Jason in...

"I brought Jason with me...I hope you don't mind, but he wanted to meet you."

There was a bright smile on Fintan's face and he actually sat up and looked at both of us in amazement...

"Be careful Finn!" My Gran proclaimed in concern as he strained his tubes, but she seemed happy to see us.

"As I live and breathe...I have acquired a visit from Bon Temps record holding quarterback as well? I feel so honored."

Jason smiled easily won over by his flattery and Fintan looked back at Adele...

"Adie, you didn't tell me we were having a reunion today?"

"I didn't know." Adele replied with a smile and Jason nodded to her...

"Hey Gran."

Jason looked back at Fintan and he nodded...

"You got a cool accent, is that British or somethin?"

Fintan actually laughed and he nodded…

"Yes dear boy…apparently as hard as I try to shake it, the old Oxford charm just wont leave."

Jason smiled awkwardly and he looked at me and proclaimed…

"So I guess we should call you Grandpa?"

Fintan scoffed and he shook his head...

"Fiddlesticks...Grandpa is for some old coot...If you want to call me anything besides Fintan, just call me Uncle...like Eric does."

"Sure yeah." Jason replied hesitantly.

Fintan glanced at Eric, then me and smiled...

"So I see you two have become something of an item."

I glanced at Eric not knowing what he might have told Fintan about us but I noticed he was looking at our hands with a twinkle in his eyes and I realized it was written plain as day wasn't it?

"Yes, I guess you could say that." I answered and Jason chided in...

"Yeah...she's got a bun in the oven too."

_Thanks Jason_, I shot him a glare wondering how many people he told already. It's not like it was a secret, but I'm sure Fintan had other things on his mind, like how he was going to make it through the night. I dropped Eric's hand feeling awkward again and bit my lip nervously because I wasn't sure how he would take it.

Fintan raised his brows as if in surprise and he looked back to Eric...

"You didn't tell me?"

Eric creased his brows and he replied...

"Yes, it's true, Sookie and I are expecting?"

His smile lit up brightly and he answered cheerfully...

"This is splendid news, absolutely splendid, so when is the big day?"

"Day? You mean when is it due?" Eric asked, but Fintan shook his head...

"No dear boy, I mean when are you two tying the not?"

I looked back at Eric feeling nervous again, because this was the second time that had been brought up today and neither by Eric nor me. All of the sudden not sure why, the idea of tying the not with Eric gave me restless butterflies and then he answered...

"We haven't really planned on it."

He looked back at me and my stomach sunk for a brief moment. Up until now I just assumed we wouldn't want to do the traditional marriage thing despite societal pressure, and I wasn't one to cave just because everyone else expected it, we would have our hands full with a baby any way, why complicate things further right?

"Don't be such an idiot boy, she loves you, you love her, you are expecting a child together, and get on that stat or you will surely regret it! Trust me when I say these windows of opportunity only come along once in a lifetime."

Fintan glanced sideways sadly towards my Gran, while Eric's eyes flashed with mine and I could tell he wasn't prepared for that conversation. In an attempt to save us and save my mind from spinning all over the place I replied sweetly moving over to the side of his bed...

"Enough about us Fintan, we came to see you...How are you feeling?"

Fintan looked at me with that twinkle and then he replied...

"Well I have to say this has been both the best and worst day of my life, the worst day because I thought that perhaps I might never have this opportunity to reunite with you all and best because it turns out, I did."

Jason smirked and added...

"Well I don't know anything about blood transfixion or anything, but I sure didn't expect you to be up and talkin like you are."

Fintan smiled taking Jason's hand he shook it and answered...

"When the spirit moves you dear boy, you move."

Jason nodded trying to think that line over and then he smiled pretending to understand. And Adele piped in...

"I am so proud of my Grandchildren...Jason for the strong, helpful, and handsome young man he has become and Sookie for being such a strong, independent, beautiful young woman...I don't know what I would do without both of them."

Gran looked back at me with a proud silence and I felt riddled with guilt once again for how I had treated her before. I knew I had snapped earlier now. I owed her an apology, a BIG one.

"We couldn't be this strong without you Gran." I answered truthfully and Jason nodded his head in agreement.

"I can see how...You have raised some fine young adults Adie...I only wish I..."

Fintan looked down at his lap sadly, he coughed, put his iv'd hand up to his face, then he blinked away fresh tears which made my eyes instantly liquefy because I knew the kind of torment he was feeling, adding in a foggy voice filled with emotion...

"I only wish I could have seen it...The joy you bring me now, is like no other joy I have ever experienced...All of you together in one room...Adie, our breathtaking Sookie, Jason our athlete, and my strong and determined Eric, who has also found a role in this family as well...it proves to me that miracles really can happen."

He wiped away a tear and I smeared a stain on my cheek with the back of my hand as the emotion overcame me as well.

Shaking my head I replied…

"This doesn't have to be a one time thing."

Both Gran and Fintan glanced up at me surprised and I nodded looking at Jason, I explained trying to think positive…

"Maybe when you are discharged, Eric and I could have you all over for dinner…I want to try some new recipes out…"

"Oh that would be delightful Dearest, count me in." Fintan smiled brightly.

I tried not to think about what might happen if he didn't pull through, I didn't want to upset Eric more and get his hopes up either.

"Take a seat, please stay awhile." Fintan added with a smile gesturing to me and Jason with his tube tied arm. Jason took the recliner chair closest to him, next to my Gran but there weren't any other chairs in the small room.

I looked back at Eric and he patted the ledge of the windowsill next to him in a gesture for me to join him. I smiled hesitant because I could feel the static in the air, but it was a delightful mysterious quaking kind of static, the kind that made my head swim and palms sweat. Finally nodding I walked over and took the spot along side him.

"So where you been all this time?" Jason asked demonstrating his massive lack of tact.

"Jason, that's not very polite." Gran exclaimed but Fintan waved her off and began to tell us about his life. I snuck a few glances to Eric wondering just where he fit into Fintans story, and then I noticed how at home and happy my Gran seemed to be by Fintans side. I wondered why she never married him if she loved him as much as she seemed to? I peeked back at Eric again left to contemplate the reason for her choices.

xxxxxx

A few hours later after learning all about Fintan's life and he about ours, Jason was ready to go home. I forgot that we drove together and I brought him over here in the Corvette. I didn't really want to leave Eric again, but he assured me he would be fine, my Gran on the other hand looked dead tired. I was sure the day had taken its toll on her.

"Jason wait...why don't you take Gran back home?" I suggested knowing she needed rest judging by the big dark circles under her eyes. I realized I also wanted to spend some time with Eric and Fintan. Something inside me was pulling me to stay here with them; I knew it was important especially knowing there was a chance Fintan wouldn't pull through tonight. I had to take this window, as Fintan called it while I still could.

"I appreciate your concern Sugar but I'm fine, y'all go on home, I can stay here." Gran replied.

"I want to stay." Eric concluded with certainty.

"Gran its okay, we have it covered, you go home get some rest and we'll call you if anything happens during the night...You won't be any good to him when you're exhausted any way."

She sighed defeated, realizing that I wasn't budging. Not to mention, there was barely enough room for one extra person let alone three, and the nurses surely wouldn't allow it. Eric was going to need to do some smooth talking just to get us both permission. I knew Gran had taken just about all she could take on her own, not that she wouldn't have hesitated to stay here all week if that's what it took, but I could see just as plain as day that she needed her rest too. Gran finally agreed reluctantly. But just when I thought I was in the clear, I got it from Eric too, only his argument was…

"Sookie you don't have to stay, go home and sleep…you don't want to be stuck here with me and that terrible make shift recliner chair for a bed." Eric added.

I met Eric's gaze with creased brows knowing he was concerned for my comfort but I shook my head and replied truthfully…

"No…I want to stay with you."

Eric rose his brows as if he was surprised by my confession, but after a moments pause, he eventually let it go, reaching the same conclusion as my Gran.

"Okay." He answered reluctantly accepting my request.

I smiled faintly and my Gran concluded trying to lighten the mood for all of us because we were all fully aware of the gravity of Fintans condition…

"Finn if you die when I'm not here, Ill haunt you like a screaming banshee in the afterlife, so remember that."

Fintan chuckled lightly, the tiredness on his face now also blatantly apparent and he nodded his head…

"Don't worry Adie…Ill just stick to letting you haunt me in this life."

She smiled and planted a tender kiss on his cheek declaring finally as she swept up her purse and coat…

"I'm holding you to that."

"Wouldn't have it any other way." He concluded.

I smiled bitterly, saying a silent prayer to myself that he would pull through tonight to see another day tomorrow, to see Eric, to see my Gran again.

As much as I missed my own Granddaddy, it was clear as day that she still loved him and he her. I only hoped when I got that old Eric and I would still be like that with each other. I glanced back at him one more time and then I announced following my Gran and Jason out.

"Gran can I talk to you for a minute?"

Jason rolled his eyes and he replied…"Jesus Christ not again, you aint gonna make out with her too now are ya?"

"Watch your mouth boy!" Gran answered and he just gave me a warning glare. I knew Jason had long passed his window of daylight to paint his kitchen and I promised him…

"Ill make it fast."

"Ill go bring up the truck." He concluded taking Gran's keys.

Once Jason left she turned to me and asked with blue eyes full of concern…

"What is it dear?"

I looked into the room and saw Eric sit down next to Fintan flipping on his television and I glanced back at her. I felt so embarrassed so ashamed for how I had behaved earlier, I didn't know where to start so I simply replied in earnest…

"Gran I'm sorry…I should wash out my own mouth with soap for the way I talked to you earlier today, I wish I could take it all back."

Her face relaxed into a smile and she replied…

"Don't worry Dear, it's been a stressful day for all of us…I'm sorry to spring the news on you like I did…I had envisioned doing it at a family dinner or something when we could all be there for each other."

I somehow found the humor in that inside the irony of it all and I answered kidding…

"Maybe it's better that you didn't tell me around food."

Gran chuckled and she nodded her head…

"Yes perhaps that is true."

I gazed at her and she me and after a moments pause her smile straightened and she took my hand proclaiming seriously…

"None of this means I didn't ever love your Grandfather…I don't want to take away the memories you have of him…Earl Stackhouse was a good man, that's why I married him…Fintan was always more of a free spirit…I love him too, just like I loved your grandfather…but I felt a different kind of love for each of them…does that make sense?"

I met her sparkling blue gaze and wondered which one she loved more, but I suppose it was possible to love two people at the same time but in different ways. I had for a small amount of time, until I realized what real love was…

"Yes." I nodded.

"I guess so."

She smiled faintly and she replied…

"I have no regrets about how my life turned out…He gave me your father and your aunt Linda, and Jason and you, which makes me the richest woman in the world."

"You don't ever wish you would have married Fintan instead?"

She looked back at me the pain returning to her eyes and she concluded…

"Everyone wants to have their cake and eat it to…I made the best out of what I had and ended up happy…That doesn't mean there weren't day's I imagined what my life would be like with Fintan Brigant as my husband, but I'm happy with what I have."

I nodded my head, her words sinking in for me that I should be happy with what I had too. Heck, I had a man who loved me unconditionally; whom I even shared my life with, and a baby. There was a lot I had to be thankful for.

"That's good…I'm happy as long as you are happy." I concluded with a small smile and I leaned in to hug her.

"Ditto Sweetheart."

I smiled as she held me tightly and then she finally pulled away and declared…

"Speaking of which…You should have seen the way he was moping around here after you left…he looked like a poor little kicked puppy…but when you came back…well its clear as day who puts the pep in his step."

I smiled blushing a little as we both glanced into the dimly lit room and I replied softly…

"He makes me happy too."

"And you two are okay?" She asked carefully and I nodded…

"Yeah."

"Aside from my crazy hormonal outbreaks, I think we are better than okay."

Gran smiled and shook her head…

"They aren't that bad trust me…when I was pregnant with the twins…I could have been mistaken for Hitler."

I choked out a laugh and shook my head in disbelief…

"I'm sure you are exaggerating."

"Well just ask Fintan…He stuck around for part of it…I was no picnic…you are a walk in the park compared to me Sugarplum."

I smirked and then I thought I heard the faint sound of a horn honking outside and I sighed because I knew where it was coming from.

"That son of a gun is going to get a whooping from me if he doesn't get his act together."

"Want to throw in an extra whoop for me too?"

Gran smiled and I knew she had to get going so I leaned in and hugged her again, and then she proclaimed…

"Take care of our boys…they don't say it often but they need us more than they'd care to admit."

She cast one more glance towards the room and I thought I saw a hint of worry in her gaze before she flashed her smile back at me and then she was gone.

I took a deep breath and went back in to see what Eric and Fintan were doing. Apparently Eric had gone to the gift shop earlier and purchased a pack of playing cards and they were playing Crazy 8's. Eric asked me if I wanted to be dealt in and I nodded my head enthusiastically. I loved that game.

We were having such fun playing cards and telling stories that, I didn't even realize how late it had gotten. A nurse came in before they brought Fintan his dinner and announced that the cafeteria was closing and by that time I realized I hadn't eaten anything all day. I was actually in the negative considering I had gotten sick earlier at my Grans house. I realized I wasn't doing so good with this taking care of myself stuff, so by the time we went down to the cafeteria, I wanted to order everything on the menu. I settled for a big cheeseburger with extra pickles, a large salad, and a chocolate sundae instead.

When we got back upstairs, Eric had to seek out one of the nurses wanting to make sure we were welcome to stay for the night and to drill in that they had a course of action prepared for Fintan over the next couple days. I couldn't help but admire him for his control and leadership over the situation. If it was me and it was Gran in that bed, I would have been a trembling basket case. I really wasn't that far off from that point now, so the fact that Eric was keeping it all together, felt like a small miracle.

With Eric gone, I was left alone with Fintan. I helped him finish his chocolate pudding and he smiled and replied…

"You do remind me so much of your Grandmother…The likeness is remarkable."

I smiled warmly and he gently pushed my hand down, now done with his food. I couldn't get over how alert he was right now, clear as a bell in fact and I replied…

"Well it sounds like you were quite the catch too from what you told us tonight."

He smiled and nodded…

"Perhaps…I wish I could look back at my life and be happy with the choices I've made, but the truth is…your Grandmother was the one that got away and I've never really gotten over her."

"I'm sorry." I replied sadly now understanding the torment he had gone through in his lifetime and he replied…

"I feel terrible for this, for putting you through all of this, but if there is one thing I'm thankful for, it was that my condition allowed me to see her again, to see my Grandchildren…It kills me every day that I never got to know your father or your aunt…I was able to see them when they were younger, but as the years passed it got harder and harder for me to stay…"

He had tears in his eyes again, which made me misty eyed and he continued

"But I'm ready now for whatever God has planned. I only hope he can find the mercy within himself to forgive me for what I did."

"You have nothing to be ashamed of…you did a wonderful job with Eric…he looks up to you…he loves you fiercely…"

His eyes flickered with mine painfully and he nodded his head…

"I love him as if he were my own son…But he's not… Nor was his father ever there for him, or your father for you…It's a terrible cycle children without fathers…Never ending like a dark abyss…And I'm guilty as well because I was never there for my own son…I turned my back on my own children, my own blood…I don't know if God can forgive me for that."

I nodded my head trying to persuade him, as my chest grew heavy with sadness because of the grief I felt…

"If I go tonight…I cant help but think I deserve it."

I shook my head growing sad as the tears welled in my eyes and I insisted emotionally…

"You don't."

He smiled faintly and patted my hand, replying with a softened face…

"You are an angel my dear…Pay no attention to the ramblings of an old man, I'm quite crazy you know?"

Only I didn't think he was, he was making perfect sense. I felt like sobbing because I suddenly didn't want him to go and instead asked him with shaky breath…

"Are you scared?"

He took my hand and held it and shook his head…

"No child…thousands of religions and philosophies out there talk about the after life or lack there of and what awaits us…but I believe that we do go somewhere and wherever that place is…it is pure and perfect, and above all made up of the love we have experienced here on earth."

I thought that sounded like a nice place but I knew by that point he was just trying to sugar coat things for me, and I felt a hot tear roll down my cheek, scared for him even if he couldn't admit it himself and he shook his head…

"Don't cry for me my Dearest…I'm an old man…every one has to go eventually…it's all part of his master plan.

He looked tired and I began worry that this night could truly be the end for him. The clarity, Fintan finding his peace, all of us here telling him goodbye…it felt it too soon, I barely even got the chance to really know him now that I knew who he was and I squeezed his hand and confessed studying every line on his face…

"I'm glad I got to meet you…"

"If there was one good thing I ever did, it was making your father and your aunt so I could one day meet you and your brother…that is the secret of happiness…"

His voice was drifting off with a smile as he laid his head back on his pillow. I smudged another emotional tear threatening to fall, but before I could say anything he interrupted me…

"I'm growing rather tired now, if you don't mind I may turn in for the evening." He announced with perfect British manners. I felt panic when his eyes began to close realizing our window was also closing, suddenly desperate to keep the connection alive I asked softly…

"What is the secret of happiness?"

Fintan inhaled and exhaled several times and I thought he might have dozed off, just as I realized I might have lost him, he replied groggily

"Love dear child…love is the secret…"

His breathing finally evened and I knew he was asleep. I felt tightness in my chest everything hitting me at once and then a few moments later Eric came back in. I went up to him and threw my arms around him in attempt to absorb some of his strength.

"Is everything okay?" He asked me, my distress still clear and I nodded my head…

"Yes…we talked…" I looked back at him through blotchy eyes and he met my gaze with concern.

"I envy you for having the memories you have with him." I smiled faintly bringing my hand up to his cheek and suddenly he understood my worry, because he had been feeling this all day. Leaning in his arms clenched around me and he kissed my temple…

"I'm just glad I have you." He confessed in an attempt to hold in his emotion and I added…

"Me too."

He smiled faintly and we both looked back at Fintan. I knew my family numbers had dwindled rapidly in my short young life and now to meet my paternal grandfather right before I lost him too, really was like a stab in the heart. The same for Eric, who virtually had no one left and I asked him trying to hold in another round of tears wanting to stay strong for Eric…

"Do you think he will pull through?'

There was a long pause and finally I looked up into his tormented blue eyes and he shook his head with uncertainty…

"I don't know."

I felt another hot tear fall down my cheek in that moment, knowing I didn't want to lose Fintan either. The old man had wormed his way into my heart too and I clung to Eric.

xxxxxx

It was a long night, both of us taking turns resting in the chair while the other paced the floor, drank coffee, watched after hours television…neither of us getting a wink of sleep, although we tried, until finally out of exhaustion…I crawled into the chair next to Eric and nuzzled my nose into his neck as I found my nitch.

He shifted to make me more comfortable his eyes groggy and tired, my eyes red and sore from staying awake so long and I pressed my cheek to his chest. I knew at that point more than ever that Fintan's words were true…it really did all come down to love, as simple as that sounded…it was how we coped, how we found the strength to go on…in thousands of different shapes and forms, love is what brought us all together.

I closed my eyes feeling Eric drape his blanket around me enveloping us together in his cocoon of warmth and I realized how important my family was to me. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Eric and have both of us raise this baby together with as much love around us as was humanly possible. And I wanted to picture Fintan and my Gran in that future as well. Watching the baby take his or her first steps, and first day of kindergarten. I wanted them both there for that. I felt like even if he missed his chance with my father, maybe he could have the second chance he had always hoped for with our baby. I didn't want to cry anymore because I knew it was pointless to shed any more tears.

So I kissed Eric's chest and said a silent prayer wishing that Fintan would find his happiness like I had found mine. In short, I prayed for a miracle, or at the very least a sign that things would be okay for him, hoping this time we really could have our cake and eat it too. I knew it was a lot to ask and I certainly wasn't deserving of the request, but I hoped as I pressed my ear to Eric's heart that love would help us find our way.

I closed my eyes the last lingering thoughts on my mind, wishing we would all see another day together and then I finally fell to the pressure of sleep enveloped in Eric's arms.

Xxxxx

The next sound Eric and I heard as we both discovered it was daybreak, were alarms beeping and a commotion next to us around Fintans bed. I shot up my heart pounding in fear thinking this was it, this was the end, and I looked back at Eric worriedly. One of the nurses ran over to the other side of the bed and I tried to stand up shakily to watch with hand over my heart, but she exclaimed to my dismay…

"Mr. Brigant…You have to sit down…please sir, we can help you with that!"

"Don't trouble yourself dear, I feel as spry as a spring chicken…I can certainly use the facilities on my own!"

Eric already two steps ahead of me shot up and shuffled past them in an attempt to talk rationally with him as he was yanking off one tube after another…

"Fintan, you can't pull these out right now, they are keeping you healthy…"

He scoffed and shook his head…

"I'm healthy as a horse."

"At least let them get you a wheel chair!" Eric insisted and Fintan looked over at the nurse in question.

"Very well if you insist…but I don't want this to become a regular thing."

"Fine…" Eric reasoned with him running his hand through his hair clearly stressed and still a little groggy.

The parade of nurses got his tubes fixed and situated in his new wheel chair and Fintan replied with a smirk finally admiring the view as they wheeled him into the bathroom…

"If I knew I would be getting the star treatment I would have let you help me much earlier my darlings, my aren't you all such pretty young women, so what are your names?"

I actually had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn't still dreaming because I thought it was too surreal to be reality._ Fintan was seriously flirting with the nurses as they helped him get out of his bed right now?_

Yesterday he could barely move! Eric turned to look at me in disbelief, which matched mine and finally my face creased into a huge smile as I realized…

I had just gotten a wish granted.

Eric was still looking at me in question when I went up to him. He was still shaking his head in disbelief when I pulled him down for a heated kiss. It must have caught him off guard because a few moments later he pulled back breathlessly and asked me perplexed…

"What was that for?"

I just replied smiled, my eyes sparkling as they reflected in his beautiful blue gaze and I confessed happily…

"He's going to be okay!"

Eric still looked disoriented but the only thing on my mind was pulling him back down to me for another lip lock.

So I did.


	30. Chapter 30

**AN: **Hehe yes I know this title is kind of long. And yes it is in fact one word. A shout out to my Swedish pal Anna for the translation. I dare you to try to say that word three times fast, snickers. I thought since the chapter was primarily from EPOV and on account of his Birthday, we could try it in his native tongue. ;) Anyhow, this is another loong one, sorry hope you dont mind. We still have alot to get out before the conclusion. ;) Thanks again to all of you who have reviewed and have continued to read this. Im still awed by your thoughtful insight and dedication to this story. You guys are the best. Group hug! Hehe. Anyhow, I wont ramble any more. I hope you enjoy and thanks again! xoxo

**Chapter 30-****Födelsedagsöverraskningen****! (The Birthday Surprise!)**

_**EPOV**_

The rest of the morning was all a whir. Between Sookie's tackling me with her kisses, which I certainly didn't mind and Fintan practically tap dancing for the nurses, then Adele returning to us with frosted cupcakes and party hats, I just didn't know how to absorb it all.

_I had completely forgotten it was my Birthday._

"Did you forget it was your birthday Eric?' Sookie asked me laughing and I tried to play it off as a joke…

"Doesn't everyone after 30?"

"Oh please, you are just a baby Eric…Wait till you get a wrinkle or at the very least a gray hair before you start forgetting Birthdays!"

Adele proclaimed from behind a pink frosted cupcake. Then Sookie explained…

"I was going to give you your gift tonight but under the circumstances, I'm not so sure, maybe I should run home and get it…we could take a rain check on the party if you want to stay here?"

I looked back at Sookie in question wondering momentarily about what she might have gotten me but she did have a point about the party. Even though I knew Pam would kill me for bailing, I nodded in agreement, because Fintan's well being came first, but in that moment both Adele and Fintan gave their two cents…

"Fiddlesticks boy, you must go to your own Birthday party!"

"And baby announcement!" Adele chimed in, but I shook my head refusing…

"It's fine, it's just a baby party, we are skipping the birthday part, and we have 364 other days to reschedule…right now I want to stay here."

"Well I don't want you here any more." Fintan argued and Adele added…

"I will stay here with Fintan…I came prepared today." She announced showing us her big bag of magazines, books, snacks, among other things…

"Boy you really need to take the hint." Fintan concluded with a wink and Sookie smirked next to me.

"Well if you insist." I added sarcastically and both Adele and Fintan concluded in unison…

"We do."

Adele got up and started to gather our things.

"Great, then it's settled…Once we are done with our cupcakes, you two can skedaddle on home and get ready."

Adele proclaimed sternly and I wondered when this woman had gotten so pushy.

"If I didn't know better I would think you two were conspiring against us." I remarked half kidding.

"Maybe we are."

Fintan offered with a wink and then I knew I had seen it all.

xxxxx

I still wasn't sure about Fintan. I did happen to have a chance to speak to his doctor before we left and he told me that it looked like Fintan had responded well to the transfusion, which was a good sign, but there was no telling when or if another attack on his kidneys would occur and if they failed completely, he had no chance. Ultimately, we needed to find him a donor. They put him on a waiting list, but it was a long list. I knew realistically, even if he did respond well to the blood transfusions, that he most likely didn't have much time, which left an unsettled pit forming in my stomach. It was only a matter of time before the other shoe dropped.

Don't get me wrong I was thankful for what I did have. Sookie's ongoing support as well as Adele's and Fintan's regarding my relationship with Sookie and our baby was very important to me. I knew we had all been through hell and back but I wasn't sure how much more bad news I could take. I felt like my sanity was hanging on by a very thin thread and if I lost Fintan in all of this, I might wind up having a nervous breakdown myself, which both scared and worried me because I didn't want to end up like Godric. Sookie needed me right now, so did Fintan, so did that little life I hadn't even met yet. The pressure was almost more than I could bear. I considered myself to be rather level headed when it came to most things and the one to remain calm in crisis. So it definitely didn't put my mind at ease when I was continually plagued with these dark thoughts.

I had hoped to put all the bad stuff behind me before, but it seemed some things no matter how hard you tried to forget, the most painful of bad things still had a way of fighting their way back.

I sunk down on the couch and kicked off my shoes when I felt Sookie slide in behind me clenching my shoulders with her small hands, she asked me with concern…

"What's wrong?"

I didn't however want to bog Sookie down with my worries even though I knew her heart was in the right place and I shook my head answering as her hands began to knead my shoulder blades…

"Nothing…it was just a long night."

"You have so much tension in your back…" She proclaimed and I nodded…

"I guess spending the night in a recliner chair will do that."

Her bare hands moved down my back and I felt pain at first as she put on the pressure but it was followed by soothing relief as her fingers went to work on my sore muscles and she leaned over and kissed the top of my shoulder replying softly…

"So why is it I don't believe you…you have been distant ever since we left the hospital."

I closed my eyes wishing in that moment that she didn't notice these things and I smiled faintly…

"I just have a lot on my mind." I confessed finally.

"Are you still worried about Fintan?" She asked and I nodded my head. Unable to see her face, I could only take her pause as a moment to think and finally she broke the silence.

"I know this sounds silly…And I know he's not out of the woods yet, but I really believe he is going to be okay."

I closed my eyes and sighed wishing I could see things as simply as Sookie, but I couldn't put on her rose colored glasses and I shook my head…

"He made it through one night, but it will most likely happen again and if it happens when no one is around to find him…"

My voice trailed off not wanting to think about that right now, but Sookie wrapped her arms around my waist burying her head in the back of my neck, she confessed…

"I prayed for him last night…I prayed for a sign that Fintan would be all right, and I believe this morning, we got our sign."

I nodded my head in acceptance angling my neck back to glance at her still not convinced. Sookie was young and naïve and she hadn't seen much of the world and the suffering karma was capable of dealing out. I looked outside our large picture window in front of me wanting to protect her from that world.

"Perhaps we did." I admitted.

"You are about as convincing as a dog trying to tap dance." She mused sliding her hands down.

I looked back at her hopelessly, knowing I was being a pain in the ass right now.

But Sookie brought my face back to hers with her hand and she concluded…

"I want you to know that for some reason…if he doesn't pull through…I'm on your side…For whatever you decide to do…I'm with you."

I cast her a tired smile knowing she was quite serious. It meant the world to me that Sookie had promised me that much because for a time not so long ago I didn't think it was possible and I answered a simple.

"Thank you."

Grateful to her more than she would ever know.

"And incase you didn't realize it yet…It's your birthday today…"

I flipped my eyes up because I didn't want to keep being reminded of that little fact. The truth was, I didn't feel much like celebrating and she ran her fingers through my hair soothingly and professed…

"Which means I have to do anything you say."

As much as I wanted to do nothing but stew in my own melancholy, Sookie had a way of tempting me in a way I found irresistible and I tried to stay responsive.

"Anything?"

She leaned in and traced the edge of my jaw with her tongue suggestively, which sent a jolt through me, shocking me into attention.

"Anything." She whispered and I was as good as hers. The heat between us scorching and then her lips found mine. Like two magnets, I pulled her around to my front and swept her ass into my arms, pressing my aching hardness into her pelvis hungry now, my appetite re-awakened, and I replied…

"Good…we can start upstairs."

She smiled, and dove her hand into my pants-the little minx!

"How about we hit the shower first?" She suggested wickedly, exciting me even further as I hoisted her up in my arms and made a wobbly bee line for the stairs. We headed towards the upstairs bathroom that was if I could even make it upstairs before ravishing my temptress because she was doing crazy things with her mouth and hands.

_Fuck_.

I set Sookie down and glared at her with a desire in my eyes. She smiled and shivered and I struggled to unbutton her jeans. We were going to do this right here. I didn't care.

I hurriedly worked on her clasp; that was until Sookie's phone had taken its very opportune moment to go off.

I swore under my breath in Swedish thinking if I could see that phone right now Id crush it in my hands, even if I did give it to her and she moaned under me…

"Son of a Biyatch!" Sookie exclaimed just as sexually frustrated as me at the moment and I confessed, knowing I had to let Sookie answer it no matter how painful.

It could be her grandmother after all and I moved to the side to let her up.

I raked my hand through my hair willing my hard on to back the fuck down.

It turned out it was her brother. I knew there was a reason I wanted to smack that little punk, but it turned out he called to check on Fintan since Adele must not have contacted him.

Then Sookie's friend Tara called, and then Pam phoned me and I realized we weren't getting back to playtime any time soon. It was just as well, I thought bitterly, practically shouting at Pam through the phone that I didn't give a fuck what she did with the dance floor, which I had a feeling I would come to regret later.

Sookie told me earlier that she was going to get ready over at Lafayette's so I figured I should most likely get ready too so I could head over to Freyja and see what trouble Pam had stirred up before our guests arrived.

"I'm not backing down on my promise…If you want me to stay here with you I will…but we are going to shower tonight and then some when I get back, and as far as the interruptions are concerned, I figure that just means we go into overtime." She insisted.

I couldn't help but chuckle. Sookie had a way about her with her southern charm, and wanting to make my birthday special, even though I didn't care, which softened my hard exterior for a moment. I supposed that was why I loved her so much.

"No go and get ready...Ill be waiting for you." I answered glancing at her sideways.

She tidied up the room a bit and when I went to grab my shoes she returned to me brushed her fingers through my hair and confessed softly, causing delightful chills to run down my spine...

"Tell me why I don't want to leave you right now?"

"You pity me?" I mused.

She shook her head and she replied in earnest creasing her brows...

"No...it's just lately I cant stand the thought of being apart from you...Maybe its the baby."

She tried to make light of it, only I could see her eyes cloud up and she whimpered..."I just don't know what Id do without you."

With only a few mere words she melted my heart and I pulled her neck towards me with my hand, my lips meeting hers in a warm tender kiss. I never wanted it to end as her lips meshed with mine and she looked back at me longingly.

"I don't want to be apart from you either." I confessed. She smiled briefly knowing the mood in the room was getting heavy and heavy conversations weren't on the agenda for today, nor did I want them to be and I suggested...

"But the sooner we get this crazy day over with, the sooner we can end it together."

She smiled softly and remarked tauntingly, "I hope you drink your espresso today because I plan on keeping you up all night Birthday boy."

Sookie bit her lip hesitantly and I couldn't help but feel encouraged, more than I care to admit by her words.

She pulled back seductively and hurried up the stairs to grab everything she would need for tonight.

I wound up taking a shower any way because I really needed some ice cold relief at the moment.

xxxxx

_**SPOV**_

Leaving the house left me yearning for Eric even more than I had yesterday. I think after going through everything with Fintan last night and seeing my Gran so happy this morning, I just felt closer to him. I knew I was where I was supposed to be. And maybe I was just a little bit addicted to him, just maybe.

I knew Tara would rip me a new one if I talked to her about it so I made a mental note to keep my longing to a bare minimum.

Only when we got to Lafayette's, well they both knew something was up.

"You look more doe eyed than usual…What the fuck gives Sookie?" Tara asked me stepping into a very revealing, very short very sexy shimmery celery green cinched halter dress which complemented her long toned legs, adorned by very high stiletto gold pumps,.

I raised my brows surprised by her choice of garment and I asked her…

"Are you sure you don't have something you want to tell me?"

Tara flipped her eyes and explained…

"This may come as a shock to you Stackhouse, but it's been a whole month since I've gotten laid and the last time I was too drunk to remember most of it…I want to make it a sure thing tonight."

She remarked with a smirk as she attempted to try out different ways to pull up her hair in the mirror.

"I'm sure you will have no trouble…Eric has a few friends I can introduce you to as well."

Tara smiled smugly and she replied…

"If he has any, he better, you two can't have all the fun right?"

I wasn't sure if she was being sarcastic or not and I turned to my own dress on its hanger.

"It's actually been a little stressful lately."

"Oh yeah, trouble in paradise?" She asked and I rolled my eyes.

"Not with me and Eric…It turns out my Gran had an affair and the guy got her pregnant…Which means Jason and I have a new Grandfather, and now he is sitting in Shreveport Medical recovering from chronic kidney disease."

Tara looked at me her jaw now clearly dropped and she shook her head in disbelief…

"Hookah you better not have stolen my red polish!" Lafayette exclaimed coming back in from the other room in his gold satin robe, and even he could sense something was going on and he asked us…

"Okay what the hell happened, don't tell me y'all are fighting again?"

"No fuckin way?" Tara exclaimed in delayed reaction and I replied…

"Way." I answered.

And Laffey asked still confused…

"Way what?"

"Our girl Sookie just dropped her own little H bomb about Adele and some other guy who knocked her up instead of Earl and now he's sittin on his death bed in the hospital."

Lafayette snorted and looked at me and he exclaimed…

"Holy hell girl…when you drop bombshells you sure drop em."

I nodded my head reluctant and Tara asked me…

"So how come you seem so calm about all this? I think Id be hangin from the rafters if I was you."

I shrugged my shoulders and explained…

"He's Eric's mentor and I'm pretty sure Gran still loves him."

Tara raised her brows along with Lafayette and Laffey asked me…

"Well Sugar, yous handling it pretty fuckin well…If I could give you sumthin hard I would, but perhaps I could interest you in one of my special herbal remedies instead?"

I looked back at Laffey knowing whatever concoction he brewed up it most likely wasn't safe for the baby and I shook my head…

"No, I'm fine…Eric helped me through a lot of it."

Laffey smirked and he replied smugly…

"Yeah I just bet he did, your boy got any brothers or cousins I don't know about?" Laffey asked me and I couldn't help but smirk.

"Hand's off bitch, I got dibs on them first." Tara proclaimed standing her ground.

"I can ask him, that is once Tara's had first pick...She has been suffering for over a month after all." I mused, scoring a swat from Tara, but Lafayette didn't seem to mind already moving on to other things...

"Mmmhmm, damn girl, the fantasies that man gives me alone, you better hang on tight to him, for your own good."

I smirked and flipped my eyes in jest and then I told Tara about Sam confirming his RSVP and Jason's new single status, which seemed to intrigue her and Lafayette too.

Minutes later Pam arrived looking like a million bucks in her pink vintage Chanel flapper dress. The bead work was exquisite transforming her into instant super model. I was nervous now about how my dress may look because Pam and Tara were so stunning and finally I went into the bathroom to put mine on.

I made sure my panties were straight, Nude cheekies and black lace trim with little black bows. I had the matching bra, but my dress was backless and had built in support so I decided to go sans bra. And then I slipped on the red satin fabric. It felt silky and smooth and sexy as I pulled it up over my legs. Only when I reached my hips I realized however that it got a little harder to pull up. I started to panic hoping the damn thing still fit when I sucked in my gut and slipped on my shoulder straps. Phew, it came up, I thought with relief but as soon as I let out my breath I realized how little room I actually had in this dress unable to zip it up all the way. Not to mention under the drape of fabric from front wrapping around the back, I suddenly looked like a porn star with my gigantic chest. That so wasn't the look I was going for.

_Shit._

I started to freak out when I heard a knock at the door.

"_Sookie dear, I know you want to look your best but we really should get going, trust me when I say Eric has his hands full right about now and he's going to need you to sedate him very soon."_

I looked back at the door wondering what Pam meant, unfortunately brushing her words to the side because I had bigger problems to worry about I attempted to push up my girls in order to make more room below. I didn't think I had gained any weight and I wasn't gorging on food or anything so I didn't understand where this was coming from. It was too early for the bump, I thought.

"Pam, did you happen to bring along any spare dresses?" I asked in desperation, hating to let this one go because it fit me perfectly in the store and even made me look like one of those red carpet girls, which I had never felt like before and that's when she slipped in.

"Oh my god!" Pam proclaimed taking one look at me and I knew it was bad, my face falling in dread. Then she replied with a smirk…

"Honey, you are going to put him in the hospital with a dress like that."

She smirked with her perfectly pink painted lips and I shook my head explaining…

"I can't breathe…it's too tight!"

"Oh." She exclaimed with a frown and I explained…

"I bought it two weeks ago thinking it would still fit."

Pam nodded and looked back at me thoughtfully and then she proclaimed after turning the shower on full blast.

"Take it off."

"Excuse me?" I asked her confused but she just repeated herself and announced…

"Take off the dress."

I thought Pam was joking at first but her eyes were dead serious so I carefully slipped the dress down and then handed it to her covering my chest and swiping a towel from the side to cover me.

She simply smirked and replied….

"There's no way I'm letting you go in there in anything but this tonight sweetheart."

I was still confused wondering what Pam had in mind because she took my dress and hung it carefully on the opposite end of the shower away from the water. But as the room began to steam up, I realized what she was doing.

She flipped open Lafayette's medicine cabinet and rummaged through his stash of drugs, her long manicured nails landed on the jar of baby powder. I didn't quite understand but as she took it out and handed it to me.

"Put this on." She insisted.

"Baby powder?"

"Trust me." Pam promised.

I figured I didn't have much to lose at this point so I finally took it and began to apply the baby powder.

"Under the towel too. Every nook and cranny." Pam proclaimed and I looked back at her nervously wondering if this would really work. She helped to sweep my hair up in a twist that looked like it took hours to fix and then I heard the shower turn off behind me as I was finishing up my lipstick.

"Okay show time!"

Pam proclaimed shaking out my dress. I attempted to take it from her but she shook her head.

"I'll help you to make sure you don't stretch out the wrong parts. Satin is tricky." She explained.

I was hesitant because dropping my towel meant I was fully naked but Pam shook her head and she insisted…

"This is no time for modesty sweetheart. I may have experimented with the other team in college, but I have someone waiting for me along with your about to have a melt down baby daddy. Trust me, I had to turn off my phone." She explained and I looked back at her strangely wondering just what she did to him.

"Pam you're kind of starting to scare me right now."

But she only chuckled and held out my dress for me to step into. I had no other choice but to drop my towel and oblige her.

It was a little sticky at first but I realized the baby powder kept the material from clinging to my skin, and I let out a deep breath just to test the boundaries. I sighed in relief when I realized I could breathe after she zipped me up from the side and Pam insisted…

"Sit down, move around a little and then we can air dry you."

Twenty minutes later we were leaving Lafayette's place in Pam's kickin Porsche. Laffey had found a purple striped tuxedo and decided to pair it with a lavender shirt and pink tie.

I was anxious to see Eric, even a little nervous because sometime between the getting in the car and going there Pam decided to take Eric's frantic call and put it on speakerphone so we all could hear.

"_PAM I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"_

"Honey relax, were just pulling up in the parking lot now!"

_"THERE IS NO WAY I CAN RELAX WITH TWO LIVE BEASTS RUNNING AROUND IN MY UPSTAIRS LOUNGE, WHAT IF THEY ATTACK SOMEONE? YOU THINK THEY WONT HOLD ME LIABLE FOR THAT?"_

_What? There were animals running around in there?_ I looked at Pam not feeling any better by her assurance.

"Eric chill out, Ill see you in a few."

Pam proclaimed clicking off her phone leaving the rest of us to stare at her very apprehensively.

"What did you do exactly?" I asked her with caution and she just chuckled and replied while pulling into the valet stand…

"You'll see."

She winked at me and got out.

I had never been through a valet before, but the valet was the last thing on my mind as I stepped out with shaky legs. I wasn't sure what was worse, getting eaten by some huge carnivore or trying to calm Eric down, because I could tell by the tone in his voice that he was freaking out even if he didn't admit it.

When we all stepped foot inside Freyja, I think Tara's reaction summed up pretty much what everyone was thinking when she exclaimed…

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"

"You like it?" Pam asked clearly impressed with it, passing us she took my purse and gestured to the coat check for the rest, not one for modesty and she explained…

"Well he wouldn't let me get him anything for his birthday so I improvised."

I should say so, I thought with raised brows in amazement. I made a mental note to be careful what I said around Pam because as illustrated here, she could definitely take something, like scissors and run with them.

I looked across the seating area and noted the stage had extensions over the dance floor and there was smoke and mirrors and crazy lights.

Pam must have ordered the ice sculptures, which adorned the sides of the dance floor. They were all lit up by pretty blue, and purple lights making each Nordic character come to life. There were torches on each side of the stage setting off the fire and ice motif. And then I saw the dancers slinking around their selected poles in skimpy silver garments. I pursed my lips and flipped my eyes wondering why they had to have dancers too. Not sure who to thank for that Pam or Eric. And of course there was assigned seating and each table was adorned with very rustic looking stone slab candle holders. It was beautiful.

I saw a large cake off to the side, 3 chocolate tiers decorated with chocolate covered strawberries that made my mouth water. As crazy as it was, I couldn't help but admit, Pam didn't miss a beat. She had done a bang up job on everything, despite the live creatures running around wherever they might be.

"It's amazing." I replied but as soon as the words came out of my mouth I heard a roar off in the distance. It sounded like a lion and I glanced back at Pam and exclaimed…

"Good lord, what was that?"

"Great sound effects!" I heard a familiar voice from behind approach and I turned to face my anxious brother.

"Hi Jason." I remarked with a smile although I wasn't so sure those sounds were fake, but I wasn't going to tell him that. Then Sam and Arlene came in, Arlene's crazy red neck fiancé trailing behind with the kids.

"Holy cow, when y'all want to throw a party you really throw a party." Arlene mused.

Sam looked back at me and he smiled politely…

"Nice digs…I can see why I've been seeing less and less of you."

I smiled feeling momentarily guilty for that, but at the same time I didn't want to think about work right now and I replied politely…

"Thanks."

"Who's that?" Jason asked gesturing towards a long legged woman at the bar. I followed his gaze not sure who he was looking at until I realized there was only one woman seated at the bar and she was wearing a familiar skimpy green dress with gold stiletto heals. I smirked smugly and replied…

"Why don't you go find out for yourself…"

I mused noting that Tara was already flirting with the bartender. She sure moved fast. Jason definitely had his work cut out for him with Tara on the prowl, but it would be entertaining to watch, I thought wickedly wondering if Eric was starting to rub off on me.

"A drink sounds great right about now." Lafayette exclaimed and Sam added…

"Ill second that."

Pam simply smirked and she replied…

"Drink up everyone, its open bar."

Laffeys face lit up and he announced…

"Now this is my kinda party!"

They all made their way towards the bar, but Pam took my arm and proclaimed before I could join them.

"Now for Prince Charming."

"Pam, are you sure these people know what they are doing? I don't want Eric to get in trouble with the authorities or anything."

But Pam simply nodded and replied…

"Sweetie, I'm counting on you to be the rational one…It's perfectly safe, this guy does a show in Vegas every night and he hasn't had one accident yet."

"He wouldn't happen to be one of you clients would he?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Pam asked defensively, her lack of reply giving me all the answer I needed.

I met her gaze leerily. We dumped our things in Eric's office and then set off in search of him.

We saw him back stage yelling at some guy wearing a cape and I figured that had to be her patient. I didn't want Eric to have any extra stress tonight after what happened with Fintan and this definitely wasn't helping him at all.

"He's had a rough couple of days…" I explained to Pam as we approached and she nodded and answered…

"I know he has that's why I want to make this night special, once he sees you he will calm down."

I wasn't so sure about that, nervous I chose to hang back when Pam approached him with her bright smile and she exclaimed…

"I hereby order the Birthday boy to take his seat, I'm handling it from here, okay?"

Eric turned to her and he exclaimed…

"So help me Pam…This has lawsuits and liabilities written all over it, did you even think about any of that before you arranged all of this?" And Pam replied…

"I have all the permits on your desk, they have been filed with the city, and Thomas is fully liable for his animals. Should anything happen, which it wont, we have an iron clad contract with him stating that he flips the bill should he or his animals cause any damage or harm to this establishment or any person in it. And I hired two police officers to patrol until he leaves."

Eric met her gaze leerily and he closed his eyes in frustration. I could feel the stress coming off him in waves as he rubbed his temples until finally he caved and replied…

"Fine. But he better not fuck up or Ill throw the book at him myself." Eric proclaimed raising his voice just loud enough for the magician to hear him. The man shot him an angry glare and then Pam replied…

"Before you go all Perry Mason, I think there's someone here who might want to see you."

Then Pam gestured over to me with her head and I suddenly felt nervous.

When he turned to face me I felt my face flush with heat. I couldn't help in that moment but notice how sharp he looked. In his black suit and shirt, with white silk tie. He looked just like one of those mafia guys, but a very dreamy early Marlon Brando type.

He scanned me with that deep penetrating gaze and then his jaw went slack. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad, but I knew my body had suddenly come to attention when his gaze connected with mine.

xxxxx

_**EPOV**_

The moment I saw her I felt my pants stiffen. _Was that Sookie?_ I had to do a double take. She was wearing a siren red satin dress that hugged all of her curves in the right places. Black come fuck me heals. Her breasts were huge, like two perfect grapefruit sized orbs calling my name. And that hour glass figure with those full hips and tiny little bump. She smiled that enchanting smile and my eyes connected with hers spellbound. I had no idea what to say to her and would surely not tell her what I was thinking, which was somewhere along the lines of '_Lets go back to our place so I can fuck you like an animal_.' So I finally swallowed and replied feeling my heart rate increase as I approached her…

"Welcome to my Emporium of Madness."

I leaned in and kissed her lightly on the mouth. She smelled like heaven, but I didn't dare linger because I was afraid if we went any deeper I would pounce on her like a hungry lion and she replied brightly.

"It looks amazing out there. Pam really did a great job."

I looked over at Pam and flipped my eyes because I was sure she had gone to work on Sookie too and I reluctantly agreed…

"Yes she has a knack for creating chaos."

Sookie smiled and I felt that spark ignite between us. She bit her lip and I exhaled because I had caught a glimpse of her cleavage and knew my diversion had arrived.

"Come on, why don't we go out and enjoy ourselves." Sookie suggested taking my hand and I nodded my head in agreement.

"I can think of another venue in which we could enjoy ourselves even more." I muttered under my breath, and Sookie looked up at me with flushed cheeks, which only turned me on more.

That of course all blew out the window when we nearly crashed into the last person I expected to see tonight.

"Hey!" He greeted us in dismay.

"Dr. Herveaux! What are you doing here?" Sookie exclaimed just as surprised as me.

"Sookie! Eric! It's so nice to see you both, how is the baby doing?"

"Fine the last time we checked." Sookie proclaimed with a smirk and he nodded looking at me, then we heard Pam's voice from behind proclaim…

"Hello Darling."

I glanced back at Pam who had come over to place a tender kiss on his lips.

"He's with me." She announced.

So this was the guy she had been hiding away? I had to admit her choice surprised me. She usually went for the upper crust, wall street hot shot lawyer types, but this guy was as down home as they got.

"Guilty as charged." He proclaimed adding…"And please, call me Alcide."

"We're glad you could make it Alcide." Sookie offered politely and I nodded my head meeting her gaze in question, wondering if this was as serious as it looked.

"Yes, Pam has been keeping you a secret for quite some time…It's great to finally see what all the fuss was about."

My eyes flicked with Pam's mirthfully and she smiled wrapping her arm around Alcide she mused…

"Yes he definitely is a lot of fuss…But as you know when you find someone that sticks, you don't want to let them get away."

I nodded my head thinking just maybe Pam might have actually gotten serious with this guy and if it were true I was happy for her. But I also fully expected to see a pig fly right over my head right now because I had a feeling this night would be pretty unforgettable.

"If you don't mind, I need to make a couple announcements before the festivities get under way."

Pam winked at us and I realized I couldn't stay upset with her. Pam didn't do anything half ass and she wasn't going to start now. Sookie took my hand and we went into the restaurant area.

We made our way out to the dance floor to mingle and a few minutes later heard Pam's voice over the microphone.

"EXCUSE ME, LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, MAY I PLEASE HAVE YOUR ATTENTION?"

The commotion stopped and Pam smiled and raised her glass of champagne…

"I JUST WANTED TO SAY, AS YOU KNOW WE THREW THIS LITTLE THING TOGETHER TO CELEBRATE THE NEW ADDITION TO OUR HAPPY FAMILY. MY LONG TIME DEAR FRIEND AND OWNER OF THIS BAR ERIC NORTHMAN, AND HIS LOVELY…PARTNER IN CRIME" She laughed and joked putting her hand over the microphone…

"I almost said fiancée, but all in due time right?" She winked and everyone laughed at her joke, at least I thought it was a joke, my cheeks now heating up.

I looked down at Sookie, whose face matched the color of her dress and I felt my blood pressure rise once more.

"AND TO THIS REMARKABLE WOMAN SOOKIE STACKHOUSE, THE LOVE OF ERIC'S LIFE, MY GOOD FRIEND, AND THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MOTHER IN THE UNIVERSE, CONGRATULATIONS! I LOVE YOU BOTH AND KNOW YOU WILL MAKE WONDERFUL PARENTS!"

The crowd began to clap and woot I let out a breath thankful that was over. I looked down at Sookie who was smiling awkwardly and I hoped Pam was done, so I clinked my champagne glass with Sookie's sparkling cider and saluted Pam, my eyes shooting warning daggers. And then she began to speak again and I worried I might have toasted too soon…

"BUT THAT'S NOT THE ONLY REASON YOU'RE HERE. I PROMISED NO GIFTS OR SPECIAL CELEBRATIONS, BUT I DIDN'T PROMISE THAT I COULDN'T WISH ERIC A HAPPY BIRTHDAY. SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERIC! I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT THE REASON ALL THESE PEOPLE ARE HERE IS BECAUSE WE ALL LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU WILL KNOW."

Her face fell and she began to grow emotional wiping the corner of her eye and sniffling, she proclaimed as she forced a smile for everyone…

"I'M JUST HAPPY KNOWING JUSTICE BROUGHT YOU HOME WHERE YOU BELONG AND GAVE YOU THE BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT OF ALL!"

The crowed roared and whistled and I felt Sookie take my hand and squeeze it and for a brief moment I really did feel the warmth of love in the room. And I toasted to Pam, my earlier worries forgotten, she smiled at me and held up her glass concluding…

"TO SECOND CHANCES AND HAPPY ENDINGS!"

*****TO SECOND CHANCES AND HAPPY ENDINGS!*****

The crowd repeated and I couldn't help but smile and lean down to kiss my beautiful…Partner in crime.

After Pam concluded her speech they brought out the first course, spring greens, strawberry, walnut, and feta cheese salad. Then came the main course, miniature Swedish meatballs, baby carrots, dressed over a fine truffle sauce. It was clear by now what the theme was.

We finished dinner and they were just bringing out dessert when the man who held my reputation in his hands came out on stage. Apparently he was famous in Las Vegas, known as Rick Thomas, but I had never heard of him. His entrance was followed by his beautiful assistant and then he put her in a cage covered it with a velvet cloth and when he removed it, a Siberian tiger was sitting there. Then a bird flew to his arm and he placed it in a cage and placed another cloth over it. When he removed the cloth, a second tiger appeared. There were shrieks of amazement in the audience when he freed the tiger and let it roam about on the stage. My fist closed tensely and I watched him with my eagle eye as he continued his act.

"AND NOW I NEED A VOLUNTEER FROM THE AUDIENCE." I looked around the room wondering who the unlucky candidate would be when Thomas came to the edge of the stage and selected his victim…

"YOU MY DEAR WOULD BE PERFECT!"

He pointed towards our table and I smirked uncomfortably wondering who it was when I realized he was pointing right at Sookie. My face fell and I shook my head as she looked at me nervously…

"You don't have to do this."

"It's okay, I can handle it." She replied and I grit my teeth thinking now was NOT the time for bravery. Fuck if anything happened to her I would kill Thomas myself.

She stood up forcing a smile for me and then she went up as Thomas announced…

"DON'T WORRY, ILL MAKE SURE SHE COMES BACK IN ONE PIECE TO YOU."

"You better!" I challenged him and he met my gaze with a mirthful glint.

Sookie looked around her nervously and then he brought out a long table.

"WOULD YOU MIND LAYING DOWN ON THIS TABLE MY DEAR?"

Sookie's gaze flicked with mine and I watched her with concern. Thomas danced around her and the music grew in suspense and he put his hands over her abdomen.

Then something surprising happened.

Sookie's body began to lift off the table as if suspended freely in the air. I hung onto the edge of my seat nervously watching him like a hawk, ready to pounce if anything happened, but he kept raising her higher and higher.

There were gasps from the audience and amazement. He twirled his finger in the air and Sookie's body moved from a horizontal, to a vertical position. I held my breath for her, hoping she would not fall, and then to my relief he began to lower her down.

The crowd cheered and he smiled and brought one of the tigers around.

"YOU MAY PET HIM NOW IF YOU LIKE."

Sookie looked hesitant but the tiger was completely calm. I stood up nervously and then she patted the fierce creatures beautiful striped head and the tiger actually brushed its nose against her arm.

"I THINK THIS TIGER HAS FOUND A NEW LOVE!"

The crowd laughed and Thomas thanked her...

"THANK YOU DEAR YOU WERE MARVOLOUS! CAN I GET A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR THE LADY OF THE HOUSE?"

Sookie nodded graciously and she looked at me, but as she began to head to the side of the stairs as the crowd cheered for her and then I saw it happen as if in slow motion. Her heel caught in one of the tiger chains and she took a tumble down. Several women shrieked and I ran up the stairs in a heart beat to help her up.

By the time I got there, Sookie was staggering...

"I'm okay, I'm okay!" She assured everyone as Thomas had the tigers escorted off the stage.

I breathed a sigh of relief and asked her concerned...

"Are you sure."

"TIGER CHARMER, GRACEFUL, AND FEARLESS...LETS GET ANOTHER ROUND LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!"

The crowd cheered and I tried to do everything I could to keep from rolling my eyes. If anything happened to her after this, Thomas was a dead man. Of that much I was certain. We got down to the floor level and Sookie glanced behind her a few times.

"What is it?" I asked her and she confessed in embarrassment…

"My dress tore…Do you think you might have anything like tape or even a stapler to mend it?"

I nodded not thinking anything of it and we took a sharp right into the bar area.

"Happy Birthday Eric!" A woman who had a little too much to drink exclaimed.

"You were so brave out there Sookie, I don't know if I could have done that!"

"Congratulations honey!"

"This party is fuckawesome!"

Guests proclaimed as we made our way out of the party room. Sookie politely thanked them while I covered her behind. As she walked I could see the slit in her dress and it fell all the way down her apple shaped ass revealing those very tight frilly French lace panties I liked so much. I found my mouth starting to water as we reached my office door. I quickly realized we were going into that tiger pit together, the one I wanted to so desperately protect her from, and I was the tiger. Suddenly very hungry, and growing very hard, I found myself hovering over her while inhaling her intoxicating scent.

"It's locked." She turned to me in a panic and I looked at her hungrily. She gazed at my hand and I dove into my suit jacket and passed her the key. My eyes never leaving hers.

She turned the key hesitantly and I watched her open the door as a predator would watch his prey. Sookie took a deep breath and headed towards my desk as I closed the door behind us and locked it. My mind was no longer here, I was operating on pure raw animal nature so when she turned to me and asked if I had duct tape anywhere, I couldn't reply.

"Eric?" She asked again, but by that point she was as good as dead meat. She smiled apprehensive as I turned the corner of my desk and approached her. My face was as still as stone and as the magnitude of it all hit her, it quickly changed from something funny to something very serious. Her face fell as she looked up into my eyes and I knew I had her captivated. The sexual tension in the room could have been cut with a knife, by this point we just stood there and wondered who would break first. We both heard a loud roar from the audience knowing the show was still underway. I glared at her and she me and then like a thunderclap our lips crashed together.

My hand draped over her naked back and lowered into the deep crevice of her tear. She was powerless to stop me by this point, her arms entangled around me, both of us starving and hungry and that's when I went in for the kill. We both heard the tear of fabric as my hand ripped through her dress shredding it in two pieces destroying it like a shower of lava hits the ground and burns it all away.

Sookie gasped as the red fabric hit the ground and she looked up at me in momentary disbelief but I simply replied…

"I'll get you a new one."

Neither of us really caring in that moment it was all consuming raw and primal passion as her full fertile body clung to mine and I inhaled her tongue.

Suddenly my own clothes felt too heavy and I shrugged off my coat and went to work on my zipper as she loosened the tie around my neck.

"Door?" She panted as my hand dove into her panties and I muttered…

"It's locked."

She panted again, accepting my assurance with a heated kiss before I pulled her ass into my arms and set her down on my desk, knocking several items along with some paperwork onto the floor. Sookie went to work on unbuttoning my shirt and in one shrug, I had both shirt, jacket, and tie off. I was so hard and aching it was unbelievably painful to go without release and I leaned over her my hands at the waistband of her panties when she exclaimed…

"Wait…don't rip them."

It took all the self control I possessed to oblige her request as I shoved her onto her back and peeled them off. The last item separating me from my Shangri La.

She was so pink, and glistening and I felt my dick burn in agony and then I shoved it deep inside her in one full swoop, both of us crying out in ecstasy on first contact.

Fuck she felt so good. Sookie moaned and I groaned and we knocked a few more things on the floor as she enveloped her thighs around my hips and I thrust away.

"Oh God!" She cried.

Chanting me on as I went hard and heavy like a fucking bullet train at full speed.

Her voice shook and I grunted, needing to get it all out and inside her. I needed this release so bad I could taste it.

Her hard nipples scraped against my chest roughly as her fingernails dug in my back. I gripped her ass shoving myself in deeper and she called my name…

"Eric!"

"Yes, say it!" I hissed wanting her to shout it from the rooftops and she rolled her eyes back in pleasure as we climbed the eternal peak together.

"Yes…yes…"

I smothered my hot mouth over hers planting a searing kiss on her lips and I felt my body flame up like a raging fire. The heat, the passion, the raw primal energy consumed us both as one whole organism.

"Sookie!"

My forehead burned against hers as we moved our bodies together experiencing a friction that caused the kind of pleasure I was sure could not be found here on earth. I looked back at her, my balmy body pressed to hers and she nodded for me to bring her home.

We both desperately needed this release so I gave it my all as we approached that final climax together. I dragged her body back to mine and lifted her ass to ensure maximum pleasure and then I slammed my way home.

Sookie cried out and I growled, and she groaned and I gasped.

"Yes…yes…oh God…Yes ERIC!"

And that's when I felt the flood gates open and the floor fall out from under me as I spilled into her giving her all I had to give finding the ultimate LIBERATION.

She gazed at me gasping and I watched her from above, her back planted flatly on my desk and I began to continue thrusting slowly, trying to slowly wean myself off the high she gave me as we travelled back down to earth together. Her legs trembled holding onto the edge with her heels for dear life but I had to work my way down off this ethereal state. When I saw her close her eyes, and felt her clench around me and moan again, I knew we had finally found it.

The only sound in the room was our panting breaths echoing by two rapidly beating hearts and she looked up at me dazed.

"I guess you had a lot to get out." She remarked lucidly and I couldn't help but smile tiredly back at her and in jest I replied…

"You told me to drink my espresso…so I drank it."

She laughed and as I moved to help her back up she confessed…

"I think you made me numb from the waist down."

I kissed the tip of her nose and professed looking into her eyes…

"Well I think I can take care of giving that feeling back if you give me a few minutes."

Sookie giggled, swatted me away, and she replied…

"We need to pace ourselves, not to mention the party is still in full swing out there."

"And it's in full swing in here too." I added with a wicked smirk, skirting around the floor for our clothing I picked up Sookie's shredded dress and she shook her head…

"I don't even have anything to wear, I can't very well go out there in just my underwear!"

"I promise I won't complain." I professed handing them to her and she sat up in dismay. Obviously I was kidding. I found my suit jacket and helped Sookie slip into it, rubbing my hands over her arms to warm her I professed…

"I'm sure we have something here you can wear."

I yanked up my pants and went over to the supply closet to pull out one of those designer long Freyja tanks when I turned around and saw a very sexy Sookie sitting in my office chair waiting for me wearing just my suit jacket, those come fuck me heels, and looking very very inviting.

"On second thought, maybe you should just keep that on." I suggested with brow raised and she stood up to swipe the tank from me.

"I'm sure you would love that."

I smirked and mused in an attempt to ruffle her feathers..."I thought you said you would do whatever I asked today, hmm?"

Her jaw went slack, her body went rigid and all it took was a petrified look from her before I confessed...

"Relax...I might insist you walk around the house nude for the next 24 hours, however." She blinked and lowered her lashes taunting me even now as I slipped my shirt over my shoulders and she admitted...

"Perhaps that can be arranged, but I have something to give you first."

I raised my brows in question and she explained as she reached under my desk and confessed taking out a small red wrapped box...

"I know you said no gifts, but I smuggled this in, thought it might come in handy."

I gazed at her clearly intrigued and she simply smirked and held the box out to me with her hands at a loss for what could be inside this package.

"Hmm, a new suit jacket for me perhaps?" I joked and she just smirked and encouraged me as I took the package from her and sat down in my desk chair...

"Go ahead, open it."

Sookie looked as excited as a little kid on Christmas morning, but she still had me baffled, so finally after she situated herself on my knee giving me a very appealing view of her cleavage I tore off the bow and handed it to her, she looked at me and bit her lip excitedly as I ran my hand along the side to find the edge of the gift wrap and then I let it rip.

Underneath all the foil was a box with a picture of a very impressive digital camera. It was a Canon Power shot and I met her gaze in disbelief.

"You can't afford this." I proclaimed wondering where she had gotten the money for this but Sookie simply shook her head and she explained...

"I picked up a couple of extra shifts...it's fine...I wanted to do it." She pushed the paper to the side and she proclaimed that wicked smirk returning...

"Take it out and turn it on."

I met her gaze in question but she remained steadfast in her determination to remain coy.

I flipped open the box lid and took out the narrow silver camera. It was very sleek looking and light weight, and I could tell that this was the newest model because the resolution was so high and it also had video function. I turned the camera on and it sprung to life, getting a wicked idea of my own I thought I could capture this moment and I tried to divert her attentions by pointing to something on the other side of the room causing her to look up and then I flashed on Sookie's new ensemble or lack there of

She laughed, swatted my arm, and took the camera from me.

"I'm sure you could have a lot of fun with this, but there's something else too."

"Oh trust me, I'm going to have heaping piles of fun with this." I remarked casting her a devilish glint and then she clicked on another very revealing, and it possible even sexier image of her modeling in one of her string bikini's.

"I had a little fun myself." She confessed.

I smirked smugly but as she forwarded the screen to a new shot, I realized she had untied one of her clasps, and then the other, and then she was holding her naked breasts in her hands, then licking the hard pink surface, and reaching down into her panties, and crap I was getting hard again.

"You like?" She asked with a smirk and I pulled her down and whispered against her mouth...

"I Love."

"Thank you."

Before taking her lips in mine.

"But you have to get rid of them...I don't want my Gran or someone picking up the camera and finding these." Sookie concluded breathless.

I smirked smugly thinking ah the beauty of digital. Oh how I loved technology. I could never delete these, in fact I knew what my new office screen saver would be and I admitted...

"Of course, I just want to enjoy them a little first." I mused and she bit her lip.

"Very sexy...so sexy in fact, I think we need to break in the couch too, it's not fair that my desk got all the attention." I suggested.

She smiled and was just leaning in to kiss me when we both heard her phone ring again.

Groaning simultaneously, Sookie reasoned as she reached down under the desk to pull her phone out of her purse...

"It could be Fintan."

I nodded moving my arms so we could share the phone, because we both saw the caller id, it was the hospital. And Sookie answered hesitantly…

"Gran?"

"_Hi Sugar, I didn't expect to catch you, I was just goin to leave a message, is everything okay?"_

"I was just going to ask you the same thing." Sookie replied glancing at me anxiously and I placed my arm around her shoulders…

"_Yes everything's fine, Fintan is doing great, how is the party?" _

She asked and I breathed a soft sigh of relief, hoping whatever she had to say it was nothing. I leaned my head against Sookie's and decided to reignite our earlier game of foreplay. Why not get a jump start after all? I placed a few soft kisses on her cheek as she told her grandmother about the events of the evening. I watched her lashes flutter as my lips lowered to her neck, delighted with my role in this conversation.

"_It sounds like quite the night, I'm sorry I missed it."_

"That's okay Gran, you were here with us in spirit." Sookie replied her breath quaking when my palm touched the soft swell of her breast and she looked at me with glossy eyes.

"_That's very sweet of you sugar…Listen, they are closing up the cafeteria here so I'm just going to run down for a bite, but I wanted to tell you something."_

My thumb ran over the ridge of her nipple and Sookie gasped before muttering a lucid…

"Mmmhmm…"

"_Fintan and I are getting married, we want to do it here in the hospital chapel tomorrow night, and we want you and Eric to be our witnesses…Your brother too of course."_

I think in that moment we would have been able to hear the crickets chirping outside had there not been a party going on.

I sat up stiffly in my chair, as did Sookie and both of us at the same time exclaimed in general surprise and shock...

"You what?"


	31. Chapter 31

**AN**: I wanted to have this up last night but life got in the way. Anyhow, it gave me extra time to tweek because frankly I was going back on forth on what I wanted to include in this part for awhile. Let's just say this chapter is for Sookie. ;) But I hope you enjoy and thanks again to everyone for your fabulous and encouraging feedback. I love reading every word! xoxo

**Chapter 31-To Have and To Hold**

_I sat up stiffly in my chair, as did Sookie and both of us at the same time exclaimed in general surprise and shock..._

_"You what?"_

xxxxx

_SPOV_

I thought I heard an echo in the room but then I looked back at Eric and realized he was just as shocked as me.

"_Honey I know it's hard to understand because you are so young and are just starting out in life, but we don't have that many good years left, or if you want to get technical—days. Fintan and I both love each other very much and although I have no regrets with the choices I've made, I want to do this…it feels right."_

I looked back at my phone as if it had just grown a pair of horns then to Eric, who took the phone from me and he replied…

"Adele, this is Eric!"

"_Hello darling."_

" _I thought I heard you in the background."_

My eyes flickered with Eric's neither of us commenting on what had been going on behind the scenes earlier and he cut to the chase…

"I realize you both love each other and it seems like a good idea right now, but this is madness…if he dies…"

"_If he dies he will have made me a very happy woman for even entertaining this crazy notion." _

Gran replied and I met Eric's gaze noting the pain that had returned behind his eyes and I frowned.

"You are sure Gran?" I asked her to be certain and she replied with as much clarity as one could expect…

"_Baby girl, I'm sure…The only thing that would make me happier is knowing my Grandchildren, that means you too Eric…Will be there to support us."_

I wasn't sure how I felt about this, it was so sudden, but I guess if they really loved each other, how could I stand in her way? I had already pretty much given up on anything ever being normal in my world any way. Normalcy for me would happen probably at the same time they discovered there really was a man who lived on the moon.

"Okay…if you are happy then I'm happy." I answered and glanced at Eric for his response but he only muttered a lackluster…

"Yeah."

"_Good, listen I don't want to take up any more of your time, you have a party to get back to."_

I smiled faintly and my eyes flashed with Eric as I concluded…

"We'll be there Gran…Congratulations!"

"Thank you Sweetheart…Good night and sweet dreams to you both!"

She hung up and I clicked off my phone as well glancing back at Eric. He appeared as if he was deep in thought and I remarked…

"Honestly sometimes I have to wonder which of us are adults and which are the children."

Eric's gaze flashed with mine and I could tell he was stewing. Wanting him to get out whatever was bothering him I pried gently…

"You don't seem that thrilled."

"That's because I'm not." He answered bluntly and I looked back at him in question.

"Eric, they are old they probably only have a few years left if even that."

"What is the point of marrying someone if they are going to die?" He asked me and I pursed my lips not sure what to say to that.

"Why put yourself through that?"

"Why are you so against marriage?" I asked him turning the subject around to something that had been causing my primary agitation with him and his blue gaze met mine.

"I'm not."

I couldn't help but wonder if the reason Eric hadn't asked me to marry him is because he thought I wasn't good enough for him, or maybe now as the case may be he doesn't believe in marriage. I mean there had to be a reason we never really had a serious conversation about it. I felt pits sink in my stomach because even if I hadn't given it much thought up until recently, I didn't like the idea of it being taken off the table totally. And finally he remarked as his eyes flashed remorsefully with mine…

"I just don't want to see any more people get hurt."

I frowned not sure exactly what he meant by that because with Eric, his words could have a hundred different meanings and I met his gaze clearly wounded by his words. _You mean like me right?_

I pushed myself up off his lap and pulled myself together not wanting to fight right now. It was still Eric's birthday after all and I wanted to rise above my bitterness and see to it that he had a good one.

"Why don't we go back out to the party?" I suggested in an attempt to change the subject and pull myself together. I had to figure out an ensemble that would look half way presentable any way which would be no small task.

"Sookie?"

Eric stood up after me and he put his hand on my arm turning me towards him he asked me…

"We're okay right? You're okay?"

His brows were creased and he appeared as if he was struggling with something. Like he was lost and too stubborn to ask for directions. I looked at him and forced a small smile offering him a nod, I answered softly…

"Yeah."

I told myself I couldn't have my cake and eat it too. Maybe marriage just wasn't in the cards for us, I thought trying not to show my disappointment, because I didn't know where that left us.

"You're sure?"

He met my gaze with intense blue eyes and I nodded my head.

"Yes, of course."

I lied convincingly, adding a small smile for effect.

He leaned in and wrapped his huge arms around me and proclaimed softly as he held me…

"I love you."

The heat from his breath brushed against my ear, and I found myself still wanting to be as near to him as I could. I slid my hands around his waist and confessed...

"I love you too."

We just stood there for a long moment holding each other and then he angled his head down to mine for a kiss. I clung to him and kissed him back heatedly just wanting to get lost in our little bubble and not the added pressures we were putting on each other.

xxx

I insisted on wearing a men's tank under Eric's jacket, rather than the short barely there women's tank top Eric had given me-that way at least my ass was covered. The ensemble fit me like a mini skirt suit set. It turned out, I looked almost chic when I tied Eric's white silk tie around my waist as a belt and rolled up his sleeves. I guess the right shoes really did make the outfit.

We returned to the party and enjoyed ourselves for the remainder of the evening. Eric spun me around the dance floor and I got to catch up with Sam and Arlene. Then I watched Tara as she moved around the dance floor from man to man, she even found a cop to give her a spin or two, smirking when my gaze fell on my brother who was watching her with that little lost puppy expression of his. I had to give Tara credit, she knew what she was doing, far more than I ever did. Eric's waitress Ginger even pulled me aside to gush about the baby news, but honestly she was starting to scare me with the baby talk.

Then my gaze fell on Eric from across the room. He smiled which it turned out was contagious because then I smiled back at him snickering to myself because he made everyone else just melt away. Although apparently Ginger thought I was laughing when she was talking about baby colic and she replied…

"Well maybe it could be funny if they misdiagnosed but then it could be serious too. Oh that reminds me, have you ever seen those little Anne Geddes pictures, you know with the babies dressed up like flowers and vegetables? Anyway, you should totally do that with your baby, it would be adorable, or better yet..."

I didn't think I could take any more however and cut her off politely...

"Thanks Ginger, would you please excuse me?"

"Sure, it was nice talkin to you Sookie, I can't wait for the shower, I hope I'm invited, I got tons of ideas for games we could play!"

She called after me but I was already half way to Eric, who was talking with Pam and Alcide.

"Hey."

I whispered to Eric, slipping my arm around him and he smiled back at me...

"Hey yourself."

I smirked feeling warm and toasty. Apparently his jacket was very warm. It didn't hurt that I got to smell Eric on me all night either.

"Lovely ensemble Sookie, did Eric help you pick that out all by himself?" Pam mused and I glanced at her not meaning to interrupt the conversation, a little embarrassed now.

"My dress ripped when I was up on stage." I confessed.

She smirked smugly and looked back at Eric with brows raised...

"I just bet it did."

"You look lovely, in both outfits." Alcide offered with a charming smile and I felt a blush approach again...

"Thank you Alcide." I nodded my thanks to him, wanting to change the subject because I didn't like the way they were all still looking at me.

"Our appointment is still next week right?" I asked him desperate and he nodded his head...

"Yeah."

"Once you hit 10 weeks you're out of the red zone and you may even start to show a little..."

He smirked and I thought to myself…_I'm showing now_, at least there had to be a reason I couldn't get my dress on earlier.

"You are okay from that tumble earlier right? No dizziness or pain?"

Alcide asked with concern and I nodded my head as Pam and Eric hovered over me suddenly worried. I know everyone was distressed about my fall tonight but luckily for me, yet unlucky for my dress, I fell on my fat ass. I only shuddered to think how disproportioned I would look when my stomach was out past my feet.

"Yeah, I'm fine, no pain."

"That's good." Eric added relieved, then he placed his hand on the small of my back protectively.

"That's good to hear." Alcide remarked and Pam nodded her head in agreement.

"Yes you were very lucky." Pam added.

"I guess I can kiss my nice shoes and pretty clothes goodbye after that though." As illustrated tonight.

"Well you should wear what makes you comfortable, don't kill yourself to impress anyone, being pregnant gives you a license to indulge yourself." Alcide winked and I saw Eric roll his eyes.

"She can indulge herself just fine without clothing." Eric added, causing my face to flush as I realized what direction this conversation was turning.

"Don't worry darling, you just stick by me, Ill make sure you stay the most fashionably indulgent, decadently satisfied, and deliciously wrapped mother in the tri-state area."

I couldn't help but smirk. Because I knew Pam was giving Eric pretty descriptive words at the moment, which usually made him think of one thing. Yet she managed to charm Alcide as well by supporting him because moments later he slipped his arm around her. One of these days I would have to ask her how she did it. Besides, they did make a beautiful couple. Alcide was very handsome, almost as handsome as Eric, but not quite. Thinking of Eric, I could tell he was getting antsy, and confirming my earlier suspicions, he replied…

"Speaking of comfort, I'm sure Sookie's shoes are killing her, right darling?" He asked signaling me with his blue eyes that he needed an excuse to leave...

"Well, I could use a breather." I answered reluctantly and Pam smirked and replied...

"Say no more...why don't you go home, Ill take care of clean up." She leaned in and kissed my cheek and then Eric's.

"Thanks Pam." Eric answered with a tired smile and Pam returned to the stage...

"ATTENTION LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, PLEASE TAKE YOUR PLACES ON THE DANCE FLOOR FOR THE LAST SONG OF THE NIGHT! OUR GRACIOUS HOSTS NEED TO GET HOME AND MAKE EACHOTHER HAPPY AFTER ALL!"

The crowd chuckled and my face went from red to fuschia as people I had known for 10 years or more looked at me in what I could only assume was disbelief and shock. Thanks Pam! I thought bitterly glaring at her. It was always one step forward two steps back with her.

I heard Eric growl from the side and the music switched to the final song.

We said goodbye to everyone and when it was all over my feet really were swollen and aching. Eric practically had to carry me out.

I was entitled to one foot rub and then Eric insisted we reconvene our earlier activities, which I confess I didn't entirely mind. The thoughts from our earlier conversation still lingered in my mind but I knew we were okay, for now.

The next morning was quite the whirlwind. First Sam called and asked if I could come in Wednesday to pick up a shift. It was hard to say no, knowing Dawn still wasn't back from seeing her mother in Mississippi, although we both knew she was most likely just joy riding around with her new flavor of the month now that Jason was on the outs with her. Besides, I needed the money.

Then Eric delayed our start when he insisted I help him change the oil in his car after I finished the dishes. I should have known better than to trust him when I got out to the garage and found him standing there waiting for me leaning against "Red Riding Hood" in just his jeans with the fly partially undone giving me a very provocative view of what I liked to call his forbidden fruit. The man was pure devil.

It's not like I could complain though. I gave just as good as I got and found ways to surprise even Eric. When I was with him, it felt natural, like I could do whatever I wanted and he would be okay with it, so I did. Eric seemed to enjoy pushing the envelope too, like when his foot accidentally kicked open the garage door opener, making our sexual display a very public one. Thankfully once the bright light of my orgasm blinded my eyes I had the good sense to freak out and close it, but it did give me a kind of rush, I hadn't felt before, bringing me to a kind of suspended climax that lasted for 5 minutes. Yes pure devil and then some, but unfortunately for me, I was inevitably drawn to his charms.

After we peeled ourselves away from the car and general vicinity of the garage, we washed ourselves up and then we went over to Freyja. I offered to help Eric clean up. Even though Pam had done most of the work there were still a few things such as the fire torches and lighting that needed to be put away. By the time we got done it was already after 4 and we had to get home to change for the ceremony.

We stopped by a local bed and breakfast/spa to pick up our wedding gift to Gran and Fintan once Fintan was hopefully better. Then, I thought it would be nice to get Gran and Fintan a cake, since I had no time to bake one thanks to Eric. It was a lovely red velvet cake and I found a cute little bride and groom to fit on the top. And then of course I knew she needed flowers. But since we had come unprepared, I ended up just buying a variety bouquet and some ribbon and I thought I could fix it up once we arrived.

We got to the hospital and Gran was in the restroom down the hall changing according to one of the nurses. Apparently her charms had worked on the hospital staff as well because they were all very enthusiastic to see us.

Fintan was in his wheelchair looking out the window as if in deep thought when we got to his room.

"Hi Fintan."

I greeted him and he slowly turned around, his face creasing into a smile when he saw it was me…

"Well hello, there's my favorite Granddaughter! Did you come to give the bride away?" He asked with a smirk and I nodded my head leaning in to hug him…

"Yes, congratulations to you both!"

"Oh thank you my Dear, you are too kind."

Eric came in behind me having given the cake to the nurses to store until we were ready to eat.

"And Eric too? How lucky I must be…You know soon I'll be able to call you my grandson in law and then we really will be family." Fintan mused.

Eric nodded his head and answered with smile fading behind Fintan's back…

"Yeah."

I met Eric's gaze realizing we were back to the one word answers and frowned, hoping he wouldn't pull that cynical stuff on Fintan today of all days. It was a day for celebration and I wanted to see at least one couple to get their happy ending, even if it couldn't be us.

"Eric." I warned him under my breath and he glanced at me and walked over to Fintan remarking while putting his hand on the mans shoulder…

"You look sharp Fintan, you make a very handsome groom."

He glanced at me with a vindicating glance and I shook my head wishing he could be more optimistic about this.

"Thank you boy, so would you! How was your Birthday party by the way? Was your mother there too? Sofia always did throw the best parties."

He mused looking at me adding…"She makes an amazing lemon cake too! How old are you now, 18?"

Eric's gaze flicked with mine and I frowned, noting Fintan had forgotten again that Eric's mom was dead, let alone how old Eric was. And Eric answered…

"I'm 34 now and Sofia sadly was unable to make it, she sends her regrets."

I could tell he didn't want to get into it.

"Oh that is a shame." Fintan noted looking sadly down at his lap and he repeated…

"She always did make the best lemon cake…"

Eric continued clearly uncomfortable and attempted to steer Fintan in another direction changing the subject…

"It was very memorable." Eric answered glancing back at me.

"And Sookie got me this camera for my Birthday."

Eric took the camera I bought him out of his pocket and showed Fintan…

"Well wonders never cease to exist…this is what camera's look like today? It's not any bigger than a deck of cards, but I'm sure it's top of the line if Sookie bought it for you."

He answered glancing back at me with a fond smile.

Eric nodded his head and replied…

"Yes, it is quite amazing."

"Mr. Brigant, would you like to use the restroom before we bring you downstairs?" A nurse came in and smiled brightly at Eric and me.

Fintan seemed confused for a minute but then he nodded his head after a few long moments and answered…

"Yes, I suppose that would be a good idea…I don't want to have to use the little boys room during the ceremony after all." He looked at us smiling brightly and I nodded offering him some encouragement.

"Go ahead Fintan, we'll be here for you."

And the nurse took his chair and wheeled him into the restroom.

"Tell your mother Ill be right back, then we can go out to that little cafe she loves in Hardwick." Fintan replied with a smile.

I glanced at Eric briefly and turned my attention to fixing a bouquet for my Gran.

"He's not getting any better." Eric shook his head clearly displeased with Fintan's progress. I wanted to give Fintan the benefit of the doubt however, and I remarked…

"He might be a little foggy upstairs, but physically…" My voice trailed off when I saw Eric's hard as nails expression and it was clear his mind was set. I creased my brows not understanding, because Fintan looked 100 times better today than he had the first night we saw him here and we already knew about the Alzheimer's thing. Eric concluded…

"It's not his memory I'm worried about, I spoke to the head nurse…She says his kidneys are still weak…They don't want to release him from ICU."

I creased my brows feeling sudden concern for Fintan and he added under his breath…

"Just add it to the very long list that says this is all a horribly bad idea."

"Eric!" I exclaimed visibly upset by his refusal to support them after all we had been through and he looked at me and shook his head explaining…

"You have never seen him when its bad, and I doubt your grandmother has either. And I'm not even talking about his failing memory, she would have no clue where to start. When he broke his hip he needed around the clock assistance. The old man is too stubborn to ask for help himself so he tries to do things himself. Then there are the phone calls to God knows where, which upsets everyone. And the wandering. This is a full time job. I lived with him for 3 years trying to do it all myself and I was younger than I am now…This arrangement wouldn't benefit either of them in my opinion."

"Maybe it doesn't matter." I offered, trying to not let his cynicism get under my skin and Eric answered…

"Maybe it doesn't, if they are living in some doped up sugar coated fairy tale."

I snapped and replied with an angry hiss having just about enough of this…

"You really hate marriage that much? Geez Eric you of all people should know how short and valuable life can be and if they want to try to find a little happiness in this dark and crazy world, why should we stand in their way?"

"I don't hate marriage." Eric argued and I shook my head and I replied under my breath…

"I beg to differ."

He peered at me and he asked me sharply…

"What is that supposed to mean?"

I debated even talking to him about it because I knew it would just upset me more, but finally my anger won out and I turned to him after a long pause and replied…

"It means you can't be happy for your uncle after his long life of being alone, I'm knocked up with your baby and we have barely even approached the subject…I'm not saying I'm expecting anything, but we could at least talk about it."

I met his gaze with pain filled eyes and he creased his brows in confusion and asked me…

"You want to talk about getting married?"

I felt stupid by that point so I just continued to sort the flowers…

"This is crazy, just forget I brought it up."

I didn't want to talk about it any more but Eric came over to me and he replied…

"First off, I think my uncle and your grandmother clearly haven't thought out all of the pro's and con's of this new arrangement they are about to make. Fintan may die tomorrow, that would make Adele a widow two times in a row. And if he does live, she would be responsible for his well being. I would feel the same way if anyone I cared about decided to just one day up and get hitched, including our child! And, the reason I didn't bring up marriage to you is because I know the subject would bring you pain."

Now it was my turn to look confused and I asked him wondering what he was smoking…

"What?"

Then he explained…

"I remember that night Compton popped the question and got you that rock, you looked like your world was going to end…I never wanted to see that look again…it was clear you were far from ready."

I met his gaze as the memories from that night flooded my brain. I remember feeling like my world was ending, but it wasn't because of the proposal, it was because I was standing at a cross roads and I was terrified of taking the wrong path.

"Yes, that look." He noted studying the pain that washed through my eyes and I shook my head and I glanced at him and explained…

"I was scared…he sprung it on me."

"You had been going out with Bill for 6 months before I came along, we have only been together for 3."

"It didn't feel right." I added sadly staring out the window.

Eric came over to me and put his hand on my shoulder and he asked me gently…

"Sookie, are you saying you want to get married?"

I turned to him and met his gaze unable to make that jump without him because if he didn't there was no going back and I asked him hesitantly, frankly a little scared to hear his reply…

"Do you?"

Eric swallowed his deep blue eyes blazing into mine and he answered…

"Yes."

I looked at him for a long moment as his words sunk in my brain. At first I felt a muddled confusion because he had waited so long to tell me this, then disbelief because I could scarcely trust my own ears, and finally relief. My brows rose and I gazed back into his eyes that were as deep blue as the sea right now.

_So did this mean?_

I swallowed too when the realization hit me and I admitted after a few deep breaths…

"I do too."

He smirked and I smiled like a fool, feeling like I needed a slap at the moment, to snap me out of my trance.

There was a long pause as I looked into his eyes and he looked into mine and I saw my future reflected back in them.

"Well good." Eric replied letting go of his anxiety.

I smiled and reached up to kiss him once, my lips brushing his and then we heard the toilet flush and my Gran's voice as she spoke in the door way behind us.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to interrupt..."

It was safe to say our moment was squashed and I slunk out of Eric's arms and glanced back at her biting my lip.

"Hey Sook." Jason greeted me cheerfully after just rounding the corner, apparently clueless, he nodded at Eric too.

"Hey." I answered smiling when I saw my Gran standing there in her pretty floral dress and fancy Sunday hat.

"It looks like we are almost all here!" My Gran announced happily.

"Gran you look amazing!" I remarked and she smiled and she added modestly...

"I was honestly just thrilled I could still fit into this old thing, but thank you Dear."

I smiled and then offered her the bouquet of flowers and Gran fussed over it...

"Oh my, honey this is gorgeous, how did you ever know which flowers to select? It's perfect!"

I explained that it was a variety and I just bought the ribbon myself.

"So creative and resourceful." She added with a twinkle in her eye.

"I'm here, so what did I miss?" Tara replied out of breath stepping into the room and I looked back at her oddly wondering if my Gran invited her too.

"Well I think as soon as my fiancé steps out of the restroom we will be ready to go."

Tara nodded and she looked back at Eric and me and nodded in greeting...

"Hey guys."

"Hi." Eric and I both answered trying to contain our surprise to see her here too.

I noticed Tara had taken Jason's hand and I rose a brow sneaking a look over at Eric. Oh boy, I shuddered to think how those two would handle a relationship if that's what they were attempting. But I kept my thoughts to myself and smiled at them politely.

Then we heard shuffling and voices from behind the door and it opened revealing a very happy looking Fintan.

"Behold-The wedding party!" He mused.

"So are you ready to get this show on the road or are you going to make me wait another 50 years?" Adele remarked and Fintan answered...

"I wouldn't dream of upsetting you Adie, I remember the last time that happened."

"Yes, well it just goes to show we Southerners are usually ladies unless riled."

Adele smirked both of them clearly in on some inside joke and she remarked promptly...

"Alright, let's get hitched!"

xxxxx

The wedding was a beautiful short ceremony. The minister was clearly delighted to marry Gran and Fintan. Although he carried on about the sanctity of marriage and how it was so important to love and honor each other. I wondered if Eric would join in on lecturing them, but I figured I should let it go. After all, Eric just admitted he wanted to marry me. That had to count for something right?

Before the minister left however I wanted to get a shot of Gran and Fintan by the altar, only my camera was at the back of the room, so I asked Jason if he could take a picture of them.

"Yeah sure."

He picked up the camera and turned it on looking through the viewer and then he asked confused...

"How do ya work this thing anyway?"

"Just push the button on the top."

"I am! But I'm just gettin more pictures...It's like it's goin backwards!"

I started to move towards him to just do it myself when he exclaimed.

"What the hell is this? Ew!"

I had this panic in the bottom of my stomach when it clicked for me what he was most likely now looking at. I shot Eric the death glare because it was obvious by this point seeing the distaste flash across Jason's face that he didn't erase my sexy Birthday pictures from earlier, making a mental note to wring his neck when I had the chance, my pace quickened...

"Jason wait, Ill get..."

"Oh hell, no way, I think I gotta go wash my eyes out with soap!"

My face was a particularly beet shade of red at the moment and I swiped the camera from him.

"What's wrong?" My Gran asked in concern as Jason took off to the bathroom.

"Nothing that a little therapy wouldn't fix."

Eric answered smugly and I shot him another glare. He was so dead. Tara was just sitting there with a goofy expression on her face just as confused as the rest of us, but as observant as she was I'm sure it wouldn't take long before she figured it out as well.

"Okay!"

"Why don't we take some pictures?" I announced changing the subject blatantly as I scrolled through the photo queue and deleted every last sexy pose, although I was sure Eric had already uploaded them to his computer at work. Only Satan would be capable of such an act. I cast him the evil eye.

"Sounds like a plan!" Fintan replied oblivious to it all, to which I was slightly thankful for.

Eric attempted to make it up to me by confessing he ordered wonderful French catering for us, which softened my anger a fraction of an inch, but I still was furious with him because even after all of that Jason still couldn't look me directly in the eye for the remainder of the evening.

Tara tried to get it out of him, but he was too shaken up to talk about it. I wasn't sure whether or not that was a good or bad thing. Good because Jason kept his mouth closed, but then I had to ask myself. _Was I really that repulsive?_

Gran and Fintan loved the cake and the presents and before we knew it, they were closing up the cafeteria so I helped Tara clean up.

"So you and Jason huh?" I asked her after Eric ran the left over's and presents out to the car and Jason had gone with Gran to wheel Fintan back upstairs.

Tara smirked smugly and she shook her head…

"I don't know if Id go that far."

"So you aren't serious then?" I asked curiously knowing that asking Tara about anything which involved feelings was like asking a cat to like taking a bath.

"Well it's been one day, a lot can happen in a day."

"Apparently so." I admitted reluctantly, not sure I wanted to know what did exactly happen.

I knew she had been fantasizing about my brother since the second grade and I figured sooner or later Jason would probably disappoint her just like all of his other girls, but who knew, maybe this time was different…

"Well I'm thrilled for you two and whatever might blossom out of this." I concluded trying to stay optimistic.

Tara chuckled and she confessed…

"That's funny coming from you, must be your boy toy rubbing off on ya."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked her wondering if I should be offended but she just smiled smugly and answered.

"You know I wasn't the only one who noticed you two went missin last night for almost a whole hour."

I rose my brows and she snorted in laughter, realizing what she had just said caused my mouth to gape open and Tara replied…

"Oh don't get your panties all up in a bunch, I just meant he's good for you. You're even happy and shit. Before with Buttfucker you were miserable. It's nice to see is all I'm sayin."

I looked at her in shock because I found the idea of everyone knowing about what Eric and I were doing last night mortifying. Oh my god, all my family and friends? I put my face in my palm thinking earlier that it couldn't get much worse than the camera incident, but now I knew it could.

"Relax…sheesh you Stackhouse's are a tightly wound bunch arentcha?"

"Sookie done got her groove back and you should love every minute of it honey, trust me when I say you are one lucky bitch!"

I met her gaze suddenly feeling a headache coming on.

"The secret of happiness is sex, a lot of it and as often as possible, and anyone who tells you differently is lyin."

Okay, I officially had to cover my ears because I knew where this was headed. Tara was in a particularly good mood today as well.

"That's enough Tara." I replied flicking my eyes back at her in warning, not sure how much of these confessions I could take and she smirked.

"You know your brother is pretty skilled…"

"Tara!"

"I know he has a reputation, but I wasn't sure he'd live up to…"

"Okay, I'm going to bring these dishes into the kitchen while you finish cleaning up in here, see you upstairs!"

I replied sharply cutting her off and hightailing it out of that room. I had enough disturbing imagery to last me a life time. Now I knew how Jason felt seeing those pictures of me.

I felt jumpy when I returned to Fintan's room. The evening had taken its toll on him and the nurses insisted we all go home so he could rest. My Gran wouldn't budge however saying what kind of wife would she be if she didn't stay with her husband on their wedding night? One of the nurses was even kind enough to bring her a rollaway bed.

I felt sad for my Gran and on the ride home found myself wondering if what Eric said earlier was really that far off. I mean Fintan was a wonderful man, but what kind of future did they really have together, one where my Gran turned into his nurse and he was cursed with the misery of his handicap? I knew how being with another person amplified flaws sometimes. I knew Eric loved me 100% but sometimes I did wonder if I was good enough for him. Me and my less than modest upbringing, never once had I even driven more than 100 miles away from Bon Temps, and lets face it, I was a waitress. What kind of match was I for him?

"Sookie?"

I glanced back at Eric who had just stepped out of the car after me and I asked…

"Yeah?"

"I've been thinking."

_Uh oh, that was never good._ I thought knowing from personal experience, recent personal experience that too much thinking could be dangerous. Maybe he would back out on the whole wanting to get married thing, he never proposed he still could get out of it, and I couldn't say I blamed him. I knew I was being crazy again and my ears piped up to hear him, heart pounding apprehensively and I asked him…

"About what?" I asked trying to look busy and not worried while lifting out some of the left over's and setting them on the ground.

"About Fintan." He replied coming over to my side of the car and I looked to him in question.

"I was thinking maybe I should see if I could qualify as a kidney donor…incase they give out."

My heart stopped when I realized what Eric was saying. This was so much worse than my crazy irrational worries. So much worse! My head snapped towards him my body bolting to attention now in fear of what he was about to say next and he continued…

"I wanted to see what you thought of it first though."

I glanced out at the dark yard hoping for some big flashing answer to just appear in my line of sight but nothing came because what do you say when your man wants to put his life on the line for someone else and I whispered helplessly…

"That's really wonderful of you." Though secretly I hated the idea trying to calm myself down to a rational state with questions I asked keeping my voice level…

"Can there be complications with that though? It's a major surgery isn't it?"

Meeting his gaze worriedly, he answered calmly…

"It is a major surgery, but the recovery outlook is good."

I held in a gasp unable to think about the possibility if the outlook was bad. I was afraid to say no or he might do it out of spite so I didn't say anything. Eric continued leaning against the side of the car next to me, slid his arm around my shoulder, and explained…

"I'm not doing it unless we are both in on this together…But seeing him so happy tonight…It made me want to see that again…You were right…All the small stuff doesn't matter when just having each other makes them both happy."

I pursed my lips hating that I had said that because right now I wish I hadn't.

"I'm worried."

I finally confessed now needing the back of the car to keep my legs from wobbling in fear. I took his hand and he glanced back at me, his eyes searching mine for answers…

"I can't lose you too." I whispered and he brought the back his hand to my cheek, which caused a deep heart wrenching worry inside me.

I stammered for my next words and confessed…"My head is screaming NO, but my heart can't deny you the right to want to save him, I know how much you love him, how much we all do."

I felt a tear run down my cheek.

Eric turned to me and wrapped his arms around me. It was in that moment when I collapsed in his embrace that I realized Eric had gone further than I could. He was talking about making a huge sacrifice for love, so if he could, why couldn't I? Why was this so hard?

I buried my face in his chest and finally offered…

"Let's talk about it tomorrow after we've both slept on it okay?"

He brushed away a few stray tears from my face and declared with a nod…

"I'm not doing anything unless we are 100%. And I will never leave you."

"You better not." I challenged and gazed up into his deep blue eyes illuminated by the moonlight. He was everything to me, I knew that now.

"And I wouldn't even know if I would be compatible until they tested me, they could turn me away if I'm not."

I hated to think Eric's incompatibility could possibly be a good thing, but I didn't want to be selfish, although I think I could safely admit, I was terrified for him.

"Knowing my luck you would be perfect."

I creased my brows my worried gaze meeting his and Eric smiled faintly in assurance.

"I'm the lucky one." He concluded melting my heart right there on the spot.

Eric leaned in, his mouth taking mine and I pressed back into the car wanting to inhale him right now like oxygen because I needed him.

As the kiss deepened he swept me up in his arms and set me down on top of the hood. I no longer cared about the stupid embarrassing pictures or gossip about our sex lives or any of it. I knew what mattered, and Tara was so right. I WAS one lucky bitch.

"Why don't we go inside." I suggested with lucid eyes after coming up for air and Eric nodded and agreed breathlessly…

"Yeah."

He smiled drunkenly and then he brought his hand up to cup my neck, his thumb brushing my jaw tenderly and I gazed back into his lovelorn eyes and Eric confessed…

"But there's something else I need to ask you."

I stopped and gazed at him worriedly not sure if I was ready for another bombshell, my heart couldn't take it and I asked him leerily…

"You aren't going to tell me you want to donate any more of your body parts are you?"

He simply smirked and then took something out of his pocket. It glittered in the moonlight and as it came into focus I realized what it was suddenly stupefied.

_Oh my fucking God! _

_That was a ring!_

_Something he wanted to ask me? _

_Eric was about to ask me to marry him!_

It was as if I was standing outside myself looking in on this very intimate moment, knowing it would forever be imprinted in my brain for as long as I lived.

My mouth made an "O" shape when I saw the beautiful ring, my gaze flickered with his, the full moon shining down as the crickets chirped and cicadas sung. My heart was literally too big for my chest, I was sure of it because it was pounding so hard my hand flew up to hold it in. I was certain had my mind not just turned to mush, and the butterflies in my stomach had not swarmed around my voice box, I may have intended to say something.

He held up the ring offering it to me. My eyes were nearly blinded by its beauty, it was the most stunning ring I had ever seen, a golden pearl offset by a cluster of diamonds and what I could only assume was amethyst around the center.

"It belonged to my mother, but it's been in my family for generations."

He explained, and I remained speechless. The only noise I could translate was my rapidly beating heart hammering in my ears as he waited for me to give him my hand. _Was this really happening right now? To me? I could scarcely believe it!_

He waited until our gazes locked and then Eric spoke pulling at my heartstrings.

"My Dearest Sookie Stackhouse, Conqueror of my Heart, Temptress in a Red Dress, Believer in True Loves Eternal Bond, Ruler of my Soul, and Mother of my Child…Will you marry me?"

I gasped my eyes tearing up in happiness because those were the words I had been longing to hear as I looked down at the beautiful gift and back up into Eric's handsome eyes and then my body finally snapped and I reached up to shower him with kisses. It felt like everything inside me had culminated and beamed outwards with pure unbridled joy. His lips caught mine and then he pulled back and asked me apprehensively...

"So, is that a yes?"

My smile beamed with happiness and I nodded my head, laughing.

"Yes, that is a yes."

I wiped a stray tear from my cheek and I leaned in to kiss him again, swatting his chest lightly I replied chiding him as I pulled back to look into his gaze...

"You are so bad."

"Yes, but that's why you love me." He admitted and I confessed…

"You're just lucky I love you so much." I countered and we both went in for another kiss.

xxxxxx

The next morning birds were singing, bee's were buzzing, the sun was shining and I couldn't get over how beautiful my ring was.

We made love till sunrise and then fell asleep naked in each others arms. I felt like a real woman now no longer a child, the future Mrs. Northman, and it was amazing. Eric was amazing.

I couldn't wait to show off my new ring after we got in another round of morning sex that was, then I was off to the hospital to tell my Gran and Fintan the happy news. I wanted Eric to come with to tell them, but he had to deal with the press at work for his new performer. Apparently they were big Techno group called MIA from Germany, well known through Europe and the US, although I had never heard of them.

I kissed him goodbye and drove over to the hospital in my little Gremlin. There was a pep in my step and that song 'Walking on Sunshine' kept playing through my head.

I smiled as a gentleman held the door open for me and I thanked him. I saw the cafeteria remembering the reception from last night and thought happily that Eric and I would soon have a reception of our own to share too. I looked down at my ring again wondering what my Gran would say when she saw it, barely hearing the parade of sirens outside. But then several nurses dropped what they were doing and ran past me as they asked over the PA for all available technicians to report to the ER.

I looked on anxiously as they dropped the stretcher and the wheels hit the ground, rolling the person inside from the first ambulance. I wondered what happened to them then they began to rush the cart towards me and I stepped to the side to let them pass, watching it all whir around me, hoping whoever it was, they could save him.

I turned to head towards the elevator bank, but as the patient turned his blood covered face his gaze met mine and the recognition set in as heavy pits sunk in my stomach and my face fell.

_Oh my God!_

"Bill?"

Was all I could utter before they rushed him past me and through the double doors leading into the Emergency Room.


	32. Chapter 32

**AN: **Well we are getting close, two more chapters after this, so I hope you stay tuned. This one is going to be an angsty one, and you might want to grab a tissue too, just a heads up. ;) **A BIG SHOUTOUT for this chapter goes to my fabulous friend, Simba317**. I dont normally use a beta hehe, obviously. ) But she asked if she could beta this one and Im very happy she did, because she is fuckawesome with advice and always helps to make sure I stay on track. So THANK YOU SIMBA, you rock! xoxo. And thanks again to everyone for reading and reviewing this story as well. Hope this chapter does not disappoint. BTW this one is pure SPOV but the next one is pure EPOV, so incase you were getting antsy to hear from our blonde Viking god, he's coming very soon. ;)

**Chapter 32-Hemmorhage**

_SPOV_

I couldn't just stand there and watch them wheel him past me without saying anything so I rushed through the double doors behind them proclaiming…

"Wait!"

A large black woman stepped out from behind the counter to block me from going any further, barking, "Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to take a seat!"

My eyes flew past her as I watched them wheel him into another room and I asked her with concern, "What…what happened to him?"

"Are you family?" she asked me sternly and I shook my head. Bill looked like he was in bad shape and she shook her head and answered roughly, "Unless you're family or his wife, you can't go back there, honey."

She sat down at her desk again and flipped through some papers. I wasn't one to sit around and wait patiently though. Had it been anyone I knew, I would have done the same. Her words gave me an idea. I confessed, showing her my ring, knowing I would surely go to hell for this, "I'm engaged."

It really wasn't a full lie, its not like I wasn't engaged, just not to him and she pursed her lips in thought as she scanned me, sizing me up to gage whether or not I was telling the truth and finally she nodded and gave me a paper bracelet. "Fine, you can go, but if anyone asks, you're his wife."

The word wife and Bill in the same sentence made me nauseous, but it was for the greater good, so I finally concluded, "Fine."

She didn't even look at me. I wondered where he was picked up since he arrived by ambulance. "You don't happen to know…" But another gurney flew through the doors cutting me off. I couldn't see who was in it, but it looked like a small person hooked up to an oxygen machine accompanied by a frantic man and woman with whom I could only assume were the parents, trailing behind in tears.

"Get them out of the way! We have to get her into the OR Stat!" one of the doctors proclaimed loudly. The nurse that was helping me ran up to take the parents to another part of the hospital.

My heart went out to them. I didn't know what it was like to be a parent yet, but I had a feeling if something happened to my baby I would be a basket case. I reluctantly carried on down the hallway in search of Bill, having the sinking feeling in my gut that something far worse was waiting around the corner.

When I found his room, Bill was with two technicians, one stitching up his face and the other examining his leg when I poked my head in.

"Bill?" I questioned, not sure whether or not he was okay to have visitors.

He smiled. "Sookie?"

I scrunched my nose hating how he made my name sound like 'Suucky.'

He met my gaze and then winced in pain, confessing with relief, "You look like an angel right now. I knew you would come."

He held out his hand to me but I was reluctant to take it and asked the technician instead, "What happened to him?"

"Car accident, miss."

"Oh my God, Bill! Are you alright?" I finally went over to him in concern and he hissed again in pain as the technician pulled on the thread that bound together the gash on his head.

He grabbed my arm, "I can't remember. I lost everything. I wanted to die, but now that you're here, I know it will be okay."

The technician who finished stitching him was done and the other asked him if it hurt when he pulled on his leg.

"I don't know. Everything feels numb. Can I go home? I just want to go home now. My darling Sookie could take me. Couldn't you?"

I met his gaze hesitant to agree to anything right now. Besides, Bill wasn't acting quite like himself. I asked him point blank, "Bill, how did this happen, who did this to you?"

"He did it to himself," a familiar voice from behind replied and I turned to see Officer Andy Bellefleur standing there. His gaze was grim and he nodded to me.

"Gentlemen, will you excuse us for a moment?" asked the officer.

"He has to go down to Radiology first for X-rays," one of the technicians proclaimed sharply.

Andy replied nonchalantly, "Fine, do what you have to do."

The other technician picked up the phone by the computer and called who I could only assume was the radiology department.

Andy grunted and was shuffled into the hallway by the disgruntled technician while the other was on the phone.

"Sookie, will you go with me, please?" Bill asked grabbing my hand. I knew he wasn't himself right now and he was hurt. I still felt a basic human compassion for him despite our bad history, but something felt wrong about it this time.

The technician finished his call and stepped past us interrupting Bill and replied in warning, "You have two minutes." Bill didn't care though, his eyes never left mine, waiting for my reply with desperate eyes.

"I don't know," I finally answered.

Bill's face fell in disappointment and he replied, "I know I don't deserve your compassion, not after what I did to you. God, that's how I ended up here in the first place, don't you see? …I couldn't look at myself in the mirror after you left me, Sookie I'm so sorry, I'm ashamed at what I have become, and even more ashamed of having raped you."

There was a heaviness in my chest as the whirlwind of emotions came flying back. It was the first time Bill had ever spoken that word. I had done a lot of crying and soul searching since that night, but it still hurt to think about it.

But when I saw Andy standing there with a stunned expression on his face, my heart stopped. I knew he had heard Bill. I didn't want to get into this right now.

Andy remarked in his tough cop voice, "Well, well, well, Compton, you are racking up one hell of a ticket tonight. First, you put a little girl in the hospital. Then, you proceed to ram your car into the telephone pole off Old Highway 52. You test out with a 0.15 blood alcohol level, I might add and now this? I won't even mention how it looked like you were trying to flee the scene."

"What?" I asked in surprise, forgetting about Bills confession for a moment and wondering what on earth Andy was talking about.

"He ran right through a red light ramming straight into their car, like he was on a damn suicide mission," Andy explained and I covered my mouth in disbelief.

"I-I didn't! It was an accident. Oh God!" Bill proclaimed, putting his hands to his face. He looked as if he was about to cry.

"The term is 'collision," Andy corrected.

"Is she going to be okay?" Bill asked in desperation.

Andy glanced down at the floor and he shook his head, "I don't know. She's in the OR right now, but her father is definitely pressing charges. They're talking reckless endangerment from the witness' statements. If she dies, that's vehicular homicide."

Bill kept shaking his head, recoiling into himself. "No, this can't be happening! This can't be happening! I didn't mean to hurt anyone…" he continued to mumble.

"God dammit Bill! You really fucked yourself over on this one!" Andy declared unsympathetically.

I didn't know what to do or say, I was in shock.

"You're making it really hard for me to help you right now," Andy continued, "Despite your generous donation to the city after that parking ticket last month, I don't know how you're going to buy yourself out of this, especially if she doesn't make it."

I kept shaking my head, thinking anxiously about that poor little girl. And then it clicked for me. That was her. That was who they were wheeling into the ER after Bill. Those were her frantic parents with that ambulance following Bill. It all became so disturbingly real. I took a step away from him, my heart sinking.

I knew I needed to get out of there. I needed to see my gran. She was the only person besides Eric who could help me through this and I confessed gasping for air, "I have to go."

"No! No, Sookie! You can't go! You're my angel! You're supposed to help me through this!" Bill sobbed.

"I-I have to see my gran...and Eric's uncle…his kidneys…" I explained, backing out the room.

Bill met my gaze with teary eyes, "Sookie, please…" Andy just stood there.

I turned my heel and stormed out. I couldn't look back.

I was half way down the hall when I heard his voice behind me again.

"Is it true? Did he rape you?" I cringed when Andy's words echoed through my brain.

If there was anything I wanted to talk about today, it certainly wasn't that and I snapped back at him, "He's clearly delusional right now, isn't he?"

Andy glanced towards Bill's room and I stammered wanting to be anywhere but here in this spot right now.

"Sookie, if he did do it, you can still press charges," Andy assured me, but right now, I wanted to get as far away as possible from Bill Compton. I hurried away without a response.

Only as it turned out, there were more horrors waiting for me around every bend in this ER. Rushing out into the hallway, I turned the corner and nearly walked right into a woman sobbing in a room by herself.

I knew who it was before I even saw her face. It was the mother of that little girl. I felt my chest stiffen with emotion and noticed she was clutching something furry in her hand. When she looked up, I had no choice but to go to her and I sat down quietly next to her. She drew back when she saw me and I knew I was intruding on a very private, heart wrenching moment, but I just had to be there for this woman right now, I couldn't explain it. Even if I could barely qualify as a mom, I knew she needed someone to share her pain with, mother to mother.

I gently placed my hand on her back and whispered softly, "I'm sorry."

The woman turned to look at me her eyes stained red from crying and she nodded her head unable to even speak before her face welled up again and another round of sobs fought to break free.

"No one deserves this kind of tragedy, no one," I replied and she sniffled.

"I know the man who hit you, I'm sure it was an accident but I know he will do whatever it takes to make this right."

"He can't give me back my daughter," she replied bitterly.

I glanced down at the floor, hoping things weren't as bad as they seemed right now, but I feared they were. The mother spoke in between sharp intakes of breath. "I was holding…her…in my arms…just minutes before it happened."

She started crying again, and it was hard for her to breathe, let alone keep it together. Her sadness was devastating. I could feel the pain rolling off her in waves as if it were my own.

"She's just a little girl!" She shook her head and looked at me angrily as if I was the one who could decide this child's fate.

"Why couldn't it have been me?"

Dropping the little stuffed animal she was holding on the floor, no longer possessing the strength to pick it up, she fell prey to the tears once more and cried out with heart aching pain,

"She didn't deserve it, she's my only baby! My child! My entire world!"

I felt a tear slide down my cheek and I took her hand in mine and I replied gently, "She's in the best place she can be right now, I'm sure they will do whatever they can to save her."

I picked up what I now recognized as a small stuffed collie and handed it to her gently.

The mother glanced down at the item in her hands and she replied doubtfully, "She has internal bleeding. I don't think she's going to make it."

My heart sank in dread for this poor woman and I looked back into her destroyed eyes, wondering if I somehow caused this.

"Mrs. St. Clair! The Doctor can speak to you now. She's out of the OR and they'll be bringing her up to ICU shortly," a technician replied.

She stood up abruptly, marching after the technician. Pulling her purse over her shoulder, she clumsily dropped the animal again.

I picked it up and called out to her, but they went inside another set of double doors.

"Mrs. St. Clair!"

"You can't go back there!" a nurse announced, cutting me off before I could push through the doors.

"She dropped this," I explained.

"Just leave it at the front desk. Someone will make sure she gets it," she replied, but I thought that wasn't very likely in the chaos of this place. Then I remembered they said they were bringing her up to the ICU. I knew where that was. Fintan was up there.

I couldn't explain it, but I somehow felt linked to this little girl I didn't even know. I had to get that dog back to her. So I exited the ER and returned to the bank of elevators. Taking it up to the 5th floor, I found a bench and waited. I thought about going to see Gran and Fintan, but I didn't want to risk missing them.

About fifteen minutes later, I saw a group of people walking down the hall next to a gurney. One of them was Mrs. St. Clair."

Relief flooded my veins when I saw them and I rushed over to catch up to them. She was holding one side of the gurney while the man who I assumed was her husband held the other and they all walked along the corridor together.

"Mrs. St. Clair!" I called to her and her teary face turned to me in confusion.

They stopped moving and I explained, "You dropped this downstairs."

For a moment everyone just stood there in silence staring at me and I straightened up awkwardly, wondering if I had suddenly sprouted ass ears from my head, when Mr. St. Clair finally spoke, "Thank you Miss?"

I nodded my head offering, "Stackhouse, it's Sookie Stackhouse, and it was no trouble."

He took it from me and placed the animal down next to his daughter.

The little girl glanced up at it and remarked with a smile, "Dean!"

I smiled softly, happy that I could return this to her even if it was such a small token, but as my gaze fell on the girl's face at those familiar blue eyes and blonde hair, my smile broke in horror. It was her. It was,

_"Eve?"_

I gasped, recognizing the little girl from the fair. It was so brief, but she had made an imprint on Eric's heart and mine. There was no way we could ever forget her.

"Sorry, sir, we have to get her into her room," One of the technicians replied, pushing her past us.

Mr. St. Clair turned to me and asked, "How do you know my wife and my daughter?"

We watched them hook her up to the equipment in the room and I glanced back at Mrs. St. Clair hesitantly.

"She knows the man who hit us," his wife replied.

His reluctant smile faded.

"I can explain," I answered in panic, knowing what that look meant.

But before I could say anything else he spat back, "Get out!"

"Charles!" Mrs. St. Clair argued but he shook his head and replied, "No, Jennifer, I've seen how these assholes work. He sent her here to try to get us to drop the charges."

My head snapped back in shock and I insisted, "No, that's not true. I saw your wife in the lobby! As a new mother myself, my heart went out to her!"

"Just get out of here!" he yelled stinging me, and I felt my eyes tear up once more.

I had no other choice but to leave her room because I was clearly no longer welcome.

"I'm sorry," I finally muttered meeting their gazes sadly and left with my head hung low.

I felt so helpless, so sick to my stomach. It wasn't the pregnancy sickness, but my guilt living, breathing, festering and balling up inside me. My head hurt, my whole body shook feverishly. That happy joyful feeling from this morning was completely gone and replaced with sickening dread.

My eyes were blurry as I wandered aimlessly down the hall not sure where to go. I just knew that I couldn't give up. I needed to help that family in any way I could, no matter what the cost, even if they did blame me.

"Sookie?"

I recognized the voice as my gran's and quickly wiped my tears away, trying to pull myself together and turned around to face her.

"My heavens, child! What's wrong?" she asked, taking my hands in hers. I didn't want to burden her with my pain, not after what she herself was going through, so I shook my head not wanting to say it.

"I know when my Sweet Pea is upset and honey, you are upset. Did something happen to Eric?"

She put her hand on my cheek which forced me to look at her. I shook my head and replied softly with pain filled eyes, "Bill was in a car accident. He was driving drunk and he hit a family. Their little girl is here in the ICU and has internal bleeding with a poor recovery outlook. And to top it all off, I know her."

Gran's face fell. I felt dizzy when I thought about the magnitude of it all, but summoned the strength to look at her through my tear stained eyes. She pulled me to her for a hug while exclaiming, "Oh Dear. I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?"

She looked at me for another moment in question, my very pregnant pause giving her all the answer she needed and then she pulled me back into her arms and declared, "I will certainly contact the church and we can organize a prayer circle and maybe even a start fund to help her parents out."

I met my gran's gaze miserably and I shook my head replying, "I don't know if they would accept that. I spoke to her mother, but her father doesn't want me anywhere near her. He thinks I'm working for Bill."

I put my hand up to my spinning brain and closed my eyes in an attempt to keep it together right now before I had a total melt down.

She exhaled deeply and put her hand on my shoulders, suggesting, "I will call the church, but right now how about we do a little praying ourselves in the chapel?"

I met her gaze reluctantly. It had been a long time since I had gone to pray with my gran and I certainly hadn't earned any points in the church department lately, but maybe it would help. I didn't really have any other options at the moment anyway. So I humored her.

Strangely, being in that small chapel again next to my gran did help. We both lit several candles and then we sat down in one of the pews and prayed. After some time had passed Gran took my hand in hers and squeezed it. I didn't know what I would do without her.

"Thank you," I remarked quietly.

She nodded her head and replied, "Any time. The man upstairs has gotten me through a lot in my long life."

"I know, I prayed for Fintan too," I confessed and she smiled softly.

"There's a lot of power in prayer," Gran declared in an attempt to assure me.

I squeezed her hand in thanks and that's when she glanced down and proclaimed in surprise, "Sugarplum, is that what I think it is on your finger?"

I gazed at my hand and pursed my lips, reminded again of how this day had started out so wonderful and how it had been shot to hell and explained, "Yes, I was coming here to tell you and Fintan the news."

"Oh Sweetheart, I am so thrilled for you. I know you both will be very happy together and there isn't a better man that I could have picked for my granddaughter."

"I just don't feel much like celebrating right now," I confessed sadly looking away for a moment.

However, she took my hand again and remarked, "You will though, and we will all be there celebrating with you both."

I offered her a faint smile and agreed apathetically, "I hope so."

She stood up and answered, "I know so. And I also know that is the most stunning ring I have ever seen. That boy certainly has good taste."

I couldn't help but look down at my ring again, feeling a pang in my heart for Eric.

I got up to follow her out and she put her arm around me remarking, "I think we should go upstairs to say hello to Fintan, flash him that ring of yours, and then you should go home to your doting fiancé."

I met her gaze shaking my head in disagreement about to offer up my objection when she concluded, "It's not going to do you any good sitting here worrying. The stress isn't good for the baby either. You need to go home to Eric."

"Gran, I—"

"I don't often pull rank on you, Sugar, but trust me when I say I will."

My face fell, surprised by her reply and I closed my mouth, left with nothing to argue.

When we returned up to the 5th floor, I actually felt better in a way. The anguish was still horrible, but the pain had died down to a dull roar rather than a blasting horn. I think Gran taking control of this runaway train helped to calm me a little bit. She had a way of putting everything in perspective.

Only, when we got upstairs I saw Mrs. St. Clair in the hallway again and the grief all came rushing back.

Our eyes connected and then she approached us and requested to my surprise, "My daughter is asking for you. Will you please come?"

I met my gran's gaze with concern and she answered softly noting the seriousness of the situation and heartache of the other woman instantly, "Go ahead, Dear. I'll be with Fintan. Just come and see us when you are done okay?"

I nodded and then we watched my gran as she continued finding her way down the hall. Mrs. St. Clair glanced at me for a moment in query and I knew what had to be going through her mind. _Why was I still here?_ I offered, "My grandfather is here in the ICU too. He's got chronic kidney disease."

"I'm sorry," she replied flatly, her eyes flashing to mine briefly before her gaze dropped.

"So how is she?" I asked reluctantly not sure how to behave because it was clear things looked grim and she answered numbly, "Same as before."

"Sorry," I mumbled knowing my acknowledgement wouldn't do her any good.

We walked into the room together and she explained, "My husband, Charles, went downstairs to give a statement to the police."

I knew she was referring to the fact that he would be back soon so I should make it fast and I nodded my head as we both entered her room.

When my eyes fell on Eve my heart started aching again. I remembered her now as if I had only just met her yesterday. The last time we saw her, she was so vibrant, so full of life, such an inspiration. But now, now she was tied up to tubes and an oxygen mask while laying motionless in her little hospital bed. I could tell she was in pain despite the tube of Novocain running from the IV stand into her arm.

"Hello sweetheart!" I spoke softly, smiling warmly for her, even though the sight of her, this child having to go through all of this, made me feel like balling into tears. She smiled.

"You're here!" She raised her tiny head off the pillows and I moved closer, not wanting her to strain her self.

"Of course I am."

I glanced to her mom reluctantly and then sat down quietly in the chair next to her bed as her mother stood on the other side with arms crossed nervously.

"What would you like to talk about honey?"

"I remember you," she replied and I nodded my head.

Folding my hands I answered, "I remember you too. You knew that I was going to have a baby."

I placed my hand over my stomach and I concluded with a small smile, "And you were right."

Eve smiled tiredly and she lay her head back to her pillow and she answered, "Yes, I remember. And you were trying to fit that silly panther in the photo booth with you."

"Yes, that's right."

She smiled again and she asked me curiously, "How come you're here?"

I glanced at Mrs. St. Clair, not sure I should venture onto that topic. This girl needed all the positive energy she could get, so I simply answered, "I'm here visiting someone."

"Someone important to you?"

I nodded my head in affirmation. "Yes."

"Do you love him?"

I nodded my head, "Yes, he's my grandfather, I just found out he was my grandfather actually. And yesterday he married my grandmother in the hospital chapel here after they had been separated for fifty years!"

I tried to make it sound romantic for her and she nodded again and met my gaze, "That's nice. So how come he's in the hospital?"

I frowned, still not sure I should get into it, but she looked genuinely interested so I edged around it, "He's got a bad disease that has infected his kidneys."

"What disease?"

"Chronic kidney disease." She looked at me confused so I explained, "You see, his kidneys are failing him and if they shut down all the way he will die, so he has to go in to get a blood transfusion, new blood, and eventually he will need a new set of kidneys from a donor."

Eve nodded and she remarked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "Maybe I can give him mine?"

Her mom came forward in alarm and I shook my head wanting to nip her comment in the bud before she could say any more for my sake and her mother's. "No sweetheart, my fiancé wants to donate one of his."

"But it would be better if he had two wouldn't it?"

"Evelyn you will do no such thing!" Mrs. St. Clair exclaimed clearly upset again and then her gaze darted to me and she insisted, "I think you need to leave now!"

"Mama, I want her to stay. Can we have a minute please?" Eve asked her and I met Mrs. St. Clair's gaze in disbelief.

Her mother folded her arms, but one look from Eve and she was putty in her daughter's hands and we both watched her leave.

Eve turned to me and she held up her stuffed toy collie that had been placed in the bed next to her and she asked me, "Will you please make sure that my mom gets Dean after I go?"

"After you go where?" I asked her confused.

"After I go away," she explained.

My face creased into a frown as I realized she was talking about dying. It was just so wrong hearing a child talk about her potential death and it reawakened that underlying dread buried deep inside me. I took her hand and assured her in an attempt to control my own emotions from leaking out from all over the place.

"No, sweetheart, you are going to be fine. We are all praying for you. You just have to stay strong."

Despite my fight to keep it all together, I felt a tear rush down my cheek as my fear balled up like a lead weight in my stomach.

Eve remarked with a soft smile, "You shouldn't cry, I'm counting on you to be strong for her. She's going to need you more than you know."

I assumed Eve was talking about her mother and it broke my heart.

"Honey…" My voice trailed off as I pleaded with her to not think so grimly shaking my head in denial.

She answered as if possessed by the spirit of someone far beyond her years, "I'm not scared…I'm lucky. I get to say goodbye to everyone I love."

I sucked in a breath and bit my lip hard in attempt to hold in a sob, not wanting to let it out in front of her and she confessed, "I know my mom can use Dean more than me. She always did like him best. Who knows, maybe some day she can have a real dog, I was allergic to them…"

I felt a salty tear fall from my eye and wiped it from my cheek. And Eve asked me, "Will you promise me?"

"Oh Sweetheart!"

I wiped away another tear barely able to contain my grief. But Eve was gazing at me with her big blue eyes and I couldn't turn her down. I would have tried to give her the Mona Lisa if she asked for it in that moment and I shook my head, "Of course, I'll make sure she has it."

Eve nodded, accepting my offer and I admitted, "I'm praying for you honey…A lot of people are."

"And I'm praying for you too…Don't worry, she'll be just fine."

Her mother came back in, speak of the devil, signaling me that it was time to leave and I stood up and concluded, trying to keep my wits about me, "You are going to make it, I just know it."

Eve smiled and she concluded, "Thank you Sookie."

I leaned in and placed a kiss on her cheek before I left. I did my best not to cry when leaving the room because I knew this little girl needed my help more than my tears.

xxx

I knew if I went back to my gran she would just send me home so I had to find a place to hide out for a bit and pull myself together. I returned downstairs to the chapel.

Our candles were still lit when I got there and to my relief, I was alone. I went to light another candle and then pray, hoping my words would make an impact, but I heard voices from outside the door and it broke my concentration, _"Yeah, I think she went in here."_

I turned around curiously to see who was there, part of me was hoping Eric had come, but my face fell in disappointment when I saw Bill standing there with a set of crutches and his face all patched up.

"You have five minutes," Andy Bellefluer declared to Bill from the doorway. Glancing at me apologetically and then he remarked to me, "I'm taking him in after this. I'll be just outside the door, so you just let me know if you need anything."

I creased my brows not wanting to be stuck in a room right now with Bill of all people. Andy closed the door and Bill confessed, "I told them I wouldn't say anything about what happened until he let me talk to you."

I narrowed my gaze feeling a sudden heat rush through my veins, recognizing the slow simmering anger threatening to overflow towards the surface. I glared back at Bill in warning and asked, "Why did you want to see me?"

His gaze fell sadly to the floor and he shook his head saying, "I don't know. I feel horrible about what happened, but I just know that seeing you here today, it made me feel like I could actually start over again. You gave me hope, Sookie. I dared to even think that even a despicable screw up like me could have a second chance."

I couldn't believe he was making this about him right now. His inability to see beyond himself was despicable. My only confusion came from questioning how I could have fallen for someone like Bill? How could I have loved someone so ignorant of what his actions did to others?

My nostrils flared, that anger flushed up to the surface to a dangerous level and I finally snapped, shouting back at him

"YOU SELFISH SON OF A BITCH! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU DID? A LITTLE GIRL IS LAYING THERE DYING BECAUSE OF YOU!"

His gaze dropped in devastation and I thought I actually saw tears in his eyes, but I didn't care. I just wanted to get out of here before I killed him myself.

However, Bill wasn't done, "Sookie! I know I screwed up, and I fully intend to serve my time and do everything humanly possible to make this right again for that little girl and her family, for you, but I need you to help me…You are the only good thing in my life…The only thing I have worth living for."

He actually started to cry and had to sit down in one of the pews.

Perhaps the old me would have felt one shred of empathy for him, but I loathed his very being right now. I leaned in and remarked lowly in a cool tone.

"I don't feel sorry for you any more. I want to make this crystal clear for you, so listen to me and listen good because I do not plan on repeating myself," I hissed.

He looked up at me and met my hard as nails gaze with his pleading eyes, and that's when I let him have it.

"WE ARE OVER! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER, I AM NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND! IM ENGAGED NOW. TO ERIC!"

I flashed him my ring in anger and continued on my tempestuous rampage.

"I AM CERTAINLY NO LONGER YOUR FRIEND. I AM IN NO WAY OBLIGATED TO HELP YOU. SO IF I'M THE ONLY THING YOU HAVE, CONSIDER YOURSELF LEFT WITH NOTHING!"

"What the hell is going on?" Andy asked, poking his head in from the rear of the chapel.

I hissed stepping towards him and away from Bill, "I was just leaving!"

"Sookie, don't go! Please!" Bill begged, but I was so angry that there was fire shooting out of my eyes as I stormed past Andy.

Before I could get too far, I turned to him and concluded to Andy, "Oh and I do want to press those charges…Call me when you are ready to take my statement!"

My angry gaze flashed to his and he nodded his head in approval, taking out his handcuffs for Bill and going over a litany of charges. I spun on my heel and was about to go back upstairs when I crashed headfirst into the massive body that was Eric.

"Sookie?"

I looked up into those familiar blue eyes a mere millimeter away from losing it. _Thank God, he's here!_ I thought, knowing I needed a rock right now. He put his hands on my shoulders and explained, "Adele called me and told me what happened."

"Are you okay?" He asked concerned upon seeing my face. But before I could reply, Andy came out of the chapel with Bill in cuffs.

Eric stiffened up, growling, "Why is it whenever anything bad happens to you, this asshole is always looming around like some kind of buzzing gnat?"

I put my hand on Eric's chest, mentally and physically exhausted, unable to handle any more turmoil. Even if Eric was pissed off at Bill too, I answered quietly before I burst at the seams, "Just let him go."

Eric met my gaze with worried eyes, glancing back from me to Bill and then he finally nodded his head and pulled me back to him in a comforting embrace.

"I'm sorry, Sookie!" Bill announced, still crying.

I buried my head in Eric's chest, blocking Bill out. I was so relieved Eric was here, although I knew now in my heart of hearts, I wasn't leaving this hospital tonight. Even if that was what my grandmother had initially intended to do by calling Eric, I owed it to Eve to stay.

After what seemed like an eternity, I finally looked up into Eric's concerned gaze and replied in response to his earlier question, "I'm hanging in there."

"I heard you yelling from down the hall. Did he do or say anything to you, because if he did…"

I shook my head in reply and answered meeting his dark blue gaze, "I'm fine…Bill was arrested for his accident and I've decided to press charges too for what he did to me."

Eric raised his brows in surprise and asked for clarification, "You did?"

"I'm sick of him pushing me around and all of his bullshit!"

His face fell in subdued anger and he remarked, "I'm proud of you."

My gaze flickered to his in pause, feeling a momentary wave of guilt because I wasn't so sure I didn't just send Bill to the cleaners. I was pissed at him and at the end of my rope, but what was done was done and the more I thought about it, the more I thought he deserved it.

"I actually I secretly wish I could take a Polaroid of Bill behind bars right now. The asshole deserved everything he got," I remarked still flustered.

Eric lips creased into a smile. "Well I don't have a Polaroid, but I think the digital could acquire an image that even your brother would admire."

He actually got me to smile for the first time since this whole day from hell began and I was thankful for that.

Eric leaned in to kiss me his tender lips claiming mine gently and I welcomed him wholeheartedly. It was like taking a long drink of water after weeks of being stranded in the desert. I closed my eyes and combed my hand through his hair, but then he pulled away and proposed, "Come on, let's go upstairs and then I can take you home."

I met his gaze, his words shocking me back into reality. Obviously reluctant to leave, I didn't think I could handle just sitting there worrying about Eve while feeling helpless at home, and I knew Eric would just try to make me forget. So I humored him, taking his hand. "Okay."

We rode on the elevators up to the fifth floor and when we got out I stopped and confessed, "I have to use the ladies' room. I'll catch up to you in just a minute okay?"

Eric smiled softly and I pulled him down to me for a brief parting kiss. Just as I was about to turn back towards Eve's room, he grabbed my hand.

I looked at him in question, wondering why he stopped me. Eric replied with a smirk, "Lover, that's the oldest trick in the book."

"What?" I tried to pretend I was shocked by his accusation and I shook my head, "I'm a pregnant woman. I have been known to pee every now and again."

"Yes, and Fintan has a toilet in his room. Or did you want me to let you go slink off so that cockroach could persuade you to follow him to jail?"

I pursed my lips and gave Eric my hand reluctantly, thinking I had to get more creative with my next excuse. And I didn't appreciate him treating me like a child. I figured the only way to really get Eric to help me was to get him on my side and I explained gently,

"It's Eve you know? The girl Bill hit with his car."

Eric stopped in his tracks and looked at me in question, his brows creasing in concern.

"Her mother doesn't think she will make it."

I closed my eyes trying not to cry again and Eric pulled me into his arms, noting my clear disarray. I felt his body tense and then relax and he whispered in my ear before planting a kiss on my temple, "I'm sorry."

I looked up into his dark gaze wondering if he felt the same attachment to that little girl as I had and finally after a few moments pause, Eric agreed, "Alright, we can go to see her, but after Fintan, okay?"

I creased my brows in painful plea, but I supposed Eric was being fair. I had been here for almost the entire morning and afternoon without so much as popping my head in to see Fintan and he deserved our attention too."Okay," I compromised, taking a deep breath.

Eric took my hand and we walked the rest of the way. When we got to Fintan's room, he was asleep and Gran was sitting there by his side holding his hand. I suddenly felt bad for my gran because she had to deal with this all by herself today and then some. How much grief could one person handle anyway? And here she was trying to make sure I was okay.

"How is he doing?" Eric asked her.

She smiled softly and replied, "They want to send him for another round of dialysis soon, but he has to get his strength up first."

Eric nodded and took the chair on the other side of his bed and Gran looked up at me and mentioned with a smirk, "I see you found our little escape artist."

Eric smirked and he nodded his head with one brow raised, causing me to blush, "Yes I did. It seems she has missed her calling as Saint of the Chapel."

Okay now he was going too far. I rolled my eyes and went over to him and was about to say something else when I remembered my gran was there. "To become a Saint, I think I have to be Catholic, first of all and secondly, perform three miracles. So right now, that doesn't seem very likely."

I didn't want to bring them down but it seemed no matter what I did, I couldn't keep my foot out of my mouth and I met Eric's gaze anxiously.

"Well…" Eric appeared as if he was deep in thought and he came over to put his arm around me, which gave me a warm, electric feeling and he answered, taunting me with his velvety voice, "You helped to bring two lovers together who had been apart for fifty years. That's a miracle."

"Oh I like that one," Gran replied with a smirk and a wink at me. I couldn't help but smile again, even though it was followed by a wave of guilt. I knew exactly what Eric was doing and it was working,

"And you got me to fall in love with you. That's a miracle."

I turned around and swatted his chest remarking with fake appall, "Thanks a lot, I'm so sorry I was that hard to love."

"Oh Sookie, he didn't mean that," my gran protested. I glanced back at Eric who was smirking with that damn brow raised.

"Yes, he did," I asserted.

Eric chuckled and he conceded, "I'm sure I was hard to love, too."

I smirked and kissed his cheek and then I answered truthfully, "Not really."

Gran smiled and she sat back and asked us, "So when is the big day? Are you going to have a big wedding or a small intimate one? Or will you elope?"

I raised my brows truthfully not having given it much thought and I confessed with a smile playing with Eric's hand, "We haven't really talked about it yet."

"Well I'm here to help you with whatever you decide to do," she offered.

I went over to her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks Gran. That really means a lot to us."

"And what do we have here?" we all heard Fintan jump in groggily from the side.

"Oh we are just gushing about a wedding," Gran explained.

"Whose wedding? Our wedding?" Fintan tried to push himself up and mused, "That was a night to remember. Which reminds me, I have to send Sofia the pictures. She would have loved it, if only she wasn't still at Oxford."

We all looked at each other, knowing the battle between reminding Fintan about Eric's mother was a lost cause. So instead, Gran got up to help him, her face unwavering and then she remarked to me, "I think you better show him, Sweetheart."

I held up my hand and Fintan squinted his eyes and he asked unable to see, "What is that?"

"Bring it closer Dear." Gran suggested and I placed my hand in Fintan's so he could get a better look at it.

When the realization hit his face it was so cute. His eyes grew big and round and he smiled just like a little kid on his birthday. "Oohhh, you mean he-? You mean you-?" Fintan glanced from Eric to me and I couldn't help but giggle as it all clicked for him.

"Yes, unless she's engaged to someone else she hasn't told me about," Eric winked.

I gave him a quick eye toss, knowing that he was just being silly and Fintan put his hand over mine and remarked, "My Dear it is lovely, not quite as lovely as you, but it is a fitting ring for such a beautiful young woman."

He lifted his head and glanced to Eric and remarked with a smug grin, "You did a good job, my boy."

"Thank you." Eric replied and I smiled at him and bit my lip. He really did, I thought, loving him even more right now if that was possible.

"You two are going to make the cutest baby ever," my gran gushed and I blushed.

"Yes, indeed. It will have Eric's sparkling eyes and Sookie's shining blonde halo of hair," Fintan mused and I shook my head knowing they could go all day if we let them.

"Okay okay. Yes, there is a good chance it could be blonde."

"Only a good chance? Is there something you would like to tell me?" Eric asked clearly bemused by my choice of words and I nodded trying to think of a good comeback when a young nurse rushed in.

"Mr. Brigant, we need to prep you for surgery!" she pronounced.

"What?" Eric asked caught off guard, voicing our confusion at the moment.

Fintan asked, perplexed, "I don't understand Darling, are we trying a new dialysis procedure?"

"Our hospital administrator will be here in a few minutes to go over the paperwork, but if you don't mind Id like to take you to the restroom to wash up," the young nurse explained. She was strangely cheerful for getting someone ready for surgery.

"I don't understand," my gran repeated, standing now, protective of Fintan she asked worriedly, "Is something wrong with him? Did the machines tell you something?"

She smiled and shook her head replying, "No, nothing is wrong. In fact, there's been a miracle."

We all met her gaze in confusion and I was getting this weird feeling again, like waiting for the other shoe to drop. "A miracle?" I asked.

She nodded in affirmation and announced with excitement,"We have a donor for you!"

My head was spinning as my gran approached her and she asked in disbelief,"Come again?"

And then the other shoe dropped.

I couldn't wait for her reply. This underlying fear was eating me up inside and before she even uttered another syllable, I bolted from that room and took off down the hall towards Eve's room. _'It couldn't be her, it couldn't be her,' _I kept telling myself as I ran breathlessly to see for myself. '_No, God please don't let it be her!'_ I pleaded as the tears began to form in my eyes.

I rounded the corner and tore down the hall as if the devil were chasing me through the hospital, fueled by panic and terror. When I turned the corner and skidded to a stop, I was standing breathlessly in front of her empty bed. The room was vacated. All I could hear was the faint whisper of the wind as it blew gently through the windows. All of my fears confirming the truth, I choked back a sob, knowing my breakdown this time was only mere seconds away.

And then I felt this pain tear through my womb, the pain so great this time I couldn't stand it. With trembling knees I saw the stuffed Collie on the bed and the threshold broke. I knew she was gone. All I could think was why did this happen? After all we went through, after our prayers and tears. Why? What kind of a God could do this to a little girl? How could I believe in such a God?

The need for air became too overpowering as my lungs suffocated in stifled silence.

Something warm brushed against my thigh and the final clench, I looked down, my eyes widening in horror when I saw a long drop of blood running down my leg. And the first sob came out, suddenly breaking under the pressure.

In one full swoop my world came crumbling down as my knees hit the floor.


	33. Chapter 33

**AN:** I just took a look at my reviews and my jaw has hit the floor, almost 920 something? Woah when did that happen? LOL, so first off thank you to all of you for reading and so diligently reviewing this story. No wonder its been so fun to write. :D Secondly, this chapter turned out to be huuge, like 31 pages huge, lol. So Im going to split it up into two parts. I hope you like EPOV because its ALL from him, both parts, haha. I guess the Viking had a lot to get off his chest. ;) Since I dont want to confuse you by posting 2 at once and Im actually still tweeking part 2 and maybe adding a small slice of lemon to go with the main dish, Im going to wait a couple days to release it, but hopefully this chapter will satisfy for a little bit at least. I didn't intend to write these chapters seperately so it kind of cuts off in a weird place, lol. Sorry for that in advance but it was the best place to chop. Anyhow, thank you again and I hope you enjoy. xoxo

**Chapter 33-Hide and Seek****  
**  
**_EPOV_****  
**  
"Sookie!"

I saw her go down and my heart stopped in that moment.

It didn't take much for me to make the connection. Somehow Eve had volunteered to be Fintan's donor. I don't know how they let a child make such a decision, but judging from the vacant room and dead feeling inside it, I had to assume it was her last wish. My thoughts went out to her and her family, but right now my primary concern was Sookie.

When she took off like a bat out of hell, I knew something was dreadfully wrong.

I didn't have time to panic when I found her, I just reacted, rushing over I swept her up in my arms, realizing she had fainted and I tried to coax her out of her slumber.

"Sookie! Sookie wake up!"

It wasn't until I felt the warm sticky blood sliding against my fingers as I gripped her, that the panic truly set in.

_Oh God!__  
_  
"Sookie! Wake up please!"

She needed to see a doctor, I knew she did. I carried her out of the room and flagged down the nearest nurse...

"She's bleeding and she's fainted." I explained trying to keep my wits about me as the nurse took one look at her and she reached for a phone behind her desk.

When she was finished, she told me to wait till they could get us a chair to take her down to the ER, but I knew that would take too long. Sookie needed medical attention like yesterday. I was doing my best not to panic although I confess many very painfully disturbing thoughts ran through my head while forced to wait for help. The nurse gave me the room number when I exclaimed that she could be having a miscarriage right now and I bolted into the nearest open elevator. I didn't have time to tell Adele where we were or what happened, just hoping she could handle Fintan herself.

I took out my phone not really caring about the hospital's no cell phone rule calling Sookie's specialist.

_"Hello?"_ He answered and I replied in a commanding voice in an attempt to cover up my worry.

"Alcide, this is Eric...Northman...I need you to see Sookie right now...She's collapsed and hemorrhaging."

_"Where are you?"_ He asked with concern and I answered now frantic because I couldn't find the room number the nurse mentioned while carrying Sookie and talking on the phone...

"We're at Shreveport Medical Hospital and we will be in room 159 as soon as I can find the damn place."

Alcide replied...

_"Okay, I'm leaving my office now, just hold tight!"_

"Mr. Northman?" A technician was waving at me from the end of the hallway and I figured the nurse upstairs had called them down here, so she was there to help.

She brought us into an examination room and she helped me take Sookie's clothes off, clean her up, and dress her in hospital garments.

Alcide got there about 15 minutes later, clearly having worked myself into a frenzy of worry by this point, I asked him.

"She's not losing the baby is she? She's going to be alright?"

Alcide sat down next to the examination table Sookie was laying on, still unconscious and he pressed on her stomach. I hated seeing her like this. It reminded me far too much of that time she was in the hospital after Bill raped her. She was too precious to me to see her go through that again.

"You found her just as it began to happen?" He asked me and I nodded my head in affirmation.

"Yes as far as I know she was fine up until then."

"Can you think of anything that may have caused her stress such as overexerting physical activity or mental trauma."

I explained the situation with my Uncle and Eve to him as he opened her legs and shined a flashlight inside her.

I took Sookie's hand needing to know she was okay. I couldn't bear to think of it if she lost the baby. I just needed to know she would be okay.

He moved over her and placed his stethoscope over her abdomen and listened. I sat there for a long time staring at him waiting in suspense wondering if he was going to tell me something I couldn't handle right now. But I knew I had to be here for Sookie, so I put up a mental brick wall in my mind cutting myself off from the dark thoughts.

"What?" I asked on the edge of maintaining my control before I reacted physically to my tortured suspense.

"As far as I can tell, there is still a 2nd heartbeat, her heart rate is fine also, slow but fine; and the bleeding has stopped so that's a good sign."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and squeezed Sookie's hand.

"Judging from the small amount of blood, I would say she had a Subchorionic hemorrhage."

"A what?"

"Bleeding during the first trimester is not uncommon, and many women think they are actually having a period. Subchorionic hemorrhage is not the result of anything the mother has done. It is suspected that it occurs from the rapid growth of the gestational sac."

He explained and I tried to wrap my brain around what that meant.

Just as he was about to elaborate due to the confused look on my face Sookie began to rouse with a soft moan.

I immediately sat down wanting to be the first thing she saw when she opened her eyes...

"Sookie honey?"

She blinked tiredly and looked around asking disoriented...

"Where am I?"

"You're at the hospital."

Her confused gaze moved from me to Alcide and then as if a light switched on in her head she shot up and asked...

"Eve?"

I closed my eyes painfully not wanting to be the one to break the news to her again and I glanced to Alcide in an attempt to find my bearings.

"Sookie you can't think about her right now...You need to think about you and the baby."

Her face fell and she asked with creased brows...

"She's dead isn't she?"

As much as I wanted to tell her she was still alive if only to see that brightness on her face once more, I couldn't lie and finally nodded my head.

"Sookie you need to go home and take it easy for the next couple days."

Alcide offered trying to change the subject.

"I failed then...we all failed." She answered sadly ignoring Alcide's advice.

She glanced down at her abdomen placing her hand over it and then she began to cry once more...

"I lost the baby too."

I reached over and took her in my arms assuring her...

"No, the baby is fine, you will be also, but you have to do what the doctor says."

She paused for a moment and then stiffened up, her scared gaze meeting mine.

"How can you tell me to go home and go to bed after all that's happened? How can I ever sleep after all of this? When my life has become one big nightmare?"

She glared at me with those big broken doe eyes and I wished I could tell her it was going to be fine, that it would be okay, but the truth was I didn't know.

"I can tell you that because I don't want you to lose the baby, you are still at high risk until you hit ten weeks, isn't that right?" I turned to Alcide recalling he had mentioned something like that before and Alcide nodded...

"It's a precaution, but its better to be safe than sorry, you will be at ten weeks in a few days. If this wasn't a subchorionic hemorrhage it could mean you are a high risk pregnancy so we need to watch for more bleeding, and you might want to lay off the sex for a couple days too." He added looking pointedly at me.

I met his gaze in annoyance, why didn't he just ask me to cut off an arm? I thought momentarily put off by his suggestion. But I knew I would do whatever it took to ensure Sookie had the best care she could get so I reluctantly agreed taking her hand in mine.

"We can do that." I offered stiffly and Alcide nodded and patted my shoulder in assurance...

"When she comes in on Thursday for her appointment I can give her an ultrasound and if it looks good, you can go back to your normal activity."

I glanced to Sookie who appeared pissed, but I was pretty certain it wasn't because the doctor just said no sex.

I didn't know what to say or do. Other than to offer a empathetic…

"I'm sorry," to Sookie. I knew she had gone through the wringer these last few days, first with Fintan, then with Eve, we both had. It hurt me more than anything however to see her go through so much trauma. She didn't deserve it. No one did.

We finished up with Alcide and had returned the lobby; I was hasty to get out of here, when she placed her hand on my arm and exclaimed anxiously...

"Wait!"

"What?" I asked worriedly and she confessed...

"I have to get Dean!"

My brow furrowed in confusion and Sookie explained...

"It was Eve's stuffed toy collie, I saw it up on her bed before I collapsed, I promised her I would make sure her mother got it."

I instantly knew this was a bad idea. But I knew Sookie well enough to know when she made up her mind, there was no arguing, so I finally reasoned in an attempt to hide my frustration...

"Fine, you stay here, Ill get it."

"Eric I-"

"Ill get it!" I cut her off before she could argue not wanting her to do anything else strenuous today, especially returning to the place that caused her so much turmoil. So I left quickly and ran upstairs.

Ten minutes later after searching the room from top to bottom and questioning all of the nurses on duty, I could not find the damn thing. Perhaps they had already returned the toy to her parents, I thought hopefully. On my way back, I glanced in the gift shop but I didn't see anything that remotely resembled a stuffed toy collie and I returned to Sookie regrettably, empty handed.

Obviously she didn't take the news well despite my assurance that the hospital would return it to her parents. I knew Sookie felt somehow responsible for this whole thing even though I did not understand why. After going to the hospital administrator personally and asking that we be notified if this toy collie was found because it was very special to the family, we finally headed home.

Sookie remained silent in the car and went straight to bed when we got home. It was clear she was angry and I didn't know what to tell her to make her feel better. I just wanted to hold her and tell her how thankful I was to have her and the baby, but she had built her walls back up, refusing to let even me in.

It was so complicated. On one hand, I couldn't believe this happened. I think I was still in shock. This morning everything was looking bright, we were engaged now, I was about to take the plunge, something 3 months ago I didn't ever think would happen. The name Eve wouldn't have caused me to blink twice, but now she was all I could think about. That fucker Bill ruined her life and her family forever. Only what was so twisted was the fact that I knew she could save Fintan's life, so part of me felt hopeful too. You see what I mean about complicated? I was driving myself crazy between grief, joy, and worry.

Thankfully my melancholia broke when I got a call from Adele later that evening. I felt horrible all over again because in all of my own drama I had forgotten to check in on Fintan. We had been jumping from one chaotic situation to the next no chance to stop for air even. Adele of course was concerned about her granddaughter and I explained to her what had happened with Sookie. She was grateful I took her home. She told me Fintan was out of surgery and now they had to wait 24 hours to find out if the transplant worked. I thanked her for staying there with him and she told me she was looking forward to our next family dinner when we could put all of this behind us and celebrate what good came out of it.

_"You are her world Eric, I think she blames herself for that poor child, I have no idea why but whatever is going on inside that head of hers, she's got to work it out herself."_

I nodded suspecting as much and thanked her for calling realizing I was too tired to think any more I decided to make something to eat, even though I wasn't very hungry and brought the other half of my sandwich upstairs for Sookie. She had to eat. I was almost certain she only had breakfast today and that was it.

The room was black when I got there, the light from the hallway illuminated parts and I saw Sookie's small body laying in the shadows on the bed with her back turned to me.

It was hard to tell if she was asleep or awake she was so still, unsure if she would be hungry right now and I set the plate on the nightstand. She still looked so fragile and small, and I wasn't sure what I could say to offer her the comfort she needed. Still I knew she needed something. I couldn't just leave her alone, even if I was at a loss for what to do.

"Sookie?"

"Are you awake?" I whispered but she didn't stir. I pulled off my shirt and pants figuring I should join her and lifted the covers carefully and slid in next to her. I thought about letting her have her space but my desire to connect to her was that much higher and I wrapped my arms around her from behind. That's when I heard the sniffle and knew she had to be awake. I closed my eyes and kissed her softly on the back of her neck, knowing a kiss wouldn't solve her problems but it could remind her that she was loved and supported.

She spun around and buried her damp face in my chest. Her reaction surprised me but kept my own dismay concealed knowing she needed me to be there for her right now, so be there I would. I placed my arms around her small trembling frame and began to stroke my fingers through her hair in an attempt to sooth her while whispering sweet nothings in her ear like _"it will be okay...I promise...I'll make it better_." I hated to see her in so much agony because I could feel her agony too, as if it was my own, but the other part of me was relieved she was letting me hold her. I never wanted to let her go. I stroked my fingers along the exposed skin of her back and we just lay there like that for a long while. I eventually spoke breaking the deafening silence in an attempt to give her something positive.

"Fintan may have a good chance at recovery, they won't know until tomorrow if it was successful but he is resting now and that is a good sign."

I glanced down at her through tortured eyes wondering if it was insensitive for me to bring up the Fintan thing given that it was Eve's death, which saved him but I figured she had a right to know.

I closed my eyes for a minute met with more quiet. I leaned in and kissed the top of her head tenderly unsure of what else to say, wondering if I could get her to talk about it. I moved in closer kissing her temple this time and allowed my heart to speak as my fingers brushed over her skin.

"I was afraid I was going to lose you today or that we could lose the baby, it made me realize where my priorities should be." I confessed softly. Her breathing hitched and I knew she was listening so I continued...

"I know it's hard to think about Eve after…"

"It's unbearable." Sookie answered icily, her voice filled with contempt and I pressed my cheek to her ear in an attempt to provide her with some of my warmth. I chose my words carefully thinking perhaps we could try to talk about this but before I could say anything Sookie growled lowly….

"I don't know how a loving God could ever allow something like this to happen."

"It is unfair." I agreed and she shook her head her whole body going rigidly hard with anger and she concluded glaring at me with a fury hidden behind her soft eyes…

"As far as I'm concerned there is no God."

I watched her for a moment in dismay that my Sookie would say such a thing. This wasn't like her.

"You don't mean that." I answered surprised by her words, trying to remain calm. I knew how important Sookie's faith was to her but she kept going…

"I prayed for her, I did everything in my power and still he was merciless, well I refuse to acknowledge that kind of a God, I refuse to believe in that bullshit anymore."

You're angry, that's understandable." I reasoned gently.

But she simply glared into the dark. I could practically see steam coming out of her ears, sure she didn't mean it, yet I had never seen her so livid. She felt like a bomb about to go off she was so tense with pressure. She shook her head and replied.

"God can go fuck himself in hell for all I care, and should any one ever try to hurt me or my family like that ever again, I promise you Ill make sure they burn in hell too."

I was beginning to think she might not be kidding the way her hands gripped my sides causing my flesh to bruise. Her arms proving some super human strength as she clenched me tightly refusing to let go.

I confess I didn't really know what to do or say at that point hoping that was the anger talking I replied.

"I wouldn't let anyone hurt you either."

Although at this point I felt that my words had fallen on deaf ears. In an attempt to divert Sookie from her murderous 'lets send everyone to hell' fantasy, I leaned in, ran my hands through her hair in a soothing manner then kissed her forehead. She closed her eyes and pressed her cheek against my chest once more to my relief. I allowed her a few moments to rest her tired and aching head. I knew she was stressed, I knew she was in pain. I glanced over at the plate on the nightstand, remembering that eating was something she should probably do and I finally remarked after a few long pauses.

"I made you a sandwich."

She pulled the covers up over us signaling that she wanted to sleep now. Perhaps now wasn't the right time, so I concluded...

"It's on the nightstand incase you get hungry."

I felt her lashes flutter and the warm heat of her tears dampen my flesh, able to admit now that I was worried about her. Especially because of her apparent torment and the way I felt so helpless to stop it. Looking down I realized she still had her clothing on. I knew had Sookie been in her right mind she wouldn't want to fall asleep in her clothes so I helped her take off her skirt by unzipping the side, and then her top. She groggily lifted her arms as I slipped it off over her head her bra and panties remaining and then she lay back down in my arms and clung to me, reminding me of a small child who was trying to get back to sleep after her horrible nightmare.

I realized when she buried her head in my chest again that Adele was right, Sookie would have to come to terms with this in her own time.

xxx

I was in the middle of fighting off a massive tiger just as Sookie had gone into labor in the midst of a huge traditional New Orleans funeral procession that had just strummed up 'When the Saints go Marching In,' when I felt a hot breath on my neck. My eyes flashed open breaking my cold sweat as I found Sookie here and not delivering our child right now in the midst of 20 trombones, with a tiger threatening our safety. I smiled in groggy relief knowing it was just a bad/crazy dream when she nuzzled her nose into my neck. I pulled her closer, our bodies having moved during the night and she shifted her body to lay against mine.

I inhaled her heavenly scent nuzzling my nose into her neck and that's when she turned again this time her lips brushing mine. My skin lit up like it was on fire, my lips meeting hers in answer as if it was a dream, a much better dream. She wrapped her arms around me and our lips touched once more, this time connecting in union. My libido began to spark as my hand ran flat along her back and we started to test the waters of this new better dream.

She dove her tongue into my mouth hotly and I slid mine against hers wantonly. Suspended between a fantasy and consciousness I found myself addicted to her touch. If this was a dream I never wanted to wake up, I thought. My pulse rate quickened, and then when she dove her hands in my boxer briefs and began to massage me. My eyes shot open as pleasure rained through my body awakening my hard arousal.

_Fuck she felt good._ I inhaled her mouth her hand rousing me, and felt myself go rigid against her palm. _Jesus!_ I found myself craving the sweet release. I felt her hands tug at my boxer briefs yanking them down causing the cold air to hit my skin. Every square inch electrified and she pulled away for a minute. I didn't want her lips to leave mine or her hands to stop because I was addicted to her, I had to have her. She crawled over me and used her hands to guide my hardness inside her.

My fantasy brought to life, I stiffened wanting to have her even more now than before and she came back down to kiss me when where we were and what we were doing right now finally hit me.

"Sookie!"

She lowered herself still lucid as all the silent alarms went off inside me and I met her gaze in fear and yanked back.

"We can't...we can't hurt you or the baby."

I explained and the color drained from her face. I definitely did not want to put that look there and as she recoiled I tried to pull her back to me.

"I'm sorry...I..."

"It's okay." She finally spoke with raspy voice her gaze flicking guiltily with mine for a second as she stood over the bed in her bra and panties.

"I'm sorry." She muttered and went to find her clothes.

I yanked my boxer brief's back up wanting to make amends and I shot out of bed and took her shoulders from behind in my hands. Kissing the back of her neck in an attempt to rekindle our earlier connection because I thought possibly together we could find a way out of this mess, I replied softly with a devilish smirk...

"We can't have intercourse but I'm sure there are plenty of other things we could do."

I trailed my finger over the intricate artery on her neck and I mused going in to press my lips to her warm and soft skin...

"I'm certainly not lacking in the creativity department, if you would allow me the honor of pleasuring you?"

I saw her lashes flutter but then her body tensed, she swallowed and turned around to face me remarking...

"I don't think we should do that right now Eric, but I appreciate the thought."

I frowned watching her carefully and she walked over to her wardrobe to take out a pair of shorts and a Merlottes tee. At first wondering why she was putting on her work uniform. And then I realized what she was doing.

"What are you doing?" I asked in shock wondering if she was seriously getting ready for work right now after what just happened yesterday.

She shook her head and explained...

"I told Sam Id pick up a shift, but thought I could swing by the hospital first to see Fintan. Would you mind giving me a ride?"

"You aren't going to work." I countered stiffly and she reasoned with a flinch...

"I need something to keep me busy, something to keep my mind off-" Her voice trailed off and she concluded plainly as if it were the most obvious thing in the world...

"And Sam needs my help."

For the love of god this woman had seriously gone mad. I honestly didn't even know where to start.

"You are supposed to be taking it easy, after what happened we can't be too safe." I reasoned growing more and more agitated by her behavior.

"I feel fine." She answered in conclusion and went into the bathroom to wash up, get dressed, and ultimately shut me out.

I felt like throwing something at the wall when that door closed. I know she was going through some tough shit right now, we all were, but she wasn't the only one who her actions affected.

I saw the untouched sandwich on the table and begrudgingly shoved my legs into a pair of pants. Then I went straight for my phone and called Sam Merlotte.

xxxx

We got to the hospital and paid a visit to a very tired Fintan. The good news was that if he was doing well by this time tomorrow they could finally move him out of the ICU. Sookie was distant and she even made an excuse to leave the room for a bit. I knew when she was antsy, it was so much easier just to giver her a little space. I figured she'd go back to Eve's room and try to find that damn dog. Thankfully there were no ex boyfriend rapists on the premises so I felt assured that she would at least be safe in her searching.

She came back a little while later and this time Fintan was more alert.

He took Sookie's reluctant hand as she passed through and replied.

"I hear you knew the brave young lady who gave me my new kidneys."

I knew before the words came out of his mouth that, Sookie wasn't ready to talk about Eve yet. She had done everything possible this morning to prove to me that everything was normal. But when I saw her now, her face frozen in place, in an attempt to hide behind that wall she had built up, it was plain as day. I stepped in behind her to hold her shoulder with my hand.

"She was in a car accident yesterday."

I explained not wanting to get Sookie worked up any more than she had. I knew Adele hadn't told Fintan about what happened to Sookie yesterday to keep his own stress levels down.

Fintan nodded understanding and he put his other hand over Sookie's and confessed...

"The next time I look at the stars, I'm certain there will be a new one with her name on it. For someone so young to do something so brave and miraculous, she surely was a very special person."

Sookie's brow furrowed and I could tell if we weren't careful she could do something drastic, like try to murder Bill or something. Not that I hadn't thought of it myself or would entirely mind, but for Sookie's sake I didn't think it was a good idea to push that trigger right now. I leaned in wrapping my arm around her shoulders in an attempt to distract Sookie from the obvious. Only her grandmother had taken the inopportune moment to chime in as well.

"God wouldn't take such an angelic sweet little soul if she wasn't extremely important, and I just know she was. Most adults would not have been so brave." Adele replied in admiration.

Sookie tensed up under my hand and I knew based on our conversation last night that not much had changed in her mind. I knew I had to get her out of here for her own sake as well as mine before she said something she really regretted. I followed her blank stare towards the wall realizing she was melting down the clock with her gaze. So I concluded changing the subject...

"We are glad to know you are doing better Fintan, I'm afraid however I must get Sookie to work."

"You're going to work?" Adele croaked in surprise and Sookie nodded her head seemingly relieved by the subject change and pulled her purse back up around her shoulder.

"Sam needs my help today." She answered simply.

Adele glanced at me in disbelief but I subtly shook my head in a gesture for her to not press it and thankfully she took my lead.

"All right." Adele replied leerily and she went up to Sookie and kissed her cheek...

"But you better take it easy ya hear, or Sam Merlotte is gonna get an ear full from me."

Sookie smiled faintly once more and nodded her head and she assured her...

"I feel fine, great in fact considering..."

"Considering what Dearest?" Fintan asked still blissfully clueless and I offered...

"Considering she's almost 10 weeks pregnant." I concluded giving Sookie a pointed gaze in warning to not push it.

She walked over to Adele and gave her a hug and then Fintan second. I told Adele she should go home tonight and sleep in her own bed but she was determined to stay by Fintan's side. Much like her granddaughter, she had a stubborn streak, so I gave her a hug followed by Fintan and promised quietly that Id keep a close eye on Sookie.

We said our goodbyes and then I offered to take Sookie to work. She wanted to drive her own car, but I reasoned that she should try to limit her strenuous activity to merely waiting tables since that was such a relaxing job. Sookie didn't appreciate my sarcasm but she realized I wasn't budging on it and she finally compromised reluctantly.

Pulling up outside Merlottes, Sookie turned to me and attempted to give me a peck on the cheek, but I had moved to face her about to tell her to be careful when she wound up kissing the corner of my mouth, which strangely sent those familiar sparks running through me rekindling earlier memories of this morning.

Neither of us were sure what to do since we had obvious restraints and emotions flying under the surface at the moment so I told her softly as her eyes flicked with mine...

"Call me when you get done."

"I will." She answered with a sad smile and then she left the car. I watched the clock on my dashboard as she sauntered into Merlottes figuring Id give her 2 minutes.

She was out in three, fuming and furious as hell.

"You put him up to it didn't you?"

"Put him up to what?" I asked as she got in and slammed the door behind her.

"Sam won't let me work, he said he has too many waitresses today as is."

I glanced out the window obscuring a smug grin from her and I remarked...

"Well that's unfortunate...for you."

I watched her through the sides of my eyes and she shook her head...

"You are impossible!"

"I could say the same for someone else we both know."

She just glared out the window and folded her arms unwilling to budge...

"Thanks for robbing me of my one place to escape." Sookie growled angrily casting a dark murky glare at me.

I figured because I was already on her shit list, I didn't have much else to lose so I put my car in reverse and we left Merlottes.

Twenty four minutes and one very long silent treatment later we were parked outside a mini golf course.

Sookie appeared confused coming out of her festering trance she glanced around us realizing we were not at home and she asked me...

"Why did we stop? What are you doing now?"

I took the keys out of the ignition got out of the car and confessed...

"I always wanted to try this place out."

She furrowed her brow in a manner that told me I was not one of her favorite people right now and she shook her head insisting...

"I want to go home."

I shut my door walked around to her side of the car opening her door I offered her my hand and insisted...

"Humor me."

I knew the second we went home Id be in for round two of the festering silent treatment. I had been through this too, but I knew moping did nothing but waste time so I waited for her patiently and offered...

"It's just one little course, and I promise either way win or lose, Ill buy you ice cream after wards."

"I'm not hungry." She snapped and I pursed my lips losing my patience. In an effort to try a new tactic, plain old honesty, I confessed in earnest...

"Sookie, I'm trying to give you a distraction here."

She closed her eyes and sighed, reluctantly she gave me her hand and I helped to pull her out. I knew I had to get her out of this funk, if not for Sookie, for our baby. There was too much at stake now.

I took her hand and we walked up to the booth where the attendant sized us up and handed us both clubs. I took an extra long club while Sookie was fitted with a medium and then he asked us to take a ball.

I chose a powder blue and Sookie took a fuchsia colored ball. She was about to grab a score sheet and a pencil when I remarked trying to be thoughtful to take the added pressure off her...

"It's okay, we don't need that."

She glanced at me quizzically and then for the sake of being a pain in my ass she took it anyway and wrote down both our names.

I raised my brows not going to argue with her. If it made her happy to make it a little competitive so be it, I thought stepping past her and to the first hole which turned out to run under a huge massive alligator stature.

"Ladies first." I offered smugly gesturing with my hand.

She eyed me suspiciously, dropped her ball and then made her move.

She shot it under the gator in her first swing and wound up about 3 feet from the hole.

"Nice move." I complimented her but she just stood there and waited for me to make my move.

I set down my ball and hit it under the statue, which shot the ball through landing about 12 inches from the hole.

She was dead serious though the expression on her face unwavering and with a little concentration she hit the ball into the hole with 2 strokes.

I followed suit and mused as she diligently wrote down our scores.

"Looks like this might be an interesting match after all."

"After all?" She asked acidly, cocking her head.

"Is that why you didn't want to use the score cards? You pitied me and thought beating me was a sure thing?" Sookie questioned baiting me. And what tempting bait she was, I thought with a smirk, thinking a little antagonism was just what she needed I admitted...

"Of course...I could lick your ass with this game any day of the week."

With one brow raised she shoved the scorecard and pencil into my chest to keep her hands free and she insisted tossing her ball down in front of the next hole which had a long run followed by a hill remarking with a new spark in challenge...

"You're on!"

She followed through by whacking her ball over the pond and straight into the next hole.

I couldn't deny that she turned me on, just a little. But one look from her and I knew my game had to be on today. Sookie would expect no less, so I shoved the score card in my pocket, set my ball down, and showed her what a putt really looked like.

By the time we finished, I realized festering really did have its advantages because Sookie was the most driven golfer I had ever seen. She would have put a professional to shame. We finished out with Sookie clocking out at 21 points to a 16 hole course, and I had 30.

"Perhaps we should think about getting you a coach." I replied and she met my gaze with raised brows...

"Afraid I might make you lick your own ass." She mused and I admitted my smirk returning...

"No, but I still wouldn't mind licking yours."

She flipped her eyes up and she remarked with a smirk...

"I should know better not to encourage you."

"Yes you really should." I answered smartly and she bumped into me on purpose. I took her hand in mine and we walked over to the ice cream shop across the street.

I was well aware Sookie had not eaten anything today. In my opinion, two bites of toast for breakfast did not really count and even though ice cream wasn't really the healthiest of foods, she needed something. At least it had one of the food groups, which had to count for something right?

So we went inside and Sookie looked at me curiously and she asked me as I studied the menu of flavors...

"What are you getting?"

"I don't know, what are you getting?" I asked her teasingly wondering if she was trying to get out of ordering something and Sookie shook her head...

"I'm not sure if I'm hungry enough for a whole cone."

As I suspected, she was doing it again. I pursed my lips and went up to the counter and replied to the attendant...

"Ill take the banana split, one strawberry scoop, one butter pecan, and one rocky road with all of the trimmings."

Her mouth fell agape in surprise and I concluded with a smirk...

"Don't look so shocked, you are helping me eat it."

She rose a brow and I took the dish from the attendant and paid him for it. We brought it over to a table and I handed Sookie a spoon.

"Bon Appétit!" I remarked dunking my spoon into the strawberry ice cream covered in chocolate.

She smirked again and then took a timid swipe of the butter pecan with caramel sauce and whipped cream. She placed the ice cream in her mouth delicately and I took another scoop. This time taking some banana with the rocky road and I remarked.

"I think after we're done here we should go to the Sizzler and get the all you can eat buffet."

Sookie actually laughed out loud for the first time since her accident yesterday and it was pure music to my ears. I wanted to hear that again and again and I added...

"Well in Sweden it's good luck to have a big fat bouncing baby, so I want to make sure we are very lucky."

"Is that so?" She replied with mock intrigue to my bluff as she swiped some of the strawberry and I leaned in and nodded my head.

"Well if you don't believe me you will just have to see it for yourself."

She smirked and sat up a little straighter and she asked me curiously...

"You mean you want to take me to Sweden?"

She blinked and glanced out the window as if puzzled by the very concept of going there and I remarked...

"Do you have interest in going there?"

She glanced at me and shook her head with creased brow in confusion and replied...

"I just never thought Id ever leave Louisiana...The idea of leaving the country is a little overwhelming"

I nodded my head trying to let her absorb it. I didn't want to reveal my disappointment if she was not open to going to visit my hometown and I admitted...

"It's just an idea, nothing to worry about right now."

Sookie blinked again and shook her head remarking as if in disbelief...

"No it's just a lot to wrap my brain around. So if we went I could get a passport and everything? And could I get stamps in it? But they probably don't let pregnant women fly do they?"

I smirked realizing then just how small and sheltered a world this woman came from. She both puzzled me and bewitched me, and I remarked...

"First off yes you can get a passport and you can get a stamp at the airport but they don't stamp them anymore when you are traveling country to country unless you ask for it and yes pregnant women can fly, I know they can't much later into the pregnancy but we have plenty of time before March."

She smiled and asked me.

"So we could see where you grew up and where you went to school and had your first communion...all of that?"

I nodded my head trying not to react to the communion remark and tip my hand, noting her slip of words.

"We could go to Oxford to see Fintan's old stomping grounds as well, and anywhere else you might want to travel."

Her grin was lopsided and she looked as if her head was spinning and she finally remarked brightly...

"It sounds amazing."

"It will be, because we would experience it together."

She bit her lip and I took her hand feeling hope once more. For a minute I almost forgot how this morning began fantasizing about this vacation myself, when I looked down realizing our ice cream was starting to melt and then I remarked...

"You better help me eat this before we end up wading through a milkshake lake."

Sookie laughed to my delight and then she took the cherry that was now submerged in both ice cream and cool whip and plunged it into her mouth.

xxx

We were on a roll with our little mini escape, so I talked Sookie into seeing a flick at the Shreveport Independent film house. After choosing from an array of possible films we finally settled on 'Girl With the Dragon Tattoo', which suited me just fine. It amused me to watch Sookie though. I think this was in fact her first foreign film, not foreign to me of course but for Sookie it was, not to mention first Swedish foreign film and they certainly did not shy away from subjects such as sex and nudity like typical American films. It was one thing that always shocked me because it was okay to see some poor guys head get blown off but show a little pubic hair and you had people covering their faces in shock and dismay. Including my darling fiancée.

But in the end it turned out she enjoyed it just as much as I did. The books had been hugely popular in Sweden for a few years and I was happy to see it become a success internationally too.

"You probably had this planned all along didn't you?"

Sookie asked me with a smirk some time around dusk as we got out of the car and headed towards the house.

I tried to pretend I didn't know what she was talking about although admittedly the afternoon was a nice diversion and I think we both had fun which seamed like a virtually impossible concept last night. I creased my brows in mock confusion and asked her while placing my jacket over her shoulders because it was getting chilly...

"Planned what exactly?"

She folded her arms, turned to me and narrowed her gaze in an attempt to gage my sincerity and she remarked...

"Taking the day off, getting Sam to find someone else to cover for me, getting me to go with you to play mini golf, for ice cream, and a movie..."

I smirked and as we stepped up to the porch and I mused while jiggling the keys in the front door asking her coyly.

"You think I planned all that?"

She leaned her back against the side panel with arms still crossed and she answered with a smug grin...

"Oh I know you did."

I raised a brow and scanned her up and down. She looked so cute right now so sure of herself in her little Merlottes uniform and my leather jacket. My brain finally said 'to hell with it' and I went in for a deep kiss smothering my mouth over hers.

She gasped under my kiss a cloud of emotions coming out from underneath as I backed her up against the house and we locked lips passionately. I confess I had been wanting to do this all day, ever since this morning. This going back and forth was driving my libido crazy. I wondered if I couldn't persuade Sookie to let me make her dinner and then we could resume our earlier activities. I meant what I said before there was still plenty we could do without having actual intercourse and I was more than willing to explore every avenue with her. But before I could ask her if we should take it inside I heard my phone ring.

I went to grab it realizing my phone was in my jacket pocket, which Sookie was now wearing and she glanced at me lucidly, slipped her hand inside the pocket and glanced at the caller id.

"It's Pam." She replied smugly and she answered it playfully turning the phone on speaker...

"Hi Pam."

_"Oh good you aren't dead, I guess I can finally rest easy now."_

Sookie raised her brows and she mused...

"No I'm not dead, at least the last time I checked."

_"Would it kill you to bestow me a little courtesy and tell me when you collapse in the middle of a hospital? My boyfriend who will be sleeping in the dog house once I get back from my conference in Las Vegas just informed me this afternoon that you started to hemorrhage. Is that true?"_

Sookie met my gaze leerily and I replied for her...

"She's alright now Pam it was most likely a subchorionic hemorrhage. We didn't want to worry you." I lied and I could hear her roll her eyes from the other end of the phone.

"I'm fine really." Sookie answered in an attempt to assure her and Pam replied sharply...

_"You should have a box of flowers coming soon, they are from me. I'm glad you're both still alive but next time you let something like this get swept under the rug I might not be so nice."_

"Understood." I concluded with a smirk to Sookie knowing Pam was just being a hard ass because she cared and Sookie concluded...

"Have fun in Las Vegas Pam."

_"Hmmf." _

And then the line went dead. Sookie smirked at me that fire behind her eyes and I leaned into her once more and asked taunting her...

"Now where were we?"

My phone went off again and we both figured it was Pam calling to apologize for her rudeness.

"Ill get it." Sookie answered enjoying the cat and mouse game we had going and she answered...

"Do you want me to toss Alcide a bone for your troubles?"

I had to admit that was funny and I leaned in to kiss her cheek and neck...

"Oh. No we haven't." Sookie replied her body stiffening and I moved my head closer to hear what was being said.

_"We can purchase you a new one if you can give us the description?"_

Her hand fell from her ear and I took the phone from her...

"Who is it?" I asked but Sookie's brows were all furrowed and she muttered...

"The hospital Administrator—"

I silently cursed myself for letting Sookie answer my phone just now but there was nothing that could be done at this point.

"Hi this is Eric Northman." I answered as Sookie turned around and went into the house with her head hung low...

_"Hello Mr. Northman...I just told your wife that we couldn't find the toy...The St. Clair's were by earlier but they left in such a hurry I thought I would check with you to see if you had any luck finding it. I'm assuming you haven't because they still wouldn't be looking for it, if it wasn't so important. Since you know them would you like us to replace it?"_

My gaze followed Sookie back into the darkened house and I knew this was most likely a toy that could not be replaced, much like the daughter they lost and I remarked solemnly...

"No...no but thank you for calling."

_"Certainly sir, I will let them know if it turns up, we are so sorry..."_

But I clicked off my phone before she could say anything else. I was more worried about Sookie right now. I shoved my phone into my pocket and pushed the door open. Sookie was sitting on the couch with her head in her hands now visibly upset.

"Sookie?" I asked treading carefully because I knew how badly she needed to be at peace right now and not tormented. I approached her and put my arm on her shoulder but she jerked it off and cried...

"I'm such a terrible person. How could I be off joyriding around town when her family is suffering."

I sat down next to her trying to remain calm and I explained...

"You weren't joyriding around town, you were taking a day away from the stress...I know if Eve were still alive she would have wanted..."

"I'm not supposed to be having fun!" Sookie argued cutting me off and stood up abruptly.

"God, I feel so...so disgusting...I should...I should be the one to burn in hell!" She proclaimed while her eyes began to cloud up.

I got up this time angry because she was talking about the woman I loved...

"You didn't do anything wrong!"

"I promised her I would get that dog to her mother and I failed her, it was her one wish...If I can't even fulfill a little girls last dying request what good am I?"

I felt like shaking sense into her she was so frustrating.

"You stayed at that hospital all day, you prayed for her, you consoled her and her parents, you did everything humanly possible to help."

"But not the one thing that mattered." She argued.

I knew I was fighting a hopeless battle and I reasoned...

"I know you blame yourself, I don't understand why, maybe because you feel responsible for Bill but..."

She clenched her hands and turned away from me still agonizing...

"If I hadn't!"

"If you hadn't what?" I asked her fearing what she was going to say before she said it.

Her tortured eyes met mine and I growled...

"If you hadn't left Bill is that what you wanted to say?"

Her nostrils flared in stubborn affirmation giving me all the confirmation I needed...

"He drank heavily because of me, because I left him, I saw him at Merlottes plenty of times downing bottles of bourbon and I never paused to stop him..." Sookie admitted.

"He drank because he was a pathetic loser and couldn't get over the fact that he couldn't control you. You aren't his mother, you aren't responsible for him." I argued.

"He tried to make amends..." She reasoned.

"To get closer to you." I countered.

She glanced down at her hands sadly and I remarked with disbelief shaking my head in confusion...

"You're not even going to let him take the blame for her? When he was the one behind that wheel, you're going to suffer for Bill this time too?"

Her pain filled eyes met mine and I sneered growing angrier by the second.

"Give him a little credit Sookie. He raped you and then he murdered this little girl because he was too irresponsible to walk home instead of getting behind the wheel. Are you going to blame yourself for Eve too? Like you blamed yourself for his rape?"

"Eric." She objected visibly upset, but I wasn't done or about to let her have the floor back.

I couldn't believe after all we had been through it would still come back to that fuck wad Bill Compton. I wished with the strength of a thousand suns that I had killed him when I had the chance. But then I realized I would have neither Sookie nor Fintan right now and I concluded stiffly...

"You can hate yourself all you want but I will not. Bill is a deutschebag who will never accept responsibility for the pain he has inflicted on everyone else but him. He may try to fool you into thinking he is sorry, but it's about him. I can assure you even now he probably is not thinking about that little girls family, he's probably not thinking about how he has now changed their lives forever. He's thinking about himself, how he fucked up with you, and wondering why this happened to him. I don't regret what happened to Bill. If it were up to me Id make sure he was put away for a very long time. I don't even regret what happened to Eve."

She looked up at me her face white with shock but I didn't care, explaining...

"I'm sorry and sad she's dead, it was a horrible tragedy, but she gave Fintan a second chance and she made you tell that ass hat off once and for all. We all have to make sacrifices Sookie, some are greater than others, but it's also part of our humanity. If we didn't there would be nothing in this world worth living for. That's something Bill could never understand. If Godric hadn't died I would have never met you. You think I don't understand what you're going through? I didn't think Godric's death was unfair? You think I didn't agonize every goddamn night for months after my best friend killed himself? You think it didn't hurt? It's sacrifice. A part of life, but I also know we can't let it consume us because if we do, it's all in vain. It's all for nothing."

"Ironically, you taught me that."

She took in a few puffs of air stunned into silence, but since I was on a roll I continued facing her head on...

"You have a baby to think about now. A life that absorbs everything you put in your body and everything you don't. When you don't eat breakfast neither does our child, when you can't sleep, it stays restless with you. A life that feels every emotion, every tear, a life you hold in your hands. So as much as I know you are grieving for Eve right now, and blame yourself in some twisted way for what happened with Bill Compton, you have to suck it up. For our baby! For me!"

She flinched and I hoped I had not just encouraged another round of tears but truthfully, it needed to be said. I could admit that her hemorrhage yesterday scared me enough to put the fear of God back into that woman. She had to take care of herself now, she had to take care of our child. This wasn't about Eve or Bill it was about Sookie.

"Do you understand what I'm saying?" I asked her finally although it was clear she was still in shock, her watery eyes glaring at me.

"You think I don't care about our baby?" She finally asked hurt with shaky breath and I hesitated for a moment, worried she was too fragile to tear that wall down right now and I admitted...

"I think you have had a lot on your mind lately."

She sniffled and then she crumpled into a heap on the couch and began to cry. I melted rushing to her side.

"Sookie? I didn't mean you are a bad mother, you are going to be a wonderful mother, I just meant you cant keep doing this to yourself, punishing and beating yourself up like this, I cant watch you do that."

I placed my hand on her shaking shoulders and she gasped...

"I just want to be alone right now, please just go away?"

"Sookie, I'm sorry." I didn't want to fight or hurt her but she declared in warning...

"I need to be alone right now!"

I met her gaze in defeat wondering if I had been insensitive just now. She had the right to mourn the girl, we all should be given that right, I didn't want to take it away from her but I didn't want her punishing herself anymore. That was unacceptable.

I waited for her tormented gaze to meet mine and I finally nodded my head wanting to give her what she wanted.

"You know where to find me."

She gave one nod unable to meet my gaze again and then I had no choice. It was clear Sookie needed her space and I had just given her a mouthful to ponder, so I left.


	34. Chapter 34

**AN: **Thanks for your patience everyone. I hope the wait was worth it. And as I told some of you who left reviews, I really felt bad for Sookie in the last chapter because she got cut off before she got the floor and it looked like she was going to do her Sookie thing again, so now she gets to say her piece. Ive always felt that Sookie means well but she often doesnt know how to react to things. Shes a react first think later kind of girl, so now shes done some thinking. ;) Hope it satisfies. And sorry it took me a little longer to get this one out. I guess its always a bad idea to let me hang onto my chapters longer because I am prone to keep editing/tweeking. Im sure I could still tweek this one, but Im going to let it go. We are almost done now. One more chapter left. So thanks again to all of you for reading and reviewing. Hope you stay tuned for the stories conclusion! xoxo

**Chapter 34-Hide and Seek, Part 2**

_EPOV_

I thought momentarily about calling Pam but realized the only one who could really deal with Sookie now was Sookie. She didn't take pressure well nor did she want to lose her control. I knew enough about her to know that it was best to give her space. I made a chicken and vegetable soup. She still hadn't come in when I was done so I left the pot on the stove, hoping she would help herself.

I went upstairs to our bedroom and turned on my laptop to catch up on email and go over Freyja's business expenses and profits for the month, only it was hard to concentrate with everything that had been going on lately.

I found my mind wandering again to Sookie hoping she would be okay. This whole week had been like a hurricane that came through and ripped our lives apart. I knew it was a lot to absorb, but how much could one person really take? I knew I was almost at my breaking point last week. I decided to take a shower in an attempt to clear my head but was unable to get my mind off her. I was about to go down and check on Sookie when I saw the light click off downstairs.

I didn't want her to think I was sitting up here waiting to pounce on her like some anxious parent, so I stripped down to my boxer briefs clicked off the lights except one small bed stand lamp for her and then got into bed.

Less than a minute later the door creaked open and I heard Sookie pad across the floor into the bathroom to wash up. She was in the shower for what felt like an eternity, and I only hoped when she came out she would join me in the bed and not find refuge in the other guest bedroom instead.

The bathroom door finally opened and I pretended to be asleep.

Sookie got in a few moments later and to my dismay she slid her arm around me.

"Hey." I turned around pretending to be groggy, curious if the shower did as little for her as it did for me.

"Hey." She answered shyly and I questioned feeling guilty for my earlier lecture now that she was here with me…

"Are you...okay?" I asked her hesitant needing to prepare myself if I was in for another round of 'I hate myself' and my gaze met hers.

"I'm sorry Eric."

She paused and her eyes flickered to mine with regret and then she confessed. "This is hard."

I still wasn't quite sure how to react and I watched her in an attempt to gage her current state of emotion at the moment.

"You don't have to apologize." I answered knowing she was just going through the grieving process in her own way. I always wanted her to be honest with me, even if I didn't want to hear it and so far, she had done that.

"Yes I do." Sookie answered as her gaze lifted to meet mine. Her eyes tore into me and then she smoothed her fingers through my hair and confessed…

"You were just doing what you always do, trying to protect me." She admitted. I couldn't deny that much and Sookie continued.

"There's something Id like to tell you." Her gaze met mine sincerely and there was no other answer but…

"Of course—Always."

Sookie blinked and then gave me a brief nod before she laid it all out on the table. She took a deep breath.

"I don't know if this will make any sense, but I think it would be best if I started from the beginning."

I nodded my head desiring to hear whatever it was she wanted to say and then she began.

"For most of my life I was on my own. I mean I always had my Gran, but it's different with someone like me who doesn't easily make friends. I was the shy girl in school and Jason was the popular one. "

She took another breath and I held her hand in mine wanting her to know she had my undivided attention because I could tell this was hard for her then she started again.

"After our parents died, I just shut down and became numb inside. Gran tried to get me to come out of my shell, Tara too, but I just thought it was easier to block out the pain of life. If I could store it far back in some dark corner of my mind where I could lock it up and toss away the key and never think of it again it wouldn't hurt me anymore."

"That's how I protected myself all those years with my uncle...I didn't see the point in fighting something I could never change, so I decided to keep it to myself…I guess I tried to do the same with Bill...it made things easier for me, to pretend it was just some stupid nightmare...To keep my distance from it all."

"I tried to make my Gran's life as easy as possible and I didn't want to trouble her with my problems. I wanted to take the high road and try to find some happiness for myself to prove to her how well she had raised me. My Gran encouraged me to find someone to share my time with and I worked up the courage to open my heart again. When Bill told me he loved me I felt I owed it to him to stay committed to him. Despite it all, I never thought it possible that someone could love me, that geeky shy little blonde girl who hid out in her bedroom reading books instead of going to the school dances."

"I thought at first it was normal, I deserved it, I deserved to be punished because I had cheated on Bill with you. And I did cheat. But I didn't have the same feelings for Bill that I had for you. You made me feel alive."

She smiled faintly and continued..."I know now that I didn't love him. You were the one I loved and then when I found out that you could be taken away to prison it tore me apart. I knew we had something special. But it felt almost too good to be true, I wasn't used to being loved so unconditionally and then I found out I was pregnant, I certainly didn't think I was ready to be a mother with all my problems, with everything we had already been through, it was so overwhelming..."

I blinked wondering where this was going but my eyes never left her.

"But, then Eve happened."

Her eyes locked with mine sadly and she confessed...

"I know it seems crazy, but the only way I can explain it to you is that I think Eve was me."

I met her gaze in confusion unsure of what she meant by this and she explained...

"I mean she was like me, she reminded me of myself before my parents died, before my uncle, before that dark cloud hung over my life and made me hard. She was so young and full of life and energy. When Bill hurt her, it finally hit me how much damage he had really done."

She began to grow emotional and I wanted to reach out to her and tell her it was okay, when she continued.

"I did blame myself...I feel like I could have prevented what happened to her, what happened to me if I had said something all those years ago, if I had spoken up, she might not be gone and I could have saved myself and everyone else, a lot of emotional pain and heartache, if I had only been stronger and more courageous."

A long tear ran down her cheek and I pulled her closer to me finally professing...

"Sookie, you did what you had to, to survive...No one blames you for Eve and you shouldn't blame yourself either, you were just a child when...Your Uncle, and even Bill, they took your innocence away from you robbing you of that chance to grow and learn to love and be loved as any young woman should. They took it, not you!"

It still infuriated me even after everything to know I was not even a kilometer away when all that was going on with Bill. Trying not to give into the anger I continued.

"You-" But she cut me off not finished yet...

"I was so scared, when Eve died I felt that numbness again fighting to come back, it would have been so easy to let myself slip back into it. I'm ashamed of myself for neglecting you, and Fintan when he could have died, and not being there for my Gran when she needed me the most, but most of all letting our baby down after all we had been through together. When that woman told me they hadn't yet found the dog, a dread came over me. I felt like if I couldn't at least find that dog I didn't deserve any of it, you, our baby, a happy ending, because you didn't deserve a failure like me. I had lived so long just with those painful hateful thoughts locked away deep inside me, they all came tumbling out at once and I panicked."

She met my gaze with blotchy eyes it all starting to make sense to me now and I confessed with a creased brow, her words tugging at my heartstrings...

"You deserve it all because you have earned it. You are a survivor Sookie and no matter what happens, I will always think you are an incredibly strong, courageous, and determined woman. To lift yourself back up the way you did, to care for others and look out for your Grandmother, it's unbelievable. We all have set backs, we all fall under the pressure sometimes, that's what makes us human. What happened to you in the past is just that, it's in the past. I know you are worried it could come back again, but it wont this time, because you are stronger now. You aren't that scared little girl any more; you are a grown woman and have learned much through all of your hardships, which is what makes you who you are, so special. You were born to be this child's mother. I only hope I can measure up to you when my time comes to face our baby."

"I think you are doing just fine on your own." Sookie confessed softly.

I met her gaze with heartfelt eyes hoping she was right and added…

"And you aren't hard, you had to grow up a lot faster due to what happened, but the point is, you took the high road, you chose to rise above it all and tried to move on. I don't blame you for that, I respect you. It proves just how giving, caring, and selfless a person you really are, and it's why I love you."

"You were the first real selfish thing I did for myself." Sookie admitted.

"Then my evil plan worked." I remarked with a smirk.

Taking my hand she moved it down lifting up her nightgown and she placed my palm flat on her abdomen and added quietly brushing her fingers over mine...

"We made this together."

I glanced down at the soft skin of her navel and Sookie concluded.

"If I find out I am at risk tomorrow and I have to take a leave of absence from work to ensure a safe pregnancy, I will. I don't ever want to see any harm come to her."

I raised my brows, surprised she could admit that she would take a break from work, but that wasn't the most astonishing part. My face fell in disbelief and I asked Sookie in clarification to make sure I heard her right.

"Her?"

That little Mona Lisa smile crept across her face and she watched me with that twinkle in her eyes, finally nodding her head, she admitted...

"It's just a hunch."

I smirked unsure whether or not a hunch would stand up to medical analysis, but if it was a girl, I knew Id give her the world on a platter. I smiled back at her and she leaned in to give me a warm tender kiss that instantly shattered all the earlier tension I was feeling. She sent jolts of heat through my body as her lips meshed with mine and I kept my palm pressed flat against her small baby bump. That life growing inside her was a token of our love, a part of me combined with a part of her. I felt more connected to Sookie and our daughter or son than I ever had in that moment, excited to meet this child, my child, our child. I was truthfully unable to compare this feeling of love and embarking on the total unknown with any other feeling on earth. Words couldn't describe how amazing it felt. Finally after we had thoroughly used up each others air supply, I pulled back and asked her in jest…

"Does that hunch say if we will go to Sweden any time in the near future?"

She chuckled lightly, and placed her hand over mine and answered softly...

"If we can get there before I turn into Shamu, then yes, Id love to."

I kissed her back and wrapped my arms around her once more exclaiming...

"I'm not worried in the slightest."

Going in for another kiss, she pulled back and met my glance with a raised brow and then she admitted with a slight nod...

"Okay."

Leaning in to resume our kiss, my lips brushed hers, and hers mine, and then she murmured against my mouth...

"But just a tip, next time you pretend to not be worried, make sure you turn off the lights and jump into bed before I come back up stairs."

My cheeks grew warm this time realizing she had caught me and I met her gaze with a devilish smirk.

xxxxx

By Thursday morning I was seriously going through Sookie withdrawal. I actually got up and took another cold shower before she woke because I didn't want her to see me relieve myself in bed. Only a few short more hours until her doctor appointment. If Alcide didn't give her the all clear I thought I would strangle him, but then I remembered Pam could probably do the job for us.

Sookie was still out and I thought I would let her sleep in. She was supposed to work tonight last I recalled but I had Sam waiting for the go ahead once Sookie's doctor gave her the all clear. If it came down to it and she couldn't work, in light of our conversation last night, I was going to have to find a way to negotiate her absenteeism. I know Sookie would put the baby first, but I also knew she enjoyed her independence and working for Sam Merlotte gave her that in some strange way. She had been helping Sam out a lot lately too, due to her desire to earn her own keep even though I told her my condo was paid for. In fact when the time came I thought we might even want to upgrade to a house. Fintan still had his place, I could fix it up, and it would be suitable for a family with a little elbow grease. The point being, Sookie was taken care of, she didn't even have to work if she didn't want to. I hadn't told her yet but a week or so ago I had already started a savings account for the baby, and I added her to my own account. The bank just needed her signature and then what's mine was hers officially.

So I went downstairs to the kitchen to make some breakfast. I was thinking crepes sounded good with sausage and fruit and took the ingredients out of the cupboard when I glanced down and noted there was an extra bowl in the sink. I looked over to the stove and realized the soup I had left out from last night was put away. I smirked to myself; glad Sookie had eaten some of it.

As promised, the flowers came from Pam and I unwrapped them and set them out on the kitchen table, leaving the card undone for Sookie to read herself. I made the crepes and as I was finishing them, Sookie came into the kitchen. One look at her in that yellow dress and I was smitten. This particular dress featured her baby bump better than some of the others she had worn, and I found myself taunted by her, and her enchanting scent. She walked over to me smelled the breakfast and then remarked...

"Mmmm it smells heavenly..."

"So do you." I replied going down to kiss the soft spot between her neck and shoulder. I knew right then and there I was going to have to keep myself busy if I didn't want to ravish her here and now. So I suggested as she turned to me and her face lingered near mine...

"I was thinking we could stop by the bar first and then to your appointment."

She nodded and met my gaze still flirting with me playfully as she bit her lip. I didn't want to jinx and tell her I wanted to get work done first so we could play afterwards, because we still didn't have the clear from her doctor, but I needed my Sookie fix. Especially now that she was showing, it was a tremendous turn on.

Yes, we had to get out of here and out of here fast, I noted to myself not falling prey to her advances when I knew we were almost to the finish line.

"Oh are those Pam's flowers?" Sookie proclaimed happily and I nodded my head.

"They are beautiful!" She marveled.

She went over to smell them, a bouquet of stargazer lilies and then she took out the card and read it. I watched Sookie's reaction to reading the card as I dished our breakfast onto plates finally asking her…

"What did she say?"

But Sookie simply smirked at me tucking the card into her pocket she remarked with a sly little smile…

"That's between us girls."

Great, feminine solidarity, just what I loved to hear, I thought. I grabbed the juice out of the fridge unable to resist a small eye toss and then Sookie came up to me from behind and she remarked whispering in my ear…

"Don't worry, you'll definitely benefit from it."

And she left it at that as she sashayed, yes I said sashayed back to the table. I had no other choice but to join her so I brought our plates and we both ate, Sookie hungrily, me hurriedly.

Once we had finished breakfast we cleaned up and then headed off to Freyja.

In the car Sookie turned on the radio to some oldies station and I found my thoughts wandering to Fintan. I knew I had to check in with Adele to see how he was doing today. I didn't know if it was too much to hope that both Sookie and Fintan would each have good health bills, but I hoped we could soon see the silver lining to this cloudy week.

My ever moving mind wandered to Fintan once more hoping all of this wasn't for nothing, putting him through that, putting Sookie through her trauma, and that poor little girl…Part of me feared for Sookie's well being as well as my own if Fintan didn't pull through especially after our little talk last night and Sookie admitting how hard it was for her to imagine losing those she love-

"ERIC!" Sookie cried in alarm interrupting my thoughts and she pointed out the windshield, then I saw a fluffy blur dart across the road.

I quickly swerved to miss it, doing some fancy steering work to ensure that we didn't get into an accident ourselves and I fishtailed through the next 20 yards landing us safely in the ditch.

I swore in Swedish and when I put the car in park I glanced at Sookie in concern worried I could have caused a real miscarriage this time I asked her…

"Are you alright?"

She nodded her head, unbuckled her seat belt and bolted out of the car.

"Sookie!" I called not sure where she was going; I quickly undid my own seat belt and then ran out after her.

"Sookie!" I called again, not understanding why she had just disappeared into the woods, hoping she wasn't sick.

Cursing again, I quickly set out to find her when she emerged from the brush carrying a fluffy white and brown mass of fur in her arms.

I gasped in relief and then confusion fell over my face as I gazed at what appeared to be a puppy.

"You almost hit this." She answered with brow creased and I shook my head in disbelief. I glanced around wondering what a puppy was doing out here in the middle of nowhere. I didn't even think there were any houses for a few miles and I remarked….

"Where did it come from?"

She shook her head unsure herself and then I noticed the thorns and dirt on its fur. The puppy was whimpering and I felt its side. Sure enough, through the fur I could feel each one of its ribs along with several long prickly burrs. As I suspected, the animal appeared as if it had been neglected.

"I think he's been out here for awhile."

Sookie frowned and put her hand on his little head.

"What should we do?" She asked me unsure and I glanced at the little fellow.

"He's probably starving…"

"Do you think someone is looking for him?" She asked concerned and I shook my head answering truthfully…

"I don't know." But judging by the looks of him, I didn't think so. I had read about these abandoned puppies before. When the owners didn't know what to do or did not want to go through the trouble of finding them homes, they would let them go out into the wild. Only truthfully that was just as bad as killing them because the animals did not know how to fend for themselves.

It was getting cold and I heard a truck coming down the road, not wanting to stand out here in the middle, I told Sookie…

"Come on, let's get him cleaned off and then we can decide what to do with him."

Sookie, carried him carefully into the car. He whimpered and scratched at the door clearly scared.

"Poor little guy." She replied in an attempt to sooth him.

I started the car back up and after the truck had passed us, I made a U turn doubling back home. So much for work this morning, I thought in passing.

The commercials had ended on the radio station and a deejay announced the next song on the line up…

"_And now for those of you who enjoy going way back down that memory lane, here is 'Glory of Love' by Dean Martin."_

The song started to play.

"You sure you're okay?" I asked Sookie again just to be sure, reaching to turn off the radio but she put her hand over my wrist in an effort to stop me.

"What breed of dog do you think this is?" She asked me, and I glanced down at the little fur ball and I answered glancing at her in question…

"Probably some kind of collie or collie mix, why?"

Her face fell in realization and she swallowed in apprehension, finally remarking.

"That was the kind of dog Eve had."

I met Sookie's gaze thinking it an odd coincidence, wondering if she was going to ask me if we could keep him now. Truthfully I hadn't given it much thought under the circumstances…only before I could think any more she sat up straight at attention and she admitted.

"She asked me if I could bring the dog back to her parents…She said she was allergic to dogs but her mom had wanted one, and Dean Martin is playing on the radio, do you know what this means Eric?"

Sookie turned to me as if she had just come up with the answer to world peace, however I was still as confused as ever because what she was saying wasn't really making much sense and I answered hesitantly…

"Not really."

Sookie's eyes locked with mine and she proclaimed as if it were the most obvious thing in the world…

"This is Dean, I'm supposed to bring him back to Mrs. St. Clair! That's what Eve wanted all along!"

I sat up unsure this was making any sense because as it sounded, Sookie was suggesting we pass this dog off to the St. Clair's and I wasn't entirely sure it would be welcome, or Sookie for that matter, nor did I want to see her go through any more trauma/drama even if her heart was in the right place.

"Are you sure that is what Eve wanted?" I asked her needing to be certain before we went through with this, because I was sure if we were wrong, a good talk wasn't going to fix it next time. I knew we would be dealing with the aftermath for quite some time. I wasn't the kind of person to entertain some whim, at the risk of upsetting a pair of grieving parents, even if it did come from a dying girls last request.

"I think it's a sign." Sookie confessed.

Closing my eyes I hoped I wasn't going to regret this because we all knew where this was headed, and answered with a nod.

"Fine, why don't we get him cleaned up and fed and then we can see about finding her parents."

Sookie nodded her head and we drove the rest of the way home in agreeable silence. My thoughts trailing back to the wreck that was Sookie just 24 short hours ago.

When we returned I suggested I call the hospital for the St. Clair's contact information, but then found out Sookie had already obtained it. My clever little detective had snuck into the nurse's station when we were visiting Fintan the other day and pulled the information from their file room. I didn't know whether to be furious or impressed so I settled on the latter. I had a feeling the hospital wouldn't dole out the St. Clair's contact information any way, lost toy or not, so she had saved us some sleuthing work.

The dog was famished and after Sookie gave him a bath in the sink, I helped to dry the little squirrel off. He was very anxious by this point but nevertheless Sookie continued to sooth him and pet him as if he was her own child.

I knew if this didn't work we would both need lots of therapy and probably a kennel for our new dog because there was no way this creature was going back to a shelter, not after this.

Sookie took out the piece of paper in which she had jotted down the St. Clair's address and we returned to my car with the puppy. They lived on the other side of town, in an older area than mine, with rich colonial mansions and we found their address. Only when we found the house there were cars lined up from down the street. I figured they were having some visitation because a couple had just arrived walking up to the home dressed in black.

Sookie was ready to get out of the car anxious to drop off her little bundle of joy, but something was telling me to give it a minute and I put my hand on her arm…

"Wait." I remarked.

She looked at me in question and then I gestured to watch the couple.

She followed my gaze and the couple rang the doorbell. A minute later a woman answered the door and Sookie exclaimed anxiously…

"That's Jennifer St. Clair, Eve's mother!"

Sookie was about to get out again when I noticed the woman who had opened the door pushed past the couple and ran out onto the lawn. A man chased after her and Sookie pulled her passenger door handle, clicking it ajar.

"Sookie wait." I proclaimed growing nervous all of the sudden because this did not look like a warm reception and sure enough, the woman collapsed in the mans arms sobbing. My face fell in dread. You could feel the pain radiating off them.

I glanced to the door again noting an older woman had ushered the couple they had bypassed quickly inside. My gaze returned to Mrs. St. Clair who was now visibly falling apart at the seams. The man pulled her back to him as she pounded against his chest.

Pits sank in my stomach getting this heavy stirring inside because I had a feeling that things were still really bad. Suddenly envisioning myself in that mans place and Sookie as the woman pounding her hands against my chest should things go south here today so I remained cautious.

He spoke to her for a minute and then she finally collapsed in his arms. Sookie's eyes teared up and I knew it was coming.

"Sookie maybe we should do this on another day." I suggested.

"No." She answered almost immediately shaking her head in refusal and then confessed….

"She needs this dog more than ever right now."

I clenched my jaw in frustration not wanting to see Sookie get beat up the same way that man did and I insisted.

"Let me bring him to her then, you wait here."

"What?" She asked in confusion and I answered…

"I'm going to bring her the dog, I think if she sees you she may have a similar reaction."

Sookie's face fell and finally she reluctantly agreed.

"Okay." She answered softly.

I explained.

"If she doesn't want him, we can take him home to live with us alright?"

Sookie nodded her head and watched on anxiously as I left the car and brought the puppy up with me to the front door.

Taking a deep breath I rang it.

The older woman answered the door to my disappointment and I asked her as she watched me in question…

"Good afternoon…Is Jennifer home?" I asked remembering the woman's name, and the woman answered looking me up and down…

"She is but she is busy at the moment, can I tell her who is calling?"

_Fuck_. I thought silently knowing if I couldn't do this anonymously, she might scare away when she made the connection to Sookie so I lied and answered…

"My name is Leif Ericson, I'm a neighbor."

The woman glanced at me again and then she went back inside. A minute later the crying woman who was out on the lawn came to the door clearly having composed herself, although her nose was still red and blotchy, and she shook her head and replied…

"I don't know any Leif Ericson, if you don't mind we are in mourning…" But I cut her off before she could continue knowing that if I didn't do this now it was all a washout. Pulling the dog up from under my coat I proclaimed.

"I found this creature sniffing around your roses…does he belong to you?" She met my gaze in confusion and then glanced at the dog. I noticed how red her eyes were and she looked very pale and thin. Despite her appearance however, the puppy took the opportune moment to jump out of my arms and ricocheted into hers.

Taken aback I tried to help her stable him and she answered trying to balance herself….

"I've never seen him before." She answered shakily as the puppy crawled up and nestled his furry head in the crook between her neck and shoulder.

"Do any of your neighbors own a collie pup?" I asked her glancing around to the other houses and she followed my gaze still clearly confused…

"I don't think so...didn't you say you were a neighbor?" She asked suspiciously.

I met her gaze in an attempt to register her reaction to all of this and finally I offered avoiding my detriment…

"Well if he doesn't belong to you, I can take him to the local shelter…I'm sorry to have bothered you Mrs. St. Clair."

I reached over to take him back but the puppy was licking her cheek and I creased my brow remembering Sookie's words.

"If I can get him to leave that is." I answered.

"My…my daughter had a toy collie that looked a lot like him…in fact we lost it somewhere when we were at the hospital." She confessed sadly and I replied in earnest…

"I'm so sorry."

She gazed at me and then she looked to the puppy and put her hand on his little fluffy head.

"She called him Dean." She explained, and a new tear fell down her cheek.

I wasn't sure if this was such a good idea by that point thinking perhaps this dog might bring her more agony and I offered…

"I can see you are busy, please allow me to take him off your hands so you can mourn with your family."

The puppy licked away one of her tears and I felt my brows crease in empathy. Reaching out for him once more she shook her head and answered pulling him closer to her chest…

"Mr. Ericson, I believe I do know who this dog belongs to."

"You do?" I asked her confused and she answered with a pain filled smile…

"He belonged to my daughter, Eve."

She nodded her head and suddenly it clicked. _Could it be that Eve really did send this dog to her mother from beyond the grave?_ I stood there for a moment and watched her with it in amazement, finally understanding now how Sookie must have felt watching her with furrowed brows and she placed her hand on the puppy's head and she remarked cordially…

"Thank you for bringing him home to us."

I realized then and there that Sookie was right. This wasn't some whim, this was meant to be and there were greater forces working here. She didn't say goodbye but took the puppy with her into the house leaving me to ponder the meaning in all of this.

xxx

_SPOV_

I saw the whole thing, teary eyed, an emotional wreck using up every spare tissue I owned going through the range of emotions from grief to heartache to joy including Mrs. St. Clair's reaction, the way Dean took to her right away and how gentle Eric had been with it all and when she finally accepted the puppy into her arms. I was about to really loose it when, I felt a ripple in my tummy. It took me by surprise at first but when I saw Eric start to walk back to the car, I couldn't help but feel joy thinking our baby, our daughter was watching it all too.

"_Yes, he's home now."_ I whispered placing my hand over my abdomen and wiping away a few stray tears quickly with my tissue before Eric returned. Maybe it was just gas but I had to think she was trying to tell me this made her happy too.

It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I finally felt like little Eve could rest in peace.

Eric opened his door and slid in beside me. I reached over to take his hand and he smiled faintly.

"She took him?" I asked just to be sure and Eric nodded his head. He glanced to me about to say something when I tackled him, pushing him back against the driver's side window. I didn't know what to say other than I felt a sudden explosion of love and relief as my arms wrapped around him overcome by something more powerful than either he or I.

"Thank you." I murmured pressing my cheek to his. I knew Eric had helped me today in ways I never thought possible.

"You're welcome." He replied with a gasp as his gaze locked with mine. I couldn't deny the fact that I needed him and I just stared into his eyes mystified as to what really happened here today, was it a miracle? That was until a car drove by, it's rear view mirror flicking a light in our eyes, distracting me enough to look at the clock and notice we had about 10 minutes to get to my appointment.

xxxx

About 15 minutes later we were sitting in the clinic. The nurse called my name and took us back to the waiting room where I was weighed, measured, and given a blood pressure test. I had gained 3 lbs since my last visit, looking to Eric, I hoped he didn't mind it if I turned into a heifer because I probably wasn't going to be one of those skinny pregnant women and then I changed into my gown.

Alcide came in a few minutes later and he asked me how I was feeling and most importantly if I had experienced any more bleeding. I was happy to tell him I had not and he seemed pleased with my answer.

"So what happens now?" I asked him hopeful that I might be able to get back to normal, well as normal as I could be for my life. Not that I wasn't prepared to take some time off if I had to, but well, no one wants to be bed ridden for the next 7 months.

"Well—" Alcide glanced from me to Eric and he explained…

"You are out of the red zone for the most part now…10 weeks signals the end of the first trimester and the beginning of the second. So you will definitely start to feel more pregnant now."

I twisted my lips unsure what he meant by that because I was pretty certain I was feeling pregnant already and Alcide clarified…

"The good news is the morning sickness will go away and your risk of miscarriage will decrease significantly. But you will also notice more changes to your body soon if you haven't. See as the estrogen levels increase your body becomes more sensitive. You will find that your sense of smell improves, for better or worse, also you might begin to crave certain foods and dislike others that you might have previously enjoyed. Your breasts will also become more sensitive and they may swell and become tender."

I glanced over to Eric who was pretending to be listening astutely even though I knew what was really going through his head and Alcide continued…

"You also may feel dizzy or nausea more often. I know you have the list of restricted medicines but 9 times out of 10 this dizzy nausea feeling can be prevented by staying hydrated and maintaining a healthy diet."

I nodded my head realizing my dizzy feeling the other day at the hospital may have been due to skipping breakfast and I felt slightly guilty.

"You will be prone to mood swings due to the hormones and estrogen." Alcide looked to Eric and explained…

"It's important that she is allowed to let it out and express herself." Eric nodded and I took his hand and squeezed it. I knew he had already proven his massive tolerance for me lately due to my estrogen levels or more likely natural born craziness and hoped I wouldn't put him through hell in the months to come.

Alcide smiled and pulled out a book that had pictures of babies still in the womb. I was amazed at the gorgeous photography and Alcide pointed to the picture of the 10-week fetus.

"As you can see, this fetus is beginning to develop its fingers and toes. At 10 weeks babies also begin to develop their taste buds and teeth. Which in my personal opinion may be part of why you begin to have intense cravings. The tail of the embryo has now disappeared and the heart is now fully developed. Its brain is still growing as is its internal organs but as you can see the babies frame has formed completely."

I glanced at the photograph in amazement and put my hand over my stomach.

"The baby will continue to gain weight and as the weeks pass its organs will develop fully and then its just a matter of making sure the organs are fully functional and the baby is continuing to grow and gain weight before you give birth."

I smiled and flipped through the book, while Eric asked him…

"Is there any way you can tell the sex yet?" I know we had asked this last time and Alcide explained…

"Well we can look when she has her ultrasound, but chances are not until at least 15 weeks."

Eric nodded and glanced at me with a twinkle in his eyes that tugged at my heartstrings. I smirked at him in reply and then Alcide had me get up on the table so he could run the machine.

It was amazing to see how much our baby had grown even a few weeks since the last time I was here. She was so beautiful and when we saw that blinking light of her heart, it sent a wave of excitement through my veins.

"So is she okay now? Do we have to worry about more hemorrhaging?" Eric asked Alcide worriedly as I wiped off the gel and retied my gown on the side.

"Well there is always the risk especially if it's happened a first time, but generally speaking it was a very minor occurrence of subchorionic hemorrhaging, so it's something to take as a precaution."

Eric sighed in relief and Alcide continued…

"I think you can return to your normal activity, but remember this-Just because you have a license to drive, don't be reckless, and if it happens again, come in to see me right away."

We both knew what that meant and Eric nodded his head with creased brows still apparently concerned for my welfare. I wanted to throw my arms around him and kiss him because he just looked so sweet right now, but Alcide gave me another list of recommended foods and exercises to keep me healthy.

We thanked Alcide and I told him I was sorry about the trouble Tuesday and for creating any rifts with Pam, but he just smirked sheepishly and explained…

"Well she above all should know that we have a patient/doctor confidentiality agreement, not to mention I thought you were in good hands." He met Eric's gaze and Eric nodded to him with a knowing smile.

I noticed at that moment how much Eric had calmed down. On our first appointment he was almost downright hostile towards Alcide. Maybe the fact that he was Pam's boyfriend made it easier for him, or maybe it was just that fatherhood was softening his heart. I smiled warmly and took his hand once more. We left shortly thereafter.

xxx

When we got home I called Sam and told him I wasn't going to make it in tonight either. I know it was sort of irresponsible on my part to call in sick but under the circumstances, I felt justified. I also just wanted to spend some time with Eric because I needed to be with him right now. After everything that happened, I knew Eric was the cure to my ailing heart. I was able to switch shifts with Arlene, which I'm sure she was happy to do. She was always complaining about having to work on Fridays anyway because it was her date night.

I told Eric I called Sam and that glint returned in his eyes. He suggested…

"Well in that case why don't you go upstairs and I will join you for a shower after I've started lunch."

I smirked thinking that sounded perfect and I nodded my head in agreement. I found a bathrobe and changed into it, clipping up my hair, I was looking forward to the hot steam of the water with Eric's arms around me taking a seat on the bed I leaned back and fantasized about the hot water pelting against my back when Eric came in carrying a tray of food.

I met his gaze in confusion at first not aware he was going to bring lunch up here when he set down the tray and I noticed its contents. A plate of delicious looking fruit and a bowl of melted chocolate and I raised my brows in question.

"What's this?" I asked him sitting up, but Eric simply smirked and set down the tray next to me on the bed and explained…

"You need to relax and take it easy, and I thought we could try something we haven't yet done before, if you are up for a little creative foreplay that is." He answered. I met his devilish gaze still curious what he was planning on doing.

"Creative foreplay?" I asked intrigued and Eric nodded his head leaning into me with that smug smirk he answered…

"I want to show you what a bargain you are really getting with a future husband such as me."

I couldn't help but smirk because he really was that adorable, only my smile faded when he pulled off his shirt giving me a stellar view of his sculpted pectorals, which caused me to swallow back a lump in my throat. Was I really marrying this guy? I wondered as my eyes glazed over in hazy amazement.

He swiped a strawberry from the plate, dunked it in the chocolate and offered to feed it to me. The chocolate wakened my senses and I smelled something nutty too. I met his gaze in intrigue, but he merely smirked, clearly wanting to feed me right now, so I figured why the hell not right? What girl wouldn't want an Adonis type future husband, successful bar owner and father of her beautiful baby feeding her?

I took a bite of the strawberry he was holding the sweet nutty richness coating my tongue along with the tanginess of the strawberry and I felt an explosion in my mouth. This wasn't just any chocolate, this was Nutella and it tasted amazing.

"Mmmm." I closed my eyes enjoying the taste and then his lips were on mine. Chocolate swirled through my mouth followed by Eric's tongue. If this was Eric being creative and trying to prove himself as gentle to me, I thought I could get used to it. I felt a chill on my skin as his hands dropped to my waist and loosened the tie, exposing my breasts in their full glory.

I glanced at him drunkenly as he fed me an apple slice this time covered in warm Nutella and then he dunked another strawberry in the small dish.

He had me spellbound, wondering what his next move would be as his lips joined mine once more guiding me down on to my back and then to my dismay he began to trace the strawberry along the curvature of my breasts, leaving a trail of chocolate in his wake.

"Eric." I gasped unsure what he was doing but he simply shook his head and remarked….

"Shh…just relax."

My chest heaved and my breasts ached, and all those things Alcide had talked about began to happen. The dizziness and hypersensitivity to touch and smell. My body came to life with an electric current humming between us after he plunged his mouth over one very hard, sensitive and throbbing peak.

I moaned as his mouth heated my cool tight nipple, and then he moved his lips to the other one.

I realized now why he said he would join me in the shower because after this, we were going to need one.

He plunged the second strawberry in my mouth and took out another apple slice and painted a line down my navel.

I shivered on contact as the cool wet fruit ran against my skin. I knew where this was headed before he even got there. Eric had cleverly gotten me to remove my clothes for him giving him the pure advantage so he could prove to me that he was always in control.

It was torturous ecstasy and made me realize that the thing I wanted most of all was him moving inside me now.

His hot tongue licked along the second line, which led down to my own Garden of Eden and I clenched as he ventured closer and closer to the spot that was aching the most.

He came back up to feed me the slice of fruit, but by this point I was on to him and desperate, not wanting any more foreplay, I swatted his hand aside and pulled his mouth down to meet mine in a searing kiss. I was so wet, so ready, I urgently yanked at his waistband unbuckling his jeans and shucking his pants and boxer briefs down in one swift move.

Eric grunted in surprise as his manhood flew out of his pants in full glory. Torn between my own relief and getting revenge, I knew I could give just as much as I was getting and I pushed him onto his back. I know he thought he was protecting me by treating me like a porcelain doll, but I wasn't one and I was a lot stronger now because of him. I knew we had to be careful, but that didn't mean we had to keep our training wheels on either. I loved Eric, and he loved me, and we were having a baby together, and without him, I wouldn't be the woman I had become today.

"My turn." I replied with a wicked glint in my eyes and I yanked his pants the rest of the way off.

"Turning the tables is so not fair." Eric muttered as I eyed him with one brow raised holding my confiscated piece of chocolate covered fruit.

"I can be creative too." I replied with a smirk as I eyed his rapidly growing arousal between my thighs.

"What do you plan on doing with that piece of fruit?" He asked me with a smirk as his gaze met mine mischievously and I glanced to my hand holding the Nutella covered apple.

"Tempting you, and showing you what a bargain you will be getting in your future Mrs. Northman." I mused as I ground my naked pelvis over his hardened shaft and he groaned.

"I think it's definitely working." He muttered in painful pleasure as my hand reached down to massage him…

"But…if you are trying to one up me you might need something more than fruit." He joked with a lucid smile, his eyes falling back in his head and I finally concluded…

"Oh trust me, I have much more than just fruit."

And with that I shoved the apple in his mouth to shut him up, bore down my hips over his and took him inside me. The pleasure was so intense I cried out as my future husband and father of my child flipped me over for a searing kiss completing our loving union and knew that I had finally found the happiness I had been looking for.


	35. Chapter 35

**AN**: Okay, I have a confession. I've been holding onto this chapter longer than neccessary because I didn't want to let it go. :( Im going to really miss writing this story. But alas, here we are, at the end. Im happy where it finishes up and I hope you all will be too. It's a loong one, but I wanted to make sure to include everything. This really has been an amazing journey for me and you, the readers are the ones who kept me going throughout it all. So I blow huge kisses to all of you for inspiring this piece of work. Thank you! xoxo. Hopefully this last chapter gives you all the answers you are looking for, and if not, Im always available via PM if you need to ask. Thanks again for reading and reviewing and I hope you enjoy! Love you all muchisimo! Arrivederci! xoxo

**Chapter 35-The Birth of Eve**

**_SPOV_**

Well I wish I could say I was still my comfortable, not quite skinny, but modest size 10. But I had in fact put on 23 extra pounds over the last 6 months and was even stretching out my size 12 maternity clothes. I was sure only about 6-7 of those pounds were actually from the baby, which meant when I had this kid, I had my work cut out for me getting my figure back. Add that to the swollen feet, my aching breasts, which included aching nipples that had been stiff as rocks for the last month straight, along with the cramps, and it was so not a barrel of laughs.

It wasn't all bad though Eric and I had gotten in some fun before I blew up like a blimp. He made good on his promise to take me to Sweden and show me where he grew up. I sort of thought of it as a little honeymoon even though we weren't officially married yet. I know, I know. Part of me wanted to do it right after he asked but we both decided to wait till after our baby was born, that way we could all be a part of it, I could spend all my free time preparing for the baby rather than a wedding, and I could wear any dress I wanted. We never did anything normally anyway, so I figured why start now right? We were married in our hearts and that's what really mattered most to me anyway.

It was a godsend to just be able to get away when we did because both of our working situations had made it hard to even leave for a couple weeks. Even though neither Eric nor his staff would admit it, his bar had suffered his loss when he was gone all those months living at my Gran's place and they really needed him to help steer them back. It wasn't like they were losing business or anything, but sometimes people just needed a leader, and well, that was Eric. I knew Eric wanted to get his elbows dirty too. He wasn't a hand's off kind of manager/bar owner; he was very hands on, as I knew well because he couldn't keep his hands off me either.

And, I felt bad telling Sam I was going to take a vacation when he had just lost one of his waitresses. Yep, Dawn finally quit, which actually relieved me for some reason. It relieved Jason too. And I think it even relieved Tara for a little bit. But since Dawn was more trouble than Jason could handle and wasn't very dependable at work, you can understand why it was good that she left.

It surprised me to say that Tara and Jason were still together too, well for the moment. I had lost track of how many times they had actually broken up. But, something still kept pulling them back together, so who was I to criticize? Plus Jason was my brother, and I wanted him to find a nice girl, and well, okay yes Tara wasn't exactly a nice girl, but she was definitely a great catch. And I knew Tara loved him, even though only God knew why. And, when they got along it was great for everyone, because the post break up Sunday dinners at Gran's house weren't really fun for anyone when Jason was in attendance. So we always tended to support them even more so when they were together just for our own peace of mind as well as Jason and Tara's.

Gran had talked about moving into Fintan's old house with him at first because she wondered if it might be weird for Fintan to live in a house decorated with memories from her marriage to my Grandpa Earl, but once Fintan arrived there for dinner one Sunday, she couldn't get him to leave. He loved looking through the old albums and puttering around with the oak wood branches scattered about the property. Apparently he was a pretty skilled wood carver, which I didn't know until I discovered him carving something for my grandmother one day. And Gran was always happiest in that home, she was more active in Bon Temps with the church and her History club, so it just made sense for her to stay there.

But back to Sweden. It took some serious pulling of teeth, but worth every tooth when we got there. We actually didn't even get going on our trip until December. And let me tell you when it snow's in Sweden, it really snows. I got to experience what a 'real winter', as Eric calls it, felt like. I wasn't too pleased by the temperature drop but the glittering snow and sparkling icicles turned it into a spectacular winter wonderland. Not to mention Eric put plenty of effort into keeping me warm, excessively so. We even spent some time driving along the beautiful Swedish coastline. It blew me away how different a world it was from the states. Everyone was so relaxed and they really knew how to enjoy themselves and stop to smell the roses, even of those roses were buried under 5 feet of snow.

I got to meet a couple of Eric's friends from high school too. Isabel and Felipe. They were such a sweet couple. They had two little ones to keep them busy and seemed thrilled to learn that Eric and I were also expecting. We finished up our trip by way of London and Oxford and I was in love. Especially with London because it was such a vibrant city, but Oxford was as equally enthralling. We began at the famous Church of St. Mary the Virgin, off Radcliffe Square, yes I actually stepped foot in a church, several of them in fact, even in Stockholm. After the thing with Eve and the dog, how could I not believe in miracles and a higher power? Eric was always a skeptic but I think he found some meaning in it all too. Plus I knew he was a fan of the old art and architecture. Then we toured Fintan's old stomping grounds. I made sure to take plenty of pictures to bring back with us to show them. Eric also took a few, some we wouldn't be showing any one, and I made sure to delete them off the camera once we got home too.

All in all it was amazing and probably one of the best experiences of my life, aside from meeting Eric. I never knew the exhilaration and freedom one got from traveling and learning more about Eric's history and my heritage as well as Fintan's, made it even more meaningful for us. When it was time to return home I knew I would miss it and we would have to come back. Maybe next time with our little girl, or on a real honey moon. Yes we were going to have a daughter. After much pestering from Eric, Alcide made a special appointment for me at my 14 week mark even though I wasn't supposed to go in until 16 weeks and Alcide declared it was a probably girl, only because he couldn't find the little peanut, which could also mean he couldn't tell yet. I had never seen Eric happier which both humored me and warmed my heart, so who was I to press the fact that I knew Eric would treat her like a total 'Daddy's little princess'. I was pretty happy too. The idea of us having a family, and knowing it was going to be a daughter just made it all the more real.

Speaking of real, I looked down past my huge Buddha shaped belly once more and hoped I wasn't going to get any bigger. I had two weeks left. Not that parts of the pregnancy hadn't been enjoyable, but I was ready to get this little girl out ASAP.

_"Are you taking a shower?"_ Eric called to me from the bedroom and I glanced at the door dividing us thinking maybe that was a good idea. We were going to my Gran's place today and I answered back.

"Yeah, I think so, just a quick one."

As I turned to the faucet I bumped into my tube of toothpaste sending my toothbrush flying to the floor.

"Dammit!" I grumbled.

I reached down to pick it up, realizing any attempt at bending over gracefully was a lost cause and forced myself to squat down to reach it when I found I couldn't see my feet nor the tube of toothpaste anymore. So I used my balance to lean towards it when my equilibrium broke and I skidded to the floor slamming my head against the corner of the sink vanity.

"OW!"

I cried holding my hand to my forehead. And double ow, I had no idea how I had gotten my legs into this position. Of course Eric had taken the opportune moment to peek his head in and ask…

"Are you okay?"

Great, not like he hadn't seen me so clumsy before but this was doing nothing for my self-image at the moment. I had no idea what Eric found attractive in me when I looked like this Ogre.

"No. I think I'm stuck in this position." I answered bitterly frustrated about it all. He came to my side and helped to lift me up.

I groaned when my legs were straightened toppling into his arms, I met his gaze with embarrassment and confessed…

"I can't wait till this pregnancy is over."

"I don't know, some parts are pretty entertaining." He answered bemused by my clumsiness. I rolled my eyes thinking him a smart ass, and he reached over to hand my electric toothbrush to me.

"Ill get you a new brush head." He replied in attempt to make peace, and I covered my face about to tell him how mortifying it was to not even be able to bend over any more to pick up a darn toothbrush, when I felt a big cramp, and I groaned, tightening my grip on his shoulder needing to hold onto the sink with my other hand.

"What's wrong?" Eric asked worriedly rushing to support my other side and pull me back to him.

My face cringed in pain and then as fast as it came it was gone and I sighed in relief…

"Just another cramp, you are so lucky you are not a woman." I remarked between a few gasps I gestured over to the toilet seat so I could sit down.

He let me go, taking the toothbrush from me, he set it on the counter and then he crouched down between my legs and kissed the top of my belly softly. Something I had come to notice Eric often did when I was feeling like this.

"I promise Ill make up for it after she's born." He professed tenderly and my face relaxed in empathy. I knew he felt just as helpless as me.

"I'm holding you to that." I mused finding a smirk for him.

"So those pesky cramps again huh?" Eric remarked and I nodded my head holding my belly I felt traces of a new cramp starting.

I took a few huffs of breath and nodded my head, relieved again when this one turned out to be much less painful than the first.

"Well." Eric met my gaze with a devilish smirk and he replied…

"I think I could help you with that little problem."

I met his gaze wondering why he was suggesting we try to have intercourse. Last night I thought I had nearly crushed his manhood, all two tons of me sitting on top but Eric obviously didn't seem to mind since he was apparently more than ready to go through that again.

"I appreciate the offer, I really do but, well…Look at me!"

"I'm looking." Eric replied as his eyes raked over me and I met his gaze in confusion…

"Honey you really don't have to, I know how unpleasant it must be with me right now…I can help you out later if you want but—"

"Unpleasant?" Eric asked me straightening up and appearing baffled.

I didn't want to say it out loud but we both knew it was true…

"I look like a two ton whale right now and am pretty sure most men wouldn't want to make love to a pregnant woman, I mean we are so fat and disproportioned."

Okay yeah I had a feeling I was possibly over reacting but I was on a roll.

Eric just smirked, took my hand and remarked as he licked his lips appetizingly…

"First off, most men find pregnant women extremely attractive, especially yours truly and…"

He scanned me again which caused my skin to tingle and he added with that sexy voice.

"Secondly, you have a baby growing inside you, our baby, and I think that is the most beautiful and sexy thing on Earth."

My face colored and he brought his hand to my chin and he confessed with a low voice…

"And I probably shouldn't tell you this but trust me when I say my motivations have not been completely selfless."

I smirked and he drew a playful line against the lace trim of my négligée, which caused my body to tremble in reply and he concluded staring directly at my cleavage.

"But if you don't feel like having sex with me, I completely understand."

His gaze flicked up to meet mine and I felt a heat flush through my entire body. How he could do that with one look was beyond me. I'd have to be crazy not to take him up on his proposal. It was simply an offer I couldn't refuse.

"When you put it like that." I answered placing my palm flat against his chest in answer and he smirked that wicked glint returning to his gaze.

"Yes, I know I can be repulsive to pregnant women, but at least I have you to take pity on me." Eric mused and I swatted his chest as he pulled me into his arms. I knew I was being ridiculous now and was about to offer An argument but his lips smashed down over mine silencing me. I was spellbound by his mouth, his tongue twirling around mine and lost my breath as he took me away with him into that other world of ours.

Some how Eric skillfully pulled my négligée up over my head nearly completely undressing me in one swoop and then he reached into the shower to turn it on.

"Wait, we're going in there?" I wasn't sure if Id still fit with him in it too, it had been awhile since we shared one, but Eric simply nodded his head and answered with a smirk…

"You can bet your Buddha belly we are."

I couldn't help but smile, because he knew about my little term of endearment for my present state of disproportion, but shrieked as the cold air brushed my nether regions because he had just yanked off my maternity panties and then he followed with his own boxer briefs.

He came back and swept me up and I shrieked worried he might drop me but as the gravity settled us I found myself seated securely cradled in his arms as I straddled his mid section and the water sprayed hot spurts between us. But that did not deter Eric, no his hot lips were back on mine and one of his hands had begun to roam along the side of my right breast, the other on my ass, as his skilled thumb brushed against my highly sensitive peak and I moaned. He definitely knew my body inside and out and what I craved.

His mouth then clamped down on my left breast and I cried out in pleasure. I had to find something to hold onto to brace myself as his hungry mouth went to work on my tender peaks and I gripped the showerhead above me, only my hand fell on the rotating portion and water began to spray everywhere. My hand fell on the shampoo bottle instead and this is when Eric raised his lips to my neck and bit down. _Oh for the love of all that was holy!_ I thought lucidly as my eyes fell back and my own bodily fluids ran down my thighs. He moved closer to me, but the gravity was pulling me down. I felt Eric's desire rise up and nestle in between my womanhood awaiting his entrance, but I was also slipping.

I moaned when his lips met mine once more and then he propped me up against the cool tile wall behind us. Eric pulled away for a moment a spark in his eyes, and I could see the desire, and love, and passion culminating before it all came crashing down on me and my body was turned inside out.

My nails ran across his back possessively as he began to thrust, slamming my well-padded ass into the tile wall, while his long shaft pierced me from the front. _So I didn't break him last night_, I thought in momentary relief before the world grew hazy. I used my thighs to grip him locking my legs behind his perfect ass in order to hold my new position, every thrust, every push and pull and contraction crowned my grunts and moaning and groaning. Oh god he felt amazing! All of my earlier pain was forgotten and now all I could see was the big ball of Eric pleasuring me from head to toe.

I wanted to kiss him and never stop kissing him until my dying breath but his angle of penetration kept me at bay and then he propped me up higher and started to move faster. My walls were rapidly caving in falling under the pressure as I felt my orgasm crescent to its final climax. The pleasure was so incredibly intense it was if I could feel every molecule, every cell that joined us, along with the static electricity that made the friction between us causing an ecstasy so finitely incredible that I nearly banged my head against the wall and shattered the glass shower door that separated us from the rest of the bathroom.

"Eric!" I moaned loudly, my hand rattling the shower door as he rattled my insides, my body humming, about to drop the ball and break open the dam that was barricading my release.

"OH GOD!"

"ERIC!" I cried out as his hand cupped my ass and he angled his pelvis towards mine joining us perfectly like two pieces of a puzzle and for a moment, I really did think I saw God, the blinding white light so bright as my eyes filled with stars and my body caved under the pressure. The release so exquisitely amazing I actually thought we reached a higher plain of existence and then I felt Eric spill into me completing our union.

I didn't care about my Buddha belly in that moment, reaching up to pull his neck down to my lips. I kissed his mouth hungrily as my protruding waistline pressed firmly between us. Eric finally eased his grips as my legs slid down slick against his wet glistening skin. We were both coming off the high we gave each other and I dared to open my eyes and look into his.

He smiled smugly at me and replied after a long moment had passed...

"Sounds like I was right."

My face colored pretending to be appalled that he would use my words to taunt me right now and I watched him as he raised his brow waiting for me to reply expectantly. Begrudgingly I finally answered...

"Fine, you can add relieving cramps to the long list of things sex with you does to me, you are a sex God okay!"

He simply smirked and mused reaching down to grab the shampoo that fell at our feet.

"Of course, but you know that only makes you my sexy Goddess."

I rolled my eyes recognizing bullshit when I heard it, but neglected to argue, because debating anything with Eric was like trying to convince a zebra that he didn't have stripes.

"Uh huh, suuure..."

"Would you like me to show you again how sexy you are to me?" Eric asked as his hand dropped provocatively to my breasts, copping a feel before I swiped the shampoo bottle from him and replied calling his bluff...

"No that's okay, I believe you. And Id also like to get a shower in before we run out of hot water."

Eric chuckled and took the soap in his very large hand and remarked with another wicked glint...

"Now I think that is a wonderful idea lover, we can have the best of both worlds."

He dropped his hand and I looked at him in question, but my eyes widened when I felt where his hand went with the soap and then I realized we probably weren't getting out of here any time soon. Not that I minded.

xxxx

_Eric, Eric, Eric, what was I going to do with him?_ I wondered an hour later standing outside our closet with hair in tangles, dressed in a crumpled sheet my body still recovering from our morning sex capade that had continued well after our shower.

But I did feel amazing. Maybe I could let him keep his title of sex God, at least until the afterglow wore off, I thought with a smirk to myself.

I pulled out several outfits to try on, and let me tell you, its hard to find good maternity clothes, and not only good, but nice clothes that still fit me and as I suspected, only one really still fit and looked halfway decent. I stared at myself in the mirror in my azure blue sundress and noticed again how huge my breasts were. It was no wonder I couldn't see my feet. I had to get through my breasts and Buddha belly first!

Instead of attempting to bend down again, I asked Eric if he could pull out a pair of flats for me in the closet. I wasn't even going to attempt heels and then I grabbed a moss green cardigan to complete the ensemble.

Eric handed them to me watched me with a bemused smirk...

"What?" I asked him curious as to where that smirk came assuming the worst...

"If you even think about making a fat joke right now Ill strangle you." But he just put his hand on my back and answered gently.

"You look so tempting in that dress with your glowing skin, full lips just begging to be kissed, and hair all tangled like you have just been fully ravished, I was thinking, I could take you again right here and now." My face flushed as I thought to myself...Oh is that all?

"You aren't tired after?" I asked him in disbelief and Eric shook his head dropping his lips and stopping just mere millimeters from mine he answered...

"Never."

Okay, so I definitely knew why I loved him. He could charm the pants off me, literally. I studied his gaze for a moment noting how close we were, his long lashes fanning those startling blue eyes staring right back at me and I was powerless. I placed my hand around his neck and he met me the rest of the way in a delicious very yummy, better than waffles and maple syrup and chocolate chip cookies and ice cream kind of kiss.

The words spilled from my mouth..."I love you." After we came up for air and Eric simply smirked and he answered...

"I know."

He kissed me again in reply, which brought back more butterflies. _How the heck could he do that?_ I had a feeling Eric was trying to make the most out of it now because after the baby came we probably wouldn't be getting much sleep, let alone sex. So I savored it for all it was worth, which was a lot.

I soon realized though we would wind up right back where we started and never get over to Grans if we stayed in here all day. Not that I think Eric had any problem with that, nor me really, I mean purely for therapeutic purposes of course. But we promised Gran we'd come over this afternoon. She needed Eric's help with one of her lighting fixtures because she thought one of the wires may have burnt out, so naturally Eric said he would take a look at it. And while they worked on the lights, I thought I could start on dinner.

I gave him one last kiss for good measure and then confessed...

"Okay, we have to get ready."

Eric smirked and simply nodded his head. I don't know why I felt like jumping his bones when he turned to finish dressing himself, well that's not true, I knew exactly why, but we really did have to go.

I turned my attention back to the mirror and put on some light make up. I realized there was no way of covering up this sex hair, so I curled it in big loose waves with my curling iron and then shortly there after, we left.

xxxx

My Gran was so thrilled to see us she gave both Eric and me huge hugs when we got there. We arrived before everyone else, which was great since I wanted to help with dinner and Eric was going to take a look at the light in the foyer. Gran being the gracious Southern hostess she was offered us both a glass of lemonade along with cookies fresh out of the oven and we quickly fell into pace.

Fintan was thrilled also to have company and once Gran and Eric left the kitchen he went back to his room and came out with something in his hand. I glanced down wondering what he had when he revealed a wood carved rose held within his fingers.

"A beautiful flower for my beautiful grand daughter," he replied charmingly and I gasped surprise not expecting him to have something for me...

"Fintan, this is stunning! You didn't have to do this."

"Oh but I wanted to My Dear." He mused and gave me a quick kiss on my cheek.

Still stunned I couldn't imagine how long it took him to carve this, he put so much detail into it and Fintan explained.

"You see a rose is a flower not like any other, it's hearty, and fragrant, and has great beauty, but the thorns also give it strength and protection. Most importantly a rose represents love, the love it can give to others, and the love it has for itself because it remains true, everlasting, and timeless, just like you."

I found my eyes misting after hearing Fintan speak because it was really sweet and I was a hormonal pregnant woman and everything made my cry these days, and I reached over to give him a hug.

"Thank you." I whispered in an attempt to control my emotion and Fintan nodded and mused...

"Well if you like that, just wait till you see what I'm working on for your little Falling Star." He winked at me and I couldn't help but laugh.

Fintan went off into his bedroom with his tea after announcing that he was going to take a nap before everyone got here. "Even Spring Chickens need their rest," he said and I couldn't help but smirk again. He was such a charming man, I could understand what my Grandmother saw in him, and envisioned Eric and me probably having similar conversations about Spring Chickens and tea when we were in our 70's too.

Gran was cooking a pot roast and it was starting to smell heavenly, but she had the oven on low so it would be at least a couple hours before it was done.

"Oh, honey help yourself to anything in the fridge, Eric and I are going to make a quick run to the hardware store in Shreveport for some wire splitters and a new lighting fixture. Jason said he will be here at 5, but we should be back by then." Gran proclaimed coming into the kitchen for her purse and keys.

I nodded my head, and Eric smiled at me through the doorway. I raised my hand and waved goodbye as they left together. Not quite sure what I could do with myself because I knew it was far too early to make the salad and biscuits.

I saw our kitty, Tina scurry by me and meowed at the back porch door.

"You just want to go catch chipmunks don't you?" I asked her and she meowed again hoping she didn't come back with one of those things in her mouth, or parts of one of those things, which she had been known to do before.

"Okay, but you have to be good."

The cat simply gazed out past the screen door and I let her outside. As the door opened I felt a cool gentle breeze brush against my cheek and noted the sun was shining. It was actually a very lovely First of March, and I didn't think it would hurt me if I took a short little stroll around the property. It was something I had done often when I still lived here and I kind of missed exploring and discovering which plants had made it through the winter, or if I was lucky I could catch a glimpse at some of the wildlife.

So I let the door close behind me and then I began to descend the stairs. I was all the way to the back of the property when I couldn't help but notice the big dark structure on the horizon.

I could honestly say seeing Bill's empty house made me feel sad. Because when I thought about that day the memory of her death and all that was lost still sat with me, even though Eric was right and it had gotten easier to cope with his ongoing support and love, I still couldn't forget it. Sometimes it still felt like it had happened yesterday. I didn't know what I would do if I lost something so vital to me, like our baby or Eric. I didn't think I could cope; they were such a big part of my life now. Sometimes when I looked at myself in the mirror it was hard to remember the life I used to have before I met Eric.

I could not believe how wrong I had been about Bill, how I had actually fought to defend him. I couldn't forgive him for what he did, maybe some day, but it was too hard to wrap my brain around at the moment. I did not know how Id react if and when I ever saw Bill again. But luckily, I didn't have to worry about that for a long time.

Bill went down to the Louisiana State Penitentiary in Angola after his trial. He was sentenced to 35 years on charges of Second-degree Murder under Vehicular Manslaughter. He tried to write me once, but much like his check, after I read his letter, I threw it into the fireplace to burn away. Thinking about Bill and his pleas for my forgiveness was like gazing into a deep dark empty abyss filled with cobwebs and dust. There was nothing left to salvage and I just wanted to look ahead of me now, for my family, for our future. That is what mattered most. Life was too short to deal with other people's bullshit anyway.

I passed by Eric's chopping block, my thoughts turning to fonder times as I remembered the first time I saw him cutting wood out back with his shirt off. He had no idea I was spying him through the window, but it was kind of hard not to with eye candy like him strutting around. It was no wonder I fell for him as fast as I did.

I found my feet carrying me down the path to the lake and made my way to the end of the dock with the one tiny rowboat still latched on to the side. I recalled the night of that big thunder storm, running out of breath, trying to jump into the boat before Eric caught me because I was afraid I might shatter and then everything came pounding out like the storm over our heads, and we made love right on that beach, rolling around in the sand. I smiled to myself thinking how far we had come since then.

My gaze naturally falling to that Buddha belly of mine and I mused to our unborn child...

"We are going to have a lot to tell you about when you're older. But I do promise you; I will do everything I can to protect you from the darkness of the world for as long as I can. There will always be love surrounding you."

I promised her placing my hand across my navel and I smiled to myself envisioning Eric and I taking our little squirt out on that rowboat for the first time and telling her how her daddy and I first met. I thought about sitting down and dangling my feet over the dock, not sure how Id get myself up, but it seemed appealing and I leaned over to grab the dock post when I felt a surge of pain.

I quickly straightened up and took a deep breath, thinking it an odd cramp because this wasn't like the others, this one felt higher. Either way I figured I needed to take it easy and start heading back to the house so I took the western path. I was a little over half way back when I felt another sharp pain, this time it was stronger. I prayed that I wasn't going into labor right now, that it was just those Braxton Hicks things Alcide had mentioned and I continued to drag myself along, the pain getting more unbearable with each step.

I saw the house emerge in my line of vision to my immense relief and tried to concentrate on getting there and not what my body was feeling, because frankly panic was starting to set in. _What if something was wrong?_ I thought wondering if our baby was hurting right now, what if she was dying or dead? It terrified me to think such horrible things, but I couldn't stop my mind from wandering there.

"Ahh." I groaned stumbling on the porch steps with hot tears in my eyes, realizing that one really hurt.

I had to call Eric.

I sucked it in and pushed myself up, pleading with her...

"Please be okay, don't come early."

I saw the cat down the porch and she looked at me with those deep green eyes. For a moment I wondered if she could somehow help me, or try to reach Eric, or bring my phone to me, but the cat then meowed wanting to get back into the house obviously disappointed by my pleas.

My brows creased in pain and I reached for the door Tina scurrying inside, and I watched it helplessly run away.

"Thanks for nothing." I remarked sardonically thinking cats were nothing like those rescue dogs one saw on television.

I made it inside to my relief now needing to find my phone, I held onto the wall as I made my way down the hall and towards my purse. My head was feeling very heavy and my natural instinct was to lie down but I knew I had to get help first. I couldn't do this on my own.

I gasped again feeling another stabbing strike and I collapsed on an old chair, my face wincing as the pain coursed through me.

"Please don't come yet honey, not until your daddy is here, not until the doctor comes, Pleassssse." My voice gave way wincing the last part of my plea.

I took a deep breath knowing there only had to be about 20 more steps to the kitchen where my purse was and I used all the strength I possessed in that minute to pull myself up on my shaky legs and close the gap.

To my immense relief I found my purse and took out my red i phone. I had Eric on speed dial and quickly pressed his number. I felt another shock of pain this time it forced me to drop the phone and hang onto the edge of the counter. I gasped blinking back more tears in an attempt to stay strong as I struggled to reach for my phone. It was still ringing when I brought it back to my ear and for a moment I worried Eric might not have his phone on and then I heard his raspy voice on the other end...

_"Sookie?"_

I was about to reply when my foot slipped on something. I looked down to see what it was when I realized it was me. I was standing over a pool of clear liquid. I gasped in horror.

_"Sookie? Are you there?"_ Eric asked from the other end I murmured...

"Eric?"

_"Yes, what's going on? You sound funny."_

At that moment the tears began to fall as I panicked because Eric wasn't here and I knew I couldn't have this baby here alone, finally answering breathless in dread as a wave of terror hit me...

"I think my water just broke."

_"What?"_ He gasped, but I had lost the strength to stand.

I lowered myself to the floor because my head was spinning and I needed to sit down.

"Eric, I'm scared." I confessed the tears falling now, no longer sure I was ready for this, to be a parent, to be a mother, for any of it.

_"Sookie, just stay there okay, I'm calling Alcide. We are leaving Shreveport right now!"_

I groaned inwardly, he was still in Shreveport that was at least 30 minutes away. Alcide was there too, that was if Eric could even reach him. I heard my Gran in the background ask him...

_"How far are the contractions?"_

_"Sookie, how far are the contractions?" _Eric asked before I heard wheels screeching on the other end and I shook my head.

"I don't know."

I tried to grab a towel and then I felt my body jolt with pain.

I groaned, biting back a cry.

_"Are you having one right now?"_ Eric asked in alarm in his voice and I nodded my head biting down.

"Yessss, I think so."

I started puffing trying to remember the breathing exercises to ease the pain.

_"Can you remember where you were when you had the one before that?"_

I heard honking and my Gran in the background saying. _"Honey she's going to need you there alive, keep your eyes on the road. And you need to get the doctor to her, chances are she won't make it to a hospital now"_

_"I have to call Alcide."_ Eric announced in a panic and I nodded my head.

_"You're going to be fine, I love you!" _He proclaimed his voice cracking with emotion and I nodded my head answering with pain across my face...

"I know."

_"Just stay there. We'll be there very soon."_

"Okay." I agreed, remembering something just as Eric was about to say goodbye...

"It was right before I called you, like a minute."

_"What?"_ Eric asked in confusion and I explained as I leaned my face against the cool side of the cupboard for relief...

"My contraction."

_"Oh."_ It was quiet on the other end for a moment and Eric finally spoke...

_"Four minutes."_

_"Son you better get off that phone right now cause she's going to have that baby whether you're there or not!"_

_"Okay, Sookie, I gotta go, please be okay. Ill get Alcide."_

I nodded and whimpered...

"Bye."

_"I love-"_

_"BOY YOU ALREADY SAID THAT! GIVE ME THE PHONE RIGHT NOW! SOOKIE HONEY WE'LL BE THERE SOON, JUST HOLD TIGHT, TRY TO FIND SOME PLACE TO LAY DOWN, AND DON'T PUSH UNTIL WE GET THERE-!"_

And with that the phone went quiet on the other end. I let it fall from my hand limply and focused my gaze on the clock on the kitchen wall.

Hoping I could see him before I passed out from the pain. I heard the hands of the clock tick wondering if this could be it. I knew you didn't hear many stories about women dying in childbirth anymore, but that's because most women gave birth in hospitals, or at the very least, had a midwife. But that wasn't the part that scared me most, what if something happened to the baby?

I tried not to cry again, I really did but it was hard to do with these kinds of thoughts running through my head. I didn't know if I could do this on my own.

I used my strength to pull myself up to a sitting position so I could clean up my mess and then it felt like my body was going to combust.

I whimpered, it hurt, the pain was so strong. I thought about calling 911, or driving myself there, but I knew it would be at least 30 minutes either way because the closest ER was also in Shreveport.

The cat came back in the room and I weakly tried to shoo her away as my body continued to quake, but she pushed her furry head to my thigh and purred while rubbing up against me.

"Oh God!" I groaned, unsure if I could take it any more when I heard a voice from behind.

"Sookie? Dearest are you in here?"

I heard the voice echo in the back of my head opening my eyes weakly for a moment and then I saw his face as he approached the sink area.

"Oh my, Honey are you? Are you in labor right now?" Fintan glanced down at me worriedly and I nodded my head. Although I wasn't sure what a 75 year-old man could do to help me. I doubted he could even lift me up without breaking his hip. Okay that was mean, but I was in labor right now!

"Oh bollox!" He threw his hands up in the air and paced the floor nervously, and I knew we were doomed.

"Alright, give me your hand, Ill help you to the guest bedroom. Have you phoned your Grandmother yet? Or Eric? Or the hospital?"

I nodded my head reluctantly thinking I don't know what good that would do. It was clear this baby was coming, and coming right now. But I knew my Gran said I needed to lay down, maybe that would help to slow things down so I tried my best not to pull Fintan down with me as I struggled to get to the guest bedroom. Miraculously the contractions stopped while in route and when I got there I collapsed against the bed.

"I confess I have no idea what to do right now, could I get you some hot water, tea, or blankets?" He asked worriedly as my forehead began to bead with sweat. I lay back still scared knowing I was going through this alone, without drugs or doctors and I had to be brave and I confessed softly before pain perused and coursed through my body.

"Could you just stay with me?"

Fintan nodded his head and took a chair next to the bed.

"I—" My fatigue was setting in and I admitted as he took my hand and held it.

"I think they are coming, but maybe—Maybe you could try to reach Jason and Tara too."

Fintan nodded looking somewhat relieved to have been given a task and he left the room. I didn't know what was going to happen; attempting not to let the fear sink in, I took the small reprieve to get rid of my sweater. My underwear was ruined too and drenched so I slid them off and threw them into the trash along side the bed. The cat came back into the room and then I felt another contraction, this one the worst of all of them so far.

I had to grip the side of the bed while my body froze in paralysis and then I fell onto the pillows behind my back.

I tried to shoo Tina away again, but Fintan exclaimed…

"She wouldn't let me sleep, kept meowing at me and jumping over my head."

I glanced to our cat and realized maybe she was actually trying to help after all.

_Well why didn't she just say that in the first place?_ I thought. I reached over to pet her furry head and then noticed Fintan was carrying a glass of water and some Tylenol on a plate, decorated with a paper doily.

"I know it isn't as good as the drugs at the hospital, but maybe it can help you a little with your pain." He explained.

I glanced at him in question, not because of the Tylenol but what he was carrying it in on, but just chalked the doily up to some British thing and took the glass from him.

"Thanks." I took a swig from the glass and downed the pills and he announced…

"Your brother is on his way, although I think I might have caught him while he was ah…busy."

I was too tired to offer a comment to that. Of course Jason was off getting lucky while I was being ripped apart by a watermelon, because life is so freaking fair for us women.

Nodding my head I tried to lie back down, and then a pain ran through me that caused my body to curl. I winced, which came out like a hissing sound through my clenched jaw not caring who heard because it hurt so much. I desperately wanted to push right now but I remembered my Gran's warning.

Fintan got up again and he announced.

"I will be right back."

I didn't know where he was going, but at the time, I didn't really care. The tears welled again in my eyes as I felt a heavy pressure on my pelvis stretching it, tearing it. I wanted to pass out, it was the most tempting thing to do at the moment, but my mind wouldn't let me.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh." I cried as my body began to split apart in two. It was happening, I knew it was happening and I couldn't stop it and I was on my own.

I couldn't help it, my thighs parted open and I knew I had to push, it had to stop, I had to stop this pain, and it was unbearable.

"Uhhhhh." I moaned, biting down on my teeth I grit them and then started to push-

"Sookie!" A familiar voice broke my haze and saw Eric first followed by my Gran who was holding a pot of water and Fintan trailing behind with a handful of towels.

"Well there's certainly no time to get her to the hospital." Adele announced and she barked at Eric and Fintan…

"Eric go take her hand and help her sit upright, Fintan, spread out these towels on the bed right here."

She began to roll up her sleeves and rushed into the bathroom to wash her hands.

"You hold tight sweetheart." Gran replied cool as a clam.

Eric came over to me and put his hand over my forehead smoothing the hair away from my sticky skin he replied with a kind smile…

"You didn't think Id miss this did you?"

I nodded my head allowing the warm blue of his eyes to hypnotize me into a calm state and he took my hand.

"You're going to be okay, your Grandmother told me she was once a midwife and Alcide is on his way-"

"Okay, let's get started!" my grandmother announced coming back around to the end of the bed and she looked to Eric and nodded her head. I felt Eric's arm behind me helping me up and padding more pillows behind my back and then he whispered…

"I know you can do this."

I looked at him with a pained expression and he nodded his head in affirmation.

"Sookie honey, I'm going to need you to summon up all your strength for this baby girl, alright, so the next time you feel a contraction, I want you to fight that pain, and fight it hard, and then push with all your might, I nodded my head still unsure if everything would be okay. This wasn't how we had planned it. We had planned to do this in a hospital, with plenty of drugs, and doctors standing by.

I closed my eyes knowing it was looming around the corner; I could feel the familiar pangs striking against my uterus.

I whimpered, and my Gran replied encouraging…

"It's coming honey, your baby is almost here, you just have to be strong now."

I nodded and Eric placed his cool hand against my forehead.

"You're strong and brave, I know you can do it."

He encouraged me and that's when I felt the shooting pain raking through my entire body like a machete knife carving me up inside.

I screamed, the pain so intense but my Gran kept chiding me on…

"PUSH BABY GIRL, PUSH NOW!"

"You can do it!" Eric coaxed and I put all my energy into it, wondering how it was humanly possible to pass something the size of a bowling ball.

My exhaustion came quickly and I fell back against Eric sweaty and balmy. He used a spare towel to wipe my forehead and then he replied with shaky voice…

"That was good Sookie, that was so good."

I looked down to my Gran and asked her weakly…

"Can you see anything?"

She looked again and shook her head.

"Not yet, but soon."

My head fell defeated but Eric tried to keep me positive…

"I am very proud of you." He marveled although I couldn't tell if he was bullshitting me right now or not because I hadn't done much to be proud of, just freaked out a little and cried like a baby. But decided not to press it, I was too tired to. I felt my muscles clench and Gran nodded her head…

"Okay, time to do it again. Give it everything you have to give!"

I pushed with everything sure I had used every ounce of spare strength I possessed and squeezed my muscles willing it to work.

Dizzy with the pain, I wondered if I was starting to build up a tolerance because that time it didn't hurt as much and I glanced to Gran wanting to know the progress…

"Can you see her?"

Gran pursed her lips and glanced from me to Eric and she replied…

"No, but that could be a good thing, it will give your Doctor more time to get here and maybe we can even get you to the hospital."

I glanced to Eric worriedly knowing the need for a hospital wasn't good. That meant there were complications.

If he was alarmed however he wasn't showing it and he nodded in agreement with my Gran.

"It's fine, you can get the medical attention you need then."

I pursed my lips still worried and Gran announced…

"Why don't we try pushing one more time and then we'll give you a break okay?"

I nodded my head my brain too clouded to think of anything else. Eric's fingers clenched tightly around my middle and then we went again.

When there was no baby yet, I started to cry. Eric pulled me towards his chest in an attempt to comfort me.

"It's okay these things take time." He whispered while brushing back my hair, which didn't change the fact that something was most definitely wrong. I was dilated, very much so. I just knew in my heart there should have been something by now.

There was a knock at the front door and Fintan left to go answer, only 5 seconds later Pam burst through the bedroom door with Alcide following her coat tails.

"You just had to go the HIGH DRAMA route DIDN'T YOU? Eric, what the hell were you doing in Shreveport while she was stuck here giving birth to your baby?" Pam insisted clearly worked up but Alcide cut in front of her and he spat back.

"Pam, get out!"

She pursed her lips angrily and glared at him replying…

"If you think for one second I'm going to stand idly by while my best friend goes through the torture of a natural birth, think again!"

"Pam, I mean it!" Alcide warned her and she frowned, finally backing down she answered stubbornly…

"Fine but I want to see a healthy mom and baby when you come back out through those doors, capish?"

Alcide rolled his eyes and replied…

"We'll be fine, now go."

He glanced at Fintan and suggested…

"She might need a chaperone, she gets into trouble when no one's around to keep an eye on her."

Fintan nodded his head and answered soundly…

"Say no more son, but I second her motion, please take care of my granddaughter."

"I will." Alcide remarked and then it was the 4 of us. He greeted us, walked over to the bathroom to wash up and then he came over to me asked how I was doing, to which I couldn't lie and say I wasn't terrified right now, and then he took a look under my skirt.

"She's dilated about 8 centimeters."

He glanced to my Gran and asked her if she could hand him some tools out of his medical bag. In the meantime Alcide put a towel over my legs and pushed my skirt up to feel my belly. I watched him with held breath along with Eric until his fingers stopped right below my navel.

"What is it?" Eric finally asked, his grip on me iron tight and Alcide replied…

"I think we are dealing with a Posterior labor."

"What on Earth does that mean?" Eric asked trying to control his rising tension. I could see the vein in his forehead and I knew it was only a matter of time before he could lose it to; he had kept his cool up until now.

"It means the babies head is face up, against her belly button and caught on the rift."

My face fell in horror immediately assuming the worst but Alcide took my other hand, the one Eric wasn't squeezing to death and he assured me…

"Don't worry, we just need to help you get the baby in the right position, and we need to get you to relax a little."

Yeah like that was going to happen.

I took a deep breath, feeling tremors of pain approach, and Alcide replied stepping away from the bed.

"Sookie, I want you to stand up."

He looked to Eric and replied…

"And Eric, I want you to get behind her, you are going to try to lift her belly, as high as it can go."

Eric nodded helping me up off the bed. It felt like I was trying to move with a bowling ball between my legs, but other than that, I kept my balance.

"Okay, gentle but firm, keep doing that until I come back." Alcide announced but I met his gaze worriedly and asked him.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to call your local hospital to make sure they have team of surgeons on stand by."

The color in Eric's face drained and I knew this wasn't good.

"Don't worry, it's just a plan B incase this doesn't work, but we have to act quickly."

"If this doesn't work does that mean I will need a Cesarean?" I asked with dry mouth my muscles tensing and Alcide replied…

"It's a possibility, bottom line is making sure you're comfortable and both you and the baby are safe."

"What can we do to avoid that?" Eric asked with clenched jaw, I had never seen him so serious and Alcide replied…

"Just keep doing what you are doing, help her relax so that baby can reposition itself."

Eric nodded and Alcide left. My Gran announced that she was going to go get some more hot water and then I felt Eric's arms encircle me and lift on my belly. It felt sore at first but then I experienced relief because he had taken some of the pressure off my uterus.

"Do you want to go to the hospital?" Eric asked me gently from behind and I glanced at him for a moment in pause asking him hesitantly…

"Do you think that would be better for us?" I wanted to make sure the baby was okay first and foremost, not liking the idea of going under the knife, but if it came down to it, I could do it for her, and Eric insisted…

"Truthfully, I hate the idea, but I want to make sure you are okay."

I met his gaze with pain stricken eyes reminded briefly of the night of Eric's proposal and our conversation about Eric donating his kidneys. At the point it was hard for me to understand how he could do it, I hated the idea, but now I realized the shoe was on the other foot and it was my turn and I replied.

"I don't want to either, but I will do it if necessary, I want to make sure she's okay."

Eric smiled faintly and planted a soft kiss on my forehead and then Alcide and my Gran came back in.

Alcide announced.

"Okay, we have a team ready to receive you if we can't get her out naturally. Don't worry they are all highly qualified, a friend of mine who also happens to be a plastic surgeon is on duty as well so he can make sure your scarring would be minimal."

I nodded my head and then Alcide gestured to the bed.

"So are you ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be." I confessed feeling a wave of calm wash over me as Eric's hands rested on my shoulders.

I got back on the bed and Alcide took out some other pieces of equipment. He looked to Adele and nodded his head.

"Alright Sookie, I want you to wait for my signal. Try to envision that you are a champagne bottle, and your baby is the cork, but we have to make sure we can build up enough pressure from behind to loosen that cork, so I want you to reserve your strength until I say you can push."

I nodded my head and Eric gave me his arms to brace myself with as I sat on the edge of the bed.

I felt the pain approach and tried to breath again to keep myself calm, while Eric whispered words of encouragement in my ears like 'Your so brave', 'So beautiful', and 'I cant wait to meet our baby.'

It was all building up in side; I could feel the intense pressure again. I wanted to push but Alcide put his hand out.

"On my count…"

I met his gaze and he nodded his head…

"Okay Sookie, on the count of 3…one, two, three. And PUSH!"

I squeezed putting everything into it, my back, my butt, my legs, my hips, my pelvis and I felt something lodge into me prying my womb apart. I gasped in immense pain as my head began to bead with sweat. Then Alcide looked to me and he replied with a smile…

"I can see her now, I can see the top of her head."

"You're doing it Sookie." Eric replied gasping in relief from behind.

"Okay, same thing this next time, I want you to wait for me, try to put even more into it."

I didn't know if that was possible but I wanted to get this baby out of me like yesterday so I nodded my head.

"Fight the pain baby girl, use the pain as a tool to push." My Gran proclaimed from the side.

My body began to clench again and my legs trembled and then Alcide put pressure on my belly.

"Okay, wait for my count."

I nodded my head, trying to not pass out from the surge of pain that had just shot through me and he replied as I gripped Eric's hands in mine like a vice…

"On the count of five…one, two, three, four, five, now PUSH!"

"PUSH SOOKIE, PUSH!" My Gran chanted. I bit down on my teeth a whimper of pain escaping my mouth and I put everything into it once more. I felt Alcide put pressure on my tummy and I cried out as my insides tore apart.

"You're almost there." Eric remarked holding me as I was crushing him.

"The head is out, I need you to do it one more time Sookie, okay? On my count…"

I could barely see, I desperately wanted to faint right now, but I knew I had to do this and I nodded my head tiredly.

Eric wiped the sweat from my brow and we waited longer this time.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, now PUSH!"

"PUSH, You can do it Sookie! She's almost here!" Eric chanted from behind and I clenched down on his hands once more. Sure I had broken them both, I lifted my hips, screamed out a battle cry as my body was ripped in two, my life flashing before my eyes the pain was so incredibly intense and then it was quiet.

I felt more pressure down there and Alcide pulled. I was so tired, needing to close my eyes for a moment inhaling the peaceful silence and then we were interrupted by a new unidentified high-pitched cry.

"You did it Sookie, say hello to your beautiful baby girl." Alcide replied breaking my lucid trance.

I dared to open my eyes, and took this creature in for the first time. The vision of her stilled my breath. She looked just like an angel to me in that moment and I reached for her.

"Let me clean her up first Darlin." My Gran announced and Alcide looked to Eric and he asked him…

"Would you like to cut the umbilical chord?"

I had never seen Eric speechless like this before, if I hadn't felt the exact same way, I would have thought it funny, and finally he nodded his head.

Eric made the snip, surprisingly; I could no longer feel pain, my body running on pure adrenaline and then Alcide explained…

"Okay Sookie, one more push, to get the placenta out and then you can rest."

"I thought you said I was done." I remarked in exhaustion, but I knew I had to do this. Eric returned to take my hand as Gran carried her off into the rest room, and Alcide nodded his head.

"Okay, go ahead, one, two, three, PUSH!"

It was out and then she brought her back in to my delight, while Alcide left to go wash up, all the pain from before forgotten. I would do it all over again if I could see her sweet face looking back at me. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

"She has your mouth and nose." Eric smirked as my Gran handed her to me and I looked down noting the beautiful blue of her eyes.

"And she has your eyes." I mused, knowing she would.

We both just sat there in awe of this perfect little life lying before us wrapped in a little blanket.

"Ten fingers and ten toes too." My Gran announced proudly and Eric marveled bringing his large fingers down to her little blonde fuzzy head.

"She is perfect."

I smiled and nodded my head in agreement and replied as she started to grip my finger in her tiny hand.

"Yes, she most certainly is."

The love I had for this new life, this baby I had never met was unbelievably strong, I actually felt my heart swell a little in that moment.

I looked up at him for the first time seeing tears in his eyes, which made me want to cry too. They were tears of happiness of course, but I was like a sponge to the emotional stuff. Eric leaned down and kissed my mouth softly and then he kissed her little forehead. And I felt a stray tear escape my eyes. Sniffling he smiled and wiped it away for me. Eve was such a little fire bolt of energy though, she didn't even notice. Her eyes wandering everywhere and her little arms reaching up to the sky above.

Then I noticed that she was dressed in the most adorable pink knitted sleeper and I looked at my Gran in dismay.

I knew she had knitted the sleeper by hand and marveled at it.

"Oh Gran, this is beautiful."

"I was saving this for an occasion just like this one and lucky for you I stocked up on plenty of baby supplies for when I get to baby-sit, she's got a diaper on and a onesie too under there."

I shook my head in disbelief and thanked her for all of her help.

"Gran you are incredible, I don't know what I would have done without you. Fintan too, he actually kept me somewhat calm while we were waiting for you, and Tina too." I admitted.

"Well, I'm secretly thrilled you decided to have her here because now I can spoil y'all rotten for the next couple days, so we are both winners."

I smirked and looked at Eric thinking we were right back where we started, back here in this house. I knew he wasn't leaving my side and Eric communicated as much by kissing my hand and adding…

"Well, I think we both may need to watch you do that a few more times before we get the hang of it, because having her dressed and changed in under 3 minutes is quite impressive." Eric remarked and my Gran pinched his cheek.

"Don't worry, you'll have plenty of poop and pee on your hand's to break you into fatherhood too Sugar."

I smirked as Eric scrunched up his nose and then my Gran handed the baby to him.

It warmed my heart to see our little girl with her daddy. It was as if she belonged there all along. And Eric was so happy. His face just lit up. I wished I had a camera in that moment. They were my rays of sunshine at the end of the very long tunnel. I was about to comment on the perfect picture they made when Pam burst through the door, Jason and Tara and Fintan trailing behind.

"I'm afraid you have drawn quite the crowd my dear." Fintan mused and I couldn't help but smile.

"Oh my God! Eric it's a miniature version of you!" Pam went up to them in amazement, her classy chic demeanor gone as her face spread into a goofy wide smile, which spread contagiously around the room.

"I'm glad you came out of it okay." Tara remarked with a smile putting her hand on my shoulder and I nodded placing my hand over hers.

"Thanks, me to." I remarked.

"Me three." Gran added and then Eric concluded…"I think we all are."

Jason was standing there scratching the back of his neck hesitantly, I could tell he was anxious about something and I asked him…

"Jason, do you want to hold her?"

He smirked and then nodded his head appreciatively concluding…

"Could I?"

"Of course." Eric and I replied simultaneously and he handed her to Jason.

"So, ah, did you ever come up with a name? I know she's a girl and all, but maybe Jasafina or Jasalynn or something could work?" Jason asked as Tara rolled her eyes from the side.

"Honey, I know colored folk come up with some weird shit names, but you take the cake."

I smirked back at Eric and he to me and then I finally announced.

"Actually, we were thinking we would name her Eve."

I wanted to break the news gently to Jason, not admitting that his name was out of the running even before we knew we were having a girl.

Fintan raised his brows, as did my Gran and I explained…

"She's named after the brave little girl that saved Fintan's life, we thought that would make it more special."

"Evelyn Sofia Northman, Sofia after my mother" Eric concluded and Gran's smile broadened and she remarked…

"That is so beautiful."

"Uh sure, okay." Jason remarked, trying to hide his clear disappointment. But Eve was doing her best to charm him anyway and I saw him crack a smile and make a funny face when no one else was looking.

"Did you plan that? Plan that Eve would take your initials and Sofia would have Sookie's?" Pam remarked and Eric looked at me in amazement. I hadn't even realized it, but it was true. E for Eric, S for Sookie. Everything fitted perfectly.

"Hi little Eve!" Tara waved at her and she smiled, and I couldn't help but think how perfect her name sounded right now.

Alcide had cleaned up and came back in to put his arm around Pam's shoulder.

"Thank you Alcide, for everything." I replied and Eric reached over to shake his hand.

"We owe you big time my friend, you need a house sitter or a place to hold your next party, whatever, you just let me know."

Alcide simply smiled and he answered as Tara took a hold of Eve.

"Well I'm sure you can make it up to us sooner or later, probably the former." He smirked at Pam and she swallowed hesitantly.

I met Eric's gaze in question, the two of us clearly not understanding what he meant by that and I asked him…

"Why, what's going on?"

"Ill tell you when you're not still covered in your own insides because well frankly this whole situation petrifies me." Pam answered.

I smirked at Pam wondering what was going on and Alcide explained…

"I think she's just freaking herself out right now." He smiled smugly at Pam who had rolled her eyes in reply, and I glanced to Eric, more confused now than ever.

He didn't say anything and I knew it was up to me to get to the bottom of it, so I asked her.

"C'mon Pam, after all I've been through today, I think we deserve to hear your news."

"It scares me to even say it."

"Pam seriously, you can't chicken out on me, you wouldn't let me do that to you."

Pam glanced from Alcide to me to Eve hesitantly and then she took a deep breath and swallowed. After her gaze locked with mine she replied.

"Well let's just say we might be looking at pre-schools together when the time comes"

I was still confused until it hit me, and then my jaw dropped, and Eric asked in disbelief.

"Wait a minute! You're pregnant?"

Pam nodded and she got this strange look in her eyes. I tried not to snort out a laugh because I knew that was true karma playing its hand.

"Yes, it seems the tide has turned, now you get to give me parenting advice." Pam replied and Alcide smirked back at her.

"She hasn't quite come to terms with the concept of giving birth, let alone having a baby naturally."

But instead of laughing outright, I replied giving her a hearty...

"Well I think congratulations are in order."

"I guess we know who will be on our babysitting list." Eric chided. My Gran looked at him in question and he explained.

"Of course after her grandmother who is at the top."

She smiled pleased with his correction and Tara handed Eve over to Pam.

"Here, sounds like you're gonna need the most practice."

And just like that as if on cue Eve gurgled up a long drop of spit all over Pam's Chanel suit.

Alcide couldn't help but laugh along with everyone else, handing Pam a towel he remarked...

"We'll have to make sure to baby proof your clothes first."

"Ha ha." Pam chided knowing everyone was having a laugh at her expense, and then to prove us all wrong she touched the tip of Eve's nose with her forefinger causing her to giggle and I thought I had never heard a sound so sweet.

As they all admired her, I looked over to Eric taking the tiny moment to our selves to hold his hand and whisper...

"Thank you."

He met my gaze in question leaning closer to me, which made my pulse rate pick up and he asked me brushing away some stray hairs from my balmy forehead.

"For what?" He asked softly.

I blinked up at him, smiled, and I finally replied...

"For giving me her."

Eric smiled and he whispered charmingly, his lips mere centimeters from mine...

"Well in that case, I should thank you too Mommy." I couldn't help but smile liking the sound of that, because I truly felt like one now. I knew I would die to protect my family. I didn't thank Eric for everything else he gave me besides Eve, because the list was too long, but I wanted him to know that aside from being here with me today, he was the most important man on Earth to me.

I met his gaze longingly wondering if it was possible to love him more after just giving birth and assessed that with Eric it seemed to be the case because I was just so happy right now and I concluded with a whisper over his lips.

"You're welcome Daddy."

Eric smiled and concluded before he leaned down to kiss me...

"Mmm, yes I like the sound of that."

Our lips finally connected and I was carried off on a cloud, Eric standing behind me and Eve in my arms and I knew we were going to be okay.

"And I like it even better that we found a way to upstage Pam."

I couldn't help but giggle into his mouth, which caused some of our visitors to glance back towards the bed.

"Oh c'mon man, get a room!" Jason remarked clearly still creeped out. Images of me on that camera flashed through my mind and I imagined he was probably remembering the same thing, but before I could tell him to buzz off, Gran intervened...

"All right everyone, why don't we give Sookie, Eric, and little Eve some time to themselves."

I mouthed Gran a thank you and everyone said goodbye to us on the way out. Fintan planted a kiss on my cheek, Tara squeezed my hand, Jason patted my knee, Alcide took my hand and squeezed it, Pam leaned in to hug me, and then Gran handed me Eve and closed the door behind her.

I looked at Eric and he looked at me and we both just knew it. All that bad stuff before was behind us now. Everything that mattered to me was in this room now, well in this house actually. I didn't care about anything else because love and family is what truly mattered. I knew it was all worth it to get to this point, Bill, Godric, Eric's trial, Fintan, Eve. We somehow all just fit together, like 3 missing puzzle pieces destined to find their way home to one another.

We both watched our perfect little Eve. She was 'Eve' in her own right, inspired by the original but never to be outshined by her, and Eric got in the bed beside me. He slipped his arm around me and placed his hand on her tiny head as we both admired the beautiful life we had just created together now sleeping in my arms peacefully, a smile on Eric's face and a smile on mine, and I knew-it all finally made sense now.

_The End._

_xxx_

_**AN2**: Also, I'm taking a nice long break from writing after this to catch up on reading and to restore my creative juices, but I do have something else kicking around in my head as a sequel to 'The Witch's Curse,' and if you know that story, you know that vampire Eric, and human Sookie are about to have a kid together, lots of other stuff happens too, like crazy king Felipe trying to get Eric to move to Las Vegas, Sookie dealing with a new baby and her life living with a vampire, as well as vampire politics, to which baby Northman gets caught in the middle. Lot's of potential for drama. Im going to call it "Written in Blood." so if you are interested, and have not done so already, add me to your author alerts, and by all means, please stay tuned. xo_


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